Author Archive: Harry

10 College Football Head Coaches That CANNOT LOSE In Week 2 – Steely Dan Singing Deacon Blues – Bob Stoops and the “Hungry Meter” for College Football Head Coaches

Harry September 11, 2015 0 Comments

We are introducing a new feature at Coaches Hot Seat for the 2015 football season and beyond…the….

10 College Football Head Coaches That CANNOT LOSE In Week “X”

…..and to introduce this feature we will use a song from the 1970s Super Band Steely Dan…

Deacon Blues

“They got a name for the winners in the world….I want a name when I lose…they call Alabama the Crimson Tide….call me Deacon Blues…Deacon Blues.”

Enjoy the GREAT Steely Dan singing Deacon Blues!

10 College Football Head Coaches That CANNOT LOSE In Week 2

1. Kevin Wilson, Indiana vs. FIU – After the close 1-point win over FCS team Southern Illinois in Week 1 there is just no way in Hell that Kevin Wilson’s Hoosiers can lose to FIU at home this week because a loss in this spot to a pitiful team from South Florida…

No…not the Miami Hurricanes

…would send Wilson’s ass into a part of the Universe that is Hotter than our Sun and last time we checked the Sun is pretty Damn HOT!

2. Paul Rhoads, Iowa State vs. Iowa – In Paul Rhoads last 25 games at Iowa State his Cyclones have posted the downright startling and depressing win/loss record of…

5 – 20

….and rightly so Paul Rhoads’ ass is now hotter than that coffee that some Idiot spilled on himself and sued McDonald’s about years ago and won BIG which we seem to recall was Pretty, Pretty Hot Coffee which means a loss in this spot to the Iowa Hawkeyes and fellow Hot Seat coach Kirk Ferentz would be nothing short of a…

Complete Freaking Disaster!

3. Kirk Ferentz, Iowa vs. Iowa State – Consider this in the Total Disaster that Iowa Football has become in recent years under the $4 Million Dollar Per Year Man Kirk Ferentz:

In Iowa’s last 40 games the $4 Million Dollar Per Year Man Kirk Ferentz has posted a win/loss record of…

20 – 20!

That’s right the University of Iowa….or rather the fans of Iowa Football and in many ways collectively college football fans across America that watch all of these college football games on TV have collectively paid Kirk Ferentz over the past four football seasons something on the order of….

$15 Million Dollars

….for 20 Stinking Wins which works out to the amazing number…

$750,000 Per Freaking Win!

Seriously…you CANNOT make this kind of stuff up and thus why Kirk Ferentz and his Iowa Hawkeyes CANNOT lose to Iowa State on Saturday because if they do the above number goes up to….

$800,000 Per Freaking Win!

Hell, if Kirk Ferentz keeps up this Mediocre Football at Iowa by the end of the 2015 college football season he could be getting paid something on the order of…

$1,000,000 Per Freaking Win!

…and that’s good money IF you can find people STUPID enough to pay that kind of money for MEDIOCRITY which Kirk Ferentz has found in the state of Iowa IN SPADES!

4. Charlie Strong, Texas vs. Rice – Anyone that has read the Coaches Hot Seat Blog over the past EIGHT college football seasons knows that we have some good fishing and hunting buddies in the Austin, Texas area who are Texas grads and love showing us “City Boys” what life is like in the Republic of Texas while hunting and fishing and every so often we haul those “Texas Boys” up to Montana to show them what life is like when you really go into backcountry where the trout are large and the grizzly bears will eat your ass if you are not careful!

Getting back to the subject at hand which is….

The Rolling and Raging On Fire Wagon Train

…that is now Texas football we asked our Austin fishing and hunting buddies what the temperature was down in Texas relative to Charlie Strong and Texas football and their replay was…

“Let’s just say that if Texas loses to Rice on Saturday night Charlie Strong’s house could be on the market and sold before the Horns play Cal the next Saturday!”

Uhhhhh….we would call that the temperature of some wings we used to eat at a chicken wing place in Jacksonville Beach, Florida when a few of us were serving in the US Navy that were the Hottest Damn Wings we have ever put in our mouths and the very simple one word name for those wings was:

“Chernobyl”

This is very simple….Charlie Strong and Texas CANNOT lose to Rice on Saturday night…PERIOD.

5. Al Golden, Miami vs. FAU – If there is ONE coach in college football that knows he MUST produce in 2015 meaning win a Helluva lot of football games it is Miami’s head coach Al Golden and in Week 2 Golden and his Hurricanes play Florida Atlantic on Friday night and a loss in this spot with these SIX games up next…

Nebraska
At Cincinnati
At Florida State
Virginia Tech
At Clemson
At Duke

…would be nothing short of a Complete Freaking Disaster and send Al Golden’s ass onto the face of an O Class Star which in case you didn’t know…

Is One Helluva Hot Place for your ass to be sitting on!

6. Les Miles, LSU vs. Mississippi State – We don’t have any fishing and hunting buddies in the state of Louisiana but we have heard that if LSU loses to Mississippi State on Saturday night that Les Miles will not be traveling back to Baton Rouge with the LSU football team but will instead be taken immediately to Cape Kennedy in Florida where several influential LSU boosters have arranged to have Les Miles and his ass launched on a NASA rocket to…

Calvera the closest neutron star to Earth which is approximately 250 to 1000 light-years from Earth

….which it will take The Mad Hatter several million years to reach and we have also heard that in order to really stick-it-to Les Miles during the entire trip to Calvera those LSU boosters have arranged it so Les Miles will be forced watch a continuous loop replay of the January 2011 BCS Title Game loss to Alabama which most agree was the…

Boringest College Football Game of All Time!

Memo to Les Miles: Don’t Lose to Mississippi State!

7. David Shaw, Stanford vs. UCF – A few Coaches Hot Seat members were on a conference call this week with a “non-athletic related contact” of ours on the Stanford campus who keeps his ears to the ground for us on The Farm since we have to work for a living and cannot hang around the Stanford Athletic Complex and whip the football team into shape which this Stanford football team needs desperately and our “non-athletic related contact” at Stanford said something very Damn interesting on our weekly conference call:

“If Stanford loses to UCF on Saturday there is a very good chance that Stanford doesn’t win 6 games this season because of how fragile and weak this team is and how tough the remaining schedule is.”

Hmmmm….this Stanford football team is “fragile and weak?”

Yep…that was our opinion of the Stanford football team we saw in August on The Farm although our term of…

Balsa Wood Stanford Candy Asses

…for this the 2015 Stanford football team seems to be a little more on the nose to us!

Let’s look at Stanford’s remaining games in 2015

UCF
At USC
At Oregon State
Arizona
UCLA
Washington
At Washington State
At Colorado
Oregon
California
Notre Dame

Yep…if Stanford cannot beat UCF which just lost to FIU on their home field then…

There is NO WAY IN HELL that Stanford gets close to 6 wins this season which would further validate what we have seen happen in recent years that has turned the once Very Damn Tough Stanford Football Program into the…

Balsa Wood Stanford Candy Asses

…that will fold-up like a cheap tent bought from Wal-Mart if even the slightest gust of wind hits the campground on The Farm in this case!

YES….UCF is a CANNOT lose game for Stanford head coach David Shaw but then when the cake has already been mixed and baked there isn’t a Helluva lot that one can do to that cake once it is sitting on the counter of the kitchen!

8. Mike Leach, Washington State vs. Rutgers – With Washington State about to look down the pipe of NINE Pac-12 Conference Games that will ALL be very difficult wins for the Cougars if there is a game that Mike Leach and his WSU football team needs to win it is this Saturday’s game against Rutgers because a loss in this spot to fall to 0 – 2 on the season and it will next to impossible for Washington State to get to 6 wins in 2015 and that would make…

Three Out of Four Losing Seasons for Mike Leach at Washington State

YES…beating Rutgers is CRITICAL for Mike Leach and the Cougs!

9. Bob Stoops, Oklahoma vs. Tennessee – There is no doubt in our minds that Oklahoma head coach Bob Stoops would like to get the Sooners back into the running for a National Championship before he is politely told that his services are no longer needed in Norman since being just a little better than average is eventually not going to cut it at OU even for Bob Stoops, BUT when you talk to people around Norman and we mean folks that have some insight….not total insight but some insight….into what is going on the feeling that used to pervade Oklahoma football under Stoops….

That Dammit We ARE Going To Win Big 12 Championships and National Titles or Die Trying

….just NO LONGER EXISTS in Norman and there in a nutshell is what is wrong with OU football.

We are always coming up with new ways to rank college football head coaches here at Coaches Hot Seat and one way we came up with this past Summer was the “Hungry Meter” meaning on a 1 to 10 scale how “Hungry” is EVERY college football head coach to win Games, Championships and National Titles either at his current school or a bigger school if a great job opportunity presented itself. We have been tossing around the idea of publishing our opinion on the “Hungry Level” for each college football head coach BUT it is such a subjective opinion based on admitted less-than-perfect information we have held it back….so far.…BUT we will tell you of what “Hungry Level” we have OU head coach Bob Stoops at on a 1 to 10 scale to win Games, Championships and a National Title with the Sooners which is of course just our opinion:

Bob Stoops was a “10” on the “Hungry Meter” from 2001 to 2008

Bob Stoops was a “9” on the “Hungry Meter” from 2009 to 2011

Bob Stoops was an “8” on the “Hungry Meter” from 2012 to 2014

Bob Stoops current rating on the “Hungry Meter” = 7.8

In our opinion here at Coaches Hot Seat ANY college football head coach who has a rating of less than “9.5” on the Coaches Hot Seat “Hungry Meter” in today’s incredibly Damn competitive college football landscape has NO DAMN CHANCE to win a Conference Championships and National Titles.

Two Coaches Hot Seat members will be traveling up from Atlanta to Knoxville on Saturday for the Oklahoma – Tennessee game and they will report back on what they see from Bob Stoops and the Sooners….and our guess is….OU loses to Tennessee and ends up with 7 or 8 wins on the season and Bob Stoops is DONE at Oklahoma come December either in reality meaning no longer the head coach at OU or just a coach going through the motions hauling down millions of dollars a year for “X” number of years into the future.

Just our opinion.

10. Brian Kelly, Notre Dame vs. Virginia – Of course both Brian Kelly and Virginia head coach Mike London BADLY need a win in this spot BUT this is a game that Brian Kelly CANNOT lose after the Week 1 crushing of the Hapless Texas Longhorns that are still the Texas Longhorns even though they are now Hapless with a Capital “H” under Charlie Strong! With Georgia Tech coming to South Bend a week from Saturday a loss in this spot will not only dash the hopes of Irish faithful all over the country but would set-up the biggest game of Brian Kelly’s career at Notre Dame because a loss to Virginia followed by a loss to the Yellow Jackets at home would more than likely be a irreversible stake into Kelly’s future unless the Irish ran the table the rest of the way and there CANNOT be a Human Being alive on the Earth that believes the Irish could pull that off!

Our guess….Notre Dame whips Virginia just as UCLA did in Week 1….BUT if the Irish flop-around and lose this game to the Cavaliers Brian Kelly might as well travel on down to Cape Kennedy and get on that rocket with Les Miles that is headed to the closest neutron star because South Bend will be a terrible place to be next week even if Kelly will have to watch along with Miles a continuous loop of the 2011 BCS Title Game between LSU and Alabama which thankfully for ALL college football games was So Damn Boring it gave us the College Football Playoff!

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Al Golden, Brian Kelly, Candy Asses, Charlie Strong, Coaches Hot Seat, Coaches Hot Seat Rankings, Darrell Hazell, David Shaw, Kevin Wilson, Kirk Ferentz, Les Miles, LSU, Miami, Mike Leach, Mike London, Mike MacIntyre, Notre Dame, Paul Rhoads, Stanford, Texas, Virginia

Coaches Hot Seat Quotes of the Day – Friday, September 11, 2015 – Plato

Harry September 11, 2015 0 Comments

“A good decision is based on knowledge and not on numbers.”

And

“A hero is born among a hundred, a wise man is found among a thousand, but an accomplished one might not be found even among a hundred thousand men.”

And

“And what, Socrates, is the food of the soul? Surely, I said, knowledge is the food of the soul.”

And

“Courage is knowing what not to fear.”

And

“Every heart sings a song, incomplete, until another heart whispers back. Those who wish to sing always find a song. At the touch of a lover, everyone becomes a poet.”

And

“For a man to conquer himself is the first and noblest of all victories.”

And

“I exhort you also to take part in the great combat, which is the combat of life, and greater than every other earthly conflict.”

And

“Ignorance, the root and stem of all evil.”

And

“Life must be lived as play.”

And

“One of the penalties for refusing to participate in politics is that you end up being governed by your inferiors.”

And

“We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light.”

And

“Wise men speak because they have something to say; Fools because they have to say something.”

And

“If on the other hand I tell you that to let no day pass without discussing goodness and all the other subjects about which you hear me talking and examining both myself and others is really the very best thing that a man can do, and that life without this sort of examination is not worth living.”

And

“The beginning is the most important part of the work.”

And

“Musical training is a more potent instrument than any other, because rhythm and harmony find their way into the inward places of the soul.”

And

“Music gives a soul to the universe, wings to the mind, flight to the imagination and life to everything.”

And

“We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light.”

And

“Do not train a child to learn by force or harshness; but direct them to it by what amuses their minds, so that you may be better able to discover with accuracy the peculiar bent of the genius of each.”

And

“There is truth in wine and children”

And

“Ignorance, the root and stem of every evil.”

And

“Those who tell the stories rule society.”

And

“There are three classes of men; lovers of wisdom, lovers of honor, and lovers of gain.”

And

“The measure of a man is what he does with power.”

And

“Death is not the worst that can happen to men.”

And

“Character is simply habit long continued.”

Wikipedia: Plato

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Coaches Hot Seat, Coaches Hot Seat Rankings, Plato

Coaches Hot Seat Quotes of the Day – Thursday, September 10, 2015 – Norman Mailer

Harry September 10, 2015 0 Comments

“Every moment of one’s existence one is growing into more or retreating into less. One is always living a little more or dying a little bit.”

And

“Growth, in some curious way, I suspect, depends on being always in motion just a little bit, one way or another.”

And

“I don’t think life is absurd. I think we are all here for a huge purpose. I think we shrink from the immensity of the purpose we are here for.

And

“Masculinity is not something given to you, but something you gain. And you gain it by winning small battles with honor.”

And

“There was that law of life, so cruel and so just, that one must grow or else pay more for remaining the same.”

And

“Ultimately a hero is a man who would argue with the gods, and so awakens devils to contest his vision. The more a man can achieve, the more he may be certain that the devil will inhabit a part of his creation.”

And

“Somerset Maugham … wrote somewhere that “Nobody is any better than he ought to be.”… I carried it along with me as a working philosophy, but I suppose that finally I would have to take exception to the thought … or else the universe is just an elaborate clock.” The Deer Park, 1955

And

“The final purpose of art is to intensify, even, if necessary, to exacerbate, the moral consciousness of people.”

And

“Writing books is the closest men ever come to childbearing.”

And

“With the pride of an artist, you must blow against the walls of every power that exists, the small trumpet of your defiance.”

And

“His consolation in those hours when he was most uncharitable to himself is that taken at his very worst he was at least still worthy of being a character in a novel by Balzac, win one day, lose the next, and do it with boom! and baroque in the style.”

And

“There is no greater importance in all the world like knowing you are right and that the wave of the world is wrong, yet the wave crashes upon you

And

“New York is one of the capitals of the world and Los Angeles is a constellation of plastic, San Francisco is a lady, Boston has become Urban Renewal, Philadelphia and Baltimore and Washington blink like dull diamonds in the smog of Eastern Megalopolis, and New Orleans is unremarkable past the French Quarter. Detroit is a one-trade town, Pittsburgh has lost its golden triangle, St Louis has become the golden arch of the corporation, and nights in Kansas City close early. The oil depletion allowance makes Houston and Dallas naught but checkerboards for this sort of game. But Chicago is a great American city. Perhaps it is the last of the great American cities.”

And

“There are four stages to marriage. First there’s the affair, then there’s the marriage, then children, and finally the fourth stage, without which you cannot know a woman, the divorce.”

And

“We think of Marilyn who was every man’s love affair with America. Marilyn Monroe who was blonde and beautiful and had a sweet little rinky-dink of a voice and all the cleanliness of all the clean American backyards.”

And

“The highest prize in a world of men is the most beautiful woman available on your arm and living there in her heart loyal to you.”

And

“We sail across dominions barely seen, washed by the swells of time. We plow through fields of magnetism. Past and future come together on thunderheads and our dead hearts live with lightning in the wounds of the Gods.”

And

“I never saw love as luck, as that gift from the gods which put everything else in place, and allowed you to succeed. No, I saw love as reward. One could find it only after one’s virtue, or one’s courage, or self-sacrifice, or generosity, or loss, has succeeded in stirring the power of creation.”

And

“Obsession is the single most wasteful human activity, because with an obsession you keep coming back and back and back to the same question and never get an answer.”

And

“Booze, pot, too much sex, failure in one’s private life, too much attrition, too much recognition, too little recognition. Nearly everything in the scheme of things works to dull a first-rate talent. But the worst probably is cowardice.”

And

“There was that law of life so cruel and so just which demanded that one must grow or else pay more for remaining the same.”

And

“The sickness of our times for me has been just this damn thing that everything has been getting smaller and smaller and less and less important, that the romantic spirit has dried up, that there is no shame today…. We’re all getting so mean and small and petty and ridiculous, and we all live under the threat of extermination.”

And

“On a late-winter evening in 1983, while driving through fog along the Maine coast, recollections of old campfires began to drift into the March mist, and I thought of the Abnaki Indians of the Algonquin tribe who dwelt near Bangor a thousand years ago.”
Harry Hubbard, in Harlot’s Ghost : A Novel (1991)

And

“What if there are not only two nostrils, two eyes, two lobes, and so forth, but two psyches as well, and they are separately equipped? They go through life like Siamese twins inside one person…. They can be just a little different, like identical twins, or they can be vastly different, like good and evil.”
Kittredge Gardiner, in Harlot’s Ghost : A Novel (1991)

And

“There is one expanding horror in American life. It is that our long odyssey toward liberty, democracy and freedom-for-all may be achieved in such a way that utopia remains forever closed, and we live in freedom and hell, debased of style, not individual from one another, void of courage, our fear rationalized away.”

And

“We’ve got an agreeable, comfortable life here as Americans. But under it there’s a huge, free-floating anxiety. Our inner lives, our inner landscape is just like that sky out there — it’s full of smog. We really don’t know what we believe anymore, we’re nervous about everything.”

And

“Writing can wreck your body. You sit there on the chair hour after hour and sweat your guts out to get a few words.”

And

“Heaven and Hell make no sense if the majority of humans are a complex mixture of good and evil. There’s no reason to receive a reward if you’re 57/43—why sit around forever in an elevated version of Club Med? That’s almost impossible to contemplate.”

And

“If a person is not talented enough to be a novelist, not smart enough to be a lawyer, and his hands are too shaky to perform operations, he becomes a journalist.”

Wikipedia Page: Norman Mailer

(more…)

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Coaches Hot Seat, Coaches Hot Seat Rankings, Norman Mailer

Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 21 – 30 Hot Seat Coaches – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

Harry September 9, 2015 0 Comments

Give these Hot Seat Coaches Hell Mr. Cash!

Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

21. Frank Beamer, Virginia Tech – The Hokies played a decent game against Ohio State on Labor Day night but is “decent” what Virginia Tech football is all about now or are Va. Tech fans still serious about winning games and championships in Blacksburg?

Well, let’s go to Frank Beamer’s records over the past four seasons and see what just “decent” looks like at Virginia Tech:

2012 – 2015

Overall: 22 – 18

ACC: 12 – 12

Yep….that is BARELY just “decent” for Virginia Tech football especially when the records that Frank Beamer was putting-up while coaching the Hokies between 2004 and 2011 which makes us naturally wonder…

Just what in the Hell has gone wrong in Blacksburg because these records…

Overall: 22 – 18

ACC: 12 – 12

…just flat-out SUCK!

With the 0 – 1 start let’s go to what remains on Virginia Tech’s schedule to see if this indeed may be Frank Beamer’s last season in Blacksburg because just “decent” cannot continue in Hokieland….right?

Furman
At Purdue
At East Carolina
Pitt
NC State
At Miami
Duke
At Boston College
At Georgia Tech
North Carolina
Virginia

Geez…that’s a pretty tough schedule and there is a very REAL chance that Virginia Tech doesn’t win SIX games in 2015 and we cannot imagine that Frank Beamer will be coaching the Hokies in 2016 if they post a losing record this season unless of course Coach Beamer is not willing to go out with a losing record in his slamdunk College Football Hall of Fame coaching career and demands at least one more season.

We shall see….BUT if Virginia Tech loses at Purdue and/or at East Carolina in the coming weeks the 2015 season for the Hokies could get very Damn ugly in a hurry!

22. Bob Stoops, Oklahoma – We had heard that Bob Stoops got a little testy after a lot of questions at his press conference this week about the potential of the large and very loud crowd at Tennessee’s Neyland Stadium having an adverse impact on the Sooners this coming Saturday so we had our former US Navy Intelligence Officer and now Coaches Hot Seat member look at a tape of Stoops’ Monday press conference to get his take on Bob’s level of concern about Neyland Stadium and here is what he came away with:

Video

“Very simply Bob Stoops is worried about the crowd at Neyland Stadium especially how the noise level of the crowd could get Oklahoma off their game early on and lead to mistakes that could lead to Tennessee getting a lead that might be too much for the Sooners to overcome to win the game. Just a guess, but I think Bob Stoops and the OU coaching staff are just hoping to weather the storm in the first quarter and not fall more than 2 scores behind at the most.”

So Bob Stoops is worried about the potential of the Tennessee crowd at Neyland Stadium having an adverse impact upon the Sooners especially early-on in the game against the Vols BUT then what is really at stake in this Oklahoma – Tennessee game for the Sooners?

Since it seems Oklahoma is no longer in the…

Winning A National Championship Business

..under Bob Stoops and things in Norman seem to be about trying to get to 10 wins so a decent bowl game can be delivered to the Sooner faithful so a loss in this spot to Tennessee really is…

No Big Whoop!

….because OU can find 9 more wins on their regular season schedule after the Vols….right?

Tulsa
West Virginia
Texas – Dallas
At Kansas State
Texas Tech
At Kansas
Iowa State
At Baylor
TCU
At Oklahoma State

Maybe…Maybe Not…but Hell Bob Stoops can keep coaching Oklahoma for as long as he wants winning 8 games a year so would it matter if the Sooners won 8 games again in 2015 and then got their asses whipped in a bowl game?

Not Really and thus why Tennessee should beat Oklahoma on Saturday because the TRUTH is…

This game means a Helluva lot more to Butch Jones and the Volunteers than Bob Stoops and the Sooners

….in our humble opinion of course.

As we write the above a few Coaches Hot Seat members remember back to another time when losing a football game was a…

Complete Freaking Disaster

….to Bob Stoops and the Sooners and one game in particular stands out in our minds and that was the Oklahoma at Oregon game at Autzen Stadium in Eugene, Oregon on September 16, 2006 which those Coaches Hot Seat members watched from the Oklahoma sideline.

Oh, that was a great football game between the Sooners and Ducks with Oklahoma being royally ripped-off by some Pac-12 refs at the end on a BOGUS call on an onside kick! Enjoy and go to the 2:45 mark in the below video to see the Bullshit against the Sooners begin!

23. Willie Taggart, South Florida – Willie Taggart and his South Florida Bulls got a win over Cupcake Florida A&M in Week 1 BUT now Willie…the REAL work begins! Check-out South Florida’s next four games!

At Florida State
At Maryland
Memphis
Syracuse

Geez…if USF is 2 – 3 after their fifth game they will be lucky and thus that is your charge Willie Taggart….

Be 2 – 3 at least when you take USF to UConn on October 17!

Can South Florida win at least 5 more games in 2015 with the below remaining games still to be played?

At Florida State
At Maryland
Memphis
Syracuse
At UConn
SMU
At Navy
At East Carolina
Temple
Cincinnati
At UCF

We don’t see why in the Hell not?

Coach up those Bulls Willie!

24. Dana Holgorsen, West Virginia – Dana Holgorsen and West Virginia got an impressive win in Week 1 over what should be a pretty good Georgia Southern team by a score of…

44 – 0

…and Liberty is up next so that means the 2015 college football season doesn’t really begin for Holgorsen until WVU plays Maryland on September 26 in Morgantown.

Until then Dana Holgorsen will be cooling his heels on the Hot Seat!

One interesting side-note we ran across the below interesting article in Morgantown Magazine about Dana Holgorsen’s house in Morgantown:

Tall Timber: The home of WVU’s Dana Holgorsen is the first luxury residence in the U.S. to be built completely of cross-laminated timber, Laura Wilcox Rote, Morgantown Magazine

Oh, one particular comment at the bottom of the article on Dana Holgorsen’s house in Morgantown by Sara Perfin caught our attention here at Coaches Hot Seat!

25. Ron Caragher, San Jose State – Ron Caragher and San Jose State got their Cupcake win in Week 1 over New Hampshire but check-out what the Spartans have coming up next!

At Air Force
At Oregon State
Fresno State
At Auburn

WOW!

Got 1 – 4 to start the 2015 season Ron Caragher?

You are about to Ron so you better Damn make hay in 2015 in Mountain West Conference play!

26. Mike Riley, Nebraska – Although we wish Mike Riley nothing but the best at Nebraska we have a sneaking suspicion that Riley’s tenure in Lincoln is going to be….

A Gosh Darn Complete Freaking Disaster

….and we don’t know if Nebraska could have found a worse way to open Mike Riley’s tenure than to lose a game that would have been a win if ONLY…

ONE Nebraska player would have made a Freaking Play on that Hail Brigham Young Pass!

OK….0 – 1 is not too bad and South Alabama is up next which Nebraska SHOULD win easily and then it’s a trip to Miami to play the Hurricanes in a Hot Seat vs. Hot Seat Coaching Match-Up that will send one coach….

Soaring Off the Hot Seat

AND another coach

Soaring Up the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings!

Until Saturday September 19 and that Nebraska – Miami game in Miami we will leave Mike Riley alone BUT for Dang sure Mike….

Don’t Lose to South Alabama for the Pillsbury Dough Boy’s Sake!

27. Brian Kelly, Notre Dame – Notre Dame whipped Texas in Week 1 by a score of 38 – 3 but then whipping Texas these days is like a fat man saying he just destroyed a chocolate cake which means that…

Any Damn Decent Football Team in America Could Whip Texas!

AND

Any Random Fat Man in America Could Destroy A Chocolate Cake!

Now at 1 – 0 Notre Dame travels to play Virginia in Charlottesville and although this looks like a BIG mismatch this is the EXACT kind of game that Brian Kelly has lost in his tenure with the Irish…

Games that Brian Kelly SHOULD win…he often loses….in spectacular fashion!

Come on now…Notre Dame is not going to lose to a Virginia team that under Mike London has put up FOUR losing seasons in the last FIVE years….right?

Well…if Notre Dame did lose to Virginia on Saturday Brian Kelly would wake-up next Monday morning with…

His Ass on the No. 1 Hot Seat in America!

28. Paul Haynes, Kent State – Paul Haynes is in his third season now as the head coach at Kent State and has put up records of….

2013: 4 – 8
2014: 2 – 9
2015: 0 – 1

Overall: 6 – 18

MAC: 4 – 11

YES…the above kind of records will land your ass on the Hot Seat and after an opening season loss to Illinois Paul Haynes and his Golden Flashes play Delaware State on Saturday in a MUST WIN game before having to travel to play the future 2015 Big Ten West Division Champion in our opinion……Minnesota.

Now that Paul Haynes is on the Hot Seat for the first time we would like to welcome Paul Hayes to the Hot Seat and here’s to getting your ass off the Hot Seat soon Paul!

29. Norm Chow, Hawaii – How about the Hawaii Warriors opening up the 2015 college football season with a win over Pac-12 member….

Colorado Buffaloes

…..to which we can only say..

Congrats Norm Chow!

Oh….Hawaii plays….

At Ohio State!

…in Week 2!

Damn!

Here’s the good news….after Ohio State the Hawaii Warriors play…

UC Davis!

….and then….

At Wisconsin
At Boise State!

Damn Norm Chow! Who is making these schedules for you there in The Islands?

Attila the Hun?

Good Luck against Ohio State Norm Chow!

30. George O’Leary, UCF – When we saw the below story about George O’Leary wanting to step-down as the head football coach at UCF and become the AD at the school at the end of the season…

George O’Leary wants to stay on as athletic director at Central Florida, Dan Wolken, USA Today

…some Bastard here at Coaches Hot Seat said to no one in particular:

“Hell, if George O’Leary wants to be the UCF athletic director he needs to step-down right now because if he is thinking about such a move no doubt he is not putting everything into coaching his football team in 2015.”

And then this….

FIU – 15
UCF – 14

Evidently that Bastard Coaches Hot Seat member was right because George O’Leary’s UCF football team just got beat by a team in FIU that very simply…

Had No Damn Business Beating UCF

….which brings us back to this point:

If George O’Leary wants to be the AD at UCF then he should quit coaching the Knights football team right now

…because things don’t get any easier in Week 2…

Hold it a second…UCF plays the Balsa Wood Stanford Candy Asses next on The Farm and Hell if you just show up and pop the Balsa Wood Stanford Candy Asses in the mouth they will go home crying to their Momma so maybe George O’Leary can get things back-on-track for UCF in Week 2 with a win over the…

Balsa Wood Stanford Candy Asses

….and get his ass of the Hot Seat in the process!

This should be great fun on The Farm this Saturday with…

The Balsa Wood Stanford Candy Asses playing their first home game on The Farm in 2015 after embarrassing Stanford University and themselves at Northwestern in Week 1

AND

George O’Leary making calls from the sideline during the game to someone…who the Hell knows who….to see if he has been named the AD at UCF yet!

What happens exactly when….

Balsa Wood Stanford Candy Asses meets an opposing team that has a head coach that is working on his next job which in this case is the athletic director position at UCF?

We don’t have a Freaking Clue but we are all about to find out and Hell when you combine Balsa Wood with a head coach looking for another job it promise to be…

A Great and Fun Day on The Farm!

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Balsa Wood Boys, Bob Stoops, Brian Kelly, Candy Asses, Dana Holgorsen, Frank Beamer, George O'Leary, Hawaii, Kent State, Mike Riley, Nebraska, Norm Chow, Notre Dame, Oklahoma, Paul Haynes, Ron Caragher, San Jose State, South Florida, Stanford, UCF, Virginia Tech, West Virginia, Willie Taggart

Coaches Hot Seat Quotes of the Day – Wednesday, September 9, 2015 – Joseph Campbell

Harry September 9, 2015 0 Comments

“A hero is someone who has given his or her life to something bigger than oneself.”

And

“Find a place inside where there’s joy, and the joy will burn out the pain.”

And

“Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors where there were only walls.”

And

“I don’t believe people are looking for the meaning of life as much as they are looking for the experience of being alive.”

And

“Is the system going to flatten you out and deny you your humanity, or are you going to be able to make use of the system to the attainment of human purposes?”

And

“It is by going down into the abyss that we recover the treasures of life. Where you stumble, there lies your treasure.”

And

“Life is without meaning. You bring the meaning to it. The meaning of life is whatever you ascribe it to be. Being alive is the meaning.”

And

“Opportunities to find deeper powers within ourselves come when life seems most challenging.”

And

“The big question is whether you are going to be able to say a hearty yes to your adventure.”

And

“The goal of life is to make your heartbeat match the beat of the universe, to match your nature with Nature.”

And

“The privilege of a lifetime is being who you are.”

And

“We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.”

And

“When we quit thinking primarily about ourselves and our own self-preservation, we undergo a truly heroic transformation of consciousness.”

And

“When you make the sacrifice in marriage, you’re sacrificing not to each other but to unity in a relationship.”

And

“Your life is the fruit of your own doing. You have no one to blame but yourself.”

And

“Your sacred space is where you can find yourself again and again.”

And

“It’s only when a man tames his own demons that he becomes the king of himself if not of the world.”

And

“The achievement of the hero is one that he is ready for and it’s really a manifestation of his character.”

And

“People say that what we’re all seeking is a meaning for life. I don’t think that’s what we’re really seeking. I think what we’re seeking is an experience of being alive, so that our life experiences on the purely physical plane will have resonance within our own innermost being and reality, so that we actually feel the rapture of being alive. That’s what it’s all finally about.”

And

“One thing that comes out in myths is that at the bottom of the abyss comes the voice of salvation. The black moment is the moment when the real message of transformation is going to come. At the darkest moment comes the light.”

And

“The way to find out about your happiness is to keep your mind on those moments when you feel most happy, when you really are happy-not excited, not just thrilled, but deeply happy. This requires a little bit of self analysis. What is it that makes you happy? Stay with it, no matter what people tell you. This is what I call “following your bliss.”

And

“The happy ending of the fairy tale, the myth, and the divine comedy of the soul, is to be read, not as a contradiction, but as a transcendence of the universal tragedy of man. …Tragedy is the shattering of the forms and of our attachment to the forms… the two are the terms of a single mythological theme… the down-going and the up-coming (kathados and anodos), which together constitute the totality of the revelation that is life, and which the individual must know and love if he is to be purged (katharsis=purgatorio) of the contagion of sin (disobedience to the divine will) and death (identification with the mortal form). “All things are changing; nothing dies…”

And

“Eternity isn’t some later time. Eternity isn’t a long time. Eternity has nothing to do with time. Eternity is that dimension of here and now which thinking and time cuts out. This is it. And if you don’t get it here, you won’t get it anywhere. And the experience of eternity right here and now is the function of life. There’s a wonderful formula that the Buddhists have for the Bodhisattva, the one whose being (sattva) is illumination (bodhi), who realizes his identity with eternity and at the same time his participation in time. And the attitude is not to withdraw from the world when you realize how horrible it is, but to realize that this horror is simply the foreground of a wonder and to come back and participate in it. “All life is sorrowful” is the first Buddhist saying, and it is. It wouldn’t be life if there were not temporality involved which is sorrow. Loss, loss, loss.”

And

“Follow your bliss.”

And

“Bill Moyers: Unlike heroes such as Prometheus or Jesus, we’re not going on our journey to save the world but to save ourselves.
Joseph Campbell: But in doing that you save the world. The influence of a vital person vitalizes, there’s no doubt about it. The world without spirit is a wasteland. People have the notion of saving the world by shifting things around, changing the rules, and who’s on top, and so forth. No, no! Any world is a valid world if it’s alive. The thing to do is to bring life to it, and the only way to do that is to find in your own case where the life is and become alive yourself.”

And

“Marx teaches us to blame society for our frailties, Freud teaches us to blame our parents, and astrology teaches us to blame the universe. The only place to look for blame is within: you didn’t have the guts to bring up your full moon and live the life that was your potential.”

Wikipedia: Joseph Campbell

(more…)

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Coaches Hot Seat, Coaches Hot Seat Rankings, Joseph Campbell

Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 11 – 20 Hot Seat Coaches – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

Harry September 8, 2015 0 Comments

Give these Hot Seat Coaches Hell Mr. Cash!

Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

11. Paul Petrino, Idaho – Now in his third season at Idaho head coach Paul Petrino has posted a record of…

2 – 22

…which includes an opening 2015 season loss to Ohio by a score of 45 – 28.

YES…2 – 22 will land your ass on the Hot Seat and that is exactly where Paul Petrino is at and has been for years now!

12. Ron Turner, Florida International – We are not quite sure how FIU beat UCF in Orlando on Thursday…more on George O’Leary who is now on the Hot Seat due to the loss to FIU in a bit…but a win is a win and a win over UCF moves Ron Turner down the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings BUT if Turner is going to get off the Hot Seat for good he will need more than 4 wins in 2015 and HELL if you can beat UCF in Orlando you can beat a pitiful Indiana team in Bloomington this coming Saturday….right?

RIGHT!

13. David Shaw, Stanford – Dozens of Coaches Hot Seat members were in the San Francisco Bay area and around Stanford University for work and various professional educational things in August so many of us were able to take-in and size-up the Stanford football August preseason camp and by the third week of August a consensus had been reached that we came very close to publishing in the Coaches Hot Seat Blog that we held back on because….WELL….maybe we were wrong and why send out alarms to Stanford’s first opponent Northwestern about potential problems with Stanford football so we kept our mouths shut.

After seeing in person and watching on TV the Stanford – Northwestern game this past Saturday we can now say….

WE WERE NOT WRONG!

….about the Complete Freaking Disaster that we were watching unfold in August on The Farm which has led to the…

Complete Freaking Disaster that is Stanford Football right now!

Let’s quickly summarize what several Coaches Hot Seat members saw in August with Stanford football by quoting a CHS Member on what he thought of the Cardinal’s August camp practices:

“If you held all of Stanford’s August football practices in a balsa wood house not only would the balsa wood house still be standing there would not be one dent in any of the balsa wood!”

What the Hell does the above mean exactly?

Stanford Football NO LONGER PLAYS FOOTBALL under head coach David Shaw but rather Shaw just holds pillow fights among the players so the…

Candy Ass Coaches and Candy Ass Players can act like they are football players when in FACT

….any random sorority football team from any university in the country could whip the Hell out of the….

Candy Ass Coaches and Candy Ass Players that call themselves Stanford Football!

On top of Stanford Football players being Candy Asses that are coached by Candy Asses did anyone else catch the Stanford offense against Northwestern?

Got there are Thousands of Pee Wee football teams across America that not only hit harder but are better coached and more sophisticated than the Stanford offense right now?

What a Complete Freaking Joke Stanford Football is right now and in our opinion the current state of Stanford Football goes straight to the head coach David Shaw who also in our opinion…

Wouldn’t know an honest day’s work if it hit him in the ass!

No David Shaw…sitting in your office listening to jazz music is NOT working IF you are the head coach of the Stanford football team which by the way you have turned into the…

Biggest Group of Candy Asses in the American Republic today!

Congratulations David Shaw you should be Mighty Damn Proud of Yourself because you are going to do the Next Too Damn Impossible….

Be handed a championship football program from Jim Harbaugh and less than three years later be now sitting on a record over your last 15 games of…

8 – 7

….and headed towards getting your precious jazz listening ass run right off The Farm!

Up next for the Candy Asses in Cardinal:

UCF this coming Saturday on The Farm which just lost to FIU at home!

Here’s a thought:

The Stanford football coaches and players should all get in their best Sunday dresses out and find some nice pillows from the nearby Macy’s at the Stanford Shopping Center for the UCF game and do what they best and love so very much in style…

Have a Pillow Fight!

Fear the Tree? No…not any longer on The Farm!

Fear the Pillows being swung by the Candy Ass Coaches and Players on the Stanford NOT A Football Team anymore!

14. Les Miles, LSU – Let’s give the award…

Thank God Almighty that those Idiots weren’t around during World War II

…to the LSU athletic department that could not find a way to move a game one day forward to Sunday after the McNeese State – LSU game was cancelled on Saturday which lots of…

Flunky Paper Pushers in the LSU Athletic Department

….couldn’t somehow do who no doubt would be selling apples on the local street corner if they weren’t working in athletics where morons can hang around forever whether they are actually good at their jobs or not who and couldn’t just say this simple Damn thing:

“Sorry Folks….the McNeese State – LSU game is cancelled…see everyone back here at Tiger Stadium tomorrow for a 5PM for kick-off.”

Would the above had meant that the McNeese State football team would have driven the 130 miles back to their campus in Lake Charles to spend the night and driven back to Baton Rouge on Sunday for the game?

YES….Big Freaking Deal!

Would the above have meant that LSU Athletics would have spent a few extra hundred thousand dollars in overtime for people working in and around Tiger Stadium?

YES…Big Freaking Deal!

Would the above have meant that LSU athletic administrators otherwise known as Precious Candy Ass Paper Pushers would have had to do some extra work over the weekend?

YES…Big Freaking Deal!

Bottom-Line: LSU Athletics is run by Complete Freaking Morons that cannot move a football game…..A Freaking Football Game…one day forward!

YES…it is true…there are Complete Freaking Morons in position of authority all over America right now and LSU Athletics is a prime example of that FACT!

Getting back to Les Miles the LSU Tigers now open the season at Mississippi State and if Les Miles’ football team loses that game…

Expect your ass to be the temperature in the Bayou on a HOT August Day Les Miles!

15. Kliff Kingsbury, Texas Tech – PBK’s….Pretty Boy Kingsbury…football team at Texas Tech got a 59 – 45 win over FCS team Sam Houston in Week 1 which means about as much as a grain of sand being washed into the ocean and in Week 2 the Red Raiders play UTEP at home in a game that very simply…

PBK…Pretty Boy Kingsbury….CANNOT LOSE

….with Arkansas in Week 3.

Oh…Arkansas beat UTEP in Week 1 by the score of 48 – 13 so everyone here at Coaches Hot Seat will be watching this UTEP – Texas Tech game and score very closely!

Good Luck to you PBK!

16. Steve Sarkisian, USC – USC whipped an overmatched Arkansas State team in Week 1 and the Trojans play a very weak Idaho team in Week 2 and then USC gets…

The Balsa Wood Candy Ass Pillow Fight Boys of Stanford in Week 3

….so USC should EASILY be 3 – 0 when they head to play Arizona State in Tempe on September 26.

As for Steve Sarkisian and his recent “troubles” we can only say to Steve….

Focus on Family and Football Steve and keep the Focus there….PERIOD.

17. Larry Fedora, North Carolina – North Carolina looked better…especially the UNC defense under Gene Chizik…than the Tar Heels looked in 2014 BUT the OLD Ball Coach’s South Carolina team looked AVERAGE at best so was UNC’s performance against the Gamecocks something to be impressed with or just….whatever?

In our opinion….WHATEVER….because there are probably some high schools team in the South that could whip the South Carolina team that the OLD Ball Coach ran out onto the field in Charlotte!

Coming up for Larry Fedora and North Carolina:

NC A&T
Illinois
Delaware

Hell…North Carolina SHOULD be…

3 – 1

…when go to Atlanta to play Georgia Tech on October 3!

If not…Larry Fedora knows where he will be….no NOT on the beach with is shirt off wowing the ladies and looking for someone that will take a picture of him but rather….

On the FREAKING HOT SEAT!

18. Kirk Ferentz, Iowa – It’s not just the Iowa football team that is a Complete Freaking Disaster at the University of Iowa after reading about who Iowa just hired as the new president of the school….

Rocky Start for University of Iowa President, Rekha Basu, Des Moines Register

“Less than 2 percent of the faculty thinks J. Bruce Harreld is qualified to be the University of Iowa’s next president; among the college community at large, it’s 2.6 percent. By contrast, more than 90 percent of respondents to a campus survey gave high ratings to the other three finalists.

Nonetheless, Harreld was named UI’s 21st president Thursday in a unanimous vote from the Iowa Board of Regents. In so doing, they chose a former business executive with no experience in university administration, whose resume lists as his present employer a company he has since acknowledged no longer exists.

Harreld has also admitted he’ll have a steep learning curve for the job, and that his “unusual background” will mean he’ll need a lot of teaching, coaching and mentoring from those who criticized him. It’s good he acknowledged that, and gracious to extend the olive branch. But considering he’ll earn $590,000, plus $200,000 annually in deferred compensation, on-the-job training shouldn’t be necessary.”

What in the Freaking Hell?

Of course, the Iowa regents hiring this Buffoon as the new University of Iowa president makes the school paying football coach Kirk Ferentz $4 Million Dollars a year make sense….well…NOTHING can make paying Kirk Ferentz all that money for mediocrity make sense which brings us to the…

$4 Million Dollar Man Kirk Ferentz

…who over the last five seasons while earning around $20 Million Dollars has posted records of…

Overall: 34 – 30

Big Ten: 19 – 21

…which is a good gig if you can’t be the president of the University of Iowa who it seems is NOT qualified for the job while hauling down almost $800K a year!

Anyone else starting to notice a pattern here at the University of Iowa and if so what does that pattern mean?

We don’t know the exact answer to that question but there are plenty of people here at Coaches Hot Seat that are NOT qualified for lots of jobs at the University of Iowa that make six-figures a year and if we can just get to the right person in Iowa no doubt we will be hired in a Helluva hurry…and kept around whether we FAIL at our jobs or not!

Who is dumber….the folks at LSU that can’t move a football game one day forward or the folks at Iowa that pay a football coach millions of dollars for mediocrity and just hired a president that in our opinion that doesn’t know his ass from the side of a barn when it comes to run a major state university?

It’s Iowa by an eyelash!

The N-O Man: The University of Iowa’s new president has no experience, no ideas, and flubbed his own resume, Kembrew McLeod, Slate.com

Oh, these are just Complete Freaking Idiots at the University of Iowa!

19. Mike MacIntyre, Colorado – As we said last week in the Preseason Coaches Hot Seat Ranking Analysis we were hoping for a…

Herculean Effort

…by Mike MacIntyre and the Colorado Buffs in 2015 and what in the Hell did the CU Buffs do in the first game against Hawaii?

The CU Buffs looked like Complete Freaking Buffoons at the opening of the game against the Warriors and it really looked like the head coach and coaching staff showed up at the first game on the sideline without coaching during August camp at all!

Geez….Mike MacIntyre…what in the Hell is going on in Boulder son?

Our recommendation for Colorado head coach Mike MacIntyre: Get things fixed with your football team this week against UMass because if you lose that Week 3 game to Colorado State which has a first-year head coach in Mike Bobo the rest of the 2015 football season could turn into a Complete Freaking Disaster especially with the Oregon Ducks coming to town on October 3.

If Colorado somehow lost to UMass this Saturday in Boulder Mike MacIntyre and the entire CU coaching staff should be fired before they leave the field and a local high school staff should be hired to coach the rest of the season!

Memo to Mike MacIntyre: Get Off Your Ass Son!

20. Mike Leach, Washington State – Really Mike Leach?

Lose to Portland State in the home opening game in Pullman?

Really Mike Leach?

Your Football Team looked like SHIT on Saturday Mike Leach and since we know you can coach we can only draw ONE conclusion after that pitiful loss to Portland State:

Mike Leach just no longer gives a SHIT because his Washington State football team now plays like SHIT!

In Mike Leach’s last 15 football games at Washington State the Cougars are…

3 – 12

…and those 3 wins last season were over….

Portland State
Utah
Oregon State

Oh…Portland State and Oregon State had losing records last year so in the last 15 games Mike Leach has beaten…

1 Team with a winning record

…and anyone that recalls the Washington State – Utah game from last season knows it took a miracle for the Cougars to win that game!

What is going on at Washington State exactly with Mike Leach?

Well…it’s just our opinion…but Mike Leach was always a terrible fit for Pullman, Washington because look at where Mike Leach was living when he could live anywhere he wanted to live…

Key West, Florida

Still…Mike Leach won a lot of football games at Texas Tech in Lubbock, Texas which isn’t Key West, Florida either so there really is no excuse for Mike Leach to be losing to Portland State in the first game of this third season at Washington State so then just what in the Hell is going on in Pullman?

We think we know BUT we are going to hold our tongue and watch and see IF…

Mike Leach and Washington State just flat out QUIT in 2015 after the opening season loss OR if they come back strong this week in a very tough game at Rutgers.

Your choice Mike Leach and Washington State BUT if Mike Leach does fail at Washington State he will be remembered as…

The Football Coach that got run out of Lubbock

AND

The Football Coach that QUIT in Pullman

Great thing is Mike Leach will be able to determine how this story ends and if it ends badly whether we like Mike Leach or not if the current trend continues in Pullman we will light Mike Leach’s ass up!

Is everyone reading the Coaches Hot Seat Blog starting to understand that we are TOUGHEST on the people we expect the most from?

That’s way ALL alumni and fans should be….don’t accept anything less than…

EXCELLENCE

…and you have a Helluva lot better chance of actually getting…

EXCELLENCE!

21 – 30 Post Week Hot Seat Coaches Analysis Coming Soon!

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Candy Asses, Coaches Hot Seat, Coaches Hot Seat Rankings, Colorado, David Shaw, Florida International, Idaho, Iowa, Kirk Ferentz, Kliff Kingsbury, Les Miles, LSU, Mike Leach, Mike MacIntyre, Paul Petrino, Pillow Fight, Ron Turner, Stanford, Steve Sarkisian, Texas Tech, USC, Washington State

Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 1 – 10 Hot Seat Coaches – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

Harry September 8, 2015 0 Comments

If you don’t think time flies this is the NINTH college football season that Coaches Hot Seat will be…what exactly?

Throwing out our opinions from the peanut gallery on the job status of college and now NFL head coaches and generally being the all-around “Shit-Disturbers” that our wives love so much?

Yep…that’s about it and to think this entire Coaches Hot Seat “thing” started with seven guys sitting around a table in the bar the Balboa Café in the Marina section of San Francisco in the Fall of 2006 talking about how in the Hell they were going to get Walt Harris’ sorry ass fired as the head coach of the Stanford football team!

Hell, let’s end this trip down memory lane and get to the subject at hand which is what College Football Head Coaches are on the Hot Seat at the end of Week 1 of the 2015 College Football season! Geez…that felt very Damn good to type that out and with the memories of Week 1 dancing in the heads of Coaches Hot Seat members and college football fans everywhere let’s bring the Late Great Johnny Cash to get things rolling!

Give these Hot Seat Coaches Hell Mr. Cash!

Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Ranking

1. Darrell Hazell, Purdue – No doubt…Purdue played very hard against a very good Marshall team on Sunday…BUT…is anyone going to argue that a coach in his third season coaching a Big Ten Conference football team…

Darrell Hazell – Purdue

…should lose to a Conference USA team even if that CUSA team is very well coached and a Top 50 team in the country?

NO….no one should argue that it was OK that Purdue lost to Marshall on Sunday with a head coach in his third year on the job and thus that is why Darrell Hazell now sits on the…

No. 1 Hot Seat!

Up next for Hazell and Purdue…

Indiana State

…and then Virginia Tech at home which is a game that in our opinion Purdue can and should win and in a few weeks and thus the Purdue Boilermakers should be….

2 – 1

….when they host Bowling Green on September 26.

Keep coaching these kids up Darrell!

2. Kevin Wilson, Indiana – Really Kevin Wilson? Really?

In Kevin Wilson’s FIFTH season as the head coach of the Indiana Hoosiers football team IU was only able to beat FCB Southern Illinois at home by a score of…

48 – 47

….and that is a Southern Illinois team that put up a record of…

6 – 6

…in 2014!

Really Kevin Wilson?

Here’s the bad news for Kevin Wilson and Indiana…the rest of the Hoosiers non-conference slate after the close win over the Salukis:

FIU – Which just beat UCF

Western Kentucky – Which just beat Vanderbilt

At Wake Forest – Which isn’t that good BUT is sure the Hell better than Southern Illinois!

YES…Kevin Wilson’s head coaching career should be flashing before his eyes right now because it’s on the verge of extinction if the past continues into the future in Bloomington!

YES….we would heartedly recommend your Indiana team beat FIU on Saturday Kevin Wilson!

3. Paul Rhoads, Iowa State – The good news is that Iowa State beat Northern Iowa by a score of 38 – 7 on Saturday and the bad news is that means about as much as…

A Pinto Bean rolling across the heartland of America right now!

…which means the 2015 college football season actually begins for Paul Rhoads and Iowa State this coming Saturday in their home game against the Iowa Hawkeyes!

With both head coaches in Paul Rhoads and Kirk Ferentz coming into this game on the Hot Seat the Winning Coach will…

Have the HEAT turned down a bit

..and the Losing Coach can be assured…

His ass will be lit-up like prairie of corn on fire in the Iowa heartland!

Anyone else ever seen a prairie of corn on fire in the Iowa heartland?

It isn’t a pretty sight at all and thus why we recommend to BOTH Paul Rhoads and Kirk Ferentz they BOTH win this game which when one thinks about it pretty much assures that either Rhoads or Ferentz’s…

Ass will be lit-up like prairie of corn on fire in the Iowa heartland!

….come next Monday morning!

Oh…Paul Rhoads record against Iowa in six seasons at Iowa State is…

2 – 4

…which is a winning percentage of .333% which is not all that different than Rhoads overall winning percentage coaching the Cyclones which now sit at .395%!

4. Doug Martin, New Mexico State – Score from Saturday’s game:

Florida – 61
NMSU – 13

Doug Martin’s record at New Mexico State:

4 – 21

Uhhhhh…that equals Hot Seat!

Enough said on New Mexico State!

5. Mike London, Virginia – In the South when Southerners are really feeling sorry for your ass but in reality they really don’t give a Damn about your predicament they will say something like….

“Well, just bless your heart.”

We are not going to say…

“Well, just bless your heart.”

…to Virginia head coach Mike London after his Cavaliers got blasted 34 – 16 by UCLA on Saturday because we truly would like to see Mike London succeed at UVA but then how can anyone look at the following records for Mike and not put London’s ass on the Hot Seat?

Overall: 23 – 29
ACC: 11 – 29

If the above continues in 2015 and thus can keep someone employed at the University of Virginia we will be applying to UVA soon for a job because you evidently can fail like a Sorry Son of a Bitch and make Millions of Dollars a year at the school that Thomas Jefferson founded!

Oh..up next for Virginia….

Notre Dame at home!

“Well, just bless Mike London’s heart,” Notre Dame fans around America are now saying in unison!

6. Trent Miles, Georgia State – Score from Saturday’s game:

Charlotte – 23
Georgia State – 20

Trent Miles record at Georgia State:

1 – 24

Uhhhhh…that equals Hot Seat!

Enough said on Georgia State!

7. Todd Monken, Southern Miss – Southern Miss played a decent game against Mississippi State for about a half BUT we nor anyone else with a working brain gave Todd Monken and his Golden Eagles much of a chance to beat the Bulldogs which means there is yet another loss on the board and that leave Monken’s records in his third season on the job in Hattiesburg at…

Overall: 4 – 21

Conference: 2 – 14

YES…Larry Fedora did win 12 games in the 2011 season at Southern Miss and now over the last three seasons plus Southern Miss has won….

4 Football Games!

Shocking…just Damn Shocking!

8. Charlie Strong, Texas – It’s one thing in your second year on the job at Texas to take your football team to South Bend, Indiana and lose to Notre Dame.

There is no shame in losing to Notre Dame after all BUT in Charlie Strong’s second year on the job at Texas Strong took his Longhorns to South Bend and lost…

38 – 3

….in a performance where…

The Texas Offense did not exist

The Texas Defense did not exist

The Texas Special Teams barely existed

…which makes us wonder here at Coaches Hot Seat:

Just what in the Hell has Charlie Strong and his football coaches been doing since the end of the 2014 football season?

The answer to that question is evidently NOTHING AT ALL!

On top of that Texas has a QB that would be lucky to run SIXTH string on the Coaches Hot Seat Flag-Football team who from where we sit has NO DAMN ABILITY to lead anyone to do anything which really makes us wonder what exactly is going on at Texas right now because it may be the case that…

Charlie Strong and the Texas assistant football coaches…

Don’t Have A Freaking Clue!

Now at 0 – 1 here is what Texas has left on the schedule in 2015:

Rice
California
Oklahoma State
At TCU
Oklahoma
Kansas State
At Iowa State
Kansas
At West Virginia
Texas Tech
At Baylor

Hell…there is a REAL chance that Texas….YES Texas…IF the Longhorns play like they did against Notre Dame will…

NOT win another football game in 2015!

Memo to Charlie Strong: If your Texas football team loses to Rice and California and you then lose to Oklahoma State, TCU and Oklahoma you will be fired before the Iowa State game so here’s a thought for you Charlie…

We would recommend your football team actually show-up against a Rice team that checking the Owls roster does not have ONE player on their team that Texas recruited!

YES…this Saturday’s game against Rice at home in Austin is the BIGGEST game of Charlie Strong’s coaching career because with a loss in this spot to the Owls it will only be a matter of WHEN and not IF Charlie Strong will be fired in Austin so we would recommend someone on the Texas coaching staff get the attention of the Texas football players before Saturday!

9. Al Golden, Miami – Al Golden and Miami did what they had to do in Week 1 and beat Bethune-Cookman by a score of 45 – 0 and now the 2015 college football season begins for Al Golden and Miami with a trip to play FAU in Boca Raton in a game that Al Golden and Miami…

CANNOT LOSE!

Lose to FAU with Nebraska and a game at Cincinnati left on the non-conference schedule before starting ACC play at Florida State and Al Golden will be in a Helluva HOT spot for the rest of the 2015 college football season!

10. Derek Mason, Vanderbilt – In a home game against Western Kentucky that Derek Mason and Vanderbilt HAD TO WIN the Commodores lost to WKU and now Derek Mason is really in a Helluva spot with Georgia coming to Nashville this Saturday. We will say that Vanderbilt looked better on defense and better on offense against Western Kentucky than in the 2014 season BUT the margin for error is very small for Derek Mason and he will probably need 4 or maybe 5 wins to return for the 2016 season and with that let’s take a look at what Vanderbilt has left on the schedule in 2015:

Georgia
Austin Peay
At Ole Miss
At Middle Tennessee
At South Carolina
Missouri
At Houston
At Florida
Kentucky
Texas A&M
At Tennessee

Geez….can Derek Mason and Vanderbilt really find four or maybe five wins playing the above remaining games?

We would be STUNNED if Vanderbilt wins four or five games in 2015 is our answer to that question!

11 – 30 Post Week 1 Hot Seat Coaches Analysis Coming Soon!

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Al Golden, Charlie Strong, Coaches Hot Seat, Coaches Hot Seat Rankings, Darrell Hazell, Derek Mason, Georgia State, Indiana, Iowa State, Kevin Wilson, Miami, Mike London, Paul Rhoads, Purdue, Southern Miss, Texas, Todd Monken, Trent Miles, Vanderbilt, Virginia

Coaches Hot Seat Quotes of the Day – Tuesday, September 8, 2015 – John McEnroe

Harry September 8, 2015 0 Comments

“I think it’s the mark of a great player to be confident in tough situations.”

And

“The important thing is to learn a lesson every time you lose. Life is a learning process and you have to try to learn what’s best for you. Let me tell you, life is not fun when you’re banging your head against a brick wall all the time.”

And

“What is the single most important quality in a tennis champion? I would have to say desire, staying in there and winning matches when you are not playing that well.”

And

“I’ll let the racket do the talking.”

And

“I’d like to think I could have and should have won more, but that’s not the point. And I was at the point where I was playing great tennis in the mid 80s – the type of tennis people hadn’t seen before – and I was very proud of that.”

And

“If, in a few months, I’m only number 8 or number 10 in the world, I’ll have to look at what off-the-court work I can do. I will need to do something if I want to be number 1.”

And

“Everybody loves success, but they hate successful people”

Wikipedia Page: John McEnroe

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Coaches Hot Seat Quotes of the Day – Monday, September 7, 2015 – Walt Disney

Harry September 7, 2015 0 Comments

“A man should never neglect his family for business.”

And

“All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them.”

And

“All the adversity I’ve had in my life, all my troubles and obstacles, have strengthened me… You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you.”

And

“Disneyland is a work of love. We didn’t go into Disneyland just with the idea of making money.”

And

“I do not like to repeat successes, I like to go on to other things.”

And

“I have been up against tough competition all my life. I wouldn’t know how to get along without it.”

And

“I’d say it’s been my biggest problem all my life… it’s money. It takes a lot of money to make these dreams come true.”

And

“If you can dream it, you can do it.”

And

“It’s kind of fun to do the impossible.”

And

“Laughter is America’s most important export.”

And

“Of all the things I’ve done, the most vital is coordinating those who work with me and aiming their efforts at a certain goal.”

And

“The way to get started is to quit talking and begin doing.”

And

“We keep moving forward, opening new doors, and doing new things, because we’re curious and curiosity keeps leading us down new paths.”

And

“When you believe in a thing, believe in it all the way, implicitly and unquestionable.”

And

“When you’re curious, you find lots of interesting things to do.”

And

“You can design and create, and build the most wonderful place in the world. But it takes people to make the dream a reality.”

And

“You may not realize it when it happens, but a kick in the teeth may be the best thing in the world for you.”

And

“You reach a point where you don’t work for money.”

And

“Over at our place, we’re sure of just one thing: everybody in the world was once a child. So in planning a new picture, we don’t think of grown-ups, and we don’t think of children, but just of that fine, clean, unspoiled spot down deep in every one of us that maybe the world has made us forget and that maybe our pictures can help recall.”

And

“Once a man has tasted freedom he will never be content to be a slave. That is why I believe that this frightfulness we see everywhere today is only temporary. Tomorrow will be better for as long as America keeps alive the ideals of freedom and a better life. All men will want to be free and share our way of life. There must be so much that I should have said, but haven’t. What I will say now is just what most of us are probably thinking every day. I thank God and America for the right to live and raise my family under the flag of tolerance, democracy and freedom.” Radio Address, March 1941

And

“I suppose my formula might be: dream, diversify and never miss an angle.”

And

“A person should set his goals as early as he can and devote all his energy and talent to getting there. With enough effort, he may achieve it. Or he may find something that is even more rewarding. But in the end, no matter what the outcome, he will know he has been alive.”

And

“There is more treasure in books than in all the pirates’ loot on Treasure Island and at the bottom of the Spanish Main… and best of all, you can enjoy these riches every day of your life.”

And

“I could never convince the financiers that Disneyland was feasible, because dreams offer too little collateral.”

And

“Courage is the main quality of leadership, in my opinion, no matter where it is exercised. Usually it implies some risk — especially in new undertakings. Courage to initiate something and to keep it going, pioneering and adventurous spirit to blaze new ways, often, in our land of opportunity.”

And

“I do not make films primarily for children. I make them for the child in all of us, whether we be six or sixty. Call the child “innocence”. The worst of us is not without innocence, although buried deeply it might be. In my work I try to reach and speak to that innocence, showing it the fun and joy of living; showing it that laughter is healthy; showing it that the human species, although happily ridiculous at times, is still reaching for the stars.”

And

“When I started on Disneyland, my wife used to say, “But why do you want to build an amusement park? They’re so dirty.” I told her that was just the point — mine wouldn’t be.”

And

“Every person has his own ideas of the act of praying for God’s guidance, tolerance, and mercy to fulfill his duties and responsibilities. My own concept of prayer is not as a plea for special favors nor as a quick palliation for wrongs knowingly committed. A prayer, it seems to me, implies a promise as well as a request; at the highest level, prayer not only is a supplication for strength and guidance, but also becomes an affirmation of life and thus a reverent praise of God.”

And

“I have long felt that the way to keep children out of trouble is to keep them interested in things. Lecturing to children is no answer to delinquency. Preaching won’t keep youngsters out of trouble, but keeping their minds occupied will.”

And

“Actually, if you could see close in my eyes, the American flag is waving in both of them and up my spine is growing this red, white and blue stripe.”

And

“That’s the real trouble with the world, too many people grow up. They forget. They don’t remember what it’s like to be twelve years old. They patronize; they treat children as inferiors. I won’t do that. I’ll temper a story, yes. But I won’t play down, and I won’t patronize.”

And

“To the youngsters of today, I say believe in the future, the world is getting better; there still is plenty of opportunity. Why, would you believe it, when I was a kid I thought it was already too late for me to make good at anything.”

And

“Leadership means that a group, large or small, is willing to entrust authority to a person who has shown judgement, wisdom, personal appeal, and proven competence.”

And

“Do a good job. You don’t have to worry about the money; it will take care of itself. Just do your best work — then try to trump it.”

And

“I believe firmly in the efficacy of religion, in its powerful influence on a person’s whole life. It helps immeasurably to meet the storms and stress of life and keep you attuned to the Divine inspiration. Without inspiration, we would perish.”

Wikipedia: Walt Disney

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Coaches Hot Seat Quotes of the Day – Sunday, September 6, 2015 – Marcus Aurelius

Harry September 6, 2015 0 Comments

“A man should be upright, not be kept upright.”

And

“A man’s worth is no greater than his ambitions.”

And

“Accept the things to which fate binds you, and love the people with whom fate brings you together, but do so with all your heart.”

And

“Be content with what you are, and wish not change; nor dread your last day, nor long for it.”

And

“Because your own strength is unequal to the task, do not assume that it is beyond the powers of man; but if anything is within the powers and province of man, believe that it is within your own compass also.”

And

“Dig within. Within is the wellspring of Good; and it is always ready to bubble up, if you just dig.”

And

“Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact. Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth.”

And

“If it is not right do not do it; if it is not true do not say it.”

And

“It is not death that a man should fear, but he should fear never beginning to live.”

And

“Let men see, let them know, a real man, who lives as he was meant to live.”

And

“Life is neither good or evil, but only a place for good and evil.”

And

“Look back over the past, with its changing empires that rose and fell, and you can foresee the future, too.”

And

“Never let the future disturb you. You will meet it, if you have to, with the same weapons of reason which today arm you against the present.”

And

“Nothing has such power to broaden the mind as the ability to investigate systematically and truly all that comes under thy observation in life.”

And

“Observe constantly that all things take place by change, and accustom thyself to consider that the nature of the Universe loves nothing so much as to change the things which are, and to make new things like them.”

And

“The secret of all victory lies in the organization of the non-obvious.”

And

“Tomorrow is nothing, today is too late; the good lived yesterday.”

And

“Very little is needed to make a happy life; it is all within yourself, in your way of thinking.”

And

“When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive – to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love.”

And

“Remember that man lives only in the present, in this fleeting instant; all the rest of his life is either past and gone, or not yet revealed.”

And

“At dawn of day, when you dislike being called, have this thought ready: “I am called to man’s labour; why then do I make a difficulty if I am going out to do what I was born to do and what I was brought into the world for?”

And

“Everything–a horse, a vine–is created for some duty…For what task, then, were you yourself created? A man’s true delight is to do the things he was made for.”

Wikipedia: Marcus Aurelius

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