Jim McElwain Fired at Florida – Post Week 9 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!


Jim McElwain Fired at Florida

Having known many University of Florida alumni for 30+ years we have a Helluva lot to say about the firing of Jim McElwain at Florida but the bottom-line is that…

Jim McElwain’s Unbelievable Unimaginable Over-The-Freaking-Top Arrogance

….got Jimmy’s ass fired at Florida and here’s a tip for everyone out there whether you are in coaching or in ANY kind of job for that matter….

If you are going to be a Pompous Arrogant Ass Know-It-All Who Believes He/She Spun Up the Universe

…then you better Damn be Very Damn Great at your job and if a football coach win a Helluva lot of football games and championships!

Jim McElwain was done in by his own Damn Arrogance and that’s one of the oldest stories in human history going back to the dawn of time.

Memo to Jim McElwain:  Drop the Pompous Arrogant that you are God’s Gift to the Earth already…we have plenty of those folks already in this world and one less would be a Very Damn Good Thing Jimmy!

Post Week 9 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

Thank You Mr. Man in Black!

1.  Butch Jones, Tennessee – Since beating Georgia on a last second Hail-Mary play on October 1, 2016 last season which left the Vols at 5 – 0 and on top of the SEC East Division Butch Jones Tennessee football team has posted a record of…

7 – 9

…in the last 16 games and the Vols could easily be 1 – 7 in 2017 after razor thin wins over Georgia Tech and UMass this year.

A 7 – 9 record at almost all schools in the SEC will quickly put your ass on the Hot Seat and headed for a sure-fire firing but these are interesting times at Tennessee where it seems that Butch Jones is going to both be forced to walk the plank and then pushed overboard by the UT Administration with a long pole just as he reaches the end of the board!

With games left against…

Southern Miss
At Missouri

…for the 3 – 5 Vols there is a decent chance that Tennessee will have a losing record in Jones FIFTH season on the job and that’s unacceptable at Vanderbilt so for Damn sure it’s unacceptable in Knoxville!

As all college football fans saw this past weekend the difference between Winning and Losing is many times is very small and if there is one thing we would point to that has been the difference between Tennessee losing so many close games under Butch Jones it has been Jones unique ability to cast doubt in Vols players minds if Jones knows what the Hell is doing or not, often by Jones own comments in public, and there is nothing that weakens a team more than one or more of the team members having any doubt all about their leader.

In many ways Butch Jones is a terrific case book example of how a coach SHOULD NOT handle the media and certainly a college head football coach, if he knows what the Hell he is doing, knows how to properly handle the media which just like with football players requires many different ways to handle different members of the news media. The number one rule of a public official such as a head football coach at a high profile school like Tennessee is…

Don’t Shoot Yourself in the Ass

…and Butch Jones has shot himself in the ass so much the last five years by saying so many Damn stupid things and having such an almost paranoid view of the news media, especially the news media in Knoxville, as if they were out to get him it was inevitable that Butch would work himself to his current spot which is…

A Roaring Fire Under His Ass

….and 97% chance or better that Jones will either be coaching at another school in 2018 or be out of coaching all-together!

2.  David Beaty, Kansas – It’s as obvious that the wind blows in the state of Kansas that David Beaty should have never been hired as the head football coach at Kansas nor in our opinion had David Beaty ever done anything in his coaching career up to when he was hired at KU to have EARNED the right to be the head coach of a Big 12 school but then now….Kansas also hired Charlie Weis who we wouldn’t hire to shovel shit so in some ways David Beaty was a step-up from Chubby Charlie!

With the loss to Kansas State on Saturday David Beaty’s records at Kansas now stand at…

Overall:  3 – 29

Big 12:  1 – 22

…and the Jayhawks still have to play this season games against:

At Texas
At Oklahoma State

Best Case Scenario Kansas beats Baylor at home on Saturday and then loses its last three games to finish at…

2 – 10

…in David Beaty’s THIRD year on the job and if that’s acceptable in Lawrence then those folks are beyond help and need to be committed to the nearest insane asylum!

3.  Lovie Smith, Illinois – With all the mediocre to bad head coaches in the NFL there might be an opportunity for Illini head football coach Lovie Smith to return to the pro game in the near future because there’s not a chance in Hell that anyone at Coaches Hot Seat thinks that Lovie should be coaching college football and Smith’s records at Illinois of…

Overall:  5 – 15

Big Ten:  2 – 12

….prove that as do the Illinois recruiting classes which according to Rivals.com in 2017 was…


…behind Duke, Oregon State, Iowa State, and Rutgers and the Illinois current recruiting class in 2018 which according to Rivals.com is ranked…


…behind Syracuse, Wake Forest, Kansas, UCF, Navy, Army, Western Kentucky, Rutgers, Iowa State….well you get the idea which is in homage to Larry David…..


2 – 6 Illinois still has to play in 2017….

At Purdue
At Ohio State

…which to use looks like 3 or even 4 more losses which would be a record of 3 – 9 or 2 – 10 which is following a record of 3 – 9 last season!

Lovie Smith had the respectful record of…

81 – 63 (.563)

…in coaching the Chicago Bears for 9 seasons which included one trip to a Super Bowl and three trips to the Playoffs and if we were Lovie Smith we would have our agent talking to NFL clubs about potential head coaching job opportunities because from where we sit this college gig is going to end one way and one way only…

Lovie Smith getting his ass fired!

4.  Kliff Kingsbury, Texas Tech – For someone making $3.5 million dollars plus a year Kliff Kingsbury isn’t exactly lighting any fires in West Texas putting up records of…

Overall:  28 – 30

Big 12:  14 – 28

…..in FIVE seasons at Texas Tech and in fact instead of lighting fires Kingsbury has been a bucket of cold water for the Red Raiders who again are fighting just to get to a .500 record in 2017.

Now at 4 – 4 on the season after the loss to Oklahoma Kingsbury and his Texas Tech football team still have to play games against…

Kansas State
At Texas

…and one has to think that even at Texas Tech when you are…

Average As Hell

….your ass will eventually get fired….right?


Just by comparison the previous two head coaches at Texas Tech, Mike Leach and Tommy Tuberville posted a combined record in Big 12 play of….

56 – 50  (.528)

….which means Kingsbury took over a pretty good football program in Lubbock and Kliff has posted a winning percentage in Big 12 play of…


….which is nothing short of a Total Freaking Disaster for Texas Tech Football!

5.  Bret Bielema, Arkansas – It’s not an admirable thing that in his 59 th game as the head coach at Arkansas….

Which was a MAJOR football program in the SEC when Bielema took it over

….that you have to come storming back to barely beat an Ole Miss football that had its head coach run out of town before the season and even with that win Arkansas is still sitting on a record of 3 – 5 with still games against:

Coastal Carolina
Mississippi State

This looks to us like a final record of 4 – 8 or 5 – 7 for Arkansas in Bret Bielema’s FIFTH year on the job when by all rights the former head coach of a team in the Big Ten that took his team to three Rose Bowl games should really be hitting his stride and competing for the SEC West and yet….

It took a last second field goal to beat an Ole Miss team had its coach get run and will most certainly have a losing season in 2017!

As one of our Arkansas-alum buddies from Ft. Smith, Arkansas told us on Sunday about the current state of Arkansas Football:

“There are some folks up in Fayetteville that would rather burn down the entire football program and university than admit they were wrong.”

Amen to that brother…Amen to that!

6.  Jim Mora, UCLA – Just how bad have things gotten at UCLA after the Bruins loss to Washington on Saturday?

In UCLA’s last 24 games under Jim Mora the Bruins have posted a record of…

9 – 15

…and UCLA still has to play in 2017 games against…

At Utah
Arizona State

…which at best we see the 4 – 4 Bruins splitting which would be a .500 record but is a .500 record in your SIXTH year on the job acceptable at UCLA

Well actually now…we are talking about UCLA Football here where .500 records will keep your ass employed for a Helluva long time because in case you didn’t know it…

UCLA = Average As Hell and Proud Of It!

7.  Mike Riley, Nebraska – How bad has the football gotten at Nebraska?

The NEBRASKA CORNHUSKERS needed a last minute touchdown to beat PURDUE on Saturday and fans of Nebraska Football were actually surprised that the Huskers got the win over a PURDUE team that just lost to RUTGERS!

Yes…that’s the world we live in today where they throw a party in Nebraska when they beat Purdue in the last minute and now the 4 – 4…Yep…4 and Freaking 4 Cornhuskers get to go play games against..

At Minnesota
At Penn State

….and if Nebraska plays its BEST football they will get to 6 wins in 2017!


With that Nebraska win over PURDUE Mike Riley’s record in Lincoln now stand at…

Overall:  19 – 15

Big Ten:  12 – 10

….which with 34 games on the books puts Mike Riley’s overall winning percentage at Nebraska is…


…and former and fired Nebraska head coach Bill Callahan…how in the Hell did Bill Callahan get hired at Nebraska is still a shocker to the core…had a winning percentage after 34 games of…


Oh…just for kicks Bo Pelini’s winning percentage after 34 games at Nebraska was…


Yep…if the folks in the Great State of Nebraska are thrilled about beating PURDUE in the last minute then we congratulate you because you are now just like UCLA Football…

Average As Hell and Proud Of It!

8.  Kevin Sumlin, Texas A&M – One really has to wonder how Kevin Sumlin could allow a football team like Mississippi State that got its ass whipped by Georgia and Auburn on the road to come into Kyle Field and whip the Hell out of his Aggies by the score of 35 – 14 when Sumlin knew his ass would be on the line if A&M lost to the Bulldogs by just one point…instead the Aggies just flat-out…

Got Their Asses Whipped

…by the Bulldogs which makes us really wonder:

Just what in the Hell is Kevin Sumlin doing to earn that $5 Million Dollars A Year because for Damn sure he didn’t seem to bother to get his team ready to play a home game against Mississippi State!

You are making $5 Million Dollars A Year Sumlin…is it too Damn much for fans of Texas A&M Football to expect you to…

Have Your Damn Team Ready To Play Football?

Kevin Sumlin now has a record at Kyle Field against Power 5 schools of..

9 – 13

….which is a stadium where Texas A&M should next to NEVER lose a football game to any team not named Alabama is something that is impossible for Sumlin nor anyone else to explain and now the 5 – 3 Aggies have to finish the season against…

New Mexico
At Ole Miss

Talk about a game that the outcome of will more than likely decide the future status of the two coaches this coming Saturday’s game of Auburn at Texas A&M is…

Losing Coach Is Going To Get His Ass Fired For Sure

…which should make for great TV viewing but which no doubt will be miserable for both Hot Seat coaches Gus Malzahn and Kevin Sumlin who with a loss will put their ass in a totally untenable situation that can only be avoided by doing one thing…

Winning the Damn Football Game!

Memo to Kevin Sumlin: This time Son how about getting your Texas A&M Football team ready to play against Auburn! Is that really too much to ask since after your ass is making…

$5 Million Dollars A Year?

Geez some of these coaches are getting away with Bullshit + Mediocrity that wouldn’t be tolerated in ANY company in America with workers making $40,000 a year!

9.  Larry Fedora, North Carolina – Yes…there is a GOD and that GOD has evidently decided that since the NCAA doesn’t give a Damn that the..

University of North Carolina

…wouldn’t bother to monitor the academic activities of their student athletes….i.e…UNC athletes were involved in…

Massive Academic Fraud

….that then North Carolina Football should totally crater and that’s exactly what has happened to the now 1 – 8 Tar Heels who will hopefully go straight into the bowels of Hell and be…

Totally Destroyed

…before all is said and done and let’s hope that UNC will get its ass whipped in their last three games against..

At Pitt
Western Carolina
At NC State

Hell…even this North Carolina team will be able to beat Western Carolina but then a record of…

2 – 10

…is a Total Damn Disaster and it couldn’t happen to an athletic department at North Carolina that is full of…

Worthless Bastards

…that in our opinion allowed Massive Academic Fraud to go for decades and did NOTHING!

Please God….Destroy North Carolina Football and Basketball because for Damn sure the NCAA wasn’t willing to do their duty while at the same time opening the door for other schools to commit….

Massive Academic Fraud

..and when all that Massive Academic Fraud goes before an NCAA Committee the schools will just say…

“Look at what you let North Carolina get away with!”

Go To Hell North Carolina and the NCAA too for that matter!

10.  Todd Graham, Arizona State – Todd Graham just wadded up and tossed into the trash those two nice wins over Washington and Utah with ASU’s disastrous performance against USC on Saturday night and now the 4 – 4 Sun Devils will have to play some great football down the stretch to save their head coach’s job who needs 7+ wins to hang onto his job with games left against…

At Oregon State

Since we haven’t a clue which Arizona State team will show up to play in the above last four games we haven’t a clue what the Sun Devils will finish at this season but we would recommend this to Todd Graham…

Win 3 of your last 4 games Son or it’s….

…for you Tempe!

Leave a Comment