Tag Archive: Bret Bielema

Post Week 8 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

Harry October 24, 2017 0 Comments

Post Week 8 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

Thanks Mr. Cash!

1. Butch Jones, Tennessee – The overall record for Butch Jones at Tennessee is bad enough…

33 – 25

….in his FIFTH year on the job but it’s Jones record in SEC Conference play that is the reason he’s headed for the chopping block…

14 – 22

…with these games still left to be played in 2017:

At Kentucky
Southern Miss
At Missouri
LSU
Vanderbilt

Yep…even if Butch Jones and his Vols won their last 4 SEC Conference games his record in SEC play would still just be…

18 – 22

….and there’s No Chance In Hell that fans of Tennessee Football should tolerate Butch Jones’ SEC record and thus that’s why the Vols will have a new head football coach come 2018!

Our guess…Tennessee finishes with a 4 – 8 record in 2017 and a Total Damn Mess on its hands as the folks in Knoxville try to figure out where to go next….here’s a tip for Tennessee AD John Currie when considering who to hire as the next head football coach at Tennessee:

Imagine in your mind’s eye Nick Saban’s reaction to hearing the name of the person who Tennessee hired to be its next head football coach. Is Nick smiling, does he have no reaction, does he grunt and think that maybe the Vols will be a tough win now. Don’t hire the coach that makes Nick Saban smile Currie!

2. Bret Bielema, Arkansas – With the loss to Auburn on Saturday Bret Bielema’s record in SEC play in his FIFTH year on the job is now at…

10 – 26

….which is a winning percentage of…

.278

…and the previous two head coaches at Arkansas Houston Nutt and Bobby Petrino posted a combined winning percentage in SEC Conference play of…

.527

Considering the above there is a very good argument that could be made that Bret Bielema is the…

WORST HIRE

…in the SEC Conference since the end of World War II which would mean Arkansas AD Jeff Long has hired as the head coach of the Razorbacks:

Bobby Petrino – Wouldn’t hire to wash our cars!
John L. Smith – Only an insane person would hire John L. Smith!
Bret Bielema – The WORST hire in SEC since end of World War II!

Now at 2 – 5 on the season Arkansas still has to play this season games against…

At Ole Miss
Coastal Carolina
At LSU
Mississippi State
Missouri

…and there is a very real chance that the Hogs finish with just THREE wins in Bret Bielema’s FIFTH year on the job in Fayetteville!

Got fire the whole Damn Arkansas athletic department?

You do if you don’t want Arkansas Football Totally Destroyed!

3. David Beaty, Kansas – It was just Stupid at Kansas but after the Jayhawks 43 – 0 loss to TCU the week after losing to Iowa State 45 – 0 it’s just…

Who gives a Damn about Kansas Football?

…and the answer to that question would be…NO ONE AT ALL!

David Beaty is in his THIRD season at Kansas and his records are…

Overall: 3 – 28

Big 12: 1 – 21

…and if Beaty isn’t fired before December 1 then why in the Hell is Kansas even bothering to play football?

Same goes for Kansas AD Sheahon Zenger who hired Charlie Weis and David Beaty and if Zenger worked in the Real World and not on a college campus his ass would have been…

Fired Long Ago!

4. Mike Riley, Nebraska – Mike Riley had a good week in the bye week because the Huskers didn’t get their ass whipped and now the 3 – 4 Huskers travel to play a decent Purdue team that somehow just lost to Rutgers and if Nebraska loses this game it will be because the Husker players have…

Flat-Out Quit

….but there are many here at Coaches Hot Seat that believe a lot of Husker football players Flat-Out Quit against Ohio State!

3 – 4 Nebraska has left in 2017….

At Purdue
Northwestern
At Minnesota
At Penn State
Iowa

….which looks to us like a losing season for the Huskers but Mike Riley had 5 losing seasons in 14 seasons coaching at Oregon State…including the season before he was hired at Nebraska…which makes one wonder…

Why in the Hell was Mike Riley hired at Nebraska?

Because former Nebraska Athletic Director Shawn Eichorst doesn’t know his ass from the side of a barn…that’s why!

5. Lovie Smith, Illinois – With the Illini’s loss to Minnesota on Saturday Lovie Smith’s records at Illinois now stand at…

Overall: 5 – 14

Big Ten: 2 – 11

…and those 5 wins were over:

Murray State
Rutgers
Michigan State
Ball State
Western Kentucky

Please….can someone….anyone…tell us why Lovie Smith is the head football coach at Illinois?

Didn’t think so!

6. Jim Harbaugh, Michigan – A few Coaches Hot Seat members were there on the day that Jim Harbaugh was introduced as the new head football coach at Stanford in December 2006 and we were there when Stanford beat USC in Jimmy’s first season in early October 2006 at the LA Coliseum and we were there for ALL of Jimmy’s FOUR seasons on The Farm and thus we believe we know Jimmy Harbaugh very well!

With the above in mind it’s obvious to us that something is…

Terribly Wrong at Michigan

….and it goes beyond Jimmy’s record in his last 11 games which is by the way…

6 – 5

…and we are not going to pretend we know what is going but there’s something….

Terribly Wrong at Michigan

…in our humble opinion of course!

Most surprising of all to us here at Coaches Hot Seat who watched Jim Harbaugh recruit Andrew Luck and several other solid quarterbacks to Stanford when the 2017 season kicked-off Michigan didn’t have a FBS-level QB on its roster which begs the question?

What the Hell is going on Jimmy?

Well let’s see here….watching replays of Michigan’s games against Michigan State and Penn State we have come to the following conclusions about the Wolverines offense = Jim Harbaugh’s offense:

1. Michigan doesn’t have a FBS-level QB on its roster. Hell, Michigan doesn’t have a college-level QB on its roster. Hell, Michigan doesn’t have a high school level QB on its roster! Yes…that’s a Helluva problem Jimmy!

2. The Michigan Offensive line could be easily whipped in a fist fight by 3…maybe even 2…members of Coaches Hot Seat and as a group there is not a bigger group of Candy Asses in America…save the Candy Ass Tech Boys in Silicon Valley…than the Michigan Offensive Line. Yes…that’s a Helluva problem Jimmy!

3. The Michigan Running Backs and Wide Receivers are hardly coached at all and if they are coached the coaches that are coaching them should be fired…like this afternoon! SOFT and LAZY are the words that come to mind when we think of the Michigan Running Backs and Wide Receivers and…Yes, that’s a Helluva problem Jimmy!

4. The Michigan offensive play-calling in one word is…SHIT! Make that TOTAL SHIT..and Yes, that’s a Helluva problem Jimmy!

Besides all of the above you have a pretty decent offense at Michigan this season Jimmy!

Michigan is now 5 – 2 in 2017 and still has the below games left on their schedule:

Rutgers
Minnesota
At Maryland
At Wisconsin
Ohio State

Hell….Michigan might only win 2…maybe 3…more games in 2017 which is Jim Harbaugh’s THIRD year on the job and we only have the following to say to Jimmy Harbaugh:

Get your Damn ass together Son or your head coaching career is going to be over in a flash!

7. Kalani Sitake, BYU – The calls from our Mormon friends in Utah started about four weeks ago after Utah State beat BYU by the score of…

40 – 24

…and if you have Mormon friends then you know….

These folks don’t complain about ANYTHING

…and yet their calls keep coming and they are saying things like….

“You just cannot believe what is going on behind the scenes of BYU football.”

“BYU football is just the biggest mess you can possible imagine.”

“I am shocked about what I am being told is going on in Provo.”

At first we didn’t know what to think but after BYU lost to East Carolina..one of the worst teams in FBS football…on Saturday by the score of…

33 – 17

…we are now convinced after doing some checking of our own that BYU Football is in a Meltdown for the Ages in the history of college football in America and that the Cougars might not win another game this season even with some very weak teams left on their schedule:

San Jose State
At Fresno State
At UNLV
UMass
At Hawaii

Because the information we have gathered is second-hand we are not going to write our opinion on what is going on with BYU Football but we will say this…if the current trend continues….BYU may very well have a new head football coach come December and the Kalani Sitake era at BYU will be over before it really even got started.

8. Kliff Kingsbury, Texas Tech – If there was one thing that Kliff Kingsbury could not have let happened in Year FIVE as the head coach at Texas Tech was let Iowa State come into Lubbock and whip his Red Raiders on Homecoming weekend which leaves Kingsbury’s records now at…

Overall: 28 – 29

Big 12: 14 – 26

…and Texas Tech now at 4 – 3 on the season still having to play these teams:

At Oklahoma
Kansas State
Baylor
TCU
At Texas

Damn….it’s going to be mighty hard for Texas Tech to get to 6 wins on the season and less than 6 wins in 2017 and Kingsbury will have posted…

3 Losing Seasons in 5 Years on the Job

….which even at Texas Tech will get your ass fired…right?

Right!

Since it seems obvious that now member of TCU coaching staff Sonny Dykes would be a natural fit as the head coach at Texas Tech we would recommend that Kingsbury find a way to get to at least SEVEN wins in 2017 or more than likely the folks in Lubbock will be hiring them a new head football coach December.

9. Larry Fedora, North Carolina – After North Carolina’s 59 – 7 loss to Virginia Tech on Saturday one has to wonder if the Tar Heels have totally quit on head coach Larry Fedora or maybe this is just God’s way of getting justice against the North Carolina Athletic Department which somehow was able to get away with…

Totally Not Monitoring the Academic Activities of its Athletes

…for decades but whatever the reason for the current slide of UNC Football there is one thing we know for sure….

North Carolina is getting its ass-whipped on a regular basis in 2017 and either Larry Fedora will fix this mess in Chapel Hill or his ass should and will get run right out of town!

North Carolina is now 1 – 7 on the season and has left to play…

Miami
At Pitt
Western Carolina
At NC State

Got 2 – 10 Larry?

You are about to have it Son!

10. Jim McElwain, Florida – It seems that Jim McElwain’s luck is finally running out which began long before he got the head coaching job at Florida and actually began when Nick Saban plucked Jimmy from Fresno State to be the offensive coordinator at Alabama where…

Any Damn Moron can get the Alabama offense to score 30+ points a game

…which then led to Jimmy getting the Colorado State job where he did some decent work and then the Florida job where Jimmy was fortunate enough to arrive in Gainesville when the SEC East was the weakest it has been since the SEC went to two divisions BUT Oh those days are over and on Saturday the 3 – 3 Gators get to play a Georgia Football team that is actually a…

Georgia Football Team

…and by late Saturday night the Gators will no doubt be 3 – 4 with these games still left on the schedule:

At Missouri
At South Carolina
UBA
Florida State

Hell…Florida will be lucky to win 6 games in 2017 and thus it looks like Jim McElwain will be on the Hot Seat for the foreseeable future.

Oh and here’s something else Jimmy..not only could Any Damn Moron get the Alabama offense to score 30+ points a game…

Any Damn Moron can win 8 games a year at Florida!

Personally we like Jim McElwain and ran into him a couple of times when he was with the Oakland Raiders in 2006 and in the Flathead Valley of Montana where we are almost every Summer for a fishing trip BUT Jimmy if you are presented with a good head coaching job offer at another Power 5 school in the coming weeks…you might want to consider it Jimmy because things are about to get really HOT in Gainesville not withstanding whatever Yahoos have been sending you and your players death threats which should be turned over to the police immediately!

Coach ‘Em Up Jimmy!

Uncategorized

Alabama, Arkansas, Bret Bielema, Butch Jones, BYU, David Beaty, Florida, Georgia, Illinois, Jim Harbaugh, Jim McElwain, Kalani Sitake, Kansas, Kliff Kingsbury, Larry Fedora, Lovie Smith, Michigan, Mike Riley, Nebraska, Nick Saban, North Carolina, SEC, Tennessee, Texas Tech, UNC, UNJC

Post Week 7 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash! – The Best Land Under Heaven: The Donner Party in the Age of Manifest Destiny

Harry October 16, 2017 0 Comments

Before we get to the Post Week 7 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings the members of Coaches Hot Seat have been reading a GREAT book the last few weeks which will give anyone a great perspective on life and one’s relative lack of luck in their lives on this Earth. The book is…

The Best Land Under Heaven: The Donner Party in the Age of Manifest Destiny, Michael Wallis, Amazon.com

…and not only does the above book provide an amazing history of the trials and tribulations of the Donner Party’s trip from the Midwest to California in 1846, it weaves into the story many important parts of American history that will change how you view our Great Country. As the great Civil War author and historian Shelby Foote has rightly said…

“One cannot understand America without understanding the US Civil War.”

…one cannot also really understand America without knowing about the massive movement of Americans to the West in the middle of the 19 th Century before and after gold was found in California in 1849.

The main lesson though we got from the book The Best Land Under Heaven is that no matter how bad things are in our lives they could be a Helluva lot worse which brings some great perspective to our daily lives and with that in mind let’s get to the latest ranking of multi-millionaire college head coaches on the Hot Seat who haven’t a care in the world beyond their asses now being lit-up!

Post Week 7 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

Thank Johnny!

1. Butch Jones, Tennessee – If Butch Jones hadn’t committed so many verbal and personal gaffes at Tennessee the last five seasons he might have a fighting chance to survive to coach the Vols in 2018 with plenty of winnable games left on the schedule but after back-to-back home losses to Georgia and South Carolina it’s all but over for one of the most disliked men in Tennessee football history.

There’s an art + science to a college head football coach winning over both his football team and fan base and Butch Jones has amazingly alienated both to varying degrees at Tennessee and thus Butch has all but given up an important thing for coaches….”the benefit of the doubt”…when things get tough and with Alabama on deck for the 3 – 3 Vols Jones has now worked himself into a position where he better Damn have Chubby Boy in Memphis looking for an exit door to another head coaching job IF Jones wants to coach next season.

Here’s what Tennessee has left in 2017:

At Alabama
At Kentucky
Southern Miss
At Missouri
LSU
Vanderbilt

Our guess the Vols win 6 or 7 games at best in 2017 and there’s not a chance in Hell Butch Jones will survive that in Year 5 in Knoxville so the attention now turns to who will be the next head football coach at Tennessee which will be one of the most interesting hires in the upcoming weeks.

2. Bret Bielema, Arkansas – If there is one thing we really distrust at Coaches Hot Seat it is anything categorized as a “slam-dunk” and Bret Bielema was described as such when hired at Arkansas in 2013 and yet here we are FIVE years later and Bielema now has on the board:

Overall: 27 – 30

SEC: 10 – 25

Nope….Bret Bielema was NOT a “slam-dunk” hire at Arkansas and in reality Bielema has made a Helluva lot of bad decisions in Fayetteville primarily around assistant coaches he has hired + failed to keep which is richly ironic since one of the reasons some claimed Bielema took the Arkansas job was that he couldn’t get more money for his assistants at Wisconsin! Bret Bielema has had ALL the Damn Money and Resources he has needed or possibly wanted at Arkansas and yet his record in SEC play is…

10 – 25

….so please don’t tell us Bielema hasn’t had every Damn chance to win games in Fayetteville because the reality is he has had EVERYTHING and he has FAILED miserably!

What is really scary at Arkansas is that there are otherwise smart people like Arky AD Jeff Long who don’t have the ability to admit they were “wrong” or even to make it clear that expectations at Arkansas are a Helluva lot higher than what Bielema has been not achieving with the Hogs and what a great lesson this is for everyone who should learn from this situation that…

When Wrong…Admit You Are Wrong…Learn From Your Mistakes…and Move the Hell On To Fixing the Damn Problem!

Instead Arkansas AD Jeff Long is in deep denial about Bret Bielema but then why wouldn’t Long be in denial since after all he has hired as head football coaches at Arky that in the end turned out to be…

Bobby Petrino – Total Damn Disaster
John L. Smith – Total Damn Disaster
Bret Bielema – Total Damn Disaster

Some may argue that Bobby Petrino won a Helluva lot of games at Arkansas, but there is not a chance in Hell we would have hired Petrino then or today to wash our cars because we have standards somewhere way the Hell north of Jeff Long and the University of Arkansas and when you set your standards low no one should be surprised that your ass ends up looking like a fool when a motorcycle accident happens!

After the loss to Alabama the 2 – 4 Hogs now have left on the schedule…

Auburn
At Ole Miss
Coastal Carolina
At LSU
Mississippi State
Missouri

…and does anyone with a working brain think Arkansas can win 4 of their last 6 games to get to even a .500 record in Bielema’s FIFTH year on the job?

Nope and that is why fans of Arkansas Football have one choice and one choice only…

Fire AD Jeff Long AND Head Coach Bret Bielema

…or let your football program be totally destroyed!

It’s YOUR choice fans of Arkansas Football!

3. David Beaty, Kansas – Things are getting Very Damn Stupid at the University of Kansas and we write that because KU AD Sheahon Zenger has hired two head football coaches….Charlie Weis and David Beaty….and their combined records the last SIX seasons stands at:

Overall: 9 – 49

Big 12: 2 – 38

Geez….can someone explain to us how Kansas AD Sheahon Zenger is still employed in Lawrence?

Oh…current Kansas head coach David Beaty’s records are now…

Overall: 3 – 27

Big 12: 1 – 20

..and the 1 – 5 Jayhawks still have to play in 2017….

At TCU
Kansas State
Baylor
At Texas
Oklahoma
Oklahoma State

…which looks to us like a 1 – 11 record in Beaty’s THIRD season on the job.

Can ANY head football coach and the AD that hired him survive the above records?

Not in the Real World but is the University of Kansas part of the Real World?

Not really it seems!

4. Mike Riley, Nebraska – The Cold Hard Reality of Mike Riley’s tenure at Nebraska are his records which after the Total Debacle home loss to Ohio State now stand at…

Overall: 18 – 15

Big Ten: 11 – 10

….which would get ANY coach fired in Lincoln and now there really is nothing that can save Riley’s job barring the Yellowstone Supervolcano erupting and ending all life on Earth!

With the above reality in mind it will be interesting to see who new Nebraska AD Bill Moos hires to replace Mike Riley between now and early December and we would be stunned if Moos tried to bring Washington State head coach Mike Leach to Lincoln since our friends in the Great State of Nebraska that we checked with aren’t really into a…

Head Coach blaming his players when HIS team gets its ass whipped as Washington State got whipped by California on Friday night!

…but then who the Hell wants a coach that gives blame when HIS team loses and takes credit when THEY win? As Paul “Bear” Bryant rightly said and which no doubt the Great Tom Osborne would agree with…

“If anything goes bad, I did it. If anything goes semi-good, we did it. If anything goes really good, then you did it. That’s all it takes to get people to win football games for you.”

….which Mike Leach has turned on its head by essentially saying to his players:

When things go right I get the credit and when thing go wrong YOU get the blame!

Who in the Hell would want his Son playing for a coach that believes that kind of Total and Non-American Excuse Making Bullshit and where exactly was Mike Leach raised because Real Americans don’t raise Total Asses that care little about anything but their own Precious Ass?

Pitiful Mike Leach…just So Damn Pitiful and if you lost a couple more games it will be a Damn Pleasure to roast your Sorry and Pitiful Ass Mike!

The obvious choice of the next head coach at Nebraska is of course UCF HC Scott Frost but Frost might have several attractive offers to choose from in the coming weeks and if Frost does decide to go elsewhere Moos will have a career defining job to do that will determine the future fate of Nebraska Football so no pressure at all Bill and Good Luck to you in the new job as well!

5. Barry Odom, Missouri – After the loss to Georgia on Saturday Mizzou head coach Barry’s Odom’s records now stand at…

Overall: 5 – 13

SEC: 2 – 10

….and the 1 – 5 Tigers still have to play in 2017:

Idaho
At UConn
Florida
Tennessee
At Vanderbilt
At Arkansas

…and our guess is that Mizzou wins 3….maybe 4 games…this season and that would be 4 wins or less TWO straight seasons and nothing short of a…

Total and Complete Disaster for Mizzou Football!

6. Jim Mora, UCLA – For some reason between the 2015 and 2016 football seasons they quit teaching the UCLA Bruins football players how to tackle in Westwood and “Surprise – Surprise”…NOT…. in the last two seasons the Bruins under Jim Mora have posted records of…

Overall: 7 – 11

Pac-12: 3 – 8

….and now at 3 – 3 after the loss to Arizona what is still left on the schedule in 2017 is…

Oregon
At Washington
At Utah
Arizona State
At USC
California

….which looks like SIX wins at best for Mora & Company and is that acceptable to the folks at UCLA in Mora’s SIXTH year on the job?

It might just be!

7. Todd Graham, Arizona State – Congratulations to Todd Graham and his Arizona State football team on beating the Mighty Washington Huskies which for some reason looked unprepared and borderline un-coached in Tempe on Saturday night….What’s Up With That Pete?….and with that win over the Huskies the 3 – 3 Sun Devils have to keep things rolling because head coach Graham needs 7+ wins to hang onto this job and here is what ASU still has in front of them this season:

At Utah
USC
Colorado
At UCLA
At Oregon State
Arizona

One of the toughest things for a college head football coach is to get his team down from the HIGH of a beating a top-ranked team and Todd Graham has his work cut-out for him in getting the Sun Devils re-focused to play a very tough Utah team in Salt Lake City on Saturday because a loss to the Utes on Saturday and Graham will be moving right back up the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings again!

8. Gus Malzahn, Auburn – In a season where Auburn head coach Gus Malzahn needs no more than 4 losses AND a win over either Georgia or Alabama to save his job losing two games to Clemson and LSU with Georgia and Alabama still left on the schedule is definitely Not A Good Thing and the calculus for Malzahn is that he has NO margin for error between now and the first of December with the 5 – 2 Tigers still having to play games against…

At Arkansas
At Texas A&M
Georgia
La. Monroe
Alabama

Bottom-Line:

If Gus Malzahn loses to Georgia and Alabama to finish at 8 – 4 he’s DONE at Auburn

If Gus Malzahn loses another game but beats either Georgia and Alabama to finish at 8 – 4 he HAS A CHANCE at Auburn

Yep…this is about Gus Malzahn winning at least one of the two games against Georgia and Alabama and we would recommend that Malzahn and his Tigers not lose either of the next two games before Georgia comes to The Plains on November 11 because that would put Gus into a borderline impossible spot so…

Coach Hard Gus because your job in on the line EVERY week Son!

9. Lovie Smith, Illinois – Can someone…anyone…explain to us why Lovie Smith is the head football coach at Illinois?

No one can explain to us why Lovie Smith is the head coach at Illinois?

Didn’t think so and now after nothing short of a Total Disaster of a loss to Rutgers at home which came into the game with 16 straight Big Ten Conference losses Lovie Smith’s records with the Illini now stand at…

Overall: 5 – 13

Big Ten: 2 – 10

…and they still have to play this season:

At Minnesota
Wisconsin
At Purdue
Indiana
At Ohio State
Northwestern

Hell…will Illinois win another game in 2017?

Hell..even if they do win 1 or 2 of their last 6 games to finish at 3 – 9 or 4 – 8 how could Lovie Smith stay employed at Illinois?

The reality is that there are some coaches that are Pro Coaches and there are some coaches that are College Coaches and then there are a TINY amount of coaches that can coach both Pro and College players and if there is one thing that coaches that have successfully coached in both the Pro and College games…think Jimmy Johnson and Pete Carroll…it is they have…

PASSION

…for the Great Game of Football and thus can motivate 18 – 22 year old kids and Lovie Smith seems to us to be…

Barely Awake Even During the Games

….so Please…how in the Hell can Lovie Smith ever win a Damn thing at Illinois?

Eventually Lovie Smith will be fired at Illinois because there’s not a chance in Hell he will ever make the Illini competitive in the Uber-competitive Big Ten Conference and when the firing of a coach is inevitable it’s ALWAYS best to get on with the firing which is something the AD at Illinois will either understand now or learn eventually in the next year or so!

10. Steve Addazio, Boston College – Steve Addazio’s BC team beat Louisville on Saturday which was nice win BUT beating this year’s Louisville team is not going to be that big of a deal come the end of the season because Louisville couldn’t stop the prison team from the original The Longest Yard movie and with that win Addazio’s Eagles improved to 3 – 4 in 2017 with these games still left to be played…

At Virginia
Florida State
NC State
UConn
At Syracuse

Unlike Louisville most of the above teams actually play DEFENSE and thus we fully expect BC to finish with a losing record in 2017 and for Steve Addazio to lose his job come late November – early December because with these records on the board…

Overall: 27 – 31

ACC: 12 – 24

…how could Addazio possibly keep his job with another losing season this year?

Uncategorized

Alabama, Arizona State, Arkansas, Auburn, Barry Odom, BC, Big Ten, Bill Moos, Bobby Petrino, Boston College, Bret Bielema, Butch Jones, Charlie Weis, Chris Petersen, David Beaty, Georgia, Gus Malzahn, Illinois, Jeff Long, Jim Mora, Kansas, Lousiville, Lovie Smith, Mike Leach, Mike Riley, Missouri, Nebraska, SEC, Sheahon Zenger, Steve Addazio, Tennessee, Todd Graham, UCLA, Washington, Washington State, Westwood

2017 Post Week 6 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – Tom Petty + Stevie Nicks Learning To Fly – Thanks Tom and Godspeed Son! – Johnny Cash Giving The Hot Seat Coaches Hell! – Welcome To The Hot Seat Lincoln Riley…Head Coach of the Charmin Very Damn Soft Oklahoma Sooners!

Harry October 9, 2017 0 Comments

We can’t start Week 7 of the 2017 College Football Season without first recognizing the passing of the Great Tom Petty who was always teaching us how to fly in life!

Learning To Fly, Tom Petty and his 40+ year friend Stevie Nicks!

Thank You Tom for your amazing music and God Speed To You Son…Your Music Will Live Forever!

Post Week 6 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

Thank You Mr. Cash!

1. Bret Bielema, Arkansas – In the last decade-plus we have written a lot in this Coaches Hot Seat Blog about the importance of Athletic Directors making Damn sure they hire head football coaches that “fit” the culture and history of the school the AD words for, but this is the first time we have written about something just as important:

Coaches taking jobs where they “fit” the culture and history of the school.

A handful of Coaches Hot Seat members have stopped in at Madison, Wisconsin a few times while on business trips in the Great State of Wisconsin and even been to a couple Wisconsin Badgers football games and on one of those trips a few years ago when Bret Bielema was still the head coach of the Badgers there was a story we read about how Bielema liked to drive around in his SUV on Gameday Saturdays in Madison before the games to see what all the Wisconsin fans were up to with most of those fans not knowing it was the UW head coach in that SUV. When reading that story we just laughed at it because it was classic Bret Bielema and in our minds not knowing about any potential issues that were going on between Wisconsin AD Barry Alvarez and Bret Bielema we always thought that Bret was a good “fit” at Wisconsin and that he would be there until he got his ass fired or he retired.

As you can imagine with the above in mind everyone at Coaches Hot Seat was shocked when in early December 2012 it was announced that Bret Bielema was leaving Wisconsin for the Arkansas head coaching job which made no sense on many levels and like a lot of other people made us think that Barry Alvarez must be one Helluva asshole to work for and if the media reports are true Cheap As Hell when it comes to paying Wisconsin assistant coaches since after all…Not A Damn Dime of the money that Barry Alvarez pays Wisconsin Athletic Department employees with is Barry’s money! Whatever the issues were between Alvarez and Bielema it blew-up a pretty good arrangement for the both of them which later happened again with Alvarez and current Oregon State head coach Gary Andersen who also must be a Real American Man and doesn’t like being led around by the nose from a former football coach who doesn’t seem to know that Real Leaders hire people to do jobs and they…

Let Them Do Their Job!

Leaving Barry Alvarez aside for the moment who in our opinion is a Pompous Arrogant Ass that believes he spun up the entire universe and thus everyone should kiss Barry’s Precious Big Ass….Sorry Barry but your are not God Son and hopefully one day the Lord himself will let you know that personally….let’s get back to Bret Bielema at Arkansas which on so many levels for both Arkansas and Bielema made just no Damn sense and we write that because early on a long-time friend + Arkansas-alum called us in Bielema’s first year at Arkansas in the Fall of 2013 and said something like (paraphrasing since it was so long ago):

“It’s just not going to work with Bielema. He just doesn’t get Arkansas…the people…the culture…nor the football…but it will take a long-time for some of my friends to understand that…a really long time.”

Well, it’s now Bret Bielema’s FIFTH year as the head coach at Arkansas and in his 56 th game as the head coach of the Razorbacks his team just got their ass whipped by the score of…

48 – 22

….by a decent but still average South Carolina team which leaves Bielema’s records at….

Overall: 27 – 29

SEC: 10 – 24

…but most shocking of all is Bielema’s record against Power 5 Conference Schools:

13 – 29

Damn…that’s just Damn Awful!

To put into perspective just how bad Bret Bielema has been at Arkansas one must look at his conference winning percentage against all of the previous Arkansas coaches, throwing out the Idiocy of John L. Smith who also should have NEVER been hired even as an interim head coach at Arkansas by AD Jeff Long, and when you look at those numbers it is very Damn ugly indeed:

Arkansas Head Football Coaches Conference Winning % – 1950 – 2017

Bret Bielema – .294

Bobby Petrino – .531

Houston Nutt – .525

Danny Ford – .402

Joe Kines – .438

Jack Crowe – .375

Ken Hatfield – .783

Lou Holtz – .670

Frank Broyles – .714

Jack Mitchell – .472

Bowden Wyatt – .583

Otis Douglas – .222

That’s right…you have to go back to the years 1950 – 1952 and Arkansas head coach Otis Douglas to find a worse conference record than the one that Bret Bielema has put up over the past FIVE seasons at Arkansas and for those slow on the uptake that is…

11 Arkansas Head Coaches Ago

AND

65 Years Ago!

Bret Bielema just hasn’t been bad at Arkansas…he more importantly has been bad relative to Arkansas football history in the Post World War II era when .500+ football in conference and against serious opponents such as the Power 5 Conference Teams today was not only expected but was achieved by the head coaches at Arkansas which makes one wonder….

Will Arkansas AD Jeff Long let Bret Bielema destroy Arkansas Football on the sword of Jeff Long’s massive ego or will Jeff Long do something we have never heard Jeff do…

Admit he was wrong?

How exactly did Bret Bielema get his current contract which pays $4+ Million Dollars a year and includes a $15+ Million Dollar Buyout you ask?

Jeff Long gave that HUGE contract and buyout to Bret Bielema after the 2014 season when Arkansas went…wait for it…

7 – 6!

That sound you hear is us Laughing Out Loud with the everyone else with an IQ over Johnny Manziel’s jersey number at Texas A&M = 2!

With the loss to South Carolina the Razorbacks are now 2 – 3 on the season and 0 – 2 in SEC play and they have left on the schedule this…

At Alabama
Auburn
At Ole Miss
Coastal Carolina
At LSU
Mississippi State
Missouri

Any chance Arkansas wins 4 of their last 7 games to get to .500….which is Pitiful Football in our opinion at Arkansas which Bobby Petrino proved just a few years ago?

Not A Chance in Hell…in our humble opinion and if Arkansas doesn’t get to 6 wins in Bielema’s FIFTH year on the job $15M+ buyout or not Bret Bielema and Jeff Long are going to get a call sometime in late November or early December telling them they need to come to a meeting that some very busy folks will be attending and wanting to know just what the Hell is wrong with you two Damn Morons who have gutted and destroyed Arkansas Football followed by both of them being told to get the personal stuff in their offices together because their services were no longer needed at the University of Arkansas!

2. Butch Jones, Tennessee – The best news about last week for Butch Jones was that his Vols had the week off so they couldn’t lose a football game and Jones didn’t say anything stupid which is a miracle of sorts considering all the Stupid Shit that Butch Jones has said in the last few years in Knoxville!

Much like Bret Bielema…Butch Jones has a record problem at Tennessee with the Vols records over the five seasons under Jones at…

Overall: 33 – 23

SEC: 14 – 20

….and in the all-important record against Power 5 Conference Schools Jones’ record is…

18 – 23

Those are much better records than Bret Bielema which are nothing short of a Total Damn Disaster….but come now…we are talking about University of Tennessee Football here where a .500+ records in…

SEC and against Power 5 Conference Schools

….is not only expected it better Damn be achieved and thus now you know why Butch Jones is on the Hot Seat especially when you consider all the Stupid Shit Jones has said in the last few years in Knoxville!

The word on Butch Jones that a Coaches Hot Seat member is getting from his kind-of-related family members who live in East Tennessee and are UT-alums is that Butch Jones can save his job with the Vols IF….he wins ALL his remaining games save Alabama and with that in mind let’s go to what’s left on Tennessee’s schedule:

South Carolina
At Alabama
At Kentucky
Southern Miss
At Missouri
LSU
Vanderbilt

Hell….most Tennessee Football teams could easily go 6 – 1 in the 7 above remaining football games but this is the 2017 version of the Vols is NOT most Tennessee Football Teams (Hell..they QUIT against Georgia!) and we would say the chance of the Vols finishing 9 – 3 in 2017 is around the same odds that a Coaches Hot Seat member will sleep with one of Sports Illustrated swimsuit models in 2017 which has odds now set at….

ZILCHO!

Of course….we will not discount the chance that Butch Jones might have his agent Jimmy Sexton beating the bushes for another head football coaching job in college football right now and we can only imagine Sexton looking down the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings and saying something like…

“Hmmmm…I might be able to get Butch out of Tennessee and into “X” job before his ass gets fired in Knoxville!”

Maybe Jimmy…Maybe So Son!

Coach Hard against South Carolina Butch Jones….another potential employer might be watching!

3. Todd Graham, Arizona State – Arizona State had an bye in Week 6 after their loss to Stanford in Week 7 and now it’s back to football and here come the Smoking Hot Washington Huskies into Tempe to play the Sun Devils and Chris Petersen really has things rolling at UW where in the Huskies last 23 games Washington is…

21 – 2!

Damn…just when Todd Graham really needs a win to get his 2 – 3 Arizona State football team going he has to play Washington and then go to Salt Lake City in Week 7 to play Utah followed by USC in the desert!

Hell…Arizona State could be 2 – 6 in just a few weeks and Todd Graham out of a job so coach hard Todd because these next few games may be your last chance to be a head coach at a FBS school for a few years at least which is what this is really all about…it’s not about the money…it’s performing at a high enough level so that you have…

Earned the Right to be a Head Coach on the FBS level….PERIOD!

4. David Beaty, Kansas – Kansas got its ass whipped by Texas Tech on Saturday by the score of 65 – 19 and that’s becoming a common theme for the Jayhawks….

Getting Its Ass Whipped

….under head coach David Beaty who now has record at KU of…

Overall: 3 – 26

Big 12: 1 – 19

Oh…they must give thanks for Charlie Strong in Lawrence, Kansas because without that Pitiful Texas team that Charlie brought to Lawrence last year the Jayhawks would have ZERO Big 12 Conference wins under David Beaty the last THREE seasons!

Three seasons ago in 2014 Charlie Weis got fired about this time of the year and at the time when Chubby Charlie got canned by Kansas when in reality his Sorry Ass NEVER should have been hired by KU Chubby Charlie’s overall record was….

6 – 22

…and David Beaty’s overall record right now is…

3 – 26

That sound you hear is Coaches Hot Seat laughing out freaking LOUD!

Geez…what a Damn mess but the upside is that more than likely when Kansas runs David Beaty…and even KU will run David Beaty with the above records…no doubt the folks in Lawrence will make another…

Totally Damn Stupid Hire and that coach will shortly thereafter find his ass on the Hot Seat and…the Stupid Ass Wheels on the Bus Go Round and Round All the Damn Time at Kansas!

5. Barry Odom, Missouri – Missouri put a good fight against Mark Stoops Kentucky team which is an amazing bunch in so many ways in that they will play as Good or Bad as they team they are facing which says a lot about Mark Stoops inability to get his team ready and focused on gameday which will leave for another day and focus on Barry Odom who in his SECOND season as the head coach at Mizzou has now posted records of…

Overall: 5 – 12

SEC: 2 – 9

…and the 1 – 4 Tigers still have to play this season:

At Georgia
Idaho
At UConn
Florida
Tennessee
At Vanderbilt
At Arkansas

Our guess Missouri wins 2…maybe 3….of its remaining 7 games which if it’s 3 more games that would be two straight years of…

4 – 8

…records under Odom which is Bad….Oh It’s Damn Bad….and it’s up to Barry Odom to make it Good…Damn Good Son or your ass will be run…and should be run…right out of Columbia!

6. Mike Riley, Nebraska – As they say about today’s world “things change fast” and they even change fast in Nebraska because after the Nebraska loss at home to Wisconsin on Saturday we called a few of our Husker-alum friends on Sunday and to a person they all said very close to the following:

“Unless Mike Riley beats Ohio State at home next Saturday it’s over for Mike and Scott Frost will be the next head coach at Nebraska.”

If Nebraska can get current UCF head coach Scott Frost that is who we hear is now Very Damn High on several Athletic Directors lists for a new head football coach which means that Nebraska probably has the inside lane to get Frost as their next head coach if Mike Riley is fired BUT Frost may have a choice of several plum jobs in a month or so BUT there is probably not a job that fits Frost as well or where Frost can win a lot of games in the Big Ten West Division like the Nebraska job!

As for Mike Riley if Nebraska can win the rest of their games this season against…

Ohio State
At Purdue
Northwestern
At Minnesota
At Penn State
Iowa

…which is about as likely as a Coaches Hot Seat member sleeping with a Sports Illustrated swimsuit model in 2017 then Riley can coach the Huskers in 2018!

Coach em up Mike Riley…we will be pulling for your Huskers against Ohio State!

Just an opinion by Coaches Hot Seat on current UCF head Scott Frost. We have been watching and following Scott Frost since he first arrived on The Farm at Stanford in 1993 to play for Bill Walsh for two seasons before transferring to Nebraska to play for Tom Osborne for his last two years in college and right now…in our humble opinion…Frost is the best college head football coach not on the Power 5 Conference Level in America and it would be a GREAT move for Nebraska or any other Power 5 Conference school that can get him as their next head football coach.

7. Steve Addazio, Boston College – Can someone go ahead and end the misery of the Steve Addazio tenure at Boston College already and hire Chip Kelly to coach the Eagles so he can take the ACC by storm from a perch in Boston?

With the loss to Virginia Tech on Saturday Steve Addazio’s records at Boston College now stand at:

Overall: 26 – 31

ACC: 11 – 24

Please…Administration at Boston College…end this Damn Madness already because we are tired of writing about Steve Freaking Addazio and if you can get Chip Kelly at $3 Million A Year he will be worth every penny!

8. Jim Mora, UCLA – The UCLA Bruins had a bye in Week 6 and get back to it in Week 7 with a game at now red-hat Arizona which may have found themselves a quarterback against Colorado last Saturday which is No Damn Good News for Jim Mora and his Bruins who now at 3 – 2 really have to win some ballgames or the 2017 season could fall to pieces in a hurry.

Jim Mora’s records at UCLA are….So-So…

Overall: 44 – 26

Pac-12: 26 – 22

…but after a 4 – 8 record in 2016 the last thing Mora needs is another losing season in 2016 and with these games left to play…

At Arizona
Oregon
At Washington
At Utah
Arizona State
At USC
California

…the 3 – 2 Bruins are going to have a tough time finding at least 3 more wins this season if they lose to Arizona on Saturday!

9. Lincoln Riley, Oklahoma – Our biggest worry about Lincoln Riley taking over for Bob Stoops at Oklahoma was Riley turning the Sooners into…

Texas Tech Football North

….and it seems that more games that Riley has under his belt as the head coach of the Sooners the more that OU looks like the Red Raiders which the last two games has included….

An almost loss to ZERO wins Baylor

A home loss to MASSIVE underdog Iowa State

…and up next for what looks like to us the becoming Very Damn Soft Sooners is Texas in Dallas in the Red River Rivalry and it looks like to us that Texas is playing some pretty good football under Tom Herman and if the Longhorns beat the Sooners on Saturday Lincoln Riley will find his ass not only on a Scorching Hot Seat but in a sling as well!

Hell…how many more games can Very Damn Soft Oklahoma win in 2017 with these games remaining?

Texas – Dallas
At Kansas State
Texas Tech
At Oklahoma State
TCU
At Kansas
West Virginia

Hell…if OU plays like they did against Iowa State they will be LUCKY to win 3 more games which would add up to a…

7 – 5

…record and Lincoln Riley only one more Below Average season from having his ass run right out Norman, Oklahoma!

You better start coaching your Oklahoma Sooners football team Son or your head coaching career will be OVER before it really gets going and Oh Yea…the leash is Very Damn Short…and Should Be Short….for head coaches at OU that win less than 9 games a year!

10. Ed Orgeron, LSU – Luckily for Ed Orgeron and LSU they got to play on Saturday…

One of the Worst Coached Offenses in America

….in the Florida Gators offense which would be a Helluva lot better if head coach Jim McElwain and offensive coordinator Doug Nussmeier just gave the Gators offense some footballs at practice and Jim + Doug went to a local Gainesville bar!

With the win over Florida…LSU improves its record to 4 – 2 on the season with the below games still left on the schedule which we do note does not include offenses coached by Jim McElwain and Doug Nussmeier who are Totally Damn Worthless and are actually making the Florida Gators Offense WORSE every day that the two of them report to work at the University of Florida!

Auburn
At Ole Miss
At Alabama
Arkansas
At Tennessee
Texas A&M

Our guess as of October 9, 2017….LSU finishes with a record of…

7 – 5

…in 2017 and Ed Orgeron’s rear-end is still on one of the Hottest Seats in the country come late November!

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Arizona State, Arkansas, Barry Odom, Boston College, Bret Bielema, Butch Jones, David Beaty, Ed Orgeron, Florida, Jeff Long, Jim McElwain, Jim Mora, Johnny Cash, Kansas, Lincoln Riley, LSU, Mike Riley, Missouri, Nebraska, Oklahoma, Steve Addazio, Stevie Nicks, Tennessee, Todd Graham, Tom Petty, UCLA

The Crack-Ups at Tennessee and LSU and Why When Put In Command….Taking Command Is So Damn Critical – Twelve O’Clock High – 2017 Post Week 5 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

Harry October 2, 2017 0 Comments

Before we get to the Post Week 5 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings let us say a few words about just what in the Hell is going on at Tennessee and LSU which now have their head coaches in the #1 and #2 slots in the latest CHS Rankings.

Any organization, company, sports team or military unit that wants to perform at a high level more than anything needs a LEADER that the people working for their particular entity can believe in and confidently follow. For the many Coaches Hot Seat members that played on sports teams and served in the US Military the importance of having a LEADER that you believe in and confidently follow is beyond CRITICAL….it’s borderline the sports team or military unit cannot function without a STRONG LEADER and therein lies most of the problems that we have seen with college head coaches getting onto the Hot Seat and eventually fired in what is now the 11 th college football season of Coaches Hot Seat’s existence.

A great story we have told in this blog many times in the last decade-plus is about a couple of Coaches Hot Seat members stationed aboard an US Navy ship that was in late 1990 preparing to deploy to the Persian Gulf to participate in what would become Operation Desert Storm in the Spring of 1991. The Commanding Officer of the CHS members ship was a competent US Naval officer in handling a Navy ship in deployments in support of facing off against the Soviet Union in the Cold War and other deployments required of Navy ships on the East coast in the late 1980s-early 1990s. The two CHS members believed though that the Commanding Officer of their ship posed a Clear and Present Danger to the safety and security of the ship and crew, and with that in mind they went to meet with the Admiral of the Destroyer Squadron at the homeport that the ship was a member of and laid out their concerns about the CO in a clear and concise manner. The Admiral after hearing those concerns leaned back in his chair in his office and looked out through the window at the ships that were under his leadership and says to the two CHS members:

“Your CO is scheduled to rotate off the ship in several months so I am thinking we will move that up a few months and you will have a new CO who will take over in a command change ceremony after the ship gets to the Persian Gulf. Your new CO is going to be “X.”

When the two CHS members heard who the new CO was going to be “X” US Naval Officer they immediately knew that their ship would be in good hands, and more importantly that once the crew got to meet the new CO they would be confident in his ability to handle an US Navy ship in a “hot” war situation. To make a long story short the new CO took over the ship pierside in Bahrain in the Persian Gulf before the ship sailed into the northern Persian Gulf in support of Operation Desert Storm, and shortly thereafter the new CO gave a speech to the crew that was similar to the speech given by the character played by Gregory Peck in the movie Twelve O’Clock High when Peck’s character took over an American airplane squadron based in England during World War II.

Needless to say the CHS members’ ship performed very well in Operation Desert Storm and both of them fervently believe that it was the leadership of the new Commanding Officer that turned a ship and crew that was apprehensive about going into a “hot” warzone with their old CO into a well-functioning and high-performing military organization that ended up saving not only themselves from harm’s way but a Helluva lot of other people as well during their 6+ month deployment to the Persian Gulf in 1991.

Relating all of the above the situations at Tennessee and LSU right now should be obvious…but if it’s not…one should understand is that the Tennessee and LSU football programs are cracking…cracking from the inside because the players and some of the coaches do not believe in the head coaches Butch Jones and Ed Orgeron who have through their actions, behavior, and words committed many self-inflicted wounds that are destroying those two football programs….and if those two coaches do not recognize their mistakes and change course soon they will both be out of a job…and soon!

If you want to watch the entire movie Twelve O’Clock High it has been posted on YouTube.com by someone and it is below….it is one Helluva Great Movie about LEADERSHIP in a very trying and tough situation that most of all can teach people and potential leaders about when Put In Command…Take Command!

Let’s get to the 2017 Post Week 5 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings which means let’s bring out the Great Johnny Cash to show these Hot Seat Coaches what they are in the middle of…not that these Hot Seat coaches don’t already know mind you!

Thank You Johnny!

1. Butch Jones, Tennessee – If there is someone that can explain to us how a head coach at Tennessee in his 5 th year in Knoxville can let his team get its ass whipped in Neyland Stadium by the score of 41 – 0 by a coach at Georgia in this 2 nd season on the job please by all means step your ass forward and let us hear what you have to say!

The Bottom-Line is there is NO explanation for that ass whipping the Georgia Bulldogs gave to the Vols on Saturday and that goes right to the point we made above about how the Tennessee football program is now coming apart from the inside with a head coach that is cracking-up under the pressure of coaching in the SEC and no doubt Vols players are now unsure just who in the Hell is leading them and just where in the Hell he is trying to take them!

Just imagine for a moment if Tennessee had not caused that late fumble against Georgia Tech when the Yellowjackets were going in to score and put away the game….Hell….if the Vols had lost to Tech they would not be at 2 – 3 with only wins over…

Indiana State
And
UMass in a close one!

From where we sit the problems at Tennessee right now are two-fold…

A. Butch Jones hasn’t a Damn Clue what he wants to do on offense with the Vols and the Tennessee quarterbacks are a severe limiting factor for this team since it is obvious they are getting NO real coaching on how to play quarterback in the SEC…which is something that a talent like Joshua Dobbs was able to cover-up for a few years but which is now a lack of coaching at the QB position that is nothing but a Total Disaster for UT.

B. The players are starting to question the LEADERSHIP of the Vols football program meaning Butch Jones and if he really knows what the Hell he is doing and that little tirade last week in front of the media…which no doubt EVERY Tennessee player took note of…did nothing but further undermine those players doubts about Jones which in our opinion led to the lackluster..some at Coaches Hot Seat called it “lack of effort” play by the Vols against Georgia.

The reality is that you just can’t get whipped 41 – 0 on your home field by a rival like Georgia in your 5 th year on the job and that is why with these games left to play….

South Carolina
At Alabama
At Kentucky
Southern Miss
At Missouri
LSU
Vanderbilt

….anything more than losing ONE more game and Butch Jones is DONE at Tennessee…Hell he might already be done at Tennessee!

Memo to Butch Jones: Coach…if you think handling the media in Knoxville is tough Son while making $4+ million dollars a year coaching football on a college campus where your Precious Ass is very Damn safe we would invite you to join the US Military like many at Coaches Hot Seat did and make $3K a month while serving in combat zones and you would quickly find that your ass is living in a Damn Fantasyland. Either toughen your ass up Butch Jones or resign because right now you are a Damn embarrassment to not only the game of football but ALL American Men!

2. Ed Orgeron, LSU – We wrote in this blog before the season that our LSU-alum friends in the New Orleans area were getting reports from Baton Rouge that the Ed Orgeron regime at LSU was already showing some cracks with Coach O’s personality starting to change as the immensity of the pressure facing him became reality as the 2017 season approached. No doubt, our LSU-alum friends knew what the Hell they were talking about back in the Summer and now they tell us that whatever we can imagine about what is going on inside the LSU program it is much worse than our wildest dreams…make that nightmares for LSU Football fans!

We are going to leave out of this blog 95% of what our LSU-alum friends passed along to us on this Sunday, but we will say that much like at Tennessee the LSU players and some of the coaches have a SERIOUS Crisis of Confidence situation going on with the leadership of Coach O and others in the LSU Athletic Department and let’s go there for a moment.

Assume for a second that you are the Athletic Director at LSU last year and after trying to make a deal to bring Tom Herman to Baton Rouge to coach the Tigers you then turn to Ed Orgeron to coach LSU who has NEVER been a coordinator on any level of college football in his coaching career. Now…a few of us at Coaches Hot Seat first met Coach O 15+ years ago when he was working as a DL coach for Pete Carroll at USC and we love the guy….but now if the LSU Athletic Department had asked Coaches Hot Seat to come up with a list of 100 coaches to coach LSU in the aftermath of the firing of Les Miles the TRUTH is….

Ed Orgeron would not have been among the 100 coaches on that list.

OK…let’s put aside that two times LSU AD Joe Alleva basically tried to hire one coach….Jimbo Fisher in 2015 and Tom Herman in 2016…and then gave his Sorry Ass up and did the easiest thing he could do which was keep Les Miles and hire Coach O. Now let’s look at last year and you come the decision to hire Coach O who has NO offers from other schools to be a head coach or even a coordinator and you as the AD give Coach O a contract that has led to a coach who had no other decent offers to now having a…

$12 Million Dollar Buyout!

Got Joe Alleva is one of the Stupidest Damn Humans on the Earth?

Good then you have the TRUTH!

OK…let’s assume that YOU were the AD at LSU and you stupidly decided to hire Coach O what would anyone with a working brain be thinking after deciding to hire a coach that was not in demand by any other schools?

Of course YOU as someone with a working brain…THINK not the current LSU AD, LSU President or LSU Board of Trustees…you would have said something like the following to Coach O:

“We are going to hire you Coach O and pay you the market rate in the SEC Conference of $3.5 to $4 million dollars a year….BUT….we are only going to give you a $1 million dollar buyout so that if things don’t work out…and let’s be honest here they did not work out the last time you were a head coach at Ole Miss….LSU will be protected. I have a 5 year contract for you with the first year guaranteed and a $1 million dollar buyout at ANYTIME for LSU if fired and you can either take it or leave it Coach O. So what will it be?”

Of course, LSU AD Joe Alleva who is someone we would not hire to wash our cars or shovel shit in West Texas and who happens to be according to our LSU-alum friends….

One of the Most Pompous Arrogant Asses alive on the Earth

….did not do the above because Joe Alleva is simply….A Damn Moron who would be lucky to be shoveling shit in West Texas if he was not working in athletic administration and that applies to ALL these other ADs in collegiate athletics that have given fully guaranteed contracts to their head football coaches when it is the AD who has the Job and thus ALL the Power to dictate the terms of the contract for the coach which is….take it or leave it!

Getting back to the situation at LSU and Ed Orgeron…LSU is now 3 – 2 on the season with TWO wins over FBS teams in BYU and Syracuse who have a combined record in 2017 of…

3 – 7

….and the Tigers still have to play this season:

At Florida
Auburn
At Ole Miss
At Alabama
Arkansas
At Tennessee
Texas A&M

That looks like 5…maybe 6 wins…for LSU in 2017 when playing a schedule that includes only ONE team….Alabama…that has more talent than the Tigers even though a Helluva lot of people in Baton Rouge are crying like Damn babies and making excuses for what is going wrong on a “lack of talent” at LSU to which we say…

Quit crying like Damn babies and making excuses and coach your Damn team Coach O and if you can’t handle the LSU head coaching job and managing the lives and activities of 100+ Tiger players then resign before you DESTROY the LSU football program!

As for LSU AD Joe Alleva…how does this Sorry Damn Bastard and Pompous Arrogant Ass still have a job at LSU?

Oh…he’s working for people….the LSU President and LSU Board of Trustees….that are stupider than Alleva!

3. Todd Graham, Arizona State – Arizona State put up a good fight against Stanford on Saturday but another LOSS is another LOSS and Todd Graham in 6 seasons at ASU has posted records of…

Overall: 41 – 29

Pac-12: 26 – 21

….and Graham’s record against Power 5 Conference Teams in the last 6 seasons now stands at:

31 – 28

….which is AVERAGE at best and the above records are exactly why Todd Graham is on the Hot Seat and needing 8 wins or 7 wins that includes a win over Arizona at a minimum to return as the Sun Devils in 2018.

Here is what Arizona State had left to play in 2017 with a record of 2 – 3 now:

Washington
At Utah
USC
Colorado
At UCLA
At Oregon State
Arizona

If Arizona State plays the way they played against Oregon and Stanford they have a CHANCE to win 7 or 8 games in 2017…But Frankly…we would be STUNNED if Arizona State won 7+ games in 2017 and if they don’t get at least 7 wins…

The Todd Graham-Era is Over in Tempe!

4. Mark Whipple, UMass – Mark Whipple’s UMass team has put up good fights the last two weeks against Tennessee and Ohio but with another loss Whipple’s record since returning to coach the Minuteman in 2014 now stands at…

8 – 28

No…that’s not good and why Mark Whipple finds himself on the Hot Seat at 0 – 6 on the season with these games still to be played:

Georgia Southern
Appalachian State
At Mississippi State
Maine
At BYU
At FIU

That looks like TWO wins for UMass in 2017 and probably a head coaching change for the Minuteman come December and maybe the folks at UMass should think about going back to the FCS level of football where they would probably be a powerhouse FCS program!

5. Bret Bielema, Arkansas – Bret Bielema and Arkansas got their MUST WIN Game or the Freaking Universe would have ended in Arkansas with a loss against New Mexico State on Saturday and now it’s back to Big Boy Football for the 2 – 2 Hogs who have these games left on the board:

At South Carolina
At Alabama
Auburn
At Ole Miss
Coastal Carolina
At LSU
Mississippi State
Missouri

Can Arkansas even get to 6 wins in 2017 in Bielema’s FIFTH year as the head coach of the Hogs?

We don’t see it which reminds us to remind everyone of Bret Bielema’s records at Arkansas in his FIVE years at the school:

Overall: 27 – 28

SEC: 10 – 23

Oh…below is Bret Bielema’s record against Power 5 Conference Schools in the last 5 years at Arkansas:

13 – 28

Oh…by the end of 2017 Arkansas will have ALREADY paid Bret Bielema…

$20+ Million Dollars

…and if they fired him in December they would own him an additional…

$15+ Million Dollars

That’s $35 Million Dollars for a coach that has a…

13 – 28

…record against Power 5 Conference Schools and…

10 – 23

…record in SEC Conference play!

Hell…Arkansas AD Jeff Long might just be Stupider than Joe Alleva and Alleva is one of the Stupidest Damn People alive on the Earth at this moment!

6. David Beaty, Kansas – Kansas had a bye in Week 5 but head coach David Beaty’s records at Kansas now stand at…

Overall: 3 – 25

Big 12: 1 – 18

…and YES Beaty has a buyout at Kansas that is….

$3 Million Dollars

…if fired and looking at the rest of KU’s schedule do you see any more wins for the Jayhawks in 2017?

Texas Tech
At Iowa State
At TCU
Kansas State
Baylor
At Texas
Oklahoma
At Oklahoma State

Hell…if Kansas can’t beat Baylor they will not win another game in 2017 BUT everything is fine with the Kansas football program….right?

NOT!

Try 4 wins in 3 seasons…even at Kansas…is nothing short of a Total Freaking Disaster and if you don’t believe that realize that in 2.5 years at Kansas Charlie Freaking Weis won…

6 games!

7. Barry Odom, Missouri – Barry Odom and Missouri had a bye in Week 5 and the 1 – 3 Tigers with only a win over Missouri State get back at it in Week 6 playing…

At Kentucky

…and if Missouri can’t beat Kentucky we rather doubt they will win a SEC Conference Game in 2017 playing the below remaining schedule:

At Kentucky
At Georgia
Idaho
At UConn
Florida
Tennessee
At Vanderbilt
At Arkansas

Hell…can Missouri beat Idaho and UConn? OK…let’s assume Mizzou beats Idaho and UConn that will be THREE wins in 2017 that will be ONE less win than the Tigers won in 2016 in Odom’s first year on the job!

Just for the record here’s our theory on firing college head football coaches or ANYONE in ANY position in ANY line of work….

You can either do the job or you can’t and usually within 90 days or at the most 1 year we know if you can do the job or not and certainly in 2 years ANY Athletic Director would know if his head football coach can do the job or not and if it’s a NO there’s no Damn reason to waste any more time waiting on that coach to figure out how to do a job he should have known how to do on Day One!

8. Mike Riley, Nebraska – We checked in again with our Nebraska-alum friends today (Sunday) in the Great State of Nebraska and they tell us that Mike Riley still has a chance to coach the Huskers in 2018 IF he can keep things rolling and one them even offered up the following:

“I think if Riley wins all his remaining games except one which would mean a 9 – 3 record he will be the head coach at Nebraska next season…Heck…he might even be able to squeak by with an 8 – 4 record and keep his job if none of the losses are blowouts. Nothing wrong with giving Mike Riley one more season if he wins 8 games with no embarrassing losses because that gives Scott Frost another year to hone his craft down in Orlando.”

OK…let’s see what Nebraska has left on their schedule now at 3 – 2 on the season:

Wisconsin
Ohio State
At Purdue
Northwestern
At Minnesota
At Penn State
Iowa

Can the Huskers go 5 – 2 the rest of way in 2017?

Not likely in our opinion but therein lies the Opportunity To Go Do Something Coach Riley and Great Luck To You Coach!

9. Jim Mora, UCLA – Clearly Jim Mora got a lot of effort from the Bruins in the Rose Bowl on Saturday night in beating Colorado which is an OK but certainly not Very Good or Great Buffs team and now the 3 – 2 Bruins need to keep things rolling with these games still to be played:

At Arizona
Oregon
At Washington
At Utah
Arizona State
At USC
California

Damn….that looks like a record of….

5 – 7
OR
6 – 6
OR
7 – 5

…in Jim Mora’s 6 th year at UCLA which isn’t anything much at all….even at UCLA!

10. Steve Addazio, Boston College – Steve Addazio and his BC team beat Central Michigan on Saturday to raise their record in 2017 to…

2 – 3

…and Addazio’s records at BC to…

Overall: 26 – 30

ACC: 11 – 23

…which is Beyond A Joke even at Boston College and the Eagles still have to play in 2017 games against…

Virginia Tech
At Louisville
At Virginia
Florida State
NC State
UConn
At Syracuse

Got 3, 4 or at the most 5 wins or Boston College in 2017 which is Steve Addazio’s FIFTH year the school?

Beyond A Joke BC!

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Arizona State, Arkansas, Barry Odom, Boston College, Bret Bielema, Butch Jones, Charlie Weis, David Beaty, Ed Orgeron, FCS, Jeff Long, Jim Mora, Joe Alleva, Kansas, LSU, Mark Whipple, Mike Riley, Missouri, Nebraska, Steve Addazio, Tennessee, Todd Graham, UCLA, UMass

2017 Post Week 4 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – The Stanford QB Situation…Let K. J. Costello Be K. J. Costello and Don’t Turn Him Into A Clone! – Who Doesn’t Love the Great Johnny Cash?

Harry September 26, 2017 0 Comments

Before we get to the Post Week 4 Coaches Hot Seat Ranking Analysis we first must throw out a few comments about the UCLA – Stanford game on Saturday night.

In our opinion if Stanford starting QB Keller Chryst does not get injured against UCLA on Saturday the Cardinal loses to a very Damn average Bruins team with Chryst being replaced by 3 rd string QB K. J. Costello who up to this point has not had enough reps in Stanford practices to have been turned into a Clone by the Cloner Stanford Football Coaches and now we are worried as Hell that the Cloners will turn their full attention to Costello in practice and turn Costello’s rear-end to a Clone as well! The reality is that two great Stanford QBs Andrew Luck and Kevin Hogan did in achieving great success did what K. J. Costello did so well against UCLA which was make plays moving around on the field and not standing like a stick-man in the backfield like Chryst tends to do, and if David Shaw and the Stanford coaches turn Costello into a stick-man then the Cardinal will have a Helluva time even winning 6 games in 2017 so let’s sure the Hell hope they don’t turn Costello into a…

Clone Stick-man

….because Stanford now at 2 – 2 on the season still has a tough schedule to navigate against:

Arizona State
At Utah
Oregon
At Oregon State
At Washington State
Washington
California
Notre Dame

Memo to David Shaw and Mike Bloomgren: Let E. J. Costello be E. J. Costello and stop the Damn Cloner Bullshit at the QB position Boys!

Week 4 was a good week for several head coaches on the Hot Seat but there were several coaches that put themselves into positions where they have very little margin for error in the rest of the 2017 season and with that mind let’s bring out the Great Johnny Cash to send a message to these Hot Seat coaches!

Thank You Johnny Cash!

2017 Post Week 4 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

1. Bret Bielema, Arkansas – It’s been a long time ago but a couple of Coaches Hot Seat members seem to remember a comment made by Bill Walsh when someone said that a…

“That coach has had bad luck because he is losing a lot of close games”

…to which Coach responded to by saying….

“Why in the Hell is that coach and team playing so many close games?”

The main problem with Bret Bielema at Arkansas is that in his 5 th year the school we don’t have a Damn clue what the Hogs offense is trying to do and the Hogs defense has changed so many times the past 5 seasons that it’s no surprise the players don’t play at any kind of consistent level especially at a level that a defense needs to play to compete and win in the SEC.

To give everyone some kind of perspective at how much Bret Bielema is underperforming at Arkansas look at former Hogs head coach Houston Nutt’s record at the school taking over an equal or worse disaster from Danny Ford (8 – 14 in his last two seasons at UA) than what Bielema inherited from Petrino/Smith:

Houston Nutt – 1998 – 2002

Overall: 39 – 23 (.629)

SEC: 22 – 18 (.550)

Bret Bielema – 2013 – 2017

Overall: 26 – 28 (.481)

SEC: 10 – 23 (.303)

If Bret Bielema and Arkansas won the remaining 9 games on their 2017 schedule to finish at 10 – 2 Bielema would still not even be at the level Houston Nutt posted after 5 seasons at the school and that should tell you all you need to know about how underachieving Bielema has been at Arkansas and with these games left to be played is there anyone that thinks the Hogs are winning out?

New Mexico State
At South Carolina
At Alabama
Auburn
At Ole Miss
Coastal Carolina
At LSU
Mississippi State
Missouri

Our guess based on the way that Arkansas has played under Bret Bielema over the past 54 games the Hogs win….

4 maybe 5 more games

….which at best would give Arkansas a 6 – 6 record in Bielema’s 5 th season in Fayetteville and luckily for Bret he is at a place that…

Celebrates and Pays A Helluva Lot of Money for Average or Worse!

2. David Beaty, Kansas – David Beaty is in his 3 rd season as the head coach at Kansas and after the loss to West Virginia at home on Saturday he has posted records of….

Overall: 3 – 25

SEC: 1 – 18

…and if that is acceptable to the folks in the Great State of Kansas then…

Bless Their Hearts!

Kansas has games left to be played against…

Texas Tech
At Iowa State
At TCU
Kansas State
Baylor
At Texas
Oklahoma
At Oklahoma State

….and if the Jayhawks win another game in 2017 we will be SHOCKED not that we would be SHOCKED that the folks at Kansas will continue to…

Celebrate Way Damn Below Average

…because after all we are talking about the…

University of Kansas

…which is where…

Average or Worse Meets the Great American Plains!

3. Mark Whipple, UMass – Mark Whipple and UMass played a solid game against a barely Damn awake Tennessee team in Knoxville on Saturday but another loss is another loss and in the last four seasons being back at the school Whipple has posted a record of…

8 – 33

….and the Minutemen still have to play this season these games:

Ohio
At USF
Georgia Southern
Appalachian State
At Mississippi State
Maine
At BYU
At FIU

UMass, even if they play like they did against the Vols, maybe have 1 or 2 wins on the board at the end of the season and if that is acceptable to the folks at UMass then why should we be mad at those folks for accepting…

Very Damn and even Below Average?

3. Barry Odom, Missouri – Right now former Mizzou football player and grad Barry Odom is trending as the head coach at Mizzou into very dangerous territory with what looks like to us a football team coming apart at the seams at the exact moment with 16 games under Odom’s belt when the Tigers should be showing signs that Odom’s influence is starting to improve a team that went…

5 – 7

…in Gary Pinkel’s last year at the school in 2015.

Consider the below NCAA rankings among 129 teams for a moment when you also consider that Barry Odom was the defensive coordinator at Missouri and Memphis before taking over the head coaching job at Mizzou:

Total Defense: 107

Rushing Defense: 101

Scoring Defense: 122

Oh…Mizzou is averaging giving up….

40 points per game!

Hmmm…what exactly is going on at Mizzou right now is a Helluva question that we cannot answer since we don’t know any folks really close to the program but from the outside looking in watching the Tigers it’s our opinion…

Barry Odom is not getting anywhere near 100% from his players

…and maybe Odom realizes that and that is why he had that meltdown after getting his team’s ass whipped by Auburn on Saturday and if you are getting less than 100% effort from your players and still have to play the below games you are in a Helluva bad spot!

At Kentucky
At Georgia
Idaho
At UConn
Florida
Tennessee
At Vanderbilt
At Arkansas

What…Mizzou will win probably 3 games in Barry Odom’s second year at the school?

Not good…no make that a…Total Damn Disaster for Mizzou Football!

5. Jim Mora, UCLA – Several of us at Coaches Hot Seat got to see Jim Mora’s UCLA Bruins up close the other night at the Stanford game and in our opinion it’s pretty easy to see why the Bruins are….

8 – 13

…in their last 21 games under Mora and that is because in our humble opinion…

UCLA is a poorly coached football team that is getting about 60% out of the talent on its roster

Why is that exactly?

We haven’t a Damn clue but from watching the UCLA sideline in the Stanford game we got a whiff of….

“Whatever the Hell happens it doesn’t really matter!”

….and now at 2 – 2 on the season which includes a win over Texas A&M in a game that the Bruins had no business winning UCLA still has left to play:

Colorado
At Arizona
Oregon
At Washington
At Utah
Arizona State
At USC
California

Our opinion…if UCLA plays like it did against Stanford in their remaining 8 games they will be Damn Lucky to win 4 games in 2017!

6. Butch Jones, Tennessee – We are not quite sure what is going on at Tennessee because watching the UMass – Vols game it looked like the Tennessee players were playing hard against a severely overmatched UMass team which makes us wonder if we have reached the point where Butch Jones coaching is actually taking away from the Vols chance of success instead of adding to it and that goes right to the heart of successful coaching because EVERY coach should add to his players ability to win not taking away from it and the rest of 2017 will show if our opinion is right or not with these games still left on the board for the 3 – 1 Vols:

Georgia
South Carolina
At Alabama
At Kentucky
Southern Miss
At Missouri
LSU
Vanderbilt

Tennessee has plenty of talent to win 9 or 10 games in 2017 with FIVE remaining games at home and road games at Kentucky and at Missouri where the Vols will have a major advantage in talent but how many games will Tennessee win in 2017?

Our guess if they continue to play the way they have so far in 2017:

7 wins

If Tennessee only wins 7 games in 2017 the Vols will be looking for a new head football coach come December.

7. Kevin Sumlin, Texas A&M – With Kevin Sumlin needing 10+ wins in 2017 to return to coach the Aggies in 2018 he can only wish that he and his coaching staff didn’t totally mismanage the second half of the UCLA games because the Aggies would now be at…

4 – 0

…instead of 3 – 1 but with 3 wins on the board Sumlin still has a chance to get to 10 wins IF the Aggies win 7 of their last 8 games against:

South Carolina
Alabama
At Florida
Mississippi State
Auburn
New Mexico
At Ole Miss
At LSU

Good Luck with that Kevin Sumlin!

8. Todd Graham, Arizona State – Maybe Todd Graham has figured out with an Arizona State defense that cannot stop ANYONE that the only way the Aztecs are going to win ANY football games is to score a Helluva lot of points and that is what ASU did against Oregon on Saturday scoring…

37 points

…and if Todd Graham is going to save his job he should tell his coaching staff our goal for each game left on the 2017 schedule is to score…

40+ points in EVERY game

…and with Graham needing 7 or 8 wins at least to return to coach the Aztecs in 2018 Arizona State has a chance to move to 3 – 2 with a win over Stanford on Saturday IF they can score 40+ points on The Farm!

How many of the below remaining games can Arizona State reasonably win?

At Stanford
Washington
At Utah
USC
Colorado
At UCLA
At Oregon State
Arizona

If they score 40+ points in all of the above games they can win 5+ games but if they score 30 or less points in each game….maybe 2 or 3 games…so there you go Todd Graham!

9. Mike Riley, Nebraska – The word from our good and long-time Nebraska-alum friends in Omaha is that anything less than 10+ wins by Mike Riley in 2017 and the Huskers will be looking for a new head football coach in a couple of months and we have been told that potential coaches for Nebraska are already being vetted because the folks at the University of Nebraska know if they do have to make a coaching change this year they…

MUST find the right coach

…because another mediocre to bad hire which can be argued the Huskers have done every time save Frank Solich in the post-Tom Osborne years is what makes next hire at Nebraska so Damn critical!

Now at 2 – 2 on the season with these games left to be played for Mike Riley and Nebraska let’s see if the Huskers can get to 10 wins in 2017:

At Illinois
Wisconsin
Ohio State
At Purdue
Northwestern
At Minnesota
At Penn State
Iowa

We don’t see the Huskers winning out and you know what the Hell that means!

10. Steve Addazio, Boston College – After the loss to Clemson on Saturday the win/loss numbers in Steve Addazio’s FIVE seasons at Boston College aren’t pretty…

Overall: 25 – 30

ACC: 10 – 23

….and one would think that anything less than 6 wins in 2017 and the Addazio-era will mercifully be brought to an end at BC.

Can Boston College win 5 of their last 8 games in 2017 with the below games remaining?

Central Michigan
Virginia Tech
At Louisville
At Virginia
Florida State
NC State
UConn
At Syracuse

Not a Chance in Hell or Boston!

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Arizona State, Arkansas, Barry Odom, Boston College, Bret Bielema, Butch Jones, Coaches Hot Seat, Coaches Hot Seat Rankings, David Beaty, David Shaw, Jim Mora, Kansas, Kevin Sumlin, Mark Whipple, Mike Riley, Missouri, Nebraska, Stanford, Steve Addazio, Tennessee, Texas A&M, Todd Graham, UCLA, UMass

Post Week 2 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – CFB Season Just “Feels Good” Like Glen Campbell’s Gentle On My Mind – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash! – Yes…Still Millions Of Racists In America and It Seems….Some Communists in Kansas!

Harry September 11, 2017 0 Comments

Well that has been one Helluva two weeks to start the college football season for us here at Coaches Hot Seat…what about for you folks?

At least in our households there is nothing that can get the attention of everyone from the kids to the adults…including our wives…like the game of football and it’s fascinating to see the anticipation for the football season and the games unfold each week and year. Only the Olympic Games from our younger days in the 1970s through 2000 or so created as much excitement as the game of football in our lives and Good, Bad or Indifferent it’s great to have football back which when you get down to it just “Feels Good” like Glen Campbell singing Gentle On My Mind:

Thank You Glen Campbell and now let’s bring out the Late Great Johnny Cash to send a message to the Coaches on the Hot Seat!

Thank You Mr. Cash!

Post Week 2 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

1. Todd Graham, Arizona State – We are not sure how many games that Todd Graham needs to win in 2017 to return as the head coach of the Sun Devils next season but Arizona State President Michael Crow in a story in the Arizona Republic earlier this year made it clear he was raised by Real Americans in making the below comments on the importance of ASU football winning on a regular basis:

“”Losing records over more than one year in any sport are unacceptable,” Crow said. “You have to look at what the reasons are and the dynamics, but (football) coach (Todd) Graham completely understands that his very successful start at ASU has got to be realized again.”

Graham’s teams were 28-12 from 2012-14 and 11-14 since (39-26 overall). He is going into his sixth season with five new assistant coaches including both coordinators and four years left on his contract after not receiving a one-year extension as he had in the past.

“We’ve got tremendous athletes, new coordinators, new thoughtful additions to the coaching staff,” Crow said. “Coach Graham is completely energized. I don’t think it’s possible for him to be un-energized. We’re exciting about bringing all of that together. We think we’ve got a great culture that’s been evolving. We’re excited about this season, but losing seasons at our level of performance expectation are unacceptable.” “

Yep…that’s about as Damn Clear as an university president can get when it comes to what he or she expects out of their football program and Bravo for President Crow in being upfront and having high expectations because having high expectations for oneself and the company or institution you work for is not only what made America GREAT it’s what has defined the American Republic from the start!

Getting back to Todd Graham the worst thing that could have happened to Todd Graham was for him to lose any of his three non-conference games against New Mexico State, San Diego State and Texas Tech, but on Saturday night ASU lost to a very good San Diego State team and now has to play Texas Tech in Lubbock in what is seriously a MUST WIN Game for Todd Graham and his Sun Devils with NINE Pac-12 Conference games still on the slate and a tough slate it is after Tech:

Oregon
At Stanford
Washington
At Utah
USC
Colorado
At UCLA
At Oregon State
Arizona

Damn! Let’s assume for a moment that Todd Graham could get away with 7 wins and thus return for the 2018 season as the head coach at Arizona State…if ASU falls to 1 – 2 after a loss to Texas Tech where in the Hell are 6 more wins out of the remaining 9 games on the Arizona State schedule?

Yep….Todd Graham better Damn get his team straightened out before they get to Lubbock and they better Damn score 45 points if they want to be the Red Raiders on Saturday!

2. Brian Kelly, Notre Dame – There are lots of folks in the media talking about how many games Notre Dame has lost in the last year by “less than one score” and we have some news for the folks who we like to call the…

“Cry Me A River of Tears Non-Fighting Irish Enablers”

….in the last 16 games under Brian Kelly Notre Dame’s record is…

5 – 11

The funny thing is that the folks from Georgia actually think they went to South Bend and actually accomplished something when in FACT they only did what James Franklin said beating Pitt felt like to the Nittany Lions…

“Like beating Akron!”

Yep fans of Georgia Football…your asses just beat Akron wearing gold helmets and you are one of the….

11 teams

…that have beaten Notre Dame in their last 16 games so don’t act like you have done anything big boys because you haven’t!

As for the future of Brian Kelly who proved once again in the post-Georgia game press conference that he is a…

Pompous Arrogant Ass that believes he invented the Sun, the Stars and all that we peons see in the sky

…in our opinion we have it on good authority that if Kelly wins less than 9 games in 2017 his ass is DONE in South Bend!

Here’s what Notre Dame has left on their schedule now at 1 – 1 on the year and look for 8 more wins for the Irish in 2017 with us:

At Boston College
At Michigan State
Miami (Ohio)
At North Carolina
USC
NC State
Wake Forest
At Miami
Navy
At Stanford

Well…Notre Dame has more talent than every team remaining on their schedule save the USC Trojans so how many games might Brian Kelly and the Irish win out of the 10 remaining?

Our guess….Notre Dame will be lucky to win 7 games in 2017 and that means one of the highest profile jobs in FBS football will open up in late November – early December and one’s gotta think that if the Irish job does open up that the first call will be to Bob Stoops to see if he’s interested in getting back into coaching and if Bob isn’t interested then we know who the second call will be to but we don’t want to throw that coach’s name out there since he might have a shot at getting his team into the College Football Playoff this year and he doesn’t need the Damn headache of a mention with the Notre Dame job!

3. Kevin Sumlin, Texas A&M – A few of us were watching a tape of the Nicholls – Texas A&M game on Sunday night and the Aggies….don’t look like that great of a football team and in our opinion don’t look like they are all that interested in playing football in our opinion…but then it was Nicholls the Aggies were playing and this week A&M gets La. Lafayette or Louisiana as they like to be called now, and if the Aggies play like they did against Nichols against Louisiana their asses will get beat and that should get someone’s attention in College Station one would think!

As for the racist letter that Kevin Sumlin received this past week that his wife posted on Twitter we have no problem with people speaking out against racism when they experience it or identifying racists directly when they come into contact with them. The Lily-White Boys at Coaches Hot Seat raised in the 1970s-80s were primarily raised in California by parents that would not tolerate racism or bigotry or any kind and would even jump down your ass if you didn’t respect older people and say “Yes Sir and Yes Ma’am” when interacting with them and our Fathers…Oh Damn…we were raised in a time in America when Fathers…no doubt like Kevin Sumlin’s father…who would use the belt on our asses if we did something bad enough that called for the belt and no doubt if we used the belt on our kids today like out Dads did they would haul our asses away to the jail!

One thing in particular that a few of our Fathers instilled in us was that we should not let someone make a racist statement and get away with it if we were in a place where it was appropriate to do or say something about it, and on more than one occasion we have been in situations where other white folks have said something racist that we have responded to in a verbal way that in a few situations escalated to a physical altercation, but then that is what our Fathers would have expected of us. The most surprising thing about the racist letter sent to Kevin Sumlin’s house is that anyone is surprised that there are Millions of Racists in America that hold racist views of people that don’t look or act or talk or generally aren’t exactly like them and for those that were surprised we have a Newsflash for you….

There are Millions of Racists in America!

The Great Bobby Bowden has a terrific quote on about treating people that are harsh to you “with kindness” because it really kills them when you do that, but a few years ago a couple of us were with our wives at a party near the Pebble Beach Golf Resort on the Monterey Peninsula which was all white folks and some guy says something very racist about black people that we will not repeat in this blog post and the two of us can remember well our wives looking at each other who were no doubt thinking that they were about to leave this party which is exactly what happened but not before the two of us hauled the guy that made the racist comment out on the patio and throttled his ass which our wives weren’t thrilled with but made us feel good! The thing is when you play sports and you serve in the US Military you are forced to work, live, eat, and play with people from all kinds of backgrounds, colors, creeds, religions, philosophies on life, etc., and you cannot be around people that are different than you and but come away with a Helluva lot different view of life than people that have spent their entire lives in one town, around one type of people, and living one kind of life and it’s too bad that all Americans can’t play sports and serve in the military because it would do a Helluva lot of good for our country….in our humble opinion.

Getting back to Kevin Sumlin the word on the street in Texas is that anything less than 10 wins in 2017 and Sumlin will be out of a job come late November and now at 1 – 1 on the season here is what the Aggies have left to play:

Louisiana
Arkansas (Dallas)
South Carolina
Alabama
At Florida
Mississippi State
Auburn
New Mexico
At Ole Miss
At LSU

In our opinion A&M has more talent than every team remaining on its schedule except for Alabama and LSU and the Aggies have roughly equal talent to Florida and Auburn so assume the Aggies lose to Alabama at home and to LSU in Baton Rouge that is only 9 wins and we don’t think 9 wins in 2017 is going to get it done for Sumlin unless maybe that 9th win was over LSU in Baton Rouge to end the season….now that might get Sumlin one more year to prove he can turn the Aggies into a serious contender for the SEC Conference Title which in our opinion the Aggies should be in the middle of…

Every Damn Year!

For those that don’t know it the Main Reason Kevin Sumlin is on the Hot Seat are the below two records:

SEC: 21 – 19

Against FBS Teams: 26 – 22

At Texas A&M that’s just flat-out…Not Good Enough!

4. Mark Whipple, UMass – Mark Whipple and UMass lost to Old Dominion at home on Saturday to drop the Minutemen’s record to 0 – 3 in 2017 and Whipple’s record in the last four years at UMass now stands at:

8 – 21

Damn…that’s not a good thing Martha Stewart who lives up UMass way might say!

Can UMass win a game in 2017?

At Temple
At Tennessee
Ohio
At USF
Georgia Southern
Appalachian State
At Mississippi State
Maine
At BYU

Maybe the Minutemen can beat a struggling Georgia Southern team and maybe they can beat the Maine Black Bears….Maybe!

5. Lance Leipold, Buffalo – With Buffalo’s loss to Army on Saturday in a close game by the score of 21 – 17 Lance Leipold’s records at Buffalo now stand at:

Overall: 7 – 19

MAC: 4 – 12

Those are “Firing Numbers” is what a certain member at Coaches Hot Seat would say in this spot and he would be right!

Up next for Buffalo is a MUST WIN game against Colgate and then they host FAU on September 23 in a game that if Leipold and the Bulls win will launch Lane Kiffin’s ass back onto the Hot Seat and Oh that will be fun to be roasting Lane Kiffin’s ass again here at Coaches Hot Seat so….

Memo to Lance Leipold: Beat Colgate and FAU Son!

6. Chris Ash, Rutgers – After the Total Debacle of a loss to Eastern Michigan on Saturday Rutgers head coach Chris Ash is now facing the MUST WIN Game of all-time on Saturday in a home game against FCS Morgan State and in our opinion if Ash can’t win this game his ass should be fired right after the game and told to turn in the keys to his courtesy car because….

You are done Son!

OK…let’s assume Rutgers beats Morgan State to improve to 1 – 2 on the season which is only right since a loss in this spot and….Ash is done…what does Rutgers have left after the Morgan State game?

At Nebraska – Loss
Ohio State – Loss
At Illinois – Who knows
Purdue – Loss
At Michigan – Loss
Maryland – Loss
At Penn State – Loss
At Indiana – Loss
Michigan State – Who knows

OK….Rutgers COULD win 3 games in 2017 if everything goes right and every fan of Rutgers football that just read that line put his or her head down and said…

“The Hell with the whole Damn thing!”

7. Bret Bielema, Arkansas – Last week in the Must Win Game blog post we said that Bret Bielema’s record against FBS schools was 14 – 25 in 5 seasons at Arkansas when in fact his record against FBS schools is now after the TCU game…

20 – 27

…and his record against Power 5 Conference schools now stands at….

14 – 26

OK…Bret Bielema is making…

$4.4 Million Dollars A Year

…and he has already been paid by Arkansas…

$16+ Million Dollars

…and here’s the kicker if Bret Bielema is fired anytime between now and December 31, 2017 his buyout is….

$15.4 Million Dollars

…which Doc Harper over at the Arkansas Fight website points out is the second biggest potential buyout number in college football history only behind Charlie Weis at Notre Dame who was given a contract that only a…

Total Damn Moron that knows NOTHING about Football

….would have given to Weis so what does this massive…

$15.4 Million Dollars

…buyout say about Arkansas AD Jeff Long who has given a contact north of….

$30 Million Dollars

….to a coach who has a record in SEC Conference play of…

10 – 22

….against FBS teams of…

20 – 27

…and against Power 5 schools of…

14 – 26

That would make Jeff Long a Damn Moron of a very High Order just behind the Damn Morons at Notre Dame that signed Charlie Weis to a long-term deal when no one at Coaches Hot Seat would have EVER hired Charlie Weis to wash our cars forget about being our head football coach!

Last week we said that Texas A&M fans should be proud of Being Average because Kevin Sumlin had posted records of…

SEC: .525

Against FBS Teams: .542

…so guess what Bret Bielema’s records are….

SEC: .313

Against FBS Teams: .426

Forget Being Average fans of Arkansas Football…Be Very Damn Proud…you are…

Way Damn Below Average Folks!

Oh…now at 1 – 1 on the season here is what Arkansas has left after looking like Crapola against TCU which if the Horned Frogs hadn’t made a bunch of stupid mistakes could have beaten the Razorbacks by 30+ instead of 21!

Texas A&M
New Mexico State
At South Carolina
At Alabama
Auburn
At Ole Miss
Coastal Carolina
At LSU
Mississippi State
Missouri

Arkansas has plenty of talent to win at least 8 games in 2017 but how many games will the Razorbacks win….our guess….

…and would a 6 – 6 record keep Bret Bielema employed for another season at Arkansas?

Consider this for a moment….

When Houston Nutt was fired at Arkansas in 2007 his records coaching the Razorbacks in 10 seasons were…

Overall: 75 – 48

SEC: 42 – 38

…and Bret Bielema’s records now stand at…

Overall: 26 – 27

SEC: 10 – 22

You do the Damn math Arkansas fans and please if you can come up with a legitimate reason why Bret Bielema has a $15.4 million dollar buyout please let us know because we cannot think of one Damn reason he has such a contract at Arkansas….not counting of course that Jeff Long is a…

Damn Moron

…which is actually the only Damn thing that makes any Damn sense!

We have some news for Jeff Long…if Arkansas loses to Texas A&M on Saturday in Dallas….your ass may just get fired before your ass gets back to Fayetteville Son!

8. Rich Rodriguez, Arizona – There just is no Damn good excuse for Arizona losing to Houston at home in Tucson in Rich Rodriguez’s 6 th season coaching the Wildcats and now in Arizona’s last 20 games Rodriguez’s football team has posted a record of…

6 – 14

….and RichRod’s records at Arizona now stand at:

Overall: 37 – 30

Pac-12: 18 – 26

At Arizona Rich Rodriguez or any other head football coach can get away with winning 7-plus games a year and going to a bowl game each season BUT he cannot get away with posting losing records, and another losing record in 2017, in our humble opinion, RichRod will be fired at season’s end and now at 1 – 1 here is what the Wildcats have left….

At UTEP
Utah
At Colorado
UCLA
At Cal
Washington State
At USC
Oregon State
At Oregon
At Arizona State

We see no reason at all that Rich Rodriguez should not be able to lead Arizona to at least 6 wins in 2017 which would mean winning 5 of the remaining 10 games which is a small hurdle to get across in our opinion when you are in your 6 th season on the job and more than likely 6 wins is all RichRod needs to be back in 2018.

9. Scottie Montgomery, East Carolina – A Fundamental Rule of Firing and Hiring is that if you going to Fire someone make Damn sure you have or will Hire someone better than the person you Fired and in our opinion when Ruffin McNeil was fired after 6 seasons as the head coach at East Carolina posting records of…

Overall: 42 – 34

Conference: 30 – 18

…which was a very dubious move by the ECU AD in our opinion it just made no Damn sense that East Carolina hired Scottie Montgomery in his place who in 2 seasons has posted records of…

Overall: 3 – 11

Conference: 1 – 7

East Carolina is now 0 – 2 on the season after losses to James Madison and West Virginia and still has to play games against…

Virginia Tech
South Florida
Temple
At UCF
BYU
At Houston
At UConn
Tulane
Cincinnati
At Memphis

Will East Carolina win a game in 2017?

ECU will maybe win 1….Possibly 2 games in 2017 and if East Carolina only wins 2 games in 2017 then we fully expect that Scottie Montgomery will be held to the same standard as Ruffin McNeil and will be fired in late November….unless of course Montgomery is being held to a lower standard of some kind by the folks at ECU!

10. David Beaty, Kansas – We here at Coaches Hot Seat couldn’t help but laugh when we saw this news story earlier this year about Kansas head coach David Beaty…

David Beaty firmly on cold seat as head coach at Kansas, Benton Smith, Lawrence Journal-World

Cold Seat? What the Hell is that?

Of course the above article is based up Dennis Dodd’s Hot Seat Ratings and maybe Dennis who doesn’t live to far from KU also embraces…

Socialism + Communism

…because if David Beaty’s job is safe at Kansas with records in 3 years on the job of…

Overall: 3 – 23

Big 12: 1 – 17

….then we have to wonder where exactly the folks at the University of Kansas were raised because…

It could NOT have been in America NOR by Real Americans!

You see…if you are raised in America by Real Americans you don’t accept Losing and you expect Excellence but then the same Damn Moron AD at Kansas that hired David Beaty hired Charlie Weis so then we are not so much dealing with…

Non-Real Americans

…at Kansas as just….

Total Damn Morons!

Now at 1 – 1 on the season after a win over SE Missouri State and a loss to Central Michigan at home here is what Kansas has left in 2017:

At Ohio
West Virginia
Texas Tech
At Iowa State
At TCU
Kansas State
Baylor
At Texas
Oklahoma
At Oklahoma State

Got 1 and Freaking 11 Cold Seat David Beaty?

Well….Kansas might beat able to beat Baylor which has a team that looks like it has flat-out quit on Matt Rhule already so maybe you can get to 2 – 10 Cold Seat Beaty and if you get to 2 – 10 no doubt the followers of…

Lenin, Stalin and Marx

…in Lawrenceville, Kansas will be proud and might even given you another contract extension!

Oh to be working for Dumb and Stupid Communists….

What else could an American ask for…it’s like Lifetime Employment even if you are Sorry As Hell at your job! Lenin and Staling would be so proud of the University of Kansas!

Uncategorized

AD, Arizona, Arizona State, Arkansas, Bret Bielema, Brian Kelly, Buffalo, Chris Ash, Coaches Hot Seat, David Beaty, East Carolina, Jeff Long, Kansas, Kevin Sumlin, Lance Leipold, Mark Whipple, Notre Dame, Rich Rodriguez, Ruffin McNeil, Rutgers, Scottie Montgomery, Texas A&M, Todd Graham, UMass

10 CFB Head Coaches Facing MUST WIN Games in Week 2 – 10 Coaches + Teams That Need To Take It To The Limit! – Thank You Randy!

Harry September 7, 2017 0 Comments

It’s early in the college football season being only Week 2 but there are 10 CFB Head Coaches facing MUST WIN Games and with that in mind we ask the Eagles and Randy Meisner to motivate these Coaches + Teams To Take It To the Limit to get a win in these games. Bring It Randy Meisner!

Thank You Randy!

Brian Kelly, Notre Dame vs. Georgia – In Brian Kelly’s last 15 games as the head coach at Notre Dame he has posted a record of….

5 – 10

….and after an opening with win over Temple the very last Damn thing Brian Kelly needs is a 2 nd year coach in Kirby Smart to bring a Georgia team into South Bend and beat the Irish. Looking at the rest of Notre Dame’s schedule after the Dawgs we only see one maybe “Sure Win” in Miami (OH) at home September 30, and with Kelly needing 10+ wins to be back as the head coach of the Irish in 2018 a loss to Georgia in this spot would nothing short of a Complete Freaking Disaster!

No…the Irish faithful will not be happy if Georgia beats Notre Dame on Saturday!

Bret Bielema, Arkansas vs. TCU – Bret Bielema’s overall coaching win/loss numbers at Arkansas are shocking enough at…

Overall: 26 – 26

SEC: 10 – 22

…but consider the following number for Bielema in his 5 years at Arkansas….his win/loss record against FBS teams:

14 – 25

Damn! Bret Bielema who is making around $4.5 million dollars a year and if fired at the end of this season has a buyout in the $10M+ range has a record against FBS teams of…Yes….look at that number again Razorback fans even if you don’t want to….

14 – 25

….which is a winning percentage of…

.359

Double Damn!

Do you think this Saturday’s game against TCU is big for Bret Bielema with 8 SEC Conference games still left on the 2017 schedule?

You better Damn believe it is because if Bielema loses this game at home to TCU there will be no funny story that can be told to explain a record against FBS teams of….

14 – 26 = .350

….which as one can clearly see is only…

14 wins in Bielema’s first 40 games against FBS teams!

Hell, the first person you picked randomly out of the Fayetteville White Pages could have posted the Pitiful Record of coaching the Razorbacks to 14 wins against the first 40 FBS teams Arkansas played!

Rich Rodriguez, Arizona vs. Houston – Some amazing numbers that we never thought we would see associated with Rich Rodriguez is that over the past 3 seasons at Arizona counting the first game of 2017 Rodriguez has posted a record of…

11 – 15

….overall in his last 26 games and a record of…

4 – 14

…in Pac-12 play over the past two seasons and before conference play gets going in 2017 Arizona better Damn beat Houston at home on Saturday night or this could be a mighty long season indeed with 10 games left and none of them a walk in the park kind of game:

At UTEP
Utah
At Colorado
UCLA
At Cal
Washington State
At USC
Oregon State
At Oregon
At Arizona State

Expectations are never real high for Arizona Football so even 6 wins would probably keep RichRod in Arizona for another season, but less than 6 wins which would be two straight losing seasons and a Wildcat program headed in Totally the wrong Damn direction and Rich Rodriguez may find himself doing television work for the 2018 college football season back at CBS Sports in New York!

Yep…you better Damn beat Houston on Saturday night Rich!

Barry Odom, Missouri vs. South Carolina – Even with a 4 – 8 record overall and 2 – 6 record in SEC Conference play Barry Odom did a decent job coaching Missouri in his first season as a head coach in 2016, but in Year 2 the expectations are moved up a bit and we are expecting the Tigers to win at least 6 games and if Odom hopes to get his ass off the Hot Seat and beating South Carolina at home on Saturday is a MUST WIN if Mizzou is to get 6 wins with the below remaining games to be played after the Gamecocks:

Purdue
Auburn
At Kentucky
At Georgia
Idaho
At UConn
Florida
Tennessee
At Vanderbilt
At Arkansas

Nope….we see no way in Hell that Missouri gets to 6 wins in 2017 without beating South Carolina on Saturday so that equals MUST WIN Game for you Barry Odom!

Tony Sanchez, UNLV vs. Idaho – After the opening game debacle loss to Howard when we didn’t even know Howard had a football team it is CRITICAL that Tony Sanchez get the shipped righted at UNLV and quickly and find a way to beat Idaho on the road which will not be an easy game to win in a very tough place to play against a fast-improving Vandals football team under head coach Paul Petrino. Tony Sanchez’s win/loss record in his 3 rd year at UNLV now stands at…

7 – 18

….and a loss to Idaho with Ohio State on deck and the MWC slate of conference games in the hole would be a very bad look indeed…very Damn bad Tony!

Jim Mora, UCLA vs. Hawaii – Jim Mora avoided what could have been a Total Meltdown of the UCLA football program in Week 1 courtesy of Kevin Sumlin and the Texas A&M coaching staff which gave away a sure-fire win to the Bruins and may have saved UCLA’s season because if the Bruins don’t beat A&M the whole Damn thing may have fell apart in Westwood which saw UCLA come into the first game of the 2017 season with a record of….

5 – 11

….in their last 16 games and with that in mind that makes this week’s Hawaii game a MUST WIN because a loss in this spot with a trip to play Memphis in Memphis on deck and then Stanford on The Farm next we are talking about what could be the end of the 2017 campaign before things really get going for the Bruins.

UCLA has two to three times as much talent as Hawaii and there really would be no good excuse for the Bruins to lose to the Warriors at the Rose Bowl and if that doesn’t equal MUST WIN Game then nothing does!

Tom Herman, Texas vs. San Jose State – The Tom Herman era at Texas tries for new start in Week 2 after the Total Disaster loss to Maryland at home in Week 1 that saw a Texas team play a football game that looked like they were hardly coached at all and this Week 2 game is against San Jose State which also has a first year head coach so this is not a game that the Longhorns can possibly lose….right? Hell…who the Hell knows!

No way Texas loses to San Jose State in Austin….BUT if Texas did lose this game then Tom Herman’s ass would be hotter than a Texas Summer day deep in the month of August!

Don’t lose this game to San Jose State Tom Herman…because if you do you will be the laughingstock of the American sports world after the Texas Athletic Department has been telling anyone that would listen for the last 8 months that you are the Second Coming of Darrell Royal and Mack Brown all rolled into one! No…don’t lose this game Son!

David Beaty, Kansas vs. Central Michigan – David Beaty is now in his 3 rd season coaching the Kansas Jayhawks football team and if Beaty is actually coaching-up KU worth a Damn there is not a chance in Hell that his football team loses to a Central Michigan team at home in Lawrence on Saturday, and we are very interested to see how this game plays out and finishes up because there are a lot of folks claiming on the plains of Kansas that the Jayhawks are improving under Beaty…well if they are then KU should easily beat at MAC team at home….right? Damn Right!

Oh…Kansas plays another MAC team in Week 3 in a game at Ohio so if Kansas can’t beat Central Michigan at home there is not a chance in Hell that KU beats Ohio on the road and if KU can’t beat Ohio on the road there is not a chance in Hell they win a Big 12 Conference game in 2017 and we all know where this is going because if KU doesn’t win a Big 12 Conference game in 2017 David Beaty and a few other folks are going to get their asses run out of Lawrence, Kansas come December!

Mark Dantonio, Michigan State vs. Western Michigan – Things for Mark Dantonio and Michigan State have been going straight downhill since Spartans QB Connor Cook through an interception just before the half of the 2015 CFB Playoff Semi-Final Game against Alabama when Michigan State was trailing Bama by a score of only 10 – 0 and driving for a TD that could have made the score 10 – 7 at half and since that incredibly foolish interception by Cook the Spartans have posted a record of….

4 – 10

….and Mark Dantonio is one loss at home to Western Michigan at home to finding his ass squarely on the Hot Seat with Notre Dame at home on deck and the entire 2017 Big Ten schedule still to be played.

Check-Out Michigan State’s remaining schedule after playing Western Michigan on Saturday:

Notre Dame
Iowa
At Michigan
At Minnesota
Indiana
At Northwestern
Penn State
At Ohio State
Maryland
At Rutgers

Geez….Yep…Western Michigan is a MUST WIN Game if Michigan State is interested in getting to at least 6 wins in 2017 and a loss in this spot could see the Spartans spiral down again like they did last season which from that Connor Cook interception against Alabama forward would be one of the fastest falls of a major program in college football history!

Come on Coach Dantonio!

Mark Whipple, UMass vs. Old Dominion – If UMass can play Hawaii tough at home in Week Zero we see no reason at all that UMass can’t beat Old Dominion at home in Week 2 and this is MUST WIN Game for head coach Mark Whipple and UMass with road games at Temple and Tennessee in Weeks 3 and 4!

Uncategorized

Arizona, Arkansas, Barry Odom, Bret Bielema, Brian Kelly, David Beaty, Georgia, Jim Mora, Kansas, Kirby Smart, Mark Dantonio, Mark Whipple, Michigan State, Missouri, Notre Dame, Rich Rodriguez, Texas, Tom Herman, Tony Sanchez, UCLA, UMass, UNLV

The 11th College Football Season of Coaches Hot Seat Kicks-Off! – 2017 Post Week One Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – Give These Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

Harry September 5, 2017 0 Comments

Coaches Hot Seat was first dreamed up in October 2006 as a way to help force out then Stanford head football coach Walt Harris among a group of close friends who were having drinks at the Balboa Café in the Marina District of San Francisco, and here we are in September 2017 with Coaches Hot Seat now entering its 11 th college football season…a second decade now begins…with that same group of close friends tossing out their opinions from the peanut gallery about the relative status of college football head coaches job status vis-à-vis the warmth of their asses!

Coaches Hot Seat has been great fun from the start and has grown from a few close friends to over 170 members of Coaches Hot Seat now that mainly are members it seems to attend the annual Coaches Hot Seat Summer Clambake at Lake Tahoe each August where we have one Helluva great time talking football and the upcoming college football season and CHS members also help to shape the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings each week.

With that in mind let’s get to the business at hand which is the….

2017 Post Week One Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

…which means let’s bring out the Great Johnny Cash to give the coaches on the Hot Seat a wake-up call!

Thank You Mr. Cash and away we go on the 11 th season of Coaches Hot Seat

1. Kevin Sumlin, Texas A&M – If you thought watching the Total Meltdown of Kevin Sumlin and the Texas A&M coaching staff in the Rose Bowl on Sunday night was nothing short of a Total Disaster then watching a replay of the game only makes things worse because one could take a look at each play and see mistake….after mistake….after mistake…after mistake by Sumlin and the Aggies Coaches that flat-out….

Robbed the A&M players of what should have been a win over UCLA!

It’s easy to look at the second-half of the A&M – UCLA game and point to many Beyond Stupid mistakes made by Kevin Sumlin and the A&M coaching staff, but the Idiocy actually began in the first quarter with the Aggies up 7 – 3 and the Bruins fumbling the ball and an A&M player returning it to the 3 yard line which was followed by A&M OC Noel Mazzone calling the following plays:

Fade to Left-Side of the End Zone
Fade to Right-Side of the End Zone
2 Yard Run to 1 Yard Line

Followed by a field goal putting the Aggies up 10 – 3 over UCLA.

Why didn’t Aggies OC Noel Mazzone just run the Damn ball right down the Bruins throat from the 3 yard line you ask when A&M was gashing the Bruins for over 7 yards a carry in the game?

Damn Good Question but this is just the beginning of the Damn Idiocy that was capped off in the second-half by what we hear at Coaches Hot Seat believe to be…

A Series of the Stupidest Coaching Decisions in the History of College Football in America

…which at Texas A&M dates back to 1894!

By now everyone that follows college football closely must know that Texas A&M went up by the score of….

Aggies – 44
Bruins – 10

…after a field goal with 4:08 left in the 3 rd quarter of the game. At this point there should have been NO CHANCE IN HELL of UCLA winning this football game unless Kevin Sumlin and the A&M coaches committed a series of blunders that would make the Stupidest Human Beings on the Earth look like Mensa members and guess what….that is exactly what happened!

Following the Aggies field goal to pt them up 44 – 10 over UCLA the Bruins then scored in 2 minutes to make the score 44 – 17 with 2:06 left in the 3 rd Quarter and this is what Kevin Sumlin and his offensive coaches did the rest of the game leading to one of the great meltdowns in college football history:

Aggies Remaining Offensive Plays in the Game after up 44 – 17:

1. Run for no gain
2. Run for 6 yards
3. Incomplete Pass
4. Punt

UCLA Touchdown and score is A&M 44 – UCLA 24

5. Run for 1 yard
6. Incomplete Pas
7. Run for 14 yards
8. Run for 3 yards
9. Run for 8 yards
10. Complete Pass
11. Sack loss of 10 yards
12. Run for 1 yard
13. Punt

UCLA Touchdown and score is A&M 44 – UCLA 31

14. Pass Complete
15. Run for 6 yards
16. Incomplete Pass
17. Run for 12 yards
18. Run for 7 yards
19. Run for loss 1 yard

With ball on 16 yard line and a made field goal making the score 47 – 31 or a two TD and two 2-point conversion game Aggies OC Noel Mazzone calls a pass play and….

20. Sack for loss of 9 yards

…which leads to a 43 yard field goal miss by the Aggies kicker instead of what should have been at most a 32 yard field goal if not shorter if Noel Mazzone had just RUN THE DAMN BALL on third down!

UCLA Touchdown and score is A&M 44 – UCLA 38

21. Run for 2 yards
22. Incomplete Pass
23. Sack for loss of 5 yards
24. Punt

UCLA Touchdown and score is A&M 44 – UCLA 45

The four plays in the last A&M series when the Aggies failed to get a first down are not that important because it was desperation time, but look the other plays above and see the Total Damn Idiocy especially when one realizes that at halftime A&M was averaging over….

6 Yards-Plus Per Run

….and in the second-half when the Aggies could have Stuff the Ball down the Bruins throats with their run game they not only called way Damn too many pass plays they also at the most critical time of the game when a made field goal would have at worst gotten the Aggies into overtime against UCLA a pass play was called with a true freshman QB on the field who not surprisingly took a big loss on a sack which led to a critical missed field goal and in our opinion….

This was level of Stupid Coaching that has not been seen in FBS Football since Charlie Weis was the head coach at Notre Dame!

In our opinion here at Coaches Hot Seat Kevin Sumlin did nothing less than GUT his own players by allowing his coaches to make one Stupid Damn Decision after another and for that he should have already been fired and the Aggies could have hired ANY high school coach on ANY level from ANYWHERE in the State of Texas and be the Aggies players would be getting better coaching today!

Let’s look at Kevin Sumlin’s records in six seasons at Texas A&M:

Overall: 44 – 22

SEC: 21 – 19

Against FBS Teams: 26 – 22

Against Group of 6 Teams: 12 – 0

Against FCS Teams: 6 – 0

Yep…take away the 18 Cupcakes that Keivn Sumlin has played and beat at A&M and we are talking about winning percentages of…

SEC: .525

Against FBS Teams: .542

…and for the above Very Average Records Kevin Sumlin has already been paid north of….

$25 Million Dollars

….and Texas A&M still owes Sumlin over $11 Million Dollars if they fired him today!

$35+ Million Dollars for a .542 record against FBS teams and .525 record in SEC play?

What kind of Damn Idiots are running Texas A&M University exactly?

Let’s not forget something else in this spot….

Last November at Kyle Field in College Station A&M led Ole Miss by 15 points entering the 4 th quarter before losing 29 – 28 and more to the point in Texas A&M last SIX games against FBS teams Kevin Sumlin’s record is…

0 – 6!

That’s right…Texas A&M has not beaten an FBS team since last October 8 when the Aggies beat Tennessee in double-overtime in College Station!

Luckily for Kevin Sumlin he is working at place….

Texas A&M University

…that embraces and celebrates AVERAGE and thus he can get away with winning percentages like…

.542 and .525

….and A&M has Nicholls and La. Lafayette to play at home in their next two games before playing Arkansas in Dallas on September 23 but then from Arkansas on it’s….

Arkansas (Dallas)
South Carolina
Alabama
At Florida
Mississippi State
Auburn
New Mexico
At Ole Miss
At LSU

…which to us looks like 7 or 8 wins for the Aggies in 2017 and based upon what the folks running Texas A&M have been willing to accept in the past maybe they will continue to accept…

Average

…now tied to the Complete Damn Stupidity of the UCLA game and the beat in College Station will go on for another year!

Be Proud Aggies…YOU are Average As Hell!

2. Todd Graham, Arizona State – In the last two seasons at Arizona State Todd Graham has posted combined records of…

Overall: 11 – 14

Pac-12: 6 – 12

….and it seems clear from the noise coming out of Tempe that it’s going to probably take 8 wins plus in 2017 for Graham to be coaching the Sun Devils in 2018 and it wasn’t exactly a rousing start to this season in beating a very weak New Mexico State team 37 – 31, and if ASU plays like that the rest of the year there’s not a chance in Hell that Graham will be the head coach come December. Now at 1 – 0 on the year here is what ASU has left to play:

San Diego State
At Texas Tech
Oregon
At Stanford
Washington
At Utah
USC
Colorado
At UCLA
At Oregon State
Arizona

Can Todd Graham find 7 wins+ out of the Sun Devils remaining 11 games?

We don’t see it which means a very good job in Arizona State could be opening up come late November.

3. Tony Sanchez, UNLV – The first time that anyone at Coaches Hot Seat ran into Tony Sanchez he was the head football coach at California High School in San Ramon, California which is in the East Bay of San Francisco and where Tony coached for five years before taking over and having a very successful run at Bishop Gorman High School in Las Vegas which led to him getting the UNLV job in 2015 which has led to the following records at UNLV after the disastrous opening season loss to the Howard University football team on Saturday night:

Overall: 7 – 18

MWC: 5 – 11

Those are not so great records for Tony Sanchez and the Rebels have left play this season….

At Idaho
At Ohio State
San Jose State
San Diego State
At Air Force
Utah State
At Fresno State
Hawaii
BYU
At New Mexico
At Nevada

…and it’s just a guess on our part with a new AD at UNLV on the job in Desiree Reed-Francois on the job who came over from Virginia Tech Sanchez is going to need 6-plus wins in 2017 to be the head coach of the Rebels in 2018, and if Sanchez can find 6 wins out of the above 11 remaining games he should return as the head coach at UNLV and get an extension on his contract as well!

4. Mark Whipple, UMass – Since returning to coach at UMass in 2014 after an earlier stint coaching the Minutemen on the FCS level between 1998 – 2003 Mark Whipple has posted a record of…

Overall: 8 – 30

…over the last four seasons and an 0 – 2 start to 2017 with losses to Hawaii and Coastal Carolina doesn’t exactly give us confidence that Whipple will be the head coach at UMass when Santa shows up in late December!

What’s left for UMass this season:

Old Dominion – Loss
At Temple – Loss
At Tennessee – Loss
Ohio – Loss
At USF – Loss
Georgia Southern – Maybe Win
Appalachian State – Loss
At Mississippi State – Loss
Maine – Maybe Win
At BYU – Loss

That’s a 2 – 10 record at best in our minds for UMass in 2017 and more than likely a new head football coach for the Minutemen in 2018….in our humble opinion.

5. Lance Leipold, Buffalo – Buffalo looked decent against Minnesota in the opening game of the season BUT in his third year on the job coaching the Bulls head coach Lance Leipold now has records of…

Overall: 7 – 18

MAC: 4 – 12

….on the board and we rather doubt that Leipold will be able to survive another losing season….but then this is Buffalo we are talking about and maybe Leipold can survive another sub .500 record and return to coach the Bulls again in 2018 which would be fine with us here at Coaches Hot Seat since we don’t have a dog in this fight or in any fight for that matter when it comes to Buffalo!

6. Tom Herman, Texas – Earlier this year a couple of Coaches Hot Seat members were down in Austin for business plus fishing with our Texas-alum buddies and over a BBQ dinner we asked how the Tom Herman-era was going and one of those UT-alums said….

“You mean the Cult of Tom Herman?”

Coaches Hot Seat: “The Cult of Tom Herman? What the Hell does that mean?”

UT Alum: “It means that everything within the Texas Athletic Department is set-up to promote Tom Herman in the public instead of the Texas Football Team.”

Coaches Hot Seat: “That’s a change from the past?”

UT Alum: “You kidding? Mack Brown and Charlie Strong put the focus on the players….Tom Herman seems interested in only one thing…Tom Herman’s Precious Ass!”

Coaches Hot Seat: “Now that’s Damn interesting.”

UT Alum: “It is and there’s no explaining it even in Texas which is full of people with big egos….but I cannot recall running into or seeing anyone operate with a bigger ego than Tom Herman who seems to believe he invented the Sun, the Moon, and the Stars!”

Coaches Hot Seat: “It will be interesting to see how that will play out during the season.”

UT Alum: “Well right now with everything focused on kissing Tom Herman’s ass I fully expect Texas to lose the opening game to Maryland!”

Memo to Tom Herman: Get Over Yourself Son or your head coaching tenure at Texas or anywhere else will be over before it really gets going. Oh…welcome to the Hot Seat Son!

Texas has PLENTY OF TALENT to win 8 games in 2017 with the below schedule remaining….

San Jose State
At USC
At Iowa State
Kansas State
Oklahoma
Oklahoma State
At Baylor
At TCU
Kansas
At West Virginia
Texas Tech

…and if Tom Herman expects to get his ass off the Hot Seat he better Damn win 8 games-plus this season!

7. Brian Kelly, Notre Dame – Brian Kelly and the Irish got a nice win over a decent Temple team in Week 1 and now the 2017 season actually begins with a pretty good and very talented Georgia team coming to South Bend on Saturday evening. There’s a very good reason why Brian Kelly is on the Hot Seat and that is Kelly’s record over the past 5 seasons since Alabama BLASTED the Irish in the 2012-13 BCS National Title Game and that record is…

32 – 20 .615

…while averaging 7.75 wins per season and ANYTHING below 9 wins a season as head coach of Notre Dame your ass is AVERAGE and will place your ass on the…Yep…you got it…

Hot Seat!

We asked around with a few of our Notre Dame alum friends in the last few weeks how many wins that Brian Kelly needs to return to coach the Irish in 2018 and the consensus is…

10 wins-plus

….and we don’t think there is ANY chance of all of Notre Dame winning 10 games if the Irish lose to Georgia so Coach Hard Brian Kelly against the Dawgs!

8. Chris Ash, Rutgers – Chris Ash’s Rutgers team played better against Washington they than the team played in almost any game in 2016 and now Ash will need to keep the improvement going in a HUGE and MUST WIN GAMES against Eastern Michigan at home on Saturday and then Morgan State on September 16 which would send the Scarlet Knights to Nebraska with a 2 – 1 record which would at least give Ash’s team some momentum and maybe his ass off the Hot Seat…or maybe not!

9. Jim Mora, UCLA – We are not quite sure why the Hell the UCLA Bruins didn’t show up ready to play against Texas A&M on Sunday at the Rose Bowl but a Total Collapse by the Aggies plus a Bruins team that wouldn’t quit saved Mora from having the Hottest Seat in the America after Week 1 of the season and at least Jim Mora has that going for him!

Now at 1 – 0 on the season UCLA has left to play in 2017….

Hawaii
At Memphis
At Stanford
Colorado
At Arizona
Oregon
At Washington
At Utah
Arizona State
At USC
California

Damn…that’s a tough schedule and with Jim Mora needing at least 6 wins in 2017 to keep his job even with a MASSIVE buyout if fired it’s not going to be easy for UCLA to get to 6 wins unless they win their next 2 games to start at 3 – 0 before they head to The Farm to play Stanford on September 23.

10. Bret Bielema, Arkansas – In 5 seasons at Arkansas Bret Bielema has the following records on the board…

Overall: 26 – 26

SEC: 10 – 22

…and that is what we would call Below Average for ANY Head Football Coach at Arkansas and we would recommend to both Bret Bielema and Arkansas AD Jeff Long that Bielema win at least 6 games in 2017 or both of them might find themselves out of a job come December which is why the next two games…

TCU
Texas A&M (Dallas)

…are MUST WIN GAMES before playing Cupcake New Mexico State on September 30 and then heading into the rest of the SEC schedule with a game at South Carolina.

If Arkansas does lose to TCU and Texas A&M to be at 2 – 2 at the end of September it’s not going to be easy to find 4 more wins among these last 8 games….

At South Carolina
At Alabama
Auburn
At Ole Miss
Coastal Carolina
At LSU
Mississippi State
Missouri

….with 6 wins total needed if Bielema wants to be employed in the State of Arkansas after December 2017!

Uncategorized

Arizona State, Arkansas, Austin, Big 12, Big Ten, Bret Bielema, Brian Kelly, Buffalo, Chris Ash, Coaches Hot Seat, Coaches Hot Seat Rankings, Jim Mora, Kevin Sumlin, Lance Leipold, MAC, Mark Whipple, MWC, Notre Dame, Pac-12, Rutgers, SEC, South Bend, Texas, Texas A&M, Todd Graham, Tom Herman, Tony Sanchez, UCLA, UMass, UNLV

#6 Hot Seat Head Coach – Paul Haynes, Kent State AND #7 Hot Seat Head Coach – Bret Bielema, Arkansas – The Voodoo Hex and “Because the boy likes to eat, can tell a joke and has a great looking wife!”

Harry April 5, 2017 0 Comments

#6 Hot Seat Head Coach – Paul Haynes, Kent State

Considering that Paul Haynes took over the Kent State football team in the 2013 season that in the year before in 2012 had posted a record of 11 – 3 it’s hard for us to understand how Haynes is still the head coach at KSU considering his records…

Overall: 12 – 35

MAC: 8 – 23

….in FOUR years on the job but then as one of our old bosses used to tell us…

“The world needs average folks boys because not everyone can be great!”

Let’s check out Paul Haynes yearly records at Kent State:

2013: 4 – 8
2014: 2 – 9
2015: 3 – 9
2016: 3 – 9

OK….can someone explain to us how Paul Haynes is still the head football coach at Kent State?

We have heard more sound in the middle of Death Valley on a cloudless night that what we just heard in folks answering the above question!

Let’s take a look at Kent State’s 2017 football schedule:

At Clemson
Howard
At Marshall
At Louisville
Buffalo
At Northern Illinois
Miami (Ohio)
At Ohio
Bowling Green
At Western Michigan
Central Michigan
At Akron

Geez…that’s a pretty tough schedule and if we had to guess the Golden Flashes will probably end up with records come December of….

Overall: 3 – 9

MAC: 2 – 6

With a record of 3 – 9 in Paul Hayne’s FIFTH season on the job at Kent State cost him his job?

3- 9 sure the Hell hasn’t so far!

#7 Hot Seat Head Coach – Bret Bielema, Arkansas

A good Arkansas-alum friend of ours who lives in Ft. Smith, Arkansas and was with his wife in San Francisco recently on a business trip told us at dinner one night the following about Arkansas head coach Bret Bielema:

“Whatever the Hell voodoo hex that Bielema has over Arkansas fans is something I would love to bottle and sell to football coaches everywhere, because there’s no explanation for someone having a 10 – 22 record in SEC play in four seasons on the job having his ass kissed pretty much around the clock by Hog fans!”

Let’s take a look at Bret Bielema’s records at Arkansas with FOUR years on the books:

Overall: 25 – 26

SEC: 10 – 22

Woooooo Pig that’s BAD but then when have some kind of voodoo hex going for you just might be able to have TEN conference wins on the books after FOUR years on the job, but now let’s look at the FOUR most successful Arkansas coaches’ conference records in the post Frank Broyles era to compare to Bielema and those four coaches would be:

Lou Holtz (Southwest Conference): 37 – 18 – 1 (.670)

Ken Hatfield (Southwest Conference): 36 – 10 (.783)

Houston Nutt (SEC Conference): 42 – 38 (.525)

Bobby Petrino (SEC Conference): 17 – 15 (.531)

AND

Bret Bielema (SEC Conference): 10 – 22 (.313)

What the Hell?

Besides talking to our good buddy from Ft. Smith, Arkansas who is pissed as Hell that Below Average As Hell is now acceptable to fans of Arkansas football…

“Because the boy likes to eat, can tell a joke and has a great looking wife!”

….we have reached out to some other folks we have known over the years in the Great State of Arkansas including one who knew Bill Clinton really well when Brother Bill was Governor of Arkansas (Oh, this guy has some great stories about Brother Bill that we wish we could put in this blog!), and when we asked him about the current state of Arkansas football and Bret Bielema his response was:

Long Silence….A Loud Sigh……and then….

“Hell…I don’t know but I do know this….my Son who went to Arkansas was over at my place for dinner couple of weeks back with his wife and kids and he told me he had heard someone say that Bielema’s record against SEC West teams was 7 – 17, and I decided to look it up myself and Damn isn’t Bielema’s record against SEC West teams is 7 – 17! That’s not good boys…that’s just no Damn good at all!”

Yep…Bret Bielema’s record against SEC West teams is 7 – 17 in FOUR years on the job and below are his records against those SEC West teams:

Alabama: 0 – 4
Auburn: 1 – 3
LSU: 2 – 2
Mississippi: 3 – 1
Mississippi State: 1 – 3
Texas A&M: 0 – 4

As many people in the South often say when they see their educational systems ranked towards the bottom nationally…

“Thank God For Mississippi!”

….and in this case Bret Bielema can “Thank God For Mississippi” because without those three wins over the Rebels his SEC record at Arkansas would move from…

Devastatingly Bad to Biblically Bad!

So the real question here is how long can Arkansas Football be Below Average As Hell under Bret Bielema who we remind everyone is making $4 Million Dollars Plus a year to win football games for the Razorbacks?

Consider this little factoid which is another example about how…

Athletic Directors are the easiest Damn folks in America to roll

…if fired before 2018 Bret Bielema’s buyout of his Arkansas contract is…

$15.4 Million Dollars!

There might be ONE…maybe TWO Morons in America that would give a contract like that to a coach that was not a sitting Athletic Director and no doubt Bret Bielema’s agent is right now having a good laugh at the contract he got from Arkansas AD Jeff Long for Bielema which in our opinion is borderline a criminal act against Arkansas football fans which pay ALL the bills in Fayetteville!

Let’s go to the Arkansas 2017 schedule to see where this situation at Arkansas may be when December rolls around:

Florida A&M
TCU
Bye Week
Texas A&M – Dallas
New Mexico State
At South Carolina
At Alabama
Auburn
At Ole Miss
Coastal Carolina
At LSU
Mississippi State
Missouri

The above schedule has TWO cupcakes in Florida A&M and New Mexico State and TWO pretty tough games against TCU and Coastal Carolina (which is no joke team moving up from FCS) out-of-conference so if we had to guess right now Bret Bielema and Arkansas will finish with the below records in 2017:

Overall: 6 – 6

SEC: 3 – 5

Could Bret Bielema survive putting up the above records in his FIFTH season on the job at Arkansas considering he would have a buyout north of $15 Million Dollars if fired?

Not a chance in Hell nor would Arkansas AD Jeff Long with both of them being run out of Fayetteville on a rail by the middle of December!

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Arkansas, Bobby Petrino, Bret Bielema, Frank Broyles, Houston Nutt, Ken Hatfield, Kent State, Lou Holtz, MAC, Paul Haynes, SEC

Post Week 3 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 1 – 10 Hot Seat Coaches – These Head Coaches Don’t Like To See the Man in Black but Give ‘em Hell anyway Johnny Cash!

Harry September 21, 2015 0 Comments

Amazingly Week 3 of the college football season is already in the books and the HEAT is being turned-up on college head coaches who have stumbled out of the gate or in some cases NEVER got out of the gate and with that REALITY let’s get to the…

Post Week 3 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 1 – 10 Hot Seat Coaches

These head coaches don’t like to see the Man in Black but Give ‘em Hell anyway Johnny Cash!

1. Paul Rhoads, Iowa State – With the Iowa State loss to Toledo on Saturday considering this stat for a second….

In Paul Rhoads last 30 games at Iowa State he has posted a record of:

7 – 23

In Paul Rhoads last 25 Big 12 games at Iowa State he has posted a record of:

4 – 21

Yep, that will land your ass on the No. 1 Hot Seat in the land and after a 1 – 2 start to the 2015 season the Cyclones get a week off before playing Kansas at home on October 3.

Iowa State can beat this Kansas team in the wake of the Complete Freaking Disaster left by that Dumbass Charlie Weis…right?

We sure the Hell hope so but how will Iowa State fare in its other 8 Big 12 conference games after they beat Kansas on October 3?

Hell if we know, but it looks like barring a Miracle in Corn Country Iowa State will be looking for a new head football coach come December!

2. Doug Martin, New Mexico State – Doug Martin is in his third season at New Mexico State and with the Aggies overtime loss to UTEP on Saturday Martin has posted a record in three seasons at NMSU of….

4 – 23

Enough said on Doug Martin’s Hot Seat situation at New Mexico State!

3. Darrell Hazell, Purdue – We here at Coaches Hot Seat fully expected Darrell Hazell’s Boilermakers to beat Virginia Tech at home on Saturday but instead the Hokies delivered a 51 – 24 beatdown of Purdue and now the 2015 season could turn into a Complete Freaking Disaster for Hazell with a very good Bowling Green team coming to town this coming Saturday.

A loss to Bowling Green and Purdue will start the season at…

1 – 3

…with 8 Big Ten games left to be played starting with a game at Michigan State on October 3 and for the life of us we believe if you can’t beat Virginia Tech or Bowling Green how in the Hell will Purdue win another game this season!

Oh, Darrell Hazell’s win/loss records in his third season at Purdue:

Overall: 5 – 22

Big Ten: 1 – 15

That’s BAD with a capital B!

4. Mike London, Virginia – After a few tense moments Mike London’s Virginia football team got its first win of the season over William & Mary on Saturday and now it’s back to Big Boy football in Week 4 with a game on Friday night against Boise State.

Now in his SIXTH season at Virginia Mike London has win/loss records on the board of…

Overall: 24 – 40

ACC: 11 – 29

…with ONE winning season out of FIVE and if UVA is going to post a winning season in 2015 we would recommend that they beat Boise State on Friday night!

By comparison the Virginia head coach that Mike London replaced and who was run out of Charlottesville on a rail…

Al Groh

…coached at UVA for NINE seasons posting FIVE winning seasons.

Yep…that reality will land your ass on the Hot Seat 100% of the time!

5. Bret Bielema, Arkansas – A few years ago a handful of Coaches Hot Seat members were having dinner with one of their college physics professors and one asked the professor about the following Albert Einstein quote:

CHS Member: “John…what did Einstein mean when he said…

“Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.”

College Physics Professor: “Ahhh…Albert…a very smart one he was. There is a scientific answer to what Einstein meant when he said, “Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one,” but remembering you boys’ grades in my class I will give you the layman’s answer!

Loud laughter at the table!

College Physics Professor: “What Einstein meant was that reality is nothing more and nothing less than how each of our brains perceives the world and the perceived reality for one person is often very different than the reality for almost everyone else on the Earth and thus one reality is very hard to define. In the end reality is just the perception created by the neurons firing off in each of our brains which human beings will naturally try to order towards their own individual particular world view.”

CHS Member: “So what you are saying is that reality…meaning a one reality for everyone no more exists than the Man on the Moon and that reality is different for each person based upon how their individual brain perceives the world?”

College Physics Professor: “Precisely, but then human beings because of their highly evolved brains look at the world around them and naturally want to order it, to organize it, to classify it, to put people and ideas into certain boxes, because that is what homo sapiens were forced to do over millions of years of evolution to survive and then thrive and with that you now not only understand what Einstein was saying but you can also grasp why perception plays such a huge role in daily human life. In the end we are what we perceive of the world, of other people, and of ourselves.”

Getting back to the Complete Freaking Disaster that is Bret Bielema’s REALITY right now after the Razorbacks loss to Texas Tech on Saturday the PERCEPTION at the end of the 2014 season was that Arkansas made some HUGE strides….but did they in FACT?

Let’s go Joe Friday and get to the FACTS on the State of Arkansas Football…Past…Present…and Future:

After a loss to Georgia on October 18, 2014 the Arkansas record stood at…

3 – 4

….and then the Razorbacks under Bret Bielema finished the season by doing this:

Beating UAB = No Big Whoop!

Losing to Mississippi State = Not Surprising

Beating a Collapsing LSU Team = No Big Whoop!

Beating a Demoralized Ole Miss Team =No Big Whoop!

Losing to Missouri = Not Surprising

Beating a Mediocre Texas Team in Bowl Game = No Big Whoop!

So the so-called BIG ending to the Razorbacks 2014 was in REALITY…

No Big Whoop!

…but the PERCEPTION was that Bret Bielema had “turned things around” at Arkansas when in REALITY nothing could be farther from the truth!

Let’s move ahead to the 2015 season for Arkansas which has started this way following an off-season of Bret Bielema and Arkansas AD Jeff Long telling anyone that would listen that Bielema was the second-coming of Paul “Bear” Bryant and that Ohio State was actually playing in something akin to the MAC instead of the Big Ten….in our opinion of course….

Beat UTEP = No Big Whoop!

Lost to Toledo = Hmmmm….Surprising….but NOT REALLY!

Lost to Texas Tech = Hmmmm…Even More Surprising…but NOT REALLY!

Oh, Bret Bielema’s record since supposedly things “turned around” at Arkansas after the loss to Georgia last season:

5 – 4

So the PERCEPTION until Toledo whipped Arkansas was that the Razorbacks were….BACK.…but the REALITY which is just now sinking into the heads of Arkansas fans who are thinking the Pig Farmer from Iowa might have pulled a fast one on them in the last year is that…

Arkansas is 1 – 2 and they play Texas A&M on Saturday in Dallas and the Aggies are….

6 Point Favorites!

Guess what?

If Arkansas loses to Texas A&M on Saturday with games at Tennessee and at Alabama on deck the REALITY is the Razorbacks could be sitting at…

1 – 5

….when Auburn comes to Fayetteville on October 24 in what could be the….

Ultimate Hot Seat vs. Hot Seat Coaching Match-Up with the Losing Coach being run out of town on the back of a hog!

Here’s the REALITY for Bret Bielema based upon the building PERCEPTION in Arkansas which we confirmed by talking to an Arkansas-alum friend of ours in Ft. Smith, Arkansas who could buy-and-sell everyone in the Fayetteville – Bentonville area except for the Walton clan and that REALITY is…

“If this season implodes both Bielema and AD Jeff Long might find themselves lucky to shoveling shit in West Texas as you boys like to say from time to time!”

Yep…that is the REALITY NOW in Arkansas folks!

On another note per our agreement with Texas Tech head coach Kliff Kingsbury since the Red Raiders beat the Razorbacks we will no longer be calling Coach Kingsbury….

“_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _”

Nice win there in Fayetteville Kliff!

6. Willie Taggart, South Florida – With the South Florida loss to Maryland on Saturday the Bulls dropped to…

1 – 2

…on the season and things don’t get any easier for Willie Taggart and his football team with this upcoming schedule:

Memphis
Syracuse
At UConn
SMU
At Navy
At East Carolina
Temple
Cincinnati
At UCF

Memo to Willie Taggart: IF your South Florida team plays the rest of the season the way it has played its first three games in 2015…

You might not win another game until you play hapless UCF on November 26 and Hell Furman beat UCF so go ahead and put that win over the Black Knights on the board!

Get off your ass Willie Taggart! Signed: Coaches Hot Seat

7. Gus Malzahn, Auburn – At the tail-end of the 2014 college football season we ran into an “old and former defensive coordinator in the SEC” at a restaurant in Atlanta and he said to us when the Auburn football program came up:

“The Gus Malzahn experiment in major college football is about to come to an end because what he and other coaches like Chip Kelly have been doing just cannot work unless they have an elite quarterback and neither Malzahn nor Kelly have that right now nor more than likely will they have that next season.”

We talked about the above statement for a few hours in the lobby of an Atlanta hotel and came to agreement on the idea that Malzahn and Kelly’s offenses depended on an elite quarterback who could make instant decisions on the fly but Auburn had Jeremy Johnson ready to play in 2015 and the Eagles had Nick Foles who wasn’t doing to bad at quarterback for the Eagles last season.

Guess what?

Jeremy Johnson is a Total Bust and Nick Foles is playing for the St. Louis Rams who was replaced by Sam Bradford who would be lucky to be a water boy on the Coaches Hot Seat Flag Football Team forget about playing QB and right now the…

Philadelphia Eagles

AND

Auburn Tigers

….are both a Complete Freaking Disaster!

Oh…another thing…neither the Philadelphia Eagles nor the Auburn Tigers are playing ANY defense so put that REALITY on top of everything else and truly….

Gus Malzahn is facing nothing short of what Gene Chizik faced in 2012 when Auburn went 3 – 9 and 0 – 8 in SEC play and was rightly run out of Auburn on a rail!

Let’s look at the rest of Auburn’s schedule with the Tigers now at 1 – 2 on the season realizing that…

Gus Malzahn is 2 – 6 in his last 8 games at Auburn

Guz Malzahn is 10 – 6 in his last 16 games at Auburn

Mississippi State
San Jose State
At Kentucky
At Arkansas
Ole Miss
At Texas A&M
Georgia
Idaho
Alabama

In our opinion if Auburn plays like they did against LSU the Tigers will be lucky to win…

3 Games in 2015

ANY SEC Games in 2015

What if Auburn finished at…

3 – 9 Overall

0 – 8 in the SEC

…in 2015 would Gus Malzahn be sent packing as Gene Chizik was sent packing only two seasons ago with the same record after winning a National Championship considering Malzahn didn’t win a National Title two seasons ago when he had the chance?

What’s Good for the Chizik is Good for the Malzahn….right?

RIGHT!

Who would Auburn AD Jay Jacobs hire to replace the run out of Auburn Gus Malzahn to coach the Tigers into the future?

Well, based upon the amount of money Auburn has been spending to build a strong football program on The Plains does anyone doubt that Jacobs would fly down to Tallahassee and offer Jimbo Fisher $8 Million A Year…”Nick Saban Money”….to be the next head football coach at Auburn?

Would Jimbo Fisher accept an offer to become the Auburn head coach at $8 Million A Year?

Does it get HOT on The Plains of southwest Alabama in the Summer?

That would be a BIG YES!

Memo to Gus Malzahn: Nice try against LSU to get the Auburn offense going with Jeremy Johnson but now Gus….Johnson would be lucky to be running the scout team for the Coaches Hot Seat Flag Football Team forget about being in the 1 – 5 QB slots so why in the Hell is he the starting QB at Auburn? Oh, what’s behind Johnson is even worse? OK…that makes sense!

Memo No. 2 to Gus Malzahn: If you lose to Mississippi State on Saturday here is how you will know on whether to contact a Realtor or not to put your house on the market:

If Auburn AD Jay Jacobs starts saying things like…

“I am becoming very concerned in our fundamental approach to the game.”

…put the house on the market immediately!

8. Charlie Strong, Texas – The most amazing thing about the Texas loss to California on Saturday wasn’t the missed extra point at the end of the game BUT that the Texas Longhorns…

YES the Freaking Texas Longhorns!

…had to come storming back to almost tie a team in the California Bears that over the past THREE football seasons had won NINE football games TOTAL!

That is the REALITY of how far the Texas football program has fallen since Mack Brown lost to Alabama in the 2009 – 2010 Bogus BCS National Title Game!

Since that loss to Alabama in the Rose Bowl in Pasadena in January 2010 Texas has posted a combined record under Mack Brown and Charlie Strong of….

37 – 30!

This is the Texas Longhorns we are talking about here and although we will readily admit there is No Joy in Coaches Hot Seat-Ville putting Charlie Strong on the Hot Seat who two Coaches Hot Seat members first met in the early 1990s when Charlie was on Steve Spurrier’s staff at Florida the TRUTH is Texas football right now is very simply…

A Complete Freaking Disaster

…and the sad REALITY is that if Oliver Luck had been the AD at Texas in 2013 instead of the Sorry Excuse for a Human Being Steve Patterson that right now…in our opinion….the head coach of the Texas Longhorns would be none other than…

Nick Saban

Guess what Texas fans….and this is just our opinion here at Coaches Hot Seat and is the FIRM opinion of the two Coaches Hot Seat members that traveled to Tuscaloosa for the Ole Miss – Alabama game on Saturday and who are still in Tuscaloosa on this early Monday morning…

If Texas is looking for a new head football coach in December Nick Saban would be Very Damn Interested in that job

….because unlike Alabama which is rebuilding job that is PAST DONE Texas is a Complete Freaking Disaster that needs a HERO to save it and again our opinion here at Coaches Hot Seat:

Nick Saban has ONE more Act in his life on this Earth which would be capped by winning….

National Titles at LSU, Alabama and Texas!

You heard it here first!

As for Charlie Strong whose Texas team is now at 1 – 2 on the season Big 12 Conference play begins this Saturday against Oklahoma State in Austin and to that we can only say…

Good Luck Charlie!

9. George O’Leary, UCF – The UCF loss to Furman on Saturday confirmed of what we saw of UCF when they played Stanford in Week 2…

UCF is average at best and hardly coached team at worst

….and we agree completely with the following from Victory Way: UCF Blog for the UCF Fans…

Time for George to go, Harry P. Nolan, Victory Way

Up next for the 0 – 3 UCF which is now hardly coached by George O’Leary in our opinion…

At South Carolina

….in a Hot Seat vs. Hot Seat Head Coaching Match-Up against the Ole’ Ball Coach!

Speaking of the Ole’ Ball Coach!

10. Steve Spurrier, South Carolina – In the spring of this year a few Coaches Hot Seat members were up in South Carolina playing golf in the Greenville area and ran into some South Carolina Gamecock fans who were asked about the status of Steve Spurrier who will be FOREVER be known at Coaches Hot Seat as the…

Ole’ Ball Coach

…and one of those South Carolina fans said the following:

“I heard that Spurrier wanted to retire at the end of last season but that some folks got to him about all the other coaches that would be out of job if he retired and the Steve reluctantly decided to come back and coach in 2015 and see how things would turn out.”

Sorry….head coaches should not be staying in jobs to keep their assistant coaches and especially their sons employed and no matter what Steve Spurrier has done at South Carolina in the past in case the folks in South Carolina don’t know it the Gamecocks head coaching job is not something akin to the modern day Roman Empire or the USSR where the leaders get to hang around for as long as they want but instead South Carolina is in America and in America…

When you quit performing in your job…you get fired!

That’s how it is for most hard-working Americans making $50,000 or less a year and for Damn sure that is how it should be for football coaches making Millions of Dollars a year!

Steve Spurrier has no Damn “right” to stay as the head coach at South Carolina for as long as he wants but instead the people paying the bills….

The alums, boosters and fans of South Carolina

…will decide when Steve Spurrier will no longer be the head coach at USC unless of course the Ole’ Ball Coach decides first which based upon South Carolina’s remaining games in 2015 as detailed below will be the way this Shakespearean tragedy in Columbia will end later this year:

UCF
At Missouri
LSU
Vanderbilt
At Texas A&M
At Tennessee
Florida
The Citadel
Clemson

Anyone else thinking that the Ole’ Ball Coach and South Carolina will…

Win maybe….3 more games this season….before they play Clemson at home on November 28 in what will more than likely be the last game with the Ole’ Ball Coach on the sideline in his legendary playing and coaching career?

Anyone else thinking South Carolina will beat Clemson and send Steve Spurrier out a winner and that the next day Steve will be playing golf in Florida?

Thought so!

What is that monologue from William Shakespeare’s As You Like It, Act Two – Scene Seven, that for some reason fits in this spot when considering the playing and coaching career of the Great Steve Spurrier? Oh…here it is:

“All the world’s a stage,

And all the men and women merely players;
They have their exits and their entrances,
And one man in his time plays many parts,
His acts being seven ages. At first the infant,
Mewling and puking in the nurse’s arms.
Then, the whining school-boy with his satchel
And shining morning face, creeping like snail
Unwillingly to school. And then the lover,
Sighing like furnace, with a woeful ballad
Made to his mistress’ eyebrow. Then, a soldier,
Full of strange oaths, and bearded like the pard,
Jealous in honour, sudden, and quick in quarrel,
Seeking the bubble reputation
Even in the cannon’s mouth. And then, the justice,
In fair round belly, with a good capon lined,
With eyes severe, and beard of formal cut,
Full of wise saws, and modern instances,
And so he plays his part. The sixth age shifts
Into the lean and slippered pantaloon,
With spectacles on nose and pouch on side,
His youthful hose, well saved, a world too wide
For his shrunk shank, and his big manly voice,
Turning again toward childish treble, pipes
And whistles in his sound. Last scene of all,
That ends this strange eventful history,
Is second childishness and mere oblivion,