Author Archive: Harry

20 College Football Head Coaches Facing CANNOT LOSE Games In Week EIGHT – “They got a name for the winners in the world….I want a name when I lose…they call Alabama the Crimson Tide….call me Deacon Blues…Deacon Blues.”


“They got a name for the winners in the world….I want a name when I lose…they call Alabama the Crimson Tide….call me Deacon Blues…Deacon Blues.”

Enjoy the GREAT Steely Dan performing Deacon Blues!


1.  Gus Malzahn, Auburn vs. Arkansas – It’s not like anyone here at Coaches Hot Seat needs to tell anyone that Gus Malzahn is facing yet another critical game in his coaching career at Auburn with the Tigers traveling to Fayetteville to play Arkansas on Saturday but consider this for a moment:

If Auburn loses to Arkansas to drop to…

4 – 3 overall

1 – 3 in SEC play

….they will still have to play games against…

Ole Miss
At Texas A&M

….and fight like Hell just to get bowl eligible in a season when many in the media that clearly didn’t know their Asses from the Side of a Barn had Auburn in the 4-Team College Football Playoff!

Even worse with a loss to Arkansas Gus Malzahn’s record in SEC play over the last 6 games dating back to 2014 will then stand at…

1 – 5

….with Ole Miss, Texas A&M, Georgia and Alabama still to play. Could Auburn really end up with a record of….

1 – 9

…in its last 10 SEC Conference games after the Iron Bowl on November 28?

Yes…and that reality must scare the Hell out of Gus Malzahn, Auburn AD Jay Jacobs and the other folks at and around Auburn University that will spend somewhere around…

$50 Million Dollars on Auburn Football in 2015

….and the Tigers might not even make it to a bowl game which only requires a beyond pitiful 6 – 6 record?

Sorry…with 3 Cupcake games and $50 Million Dollars being spent if you can’t find 3 more wins out of the remaining 6 football games then not only should the head coach be fired the athletic director should be sent packing as well because that is an outrage beyond an outrage in every sense of the world outrage!

Good Luck against Arkansas Gus!


2.  Bret Bielema, Arkansas vs. Auburn – A question that is impossible for us to answer or for anyone else to answer in our humble opinion is:

Is Bret Bielema a Good Football Coach?

Not….Is Bret Bielema a Great Football Coach BUT rather just is Bret Bielema a Good Football Coach because Bielema’s time at Wisconsin is very warped from what former Badgers head coach and now AD Barry Alvarez established at the school but we will give Bielema the benefit of the doubt and say he was a…

Close to Being A Good Football Coach at Wisconsin

…but then could Paul Chryst also have put-up the same kinds of records at Wisconsin following Barry Alvarez that Bret Bielema did in seven seasons as the head coach which were….

Overall:  68 – 24

Big Ten:  37 – 19

Yes…in our opinion Paul Chryst or any Average-to-Good Coach could have done what Bret Bielema did at Wisconsin which brings us to what Bret Bielema has done at Arkansas now in his third season on the job:

Overall:  12 – 19

SEC:  3 – 16

Damn….Bret Bielema’s 3 – 16 in SEC Conference play really does stand out as being Very Damn Bad and just to understand how Very Damn Bad Bielema’s SEC record is at Arkansas in 1998 Houston Nutt took over an Arkansas football program from Danny Ford that was coming off two-straight losing seasons….not just one losing season that Bielema inherited from John L. Smith…and in his first three years on the job Houston Nutt posted an SEC Conference record of…

13 – 11

…and took Arkansas to bowl games in his first six seasons on the job.


Do you think it’s Very Damn Important for Bret Bielema to beat Auburn on Saturday and find three more wins out of their remaining five games?

UT Martin
At Ole Miss
Mississippi State

You bet your ass it’s important because we cannot imagine ANY excuse that would make any Damn sense at all for why a head coach at Arkansas didn’t post at least a 6 – 6 record in his third year on the job unless that head coach was just flat-out…

Not A Very Good Coach.


3.  Charlie Strong, Texas vs. Kansas State – During this past bye week for Texas a Coaches Hot Seat member made a call down to Austin, Texas to one of his Texas-alum hunting and fishing buddies and asked what was the feeling on Charlie Strong among the “money folk at Texas” and this Texas-alum said straight-out:

“I don’t think Charlie’s going to make if it we don’t go to a bowl game this season.”

What the Hell does that mean the Coaches Hot Seat member asked….

“Exactly what the Hell you think it means! If Texas doesn’t get six wins this season and there is an established or even a hot young coach out there that we can get we will probably have a new head football coach before the New Year.”


With the above in mind let’s look at the current situation with Texas football:

Texas is now 2 – 4 on the season and they have left games against…

Kansas State
At Iowa State
At West Virginia
Texas Tech
At Baylor

In our opinion if Texas beats Kansas State at home on Saturday they will be 5 – 4 when they head to Morgantown on November 14 and if we were Charlie Strong we sure the Hell would want to win that game against West Virginia to get to 6 wins and not have to win one of those last two home games against Texas Tech or Baylor to keep my Damn job!

Coach ‘Em Up Charlie and play like Men Possessed Texas Longhorns!


4.  Kevin Sumlin, Texas A&M vs. Ole Miss – As we have written about in the Coaches Hot Seat Blog for years one of the original 7 founders of Coaches Hot Seat that we call the….

Balboa Café 7

….based upon the 7 Coaches Hot Seat members that met in a bar in the Marina District of San Francisco where the Coaches Hot Seat website was dreamed-up in the Fall of 2006 to get then Stanford head coach Walt Harris’ Sorry Ass run off The Farm has Texas A&M Aggie relatives that live in the Houston, Texas area and those Aggies have been Very Damn Accurate in predicting when head coaches at A&M would get their asses run out of College Station and after A&M’s loss to Alabama that Coaches Hot Seat member with Aggie connections called down to Houston and here is how that conversation went:

Coaches Hot Seat: “Hey there. How are things in Houston?”

Aggie Alum: “They suck but then what the Hell would you expect with oil below $50 dollars a barrel!”

Coaches Hot Seat: “That’s too bad. We read the other day that University of Oklahoma president David Boren prays for higher oil prices so the Oklahoma economy will do better and thus more dollars will flow to Norman.”

Aggie Alum: “When you talk to David next time tell him to say a prayer for Texas also!”

Coaches Hot Seat: “Will do although Senator Boren doesn’t take our calls anymore! Hey, after that Alabama beatdown of the Aggies what’s the state of A&M football?”

Aggie Alum: “Hell, Aggie football is a Damn mess! We give Sumlin a F-ing Palace to play football in and his team looks about half-prepared against Alabama and he gets its ass run out of that Damn Palace and now we are headed to play Ole Miss and Damn if I know what will happen this week now!”

Coaches Hot Seat: “So at what point does Kevin Sumlin get on the wrong side of the right people and given a big check and told to go find something else to do with the rest of his life on this Earth?”

Aggie Alum: “Hell, I looked last night and Sumlin is 15 – 12 in SEC play since he got here and if the Aggies lose to Ole Miss I would recommend Sumlin win out the rest of his games this season or at worst lose only to LSU or a few folks might be asked to write a big check come December but then this is Texas so what’s a few million dollars to get rid of a football coach that can’t get the Aggies to the SEC Title Game?”

Coaches Hot Seat: “So let’s see here…A&M is 5 – 1 right now and they have left at Ole Miss, South Carolina, Auburn, Western Carolina, at Vanderbilt, and at LSU. 2 more losses would be a 9 – 3 record overall and 5 – 3 in SEC play…that’s not too bad.”

Aggie Alum: “Sure that’s fine for Houston but Houston doesn’t play in a $500 Million Dollar brand Damn new football stadium and 5 – 3 in conference play is just not going to cut it around these parts anymore.”

Coaches Hot Seat: “What if A&M stumbled three more times in SEC play this season and finished at 4 – 4 in the SEC and 8 – 4 overall….where would that leave Sumlin?”

Aggie Alum: “That would leave Kevin Sumlin without a job on Christmas Day although he would have one big shit-pot full of money to soothe his sorrows over the Holidays!”

Memo to Kevin Sumlin: Don’t lose at Ole Miss son. Signed: Coaches Hot Seat


5.  Hugh Freeze, Ole Miss vs. Texas A&M – Like with Mark Richt it’s impossible for us to dislike Hugh Freeze although we do get a kick out of both Mark Richt and Hugh Freeze making comments over the years about how “God might have a role in the outcome of a football game” when it’s the firm opinion of the physics majors here at Coaches Hot Seat that the God that spun up this huge Universe has a lot of other things to worry about than if Georgia or Ole Miss wins a football game!

One thing that did catch our eye this past week that was said by Hugh Freeze which we hear all the time from coaches in the aftermath of losses which is the “didn’t execute” thing and below is a Hugh Freeze quote in a press conference after his team’s loss to Memphis:

“On what the team needs to do…
“Defensively, I have evaluated every one of them. It is very frustrating. Like I’ve told our coaching staff, it really doesn’t matter what you know, it matters what your kids know. Over five different occasions we had the perfect call and the play didn’t get made. We need to continue to see if we are not communicating it effectively, or what is causing the problem. We have to continue to work. There are times the other team gets you. Paxton Lynch is a good quarterback and he made some very good plays in that game that we had not seen. When you do have the right call, you need to get off the field. Offensively, we need to continue to work on what we think we can do and stay on those things.””

In essence Hugh Freeze is right in saying that he and his coaches need to learn how to better communicate to the Ole Miss football team so that when something like this happens…

“Over five different occasions we had the perfect call and the play didn’t get made.”

…but then as the Great Bill Walsh said one time if he said it a thousand times something to the effect of:

“Hell, the playcall is meaningless if the team can’t execute it properly.”


Translation: The playcall is meaningless and has Very Damn Little to do with winning football games because it’s not a play, or a scheme, or a formation, or some kind of trick that wins football games but rather how well the players execute on the field of play and in our opinion watching Ole Miss play Florida and Memphis…

Hugh Freeze has done a Piss-Poor job of getting his football team ready to play their last two games and we rather doubt that Freeze will have his team ready to play Texas A&M on Saturday.

After the loss to Memphis the Rebels are now 5 – 2 on the season with games left against…

Texas A&M
At Auburn
At Mississippi State

Memo to Hugh Freeze: If you lose to Texas A&M your ass is going on the Hot Seat and if your team plays the rest of the 2015 season the way your team played against Florida and Memphis your team will be lucky to win 2 more ballgames and if Ole Miss finishes at 7 – 5 with all the talent on this 2015 Rebels squad YOU Hugh Freeze are going to find out what your ass being on the Hot Seat feels like for the Entire Damn Offseason and also heading into the 2016 college football season!

Don’t lose to Texas A&M Hugh Freeze or it will be the Hot Seat for your ass son!

Bob Stoops

6.  Bob Stoops, Oklahoma vs. Texas Tech –With a win over Texas Tech on Saturday and with Kansas and Iowa State up next Bob Stoops Oklahoma football team has a chance to be…

8 – 1

….when they travel to Waco to play Baylor on November 14 but then the Sooners actually have to…

Show up and play against Texas Tech like they actually give a Damn about playing football for the University of Oklahoma

….which has not been a regular occurrence for the Sooners in recent years under Bob Stoops in our opinion and why every Damn game should scare the Hell out of fans of OU football since you never know when…

Little Game Bob Stoops


Big Choke Bob Stoops

….will rear its ugly head!

Our guess….Oklahoma will slop around and barely beat Texas Tech on Saturday….beat Iowa State and Kansas (Big Whoop!)….and then the Sooners will get its ass run and lose their last three games of the season to Baylor, TCU and Oklahoma State to finish at….

8 – 4

…on the year which is exactly what….

Larry Harmon

…could have finished coaching the Oklahoma Sooners in 2015…8 and Freaking 4!


7.  George O’Leary, UCF vs. Houston – Sometimes you just have to laugh at the Complete Damn Stupidity of college head coaches like this one from UCF head coach George O’Leary….

UCF coach George O’Leary says he won’t release his contract to public, Orlando Sentinel

….like what George O’Leary’s precious ass makes coaching some backwater university in central Florida matters but then this is the same George O’Leary who was hired by Notre Dame but never Damn coached a football game for the Irish because he was LYING on his resume so if the…

Total Piece of Shit George O’Leary is Too Much of A Coward

…to release his contract when he works for a public university funded by state taxpayers where a football team would not exist except for the University of Central Florida existing as a public institution of higher learning then one has to wonder what one can get away with in Florida but then a few Coaches Hot Seat members lived in Florida while serving in the US Navy and there is NOT an amount of money on this Earth that could get us to live in the Sunshine State again!

Getting back to Super Secret George O’Leary whose football team is now sitting on a record of 0 – 7 and still has to play…

At Cincinnati
At Tulsa
East Carolina
South Florida

…here’s to hoping that Super Secret George O’Leary’s football team loses ALL of its remaining five football games and put-up a BIG O-FER on the board for 2015 which is then followed by someone at UCF coming to their senses and firing George O’Leary’s Sorry Ass in late November!

8.  Mike Riley, Nebraska vs. Northwestern – A very good case could be made that if Mike Riley was just a slightly better football coach the Huskers would be…

7 – 0

…right now instead of 3 – 4 but then we learned a Helluva long time ago that the differences between….

A Bad…An Average…A Good…A Very Good…and A Great Football Coach

…are often very tiny but also very discernible at the same time and our opinion of Mike Riley during his two stints at Oregon State having seen Riley coach from the stands, from luxury suites, from press boxes and from the sideline that Riley is somewhere between….

An Average and A Good Football Coach

….and thus in many ways Nebraska at 3 – 4 right now is what An Average to A Good Football Coach would be after 7 games playing Nebraska’s schedule this season.

Up next for Nebraska….a game against a Northwestern team that is a Total and Complete Freefall that seems to have not blocked anyone since the win against Stanford in the opening week of the season and also looks to us to be on the verge of…

Quitting Completely on Pat Fitzgerald

…and if Northwestern does lie down and quit against Nebraska on Saturday Pat Fitzgerald will find his precious ass with his QUITTING football team right back on the Hot Seat!

PaulRhoads83883 (1)

9.  Paul Rhoads, Iowa State vs. Baylor – Hell, who are we kidding…Iowa State CANNOT beat Baylor in Waco or Baylor in other place on the Earth for that matter so that means the Cyclones will be 2 – 5 on Saturday night with the Texas Longhorns coming to their place on Halloween!

Coach Hard Paul Rhoads….Coach Very Damn Hard Son Because You Have Nothing To Lose!


10.  Al Golden, Miami vs. Clemson – F. Scott Fitzgerald of Great Gatsby fame once said that…

“There are no second acts in American life.”

….but Miami head coach Al Golden has a GOLDEN opportunity on Saturday with a home game against Clemson to FLIP the current consensus that his time at Miami has been a HUGE FLOP with win over the Tigers and Hell we see No Damn Reason why the Hurricanes don’t come out and play like Hell against Clemson since Al Golden and Miami have nothing to lose!

The latest we are hearing from South Florida: It’s ACC Coastal Division Champs or BUST for Al Golden at Miami so YES that means Clemson is a CANNOT LOSE game for the Hurricanes and Al!

11.  Mike MacIntyre, Colorado vs. Oregon State –In three seasons as the head coach at Colorado Mike MacIntyre has posted a record in Pac-12 Conference play of…

1 – 20

….and either Mike MacIntyre will start winning some Pac-12 football games or Colorado will find itself a new head football coach…..PERIOD.

With what games Colorado has left on its schedule…

At Oregon State
At Washington State
At Utah

….Oregon State looks like CU’s best chance to get a win in Pac-12 play this season which is a STUNNING thing to write as one realizes just how far Colorado football has fallen in recent years which has been a Helluva long fall!

12.  Paul Johnson, Georgia Tech vs. FSU – If Georgia Tech loses to Florida State on Saturday the Yellow Jackets will fall to 2 – 6 on the season and still will have to play games against…

At Virginia
Virginia Tech
At Miami

….and face the very REAL possibility that they will not go to a bowl game in 2015! From semi-favorites to win the ACC Conference in 2015 to not making a bowl game…Hell…that sounds like Auburn!

13.  Derek Mason, Vanderbilt vs. Missouri – In his second season as the head coach at Vanderbilt Derek Mason has posted a record in SEC Conference play of…

0 – 11

….after taking over a Vandy team that under previous head coach James Franklin posted SEC records over three seasons of…

2 – 6
5 – 3
4 – 4

Overall SEC: 11 – 13

….which means Bottom-Line Derek Mason better Damn start winning some SEC games starting with a home game this Saturday against Missouri!

Come on Derek Mason…you can win this Damn football game!


14.  Mike London, Virginia vs. North Carolina – Even after a great win in overtime against Syracuse in Week 7 Mike London and Virginia have to get right back at in Week 8 with a tough game on the road against North Carolina which for Damn sure is a…..


…because a loss in this spot would drop the Cavs to 2 – 5 on the season in a season when it’s…

Get to. 500-plus and a bowl game or bust for Mike London!

Good Luck against the Tar Heels Mike!


15.  Frank Beamer, Virginia Tech vs. Duke – We just laugh at people when we hear them say things like….

“X Coach has the right to coach at Y School for as long as he wants because of…”

…..what…something he did in the past?

Please….in the REAL World employers don’t give TWO RIPS what you did a decade ago, a year ago or yesterday for that matter because the Only Damn Thing that matter is what you are doing…


…and RIGHT NOW Frank Beamer’s Hokies are sitting on a record of….

3 – 4

…and have to play a very tough team in Duke on Saturday in Blacksburg. A loss to Duke would drop Va. Tech to 3 – 5 and we don’t see a chance in Hell that the Hokies would win 3 of their last 4 games against…

At Boston College
At Georgia Tech
North Carolina
At Virginia

….to get to 6 wins in 2015 and can Frank Beamer survive a losing season to return to coach Va. Tech in 2016?

If he can then we will know for sure…..Virginia Tech does not exist in the REAL WORLD!

16.  Kevin Wilson, Indiana vs. Michigan State – Yes….the Indiana Hoosiers can beat what is a very vulnerable and what looks like to us very AVERAGE Michigan State team on Saturday especially if the Hoosiers can hang 40-plus points on the Spartans especially since MSU hasn’t scored 40-plus points this season.

Yes…for Kevin Wilson and the 4 – 3 Indiana Hoosiers Michigan State is certainly a…



17.  Butch Jones, Tennessee vs. Alabama – Not that we give Tennessee much chance to beat Alabama on Saturday in Tuscaloosa, but for Damn sure the Vols are roughly equal to Arkansas and not that far behind Ole Miss and those two teams didn’t do too badly in T-Town this season so maybe Tennessee can put a scare in Bama…and maybe they can’t….so that makes this Alabama game not much a…


…but rather a…

Hell…We Would Love To Win This Game over Bama…Game

…for Butch Jones and his Tennessee football team.


Memo to Butch Jones:  A couple of decades ago two Coaches Hot Seat members were in a US Navy surface warfare training class on how the US Navy surface fleet would fight the Soviets if a war broke out (this was before the Berlin Wall came down in November 1989) and what the US Navy taught us was that Soviets were very regimented and very by the book in how they went about doing things and that the best way to defeat them was to surprise them by doing things that were not only unexpected but also pissed them off in the process. Since the 2008 season forward at Alabama Nick Saban has lost 12 football games and in each of those games the opposing coach and team did things that make Nick Saban and his football team very uncomfortable….as opposed to Mark Richt who makes it as easy as Hell on Saban and Bama…..and that is the way you beat Nick Saban and Alabama:

You make Nick Saban and Alabama uncomfortable

You piss Nick Saban and Alabama off

Nick Saban and then his football team get tight and they start making mistakes

You beat Nick Saban and Alabama

At the end of one of our surface warfare training sessions a retired US Navy Captain who was the Commanding Officer of several ships during the Cold War came in for a question and answer period and someone asked this retired Captain how best to deal with the Soviets when coming into contact with them at sea and his response was:

“Soviet Navy commanding officers are taught that Americans are kind of crazy and that they will often do unpredictable things and even though they are taught that the unknown of just what crazy thing you might do as an opposing commanding officer scares them the most and that unpredictability is what makes the American warriors such a Helluva tough adversary to beat. Scare the Hell out of Soviets and keep them off balance…that’s what you should do when you come into contact with Soviets at sea.”

Scare the Hell out of Nick Saban and Alabama Butch Jones if you want to beat the Tide in Tuscaloosa!


18.  Nick Saban, Alabama vs. Tennessee – No….Tennessee is not a CANNOT LOSE Game for Nick Saban and Alabama BUT on a related note we here at Coaches Hot Seat keep our eyes and ears open and our contacts close meaning decision-makers across the game of football in America could be talking to someone that we have taken to lunch, or done a favor for, or are just good friends with and from our contacts we get LOTS of great information throughout the year with 99% of that info NEVER making it into the Coaches Hot Seat Blog but we will say in this spot on the subject of Nick Saban it’s our opinion here at Coaches Hot Seat:

There is a 50-50 chance at least this is Nick Saban’s last season at Alabama and that Saban will take an NFL job in December if the right team makes the right job offer at the right price with the below NFL teams being places that Saban would consider if the right job offer with the right price was made which is in our opinion something like….

Almost if not Total Control of Team and Front Office


$8 to $10 Million A Year for 7 Years

…and the NFL teams that could offer above to Saban in our opinion are:

Jacksonville Jaguars
Washington Redskins
Tennessee Titans
Indianapolis Colts
New York Giants
San Francisco 49ers
Los Angeles Rams
Detroit Lions
Cleveland Browns

In our opinion Nick Saban would consider working for the following NFL teams in order of preference based upon our best guess:

New York Giants
Tennessee Titans
Indianapolis Colts
Los Angeles Rams

Why would Nick Saban consider leaving a perfect situation at Alabama to coach in the NFL again?

Well…Hell…Saban has won THREE National Titles at Alabama and ONE National Title at LSU and no matter what happens at Alabama this season it’s our opinion that Nick Saban would like to hoist this trophy as well before he’s done coaching:

Lombardi Trophy Football

If we were Nick Saban we would take the New York Giants job over any of the above and then the Tennessee Titans next…and after that both the management and ownership get a little shaky for the Colts and Rams so some serious contract work would have to be done before we would either Indianapolis or Los Angeles.

Oh…and Good Luck against Tennessee on Saturday Nick!

Norm Chow

19.  Norm Chow, Hawaii vs. Nevada – In four seasons as the head coach at Hawaii Norm Chow has posted a record in Mountain West Conference play of…

4 – 23

…and a game at Nevada is a good of a place as any for the Warriors to start winning some MWC games under Norm Chow….right?



20.  Bobby Petrino, Louisville vs. Boston College – With the Complete Freaking Disaster that is now underway at Louisville with its basketball program one has to think that someone at Louisville must be thinking something like…

Maybe we shouldn’t have hired Bobby Petrino after that Arkansas incident

….but then maybe not but for Damn sure with the Cardinals football team now sitting at 2 – 4 on the season and still having to play games against….

Boston College
At Wake Forest
At Pitt
At Kentucky

…..a loss to BC on Saturday and Louisville will have a very hard time making it to a bowl game in Petrino’s second season back the second-time around.

YES…Boston College is a CANNOT LOSE Game for Bobby Petrino and Louisville!

Coaches Hot Seat Quotes of the Day – Friday, October 23, 2015 – General Robert Neyland



“General Neyland’s 7 Maxims

1. The team that makes the fewest mistakes will win.

2. Play for and make the breaks and when one comes your way – SCORE.

3. If at first the game – or the breaks – go against you, don’t let up… put on more steam.

4. Protect our kickers, our QB, our lead and our ball game.

5. Ball, oskie, cover, block, cut and slice, pursue and gang tackle… for this is the WINNING EDGE.

6. Press the kicking game. Here is where the breaks are made.

7. Carry the fight to our opponent and keep it there for 60 minutes.”


“You never know what a football player is made of until he plays Alabama”


“The team that makes the fewest mistakes wins”


“To defeat a weak opponent is not the problem: The problem is to win when he is as good or better than you”


“Gentlemen, touchdowns follow blocking as sure night follows day”


“If my teams win, my press will be good. If we lose, the press can’t help me anyhow.”


“People think I’m the greatest damn coach in the world,” said the great Bear Bryant, “but Neyland taught me everything I know.”

Wikipedia Page: General Robert Neyland

Coaches Hot Seat Quotes of the Day – Thursday, October 22, 2015 – Journey – Steve Perry



“There’s always a price for what you want.”  Steve Perry


“You can’t embrace your whole life if you’re shut down. I found out that I can’t just run away and shut down. I’m losing the rest of my life doing that.”  Steve Perry


“I’m no spring chicken. The same arthritis that ate up my left hip that finally got replaced hasn’t stopped there… And touring is a lot of work. I’m impressed when I see people like Eric Clapton out there. Gee whiz, Eric, give me a break! I know it’s gotta hurt somewhere.”  Steve Perry


“I’m so hard on myself. I play these sketches in my computer for friends and they say ‘Gee whiz, the vocal’s beautiful.’ I hear, ‘It needs to be better.'”  Steve Perry


“Just a small town girl
Livin’ in a lonely world
She took the midnight train goin’ anywhere

Just a city boy
Born and raised in south Detroit
He took the midnight train goin’ anywhere

A singer in a smoky room
A smell of wine and cheap perfume
For a smile they can share the night
It goes on and on and on and on

Strangers waiting
Up and down the boulevard
Their shadows searching in the night
Streetlight people
Living just to find emotion
Hiding somewhere in the night

Working hard to get my fill
Everybody wants a thrill
Payin’ anything to roll the dice just one more time

Some will win, some will lose
Some were born to sing the blues
Oh, the movie never ends
It goes on and on and on and on

Strangers waiting
Up and down the boulevard
Their shadows searching in the night
Streetlight people
Living just to find emotion
Hiding somewhere in the night

Don’t stop believin’
Hold on to that feelin’
Streetlight people

Don’t stop believin’

Hold on
Streetlight people

Don’t stop believin’
Hold on to that feelin’
Streetlight people”
Journey – Steve Perry, Don’t Stop Believing, 1981

Wikipedia Page:  Journey, Steve Perry

Post Week 7 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 21 – 30 Hot Seat Head Coaches – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell and Give It To Them Straight With the Bark On Johnny Cash


A chair on fire... metaphor "In The Hot Seat"

Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell and Give It To Them Straight With the Bark On Johnny Cash

Post Week 7 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

21.  Trent Miles, Georgia State – Trent Miles and Georgia State got a nice win on Saturday on the road against Ball State and now the Panthers get to live in the glow of their 2 – 4 record during a bye in Week 8 before they head to play Arkansas State on Halloween!

Uh – Oh….Arkansas State just beat La. Lafayette 37 – 27 so the Halloween road trip might not end in a win BUT Hell Georgia State got their first win of the year over a team not named New Mexico State so Congratulations to Trent Miles and Panthers and have a nice bye week and don’t give one Damn thought to your records at Georgia State Trent Miles because it’s time to be in your Happy Place!

Overall:  3 – 27

Sun Belt:  1 – 16

22.  Paul Petrino, Idaho – Paul Petrino got a win on the road against a rapidly imploding Troy football team under first year head coach Neal Brown and now it’s up to Petrino to keep the wins rolling in with a game against La. Monroe at home on Saturday in what is a…

Very Damn Winnable Game!

Idaho is now 2 – 4 on the season and still has to play these games…

La. Monroe
At New Mexico State
At South Alabama
Appalachian State
At Auburn
Texas State

Hell, the Vandals might be able to get to 4 wins in 2015 but then the Vandals might need 6 wins in 2015 to save Paul Petrino’s job!

Bob Stoops

23.  Bob Stoops, Oklahoma – In the wake of Oklahoma destroying Kansas State by a score of 55 – 0 on Saturday we here at Coaches Hot Seat and hundreds of thousands of fans of OU football must have been thinking something like:

“What in the Hell was that Bob Stoops? Your football team doesn’t show up against Texas BUT you do show up to play against Kansas State? What the Hell is your problem Stoops?”

It has been our opinion for years here at Coaches Hot Seat that Bob Stoops like his good buddy Steve Spurrier has become a Part-Time coach and not putting in the effort he did during his first TEN seasons on the job in Norman which ran from….

1999 season to the loss to Florida in the January 2009 BCS Title Game

…which means in our opinion Bob Stoops has been giving less than FULL EFFORT for 7 years now counting this season which saw Part-Time and Big Choke Bob Stoops strike again with the Sooners loss to a Very Damn Average Texas team in Dallas two weeks ago.

Oh, we have no doubt at all that if Oklahoma plays like they did against Kansas State the Sooners will be 9 – 2 when they travel to Stillwater for the Bedlam game against Oklahoma State on November 28 which has always been an impossible game for us to predict but then just imagine fans of OU football:

What IF…Oklahoma had played with FIRE against Texas and the Sooners were 6 – 0 and in the Top 5 right now?

Oh, don’t think about that for too long because you will be incredibly pissed-off and besides you better Damn be worried about which Oklahoma team will show up this week to play against Texas Tech….

The Unmotivated and Not Giving A Damn Sooners


The Playing Like Men Possessed Sooners?

Hell, we don’t have a clue to the answer to that question and THAT is the problem with Bob Stoops.


24.  Gus Malzahn, Auburn – With lots of people trying to explain just what in the Hell happened to the 2015 version of the Auburn Tigers in Gus Malzahn’s THIRD season as the head coach at AU we here at Coaches Hot Seat see the Tigers with a record of 4 – 2 on the season with their 3 wins over FBS wins coming over teams with a combined record of….

9 – 10

….and then 2 losses to LSU and Mississippi State.

In other words Auburn has beaten NO ONE in 2015 in the grand or lower than grand scheme of things and thus why it’s so Damn important for the Malzahn and the Tigers to beat an Arkansas team on Saturday that is sitting on a record of….

2 – 4

….which REALLY makes his a HUGE game for Gus Malzahn because a loss in this spot and it will be…


…with these games still on the slate after the Razorbacks:

Ole Miss
At Texas A&M

Damn….if Auburn loses to Arkansas they are looking right at records in 2015 of…

Overall:  5 – 7

SEC:  1 – 7

And just think who those 5 wins would have been over….

Louisville, Jacksonville State, San Jose State, Kentucky, Idaho

Hell…the bright side is Auburn could claim to be the Champion of Kentucky!


25.  Charlie Partridge, Florida Atlantic – Charlie Partridge is now in his SECOND season as the head coach at FAU and after the loss to Marshall on Saturday Charlie has records on the board of….

Overall:  4 – 14

CUSA:  3 – 8

…..and in our opinion here at Coaches Hot Seat it’s time for Charlie Partridge to start winning some Damn football games starting with Saturday’s game at UTEP.

Memo to Charlie Partridge:  TIME is EVERYTHING Charlie and TIME is now working against you so start winning some Damn football games and QUICK son!


26.  Paul Johnson, Georgia Tech – Consider the below FACT for a moment in the wake of Georgia Tech starting the 2015 college football season off with a record of 2 – 5 overall and 0 – 4 in ACC play:

Over the past SIX seasons Paul Johnson has posted an ACC Conference record of…

25 – 19

…..and there is a decent chance that Johnson’s ACC mark over the past SIX seasons will be hovering near the .500 mark when the Yellow Jackets play Georgia in Atlanta on November 28 with these games still left to play:

Florida State
At Virginia
Virginia Tech
At Miami

YES….there is at least a 50 – 50 chance that Georgia Tech does NOT go to a bowl game this year which would give Paul Johnson a 100% chance of finding his ass on the Hot Seat for the foreseeable future!


27.  Mark Helfrich, Oregon – Several Coaches Hot Seat members were at the Oregon – Washington game on Saturday night at Husky Stadium in Seattle and the most striking thing as we watched the Ducks sideline closely was how much of the swagger that used to radiate from the Oregon Ducks players is now GONE and in our opinion that swagger is GONE because Mark Helfrich just does not have the “It” and gravitas that Chip Kelly had when coaching the Ducks.

With the win over Oregon the Ducks are now at 4 – 3 on the season and still have to play games against…

At Arizona State
At Stanford
Oregon State

…and in our opinion IF Oregon loses to Arizona State a week from Thursday the Ducks have a tough time making it to a bowl game and if Oregon doesn’t go to a bowl game in 2015 Oregon will be looking for a new head football coach come December.

28.  Craig Bohl, Wyoming – Craig Bohl finally got his Wyoming football team off the mat on Saturday with a win over Nevada getting their FIRST win of the year and now it will be up to Bohl to keep the ball rolling this week in a tough game against what suddenly what looks like a very vulnerable Boise State team.

With these games left on the schedule….

At Boise State
At Utah State
Colorado State
At San Diego State

….we see no reason why the Cowboys don’t win at least THREE more games in 2015 so keep coaching up the Cowboys Craig Bohl!


29.  Mike Riley, Nebraska – Nebraska dominated a stumbling, bumbling Minnesota football team that now looks hardly coached at all and it will be up to Husker head coach Mike Riley to keep things moving forward with a Week 8 game at home against a Northwestern football team that now looks like it’s hardly coached at all and is falling to pieces after a 5 – 0 start to the season.

Mike Riley has ONE task for the 2015 season….making Damn sure that the now 3 – 4 Huskers get to a bowl game and with these games left to play…

At Purdue
Michigan State
At Rutgers

….if Nebraska can’t win 3 of their last 5 games then Mike Riley SHOULD be fired in December along with anyone else that thought hiring Mike Riley was a good idea in Lincoln, Nebraska!

30.  Derek Mason, Vanderbilt – Vanderbilt looks like an improved football team over 2014 in Derek Mason’s first year coaching the Commodores BUT with Vandy now 2 – 4 after their loss to the Spurrier-less South Carolina Gamecocks it will be up to Mason to find a couple more wins AT LEAST from the SIX games left on Vandy’s schedule:

At Houston
At Florida
Texas A&M
At Tennessee

YES…..Vanderbilt should win AT LEAST 4 Games in 2015 starting with a win over a Very Damn Average Missouri team on Saturday!

Come on Derek Mason….it’s time NOW to start winning some football games at Vanderbilt!

Coaches Hot Seat Quotes of the Day – Wednesday, October 21, 2015 – John D. Rockefeller



“A friendship founded on business is better than a business founded on friendship.”


“Don’t be afraid to give up the good to go for the great.”


“Every right implies a responsibility; Every opportunity, an obligation, Every possession, a duty.”


“Good leadership consists of showing average people how to do the work of superior people.”


“I always tried to turn every disaster into an opportunity.”


“I believe in the dignity of labor, whether with head or hand; that the world owes no man a living but that it owes every man an opportunity to make a living.”


“I can think of nothing less pleasurable than a life devoted to pleasure.”


“I do not think that there is any other quality so essential to success of any kind as the quality of perseverance. It overcomes almost everything, even nature.”


“I know of nothing more despicable and pathetic than a man who devotes all the hours of the waking day to the making of money for money’s sake.”


“If you want to succeed you should strike out on new paths, rather than travel the worn paths of accepted success.”


The person who starts out simply with the idea of getting rich won’t succeed; you must have a larger ambition.”


“God gave me my money. I believe the power to make money is a gift from God . to be developed and used to the best of our ability for the good of mankind. Having been endowed with the gift I possess, I believe it is my duty to make money and still more money and to use the money I make for the good of my fellow man according to the dictates of my conscience.”


“The way to make money is to buy when blood is running in the streets.”


“The only question with wealth is, what do you do with it?”


“Do you know the only thing that gives me pleasure? It’s to see my dividends coming in.”


“The ability to deal with people is as purchasable a commodity as sugar or coffee and I will pay more for that ability than for any other under the sun.”


“I would rather hire a man with enthusiasm, than a man who knows everything.”

Wikipedia Page:  John D. Rockefeller


Post Week 7 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 11 – 20 Hot Seat Head Coaches – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell and Give It To Them Straight With the Bark On Johnny Cash


A chair on fire... metaphor "In The Hot Seat"

Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell and Give It To Them Straight With the Bark On Johnny Cash

Post Week 7 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings


11.  Ron Turner, Florida International – With FIU’s loss to Middle Tennessee on Saturday the Golden Panthers record in 2015 dropped to 3 – 4 and Ron Turner’s records at FIU in his THIRD year on the job now stand at:

Overall:  8 – 23

CUSA:  5 – 14

Can Ron Turner survive to coach another year at FIU if his football team doesn’t win at least 3 more times out of the below remaining 5 football games to get to 6 wins overall?

Old Dominion
At Florida Atlantic
At Marshall
Western Kentucky

Our guess FIU finishes at 4 – 8 or 5 – 7 in 2015 and we don’t have a clue if that is good enough for Ron Turner to return to coach FIU in 2016 and frankly we don’t really care either!


12.  Mike London, Virginia – Mike London’s Virginia football team got a much-needed win in overtime against Syracuse on Saturday which raises the Cavs record to 2 – 4 on the season and now the CRITICAL question is can Virginia find the FOUR more wins that we believe Mike London will need to return to coach UVA in 2016?

What’s left on Virginia’s schedule:

At North Carolina
Georgia Tech
At Miami
At Louisville
Virginia Tech

Short answer = NO!

Long answer = Not A Chance In Hell!

Good Luck in Chapel Hill this Saturday Mike London because we are pulling for you son!


13.  Mike MacIntyre, Colorado – We believe a good measuring stick on a college football head coach is the following:

Is a team better today than it was when the head coach took over the team and if the answer to that question is YES how much better is the team?

Hell, if a football team is NO better after a couple of seasons under a new head coach more than likely that coach should be fired since a quality head coach will make dramatic and easily recognizable improvements within a few weeks or months of being on a college campus BUT over a couple of seasons a new head football coach better Damn be making his football team MUCH better or his ass will end up on the Hot Seat and eventually he will be fired….PERIOD!

As for Mike MacIntyre at Colorado our sense is that the CU Buffs football team is a little better than it was when MacIntyre took over before the 2013 season BUT we haven’t seen the improvement we were expecting from Mike and we will be interested to see if Colorado can do anything at all the rest of 2015 with the Buffs now sitting on a record of 3 – 4 and still having to play these games:

At Oregon State
At Washington State
At Utah

Our guess Colorado wins 1 or 2 more times in 2015 to finish at 4 – 8 or 5 – 7 with probably either record getting Mike MacIntyre one more season in Boulder BUT we see no Damn reason why the Buffs can’t win at least 3 of their remaining 6 games and finish at 6 – 7 after that opening season and totally Damn unacceptable loss to Hawaii.

Our recommendation to Mike MacIntyre: Beat a Very Average Oregon State team on Saturday son!


14.  Charlie Strong, Texas – No one ever has to worry where we stand here at Coaches Hot Seat because we give out our opinions with the “Bark On” and if we have a serious bias for or against a coach with two examples being…

Lane Kiffin = We Hate the Sorry Bastard

Charlie Strong = We Will Always Pull for Charlie Strong

….we tell everyone up-front and with that being said even with the win over Oklahoma the Texas Longhorns still have a lot of work to do because with a record of 2 – 4 and these games left to play…

Kansas State
At Iowa State
At West Virginia
Texas Tech
At Baylor

…there is a least a 50 – 50 chance that the Longhorns will NOT get to SIX wins in 2015 and that would nothing short of a….

Complete Freaking Disaster

….in Strong’s second year in Austin.

Up next….a very Damn important game for Texas to win over Kansas State on Saturday!


15.  Frank Beamer, Virginia Tech – With Virginia Tech’s loss to Miami on Saturday Frank Beamer’s record in ACC play over the last FOUR seasons has now dropped to….

13 – 14

….and if that will keep you employed in Blacksburg coaching-up the Hokies then where the Hell do we sign-up because our thinking is….

Bozo the Clown could coach Virginia Tech to a .500 record in ACC Conference play!

Larry Harmon

Up next for Frank Beamer and Virginia Tech…

A Better Damn NOT Lose Game at Home against David Cutcliffe and Duke!

Oh by the way…Virginia Tech is a 3 point favorite over Duke in this game so the Hokies really Better Damn NOT Lose This Game against the Blue Devils!

16.  Curtis Johnson, Tulane – With Tulane’s 42 – 7 loss to Houston on Friday night the Green Wave dropped to 2 – 4 on the season and head coach Curtis Johnson’s record in his FOURTH season at the school fell to….

Overall:  14 – 29

CUSA:  10 – 17

Damn…that’s NOT very good and one would have to think that Tulane will need to get 6 wins in Johnson’s FOURTH year at the school to get a FIFTH year coaching the Green Wave….right? Hell…we would think so but we sure the Hell don’t know for sure!

Let’s look at what Tulane has left on their schedule:

At Navy
At Memphis
At Army

Uhhhhh…there is NOT a chance in Hell that Tulane gets to 6 wins in 2015….in our humble opinion of course!


17.  Al Golden, Miami – Miami and Al Golden won their CANNOT LOSE Game to Virginia Tech on Saturday which raised the Hurricanes record to 4 – 2 on the season in a year when Al Golden will need…

9 or 10 wins AND a trip to ACC Championship Game

….to return to coach Miami in 2016 and here is what the Canes have left to play still….

At Duke
At North Carolina
Georgia Tech
At Pitt

Damn…that’s a pretty tough schedule that Miami still has to play and Al Golden is for Damn sure going to EARN that return to coach the Hurricanes in 2016!

Oh…Clemson is Very Damn Beatable and that the Tigers are only a 7 point favorite or so over Miami proves that point to which we can only say..

Give Clemson Hell Al Golden!


18.  Butch Jones, Tennessee – Very few people give Tennessee a chance to beat Alabama on Saturday and no doubt it will take the Crimson Tide being very careless with the football for the Vols to win in Tuscaloosa and with a loss to Bama Butch Jones and UT’s record will drop to…

3 – 4

….on the season with the below games still remaining to be played after Bama:

At Kentucky
South Carolina
North Texas
At Missouri

So if Tennessee loses to Alabama and then runs the table they will finish the season at….

8 – 4

…which is about what we had the Vols pegged at in 2015 BUT and it is a BIG BUT if Butch Jones had coached like a man possessed instead of a meekly Coward the Vols COULD be sitting on a record of…

6 – 0

…right now and headed to Tuscaloosa for a Top 10 match-up!

Let that be a lesson to all the young coaches out there….

Life is Short….Don’t Coach Like A Coward!

How many wins by the Vols in 2015 will it take to get Butch Jones off the Hot Seat?

7 Wins Minimum!

Memo to Butch Jones:  You are 15 point underdogs to Alabama in Tuscaloosa so you have Very Damn Little chance to win this game so why not cut Joshua Dobbs loose and see what the kid can do? Oh, and remember Butch…the very best way to beat a bully…was yesterday, is today and will ALWAYS be…Punch the Bully Right in the Mouth!


19.  Ron Caragher, San Jose State – In our opinion here at Coaches Hot Seat by your THIRD season as the head coach at San Jose State you should be winning…

7 or 8 Games Minimum

….and in Ron Caragher’s THIRD season coaching the Spartans he is now sitting on a record of 3 – 4 with these games still be played:

New Mexico
At Nevada
At Hawaii
Boise State

Hell, we see No Damn Reason why San Jose State doesn’t win FOUR of its last FIVE games starting with a win over New Mexico on Saturday!

Come on Ron Caragher….Get Off Your Ass Son or Get Your Ass Fired Son!


20.  Mark Richt, Georgia – We would like to write that the Georgia offense is sputtering because “Self-Appointed NFL Guru” Georgia offensive coordinator Brian Schottenheimer is running some complicated BS offense that Brian ran in the NFL which led to the TWO teams where he was the OC (New York Jets and St. Louis Rams) posting records over NINE seasons of….

71 – 72

….but the Georgia offense has been as VANILLA as a Mark Richt led offense can be in 2015 and it’s obvious to us here at Coaches Hot Seat that the Georgia coaches know they have very little in the QB position to work with and they are now in a Helluva spot with running back Nick Chubb out of action indefinitely.

Call us CRAZY but in a head coach’s 15 th season at a school like Georgia we would expect the Bulldogs to be loaded at the Quarterback position and not having to take-on transfers from a place like Virginia and for Damn sure Georgia should be winning the SEC East in 2015 especially considering the current state of Tennessee and South Carolina and with Florida having a first-year head coach on the sidelines! Instead Georgia is now 5 – 2 on the season and 3 – 2 in SEC play with these games left on the schedule:

Florida on Halloween in Jacksonville
At Auburn
Georgia Southern
At Georgia Tech

Our guess….Georgia loses to Florida, beats Kentucky, loses to Auburn, beats Georgia Southern…MAYBE….and then beats Georgia Tech to finish at…

8 – 4

If the above did happen that would mean Mark Richt’s record in SEC Conference play over the last THREE seasons would stand at…

15 – 9

….which would be a winning percentage of .625 which is good enough for Mark Richt to keep his job but not good enough to get Mark Richt off the Hot Seat BUT then we here at Coaches Hot Seat….

Have A Helluva LOT Higher Standard for Georgia Football than the Fans of Georgia Football and the People Making the Decisions at the University of Georgia Have for Georgia Football…in our humble opinion of course

….but then someone has to be MEDIOCRE Georgia fans…right?


Coaches Hot Seat Quotes of the Day – Tuesday, October 20, 2015 – Andrew Carnegie



“Aim for the highest.”


“All honor’s wounds are self-inflicted.”


“And while the law of competition may be sometimes hard for the individual, it is best for the race, because it ensures the survival of the fittest in every department.”


“Concentration is my motto – first honesty, then industry, then concentration.”


“Do not look for approval except for the consciousness of doing your best.”


“Do your duty and a little more and the future will take care of itself.”


“He that cannot reason is a fool. He that will not is a bigot. He that dare not is a slave.”


“I shall argue that strong men, conversely, know when to compromise and that all principles can be compromised to serve a greater principle.”


“Immense power is acquired by assuring yourself in your secret reveries that you were born to control affairs.”


“No man will make a great leader who wants to do it all himself or get all the credit for doing it.”


“People who are unable to motivate themselves must be content with mediocrity, no matter how impressive their other talents.”


“The average person puts only 25% of his energy and ability into his work. The world takes off its hat to those who put in more than 50% of their capacity, and stands on its head for those few and far between souls who devote 100%.”


“The man who acquires the ability to take full possession of his own mind may take possession of anything else to which he is justly entitled.”


“The men who have succeeded are men who have chosen one line and stuck to it.”


“There is little success where there is little laughter.”


“There is no class so pitiably wretched as that which possesses money and nothing else.”


“Think of yourself as on the threshold of unparalleled success. A whole, clear, glorious life lies before you. Achieve! Achieve!”


“You cannot push anyone up the ladder unless he is willing to climb.”


“You must capture and keep the heart of the original and supremely able man before his brain can do its best.”

Wikipedia:  Andrew Carnegie

10 Rules of Success Andrew Carnegie Used To Become Incredibly Rich, Richard Feloni, Business Insider

Jim Harbaugh AGAIN Shows He Has No Damn Common Sense – Steve Sarkisian and the Idiocy of the Modern Age – Post Week 7 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 1 – 10 Hot Seat Head Coaches


Jim Harbaugh AGAIN Shows He Has No Damn Common Sense


Fans of Michigan football got a taste of something on Saturday night with their new head football coach Jim Harbaugh what fans of Stanford football and now former fans of the San Francisco 49ers learned several years ago:

Jim Harbaugh has NO DAMN COMMON SENSE!

Let’s amend the above statement for the folks here at Coaches Hot Seat that have either been at or around Stanford University for over 40 years now….

Jim and his Daddy Jack Harbaugh have NO DAMN COMMON SENSE!

We can’t speak for John Harbaugh mind you BUT in our opinion Jim Harbaugh and his Daddy Jack Harbaugh have NO DAMN COMMON SENSE and that reality was on display for everyone to see at the end of the Michigan State – Michigan game on Saturday.

Let’s leave the Complete Idiocy of the Harbaugh’s Black and White view of EVERYTHING in a world that is nothing but Grays for as far as the eye can see for another day and get right to the point here which was the final play of the Michigan State – Michigan game which we will set-up by reminding everyone it was…

4 th down and 2 on the Michigan State 47 yard line

…and now quickly look at the below punt formation on the video understanding that Michigan State had NO ONE back to receive the punt and Michigan had Two Gunners in the formation with Michigan State rushing 10 men.

OK…let’s assume for a moment that Jim Harbaugh had….


…the obvious punt formation that Michigan should have been in was…

Max Protection

….but then someone that actually had…


…and one Damn iota of FOOTBALL SENSE would have of course done the following and which over a dozen Coaches Hot Seat members were screaming for Jim Harbaugh to do watching this game while tailgating near Husky Stadium in Seattle on Saturday before the Oregon – Washington game:

Michigan should have lined-up in a normal offense formation with perhaps two receivers as if about to run a running play with the QB under center and forced Michigan State to defend an offensive play on 4 th and two instead of a punt and then quickly shifted into a….


….formation with the QB dropping back several yards and then QUICK KICKING the football and the game would have been over!

Instead what did Jim Harbaugh who has NO DAMN COMMON SENSE do?

He gave Michigan State a chance to set-up a MAX punt rush overloaded to the right-side of the formation rushing a rugby punter who punts the ball on the move and who was already in motion when he DID NOT catch the ball properly which led to of course Michigan State picking-up the muffed snap and scoring the winning touchdown.

One also has to wonder did Jim Harbaugh or the Michigan special teams coach John Baxter tell their punter to just fall to the ground with the ball if he mishandled the snap?

Our guess probably not but then again Jim Harbaugh has…


….and Jimmy’s Idiocy tossed away the Michigan State game just like Jim Harbaugh’s Idiocy blew-up the San Francisco 49ers organization when he allowed then 49ers defensive end Aldon Smith to practice the same day that he got a DUI and then play in the next game before someone within the 49ers finally stepped-in and made Aldon Smith go to rehab to try and get his personal problems resolved taking the Idiotic decisions away from Jim Harbaugh on Aldon Smith for good which was a smart move considering that Jim Harbaugh has….


Jim Harbaugh is a very good football coach who is passionate about what he does for a living which we ALWAYS admire here at Coaches Hot Seat whether one is coaching football or doing anything else in their short life on this Earth BUT Jim Harbaugh’s view of the world in what are very stark Black and White terms blocks Harbaugh from seeing what is obvious to many others beyond just the dozen-plus Coaches Hot Seat members screaming at a television outside Husky Stadium on Saturday night a couple of thousand miles away from Ann Arbor, Michigan who were yelling….

“Quick Kick the Damn Ball Jimmy!”

Yes…it was just one loss that Jim Harbaugh and Jim Harbaugh alone cost the Michigan football program and all its fans on Saturday night BUT it was a loss that will live on long after Jim Harbaugh and we here at Coaches Hot Seat are gone from this Earth and with that in mind we can only say one thing to Jim…

THINK Jim….actually THINK….before you do something STUPID again!

Steve Sarkisian and the Idiocy of the Modern Age


When in Seattle the last few days on business and to attend the Oregon – Washington game on Saturday night at Husky Stadium a few Coaches Hot Seat members stayed with one of our long-time Washington-alum friends at his stunning and MASSIVE house in Medina, Washington which is just down the street from Bill Gates and less a mile from where former Washington and USC head coach Steve Sarkisian used to live when he was head coach of the Huskies.


A couple of years back we were sitting in our Washington-alum’s backyard which fronts beautiful Lake Washington and discussing then Washington head coach Steve Sarkisian who was in the middle of rebuilding the Huskies and was on his run of winning 7 games a year, after year, after year. After much discussion about some of the games that Washington should have won under Sarkisian our UW-alum friend stopped the entire conversation cold by saying some odd things about Steve Sarkisian’s drinking of alcohol and behavior and even wondered aloud if Sark should remain on as head coach at UW. Our Washington-alum friend then went into detail about exactly what he had heard from friends about what Steve Sarkisian had been up to around town including frequenting bars filled with college age students near the campus at the University of Washington and we remind everyone in this spot that Sarkisian was married and had three young children when he was the head coach at Washington and was doing these things our UW-alum friend was telling us about. The Coaches Hot Seat members sitting in that backyard that day looked at each other as our Washington-alum basically described a man out-of-control and one of us finally said:

“I just cannot believe it. A head coach at the University of Washington that has a wife and kids at home and is making Millions of Dollars a year is hanging out and getting drunk at college-age bars around the University of Washington? What kind of Damn sense does that make? No Damn sense is the answer to that question.”

Our Washington-alum friend then said something like:

“Well, it’s true and sooner or later Sarkisian’s behavior will cost him his job.”

As everyone now knows the LATER has arrived and our Washington-alum friend was exactly Damn right in what Steve Sarkisian was up to at Washington which the Los Angeles Times ferreted-out after doing some old-fashioned news reporting in the Seattle area with this story on Steve Sarkisian from last week:

Documents, former players point to Steve Sarkisian’s alcohol use at Washington, Nathan Fenno and Lindsey Thiry, Los Angeles Times

“Patrons and staff recognized Sarkisian at Seattle-area establishments such as The Ram near campus, Edgewater Hotel, 520 Bar and Grill, Roanoke Inn, Joey Bellevue as well as the Duchess. He was also said to be a frequent presence at two establishments that are now closed: Citrus and Joey Lake Union.

Two former Washington players said they encountered Sarkisian at the Edgewater on Seattle’s waterfront during a 2011 concert by local musician Tess Henley.

One of the players, who worked as a bartender at another establishment, said they bumped into Sarkisian and a team staffer in the packed bar. The player described the coach as “clearly … wasted.” The other player said Sarkisian hugged him, offered to buy him a drink and was “definitely drunk.”

The same player said Sarkisian drank “copious amounts of Patron” amounting to “between eight and 10 shots” over several hours during weekly visits to Citrus on Lake Union.”

Unbelievable….just Un-Damn Freaking Believable…which brings us to the Idiocy of the Modern Age with members of the media and lots of other people saying last week that people shouldn’t be hard on Steve Sarkisian because he had a “problem” that he was now dealing with which we can only respond to by saying:

When you have a wife and young children at home and you are the public face of the University of Washington football program and in many ways the public face of the University of Washington itself and you are frequenting and getting drunk in bars around UW and the Seattle area you don’t have a “problem” but rather you are…

A Sorry Damn Excuse for a Husband, Father and Football Coach

…who clearly on a regular if not daily basis CHOSE to go to college-age bars and drink like a Freaking Fish and in our opinion make a Damn fool of himself, his family and his employers at the University of Washington and Southern California who clearly placed way Damn too much trust and allowed to go on for too Damn long things that if they did know was going on…Shame on their asses….and if they did not know was going on…Double Damn Shame on their asses!

Yes…Steve Sarkisian has a PROBLEM and clearly LIED to himself and the world in his press conference after making a fool at himself at the Trojans event a few weeks back before the season when he said if he didn’t know if had drinking PROBLEM or not when in our opinion Sarkisian knew he had a PROBLEM and a Helluva lot of other people in and around USC knew Sarkisian had a PROBLEM.

Please….don’t tell us that Steve Sarkisian didn’t voluntarily drink like a Freaking Fish and frequent college age bars in Seattle while he was the head football coach at Washington and had a wife and three young children at home and for Damn sure don’t tell us that poor little Steve Sarkisian has a “problem” and thus everyone should just kiss Sarkisian’s ass because after all Sark has a “problem” and thus his Outrageous Actions as the Head Football Coach at Washington and USC can’t be judged which we are calling….

Bullshit On

…and saying in this spot that we wish Steve Sarkisian well BUT it is Steve Sarkisian’s selfishness and total stupidity that has gotten his ass into a rehab center…PERIOD.

YOU are the PROBLEM Steve Sarkisian and it’s YOU that bears responsibility for the PROBLEM not alcohol because it’s YOU that went to those bars and made a Damn fool of yourself as a father and the head football coach of TWO major universities!

Geez…in America in the early part of the 21 st Century you can say you have a “problem” and you can get away with Damn anything!


The other night a few Coaches Hot Seat members tried to remember the first-time that anyone here had met USC AD Pat Haden and we believe the earliest was when one CHS Member met Haden in one of his last two years in the NFL in 1980 or 1981 when Haden was playing quarterback for the Los Angeles Rams. In the intervening 25-plus years dozens of Coaches Hot Seat members have run into Pat Haden at hundreds of different events and football games over the years and beyond Pat being arrogant at times, an elitist at times, almost never wrong most of the time, and a bit of an ass at times, we really don’t have anything bad to say about Pat Haden…BUT…we are hoping Pat Haden is getting the necessary help right now in making what will be the BIGGEST decision in his time as AD at USC which is hiring the next head football coach at USC who better Damn be a GREAT one in every sense of the word GREAT!

A chair on fire... metaphor "In The Hot Seat"

OK…let’s get to the Post Week 7 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings and that means let’s bring on the GREAT Johnny Cash to give these Hot Seat Coaches Hell!

Post Week 7 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 1 – 10 Hot Seat Head Coaches


1.  Darrell Hazell, Purdue – With Purdue’s loss to Wisconsin on Saturday the Boilermakers dropped to 1 – 6 on the season and 0 – 3 in Big Ten play and head coach Darrell Hazell is going to need to start winning some games soon starting with a home game against Nebraska on Halloween after a bye week off.

In his THIRD season as the head coach at Purdue Darrell Hazell has posted records of…

Overall:  5 – 26

Big Ten:  1 – 18

….and if that’s good enough for the folks at Purdue then Fine and Dandy that is good enough for us at Coaches Hot Seat although Darrell Hazell still sits on the Hottest Seat in Major College Football!


2.  George O’Leary, UCF – The Total Disaster that has become UCF football continued its march forward on Saturday with UCF’s loss to a fast-improving Temple team and now the Knights are…

0 – 7

….on the season and still have to play:

At Cincinnati
At East Carolina

Got 0 – 12 for George O’Leary and his UCF football team in 2015?

YES….more than likely the UCF Knights will go 0 – 12 in 2015 and what is the lesson here?

If you want to be an athletic director… a Freaking athletic director.

If you want to be a head football coach then for Damn sure you also CANNOT be an athletic director nor would anyone with a working brain won’t to be a head football coach AND an athletic director!

PaulRhoads83883 (1)

3.  Paul Rhoads, Iowa State – Iowa State hung on for awhile against TCU but in the end lost to the Horned Frogs by a score of 45 – 21 and that leaves the Cyclones record at…

2 – 4

…on the season and Paul Rhaods’ ass on one of the Hottest Seats in the American Republic!

Iowa State still has to play this season games against….

At Baylor
At Oklahoma
Oklahoma State
At Kansas State
At West Virginia

….and we have been told by one of our good friend in the state of Iowa that anything short of 6 wins and Iowa State will be looking for a new head coach come December.

Good Luck against Baylor Paul Rhoads!

Oh by the way…Paul Rhoads took over the Iowa State football program starting in the 2009 season and in 2009 Baylor under second year coach Art Briles posted a record of 4 – 8 and in 2009 Iowa State beat Baylor by a score of..

24 – 10

…and if you are thinking like we are that since 2009 the Baylor football program went FORWARD and the Iowa State program has been STAGNANT or GONE BACKWARDS you and we here at Coaches Hot Seat think alike!


4.  Doug Martin, New Mexico State – Last week we reached out to a friend of ours who knows a very Damn good football coach who coaches a team below the FBS level and asked him to ask the coach if he would be interested in the New Mexico State head coaching job if it came open in the next few weeks and that coach’s response was:

“Maybe….if they would let me coach the team in the way I wanted to coach the team and I would need someone raising money like Hell in the athletic department helping me out.”

The lesson of the above comment in the wake of New Mexico State’s loss to Georgia Southern on Saturday by a score of 56 – 26 which dropped Doug Martin’s record at NMSU at….

4 – 26

…is that New Mexico State could hire Very Damn Good head football coach if it knew which coach to target either on a level below FBS or a strong assistant coach BUT we here at Coaches Hot Seat have to wonder:

Do the folks at New Mexico State realize what a valuable commodity they have in being one of the less than 130 FBS schools in America that plays football and do they have a clue who to target if they are going to be looking for a new head coach in the next several weeks?

In our opinion the answers to the above questions would be a….

NO…and another….NO!

Up next for Doug Martin and New Mexico State….


….which is a Very Damn Winnable Football Game!

Norm Chow

5.  Norm Chow, Hawaii – With Hawaii’s loss to New Mexico on Saturday the Warriors dropped to 2 – 5 on the season and head coach Norm Chow’s records at Hawaii now in his FOURTH year on the job stand at….

Overall:  10 – 34

MWC:  4 – 23

….and if that is good enough for the folks in The Islands then that is good enough for us BUT there are Helluva lot of young and aggressive football coaches that would LOVE to live in Hawaii and coach the Warriors like men possessed and one of those young and aggressive football coaches may just get a chance to do that come December if the Warriors keep losing football games under Norm Chow!

Up next for Hawaii….

At Nevada

….which just lost to Wyoming so Hell maybe the Warriors can win this game!


6.  Bret Bielema, Arkansas – With Arkansas having a bye in Week 7 one of our Arkansas buddies joined us in Seattle for the Oregon – Washington game for a few days and learned how the sophisticated-elitist set go about living their precious lives in the Great American Northwest and while sipping strong coffee and having way Damn too much fun we asked our Razorback buddy about the current state of Arkansas football and his response was:

“Oh, Hell it’s a Damn mess. Hell, the best case scenario is we beat Auburn, UT Martin, Mississippi State and Missouri at home to finish at 6 – 6 in Bielema’s THIRD year at Arkansas and Hell Petrino went 10 – 2 and took us to the Sugar Bowl in his THIRD year on the job! I mean if you go 6 – 6 in your third year on the job and you have the Mississippi schools getting better, A&M looking tough, LSU revitalized now, and Alabama and Auburn and you are not getting a Helluva lot better you will be left looking like you are standing still and I am afraid that is where Arkansas football is right now…it’s getting a little better but because the other SEC West teams are getting better at a faster rate Arkansas looks like it is going backwards.”

Damn….but then what IF Arkansas doesn’t get to SIX wins in 2015 with the Hogs now at 2 – 4 and these games left on the schedule?

UT Martin
At Ole Miss
Mississippi State

Damn indeed…but then what IF Arkansas finishes SEVENTH again in 2015 in the SEC West division which would be the THIRD straight year that Arkansas has finished SEVENTH in the SEC West division under Bielema?

Oh…these are dark times for Arkansas football which believe it or not over the past FOUR football seasons under John L. “Smile” Smith and Bret “I never saw a brisket I could pass up” Bielema is sitting on an SEC Conference record of…

5 – 22!

Damn Indeed!

Memo to Bret “Could you pass that spicy BBQ sauce please” Bielema:  Don’t lose to Auburn son if you know what’s good for you!

Signed: Coaches Hot Seat and an Arkansas alum from west Arkansas


7.  Kevin Wilson, Indiana – Consider this for a moment….

Indiana led Rutgers by the score of 52 – 27 with 5:25 left in the third quarter

….and the Hoosiers lost to Rutgers 55 – 52 on a last second field goal!


Memo to Kevin Wilson:  If you can’t protect a 25-point lead with 20 or so minutes left in the game son you have some Damn serious problems on your hands and Indiana has some Damn serious problems on its hands now at 4 – 3 on the season and headed to play Michigan State in East Lansing this coming Saturday.

With the loss to Rutgers Kevin Wilson’s record in Big Ten Conference play in his FIFTH season at the school dropped to….

6 – 29

….and now one really has to wonder…

How long can this losing continue for Kevin Wilson at Indiana?

Our guess: Anything less than 6 wins in 2015 and Kevin Wilson is DONE at Indiana come December and only needing 2 more wins and with these games left to play….

At Michigan State
At Maryland
At Purdue

….if Kevin Wilson cannot win at least 2 of the remaining 5 games above then he should be fired come December.


8.  Dana Holgorsen, West Virginia – The most troubling numbers for Dana Holgorsen’s tenure as the head coach of the West Virginia’s Mountaineers is….

11 – 19

…which is West Virginia’s record in Big 12 Conference play since WVU joined the Big 12 for the 2012 season. Maybe even worse considering all the Cupcakes that dominate the schedules of so many of the Power 5 teams in out-of-conference games is West Virginia’s overall record since joining the Big 12 in 2012:

21 – 23!


Let’s look at that again….Dana Holgorsen’s records since West Virginia joined the Big 12 in 2012:

Overall:  21 – 23

Big 12:  11 – 19

Yep…that EQUALS Hot Seat for Dana Holgorsen in every Damn sense of the worse EQUALS!

Up next for West Virginia which is now 3 – 3 on the season….

At TCU on Thursday October 29!

Damn…we have a feeling that Halloween 2015 is NOT going to be a very pleasant one for Dana Holgorsen in those hills and hollows of West Virginia!

Trick or Freaking Treat Dana?

We are thinking Trick for Damn sure!

Memo to the kids of Morgantown, Virginia:  If West Virginia loses to TCU on Thursday October 29 STAY FAR AWAY from Dana Holgorsen’s house on Halloween night!

9.  Todd Berry, La. Monroe – After La. Monroe 59 – 14 loss to Appalachian State on Saturday that is the Warhawks FOURTH straight loss and FIFTH loss overall in 2015 with ULM’s only win coming over FCS Nicholls State.

Todd Berry is now in his SIXTH season as the head coach at La. Monroe and is staring straight at a SECOND straight losing season at 1 – 5 on the season and with these games left to play….

At Idaho
At La. Lafayette
At Troy
Arkansas State
At Texas State
At Hawaii
New Mexico State

….and with only TWO home games left on the schedule finding five more wins in their last seven games isn’t going to be an easy thing to do.

Good Luck Todd!

10.  Chuck Martin, Miami (Ohio) – Chuck Martin is in his second season at Miami (Ohio) where he has posted records of….

Overall:  3 – 16

MAC:  2 – 9

…which is about what the previous Miami (Ohio) head coach Don Treadwell posted at the school in 2.5 years on the job…..

Overall:  8 – 21

MAC:  6 – 11

…..and thus we here at Coaches Hot Seat have to wonder:

What does it take to get a football coach at Miami (Ohio) that can win some football games?

Oh the Late Great Terry Hoeppner in SIX seasons coaching the Redhawks posted records of…

Overall:  48 – 25

MAC:  37 – 11

… indeed a head coach can win some football games at Miami (Ohio) but NOT Chuck Martin….as of yet!

Up next for Miami (Ohio)….

At Western Michigan!

Good Luck with that Chuck!

Coaches Hot Seat Quotes of the Day – Monday, October 19, 2015 – Albert Camus



“Don’t walk behind me; I may not lead. Don’t walk in front of me; I may not follow. Just walk beside me and be my friend.”


“Nothing is more despicable than respect based on fear.”


“The evil that is in the world almost always comes of ignorance, and good intentions may do as much harm as malevolence if they lack understanding.”


“But what is happiness except the simple harmony between a man and the life he leads?”


“Without culture, and the relative freedom it implies, society, even when perfect, is but a jungle. This is why any authentic creation is a gift to the future.”


“All great deeds and all great thoughts have a ridiculous beginning. Great works are often born on a street corner or in a restaurant’s revolving door.”


“Truth is mysterious, elusive, always to be conquered. Liberty is dangerous, as hard to live with as it is elating. We must march toward these two goals, painfully but resolutely, certain in advance of our failings on so long a road.”


“The absurd is the essential concept and the first truth.”


“The struggle itself towards the heights is enough to fill a man’s heart. One must imagine Sisyphus happy.”


“Those who lack the courage will always find a philosophy to justify it.”


“Real generosity toward the future lies in giving all to the present.”


“No cause justifies the deaths of innocent people.”


“Basically, at the very bottom of life, which seduces us all, there is only absurdity, and more absurdity. And maybe that’s what gives us our joy for living, because the only thing that can defeat absurdity is lucidity.”


“For if there is a sin against life, it consists perhaps not so much in despairing of life as in hoping for another life and in eluding the implacable grandeur of this life.”


“You will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consists of. You will never live if you are looking for the meaning of life.”


“Peace is the only battle worth waging.”


“There are causes worth dying for, but none worth killing for.”


“I know that man is capable of great deeds. But if he isn’t capable of great emotion, well, he leaves me cold.”


“The need to be right — the sign of a vulgar mind.”


“Seeking what is true is not seeking what is desirable.”


“People hasten to judge in order not to be judged themselves.”


“I would rather live my life as if there is a god and die to find out there isn’t, than live my life as if there isn’t and die to find out there is.”


“Life can be magnificent and overwhelming — that is the whole tragedy. Without beauty, love, or danger it would almost be easy to live. ”


“At the heart of all beauty lies something inhuman.”


“The evil that is in the world almost always comes from ignorance, and good intentions may do as much harm as malevolence if they lack understanding.”


“Freedom is nothing but a chance to be better.”


“There are crimes of passion and crimes of logic. The boundary between them is not clearly defined.”


“Where there is no hope, it is incumbent on us to invent it.”


“I rebel; therefore I exist.”


“Real generosity towards the future lies in giving all to the present.”


“Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal.”


“Beauty is unbearable, drives us to despair, offering us for a minute the glimpse of an eternity that we should like to stretch out over the whole of time.”


“In the midst of winter, I found there was, within me, an invincible summer. And that makes me happy. For it says that no matter how hard the world pushes against me, within me, there’s something stronger — something better, pushing right back.”


“There is scarcely any passion without struggle.”


“Should I kill myself, or have a cup of coffee?”


“But in the end one needs more courage to live than to kill himself.”


“Always go too far, because that’s where you’ll find the truth.”


“In order to understand the world, one has to turn away from it on occasion.”


“The truth is that everyone is bored, and devotes himself to cultivating habits.”


“He who despairs of the human condition is a coward, but he who has hope for it is a fool.”


“The habit of despair is worse than despair itself.”


“But what is happiness except the simple harmony between a man and the life he leads?”


“My chief occupation, despite appearances, has always been love.”


“If absolute truth belongs to anyone in this world, it certainly does not belong to the man or party that claims to possess it.”

Wikipedia:  Albert Camus

Coaches Hot Seat Quotes of the Day – Sunday, October 18, 2015 – Darrell Royal



“A boy shows how much he wants to play in the spring, when it’s tough, and during two a days, when it’s hot and tough. I don’t count on the boy who waits till October, when it’s cool and fun, then decides he wants to play. Maybe he’s better than three guys ahead of him, but I know those three won’t change their minds in the fourth quarter.”


“Breaks balance out. The sun don’t shine on the same ol’ dog’s rear end every day.”


“Football doesn’t build character. It eliminates the weak ones.”


“I learned this about coaching: You don’t have to explain victory and you can’t explain defeat.”


“Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity.”


“Once you cross the 50 you feel like an unsaddled horse.”


“Punt returns will kill you quicker than a minnow can swim a dipper.”


“You know, a football coach is nothing more than a teacher. You teach them the same subject, and you have a group of new guys every year.”


“You’ve got to think lucky. If you fall into a mudhole, check your back pocket – you might have caught a fish.”


“You’ve got to be in a position for luck to happen. Luck doesn’t go around looking for a stumblebum.”


“On game day, I am more nervous than a pig in a packing plant.”


“There’s an old saying, ‘You dance with who brung ya.’”


“Really, it was said about two-thirds in jest. Since we won the Arkansas and Notre Dame games with fourth-down and short-yardage passes, another image has arisen. I’ve been pictured as a man who takes chances. Two stinkin’ plays, and I’m a helluva gambler.”


“Some of them are so green you could hide ‘em on top of a lettuce leaf.”


“He could run like small-town gossip.”


“Ol’ Ugly is better than Ol’ Nothing.”


“They’re gonna come after us with their eyes pulled up like BBs.”


“There was a hornet’s nest waiting for us in Houston, and we were walking into it like Little Red Riding Hood with jam on her face.”


“Winning coaches must treat mistakes like copperheads in the bedclothes – avoid them with all the energy you can muster.”


“The best thing a coach can hope for is to please the majority. And the only way to please the majority is to win.”


“I’m pretty thin-skinned. When they say, ‘Do you want some constructive criticism?’ I say, ‘No.’”


“It’s an in-the-trench battle. It’s meat on meat, flesh on flesh and stink on stink. And that’s the only way you can play it.”


“Trends are bunk. Only angry people win football games.”


“We don’t want candy stripes on our uniforms. These are work clothes.”


“He’s as quick as a hiccup.”


“He doesn’t have a lot of speed, but maybe Elizabeth Taylor can’t sing.”


“I didn’t want to stay until I had used up all the enjoyment because that’s too long to stay anywhere.”


“If worms carried pistols, birds wouldn’t eat ’em.”

Wikipedia: Darrell Royal