Post 2017 College Football Season Coaches Hot Seat Rankings
As We Enter 2018 Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!
1. David Beaty, Kansas – After three seasons as the head coach of the Kansas football team David Beaty has records on the board of…
Overall: 3 – 33
Big 12: 1 – 26
…and if there is ANYONE on the Earth that can explain to us why Beaty is still the head coach of the Jayhawks…outside a few lunatics in Lawrence, Kansas that hired and No Damn Big Surprise had to fire Charlie Weis in the same position before Beaty was hired….we would love to hear from you so that we can refer you to the closest mental institution so your ass can get some help…and quick!
Yes…David Beaty has won 3 games in 3 seasons coaching at Kansas and those 3 wins were against…
2017 – SE Missouri State
2016 – Rhode Island
2016 – Texas….Oh Charlie Strong that was Pitiful Son!
Oh…maybe David Beaty was kept on for a FOURTH year at Kansas because of an Amazing Recruiting Class and yet as we check the latest…
….we find Kansas’ 2018 recruiting class at…
…behind schools such as….
#69 – Toledo
#68 – Houston
#66 – Tulane
#64 – FIU
#63 – Western Michigan
#61 – Boise State
#59 – Duke
#58 – Iowa State
#57 – Wake Forest
#50 – Cincinnati
Do we need to go on? Didn’t think so!
Hey…Kansas can have any Damn coach they want to lead their football program but in the Real World where only Damn Morons hire Damn Idiots like Charlie Weis THREE years is plenty of Damn time to know or not if a football program is moving in the right direct and thus it’s No Damn Surprise that someone that hired Charlie Weis would keep David Beaty on when Beaty hasn’t done One Damn Thing to have earned the right to coach the Jayhawks for a FOURTH season!
A sidenote in this spot we do note that we have been told by someone we trust that more than one Very Damn Qualified Head Coach has reached out to the folks at Kansas to say that “X coach” would love to coach the Jayhawks and maybe we should start writing the names of those coaches to show just what kind of Damn Idiots are running Kansas Athletics and the University of Kansas right now!
2. Lovie Smith, Illinois – Lovie Smith took over an Illini football team two years ago that had won…
…the two previous seasons before Lovie’s arrival and in two years on the job Lovie has records on the board of:
Overall: 5 – 19
Big Ten: 2 – 16
For those slow on the uptake that’s a plus-50% decline in wins and thus we haven’t a Damn Clue why anyone at Illinois would think that firing longtime college head coach Bill Cubit to hire Lovie Smith who last coached in college over 20 years beyond some hack agent of Lovie’s convincing the AD at Illinois, Josh Whitman, that hiring Lovie would make sense when if anyone at Coaches Hot Seat had taken that call would have said:
“Please…tell me what qualifies Lovie Smith to be the head football coach at Illinois or any Power 5 Conference school?”
There is NO good answer to the above question especially when one considers that when hiring Lovie Smith you are not getting a coach that “fits” the college game like a Pete Carroll who is….
Actually Alive and Awake on the Sidelines During the Games
….while Lovie has around the intensity level of a Tom Landry who was a Helluva pro coach with the Cowboys but would have been a Damn Failure if he had ever tried to coach in the college game!
What does the future hold for Lovie Smith at Illinois?
Our opinion…Lovie Smith will be fired at Illinois..either after the 2018 season or the 2019 season…because we don’t think there’s a chance in Hell the Illini come close to win 6 games in either of the next two years and if you can’t win 6 games at Illinois then what exactly is the point of you being the head coach of the football team?
There is NO point is the answer to that question!
3. Kliff Kingsbury, Texas Tech – If anyone had told us FIVE years ago that Kliff Kingsbury could post records of…
Overall: 30 – 33
Big 12: 16 – 29
…at Texas Tech and still be the head coach after his FIFTH year on the job we would have never believed it but then we have never thought Texas Tech AD Kirby Hocutt…
Cared About or Gave A Damn About Winning
…and it’s also our opinion Hocutt willingness to tolerate the above records from Kingsbury points to our opinion being right and even worse the alumni, boosters and fans of Red Raider Football that also seem….
Do Not Care About or Give A Damn About Winning!
One thing we are Very Damn Thankful for here at Coaches Hot Seat:
Kirby Hocutt is alive today in America and was not around in the early 1940s when WINNING was very Damn important and LOSING was not tolerated because if LOSING had been tolerated there would be no country for us Americans to live in today!
Be Proud fans of Texas Tech Football…
You are Below Damn Average and have an Athletic Director that Celebrates and Rewards Below Damn Average!
Guns Up and Give that Hocutt Boy your hard-earned money and be Damn proud when you do it!
4. Luke Fickell, Cincinnati – We saw enough of Luke Fickell as the interim head coach of Ohio State in 2011 after Jim Tressel got run out of town to lying to his bosses to know that Fickell was Damn Good at taking a team that should have won 10 games EASY and ended with a record of…
6 – 7
…costing the Buckeyes a shot at a National Title in 2012 under Urban Meyer when the team went undefeated after Ohio State AD Gene Smith and what must be a Helluva lot of stupid people in Columbus sent the Buckeyes to a meaningless bowl game…to know that Luke Fickell was not head coaching material!
No…we would NEVER had hired Luke Fickell to be the head coach at Cincinnati or ANY FBS school but then we actually watch football games here at Coaches Hot Seat and don’t believe Horseshit just because it is coming from a coach or an agent or someone else about Fickell or anyone else and what did Cincinnati get for hiring Luke Fickell as their coach?
Fickell took a team that should have EASY won 6+ games in 2017 and he posted a record of…
4 – 8
Our opinion…Luke Fickell is a nice guy… a solid guy…but he is not Head Coaching material no more than Kansas head coach David Beaty is head coaching material and the folks at Cincinnati like the folks at Kansas can either realize and understand that now or realize and understand it in the future but eventually….they will realize and understand it to be a FACT!
Our guess…Cincinnati has another losing season in 2018 under Fickell and Fickell will be fired because unlike Kansas which can tolerate losing seasons until the Earth ends the folks in Cincinnati don’t have that luxury and with that in mind Fickell better Damn get off his ass or he will be back in the assistant coaching ranks a year from today!
5. Kalani Sitake, BYU – Like Luke Fickell BYU head coach Kalani Sitake is another nice guy…a solid guy…but watching the BYU Cougars play several times in 2017 we cannot help but wonder…
Just what in the Hell is Kalani Sitake doing because his BYU football team looks like it is barely coached at times!
A 4 – 9 record in 2017 after a 9 – 4 record in 2016 certainly means Sitake has the ability to win games coaching the Cougars but he going to have to perform this coming season or he might very well find himself out of a job and when we mean perform anything less than 7 wins and we have to think the Kalani Sitake experiment will come to an end in Provo in early December.
6. Jim Harbaugh, Michigan – There were a few Coaches Hot Seat members on hand when Jim Harbaugh was introduced as the Stanford head coach in December 2007 and we were able to spend enough time around Jim during his FOUR years on The Farm and overall we were impressed with Harbaugh and we were not surprised at all when he went on to be very successful at the San Francisco 49ers.
We were surprised in September 2013 when Jim Harbaugh didn’t immediately make inactive 49ers defensive end Aldon Smith after he received an early morning DUI letting Smith play in a game on Sunday just days after that DUI and in our opinion the 49ers letting Smith play in that game was the beginning of the downfall of Jim Harbaugh in San Francisco and to some extent also in our opinion Harbaugh’s coaching at the 49ers and at Michigan has not been at the level it was at Stanford and before the Smith DUI with the 49ers.
The above was our opinion before the 2017 season began and after watching Michigan in every game it played this past season what we are beginning to wonder is…
What exactly is wrong with Jim Harbaugh?
Does Jim have some kind of health issue?
If it’s not a health issue then…what exactly is wrong with Jim Harbaugh because the Jim Harbaugh we see on the Michigan sideline and the one we are hearing about from our contact in Ann Arbor is not the Jim Harbaugh we know nor does the Michigan football team now reflect the Harbaugh we knew at Stanford.
Beyond all of the above let’s take a hard look at just what Jim Harbaugh has accomplished at Michigan in THREE seasons:
Overall Record: 28 – 11
Big Ten: 18 – 8
Also in THREE seasons Jim Harbaugh + Michigan have played 22 FBS teams that finished the season with .500 or better records and Harbaugh’s record in those 22 games is…
10 – 12
Sorry….the above kind of record is not what the folks at Michigan are paying Jim Harbaugh Millions of Dollars a year and spending Many, Many Millions of Dollars for assistant coaches, support staff, facility upgrades and all manner of other things like flying the entire Damn team to Florida and Europe for spring practice!
So what’s wrong with Michigan Football assuming there isn’t something wrong with Jim Harbaugh health wise?
Well for starters the Michigan Offense is…
The Most Predictable Offense in College Football
…on ANY level of the college game and that is beyond Michigan also having…
Some of the Most Pitiful Quarterback Play
…we have EVER seen at a school like Michigan and it’s almost as if…
Jim Harbaugh and the Michigan Offensive Coaches aren’t actually coaching the team in practice but are going out and getting drunk at a local Ann Arbor bar
….and maybe Jim Harbaugh and the Michigan Offensive Coaches should go get drunk at a local Ann Arbor bar because what they did last season was a…
Total and Complete Joke!
We don’t know a whole lot of Michigan alumni but we do know one who could buy and sell Nick Saban in about 10 minutes and we asked him what would happen to Jim Harbaugh if he went 8 – 4 again in 2018 and his response was….
“Jim will be fired.”
When we told that same Michigan alum that Harbaugh was 10 – 12 against FBS teams with .500 or better records in the last 3 seasons he said…
“Maybe we should fire Jim right now!”
Memo to Jim Harbaugh: Get off your Damn Ass now Son or your head coaching career will be OVER…at least on the college level…a year from today!
7. Ed Orgeron, LSU – If you are going to fire Les Miles at LSU and in our opinion Miles was given way too much time to get things straightened out then you better Damn hire a coach who will do better than Les Miles and Coach O in his first full season as the head coach of the Tigers posted a record of…
9 – 4
…and in Les Miles’ 11 full seasons as the head coach of LSU he only lost 4 or more games…
….and if Ed Oregon loses 4 games again in 2018 he is going to one of the Hottest Seats in College Football and the Tigers fans are going to be IRATE especially after the moving around of coaches in the offensive coordinator position which was the same side of the football that Les Miles had so much trouble with and which in the end got Les Miles fired…and will get Coach O fired as well!
For what it’s worth our longtime LSU alum friend who lives in New Orleans and was deadly accurate in predicting Les Miles demise in Baton Rouge told us recently….
“If Ed doesn’t get things rolling in ’18 and Mike Norvell has another big season at Memphis I fully expect for some big alumni and boosters to demand that LSU hire Norvell and end the madness in Baton Rouge.”
4 or more losses by LSU in 2018…Hell…maybe even 3 losses…and Mike Norvell might be the head coach at LSU a year from today!
8. Major Applewhite, Houston – We haven’t a clue if Major Applewhite believes that he had to hire Kendall Briles and Randy Clements to get the Houston football program rolling again BUT we do know that if Applewhite doesn’t come very close to winning if not outright winning 10 games in 2018 the Major Applewhite experiment at Houston will be over a year from today and we have heard from a UH alum that he wouldn’t be surprised if the school went after Lane Kiffin in a BIG way which wouldn’t surprise us either since the folks at Houston…expect their football team to win a Helluva lot football games now!
Would we have hired Kendall Briles at FAU or Houston?
Not A Chance In Hell…but that’s just us!
9. Larry Fedora, North Carolina – We haven’t a clue what caused North Carolina football t0 fall from a 11 – 3 record in 2015 and 8 – 5 record in 2016 to a 3 – 9 record in 2017 but beyond the 3 wins when we got to see the Tar Heels play last season…
The Team Looked Like It Was Hardly Coached At All
….and that makes perfect sense since when one realizes those 3 wins were over…
We don’t have a Damn Clue what happened to North Carolina football last year besides the Tar Heels giving up a Helluva lot of points finishing…
99th in Total Defense
…out of 129 FBS teams and either Fedora will get his Defense and Football Team straightened out and win 6+ games in 2018 or Fedora will have a Heluva lot of time on his hands come this time next year!
10. Dana Holgorsen, West Virginia – This isn’t Crazy Dana Holgorsen’s first trip to the Coaches Hot Seat Rodeo and after posting a 7 – 6 record in 2018 which has left Holgo’s records at West Virginia in 6 seasons in Big 12 at…
Overall: 43 – 34
Big 12: 27 – 27
…one has to think the folks in Great State of West Virginia are not going to tolerate the Mediocrity of averaging winning…
7.16 Games A Season
….so 2018 may indeed be Holgo’s Little Bighorn so keep an eye out on the horizon Holgo for campfires because you should see plenty of smoke Son!