Tag Archive: Darrell Hazell

The Les Miles and Ron Turner Firings on Sunday – Post Week 4 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – These Hot Seat Coaches Need to Understand Mr. Cash That When You Make Millions of Dollars A Year…Your Ass Will Either Perform Or End Up On The Hot Seat! Give ‘Em Hell Johnny!

 

The Les Miles and Ron Turner Firings on Sunday

LesMiles811818

Many of us here at Coaches Hot Seat were flying back to San Francisco from Los Angeles on Sunday after seeing Stanford come back and beat UCLA on Saturday night at the Rose Bowl and as we tweeted out on Sunday…

We were surprised but not shocked that LSU fired Les Miles

…because we believe Totally in the saying that now former Florida AD Jeremy Foley has said many times during his great career as AD in Gainesville…

“What will have to be done eventually should be done immediately.”

…and No Damn Doubt in our minds Les Miles should have been fired at the end of the 2016 season because in our opinion…

Les Miles is Incredibly Stubborn and would rather LSU Football lose football games than Miles EVER having to admit that he was wrong about ANYTHING

…and anyone with a working brain knows that Les Miles’ brand of football should be tossed on the scrapheap of college football history and anyone that is considering hiring Les Miles in the future should understand that reality Very Damn Clearly!

The Win/Loss Numbers for Les Miles over the past THREE seasons…2014 – 2016…are Very Damn Ugly Indeed when one considers that during the past THREE seasons Miles has had Top 5 talent in college football and those Win/Loss numbers are…

Overall:  19 – 10

SEC:  10 – 8

Power 5 Schools:  12 – 10

…which is nothing short of a Total and Complete Disaster when you have…

TOP FIVE TALENT in College Football at LSU

…which makes it in our opinion that LSU was 10 Months Late in firing Les Miles and in the end if might cost LSU….

Tom Herman to Texas or USC!

coacho3818181

Let’s leave the who will be the next head coach at LSU speculation for another day and give a Hearty Congratulations for Coach Ed Orgeron who is now the…

Head Football Coach at LSU

LSUTigerStadium

…and who we hope can win many of the remaining games the Tigers have against…

Missouri
At Florida
Southern Miss
Ole Miss
Alabama
At Arkansas
South Alabama
At Texas A&M

…especially since LSU has MORE talent on its roster than every team left on its schedule except for Alabama.

One thing that Coach O said that caught our attention in his press conference on Monday was that LSU was going to…

“Spend less time on the practice field and more time in the meeting rooms.”

….which is what Pete Carroll did at USC and which as former football players here at Coaches Hot Seat is something we have believed in for 30+ years now going back to the Bill Walsh days at Stanford the first-time around.

As the great Alabama head coach Frank Thomas, who played for Knute Rockne at Notre Dame and coached Paul “Bear” Bryant at Alabama, once said:

“Keep the players high. Make practice a pleasure, not a lark. Be a disciplinarian, but not a slave driver. It’s better to have a short, full practice than a long lazy one.”

Amen to that Coach Thomas….and Coach O as well!

Give ‘Em Hell Coach O…and just like at USC…we will be pulling for you Coach!

RonTurner281818

On the Ron Turner firing at FIU it was no surprise to anyone here at Coaches Hot Seat that Ron Turner was fired in his FOURTH season at FIU where he put up records of…

Overall:  10 – 30

CUSA:  7 – 17

….because as we said when Ron Turner was hired…

FIU had no Damn Business hiring Ron Turner because if you are going to fire Mario Cristobal then you better Damn hire someone better than Cristobal and Ron Turner is not in the same world as Cristobal in coaching college football in the early part of the 21 st century…..PERIOD!

FIU should hire a young, fiery, smart, tenacious, hard-charging, fighting like Hell coach and just realize if the coach does a good job at FIU he will probably be off to a bigger job and then FIU should go out and hire another….

Young, fiery, smart, tenacious, hard-charging, fighting like Hell coach!

Do that FIU….just do that!

 

Post Week 4 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

A chair on fire... metaphor "In The Hot Seat"

These Hot Seat Coaches Need to Understand Mr. Cash That When You Make Millions of Dollars A Year…Your Ass Will Either Perform Or End Up On The Hot Seat! Give ‘Em Hell Johnny!

Post Week 4 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

ClayHelton27171771

1.  Clay Helton, USC – We spent several hours with an USC-alum friend of ours on this past Saturday night in Santa Monica after we watched Stanford come back and beat UCLA at the Rose Bowl and to say that our friend and many of his fellow USC-alum friends are PISSED-OFF about the current state of USC football would be a massive understatement!

Consider these numbers for a moment…since 2009 USC’s combined Pac-12 Conference record over the past 8 seasons now stands at…

40 – 25

…which includes USC head coaches Pete Carroll’s last year, Lane Kiffin, Ed Orgeron, Steve Sarkisian, and Clay Helton. Then consider the below numbers which is Alabama and Nick Saban’s record in SEC Conference play over the past 8 seasons…

48 – 8

NickSaban818181

Why do we mention Nick Saban and Alabama’s record in SEC Conference play over the past 8 seasons you ask?

Because an USC-alum that could buy and sell most of the Westside of Los Angeles on any given afternoon has it written on a dry erase board in his home office and those two numbers….USC and Alabama’s conference records since 2009….was written on that dry erase board by someone who is fed-up with what is going on with USC football, and who is now going around Los Angeles briefing other USC alums about just what in the Hell is going to happen at USC if Clay Helton doesn’t get things turned around with the Trojans…and in a Helluva hurry!

Here are the important win/loss records at USC for Clay Helton as this moment:

Overall:  7 – 7

Pac-12:  5 – 3

The word we got from our USC-alum friend on Saturday night….

Clay Helton either wins 7 games in 2016…meaning USC will need to win 6 of its last 8 games this season…or the Clay Helton era at USC will be over shortly after the Notre Dame game on November 26.

Oh..Clay Helton better Damn beat UCLA and Notre Dame in getting those 7 wins!

Our opinion after talking to our USC-alum friend on Saturday night for a few hours:

Clay Helton better win 7-plus games or there is going to be a MEGA OFFER by USC to hire Tom Herman in 6 or so weeks that will make Herman the highest-paid coach in college football and with that in mind we would recommend that Helton’s Trojans beat Arizona State on Saturday night at the LA Coliseum!

SteveAddazio1181818

2.  Steve Addazio, Boston College – Steve Addazio’s Boston College team beat Total Damn Cupcake Wagner on Saturday which raised the Eagles overall record in 2016 to…

2 – 2

….which leaves Addazio’s win/loss records in four seasons at…

Overall:  19 – 23

ACC:  8 – 18

…and on Saturday BC plays host to Buffalo in a game that we would recommend Steve Addazio NOT lose because if the Eagles did lose to a Buffalo team at home then Addazio might not be the BC coach by Noon on Sunday!

It’s all very simple for Steve Addazio in 2016 IF Boston College can beat Buffalo on Saturday:

Win at least 6 games and Addazio will get another season at BC.

Don’t win at least 6 games and the Boston College job will open up in late November…if not sooner!

CharlieStrong288118

3.  Charlie Strong, Texas – Our Texas-alum friends are NOT Stupid and after Texas got beat by what many of us think is just an average California team coupled with Notre Dame’s defense being more porous than a 3-year old sponge Charlie Strong is now in a very dangerous spot where Charlie will either win several critical games coming up or he might be out of a job before the 2016 season is half over.

The numbers or Charlie Strong at Texas are very mediocre…

Overall:  13 – 15

Big 12:  9 – 9

…and even though we think the world of Charlie and are hoping he can turn Texas back into a college football power the TRUTH is that Notre Dame’s Total Damn Collapse has turned up the heat on Strong who is facing TWO CRITICAL games in the next TWO weeks…

At Oklahoma State
Oklahoma

….that with TWO losses could very well lead to Charlie Strong being shown the door before the Longhorns play Iowa State on October 15.

Oh Yes…Charlie Strong is in a very precarious situation and from what we have been told…

“Anything less than 8 wins in 2016 and Charlie is done….PERIOD!”

….because the Texas boys with very deep pockets are not going to be left on the outside looking in on the Tom Herman sweepstakes and if a change in the head coaching job at Texas has to be made and USC is offering Tom Herman…

$8 Million A Year

…the Texas Boys will go with…

$9 Million A Year!

Our recommendation to Charlie Strong:

Beat Oklahoma State on Saturday Charlie and for God’s Sake…start playing some Damn Defense!

TimDerutyer2381818

4.  Tim DeRuyter, Fresno State – The numbers since Fresno State won the Mountain West Conference title for the second straight time in 2013 are very ugly indeed for Tim DeRuyter and his Bulldogs….since 2013 Fresno State’s records at…

Overall:  10 – 18

MWC:  7 – 13

…and a home loss to Tulsa in two overtimes on Saturday just made things that much worse and now it’s either…

Start Winning Some Football Games

…for Tim DeRuyter or there will be a new head football coach for Fresno State come sometime in December.

How many games does Tim DeRuyter need to win in 2016 to keep his job?

At least 6 games total Tim…at least 6 games.

Now at 1 – 3 on the season and these games still left to be played…

At UNLV
At Nevada
San Diego State
At Utah State
Air Force
At Colorado State
Hawaii
San Jose State

….can the Bulldogs win 5 of their last 8 games?

If they can’t then Tim DeRuyter NEEDS to be fired!

PaulHaynes91919100

5.  Paul Haynes, Kent State – With the Alabama whipping of Kent State on Saturday Paul Haynes record coaching the Golden Flashes over the last FOUR seasons now stands at…

Overall:  10 – 29

MAC:  6 – 17

…and with KSU now at 1 – 3 on the 2016 season either Haynes will get his team to 6 wins in 2016 or Kent State will be looking for a new head coach come December.

Next up for Paul Haynes and Kent State…

Akron and head coach Terry Bowden at home on Saturday!

Good Luck with that Paul!

GusMalzahn11818

6.  Gus Malzahn, Auburn – We especially wanted to talk to some our Auburn friends after the Tigers close win over LSU on Saturday to get their opinions on the future of Gus Malzahn and it took until Tuesday afternoon to reach all of them and the general consensus among the Auburn alums we talked to is this…

Gus Malzahn will more than likely be back to coach at Auburn in 2017 IF the Tigers at least SEVEN games in 2016 and with that in mind and Auburn now sitting on a 2 – 2 record this season here is what AU have left to play:

La. Monroe
At Mississippi State
Arkansas
At Ole Miss
Vanderbilt
At Georgia
Alabama A&M
At Alabama

So Gus Malzahn has to win FIVE of his last EIGHT games to return as the Auburn coach in 2017 and he has…

TWO Total Damn Cupcakes in La. Monroe and Alabama A&M

Cupcakes81188

….so Malzahn has to win THREE of SIX games against…

At Mississippi State
Arkansas
At Ole Miss
Vanderbilt
At Georgia
At Alabama

Our opinion…if Gus Malzahn can’t win THREE of the above SIX games then he should be fired shortly after the Alabama game on November 26 because EVEN IF Malzahn finished at…

7 – 5

…in 2016 his win/loss records over the last THREE seasons…2014 – 2016….would stand at:

Overall:  22 – 16

SEC:  10 – 14

….and a coach at Auburn cannot possibly survive posting a record in SEC Conference play over three years of…

10 – 14

….right?

Hell…maybe the folks around and support Auburn Football are now willing to accept…

Average As Hell

….but then at Auburn a 10 – 14 SEC Conference record over three years isn’t even…

Average As Hell

….it’s MUCH WORSE!

Oh…if La. Monroe happened to beat Auburn on Saturday which is coached by Matt Viator who is a pretty Damn good football coach then we recommend the Alabama media pay close attention because we rather doubt that Gus Malzahn will be the head coach at Auburn by Noon on Sunday!

WillMuschamp1717171

7.  Will Muschamp, South Carolina – Some…make that Many…will say that it’s crazy to have Will Muschamp on the Hot Seat in his first year at South Carolina BUT we have a couple of close friends that are South Carolina alumni who have plenty of friends who were…

None Too Happy About Will Muschamp’s Hiring at USC

…and who are more than willing to throw their weight around if the 2016 season should turn into a…

Total and Complete Disaster for Muschamp at USC

….and if you can’t beat Kentucky….the 2016 season has the potential to turn into a…

Total and Complete Disaster for Muschamp at USC!

Now at 2 – 2 on the season Will Muschamp and South Carolina still have 8 games left against…

Texas A&M
Georgia
UMass
Tennessee
Missouri
At Florida
Western Carolina
At Clemson

…and we would recommend…and we are pulling for Will Muschamp….to win at least…

THREE of the last EIGHT games

…because if for some reason South Carolina finishes the 2016 season with wins only over…

Vanderbilt
East Carolina
UMass
Western Carolina

….we could recommend folks keep their eyes on Columbia come late November…just saying!

BrianKelly171717

8.  Brian Kelly, Notre Dame – One thing we tell our young employees is…

When you get into a position of power don’t be an Arrogant Ass

….because when you fail…and EVERYONE will fail at some time in their life….the people that sign your paychecks….

The Alumni, Boosters, and Fans of Notre Dame Football for Brian Kelly

….will be more likely to…

Kick Your Arrogant Ass to the Curb

…and that is what Brian Kelly is now facing if the 2016 season should turn into a Total and Complete Disaster after losses to Texas, Michigan State, and Duke to open the 2016 season.

Now at 1 – 3 the Non-Fighting Irish still have games against….

Syracuse
At NC State
Stanford
Miami
Navy
Army
Virginia Tech
At USC

….and it’s just a humble guess by the folks here at Coaches Hot Seat but we are thinking Notre Dame will win…

4….maybe 5…games in 2016

….and if Notre Dame wins 4…maybe 5…games in 2016…

Notre Dame will be looking for a new head football coach shortly after the USC game on November 26…

COUNT ON IT!

darrellhazell18818

9.  Darrell Hazell, Purdue – Darrell Hazell and his Purdue football team got a nice win at home over Nevada on Saturday which leaves Hazell’s records in FOUR seasons at the school at…

Overall:  8 – 31

Big Ten:  2 – 22

….and we have it on what we call Very Damn Good Authority that if Hazell wins less than 6 games in 2016 Purdue will be looking for a new head football coach shortly after the Indiana game on September 26!

Up next for Darrell Hazell and Purdue….at Maryland which has a first year coach in his first head coaching job which is a game that Purdue and Hazell SHOULD win but will they…

Not Bloody Likely!

MarkStoops3891818

10.  Mark Stoops, Kentucky – We don’t know a whole lot of people around the University of Kentucky since we don’t follow college basketball like we do college football BUT we did reach what will call a “person of interest” in the Lexington area who told us on Monday of this week that…

“If Mark Stoops wins five games in 2016….Hell, maybe four games in 2016 he will be back to coach Kentucky next season.”

Geez…in your FOURTH year on the job at Kentucky you can win FOUR games and keep your job?

Well…this is Kentucky Football we are talking about here BUT with Kentucky now at 2 – 2 on the season and these games still to be played…

At Alabama
Vanderbilt
Mississippi State
At Missouri
Georgia
At Tennessee
Austin Peay
At Louisville

…can Mark Stoops and the Wildcats win just TWO of their last EIGHT games to save Mark Stoops job?

Now that is just Damn Silly that you can KEEP your job by winning TWO of your last EIGHT games but then can UK and Stoops even do that?

Maybe….Just Damn Maybe!

If Mark Stoops does win only 3 games in 2016…

Kentucky will be looking for a new head football coach shortly after Bobby Petrino and Louisville BEATS the Living Hell out of the Wildcats on November 26!

Post Week 3 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – It’s Early In The Season Yes…But That Doesn’t Mean Mr. Johnny Cash Isn’t Already Giving These Hot Seat Coaches Hell!

 

Post Week 3 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

A chair on fire... metaphor "In The Hot Seat"

It’s Early In The Season Yes…But That Doesn’t Mean Mr. Johnny Cash Isn’t Already Giving These Hot Seat Coaches Hell!

Post Week 3 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

GusMalzahn11818

1.  Gus Malzahn, Auburn – The most shocking thing about the…

Fall of Gus Malzahn at Auburn

…is how Fast + Far the Fall has been and if one goes back to Saturday, October 4, 2014 which is the day that Auburn beat LSU at home by the score of…

41 – 7

….over the past two-plus seasons Gus Malzahn has posted TWO records that are nothing less than a…

Total and Complete Disaster at Auburn!

In Gus Malzahn’s Last 18 games against Power 5 Conference Schools his win/loss record is…

5 – 13

….and in Gus Malzahn’s Last 15 SEC Conference Games his win/loss record is…

4 – 11

Sorry….NO Coach can survive those kinds of records at Auburn and that means the BIGGEST game of Gus Malzahn’s coaching career is this coming Saturday night at home against an LSU team that is wobbling as well and also has a coach on the Hot Seat in Les Miles because very simply….

Gus Malzahn CANNOT Lose to LSU at home on Saturday night!

According to Tyler Thompson at Kentucky Sports Radio who did a nice breakdown of the current buyouts in the SEC…

Comparing Mark Stoops’ buyout to the rest of the SEC, Tyler Thompson, Kentucky Sports Radio

….Gus Malzahn’s buyout if fired at the end of the 2016 season would be…

$8.95 Million Dollars

….which is Beyond Damn Absurd although not as Absurd as the $12 Million Dollars that Kentucky would owe Mark Stoops if fired, and if we were in a position of power at Auburn University right now we would be wondering?

Who in the Hell is hiring and signing these Beyond Damn Absurd contracts with Auburn Head Football Coaches that would if Gus Malzahn is fired after this season lead to Auburn paying out…

North of $20 Million Dollars to buyout Tommy Tuberville, Gene Chizik and Gus Malzahn!

auburnadjacobs72721

That would be Auburn AD Jay Jacobs who is a Helluva nice man and talented college athletic sports administrator but unfortunately it seems that Jay like many ADs in FBS today have…

No Damn Respect for other people’s money meaning the Fans, Boosters, Alumni and anyone else that spends their hard-earned money on Auburn Football and Athletics!

Our opinion on the Auburn situation: If Auburn can’t beat what is a Very Average LSU team at home on The Plains the Tigers will be lucky to win…

6 Games in 2016!

Yes…it’s that bad at Auburn and someone at Auburn better have a Damn plan in place if the 2016 season melts down in the coming weeks!

SteveAddazio1181818

2.  Steve Addazio, Boston College – Let this sink in for a moment…

In Steve Addazio’s 41 st game at Boston College in his FOURTH season on the job his BC football team just got beat…

49 – 0

….by a team in Virginia Tech with a first-year head coach in Justin Fuente who took over a Hokies team that won SIX games in the 2015 regular season!

There is NO DAMN EXCUSE for Steve Addazio to take a team to Blacksburg and lose 49 – 0 to what is still a finding-its-way Virginia Tech team and with that loss Steve Addazio’s records at BC dropped to…

Overall:  18 – 23

ACC:  8 – 18

….and over the last two seasons Steve Addazio is now sitting on a record of…

4 – 11!

Geez….you think things are coming apart at Boston College with the Eagles next REAL game after playing Cupcakes Wagner and Buffalo in the next two weeks being Clemson at home?

Yes…things are coming apart at Boston College and the word on the street in Boston where it seems BC-alums are finally coming to their senses before their football program goes in the totally in the toilet…

Anything less than 6 wins in 2016 and Steve Addazio is DONE come late November.

DarrellHazell18818

3.  Darrell Hazell, Purdue – Purdue has a bye in Week 3 and gets back to playing with a home game against Nevada on Saturday in a game that flat-out…

Darrell Hazell CANNOT Lose

….because a loss to Nevada to drop to 1 – 2 on the season with NINE Big Ten games left to play would be…

Forget Turning Out the Lights Because There is No Damn Electricity

….for the Purdue Boilermakers in 2016!

ClayHelton27171771

4.  Clay Helton, USC – It hasn’t been easy to reach our USC-alum friends especially as they let sink in that..

Stanford has won EIGHT of the last TEN games against USC

StanfordFootballStad181881

….but we did get what we will call a Very Damn Influential USC-alum on the phone on Monday morning at his office overlooking the Pacific Ocean in Santa Monica and here is what he said about Clay Helton when asked…

“Clay Helton is a nice man but anything less than NINE wins this season and it’s over for Clay. We know (meaning USC-alums) we will have to raise a lot of money to get someone like Tom Herman, but we are determined to make USC football relevant again whatever the cost may be.”

santamonicapic811822

With the above in mind USC plays at Utah on Saturday and with a loss Clay Helton’s overall record coaching the Trojans would drop to…

7 – 7

…and we recommend to Clay Helton that…

Your Trojans BEAT Utah Son!

Oh…what is a “lot of money” in the mind of a Very Damn Influential USC-alum to hire someone like Tom Herman you ask?

$10M A Year meaning the Highest Paid Coach in College Football!

Yep…USC-alums are not happy and they are willing to take out their checkbooks to show just how unhappy they are with the current state of USC Football!

LesMiles811818

5.  Les Miles, LSU – Talk about what would be nothing less than a…

Total and Complete Disaster

…what if Les Miles LSU team went to Auburn this coming Saturday night and lost to Auburn team that looks like it has No Damn Clue what stadium it is playing in?

Oh that would be a…Total and Complete Disaster…which is why this Saturday’s LSU vs. Auburn game is one of those….

A CANNOT Lose Game for both Les Miles and Gus Malzahn

…with the losing coach being taken straight to Cape Kennedy after the game to be put on a rocket to launch him and his ass Straight Towards the Face of the Sun!

OK…we have seen LSU play against Wisconsin, Jacksonville State, and Mississippi State this year and the Tigers looked like a very AVERAGE football team in all three games and if one looks at what is left on LSU’s schedule…

At Auburn
Missouri
At Florida
Southern Miss
Ole Miss
Alabama
At Arkansas
South Alabama
At Texas A&M

…how many games can Les Miles and his football team realistically win in 2016?

We say…no more than EIGHT games and anything less than TEN wins and Les Miles is done come December and if LSU fans want to hire Tom Herman or Bobby Petrino for that matter they better like our USC-alum friends be ready to…

Write Some BIG Checks!

RonTurner281818

6.  Ron Turner, Florida International – With the FIU loss to UMass on Saturday head coach Ron Turner’s records at FIU now stand at…

Overall:  10 – 29

CUSA:  7 – 17

….an do we need to write any more about Ron Turner at FIU?

NO is the answer to that question!

MarkStoops3891818

7.  Mark Stoops, Kentucky – At first we thought it was an Internet Joke that Kentucky head coach Mark Stoops had a…

$12 Million Dollar Buyoutat Kentucky but as Tyler Thompson has shown doing some great research…

Comparing Mark Stoops’ buyout to the rest of the SEC, Tyler Thompson, Kentucky Sports Radio

…that $12 Million Dollar buyout DO BE TRUE which again shows that another AD…this time Kentucky AD Mitch Barnhart…doesn’t…

Know His Ass From the Side of a Barn

kentuckyadmitchbarn71717

….because when Mark Stoops was given this Totally Damn Absurd Contract and Buyout…

Mark Stoops had done NOTHING to have earned such a RICH payout

…but then don’t feel bad Mitch Barnhart…

College Athletics is riddled with Total Damn Complete Moron ADs that seem to love giving away Other People’s Hard-Earned Money!

With Kentucky’s come from behind win over woeful New Mexico State on Saturday Mark Stoops records at UK now stand at…

Overall:  13 – 26

SEC:  4 – 21

….and with these games still left on the Wildcats schedule…

South Carolina
At Alabama
Vanderbilt
Mississippi State
At Missouri
Georgia
At Tennessee
Austin Peay
At Louisville

….we don’t see Kentucky winning more than…

FOUR Games in 2016

…and even though Kentucky would owe Mark Stoops the Totally Damn Absurd…

$12 Million Dollars

…if fired after the season how could Kentucky keep on a head football coach that won…

FOUR Games in his FOURTH season on the job?

They COULD NOT is the answer to that question!

CharlieStrong288118

8.  Charlie Strong, Texas – A few Coaches Hot Seat members were at the Texas – Cal game at Memorial Stadium on Saturday night and the word they brought back to us on Sunday was that….

Texas let the Cal wide-receivers run wild and didn’t pressure the Bears QB

…and if you allow that to happen with ANY spread-passing offensive attack as Cal…and many Big 12 schools now run….you are going to give up a Helluva LOT of points and…

Giving up 50 Points to Cal when Cal only scored 51 on woeful Hawaii and only 40 on San Diego State

…is not only Not Freaking Acceptable is it borderline a Firing Offense when you are in your THIRD season on the job as Charlie Strong is at Texas.

The Problem that Charlie Strong is now facing is that many schools in the Big 12 play an offense just like Cal’s and Charlie better get the Texas Defense fixed and quick because look what’s coming up for the Horns…

At Oklahoma State
Oklahoma
Iowa State
At Kansas State
Baylor
At Texas Tech
West Virginia
At Kansas
TCU

Hell…if Texas plays like they did against Cal the rest of the season the Horns will win….

FIVE…Maybe SIX Games in 2016 and if that happens…

Charlie Strong will NOT be the head coach at Texas come December….PERIOD!

TimDerutyer2381818

9.  Tim DeRuyter, Fresno State – Since Tim DeRuyter and his Fresno State football team won the Mountain West Conference in 2013 his Bulldogs have posted records over the past three seasons of…

Overall:  10 – 19

MWC:  7 – 9

…and the proud folks that support Fresno State football are just NOT going to tolerate that kind of football for much longer and thus why Tim DeRuyter better get things turned around in the Valley or he will be out of a job at the end of this season.

Now at 1 – 2 on the season and looking at what is left on Fresno State’s schedule in 2016…

Tulsa
At UNLV
At Nevada
San Diego State
At Utah State
Air Force
At Colorado State
Hawaii
San Jose State

…there is NO reason for the Bulldogs to win less than…

SEVEN Games in 2016

…and SEVEN Wins in 2016 is probably what DeRuyter needs to keep his job at Fresno State!

PaulHaynes91919100

10.  Paul Haynes, Kent State – Hey, Hey, Hey…Kent State and head coach Paul Haynes got a win on Saturday against Monmouth which is enough to temper much of the enthusiasm for the win….especially when one sees who the Golden Flashes are playing next…

Alabama in Tuscaloosa!

BryantDenny2919191

Uhhhh…Good Luck with that Paul Haynes!

Paul Hayne’s win/loss records in FOUR seasons at Kent State:

Overall:  10 – 28

MAC:  6 – 17

Make that 10 – 29 with the Crimson Tide looming!

Post Week 2 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 1 – 10 Hot Seat Head Coaches – These Coaches on the Hot Seat might not like it Mr. Cash…but Give Them Hell Anyway!

 

Post Week 2 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 1 – 10 Hot Seat Head Coaches

A chair on fire... metaphor "In The Hot Seat"

These Coaches on the Hot Seat might not like it Mr. Cash…but Give Them Hell Anyway!

Post Week 2 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

LesMiles811818

1.  Les Miles, LSU – When you have a quarterback that has played as much football as LSU QB Brandon Harris it’s the Height of Idiocy for that QB to have his head coach saying things like this about him…

“We’re trying to get Brandon comfortable and settled down,” Miles said, “but I don’t know if that will happen.”

….because reality is Les Miles…either Brandon Harris is by now…

Ready to Play Football or Not Ready to Play Football

…and any random teenager that is fan of the great game of football can see that…

Brandon Harris is just Flat-Out NOT Ready to Play Football!

We don’t have a clue if Purdue transfer QB Danny Etling is the answer to LSU’s offensive woes but we for Damn sure know…

There are at least three dozen 30, 40, and 50 something old former football players that are members at Coaches Hot Seat that are much older than LSU QB Brandon Harris who are right now BETTER quarterbacks than Brandon Harris will EVER be in college and with that in mind…

It’s time for Les Miles to ride Danny Etling to try and get his ass off the Hot Seat because if Brandon Harris is the LSU QB in 2016

….Les Miles will be working on TV in 2017 doing analyst work on games which isn’t a bad gig but for Damn sure it’s not the same as being the head coach of the….

LSU Tigers Football Team!

Can’t you just see Les Miles doing color on a football game on TV = “He really gave him his chest on that play!”

Yes…a win over a decent FCS team in Jacksonville State is nice but let’s not forget that in Les Miles last 20 football games against Power 5 Conference Teams he has a record of…

12 – 8

…and now over the next four weeks of the season Les Miles and LSU will get to play what is no doubt the most crucial stretch in Miles head coaching career against the following teams:

Mississippi State
At Auburn
Missouri
At Florida

The TRUTH is that if Les Miles loses just 2 of the next 4 games against the above teams the chances of Miles returning to coach at LSU in 2017 drop to around 10% because with 3 losses on the board with still games against..

A Pretty Good Southern Miss team
Ole Miss
Alabama
At Arkansas
South Alabama
At Texas A&M

….there is no way in Hell LSU loses fewer than FOUR games in 2016 and from what we have been told if LSU loses more than THREE games this season…

Les Miles is DONE in Baton Rouge

….and even THREE losses might lead to Miles firing come December if one of those losses to Alabama again.

Bottom-Line in the immediate future for Les Miles at LSU:

LSU CANNOT lose at home to Mississippi State on Saturday night….PERIOD!

GusMalzahn11818

2.  Gus Malzahn, Auburn – As Gus Malzahn knows Arkansas State has a decent football program that has achieved a lot in recent years with a very small amount of resources especially compared to place like Auburn where Gus Malzahn has…

EVERYTHING HE NEEDS

….to win football games, SEC Conference Titles, and National Championships which brings us to the important numbers as it related to Gus Malzahn at Auburn.

Forget about Gus Malzahn’s first year at Auburn in 2013 which included just Total Fluke wins over both Georgia and Alabama which launched the Tigers into the National Title game and focus instead on the last three seasons…

2014 – 2016

….because the TREND is what is important for Malzahn and over the last three seasons Gus Malzahn’s records at Auburn now stand at:

Overall:  16 – 12

SEC:  6 – 10

Sorry….NO Coach can survive the above win-loss numbers at Auburn over even a short period of time with the amount of money that Auburn Athletics is spending on the Tigers football program which is really not an identifiable number since there is…

NOTHING

…that Gus Malzahn could ask for and not get which means that either Gus Malzahn performs in 2016 or there will be a new head coach of the Auburn Tigers come before the New Year.

Now at 1 – 1 on the season and Gus Malzahn needing from what we have been told in recent days…

“At least 8 wins to keep his job.”

….means that Malzahn and his Tigers will need to find 7 wins out of their remaining 10 games against:

Texas A&M
LSU
La. Monroe
At Mississippi State
Arkansas
At Ole Miss
Vanderbilt
At Georgia
Alabama A&M
At Alabama

Well…Auburn will certainly beat La. Monroe and Alabama A&M which gives Malzahn…

3 Wins

….which means the Tigers will need to win 5 of their remaining 8 games against…

Texas A&M
LSU
At Mississippi State
Arkansas
At Ole Miss
Vanderbilt
At Georgia
At Alabama

…and if you give Auburn a win over Vandy that is…4 wins against the below 7 teams…

Texas A&M
LSU
At Mississippi State
Arkansas
At Ole Miss
At Georgia
At Alabama

Hell…if Gus Malzahn and Auburn can’t win 4 games against the above 7 teams with the amount of resources and talent that Malzahn has access to then no doubt in our minds….

Gus Malzahn SHOULD be fired shortly after the Iron Bowl against Alabama in late November!

Do you think it’s important for Gus Malzahn and his Tigers to win the next 2 home games against Texas &M and LSU?

You Better Damn Believe Winning Those Two Games Is VERY Damn Important!

MarkStoops3891818

3.  Mark Stoops, Kentucky – In his third year at Kentucky with Mark Stoops sitting on records of…

Overall:  12 – 26

SEC:  4 – 21

….and regardless of the size of Stoops buyout the margin of error is becoming smaller and smaller for Bob Stoops younger brother starting with a MUST WIN game against New Mexico State on Saturday in Lexington which with a loss would…

Effectively END the Mark Stoops Era at Kentucky

This is all very Damn simple for Mark Stoops….a defensive coach like Stoops just flat-out CANNOT give up…

44 points to Southern Miss
45 points to Florida

….and keep his job and with New Mexico State beating New Mexico this past weekend there could be a new name for “Waterloo” in the English language…

“Lexington” meaning when an era came to an end in America with this era being the Mark Stoops one at Kentucky!

DarrellHazell18818

4.  Darrell Hazell, Purdue – Sorry…but in your FOURTH season at a Big Ten school like Purdue you should NOT be losing at home to a team like Cincinnati and with that loss to the Bearcats Darrell Hazell’s records with the Boilermakers drops to…

Overall:  7 – 31

Big Ten:  2 – 22

….and if the current trend continues one would think that Purdue will have a new head football coach come December.

Oh…a good way for Darrell Hazell to stop the “trend” would be for his football team to beat Nevada at home in their next game on September 24 before the Big Ten season gets underway!

SteveAddazio1181818

5.  Steve Addazio, Boston College – Steve Addazio’s Boston College football team HAD to beat UMass on Saturday and the Eagles got that win but then we are still talking about…

UMass

….which is about equal to beating a plate of cupcakes on any kitchen counter and that is why Addazio’s BC team needs to keep the ball rolling by beating Virginia Tech on Saturday in Blacksburg with what should be EASY WINS against Wagner and Buffalo looming in Weeks 4 and 5.

We finally got an old Boston friend of ours on the phone this past week and he did some asking around with his Boston College friends on what Addazio has to do to return for the 2017 season as head coach of the BC Eagles and his findings are:

“Win 7 football games….isn’t that pitiful?”

There you have it Steve Addazio…”win 7 football games” in your FOURTH season on the job and you will get a FIFTH season at BC!

As Jed Clampett used to tell Jethro….”Pitiful…Just Pitiful!”

JedClampett181818

PaulHaynes91919100

6.  Paul Haynes, Kent State – Paul Haynes Kent State football team lost to North Carolina A&T over the weekend in FOUR overtimes so give the Flashes props for playing hard but with that loss to NC A&T Paul Haynes records at Kent State dropped to…

Overall:  9 – 27

MAC:  6 – 17

….and remember Haynes took over a Flashes team that had won 11 games in 2012 under former KSU head coach Darrell Hazell!

darrellhazell172727

Hey…there’s a thought! When Darrell Hazell gets his ass fired by Purdue later this year he should come back and coach Kent State where he won 11 games in 2012!

RonTurner281818

7.  Ron Turner, Florida International – Ron Turner’s FIU team lost to Maryland on Saturday…

Alert the Press…..NOT!

…and now in his FOURTH season as the head coach at FIU Ron Turner’s records now stand at:

Overall:  10 – 28

CUSA:  7 – 17

Forget Turn Out the Lights the Party’s Over…..this Ron Turner Party at FIU NEVER Got Started!

WillMuschamp1717171

8.  Will Muschamp, South Carolina – We watched most of the Mississippi State – South Carolina game last night when it was being replayed on one of the ESPN channels and if TRUTH be neither…

MSU or USC looked like very good football teams

….not that Will Muschamp really needs a very good football team in his first season in Columbia because what he needs is SIX wins to get his ass off the Hot Seat and with these games left…

East Carolina
At Kentucky
Texas A&M
Georgia
UMass
Tennessee
Missouri
At Florida
Western Carolina
At Clemson

….can Coach Boom find FIVE more wins among the remaining TEN games?

Well…let’s give USC the UMass and Western Carolina games which means Coach Boom needs THREE more wins out of the remaining EIGHT games…

Hell, if Will Muschamp can’t win THREE of EIGHT football games we will fly to Columbia in early December and fire his ass ourselves!

ClayHelton27171771

9.  Clay Helton, USC – Someone at USC got the message that Clay Helton’s ass will be run out of Los Angeles if the Trojans don’t win a Helluva lot more than SIX games in 2016 and on Saturday USC played with a lot more focus against Utah State winning 45 – 7 and up next is…

Mighty Stanford on The Farm!

For those that follow Stanford Football closely as we do here at Coaches Hot Seat it is historical that Stanford is going for…

7 wins in the last 10 games against USC

StanfordFootballStad181881

….on Saturday and even with the Trojans struggling it should be a Helluva football game because the Cardinal has a number of problems it needs to fix on both sides of the ball in what is clearly…

A MUST and DESPERATE TO WIN GAME for both Stanford and USC

….which is the kind of football game we love to watch and attend and no doubt there will be two dozen-plus from Coaches Hot Seat on The Farm on Saturday and with that mind…

Let’s Play some USC vs. Stanford Football!

As for Clay Helton the latest we have heard from our USC-alum friends in Los Angeles…

Anything LESS than 8 wins and USC is looking for a new head coach come December and that is straight from someone that could…

Buy and Sell most of Santa Monica this afternoon!

santamonicapic8118

KevinSumlin1818181

10.  Kevin Sumlin, Texas A&M – Kevin Sumlin GOT the start he had to have to begin the 2016 season with wins over UCLA and Prairie View BUT what our A&M-alum family members and friends are watching is Sumlin’s record in SEC Conference play which in his FIFTH season on the job in College Station stands at…

17 – 15

….and the TRUTH is…

If Kevin Sumlin goes 4 – 4 or worse in SEC Conference play in 2016 he is DONE at Texas A&M…PERIOD.

Yes…the Auburn game on Saturday on The Plains is HUGE for both Gus Malzahn and Kevin Sumlin and that’s what makes the game so Damn delicious to those of us in the peanut gallery!

Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash! – The TENTH Season of Coaches Hot Seat Is Now Underway! – Let’s Play Football!

 

Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

A chair on fire... metaphor "In The Hot Seat"

It’s been quite awhile since we have typed this so this feels rather good….give these Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

LesMiles811818  

1.  Les Miles, LSU – We waited a day to write the Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Analysis to talk to our good friends in Baton Rouge…who have been struggling mightily in recent weeks….about the Tigers loss to Wisconsin, and needless to say the general feeling from the folks we have talked to down on the bayou now believe they have been taken for a ride and left on the side of the road by Les Miles and more importantly that as one LSU-alum friend told us….

“It’s clear now that Les Miles will take down the LSU football program on the cross of his massive ego!”

An interesting record that we have been tracking here at Coaches Hot Seat is Les Miles’ record against Power 5 Conference Schools since the beginning of the 2014 college football season which after the loss to Wisconsin now stands at….

2014:  5 – 4
2015:  7 – 3
2016:  0 – 1

12 – 8  (.600)

….which is a STUNNING and DISASTROUS record considering the amount of talent that ANY coach can recruit to LSU on a regular basis and that over the past three football seasons the TRUTH is…

LSU has had and now has on campus as much talent as any team in college football….PERIOD!

We asked a good LSU-Cajun friend of ours in Baton Rouge to tell us what is coming down the pike for Les Miles and the Tigers and his response on Tuesday was…

“I don’t know, but if LSU loses to Jacksonville State Les Miles and Cam Cameron will be fired on Saturday night before they leave the athletic offices and Ed Orgeron will be the interim head coach of the Tigers.”

Hmmmm….checking the latest FCS Coaches Rankings from September 5, 2016 Jacksonville State is now ranked…

#5 in the country in FCS Football

…but has what…

10 to 15 times LESS talent than LSU?

Yep…that’s about right and if Jacksonville State does beat LSU on Saturday Les Miles should be fired on the spot before he leaves Tiger Stadium and he should be forced to clean-out his office before he leaves the LSU campus….in our humble opinion….ditto for Cam Cameron.

If LSU does beat Jacksonville State next up is a Mississippi State team at home that just lost to South Alabama and Auburn football program on the road that on offense looks in about much disarray as a team can look above the Pee Wee football level in America!

Speaking of the Auburn Tigers…

GusMalzahn11818

2.  Gus Malzahn, Auburn – Beyond the fact that the Clemson offense didn’t look like it had a Damn clue to what it was doing on Saturday night which may or may not have something to do with improved play by the Auburn defense, we here at Coaches Hot Seat just don’t…

Have A Damn Freaking Clue what Gus Malzahn was doing on Saturday night with the Auburn offense and quarterbacks and we have the sneaking suspicion that Gus Malzahn Doesn’t Have A Damn Freaking Clue what he is doing either!

The calculus at Auburn is very easy to understand…

Anything less than 8 wins and Gus Malzahn and more than likely Auburn AD Jay Jacobs are both DONE on The Plains come December and with the loss to Clemson and this schedule left to be played….

Arkansas State
Texas A&M
LSU
La. Monroe
At Mississippi State
Arkansas
At Ole Miss
Vanderbilt
At Georgia
Alabama A&M
At Alabama

….we only see THREE…MAYBE….FOUR more sure wins left on Auburn’s schedule and giving Gus Malzahn FOUR wins from the remaining 11 games that means the Tigers will have to find FOUR other wins somehow in 2016 and even if the Auburn defense is much improved does anyone think the Tigers offense will be anything but…

The Biggest Damn Disaster in College Football in 2016?

Good Luck to Gus Malzahn and if Auburn loses to Arkansas State at home on Saturday….

Gus Malzahn might very well be fired before he leaves the Auburn campus on Saturday night!

SteveAddazio1181818

3.  Steve Addazio, Boston College – Both Georgia Tech and Boston College looked like very AVERAGE football teams in their little sojourn to Dublin, Ireland to play a football game, and if there is one thing that Steve Addazio cannot afford in 2016 is for his Eagles football team to be AVERAGE again and with that loss to the Yellow Jackets Addazio is now facing the BIGGEST game of his tenure at BC this Saturday in an away game against…

UMass

With a road game at Virginia Tech up next there is the real chance that…

Steve Addazio could be fired on Saturday evening if his BC Eagles lose to UMass and in our opinion in his FOURTH season at Boston College if Addazio should lose to UMass on Saturday…

Steve Addazio SHOULD be fired on Saturday night!

Just for the record Steve Addazio’s records in FOUR seasons at BC now stand at:

Overall:  17 – 22

ACC:  8 – 17

MarkStoops3891818

4.  Mark Stoops, Kentucky – The MOST shocking number in the Southern Miss win over Kentucky by the score of…

44 – 35

…was that Southern Miss scored 44 points on Kentucky in Mark Stoops 37 th game as the head coach of the Wildcats and Mark Stoops is supposed to know something about defense…right?

RIGHT!

Here’s the ugly reality for Mark Stoops and the Kentucky Wildcats right now:

If Southern Miss can score 44 points on Kentucky then even some of the anemic offense in the SEC will be able to hang 30 points on the Wildcats this season and we have some news for fans of UK Football…

Kentucky will not be able to score 30+ points on offense in 2016 against SEC-level defenses…PERIOD!

Up next for Kentucky after that nothing less than…

A Total Freaking Disaster of a Loss to Southern Miss

At Florida

The reality is that the expectations are so low for Kentucky Football right now both inside and outside the Kentucky Athletic Department that Mark Stoops could probably get away with not getting to 6 wins in 2016 in his FOURTH year on the job, but we rather doubt that Mark Stoops could survive less than 5 wins this season even if his buyout is $10 Million Plus Dollars as has been reported in the Kentucky media.

With Florida, South Carolina, Alabama, Mississippi State, Georgia, Tennessee, and Louisville still left on Kentucky’s schedule and with that loss to Southern Miss there is the very REAL chance Kentucky wins FOUR or less games in 2016 and if that happens in Mark Stoops FOURTH season at UK then this is all very simple:

The Mark Stoops era at Kentucky is OVER….PERIOD!

ClayHelton27171771

5.  Clay Helton, USC – The first call from a USC-alum friend of ours came during the week of The Masters in April and that call went something like this….

“The USC Football program is in total disarray….I was just over there and it’s like no one is in charge of anything.”

Since then the calls from USC-alum friends our of the same vain kept coming and then in August we got a call from an USC-alum friend of ours that also happens to be a surgeon and who is thus busy as Hell who says on the phone…

“I think this season is going to be a Complete F-ing Disaster for USC!”

After the 52 – 6 Total Damn Debacle against Alabama when the USC Football Team basically…

Did Not Show Up in the Second Half of the game against Bama

….the “Complete F-ing Disaster” of a season is officially underway and up next for Clay Helton and the Trojans is Utah State in the Coliseum on Saturday and if the Trojans should lose this game at home with a road game against Stanford up next…

Clay Helton might not make it to the SIXTH game of the season against Colorado as the head coach of the Trojans!

One thing we know for Damn Sure…

It’s a Total Damn Embarrassment for USC and the Pac-12 Conference that in our opinion…

USC Football Gave-Up and QUIT against Alabama in the second-half on Saturday

…and if the Trojans QUIT and lose to Utah State on Saturday Clay Helton MUST be fired right after the game…PERIOD!

By the way….in Two-Plus Seasons at USC now…Clay Helton’s record after the loss to Alabama…

6 – 5!

KevinSumlin1818181

6.  Kevin Sumlin, Texas A&M – Kevin Sumlin must have seen his coaching career flash before his eyes in the fourth quarter against UCLA on Saturday because to lose to the Bruins in that way….meaning in letting UCLA come back and win the game after the Aggies were way up…would have been the WORST scenario for Sumlin who is flat-out right now on…

A Knife’s Edge relative to his job status in College Station

…and who cannot afford ANY train crashes in 2016, and with that in mind and with the win over the Bruins now in the books the only thing that matters now is somehow…someway for the Aggies to get to…

8-Plus Wins in 2016

…because ANYTHING less than 8-Plus Wins in 2016 for the Aggies and Kevin Sumlin’s head coaching career will come to screeching halt come December!

Let’s look at what A&M has left on their schedule:

Prairie View
At Auburn
Arkansas – Dallas
At South Carolina
Tennessee
At Alabama
New Mexico State
At Mississippi State
Ole Miss
Texas – San Antonio
LSU

Cupcakes81188

Well…Kevin Sumlin and his Aggies SHOULD be able to find 7 more wins in their last 11 games….with THREE Cupcakes on their plate…which means A&M only needs to go .500 in SEC play so…

There really are NO more excuses…right Kevin Sumlin?

RIGHT!

DarrellHazell18818

7.  Darrell Hazell, Purdue – The expectations for Purdue football are at such a low level now that Darrell Hazell could probably get away with win 4 or 5 wins in his FOURTH season on the job and get a FIFTH season which is…

So Damn Freaking Pitiful

….since we remember well the Joe Tiller years at Purdue BUT with that opening season win over Cupcake Eastern Kentucky the Boilermakers still have these teams to play in 2016…

Cincinnati
Nevada
At Maryland
At Illinois
Iowa
At Nebraska
Penn State
At Minnesota
Northwestern
Wisconsin
At Indiana

…and if Purdue can’t get to 4 or 5 wins with what they have left then Darrell Hazell SHOULD be fired but then if we were the AD at Purdue we would have told Hazell before the season something like…

“This is your fourth season at Purdue Darrell and it’s either six wins and a bowl or we are moving on to another coach in December. Now Good Luck to you Son.”

TimDerutyer2381818

8.  Tim DeRuyter, Fresno State – The way Fresno State has played the last few years we gave the Bulldogs little chance to beat Nebraska in Lincoln on Saturday and not surprisingly the Huskers won the game 43 – 10 which runs Tim DeRuyter’s record over the last THREE seasons at Fresno to…

9 – 18

…which is the kind of record that will get your ass fired at Fresno State and why in 2016 it’s either…

Six Wins Plus in 2016

…or the Tim DeRuyter-era at Fresno State will be over shortly after the Bulldogs last game against San Jose State on November 26.

Up next for Fresno State is Sacramento State which should be a WIN and then a critical road game at Tulsa which Tim DeRuyter and his Bulldogs will NEED to win with a lot of tough Mountain West Conference games still on their schedule.

ButchJones188181

9.  Butch Jones, Tennessee – The Pitiful Reality of Tennessee Football in Butch Jones FOURTH season on the job is that in the first game of the 2016 season at home against a team in Appalachian State which the Vols have at least FOUR to FIVE more times talent than….

The Tennessee Football Team was just NOT ready to play

…and having your team ready to play is the responsibility of the head coach Butch Jones and by all rights…

Appalachian State SHOULD have beaten Tennessee

…which would have put Butch Jones at the top of the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings even ahead of the…

Total Damn Disaster that is Les Miles in Baton Rouge!

BristolSpeedJones

Forget about the Battle of Bristol and the show that will accompany a football game being played at a NASCAR track because the TRUTH is…

Butch Jones is coaching the biggest game of his coaching career on Saturday against Virginia Tech

…because if Virginia Tech which won SIX games in 2016 and has a first-year head coach in Justin Fuente can beat Tennessee in Butch Jones FOURTH year on the job then…

What exactly is the point of Butch Jones being the head coach at Tennessee?

There is NONE is the answer to that question!

Forget about the game against Florida in Knoxville on September 24…because if Butch Jones and his Vols lose this game to Virginia Tech on Saturday….

The Entire Damn Vol Nation is going to IMPLODE and Butch Jones will be sitting on the Hottest Seat in America!

PaulHaynes91919100

10.  Paul Haynes, Kent State – With Kent State’s expected loss to Penn State in the opening game Paul Haynes record at Kent State now stands at:

Overall:  9 – 27

MAC:  6 – 17

Yes…those kind of records will get you fired at Kent State and before the Golden Flashes travel to play at Alabama on September 24 Paul Haynes and his football team REALLY need to win their next two games against…

North Carolina A&T
Monmouth

Good Luck Paul Haynes!

The Epic Damn Failure That Is the Pac-12 Network Continues To Drag Down the Pac-12 Conference and the Man Responsible for that Epic Damn Failure = Pac-12 Commish Larry Scott…Needs To Be Fired…TODAY! – #5 Hot Seat Head Coach on the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings = Darrell Hazell, Purdue Boilermakers

 

Before we get to the #5 College Football Head Coach on the current Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

Darrell Hazell, Purdue

…we must first address a simmering issue here in Pac-12 Country which is…

The Epic Damn Failure that is the Pac-12 Network!

Pac12Network1818811881

Consider this headline and story in the Seattle Times from the middle of March:

Washington State athletic department closes 2015 with $13 million budget deficit, Seattle Times

“Despite increasing ticket sales by almost $1 million and decreasing operating expenses by about three quarters of a million dollars, the Washington State athletic department closed its 2015 fiscal year with a deficit of more than $13 million.

This marks the second year in a row that the Cougars have incurred a $13 million deficit, but it actually fell from $13,714,442 in 2014 to $13,274,324 in 2015 – a difference of $440,118.

Athletic director Bill Moos addressed the deficit in a letter sent to WSU athletics donors Tuesday in which he highlighted that Cougars have the Pac-12’s second-lowest expense budget and spend about $12 million less than the conference average.

“Our revenues have increased significantly since 2010, and I believe WSU Athletics is positioned well to continue our upward trajectory in terms of revenue generation,” Moos wrote in the letter.

WSU took in $43,112,605 in operating revenue in 2015 – $314,212 less than the year before. This stems in part from a $400,901 decrease in contributions.

The Cougars also took in significantly less in Pac-12 Networks distribution revenue — $1.4 million – than they had hoped. WSU originally had projected the Pac-12 Networks’ distribution revenue at around $5 million or $6 million per school.

“We were being optimistic trying to compare it to the Big Ten Network, even though their footprint is significantly larger, because we own 100 percent of ours and they own 49 percent of their network,” Moos said in a conference call with reporters Tuesday. “They grew very fast, to almost $10 million per school. We were looking conservatively, by now, being at about $5 or $6 million. We thought that was fairly realistic.”

Still, things haven’t gone as well for the Pac-12 Networks as hoped, and the fact that the conference has yet to reach a deal with DirecTV remains a sticking point, and the subject of ongoing negotiations.”

Yep…the Pac-12 Network has left many Pac-12 schools which were anticipating and some would say were PROMISED that by now they would be receiving Millions of Dollars MORE in revenue now find themselves making a Helluva lot less than Big Ten and SEC schools primarily because….

The Epic Damn Failure that is the Pac-12 Network!

Samuel Chi writing at The Post Game summed up the Total Disaster that is the Pac-12 Network in a recent story with the headline…

Pac-12 Network Is Epic Failure, The Post Game

…and Chi goes on to write in the story…

“Pac-12 fans from the Pacific Northwest to the Rocky Mountains are hopping mad. March Madness is heating up but you wouldn’t know it if you live in Pac-12 country.

Among the power conferences (and we’re counting the Power 5 in football plus the Big East and American Athletic), the Pac-12’s tournament games will be the least visible — no matter where you live. Of the 11 conference games, eight are carried on the Pac-12 Network, including one of the semifinals, and the rest are on FS1.

By now you probably already know that compared to the Big Ten Network (BTN) and SEC Network, the Pac-12’s distribution both nationally and within the conference’s own footprint is abysmal. Whereas the BTN and SECN reach around 70 million households each around the country, the Pac-12 Network is only in 12 million homes.

If you don’t live in the six states where Pac-12 schools are located, there is little chance that you’ll see much of the conference tournament, which begins Wednesday. That probably includes the NCAA selection committee, which will be holed up in an Indianapolis hotel room this weekend.

But this gets better … er, worse. Even if you’re a Pac-12 fan with access to the Pac-12 Network, you’re still not going to get all the Pac-12 tournament games this week. Now in its fourth season of existence, the network has heavily regionalized its content. That means if you live in the Pacific Northwest, you will end up with some taped rerun of Washington-Washington State or Oregon-Oregon State instead of live USC-UCLA on Wednesday.

Yep, that’s right. Despite the fact that the Pac-12 has both national and regional feeds, most local carriers only provide access to the regional feed. That means in almost all cases, the fans only get to see live games involving teams in their region. If you’re a Stanford fan living in Phoenix, unless the Cardinal are playing Arizona or ASU, you’re out of luck.

This ludicrous programming model helps to explain why that while the BTN and SECN are bringing in close to $10 million annually for each conference school in the Big Ten and SEC, the Pac-12 Network is barely clearing $1 million per school (before expenses). The Pac-12 Network certainly isn’t picking up any new subscribers and is losing some of the few that it has.

And the future looks bleaker. The Pac-12 still does not have a distribution agreement with DirecTV, the biggest sports content provider nationally among cable/satellite carriers. DirecTV was bought last summer by AT&T, one of the Pac-12’s main business partners, and yet commissioner Larry Scott has so far failed to cut a deal — and there’s no end in sight.”

Hey Pac-12 Commissioner Larry Scott who is in Phoenix at this very moment meeting with official from Pac-12 Conference schools….

Got….The Epic Damn Failure that is the Pac-12 Network?

Why the Hell YES you do Son and why YOUR Sorry Ass Should Be Fired….

TODAY!

Pac12Map2818181

Memo to Pac-12 Conference Presidents and Athletic Directors Meeting In Phoenix Right Damn Now:

Larry Scott is NOT going to fix the Pac-12 Network because to fix the Pac-12 Network Larry Scott would have to admit his strategy of cutting deals with smaller satellite and cable operators and not DirecTV first was WRONG and torpedoed the Pac-12 Network from the very first Damn day and we must note in this spot that Larry Scott is a Harvard grad and thus Larry Scott is a…

Pompous Arrogant Ass that has NEVER been wrong during his Precious Life on this Earth

…and thus why if YOU Pac-12 Presidents and Athletic Directors want to fix the Pac-12 Network and if YOU give a Damn about the future of the Pac-12 Conference you need to…

Fire Larry Scott’s Ass….TODAY

….and hire someone that actually knows what the Hell he is doing like us here at Coaches Hot Seat that if hired tomorrow to run the Pac-12 Network would…

Find A Strong Cable and/or Network Partner to work with the Pac-12 Network

Get the Damn Pac-12 Network on DirecTV and every Damn other Major Cable and Satellite Operator in America!

Oh…but we actually have a Lick of Common Sense something Larry Scott does not have and NEVER will have since he is too Damn worried about his own Sorry Ivy League Ass and fretting over his public image….in our humble opinion of course!

This is all very Damn simple….the Pac-12 Conference has actually gone….

BACKWARDS

…since Larry Scott was hired as the commissioner of the Pac-12 in 2010 and things will only get worse in the future unless something is done like…TODAY…to get the Pac-12 Conference back-on-track beginning with the…

Firing of Larry Scott!

Frankly,,,there are LOTS of Pac-12 school alums at Coaches Hot Seat and we are just flat-out embarrassed at how far the Pac-12 Conference and Pac-12 Network has fallen behind the Big Ten and SEC Conferences and if the Presidents and Athletic Directors of the Pac-12 schools are willing to accept MEDIOCRITY then they are Sorry Damn Excuses for Leaders and are like Larry Scott a Damn Embarrassment to the great history and tradition of the Pac-12!

Geez…we could go on for awhile discussing this subject and there is a Helluva lot our lawyers will not let us write in this spot but alas it’s time to move on since we have said our peace…AGAIN….about the listing ship that is the Pac-12 Conference and with that we move to…

Darrell Hazell, Purdue Head Football Coach

DarrellHazell18818

4 th season at Purdue

Overall Head Coaching Record (Purdue + Kent State): 22 – 40

Purdue Overall Record: 6 – 30

Big Ten Record: 2 – 22

Here at Coaches Hot Seat we have two numbers for every FBS football program which we label…

Historical Win Number = The Number of Wins a FBS football program has generally won per season over the last 25 years

AND

Season Win Number = How Many Wins a FBS football program should win in upcoming season based upon the talent they have and the talent they should have IF they had a “decent” head football coach

When considering the Purdue football program we now have as the…

Historical Win Number

…pegged at…

6 Wins Per Season

….and for Purdue football in 2016 we have the….

Season Win Number

…pegged at…

6 Wins

…meaning that Purdue football in 2016 in his 4 th year coaching the Boilermakers SHOULD win…

6 Football Games!

So let’s see here….Darrell Hazell has won…

6 Football Games in 3 Seasons on the job

AND

2 Big Ten Games in 3 Seasons on the job

…which works out to averages of….

2 Wins Overall Per Season

AND

.67 Big Ten Wins Per Season

In the previous 16 seasons at Purdue under head coaches Danny Hope and Joe Tiller the Purdue football program averaged…

6.81 Wins Overall Per Season

AND

4.13 Big Ten Wins Per Season

Yes…by any measure we can think of…

Darrell Hazell has MASSIVELY underperformed as the head football coach at Purdue and everyone knows that anything less than 6….maybe 5 wins….and Darrell Hazell is DONE coaching the Boilermakers before we all go shopping for Christmas Trees in December!

Let’s go to Purdue’s 2016 Football Schedule and see what Darrell Hazell and his Boilermakers have to deal with in the upcoming season…

Eastern Kentucky
Cincinnati
Nevada
At Maryland
At Illinois
Iowa
At Nebraska
Penn State
At Minnesota
Northwestern
Wisconsin
At Indiana

Geez…that’s a pretty easy schedule with Purdue NOT having to play….

Michigan
Ohio State
Michigan State

…in Big Ten Conference play BUT the Boilermakers do open with Eastern Kentucky which lost at Kentucky in overtime in 2015 and needless to say a Purdue loss to the EKU Colonels in the opening game of the season would be nothing short of a…

Complete Freaking Disaster!

Based upon how Purdue football has played in the last three seasons under Darrell Hazell our guess is that…

Purdue would be LUCKY to win 4 Games in 2016

…and could very well…

Win 3 games or less again in 2016!

Our opinion….

Anything less than 5 wins and Darrell Hazell is fired come December and a pretty good head coaching job opens up which sits in the Big Ten West Division which in our opinion…

Purdue Football Should Be Competing For Every Year and Winning Every 5 Years or So

….but then we remember well the Joe Tiller days at Purdue so for Damn sure we know that…

Purdue Football CAN and SHOULD be able to compete with EVERY team in the Big Ten Conference!

PurdueFB818181

Next up on the Coaches Hot Seat Analysis…

Steve Addazio, Head Coach of the Boston College Eagles!

Post Week 3 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 1 – 10 Hot Seat Coaches – These Head Coaches Don’t Like To See the Man in Black but Give ‘em Hell anyway Johnny Cash!

 

Amazingly Week 3 of the college football season is already in the books and the HEAT is being turned-up on college head coaches who have stumbled out of the gate or in some cases NEVER got out of the gate and with that REALITY let’s get to the…

Post Week 3 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 1 – 10 Hot Seat Coaches

A chair on fire... metaphor "In The Hot Seat"

These head coaches don’t like to see the Man in Black but Give ‘em Hell anyway Johnny Cash!

PaulRhoads83883 (1)

1.  Paul Rhoads, Iowa State – With the Iowa State loss to Toledo on Saturday considering this stat for a second….

In Paul Rhoads last 30 games at Iowa State he has posted a record of:

7 – 23

In Paul Rhoads last 25 Big 12 games at Iowa State he has posted a record of:

4 – 21

Yep, that will land your ass on the No. 1 Hot Seat in the land and after a 1 – 2 start to the 2015 season the Cyclones get a week off before playing Kansas at home on October 3.

Iowa State can beat this Kansas team in the wake of the Complete Freaking Disaster left by that Dumbass Charlie Weis…right?

We sure the Hell hope so but how will Iowa State fare in its other 8 Big 12 conference games after they beat Kansas on October 3?

Hell if we know, but it looks like barring a Miracle in Corn Country Iowa State will be looking for a new head football coach come December!

2.  Doug Martin, New Mexico State – Doug Martin is in his third season at New Mexico State and with the Aggies overtime loss to UTEP on Saturday Martin has posted a record in three seasons at NMSU of….

4 – 23

Enough said on Doug Martin’s Hot Seat situation at New Mexico State!

DarrellHazell18818

3.  Darrell Hazell, Purdue – We here at Coaches Hot Seat fully expected Darrell Hazell’s Boilermakers to beat Virginia Tech at home on Saturday but instead the Hokies delivered a 51 – 24 beatdown of Purdue and now the 2015 season could turn into a Complete Freaking Disaster for Hazell with a very good Bowling Green team coming to town this coming Saturday.

A loss to Bowling Green and Purdue will start the season at…

1 – 3

…with 8 Big Ten games left to be played starting with a game at Michigan State on October 3 and for the life of us we believe if you can’t beat Virginia Tech or Bowling Green how in the Hell will Purdue win another game this season!

Oh, Darrell Hazell’s win/loss records in his third season at Purdue:

Overall:  5 – 22

Big Ten:  1 – 15

That’s BAD with a capital B!

MikeLondon271717

4.  Mike London, Virginia – After a few tense moments Mike London’s Virginia football team got its first win of the season over William & Mary on Saturday and now it’s back to Big Boy football in Week 4 with a game on Friday night against Boise State.

Now in his SIXTH season at Virginia Mike London has win/loss records on the board of…

Overall:  24 – 40

ACC:  11 – 29

…with ONE winning season out of FIVE and if UVA is going to post a winning season in 2015 we would recommend that they beat Boise State on Friday night!

By comparison the Virginia head coach that Mike London replaced and who was run out of Charlottesville on a rail…

Al Groh

AlGroh7777

…coached at UVA for NINE seasons posting FIVE winning seasons.

Yep…that reality will land your ass on the Hot Seat 100% of the time!

BretBielema188181

5.  Bret Bielema, Arkansas – A few years ago a handful of Coaches Hot Seat members were having dinner with one of their college physics professors and one asked the professor about the following Albert Einstein quote:

AlbertEinstine811188

CHS Member: “John…what did Einstein mean when he said…

“Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.”

College Physics Professor: “Ahhh…Albert…a very smart one he was. There is a scientific answer to what Einstein meant when he said, “Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one,” but remembering you boys’ grades in my class I will give you the layman’s answer!

Loud laughter at the table!

College Physics Professor: “What Einstein meant was that reality is nothing more and nothing less than how each of our brains perceives the world and the perceived reality for one person is often very different than the reality for almost everyone else on the Earth and thus one reality is very hard to define. In the end reality is just the perception created by the neurons firing off in each of our brains which human beings will naturally try to order towards their own individual particular world view.”

CHS Member: “So what you are saying is that reality…meaning a one reality for everyone no more exists than the Man on the Moon and that reality is different for each person based upon how their individual brain perceives the world?”

College Physics Professor: “Precisely, but then human beings because of their highly evolved brains look at the world around them and naturally want to order it, to organize it, to classify it, to put people and ideas into certain boxes, because that is what homo sapiens were forced to do over millions of years of evolution to survive and then thrive and with that you now not only understand what Einstein was saying but you can also grasp why perception plays such a huge role in daily human life. In the end we are what we perceive of the world, of other people, and of ourselves.”

Getting back to the Complete Freaking Disaster that is Bret Bielema’s REALITY right now after the Razorbacks loss to Texas Tech on Saturday the PERCEPTION at the end of the 2014 season was that Arkansas made some HUGE strides….but did they in FACT?

Let’s go Joe Friday and get to the FACTS on the State of Arkansas Football…Past…Present…and Future:

After a loss to Georgia on October 18, 2014 the Arkansas record stood at…

3 – 4

….and then the Razorbacks under Bret Bielema finished the season by doing this:

Beating UAB = No Big Whoop!

Losing to Mississippi State = Not Surprising

Beating a Collapsing LSU Team = No Big Whoop!

Beating a Demoralized Ole Miss Team =No Big Whoop!

Losing to Missouri = Not Surprising

Beating a Mediocre Texas Team in Bowl Game = No Big Whoop!

So the so-called BIG ending to the Razorbacks 2014 was in REALITY…

No Big Whoop!

…but the PERCEPTION was that Bret Bielema had “turned things around” at Arkansas when in REALITY nothing could be farther from the truth!

Let’s move ahead to the 2015 season for Arkansas which has started this way following an off-season of Bret Bielema and Arkansas AD Jeff Long telling anyone that would listen that Bielema was the second-coming of Paul “Bear” Bryant and that Ohio State was actually playing in something akin to the MAC instead of the Big Ten….in our opinion of course….

Beat UTEP = No Big Whoop!

Lost to Toledo = Hmmmm….Surprising….but NOT REALLY!

Lost to Texas Tech = Hmmmm…Even More Surprising…but NOT REALLY!

Oh, Bret Bielema’s record since supposedly things “turned around” at Arkansas after the loss to Georgia last season:

5 – 4

So the PERCEPTION until Toledo whipped Arkansas was that the Razorbacks were….BACK.…but the REALITY which is just now sinking into the heads of Arkansas fans who are thinking the Pig Farmer from Iowa might have pulled a fast one on them in the last year is that…

Arkansas is 1 – 2 and they play Texas A&M on Saturday in Dallas and the Aggies are….

6 Point Favorites!

Guess what?

If Arkansas loses to Texas A&M on Saturday with games at Tennessee and at Alabama on deck the REALITY is the Razorbacks could be sitting at…

1 – 5

….when Auburn comes to Fayetteville on October 24 in what could be the….

Ultimate Hot Seat vs. Hot Seat Coaching Match-Up with the Losing Coach being run out of town on the back of a hog!

Here’s the REALITY for Bret Bielema based upon the building PERCEPTION in Arkansas which we confirmed by talking to an Arkansas-alum friend of ours in Ft. Smith, Arkansas who could buy-and-sell everyone in the Fayetteville – Bentonville area except for the Walton clan and that REALITY is…

“If this season implodes both Bielema and AD Jeff Long might find themselves lucky to shoveling shit in West Texas as you boys like to say from time to time!”

Yep…that is the REALITY NOW in Arkansas folks!

KliffKingsbury271717

On another note per our agreement with Texas Tech head coach Kliff Kingsbury since the Red Raiders beat the Razorbacks we will no longer be calling Coach Kingsbury….

“_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _”

Nice win there in Fayetteville Kliff!

6.  Willie Taggart, South Florida – With the South Florida loss to Maryland on Saturday the Bulls dropped to…

1 – 2

…on the season and things don’t get any easier for Willie Taggart and his football team with this upcoming schedule:

Memphis
Syracuse
At UConn
SMU
At Navy
At East Carolina
Temple
Cincinnati
At UCF

Memo to Willie Taggart:  IF your South Florida team plays the rest of the season the way it has played its first three games in 2015…

You might not win another game until you play hapless UCF on November 26 and Hell Furman beat UCF so go ahead and put that win over the Black Knights on the board!

Get off your ass Willie Taggart! Signed: Coaches Hot Seat

GusMalzahn11818

7.  Gus Malzahn, Auburn – At the tail-end of the 2014 college football season we ran into an “old and former defensive coordinator in the SEC” at a restaurant in Atlanta and he said to us when the Auburn football program came up:

“The Gus Malzahn experiment in major college football is about to come to an end because what he and other coaches like Chip Kelly have been doing just cannot work unless they have an elite quarterback and neither Malzahn nor Kelly have that right now nor more than likely will they have that next season.”

We talked about the above statement for a few hours in the lobby of an Atlanta hotel and came to agreement on the idea that Malzahn and Kelly’s offenses depended on an elite quarterback who could make instant decisions on the fly but Auburn had Jeremy Johnson ready to play in 2015 and the Eagles had Nick Foles who wasn’t doing to bad at quarterback for the Eagles last season.

Guess what?

Jeremy Johnson is a Total Bust and Nick Foles is playing for the St. Louis Rams who was replaced by Sam Bradford who would be lucky to be a water boy on the Coaches Hot Seat Flag Football Team forget about playing QB and right now the…

Philadelphia Eagles

AND

Auburn Tigers

….are both a Complete Freaking Disaster!

Oh…another thing…neither the Philadelphia Eagles nor the Auburn Tigers are playing ANY defense so put that REALITY on top of everything else and truly….

Gus Malzahn is facing nothing short of what Gene Chizik faced in 2012 when Auburn went 3 – 9 and 0 – 8 in SEC play and was rightly run out of Auburn on a rail!

Let’s look at the rest of Auburn’s schedule with the Tigers now at 1 – 2 on the season realizing that…

Gus Malzahn is 2 – 6 in his last 8 games at Auburn

Guz Malzahn is 10 – 6 in his last 16 games at Auburn

Mississippi State
San Jose State
At Kentucky
At Arkansas
Ole Miss
At Texas A&M
Georgia
Idaho
Alabama

In our opinion if Auburn plays like they did against LSU the Tigers will be lucky to win…

3 Games in 2015

ANY SEC Games in 2015

What if Auburn finished at…

3 – 9 Overall

0 – 8 in the SEC

…in 2015 would Gus Malzahn be sent packing as Gene Chizik was sent packing only two seasons ago with the same record after winning a National Championship considering Malzahn didn’t win a National Title two seasons ago when he had the chance?

What’s Good for the Chizik is Good for the Malzahn….right?

RIGHT!

JayJacobs77217

Who would Auburn AD Jay Jacobs hire to replace the run out of Auburn Gus Malzahn to coach the Tigers into the future?

Well, based upon the amount of money Auburn has been spending to build a strong football program on The Plains does anyone doubt that Jacobs would fly down to Tallahassee and offer Jimbo Fisher $8 Million A Year…”Nick Saban Money”….to be the next head football coach at Auburn?

Would Jimbo Fisher accept an offer to become the Auburn head coach at $8 Million A Year?

Does it get HOT on The Plains of southwest Alabama in the Summer?

That would be a BIG YES!

Memo to Gus Malzahn:  Nice try against LSU to get the Auburn offense going with Jeremy Johnson but now Gus….Johnson would be lucky to be running the scout team for the Coaches Hot Seat Flag Football Team forget about being in the 1 – 5 QB slots so why in the Hell is he the starting QB at Auburn? Oh, what’s behind Johnson is even worse? OK…that makes sense!

Memo No. 2 to Gus Malzahn:  If you lose to Mississippi State on Saturday here is how you will know on whether to contact a Realtor or not to put your house on the market:

If Auburn AD Jay Jacobs starts saying things like…

“I am becoming very concerned in our fundamental approach to the game.”

…put the house on the market immediately!

CharlieStrong288118

8.  Charlie Strong, Texas – The most amazing thing about the Texas loss to California on Saturday wasn’t the missed extra point at the end of the game BUT that the Texas Longhorns…

YES the Freaking Texas Longhorns!

…had to come storming back to almost tie a team in the California Bears that over the past THREE football seasons had won NINE football games TOTAL!

That is the REALITY of how far the Texas football program has fallen since Mack Brown lost to Alabama in the 2009 – 2010 Bogus BCS National Title Game!

Since that loss to Alabama in the Rose Bowl in Pasadena in January 2010 Texas has posted a combined record under Mack Brown and Charlie Strong of….

37 – 30!

This is the Texas Longhorns we are talking about here and although we will readily admit there is No Joy in Coaches Hot Seat-Ville putting Charlie Strong on the Hot Seat who two Coaches Hot Seat members first met in the early 1990s when Charlie was on Steve Spurrier’s staff at Florida the TRUTH is Texas football right now is very simply…

A Complete Freaking Disaster

…and the sad REALITY is that if Oliver Luck had been the AD at Texas in 2013 instead of the Sorry Excuse for a Human Being Steve Patterson that right now…in our opinion….the head coach of the Texas Longhorns would be none other than…

Nick Saban

NickSaban818181

Guess what Texas fans….and this is just our opinion here at Coaches Hot Seat and is the FIRM opinion of the two Coaches Hot Seat members that traveled to Tuscaloosa for the Ole Miss – Alabama game on Saturday and who are still in Tuscaloosa on this early Monday morning…

If Texas is looking for a new head football coach in December Nick Saban would be Very Damn Interested in that job

….because unlike Alabama which is rebuilding job that is PAST DONE Texas is a Complete Freaking Disaster that needs a HERO to save it and again our opinion here at Coaches Hot Seat:

Nick Saban has ONE more Act in his life on this Earth which would be capped by winning….

National Titles at LSU, Alabama and Texas!

You heard it here first!

As for Charlie Strong whose Texas team is now at 1 – 2 on the season Big 12 Conference play begins this Saturday against Oklahoma State in Austin and to that we can only say…

Good Luck Charlie!

GeorgeOleary271717

9.  George O’Leary, UCF – The UCF loss to Furman on Saturday confirmed of what we saw of UCF when they played Stanford in Week 2…

UCF is average at best and hardly coached team at worst

….and we agree completely with the following from Victory Way: UCF Blog for the UCF Fans…

Time for George to go, Harry P. Nolan, Victory Way

Up next for the 0 – 3 UCF which is now hardly coached by George O’Leary in our opinion…

At South Carolina

….in a Hot Seat vs. Hot Seat Head Coaching Match-Up against the Ole’ Ball Coach!

Speaking of the Ole’ Ball Coach!

ALA @ USC

10.  Steve Spurrier, South Carolina – In the spring of this year a few Coaches Hot Seat members were up in South Carolina playing golf in the Greenville area and ran into some South Carolina Gamecock fans who were asked about the status of Steve Spurrier who will be FOREVER be known at Coaches Hot Seat as the…

Ole’ Ball Coach

…and one of those South Carolina fans said the following:

“I heard that Spurrier wanted to retire at the end of last season but that some folks got to him about all the other coaches that would be out of job if he retired and the Steve reluctantly decided to come back and coach in 2015 and see how things would turn out.”

Sorry….head coaches should not be staying in jobs to keep their assistant coaches and especially their sons employed and no matter what Steve Spurrier has done at South Carolina in the past in case the folks in South Carolina don’t know it the Gamecocks head coaching job is not something akin to the modern day Roman Empire or the USSR where the leaders get to hang around for as long as they want but instead South Carolina is in America and in America…

When you quit performing in your job…you get fired!

That’s how it is for most hard-working Americans making $50,000 or less a year and for Damn sure that is how it should be for football coaches making Millions of Dollars a year!

Steve Spurrier has no Damn “right” to stay as the head coach at South Carolina for as long as he wants but instead the people paying the bills….

The alums, boosters and fans of South Carolina

…will decide when Steve Spurrier will no longer be the head coach at USC unless of course the Ole’ Ball Coach decides first which based upon South Carolina’s remaining games in 2015 as detailed below will be the way this Shakespearean tragedy in Columbia will end later this year:

UCF
At Missouri
LSU
Vanderbilt
At Texas A&M
At Tennessee
Florida
The Citadel
Clemson

Anyone else thinking that the Ole’ Ball Coach and South Carolina will…

Win maybe….3 more games this season….before they play Clemson at home on November 28 in what will more than likely be the last game with the Ole’ Ball Coach on the sideline in his legendary playing and coaching career?

Anyone else thinking South Carolina will beat Clemson and send Steve Spurrier out a winner and that the next day Steve will be playing golf in Florida?

Thought so!

What is that monologue from William Shakespeare’s As You Like It, Act Two – Scene Seven, that for some reason fits in this spot when considering the playing and coaching career of the Great Steve Spurrier? Oh…here it is:

“All the world’s a stage,

And all the men and women merely players;
They have their exits and their entrances,
And one man in his time plays many parts,
His acts being seven ages. At first the infant,
Mewling and puking in the nurse’s arms.
Then, the whining school-boy with his satchel
And shining morning face, creeping like snail
Unwillingly to school. And then the lover,
Sighing like furnace, with a woeful ballad
Made to his mistress’ eyebrow. Then, a soldier,
Full of strange oaths, and bearded like the pard,
Jealous in honour, sudden, and quick in quarrel,
Seeking the bubble reputation
Even in the cannon’s mouth. And then, the justice,
In fair round belly, with a good capon lined,
With eyes severe, and beard of formal cut,
Full of wise saws, and modern instances,
And so he plays his part. The sixth age shifts
Into the lean and slippered pantaloon,
With spectacles on nose and pouch on side,
His youthful hose, well saved, a world too wide
For his shrunk shank, and his big manly voice,
Turning again toward childish treble, pipes
And whistles in his sound. Last scene of all,
That ends this strange eventful history,
Is second childishness and mere oblivion,

Sans teeth, sans eyes, sans taste, sans everything.”

ShakespeareSevenAges

Thank You Coach Spurrier…now have a Helluva Fun time in these last NINE football games Ole’ Ball Coach!

Post Week 3 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 11 – 30 Hot Seat Coaches Analysis coming soon!

Documentary – In Search of Shakespeare 1: A Time of Revolution from technology freak on Vimeo.

Post Week 2 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 1 – 10 Hot Seat Coaches – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Holy Hell Johnny Cash!

There are just a few reasons why a college football head coach will end up on the Hot Seat and by far the main reason a coach finds his ass on the Hot Seat is…

He did not win enough football games!

But…there are other reasons a college football head coach will end up on the Hot Seat and two of those reasons that we have had to account for in recent years have been…

1.  A Head Coach like Charlie Weis who in our opinion did not give a Damn about coaching the Kansas football team in the proper way which also makes Charlie Weis a Sorry Excuse for a Human Being….with that being the opinion of EVERY American here at Coaches Hot Seat

AND

2.  Coaching like a Scared Coward which is how four SEC head coaches coached their teams on Saturday….

Butch Jones, Tennessee
Bret Bielema, Arkansas
Steve Spurrier, South Carolina
Gus Malzhan, Auburn

….with three of the above COWARD COACHES now finding their precious and COWARDLY asses on the Hot Seat for their COWARDLY behavior because they lost their games and Auburn head coach Gus Malzhan now just one loss away from finding his ass on the Hot Seat with Auburn playing at LSU this coming Saturday! Besides coaching in a COWARDLY way which clearly in our opinion ALL FOUR of the above SEC head coaches did on Saturday what really pisses us off here at Coaches Hot Seat is when head coaches who have guaranteed contracts that will pay them Millions of Dollars whether they win or lose so they will never have to work a day the rest of their lives…

Still Coach like COWARDS!

It was just Shameful and a Disgrace to the American Republic forget about an embarrassment to the SEC that head coaches…

Butch Jones, Tennessee
Bret Bielema, Arkansas
Steve Spurrier, South Carolina
Gus Malzahn, Auburn

….were on Saturday…just so Damn SHAMEFUL!

We will get more into the COWARDLY behavior of head coaches….

Butch Jones, Tennessee
Bret Bielema, Arkansas
Steve Spurrier, South Carolina

…in the Post Week 2 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings Analysis BUT is it just us here at Coaches Hot Seat or is everyone else thinking the same thing?

PaulFinebaum11991

The Southeastern Conference reached its PEAK at the same time that Paul Finebaum was negotiating the contract for his book in New York City in the spring of 2013 for what eventually became this….

PaulFinebaum818181

….and after the past two college football seasons and especially this past weekend has become what historians will mark as the Beginning of the End of the SEC? Of course, anyone that knows Paul Finebaum knows that Paul has a stellar record of latching onto public figures just before they are sent off to prison so Finebaum signaling the end of the SEC with his Idiotic book would not only be the MOST right thing in the world it would make a Helluva lot of sense also!

A chair on fire... metaphor "In The Hot Seat"

Let’s bring out the Man in Black to…

Give These Hot Seat Coaches Holy Hell Johnny Cash!

Post Week 2 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 1 – 10 Hot Seat Coaches

PaulRhoads83883 (1)

1.  Paul Rhoads, Iowa State – Cyclones head coach Paul Rhoads is on a pretty bad run of late and the loss to Iowa over the weekend on Iowa State’s home field by a score of…

31 – 17

….didn’t help matters and just by comparison over Paul Rhoads last 26 games coaching ISU he has posted a record of….

6 – 20

…and the previous head coach at Iowa State Dan McCarney posted a record over his last 26 games at ISU of…

12 – 14

….and also by comparison puts the winning percentages of Rhoads and McCarney at…

.231 for Paul Rhoads in last 26 games at ISU

.462 for Dan McCarney in last 26 games at ISU

Sorry, but Paul Rhoads can be the nicest and hardest working guy in the world and by all accounts we have heard he is both BUT we caught some of the Iowa – Iowa State game on Saturday and to put it bluntly…..

Iowa State DOES NOT look like a very well coached football team right now…PERIOD.

Oh….up next for Iowa State…

At Toledo which just beat Arkansas in Fayetteville!

Good Luck with that Paul and here’s a tip…don’t complain this week like some kind of LOSER about Ohio State’s schedule when you have a team to get ready to play Toledo!

MikeLondon271717

2.  Mike London, Virginia – Mike London’s Virginia football team had Notre Dame right where they wanted the Irish on Saturday…

Up by a point with just a few minutes to play with the Irish starting QB out and a back-up QB in for Notre Dame that had hardly played at all in a meaningful live college football game

….and how exactly did Mike London’s Virginia team find a way to lose this time around?

By allowing that back-up QB that had next to no experience throw a ball to a receiver that was allowed to get behind a defensive back for some reason which ended up with a touchdown!

Geez…you really cannot make-up some of the stuff that has happened to Virginia football in recent years BUT this loss to Notre Dame takes the cake, the pie and every Damn dessert in the kitchen and with that loss London’s record at UVA dropped to…

Overall:  23 – 40

ACC:  11 – 29

…over the last six seasons which is bad from whatever direction one looks at those records.

Up next for Virginia…

William & Mary
Boise State
At Pitt

Our recommendation to Mike London = WIN all three of those games son!

3.  Doug Martin, New Mexico State – Oh, you thought it was a big deal that the Florida Gators beat New Mexico State 61 – 13 on Week 1?

Uhhhh….NOT….because Georgia State which had won ONE football game the last two seasons just beat New Mexico State on their home field!

This is Doug Martin’s third season as the head coach at New Mexico State and his record at NMSU now stands at:

Overall:  4 – 22

Enough said on the Hot Seat situation at NMSU!

DarrellHazell18818

4.  Darrell Hazell, Purdue – Darrell Hazell and the Purdue Boilermakers got their first win of the 2015 season over Indiana State on Saturday which means about as much as a grizzly bear crapping in the woods of Yellowstone National Park meaning it means NOTHING AT ALL!

The 2015 college football season begins again for Darrell Hazell and the Boilermakers on Saturday with Virginia Tech coming to town and this is a game in our opinion that….

Purdue Should Win

….IF Purdue plays with the same intensity that they played with against Marshall in Week 1.

In the “Just By Comparison” department Darrell Hazell has now been the head coach at Purdue for 26 games and his win/loss record stands at…

5 – 21

….and the coach he replaced at Purdue who was fired and run out-of-town posted a record in his first 26 games at Purdue of….

10 – 16

….which should tell everyone that is paying attention why exactly Darrell Hazell is on the Hot Seat!

5.  Derek Mason, Vanderbilt – Vanderbilt looked OK at times against Georgia on Saturday but in the end a loss to the Dawgs by a score of…

31 – 14

…..leaves Derek Mason’s win/loss record in his second season at Vandy now at….

3 – 11

…and let’s hope Mason’s record after this coming Saturday’s game against Austin Peay is…

4 – 11

….or Mason might not make it as head coach at Vandy to the Ole Miss game in Oxford on September 26!

Looking over the rest of Vanderbilt’s 2015 schedule…

Austin Peay
At Ole Miss
At Middle Tennessee
At South Carolina
Missouri
At Houston
At Florida
Kentucky
Texas A&M
At Tennessee

….if Vandy improves just a little bit more as the season progresses MAYBE the Commodores can win…

4 Games in 2015

….which would be an improvement by ONE win over 2014 and would give Mason one more year in Nashville to get Vandy back to their “James Franklin-years” winning ways and with that Derek Mason now has his goal for 2015….

4 Wins!

Coach ‘Em Up Derek!

KevinWilson77-393x530

6.  Kevin Wilson, Indiana – Kevin Wilson and the Indiana Hoosiers beat Florida International on Saturday by the score of 36 – 22 and when one considers that FIU had won….

6 Games

…the last three seasons combined Indiana beating FIU meant about as much as a wild pig finding an acorn in Alabama which means that win over FIU means NOTHING AT ALL!

Up next for Kevin Wilson and Indiana….a very tough Western Kentucky team that is very simply a…

CANNOT LOSE game for Kevin Wilson and the Hoosiers but especially a CANNOT LOSE game for Kevin Wilson!

7.  Paul Petrino, Idaho – In Week 2 Paul Petrino’s Idaho team lost to USC in Los Angeles by a score of…

59 – 9

….and with that loss Petrino’s win/loss record at Idaho now stands at….

2 – 23

…..which is a winning percentage of…

.080%

….and the last Idaho head coach Robb Akey got fired at Idaho after posting a winning percentage of…

.286%

…over 6 seasons and thus why Paul Petrino is clearly on the Hot Seat!

Up next for Idaho….

Wofford!

OK…this should be a WIN for sure for Paul Petrino and the Vandals!

RonTurner281818

8.  Ron Turner, Florida International – After seeing in person an average Stanford team made of balsa wood whip UCF on Saturday night we now understand how FIU beat UCF in Week 1 and thus it was no surprise to us that an average Indiana team beat FIU on Saturday.

FIU has won…

6 Games

…in three seasons under Ron Turner and FIU should get its SEVENTH win under Ron Turner on Saturday when they play

NC Central

….not that anyone here at Coaches Hot Seat has a Damn clue who in the Hell NC Central is!

We do know that Ron Turner’s ass is on the Hot Seat whether Dave Wannstedt of Fox Sports thinks Turner’s ass is on the Hot Seat or not!

Memo to Dave Wannstedt:  Ron Turner’s precious ass is on the Hot Seat and FIU beating UCF in Week 1 was No Damn Big Deal!

ButchJones188181

9.  Butch Jones, Tennessee – The two Coaches Hot Seat members that traveled to Knoxville on Saturday for the Oklahoma – Tennessee game saw the same thing that the other 100-plus Coaches Hot Seat members saw watching the Sooners – Vols game on TV and that was….

Tennessee head coach Butch Jones had the Sooners on the ropes for much of the game and if not for COACHING LIKE A COWARD and COACHING NOT TO LOSE the Vols could have delivered the knockout punch to Oklahoma many times in the game and when you COACH LIKE A COWARD your precious ass ends up on the Hot Seat and that is where Butch Jones finds his precious ass on this Monday morning!

Oh by the way….below are Butch Jones win/loss records at Tennessee which make a Helluva lot more sense now after seeing him COACH LIKE A COWARD in the Oklahoma game:

Overall:  13 – 14

SEC:  5 – 11

Sorry Butch Jones…we don’t give a Damn if you inherited a wreck of a football program from the combo of Lane Kiffin and Derek Dooley because IF you are going to the head coach at Tennessee and a head coach in the SEC you first and most importantly must…

NOT COACH LIKE A COWARD!

As Coaches Hot Seat members discussed the outcome of the Oklahoma – Tennessee game on Saturday night after watching a day of college football and that Badass Madison Bumgarner almost throw a perfect game against the San Diego Padres two things were mentioned the most about Butch Jones’ coaching performance against Oklahoma:

1.  Butch Jones COACHED LIKE A COWARD and in many ways COACHED SCARED against Oklahoma on Saturday

AND

2.  Butch Jones clearly DOES NOT trust his quarterback Joshua Dobbs because there were numerous instances in the first and second half of the game against the Sooners where Butch Jones and his new and OLD offensive coordinator could have unleashed Dobbs on OU and put the game out of reach of the Sooners BUT Butch Jones didn’t do that which brings to mind a quote from the Great Bill Walsh on quarterbacks that one of us heard Coach Walsh say a Helluva long time ago:

BillWalsh1717171

Bill Walsh:  “If you don’t trust your quarterback to make plays and decisions on the field then you don’t have a quarterback and you don’t have a leader. A head coach must prepare his starting quarterback to the best of his ability and then trust his quarterback on gameday. To do anything but that would lead me to believe that a team either has the wrong head coach or wrong quarterback….or both. A head coach must trust his quarterback because that trust is fundamental to playing winning football.”

YES….we miss Coach Walsh and YES there are dozens of college football head coaches across America that DO NOT TRUST their quarterback and SHAME on them for that idiocy!

Sorry Butch Jones BUT it was YOU that cost the Tennessee Vols that game against Oklahoma because very simply Butch Jones you…

COACHED LIKE A COWARD….PERIOD.

Up next for Tennessee…

Western Carolina

…which is a SURE win and then COWARD Butch Jones and the Vols play…

At Florida

…and we would recommend that Butch Jones NOT COACH LIKE A COWARD against the Florida Gators because if the Vols lose to the Gators again….

Your ass Butch Jones and thus YOU will find yourself on the Face of the Sun!

SunEarthOh!

 

BretBielema188181

10.  Bret Bielema, Arkansas – A few Coaches Hot Seat members had been watching a tape of the Toledo – Arkansas game on Sunday and after watching things for awhile someone said check the box score on the game for Arkansas and after doing that what about these numbers for the Hogs offense?

Arkansas ran the ball 31 times for 103 yards

Arkansas threw the ball 53 times completing 32 for 412 yards

What in the Freaking Hell Bret Bielema?

So the working theory in Fayetteville must be that Arkansas can run the ball against SEC West teams but not a team from the MAC Conference? Is that right Bret Bielema who seemed in the last week very Damn concerned about Ohio State’s schedule and not the Hogs opponent which just whipped your team’s ass in Little Rock Bret and landed your ass back on the Hot Seat in the process!

YES…like Butch Jones…Bret Bielema COACHED LIKE A COWARD on Saturday but it was a different kind of COWARDICE that Bielema brought out against the Toledo Rockets….it was COWARDICE plus STUPIDITY because if Arkansas had not panicked and had just ran the ball down Toledo’s throat instead of throwing the ball all over the lot they could have won by two touchdowns but instead like in Knoxville and in Columbia…

COWARDLY behavior by the head coach won the day

….and with that COWARDICE the SEC now has FIVE head coaches on the Hot Seat….

Derek Mason, Vanderbilt
Butch Jones, Tennessee
Bret Bielema, Arkansas
Steve Spurrier, South Carolina
Les Miles, LSU

….and if the COWARDLY coaching continues at least three of the above head coaches will NOT be coaching their teams in 2016!

OhioStateChamps111

Memo to Bret Bielema:  This week Bret focus on getting your football team ready to play against Texas Tech because in case you didn’t know it your win/loss records at Arkansas of…

Overall:  11 – 16

SEC:  2 – 14

….are NOT the records that should lead to a head coach popping-off about ANYTHING relative to other football teams around the country especially the Defending National Champions in Ohio State which BEAT Alabama in the Semi-Final Playoff Game in case you forgot Bret!

Oh….lose to Texas Tech Bielema and your ass will be like the Persian Gulf region the last time a dozen or so Coaches Hot Seat members were in it during the spring and summer of 1991 for Desert Storm which was….

Hotter than Hell!

cc: Jeff Long, Arkansas Athletic Director

10 College Football Head Coaches That CANNOT LOSE In Week 2 – Steely Dan Singing Deacon Blues – Bob Stoops and the “Hungry Meter” for College Football Head Coaches

We are introducing a new feature at Coaches Hot Seat for the 2015 football season and beyond…the….

10 College Football Head Coaches That CANNOT LOSE In Week “X”

…..and to introduce this feature we will use a song from the 1970s Super Band Steely Dan…

Deacon Blues

“They got a name for the winners in the world….I want a name when I lose…they call Alabama the Crimson Tide….call me Deacon Blues…Deacon Blues.”

Enjoy the GREAT Steely Dan singing Deacon Blues!

10 College Football Head Coaches That CANNOT LOSE In Week 2

KevinWilson77-393x530

1.  Kevin Wilson, Indiana vs. FIU – After the close 1-point win over FCS team Southern Illinois in Week 1 there is just no way in Hell that Kevin Wilson’s Hoosiers can lose to FIU at home this week because a loss in this spot to a pitiful team from South Florida…

No…not the Miami Hurricanes

…would send Wilson’s ass into a part of the Universe that is Hotter than our Sun and last time we checked the Sun is pretty Damn HOT!

PaulRhoads83883 (1)

2.  Paul Rhoads, Iowa State vs. Iowa – In Paul Rhoads last 25 games at Iowa State his Cyclones have posted the downright startling and depressing win/loss record of…

5 – 20

….and rightly so Paul Rhoads’ ass is now hotter than that coffee that some Idiot spilled on himself and sued McDonald’s about years ago and won BIG which we seem to recall was Pretty, Pretty Hot Coffee which means a loss in this spot to the Iowa Hawkeyes and fellow Hot Seat coach Kirk Ferentz would be nothing short of a…

Complete Freaking Disaster!

KirkFerentz1717171

3.  Kirk Ferentz, Iowa vs. Iowa State – Consider this in the Total Disaster that Iowa Football has become in recent years under the $4 Million Dollar Per Year Man Kirk Ferentz:

In Iowa’s last 40 games the $4 Million Dollar Per Year Man Kirk Ferentz has posted a win/loss record of…

20 – 20!

That’s right the University of Iowa….or rather the fans of Iowa Football and in many ways collectively college football fans across America that watch all of these college football games on TV have collectively paid Kirk Ferentz over the past four football seasons something on the order of….

$15 Million Dollars

….for 20 Stinking Wins which works out to the amazing number…

$750,000 Per Freaking Win!

Seriously…you CANNOT make this kind of stuff up and thus why Kirk Ferentz and his Iowa Hawkeyes CANNOT lose to Iowa State on Saturday because if they do the above number goes up to….

$800,000 Per Freaking Win!

Hell, if Kirk Ferentz keeps up this Mediocre Football at Iowa by the end of the 2015 college football season he could be getting paid something on the order of…

$1,000,000 Per Freaking Win!

…and that’s good money IF you can find people STUPID enough to pay that kind of money for MEDIOCRITY which Kirk Ferentz has found in the state of Iowa IN SPADES!

CharlieStrong288118

4.  Charlie Strong, Texas vs. Rice – Anyone that has read the Coaches Hot Seat Blog over the past EIGHT college football seasons knows that we have some good fishing and hunting buddies in the Austin, Texas area who are Texas grads and love showing us “City Boys” what life is like in the Republic of Texas while hunting and fishing and every so often we haul those “Texas Boys” up to Montana to show them what life is like when you really go into backcountry where the trout are large and the grizzly bears will eat your ass if you are not careful!

Getting back to the subject at hand which is….

The Rolling and Raging On Fire Wagon Train

WagonBurning

…that is now Texas football we asked our Austin fishing and hunting buddies what the temperature was down in Texas relative to Charlie Strong and Texas football and their replay was…

“Let’s just say that if Texas loses to Rice on Saturday night Charlie Strong’s house could be on the market and sold before the Horns play Cal the next Saturday!”

Uhhhhh….we would call that the temperature of some wings we used to eat at a chicken wing place in Jacksonville Beach, Florida when a few of us were serving in the US Navy that were the Hottest Damn Wings we have ever put in our mouths and the very simple one word name for those wings was:

“Chernobyl”

This is very simple….Charlie Strong and Texas CANNOT lose to Rice on Saturday night…PERIOD.

AlGolden711771

5.  Al Golden, Miami vs. FAU – If there is ONE coach in college football that knows he MUST produce in 2015 meaning win a Helluva lot of football games it is Miami’s head coach Al Golden and in Week 2 Golden and his Hurricanes play Florida Atlantic on Friday night and a loss in this spot with these SIX games up next…

Nebraska
At Cincinnati
At Florida State
Virginia Tech
At Clemson
At Duke

…would be nothing short of a Complete Freaking Disaster and send Al Golden’s ass onto the face of an O Class Star which in case you didn’t know…

OClassStar888

Is One Helluva Hot Place for your ass to be sitting on!

LesMiles811818

6.  Les Miles, LSU vs. Mississippi State – We don’t have any fishing and hunting buddies in the state of Louisiana but we have heard that if LSU loses to Mississippi State on Saturday night that Les Miles will not be traveling back to Baton Rouge with the LSU football team but will instead be taken immediately to Cape Kennedy in Florida where several influential LSU boosters have arranged to have Les Miles and his ass launched on a NASA rocket to…

Calvera the closest neutron star to Earth which is approximately 250 to 1000 light-years from Earth

Calvera28181

….which it will take The Mad Hatter several million years to reach and we have also heard that in order to really stick-it-to Les Miles during the entire trip to Calvera those LSU boosters have arranged it so Les Miles will be forced watch a continuous loop replay of the January 2011 BCS Title Game loss to Alabama which most agree was the…

Boringest College Football Game of All Time!

Memo to Les Miles:  Don’t Lose to Mississippi State!

NCAA Football: Wake Forest at Stanford

7.  David Shaw, Stanford vs. UCF – A few Coaches Hot Seat members were on a conference call this week with a “non-athletic related contact” of ours on the Stanford campus who keeps his ears to the ground for us on The Farm since we have to work for a living and cannot hang around the Stanford Athletic Complex and whip the football team into shape which this Stanford football team needs desperately and our “non-athletic related contact” at Stanford said something very Damn interesting on our weekly conference call:

“If Stanford loses to UCF on Saturday there is a very good chance that Stanford doesn’t win 6 games this season because of how fragile and weak this team is and how tough the remaining schedule is.”

Hmmmm….this Stanford football team is “fragile and weak?”

Yep…that was our opinion of the Stanford football team we saw in August on The Farm although our term of…

Balsa Wood Stanford Candy Asses

…for this the 2015 Stanford football team seems to be a little more on the nose to us!

Let’s look at Stanford’s remaining games in 2015

UCF
At USC
At Oregon State
Arizona
UCLA
Washington
At Washington State
At Colorado
Oregon
California
Notre Dame

Yep…if Stanford cannot beat UCF which just lost to FIU on their home field then…

There is NO WAY IN HELL that Stanford gets close to 6 wins this season which would further validate what we have seen happen in recent years that has turned the once Very Damn Tough Stanford Football Program into the…

Balsa Wood Stanford Candy Asses

…that will fold-up like a cheap tent bought from Wal-Mart if even the slightest gust of wind hits the campground on The Farm in this case!

StanfordFootballStad181881

YES….UCF is a CANNOT lose game for Stanford head coach David Shaw but then when the cake has already been mixed and baked there isn’t a Helluva lot that one can do to that cake once it is sitting on the counter of the kitchen!

MikeLeach171717

8.  Mike Leach, Washington State vs. Rutgers – With Washington State about to look down the pipe of NINE Pac-12 Conference Games that will ALL be very difficult wins for the Cougars if there is a game that Mike Leach and his WSU football team needs to win it is this Saturday’s game against Rutgers because a loss in this spot to fall to 0 – 2 on the season and it will next to impossible for Washington State to get to 6 wins in 2015 and that would make…

Three Out of Four Losing Seasons for Mike Leach at Washington State

YES…beating Rutgers is CRITICAL for Mike Leach and the Cougs!

Bob Stoops

9.  Bob Stoops, Oklahoma vs. Tennessee – There is no doubt in our minds that Oklahoma head coach Bob Stoops would like to get the Sooners back into the running for a National Championship before he is politely told that his services are no longer needed in Norman since being just a little better than average is eventually not going to cut it at OU even for Bob Stoops, BUT when you talk to people around Norman and we mean folks that have some insight….not total insight but some insight….into what is going on the feeling that used to pervade Oklahoma football under Stoops….

That Dammit We ARE Going To Win Big 12 Championships and National Titles or Die Trying

….just NO LONGER EXISTS in Norman and there in a nutshell is what is wrong with OU football.

We are always coming up with new ways to rank college football head coaches here at Coaches Hot Seat and one way we came up with this past Summer was the “Hungry Meter” meaning on a 1 to 10 scale how “Hungry” is EVERY college football head coach to win Games, Championships and National Titles either at his current school or a bigger school if a great job opportunity presented itself. We have been tossing around the idea of publishing our opinion on the “Hungry Level” for each college football head coach BUT it is such a subjective opinion based on admitted less-than-perfect information we have held it back….so far.…BUT we will tell you of what “Hungry Level” we have OU head coach Bob Stoops at on a 1 to 10 scale to win Games, Championships and a National Title with the Sooners which is of course just our opinion:

Bob Stoops was a “10” on the “Hungry Meter” from 2001 to 2008

Bob Stoops was a “9” on the “Hungry Meter” from 2009 to 2011

Bob Stoops was an “8” on the “Hungry Meter” from 2012 to 2014

Bob Stoops current rating on the “Hungry Meter” = 7.8

In our opinion here at Coaches Hot Seat ANY college football head coach who has a rating of less than “9.5” on the Coaches Hot Seat “Hungry Meter” in today’s incredibly Damn competitive college football landscape has NO DAMN CHANCE to win a Conference Championships and National Titles.

NeylandStadium

Two Coaches Hot Seat members will be traveling up from Atlanta to Knoxville on Saturday for the Oklahoma – Tennessee game and they will report back on what they see from Bob Stoops and the Sooners….and our guess is….OU loses to Tennessee and ends up with 7 or 8 wins on the season and Bob Stoops is DONE at Oklahoma come December either in reality meaning no longer the head coach at OU or just a coach going through the motions hauling down millions of dollars a year for “X” number of years into the future.

Just our opinion.

BrianKelly171717

10.  Brian Kelly, Notre Dame vs. Virginia – Of course both Brian Kelly and Virginia head coach Mike London BADLY need a win in this spot BUT this is a game that Brian Kelly CANNOT lose after the Week 1 crushing of the Hapless Texas Longhorns that are still the Texas Longhorns even though they are now Hapless with a Capital “H” under Charlie Strong! With Georgia Tech coming to South Bend a week from Saturday a loss in this spot will not only dash the hopes of Irish faithful all over the country but would set-up the biggest game of Brian Kelly’s career at Notre Dame because a loss to Virginia followed by a loss to the Yellow Jackets at home would more than likely be a irreversible stake into Kelly’s future unless the Irish ran the table the rest of the way and there CANNOT be a Human Being alive on the Earth that believes the Irish could pull that off!

Our guess….Notre Dame whips Virginia just as UCLA did in Week 1….BUT if the Irish flop-around and lose this game to the Cavaliers Brian Kelly might as well travel on down to Cape Kennedy and get on that rocket with Les Miles that is headed to the closest neutron star because South Bend will be a terrible place to be next week even if Kelly will have to watch along with Miles a continuous loop of the 2011 BCS Title Game between LSU and Alabama which thankfully for ALL college football games was So Damn Boring it gave us the College Football Playoff!

Launch of Atlas V GPS IIF-4 from Cape Canaveral AFS

Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 1 – 10 Hot Seat Coaches – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

If you don’t think time flies this is the NINTH college football season that Coaches Hot Seat will be…what exactly?

Throwing out our opinions from the peanut gallery on the job status of college and now NFL head coaches and generally being the all-around “Shit-Disturbers” that our wives love so much?

Yep…that’s about it and to think this entire Coaches Hot Seat “thing” started with seven guys sitting around a table in the bar the Balboa Café in the Marina section of San Francisco in the Fall of 2006 talking about how in the Hell they were going to get Walt Harris’ sorry ass fired as the head coach of the Stanford football team!

BalboaCafe818181

Hell, let’s end this trip down memory lane and get to the subject at hand which is what College Football Head Coaches are on the Hot Seat at the end of Week 1 of the 2015 College Football season! Geez…that felt very Damn good to type that out and with the memories of Week 1 dancing in the heads of Coaches Hot Seat members and college football fans everywhere let’s bring the Late Great Johnny Cash to get things rolling!

Give these Hot Seat Coaches Hell Mr. Cash!

Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Ranking

A chair on fire... metaphor "In The Hot Seat"

DarrellHazell18818

1.  Darrell Hazell, Purdue – No doubt…Purdue played very hard against a very good Marshall team on Sunday…BUT…is anyone going to argue that a coach in his third season coaching a Big Ten Conference football team…

Darrell Hazell – Purdue

…should lose to a Conference USA team even if that CUSA team is very well coached and a Top 50 team in the country?

NO….no one should argue that it was OK that Purdue lost to Marshall on Sunday with a head coach in his third year on the job and thus that is why Darrell Hazell now sits on the…

No. 1 Hot Seat!

Up next for Hazell and Purdue…

Indiana State

…and then Virginia Tech at home which is a game that in our opinion Purdue can and should win and in a few weeks and thus the Purdue Boilermakers should be….

2 – 1

….when they host Bowling Green on September 26.

Keep coaching these kids up Darrell!

KevinWilson77-393x530

2.  Kevin Wilson, Indiana – Really Kevin Wilson? Really?

In Kevin Wilson’s FIFTH season as the head coach of the Indiana Hoosiers football team IU was only able to beat FCB Southern Illinois at home by a score of…

48 – 47

….and that is a Southern Illinois team that put up a record of…

6 – 6

…in 2014!

Really Kevin Wilson?

Here’s the bad news for Kevin Wilson and Indiana…the rest of the Hoosiers non-conference slate after the close win over the Salukis:

FIU – Which just beat UCF

Western Kentucky – Which just beat Vanderbilt

At Wake Forest – Which isn’t that good BUT is sure the Hell better than Southern Illinois!

YES…Kevin Wilson’s head coaching career should be flashing before his eyes right now because it’s on the verge of extinction if the past continues into the future in Bloomington!

YES….we would heartedly recommend your Indiana team beat FIU on Saturday Kevin Wilson!

PaulRhoads83883 (1)

3.  Paul Rhoads, Iowa State – The good news is that Iowa State beat Northern Iowa by a score of 38 – 7 on Saturday and the bad news is that means about as much as…

A Pinto Bean rolling across the heartland of America right now!

PintoBeans181818

…which means the 2015 college football season actually begins for Paul Rhoads and Iowa State this coming Saturday in their home game against the Iowa Hawkeyes!

With both head coaches in Paul Rhoads and Kirk Ferentz coming into this game on the Hot Seat the Winning Coach will…

Have the HEAT turned down a bit

..and the Losing Coach can be assured…

His ass will be lit-up like prairie of corn on fire in the Iowa heartland!

Anyone else ever seen a prairie of corn on fire in the Iowa heartland?

PrarieFire171717

It isn’t a pretty sight at all and thus why we recommend to BOTH Paul Rhoads and Kirk Ferentz they BOTH win this game which when one thinks about it pretty much assures that either Rhoads or Ferentz’s…

Ass will be lit-up like prairie of corn on fire in the Iowa heartland!

….come next Monday morning!

Oh…Paul Rhoads record against Iowa in six seasons at Iowa State is…

2 – 4

…which is a winning percentage of .333% which is not all that different than Rhoads overall winning percentage coaching the Cyclones which now sit at .395%!

4.  Doug Martin, New Mexico State – Score from Saturday’s game:

Florida – 61
NMSU – 13

Doug Martin’s record at New Mexico State:

4 – 21

Uhhhhh…that equals Hot Seat!

Enough said on New Mexico State!

MikeLondon271717

5.  Mike London, Virginia – In the South when Southerners are really feeling sorry for your ass but in reality they really don’t give a Damn about your predicament they will say something like….

“Well, just bless your heart.”

We are not going to say…

“Well, just bless your heart.”

…to Virginia head coach Mike London after his Cavaliers got blasted 34 – 16 by UCLA on Saturday because we truly would like to see Mike London succeed at UVA but then how can anyone look at the following records for Mike and not put London’s ass on the Hot Seat?

Overall:  23 – 29
ACC:  11 – 29

If the above continues in 2015 and thus can keep someone employed at the University of Virginia we will be applying to UVA soon for a job because you evidently can fail like a Sorry Son of a Bitch and make Millions of Dollars a year at the school that Thomas Jefferson founded!

Oh..up next for Virginia….

Notre Dame at home!

“Well, just bless Mike London’s heart,” Notre Dame fans around America are now saying in unison!

6.  Trent Miles, Georgia State – Score from Saturday’s game:

Charlotte – 23
Georgia State – 20

Trent Miles record at Georgia State:

1 – 24

Uhhhhh…that equals Hot Seat!

Enough said on Georgia State!

7.  Todd Monken, Southern Miss – Southern Miss played a decent game against Mississippi State for about a half BUT we nor anyone else with a working brain gave Todd Monken and his Golden Eagles much of a chance to beat the Bulldogs which means there is yet another loss on the board and that leave Monken’s records in his third season on the job in Hattiesburg at…

Overall:  4 – 21

Conference:  2 – 14

YES…Larry Fedora did win 12 games in the 2011 season at Southern Miss and now over the last three seasons plus Southern Miss has won….

4 Football Games!

Shocking…just Damn Shocking!

CharlieStrong288118

8.  Charlie Strong, Texas – It’s one thing in your second year on the job at Texas to take your football team to South Bend, Indiana and lose to Notre Dame.

There is no shame in losing to Notre Dame after all BUT in Charlie Strong’s second year on the job at Texas Strong took his Longhorns to South Bend and lost…

38 – 3

….in a performance where…

The Texas Offense did not exist

The Texas Defense did not exist

The Texas Special Teams barely existed

…which makes us wonder here at Coaches Hot Seat:

Just what in the Hell has Charlie Strong and his football coaches been doing since the end of the 2014 football season?

The answer to that question is evidently NOTHING AT ALL!

On top of that Texas has a QB that would be lucky to run SIXTH string on the Coaches Hot Seat Flag-Football team who from where we sit has NO DAMN ABILITY to lead anyone to do anything which really makes us wonder what exactly is going on at Texas right now because it may be the case that…

Charlie Strong and the Texas assistant football coaches…

Don’t Have A Freaking Clue!

Now at 0 – 1 here is what Texas has left on the schedule in 2015:

Rice
California
Oklahoma State
At TCU
Oklahoma
Kansas State
At Iowa State
Kansas
At West Virginia
Texas Tech
At Baylor

Hell…there is a REAL chance that Texas….YES Texas…IF the Longhorns play like they did against Notre Dame will…

NOT win another football game in 2015!

Memo to Charlie Strong:  If your Texas football team loses to Rice and California and you then lose to Oklahoma State, TCU and Oklahoma you will be fired before the Iowa State game so here’s a thought for you Charlie…

We would recommend your football team actually show-up against a Rice team that checking the Owls roster does not have ONE player on their team that Texas recruited!

YES…this Saturday’s game against Rice at home in Austin is the BIGGEST game of Charlie Strong’s coaching career because with a loss in this spot to the Owls it will only be a matter of WHEN and not IF Charlie Strong will be fired in Austin so we would recommend someone on the Texas coaching staff get the attention of the Texas football players before Saturday!

AlGolden711771

9.  Al Golden, Miami – Al Golden and Miami did what they had to do in Week 1 and beat Bethune-Cookman by a score of 45 – 0 and now the 2015 college football season begins for Al Golden and Miami with a trip to play FAU in Boca Raton in a game that Al Golden and Miami…

CANNOT LOSE!

Lose to FAU with Nebraska and a game at Cincinnati left on the non-conference schedule before starting ACC play at Florida State and Al Golden will be in a Helluva HOT spot for the rest of the 2015 college football season!

10.  Derek Mason, Vanderbilt – In a home game against Western Kentucky that Derek Mason and Vanderbilt HAD TO WIN the Commodores lost to WKU and now Derek Mason is really in a Helluva spot with Georgia coming to Nashville this Saturday. We will say that Vanderbilt looked better on defense and better on offense against Western Kentucky than in the 2014 season BUT the margin for error is very small for Derek Mason and he will probably need 4 or maybe 5 wins to return for the 2016 season and with that let’s take a look at what Vanderbilt has left on the schedule in 2015:

Georgia
Austin Peay
At Ole Miss
At Middle Tennessee
At South Carolina
Missouri
At Houston
At Florida
Kentucky
Texas A&M
At Tennessee

Geez….can Derek Mason and Vanderbilt really find four or maybe five wins playing the above remaining games?

We would be STUNNED if Vanderbilt wins four or five games in 2015 is our answer to that question!

11 – 30 Post Week 1 Hot Seat Coaches Analysis Coming Soon!