Tag Archive: Kliff Kingsbury

2018 Post Week 2 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – Thank You Johnny Cash!

Harry September 10, 2018 0 Comments

We are off to a great start to the 2018 college football season which has about fifty good storylines going including football coaches suddenly finding their ass on the Hot Seat for the first time in their coaching careers and with that in mind let’s bring out the Great Johnny Cash to get to this weeks Top 10 College Head Coaches on the Hot Seat after Week 2!

Thank You As Always Johnny Cash!

2018 Post Week 2 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

1. Urban Meyer, Ohio State – Ohio State had looked great in destroying Oregon State and Rutgers to open the 2018 season….2 Cupcakes for sure but still the Buckeyes are playing some very efficient football even with their head coach on the sideline. Urban Meyer will miss a third game this week in Ft. Worth against TCU in a match-up that has not only attracted College Gameday but also the Vegas Boys have made OSU 13-point favorites on the road against the Horned Frogs.

Ohio State easily has double the talent of TCU and should easily win this game…if they play turnover free football and that is where Gary Patterson and his football team comes in which should be ready to give the Buckeyes a good football game that will no doubt be killing Urban Meyer wherever he will be watching it…if he will be able to watch it that is!

Knowing how much missing on coaching in the OSU – TCU game is appropriate penance for Meyer and should be a tremendous less for Urban and other coaches to remind them that they should pay close attention to the make-up of their coaching staffs and support personnel and when they spot a Self-Consumed Punk they should think hard and long about the inherent risks in keeping that Self-Consumed Punk around their football program and university!

We will go Ohio State beats TCU by ten points in a great football game!

2. Larry Fedora, North Carolina – Counting the loss to end the 2016 regular season to NC State and the Sun Bowl of the same year that a few at Coaches Hot Seat were at to see the Tar Heels lose to Stanford Larry Fedora is sitting on a record of….

3 – 13

…in UNC’s last 16 games and now coming on the heels of a 22 point loss to an East Carolina team that has been as bad as UNC the last few seasons we have a full-bodied Code Red Total Disaster on our hands in Chapel Hill!

Now at 0 – 2 UNC has left to play in 2018…

UCF
Pitt
At Miami
Virginia Tech
At Syracuse
At Virginia
Georgia Tech
At Duke
Western Carolina
NC State

Unless Larry Fedora can rally the Tar Heels that looks like a 3 or 4 win season coming off a 3 – 9 record in 2017 and that record would lead to a Helluva coaching job that a Helluva Lot of football coaches would love to have opening up in early December!

3. Willie Taggart, Florida State – We are not quite sure what Willie Taggart and his FSU coaching staff have been doing since they took over the Seminoles in January but for Damn sure….

They have not been coaching this football team

….because there is not a player on the Samford football team that could be on the 4-deep at FSU and yet….Samford had Florida State on the ropes into the 4 th quarter in Tallahassee which would have been the…

Beginning of the End of the Willie Taggart Regime at FSU

….and from talking to a few FSU alums on Sunday including one we have known since the late 1980s….

If Willie Taggart doesn’t get this Total Disaster turned around at FSU he will not be the head coach of the Seminoles in 2019!

The Florida State coaches could just roll the balls out on the field and go to a local bar in Tallahassee and let the players practice themselves and there’s plenty of talent to win….

6 Games A Year

…but when you look at the rest of the now 1 – 1 Florida State schedule we are beginning to wonder if the Seminoles will win another game in 2018!

At Syracuse
Northern Illinois
At Louisville
At Miami
Wake Forest
Clemson
At NC State
At Notre Dame
Boston College
Florida

Geez….if FSU plays the way it did against Virginia Tech and Samford they will NOT win another game this season and when we asked our FSU-alum buddy what would happen if the Seminoles ended the season at 1 – 11 he says….

“They won’t sell 1,000 seasons tickets for the 2019 season if Taggart is still the coach. Hell…if they win less than 6 games I am done with FSU football until they fix that Damn mess in Tallahassee which includes ousting several people that hold tremendous power in the booster organization that are just worthless as Hell!”

Like Chapel Hill…we have a Code Red Total Disaster going on in Tallahassee and Willie Taggart just better Damn find a way to beat Syracuse on Saturday or there will be about 15,000 people at the Northern Illinois game the next Saturday in Tallahassee!

4. Kalani Sitake, BYU – BYU played pretty good against a decent California team on Saturday losing 21 – 18 and now the 1 – 1 Cougars need to regroup quickly because they have a trip to play Wisconsin in Madison which looks like a Badgers team that can be beat if UW is not focused and what a win it would be if BYU could go on the road and beat the Badgers…but come now…that’s big IF!

Basically when you get right down to brass tacks this is about BYU getting to 6 wins in 2018 which would give head coach Sitake the ability to say that the team improved over the 4 – 9 record last season and with that in mind the 1 – 1 Cougars have left in 2018….

At Wisconsin
McNeese
At Washington
Utah State
Hawaii
Northern Illinois
At Boise State
At UMass
New Mexico State
At Utah

We see 2 easy wins on that schedule….McNeese and New Mexico State at home….that’s 3 wins….which means BYU will need to beat…

Utah State
Hawaii
Northern Illinois

…at home and then to get to 7 wins beat UMass on the road and in our minds…that is very doable although an Utah State team that can score a lot of points will not be an easy win nor will Hawaii or Northern Illinois!

Good Luck in Madison Cougars!

5. David Beaty, Kansas – Congrats to David Beaty and Kansas for getting a nice road win at Central Michigan on Saturday which is a Big 12 team beating a MAC team which should be a forgone conclusion….but come now…this is Kansas we are talking about here and it’s back to reality in Week 3 for the Jayhawks with Non-Big Ten Powerhouse Rutgers coming to Lawrence which is a….

Very Winnable Football Game

…since Rutgers just got blasted by 49 points by the Buckeyes!

How many games will Kansas win in 2018 with these games left to play?

Rutgers
At Baylor
Oklahoma State
At West Virginia
At Texas Tech
TCU
Iowa State
At Kansas State
At Oklahoma
Texas

Our guess….1 more game to finish at 2 – 10 on the season!

6. Kevin Sumlin, Arizona – We originally put Kevin Sumlin on the Hot Seat this past offseason when he banned the media from covering Spring practice which is an uniquely Stupid Thing for a new head football coach to do and we fully expected after early wins over BYU at home and Houston the road Sumlin would be off the Hot Seat but now….BUT Arizona looks like a football team that has gotten….

No Coaching At All

…over the last 8 months and there’s a real chance that an Arizona team loaded with plenty of talent to win 8 games will not even get 6 wins in 2018 with these games still left to play on the schedule:

Southern Utah
At Oregon State
USC
California
At Utah
At UCLA
Oregon
Colorado
At Washington State
Arizona State

Hell….Arizona will be LUCKY to win 4 games in 2018 if they play like they did against BYU and Houston to open the season which is…

Undisciplined
Unfocused
Un-Everything

…and in the end really….Un-Coached!

There’s an old rule of thumb about hiring someone for a challenging job:

Don’t hire someone to do a challenging job that just got run from their last job that saw them get paid Millions of Dollars because in our opinion that person is not going to be motivated to do that new challenging job because….they have Millions of Dollars in the bank!

Let’s see if that rule of thumb proves true and Arizona turns into a Code Red Total Disaster which it’s right on the brink of right now!

7. Dan Mullen, Florida – In all his time at Mississippi State new Florida head coach Dan Mullen flirted with the Hot Seat a few times BUT he was able to stay off the Hot Seat because our expectations for Mississippi State are a Helluva Lot Lower than our expectations for Florida and our first expectation for Florida is….

Your Ass Better Not Lose To Kentucky Especially At Home!

That was just a Freaking Damn Embarrassment the way the Florida Gators played against Kentucky at home running out a quarterback that would not start for thousands of high school teams across the country and a football team that not only….

Did Not Look Prepared To Play Football

…they also…

Did Not Look Very Damn Motivated

…and when we see that at…

FLORIDA

….your ass goes right on the Hot Seat!

Let’s see what the 1 – 1 Gators have left in 2018 to see just what kind of Damn Disaster we are dealing with here >

Colorado State
At Tennessee
At Mississippi State
LSU
At Vanderbilt
Georgia – Jacksonville
Missouri
South Carolina
Idaho
At Florida State

Geez…if the Gators beat Colorado State and Idaho that is 3 wins….and Hell Samford can also beat FSU in Tallahassee so that might be a win which makes 4 wins….but where in the Hell is Florida going to find even 2 more wins to get to 6 on the year?

Got Dan Mullen’s ass is now on the Hot Seat and may never get off until he gets fired at Florida?

Yep!

Keep that potential next head coaches for the Gators list handy there Florida AD Scott Stricklin because you might need it Son!

8. Kliff Kingsbury, Texas Tech – Texas Tech destroyed Lamar on Saturday but come now….Lamar is a Damn Joke Cupcake and now it’s back to Big Boy Football with Houston coming to Lubbock in game that Kliff Kingsbury just…

Flat-Out Cannot Lose

…because a loss in this spot to drop to 1 – 2 with these games still left….

At Oklahoma State
West Virginia
At TCU
Kansas
At Iowa State
Oklahoma
Texas
At Kansas State
Baylor

….will be 4 or 5 wins tops and there’s not a chance in Hell Kingsbury can survive less than 6 wins in 2018 to return for 2019!

Our guess if Tech loses to Houston Saturday they finish with a record of…

3 – 9

….and Texas Tech which is a decent job will open up by December 1.

9. Jim Harbaugh, Michigan – Michigan destroyed a mediocre Western Michigan team on Saturday and now comes another team in SMU that Blue should destroy in Ann Arbor to at least get this ball rolling a little and assuming Blue beats the Mustangs….

And They Better Damn Beat Em or Jim Harbaugh is Headed for a Code Red Total Disaster

…what is left on the schedule isn’t exactly easy…

Nebraska
At Northwestern
Maryland
Wisconsin
At Michigan State
Penn State
At Rutgers
Indiana
At Ohio State

Michigan has plenty of talent and a good enough of a defense to be AT WORST….

9 – 2

…when they head to Columbus on November 24 to play Ohio State and that’s the standard we are setting for Jimmy Harbaugh this season….

1 more loss between now and the Buckeyes

…and that loss better Damn not be to SMU on Saturday Jimmy or your ass will be on…

Face of the Sun Hot Seat!

10. Lovie Smith, Illinois – Lovie Smith’s Illini opened up the 2018 season with wins over Big-Time Cupcakes….

Kent State
Western Illinois

….and now it’s back to the Real World with USF coming to town on Saturday and then these games to finish the season:

Penn State
At Rutgers
Purdue
At Wisconsin
At Maryland
Minnesota
At Nebraska
Iowa
At Northwestern

Illinois is now 2 – 0 and our guess…they finish the season at…

4 – 8

…which would mean Lovie Smith has put up records of….

3 – 9
2 – 10
4 – 8

Overall: 9 – 27

Would that keep Lovie Smith employed for another year at Illinois?

How the Hell could it?

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Arizona, BYU, Coaches Hot Seat, Coaches Hot Seat Rankings, Dan Mullen, David Beaty, Florida, Illinois, Jim Harbaugh, Kalani Sitake, Kansas, Kevin Sumlin, Kliff Kingsbury, Larry Fedora, Lovie Smith, Michigan, North Carolina, Ohio State, Texas Tech, Urban Meyer, USF, Willie Taggart

2018 Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Ranking – Let’s Bring Out The Great Johnny Cash To Get Things Rolling! Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny!

Harry September 6, 2018 0 Comments

Time does fly and the 2018 College Football Season marks the 12 th year of the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings and recently a Coaches Hot Seat member said…

“We cranked this thing up in 2007 when Saban got to Alabama and Hell we might as well keep it going for as long as Nick is still alive and working for a living in Tuscaloosa!”

Amen and that should be thru the 2022 season…right Nick?

Let’s bring out the Great Johnny Cash to get things rolling! Give these Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny!

Thank You Mr. Cash!

2018 Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Ranking

1. Urban Meyer, Ohio State – When the story about Zach Smith broke at Ohio State several weeks back we called a long-time friend of ours in Columbus and asked him what he thought of Smith and his opinion and what he said to us was:

“He’s a punk.”

We asked: “Would you like to expand on that?”

“Nope….just…he’s a punk.”

After watching the ESPN interview with Zach Smith we had the same exact opinion and whatever happened between Smith and his wife in what seems like a very bitter marriage on both sides when you read the report that Ohio State produced on the Zach Smith – Urban Meyer situation we could not help but wonder how Meyer kept his job keeping such a Sorry Excuse for a Human Being on his staff for so long not only risking his own job but the entire Ohio State football program for….”a punk!”

The entire story just makes no freaking sense even if you understand Smith is Earle Bruce’s grandson because where we come from the children of legends are held to a higher standard not a lower one and with that in mind and realizing what went on at Florida under Urban Meyer there is still a chance something else could come out on this entire Smith + Meyer issue in the coming weeks and all it would take is one piece of information to confirm that years ago Meyer also knew Smith was a “punk” and kept him on staff….and maybe for an interesting reason.

Who knows and we shall see about all that so Urban Meyer enters the 2018 College Football Season on the #1 Hot Seat and we will hold him to the same standard as any other coach which includes not only how his football team plays on the field but how the coach runs the football program and manages himself…and his coaches!

After the win over hapless Oregon State the Buckeyes have left in 2018:

Rutgers – without Meyer
TCU – without Meyer
Tulane
At Penn State
Indiana
Minnesota
At Purdue
Nebraska
At Michigan State
At Maryland
Michigan

Only Alabama has more talent on their roster than Ohio State and without the entire Smith – Meyer self-inflicted disaster we would guess 12 – 0 for the Buckeyes in 2018…with the Smith – Meyer self-inflicted disaster our guess for OSU in 2018 >

10 – 2

2. David Beaty, Kansas – It’s just impossible to explain why now fired Kansas AD Sheahon Zenger’s hired Charlie Weis and David Beaty to coach the Kansas football team unless Zenger is Mentally Insane or a Damn Moron or he just….

Doesn’t Know A Damn Thing About The Game Of Football

…and our guess it was a combination of the last 2 on why he hired Weis and Beaty when there were at least 20 coaches that would have been Home Run hires for the Jayhawks many of which didn’t even get a call!

In 4 seasons at Kansas David Beaty has posted records of…

Overall: 3 – 34

Big 12: 1 – 26

…and those 3 wins are over:

Rhode Island
Texas
SE Missouri State

Add to this tale of horrors the opening season loss to Nicholls in 2018 and we don’t think there’s a chance in Hell that Kansas wins a game this season with these games left to play:

At Central Michigan
Rutgers
At Baylor
Oklahoma State
At West Virginia
At Texas Tech
TCU
Iowa State
At Kansas State
At Oklahoma
Texas

NOPE….Kansas will be 0 – 12 in 2018 and will be hiring a new head football coach come December and we can think of 10+ coaches that would be GREAT hires at the school and we have to think new KU AD Jeff Long will look at few of them but will Jeff hire someone who can bring some much needed energy and offensive fire-power to Lawrence?

Maybe…Jeff Long is not an Idiot…far from it…but he did hire Bielema at Arkansas when he could have had the better version of Bobby Petrino in Jeff Brohm so maybe Long will make a hiring mistake at a place that has had a Helluva Lot of hiring mistakes in the last 40 years!

3. Kliff Kingsbury, Texas Tech – The train wreck that is now Texas football is partially responsible for the Total Disaster in Lubbock which keeps rolling down the tracks because Tom Herman’s Horns let Kingsbury and Tech come into Austin in the last regular season game of 2017 and beat Texas which got the Red Raiders to 6 wins….not that 6 wins in your FIFTH season on the job should let Kingsbury keep his job…but it did and the….

Total Disaster in Lubbock Train Keeps-A-Rolling In Lubbock!

Mike Leach and Tommy Tuberville were the two head coaches at Texas Tech before Kingsbury got to Lubbock and below are their average wins per season numbers at Tech:

Mike Leach: 8.4

Tommy Tuberville: 6.67

Kliff Kingsbury has averaged….

6 wins per season

…and if that can keep you employed in Lubbock….Geez….that’s a low and embarrassing bar for football at Texas Tech!

Now at 0 – 1 Texas Tech has left on its schedule in 2018:

Lamar
Houston
At Oklahoma State
West Virginia
At TCU
Kansas
At Iowa State
Oklahoma
Texas
At Kansas State
Baylor

That looks like 3 – 9 or 4 – 8 to us and a pretty good job in Texas Tech opening up in early December at the latest!

4. Jim Harbaugh, Michigan – Many of us got to see Jim Harbaugh up close and personal when he was coaching Stanford and even the San Francisco 49ers but we haven’t had the ability to know what exactly has been going on at Michigan since Jimmy took the job in 2015. That changed earlier this year when a good friend of ours took a job at the University of Michigan that we have known for 20+ years, and he has for the last several months been feeding us lots of interesting information on what has been going on with Michigan Football and its information we can use because this guy knows the game of football.

Before we get to what our good friend has been telling us about Jimmy and Blue for the last several months we must be upfront and honest and say…

We like Jim Harbaugh and want him to succeed at Michigan

….and although we didn’t agree with some of the things he did with the 49ers like benching Alex Smith for Colin Kaepernick or letting Aldon Smith off easy after several incidents including a DUI which just made Smith’s life worse as anyone paying attention can see we can start anew and we did start anew when Jim took the Michigan job and we have pulled for him and his team in every game.

With the loss to Notre Dame Jim Harbaugh has now coached 40 games at Michigan and his record after those 40 games is….

28 – 12 (.700)

Not too bad you might say….well let’s see what the records were of Jim’s predecessors at Michigan after 40 games on the job:

Brady Hoke: 27 – 13

Rich Rodriguez: 15 – 22 (didn’t make it to 40 games!)

Lloyd Carr: 30 – 10

Gary Moeller: 31 – 6 – 3

Bo Schembechler: 35 – 5

Considering the Millions of Dollars that Michigan is paying Jim Harbaugh and considering not only his 28 – 12 record after 40 games and his 1 – 6 record in CRITICAL rivalry games one would think that Jim’s record would be closer to Bo’s than Brady Hoke’s and for Damn sure in the first game of Jim’s FOURTH year at Michigan one would expect a little better effort in their opening game against Notre Dame…but NO…it was a Pitiful Effort for the most part against the Irish!

Getting back to our friend who went to at least 10 Stanford games with us when Jim was coaching the Cardinal who is now in Ann Arbor, he has been poking around the Michigan Football program a bit and he joined us at Lake Tahoe in August for a week and on the first night we sat down and asked him a very simple question:

“What the Hell is going on with Michigan under Harbaugh?”

Ann Arbor Friend: I resisted my first thought for a long time but there’s little doubt in my mind now that Jim has lost the passion and fire he had for football at Stanford and certainly at the 49ers for awhile and that has seeped into the entire team and program and that is why in my opinion the team has looked so lackluster, unmotivated, almost un-coached at times in last couple of years.

We all just sat their quiet for a few seconds without anyone saying a word no doubt each of us thinking back to some of Michigan’s games the last couple of seasons and also no doubt in our minds also there’s something going on with Jim Harbaugh. We haven’t a clue what it is, but whatever is going on whether it is an outside influence or force or it is something internal Jim seems to have lost his passion and fire for football and many of things we saw at Stanford including taking care of every little detail combined with a deep passion for football is what drove Jim Harbaugh in life…and it’s just gone now in our opinion based upon what we have seen with our own eyes and what our friend on the ground in Ann Arbor at this moment is telling us.

What exactly does that mean for the immediate future of Michigan football?

It’s hard to say, but now at 0 – 1 with the below games still left to be played this is going to be one TOUGH season for the Wolverines!

Western Michigan
SMU
Nebraska
At Northwestern
Maryland
Wisconsin
At Michigan State
Penn State
At Rutgers
Indiana
At Ohio State

Michigan has everything it needs to beat every team left on its scheduled save Ohio State in Columbus but if we had to guess we would say Blue will lose the following games…

At Northwestern
Wisconsin
At Michigan State
Penn State
At Ohio State

You add in loss to Notre Dame and that’s SIX losses so let’s say Michigan only loses 4 of the above games…..that’s FIVE losses….and we have some news for Jim Harbaugh….

You cannot survive a 7 – 5 season in your FOURTH season at Michigan with each season getting worse in number of wins!

Not that we would bother Jimmy but if we could bother him right now the #1 thing we would tell him is….

Find Your Passion For The Game Of Football Again Son

….NO not for Horseshit around the game but for FOOTBALL and that is your means of salvation out of the funk that Michigan Football is now in!

Also the offensive playcalling is a Freaking Disaster and we don’t see anyone on the Michigan offensive staff that has a Damn Clue how to call plays so maybe you should call plays Jimmy!

Good Luck Son!

5. Larry Fedora, North Carolina – Larry Fedora hasn’t exactly been tearing things up in Chapel Hill as the head football coach at UNC the last six seasons….save 2015….posting records of:

2012: 8 – 4
2013: 7 – 6
2014: 6 – 7
2015: 11 – 3
2016: 8 – 5
2017: 3 – 9

With the loss to California to start the 2018 season Fedora is now…

10 – 17

….in his last 27 games coaching the Tar Heels and that’s a run that cannot continue or North Carolina will be looking for a new head coach come December and there’s a pretty good one up the road at Appalachian State in Scott Satterfield who no doubt love a shot at the UNC job who is just one of a dozen quality head and assistant coaches that would walk to Chapel Hill to coach the Tar Heels!

Now at 0 – 1 after the loss to Cal the Tar Heels have left in 2018:

At East Carolina
UCF
Pitt
At Miami
Virginia Tech
At Syracuse
At Virginia
Georgia Tech
At Duke
Western Carolina
NC State

Geez….that’s a TOUGH remaining schedule and after posting a record of 3 – 9 in 2017 one would think Fedora would have to get to 6 wins in 2018 to hang onto his job….Hell…he might need 7 wins in his SEVENTH year on the job at UNC to return and coach in 2019.

6. Willie Taggart, Florida State – We don’t have a Damn Clue what Willie Taggart and the Florida State coaching staff has been doing the last 8 months in getting FSU ready for the 2018 football season but from where we sat….

They were not doing a Damn thing

….because that was just flat-out a Damn embarrassment on Monday night against Virginia Tech for the Seminoles and Willie better Damn get this thing straightened out or he might find his ass out of a job and Lane Kiffin coaching Florida State before Willie can even get settled in Tallahassee! Oh…that Lane Kiffin to Florida State idea was given to us by an FSU-alum we have know since the late 1980s when couple of us lived in Florida who called us on the way home from the Va. Tech – FSU game and was ripping Willie Taggart and the FSU coaching staff for nothing short of a Total Freaking Disaster…and he is right….it was a Total Freaking Disaster!

Looking at what Florida State has left on its 2018 schedule if the 0 – 1 Seminoles play like they did against Virginia Tech….

Samford
At Syracuse
Northern Illinois
At Louisville
At Miami
Wake Forest
Clemson
At NC State
At Notre Dame
Boston College
Florida

…they will be LUCKY to win 5 games and if FSU wins less than 5 games Willie Taggart will be fired in early December especially if Lane Kiffin is sitting on another 10+ win season at FAU, and it will not matter One Damn Iota what the buyout is because that was Freaking Coaching Malpractice against Virginia Tech with the FSU coaches actually make the players worse than if they had just coached themselves!

Get Off Your Damn Ass Willie!

7. Kalani Sitake, BYU – It was nice to see Kalani Sitake get a solid win over Arizona on Saturday night because we personally like Coach Sitake and hope he succeeds at BYU just as all our Good Mormon friends in Utah do but just like our Good Mormon friends in Utah we are not going to tolerate BYU Football being Average or Below Average and thus why this is such a CRITCAL year for Sitake to get this ship righted!

With the win over the Wildcats Sitake’s record at BYU now stands at….

14 – 13

….and the Cougars have left to play in 2018:

Cal
At Wisconsin
McNeese
At Washington
Utah State
Hawaii
Northern Illinois
At Boise State
At UMass
New Mexico State
At Utah

That’s a pretty tough remaining schedule for BYU but we have it on pretty good authority that if Sitake can get to 6 wins in 2018 and thus the Cougars back to a bowl game there’s a better than “90% chance” that Sitake returns to coach BYU in 2019….but less than 6 wins….there’s a ”90% chance BYU makes a coaching change” so the Cougars need to find 5 more wins in their remaining 11 games.

Not easy….but certainly doable if BYU Football has improved on their 4 – 9 Total Disaster from a season ago!

8. Luke Fickell, Cincinnati – Luke Fickell and his Cincinnati football team got a Must Win over a lackluster UCLA team to open the 2018 season but the Bearcats will need to keep things rolling to get their head coach off the Hot Seat and here’s what they have coming up:

At Miami, Ohio
Alabama A&M
Ohio
At UConn
Tulane
At Temple
At SMU
Navy
USF
At UCF
East Carolina

It’s a kind of a tough schedule but Cincinnati should be able to win at least 6 games in 2018 with 1 win already on the board and if they don’t win 6 games this season…..

Pitiful….Just Pitiful!

9. Lovie Smith, Illinois – It was a challenge for Lovie Smith’s Illini to beat a below average Kent State team at home on Saturday in Smith’s 25 th game coaching Illinois which adds up to records in 3 seasons at the school of:

Overall: 6 – 19

Big Ten: 2 – 16

Now at 1 – 0 Illinois has left to play in 2018….

Western Illinois
USF
Penn State
At Rutgers
Purdue
At Wisconsin
At Maryland
Minnesota
At Nebraska
Iowa
At Northwestern

…and if you can barely beat Kent State how many of the above games can Illini win in 2018?

Our guess…maybe 2 or 3…tops 4!

We will go 4 – 8 for Illini in 2018 and a new head football coach at Illinois by Christmas!

10. Tom Herman, Texas – We have 2 long-term fishing buddies in Austin who are Texas-alums that we have fished all over Texas with the last 20 or so years and after Texas lost to Maryland on Saturday we called one of those fishing buddies to get his take on the situation at Texas with head coach Tom Herman now sitting on records of….

Overall: 7 – 7

Big 12: 5 – 4

…and his response was:

“If Tom Herman is going to be an Arrogant Ass that’s OK with me…but he better start Damn winning some football games because he won’t last long being an Arrogant Ass and an Average Coach!”

We took that “he won’t last long” meaning that if Tom Herman doesn’t show significant improvement in 2018 the alums might start looking for a new head coach that is NOT…

An Arrogant Ass AND Can Win Some Football Games

…and with that in mind let’s see what the 0 – 1 Horns have left in 2018:

Tulsa
USC
TCU
At Kansas State
Oklahoma
Baylor
At Oklahoma State
West Virginia
At Texas Tech
Iowa State
At Kansas

We cannot see how Texas wins less than 8 games in 2018 with Tulsa and Kansas on the schedule but if Herman has improved Texas over that Pitiful Performance in 2017 then 9 wins seems like the mark that Herman needs to hit when you factor in that he is an Arrogant Ass!

Arrogant Asses have to win ONE more game a season to stay off the Hot Seat than Non-Arrogant Asses is how the rule works!

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BYU, Cincinnati, Coaches Hot Seat, Coaches Hot Seat Rankings, David Beaty, Florida State, Illinois, Jim Harbaugh, Kalani Sitake, Kansas, Kliff Kingsbury, Larry Fedora, Lovie Smith, Luke Fickell, Michgian, North Carolina, Ohio State, Texas, Texas Tech, Tom Herman, Urban Meyer, Willie Taggart

Post Spring 2018 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

Harry May 1, 2018 0 Comments

With the 2018 College Football Spring Games almost complete it’s time to take a look at the Head Coaches now sitting on the Hot Seat and look towards the Fall as we celebrate Spring and look towards Summer vacations ourselves. We also need to look ahead to the 2018 schedules for each of the teams with Head Coaches on the Hot Seat and guess on a win/loss record and if the Head Coach will still be employed by the school by the time the middle of December rolls around.

Let’s bring out the Great Johnny Cash to give a Spring Hello to the Head Coaches now on the Hot Seat! Give ‘Em Hell Johnny!

Thank You Mr. Cash!

Coaches Hot Seat Ranking – May 2018

#1 – 10 CFB Head Coaches on the Hot Seat – May 2018

1. David Beaty, Kansas – David Beaty is entering his 4 th season as the head coach of the Kansas Jayhawks and his records are Not Good…make that…they are Damn Ugly!

Overall: 3 – 33

Big 12: 1 – 26

Let’s not forget in this spot that current Kansas AD Sheahon Zenger also hired Charlie Weis to coach Kansas in 2012 and Weis + Beaty’s records combined with Interim Head Coach Clint Bowen have posted records over the past 6 years of….

Overall: 9 – 62

Big 12: 3 – 51

If you were wondering how Sheaon Zenger is still employed at Kansas you are not alone but let’s look at the 2018 schedule for the Total Damn Disaster that is the Kansas Football Program and see where this train wreck is going:

Nicholls
At Central Michigan
Rutgers
At Baylor
Oklahoma State
At West Virginia
At Texas Tech
TCU
Iowa State
At Kansas State
At Oklahoma
Texas

That looks to us like a record of….

1 – 11

2 – 10

…..for Kansas in 2018 and there’s no way David Beaty can survive another Total Damn Disaster of a season….right?

Who the Hell knows….after all….this is Kansas!

2. Lovie Smith, Illinois – We still haven’t a clue why Lovie Smith was hired as the head football coach at Illinois since Lovie did nothing in his coaching career to make us think he would EVER be a successful college head coach.

In fact, having watched Lovie Smith coach closely in his 11 seasons as the head coach of the Chicago Bears and Tampa Bay Buccaneers it’s our opinion that Lovie is a classic “NFL Coach” and therefore would always be an Average College Head Coach at best and so far….

Lovie has been a Well-Below Average College Head Coach!

Lovie Smith’s records at Illinois:

Overall: 5 – 19

Big Ten: 2 – 16

Not good….let’s look at the 2018 Illinois Football Schedule to see where this may be going….

Kent State
Western Illinois
USF
Penn State
At Rutgers
Purdue
At Wisconsin
At Maryland
Minnesota
At Nebraska
Iowa
At Northwestern

That looks like 3 or 4 wins for Lovie Smith and the Illini in 2018 and….

There’s Not A Chance In Hell Lovie Smith can survive 4 win or less season and return to coach Illinois in 2019.

3. Kliff Kingsbury, Texas Tech – If anyone had told us before the 2013 college football season that Kliff Kingsbury would be sitting on records of…

Overall: 30 – 33

Big 12: 16 – 29

….at Texas Tech and that Kliff still be the head coach of the Red Raiders we wouldn’t believe it and yet….

Kliff Kingsbury is still the head coach in Lubbock!

Got Nuts? Yep!

Can Kliff Kingsbury possibly keep his job by posting another .500 or so records each season at Texas Tech?

We haven’t a Damn Clue but the standards have been lowered so much for Texas Tech Football maybe Kliff can hang onto his job in the middle of an incredibly Mediocre Run the last 5 seasons and with that in mind let’s look at the Red Raiders 2018 schedule…

Ole Miss
Lamar
Houston
At Oklahoma State
West Virginia
At TCU
Kansas
At Iowa State
Oklahoma
Texas
At Kansas State
Baylor

Best Case Scenario: Texas Tech wins 7 games

Worst Case Scenario: Texas Tech wins 4 games

Can Kliff Kingsbury survive to coach Texas Tech another year with just 7 wins in 2018?

Maybe so…and that says a Helluva Lot about how accepting of Mediocrity folks in Lubbock have become and let’s just hope that disease doesn’t spread to the rest of America because it would destroy our country!

4. Luke Fickell, Cincinnati – Luke Fickell is entering his 3 rd season as a head coach in his 2 nd year at Cincinnati and fans of college football will remember that Fickell took over a Loaded Ohio State team after Jim Tressel got fired in the Spring of 2011 and promptly went 6 – 6 taking his team to a Gator Bowl which cost an undefeated Ohio State football team a chance to play for a National Title in 2012 under Urban Meyer.

The question for us here at Coaches Hot Seat as we look at Fickell’s two years as a head coach….

Overall: 10 – 15

Conference: 5 – 11

…and his record at Cincinnati after one year….

Overall: 4 – 8

AAC: 2 – 6

….does Luke Fickell have a Damn Clue how to be a head coach?

That question will be answered in 2018 because this 2 nd season under Fickell should be a bounce-back year to at least a .500 record and with that in mind let’s look at the Bearcats 2018 schedule:

At UCLA
At Miami (Ohio)
Alabama A&M
Ohio
At UConn
Tulane
At Temple
At SMU
Navy
USF
At UCF
East Carolina

Cincinnati should win at least…6 games in 2018….but will Fickell coach the Bearcats to at least 6 wins?

No….in our humble opinion and more than likely because Fickell has a Totally Damn Absurd buyout in his contract the folks at Cincinnati will have to tolerate Below Mediocrity for the foreseeable future….in our humble opinion!

5. Kalani Sitake, BYU – Kalani Sitake took over a BYU Football team from former head coach Bronco Mendenhall who posted…

11 straight winning seasons

….which Sitake continued in Year 1 with a record of….

9 – 4

…but in Year 2 the Cougars dropped to…

4 – 9

….and now Sitake is coaching for his job because we don’t think there’s ANY CHANCE the folks in Provo will tolerate two straight losing seasons which takes us to BYU’s 2018 schedule:

At Arizona
California
At Wisconsin
McNeese
At Washington
Utah State
Hawaii
Northern Illinois
At Boise State
At UMass
New Mexico State
At Utah

There’s at least 6 wins on that schedule and thus No Good Excuse for Kalani Sitake and his Cougars to have a losing record in 2018!

6. Jim Harbaugh, Michigan – When one looks at Jim Harbaugh’s records in three years at Michigan…

2015: 10 – 3
2016: 10 – 3
2017: 8 – 5

Overall: 28 – 11

Big Ten: 18 – 8

….they don’t look too bad but when realizes that Michigan has played 22 FBS teams with .500 or better records the last three seasons and Jimmy’s record against those teams is…

10 – 12

….it’s easy to understand why Jimmy is now sitting on the Hot Seat!

Jim Harbaugh is being paid an enormous amount of money….

$7 Million Plus Annually

……to build a Championship Football Program at Michigan meaning….

Winning Big Ten Championships
Playing in College Football Playoff
Winning National Championships

….and in April 2018 the above goals seem so far away one must start to wonder….

How long can this Mediocrity continue for Jim Harbaugh at Michigan?

The word from a close Michigan alum in San Francisco is….

“If Jim only wins 8 games again in 2018 he will not be the head coach of Blue in December.”

With that in mind let’s look at the 2018 Michigan Football Schedule:

At Notre Dame
Western Michigan
SMU
Nebraska
At Northwestern
Maryland
Wisconsin
At Michigan State
Penn State
At Rutgers
Indiana
At Ohio State

If Michigan can beat Notre Dame in South Bend on the opening weekend then maybe Blue can be 3 – 0 heading into Big Ten play but with Scott Frost now in Lincoln, and the second game at Northwestern, along with at least FOUR other Big Ten games where Michigan might be the underdog it’s not hard to conjure up another….

8 – 4

…record of Michigan in 2018 and if that happens….

Michigan will have a new head football coach before January 1, 2019.

Where could Jim Harbaugh end up if things don’t work out at Michigan?

Our guess —-> New York Jets for 2019 season!

7. Ed Orgeron, LSU – In two seasons at LSU Ed Orgeron is sitting on records of…

Overall: 15 – 6

SEC: 10 – 4

….but let’s get serious here in the last two seasons under Coach O LSU has played…

14 FBS Teams with .500 or better records

…and the Tigers’ record in those games is…

8 – 6

…and in case you didn’t know it…

That’s NOT LSU Football!

Let’s go to the 2018 LSU schedule to see where this could be going in Baton Rouge….

Miami (Dallas)
SE Louisiana
At Auburn
La. Tech
Ole Miss
At Florida
Georgia
Mississippi State
Alabama
At Arkansas
Rice
At Texas A&M

Geez…that’s a pretty TOUGH schedule and if LSU loses that opening game to Miami in Dallas it’s not hard to imagine the Tigers being…

3 – 2

…heading to Gainesville to play Florida with….

Georgia
Mississippi State
Alabama

….up next for Coach O.

Our guess….LSU ends up with a record of….

5 – 7

…in 2018 and LSU had a new head football coach before January 1, 2019!

This would be a GREAT season for Lane Kiffin to put up 11 – 1 or at worst 10 – 2 season at Florida Atlantic which opens the season at Oklahoma if Lane is hoping to get a head coaching job in the SEC namely in Baton Rouge!

8. Major Applewhite, Houston – Big Houston booster Tilman Fertita has made it clear he is not going to tolerate Houston football slipping back into Mediocrity after the Cougars posted a record of…

22 – 4

….in Tom Herman’s two seasons at Houston which is especially GREAT compared to the….

7 – 6

…record that Major Applewhite posted in his first year on the job in H-Town!

We have it on “very good authority” that if Major Applewhite wins less than…

10 Games in 2018

….that his job will be in serious jeopardy after the Cougars play at Memphis on November 23.

With that in mind let’s go to the 2018 Houston schedule:

At Rice
Arizona
At Texas Tech
Texas Southern
Tulsa
At East Carolina
At Navy
USF
At SMU
Temple
Tulane
At Memphis

If you think Houston is going to win at least 10 games with the above schedule then you are seeing something we aren’t for Damn sure!

9. Larry Fedora, North Carolina – You can sit around all day trying to figure out why North Carolina took a step back in 2017 under head coach Larry Fedora but when one realizes that the Tar Heels were ranked…

#88 in Scoring Defense giving up 31.3 points per game

AND

#83 in Scoring Offense scoring 26 points per game

…you are not going to win a Helluva lot of football games and thus the…

3 – 9

….UNC record last season!

Larry Fedora’s records in SIX seasons at North Carolina don’t look too bad…

Overall: 43 – 34

ACC: 27 – 21

….but Fedora cannot survive another losing season in Chapel Hill and with that let’s look at the Tar Heels 2016 schedule:

At California
At East Carolina
UCF
Pitt
At Miami
Virginia Tech
At Syracuse
At Virginia
Georgia Tech
At Duke
Western Carolina
NC State

It may be hard for North Carolina to win at least 6 games in 2018 with that schedule unless there is a dramatic turnaround on both sides of the ball and if UNC only wins 5 games this coming season…

Larry Fedora’s head coaching career is probably OVER at least at the Power 5 Level….which should be Plenty of Damn Pressure to motivate Larry!

10. Dana Holgorsen, West Virginia – The most Damning record for Dana Holgorsen in his SIX seasons at West Virginia is the Mountaineers record in Big 12 Conference play since WVU joined the Big 12 in the 2012 season:

27 – 27

Getting above .500 and going to bowl games at West Virginia each season which is certainly geographically challenged in the Big 12 Conference is kind of an accomplishment….but come on now….don’t we all expect more out of West Virginia football that just…

Mediocrity?

YES!

Let’s look at West Virginia’s 2018 schedule….

Tennessee (Charlotte)
Youngstown State
At NC State
Kansas State
At Texas Tech
Kansas
At Iowa State
Baylor
At Texas
TCU
At Oklahoma State
Oklahoma

That looks like another 7 – 5 season for Holgorsen at West Virginia in 2018 and will that be acceptable to the folks in Morgantown?

We haven’t a Damn Clue…but we sure Hell wouldn’t accept it!

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BYU, Cincinnati, Coaches Hot Seat, Coaches Hot Seat Rankings, Dana Holgorsen, David Beaty, Ed Orgeron, Houston, Illinois, Jim Harbaugh, Kalani Sitake, Kansas, Kliff Kingsbury, Larry Fedora, Lovie Smith, LSU, Luck Fickell, Major Applewhite, Michigan, North Carolina, Texas Tech, West Virginia

Post Week 8 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

Harry October 24, 2017 0 Comments

Post Week 8 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

Thanks Mr. Cash!

1. Butch Jones, Tennessee – The overall record for Butch Jones at Tennessee is bad enough…

33 – 25

….in his FIFTH year on the job but it’s Jones record in SEC Conference play that is the reason he’s headed for the chopping block…

14 – 22

…with these games still left to be played in 2017:

At Kentucky
Southern Miss
At Missouri
LSU
Vanderbilt

Yep…even if Butch Jones and his Vols won their last 4 SEC Conference games his record in SEC play would still just be…

18 – 22

….and there’s No Chance In Hell that fans of Tennessee Football should tolerate Butch Jones’ SEC record and thus that’s why the Vols will have a new head football coach come 2018!

Our guess…Tennessee finishes with a 4 – 8 record in 2017 and a Total Damn Mess on its hands as the folks in Knoxville try to figure out where to go next….here’s a tip for Tennessee AD John Currie when considering who to hire as the next head football coach at Tennessee:

Imagine in your mind’s eye Nick Saban’s reaction to hearing the name of the person who Tennessee hired to be its next head football coach. Is Nick smiling, does he have no reaction, does he grunt and think that maybe the Vols will be a tough win now. Don’t hire the coach that makes Nick Saban smile Currie!

2. Bret Bielema, Arkansas – With the loss to Auburn on Saturday Bret Bielema’s record in SEC play in his FIFTH year on the job is now at…

10 – 26

….which is a winning percentage of…

.278

…and the previous two head coaches at Arkansas Houston Nutt and Bobby Petrino posted a combined winning percentage in SEC Conference play of…

.527

Considering the above there is a very good argument that could be made that Bret Bielema is the…

WORST HIRE

…in the SEC Conference since the end of World War II which would mean Arkansas AD Jeff Long has hired as the head coach of the Razorbacks:

Bobby Petrino – Wouldn’t hire to wash our cars!
John L. Smith – Only an insane person would hire John L. Smith!
Bret Bielema – The WORST hire in SEC since end of World War II!

Now at 2 – 5 on the season Arkansas still has to play this season games against…

At Ole Miss
Coastal Carolina
At LSU
Mississippi State
Missouri

…and there is a very real chance that the Hogs finish with just THREE wins in Bret Bielema’s FIFTH year on the job in Fayetteville!

Got fire the whole Damn Arkansas athletic department?

You do if you don’t want Arkansas Football Totally Destroyed!

3. David Beaty, Kansas – It was just Stupid at Kansas but after the Jayhawks 43 – 0 loss to TCU the week after losing to Iowa State 45 – 0 it’s just…

Who gives a Damn about Kansas Football?

…and the answer to that question would be…NO ONE AT ALL!

David Beaty is in his THIRD season at Kansas and his records are…

Overall: 3 – 28

Big 12: 1 – 21

…and if Beaty isn’t fired before December 1 then why in the Hell is Kansas even bothering to play football?

Same goes for Kansas AD Sheahon Zenger who hired Charlie Weis and David Beaty and if Zenger worked in the Real World and not on a college campus his ass would have been…

Fired Long Ago!

4. Mike Riley, Nebraska – Mike Riley had a good week in the bye week because the Huskers didn’t get their ass whipped and now the 3 – 4 Huskers travel to play a decent Purdue team that somehow just lost to Rutgers and if Nebraska loses this game it will be because the Husker players have…

Flat-Out Quit

….but there are many here at Coaches Hot Seat that believe a lot of Husker football players Flat-Out Quit against Ohio State!

3 – 4 Nebraska has left in 2017….

At Purdue
Northwestern
At Minnesota
At Penn State
Iowa

….which looks to us like a losing season for the Huskers but Mike Riley had 5 losing seasons in 14 seasons coaching at Oregon State…including the season before he was hired at Nebraska…which makes one wonder…

Why in the Hell was Mike Riley hired at Nebraska?

Because former Nebraska Athletic Director Shawn Eichorst doesn’t know his ass from the side of a barn…that’s why!

5. Lovie Smith, Illinois – With the Illini’s loss to Minnesota on Saturday Lovie Smith’s records at Illinois now stand at…

Overall: 5 – 14

Big Ten: 2 – 11

…and those 5 wins were over:

Murray State
Rutgers
Michigan State
Ball State
Western Kentucky

Please….can someone….anyone…tell us why Lovie Smith is the head football coach at Illinois?

Didn’t think so!

6. Jim Harbaugh, Michigan – A few Coaches Hot Seat members were there on the day that Jim Harbaugh was introduced as the new head football coach at Stanford in December 2006 and we were there when Stanford beat USC in Jimmy’s first season in early October 2006 at the LA Coliseum and we were there for ALL of Jimmy’s FOUR seasons on The Farm and thus we believe we know Jimmy Harbaugh very well!

With the above in mind it’s obvious to us that something is…

Terribly Wrong at Michigan

….and it goes beyond Jimmy’s record in his last 11 games which is by the way…

6 – 5

…and we are not going to pretend we know what is going but there’s something….

Terribly Wrong at Michigan

…in our humble opinion of course!

Most surprising of all to us here at Coaches Hot Seat who watched Jim Harbaugh recruit Andrew Luck and several other solid quarterbacks to Stanford when the 2017 season kicked-off Michigan didn’t have a FBS-level QB on its roster which begs the question?

What the Hell is going on Jimmy?

Well let’s see here….watching replays of Michigan’s games against Michigan State and Penn State we have come to the following conclusions about the Wolverines offense = Jim Harbaugh’s offense:

1. Michigan doesn’t have a FBS-level QB on its roster. Hell, Michigan doesn’t have a college-level QB on its roster. Hell, Michigan doesn’t have a high school level QB on its roster! Yes…that’s a Helluva problem Jimmy!

2. The Michigan Offensive line could be easily whipped in a fist fight by 3…maybe even 2…members of Coaches Hot Seat and as a group there is not a bigger group of Candy Asses in America…save the Candy Ass Tech Boys in Silicon Valley…than the Michigan Offensive Line. Yes…that’s a Helluva problem Jimmy!

3. The Michigan Running Backs and Wide Receivers are hardly coached at all and if they are coached the coaches that are coaching them should be fired…like this afternoon! SOFT and LAZY are the words that come to mind when we think of the Michigan Running Backs and Wide Receivers and…Yes, that’s a Helluva problem Jimmy!

4. The Michigan offensive play-calling in one word is…SHIT! Make that TOTAL SHIT..and Yes, that’s a Helluva problem Jimmy!

Besides all of the above you have a pretty decent offense at Michigan this season Jimmy!

Michigan is now 5 – 2 in 2017 and still has the below games left on their schedule:

Rutgers
Minnesota
At Maryland
At Wisconsin
Ohio State

Hell….Michigan might only win 2…maybe 3…more games in 2017 which is Jim Harbaugh’s THIRD year on the job and we only have the following to say to Jimmy Harbaugh:

Get your Damn ass together Son or your head coaching career is going to be over in a flash!

7. Kalani Sitake, BYU – The calls from our Mormon friends in Utah started about four weeks ago after Utah State beat BYU by the score of…

40 – 24

…and if you have Mormon friends then you know….

These folks don’t complain about ANYTHING

…and yet their calls keep coming and they are saying things like….

“You just cannot believe what is going on behind the scenes of BYU football.”

“BYU football is just the biggest mess you can possible imagine.”

“I am shocked about what I am being told is going on in Provo.”

At first we didn’t know what to think but after BYU lost to East Carolina..one of the worst teams in FBS football…on Saturday by the score of…

33 – 17

…we are now convinced after doing some checking of our own that BYU Football is in a Meltdown for the Ages in the history of college football in America and that the Cougars might not win another game this season even with some very weak teams left on their schedule:

San Jose State
At Fresno State
At UNLV
UMass
At Hawaii

Because the information we have gathered is second-hand we are not going to write our opinion on what is going on with BYU Football but we will say this…if the current trend continues….BYU may very well have a new head football coach come December and the Kalani Sitake era at BYU will be over before it really even got started.

8. Kliff Kingsbury, Texas Tech – If there was one thing that Kliff Kingsbury could not have let happened in Year FIVE as the head coach at Texas Tech was let Iowa State come into Lubbock and whip his Red Raiders on Homecoming weekend which leaves Kingsbury’s records now at…

Overall: 28 – 29

Big 12: 14 – 26

…and Texas Tech now at 4 – 3 on the season still having to play these teams:

At Oklahoma
Kansas State
Baylor
TCU
At Texas

Damn….it’s going to be mighty hard for Texas Tech to get to 6 wins on the season and less than 6 wins in 2017 and Kingsbury will have posted…

3 Losing Seasons in 5 Years on the Job

….which even at Texas Tech will get your ass fired…right?

Right!

Since it seems obvious that now member of TCU coaching staff Sonny Dykes would be a natural fit as the head coach at Texas Tech we would recommend that Kingsbury find a way to get to at least SEVEN wins in 2017 or more than likely the folks in Lubbock will be hiring them a new head football coach December.

9. Larry Fedora, North Carolina – After North Carolina’s 59 – 7 loss to Virginia Tech on Saturday one has to wonder if the Tar Heels have totally quit on head coach Larry Fedora or maybe this is just God’s way of getting justice against the North Carolina Athletic Department which somehow was able to get away with…

Totally Not Monitoring the Academic Activities of its Athletes

…for decades but whatever the reason for the current slide of UNC Football there is one thing we know for sure….

North Carolina is getting its ass-whipped on a regular basis in 2017 and either Larry Fedora will fix this mess in Chapel Hill or his ass should and will get run right out of town!

North Carolina is now 1 – 7 on the season and has left to play…

Miami
At Pitt
Western Carolina
At NC State

Got 2 – 10 Larry?

You are about to have it Son!

10. Jim McElwain, Florida – It seems that Jim McElwain’s luck is finally running out which began long before he got the head coaching job at Florida and actually began when Nick Saban plucked Jimmy from Fresno State to be the offensive coordinator at Alabama where…

Any Damn Moron can get the Alabama offense to score 30+ points a game

…which then led to Jimmy getting the Colorado State job where he did some decent work and then the Florida job where Jimmy was fortunate enough to arrive in Gainesville when the SEC East was the weakest it has been since the SEC went to two divisions BUT Oh those days are over and on Saturday the 3 – 3 Gators get to play a Georgia Football team that is actually a…

Georgia Football Team

…and by late Saturday night the Gators will no doubt be 3 – 4 with these games still left on the schedule:

At Missouri
At South Carolina
UBA
Florida State

Hell…Florida will be lucky to win 6 games in 2017 and thus it looks like Jim McElwain will be on the Hot Seat for the foreseeable future.

Oh and here’s something else Jimmy..not only could Any Damn Moron get the Alabama offense to score 30+ points a game…

Any Damn Moron can win 8 games a year at Florida!

Personally we like Jim McElwain and ran into him a couple of times when he was with the Oakland Raiders in 2006 and in the Flathead Valley of Montana where we are almost every Summer for a fishing trip BUT Jimmy if you are presented with a good head coaching job offer at another Power 5 school in the coming weeks…you might want to consider it Jimmy because things are about to get really HOT in Gainesville not withstanding whatever Yahoos have been sending you and your players death threats which should be turned over to the police immediately!

Coach ‘Em Up Jimmy!

Uncategorized

Alabama, Arkansas, Bret Bielema, Butch Jones, BYU, David Beaty, Florida, Georgia, Illinois, Jim Harbaugh, Jim McElwain, Kalani Sitake, Kansas, Kliff Kingsbury, Larry Fedora, Lovie Smith, Michigan, Mike Riley, Nebraska, Nick Saban, North Carolina, SEC, Tennessee, Texas Tech, UNC, UNJC

18 CFB Head Coaches Facing MUST WIN Games in Week 3 – Take It To The Limit Coaches + Teams

Harry September 14, 2017 0 Comments

Week 2 was interesting on the MUST WIN Game front with coaches under lots of the pressure going…

4 – 6

….in their MUST WIN Games which just turns up the HEAT even more on those coaches that lost, and in Week 3 there are 18 CFB Head Coaches facing MUST WIN Games and with that in mind we ask the Eagles and Randy Meisner to motivate these Coaches + Teams To Take It To the Limit to get a win in these games. Bring It Randy!

Thanks Randy!

Rich Rodriguez, Arizona vs. UTEP – Going back to the loss to Washington State at home in 2015 in Arizona’s last 20 games Rich Rodriguez has posted a record of…

6 – 14

…which his nothing short of a Complete Freaking Disaster for Arizona Football and thus after a home loss to Houston there is just No Damn Way Rodriguez and his Wildcats can lose to UTEP in El Paso on Friday night. If Rodriguez did lose this game to an UTEP coach in Sean Kugler who is also on the Hot Seat and has posted a record of 18 – 33 in four-plus seasons on the job then RichRod might as well call the movers on the way back to Tucson because it’s….

….time in the desert!

Mark Whipple, UMass vs. Temple – In the last four seasons Mark Whipple has posted a record at UMass of…

8 – 31

…and one would think sooner or later one would have to start winning some football games to keep your job…even at UMass…right?

Yep…Temple is a MUST WIN Game for Mark Whipple and the Minuteman but we don’t give them much of a chance to win this MUST WIN Game!

Scottie Montgomery, East Carolina vs. Virginia Tech – Scottie Montgomery’s East Carolina football team is in a mini-meltdown with the defensive coordinator being let go and Montgomery off to an 0 – 2 start in 2017 after posting a 3 – 9 record last season and now here comes Virginia Tech showing up in Week 3 in a MUST WIN Game spot is far from optimal, but with a game against USF on deck beating the Hokies is a MUST WIN because a loss here and the Pirates might not win a game in 2017!

Coach against Virginia Tech like your job is on the line Scottie Montgomery…because it is!

David Shaw, Stanford vs. San Diego State – A few Coaches Hot Seat members were at the LA Coliseum for the Stanford – USC game last Saturday and it was apparent in the pregame that the Trojans were JACKED to play the Cardinal and that it was going to take 40+ points to beat USC which Stanford didn’t have in them even if David Shaw had coached the game to score 40+ points…which he didn’t!

Now here come a road game at San Diego State which just beat Arizona State in Tempe and this is truly a cross-roads game for Stanford in 2017 because a loss to the Aztecs means that EVERY team left on the Cardinal schedule can beat Stanford but a win in this spot to improve to 2 – 1 with UCLA and Arizona State at home on The Farm up next Stanford will have a chance to get things rolling in 2017…but first they MUST BEAT San Diego State in what is a MUST WIN Game for David Shaw and his football team.

Be ready a battle boys and if you are not ready to fight…just stay in northern California because the Aztecs will whip and embarrass your asses for all the country to see!

Gary Andersen, Oregon State vs. Washington State – We consider Oregon State to be a school that in today’s world where there are several strong teams in the Pac-12 North Division as a place where a solid head coach will win 6 to 7 games a year and take the Beavers to a bowl game every season. In 14 seasons as the head coach at Oregon State Mike Riley posted a record of…

93 – 80

…and took the Beavers to a postseason bowl game in…

8 of the 14 seasons

…so in our opinion Mike Riley fell short of what Oregon State Football should be especially considering that the Pac-12 North division is a lot tougher division today than it was in the past.

Gary Andersen is a solid football coach but he will have to recruit and coach at a high level to get Oregon State to 6+ wins year in and year out and after a 1 – 1 start that includes getting blasted by Colorado State and barely beating Portland State this Saturday’s match-up with Washington State is a MUST WIN Game with the following games on deck…

Washington
At USC
Colorado
Stanford

Yep…beating the Cougs is a MUST WIN Game for Gary Andersen and the Beavers!

Butch Jones, Tennessee vs. Florida – Butch Jones is a Tennessee player from not making a hustle play in the 4 th quarter against Georgia Tech to cause a fumble giving the Vols the chance to win in overtime and start the 2017 season at 2 – 0 instead of 1 – 1 after a win over Cupcake Indiana State and now the actual season begins for Tennessee with a MUST WIN Game at The Swamp against Florida on Saturday.

If Tennessee did lose to the Gators on Saturday Butch Jones record in SEC Conference play in his last 7 SEC games would drop to…

2 – 5

….and Jones would find his ass heating up again with the 4 following games coming right at the Vols:

Georgia
South Carolina
At Alabama
At Kentucky

Yep….we recommend Butch Jones and Tennessee find a way to beat Florida on Saturday or back up the Hot Seat Rankings Butch Jones will climb!

Jim McElwain, Florida vs. Tennessee – In two-plus seasons at Florida Jim McElwain has posted impressive records of…

Overall: 19 – 9

SEC: 13 – 3

….but this is FLORIDA Football we are talking about here where any coach should be able to drop a few footballs by the practice field and the Gators would win 8+ games a season if the coaches have recruited at all and thus we are going to hold Jim McElwain and ANY Florida Football coach to a very high standard.

The problem for Jim McElwain and Florida after the opening season debacle game against Michigan which exposed a Gators offense that can be easily shutdown is that a loss in this spot to the Vols to drop to 0 – 2 with these games coming up….

Vanderbilt
LSU
Texas A&M
Georgia (Jacksonville)
At Missouri
At South Carolina
UAB
Florida State

….it’s not hard to imagine Florida not getting 6 wins in 2017 with the Northern Colorado game being cancelled and if Jim McElwain doesn’t win 6 games this season he will need to win 10+ games in 2018 or his ass will be sent packing out of Gainesville!

Jim Mora, UCLA vs. Memphis – Most people don’t realize how important..make that VITAL….it was for Jim Mora and UCLA to come back and beat Texas A&M in their opening game because after dispatching Hawaii in Week 2 the schedule gets a lot tougher beginning with a game…

At Memphis

….on Saturday and if the Bruins did lose to Memphis with these games still on the schedule…

At Stanford
Colorado
At Arizona
Oregon
At Washington
At Utah
Arizona State
At USC
Cal

…there’s a decent chance UCLA doesn’t win 6 games in 2017 and BIG buyout or not Jim Mora would probably find his ass out of a job come December after two straight losing seasons in Westwood!

David Beaty, Kansas vs. Ohio – Kansas Football or not we would like to think that a head coach of the Kansas Jayhawks football team could in his…

26 th Game

…as a head coach take his Big 12 Conference Football Team to Athens, Ohio and beat a MAC Conference Ohio University Football Team…right?

Damn Right is the answer to that question!

There just is NO Legitimate Excuse for Kansas Football to lose this game to Ohio on Saturday and thus this is a MUST WIN Game for David Beaty and his football team with these Big 12 games left on the schedule:

West Virginia
Texas Tech
At Iowa State
At TCU
Kansas State
Baylor
At Texas
Oklahoma
At Oklahoma State

Damn….if Kansas loses to Ohio…in our opinion…the Jayhawks will not win another game in 2017 to finish the season at….

1 – 11

…with only a win over SE Missouri State.

Coach em hard David Beaty!

Bronco Mendenhall, Virginia vs. UConn – The Bronco Mendenhall experiment at Virginia which is as much about Bronco not being at BYU as being at Virginia is off to a rough start with a record of….

3 – 11

…on the board two games into his second season at Charlottesville and we are fascinated to see how this all plays out. Bronco Mendenhall is a very good football coach, but he also is a man who like Mitt Romney, who a few of us have run into many times over the years, someone that carries his religion with him to such an extent it dominates his life as much at Catholicism dominated the lives of past head coaches at Notre Dame. We have many Mormon friends in the state of Utah who we visit for at least a week every Summer which includes lots of outdoor activities and sporting contests and we fight like brothers with them to win everything from golf to ping-pong all day long and then at night they go home and we go out to get a few beers at the bars on main street in Park City. We love our Mormon friends because they are not merely “Good People”…they are…”Great People” who are the kind of folks you could always count on if you were ever in trouble and Bronco Mendenhall is cut from the same mold as our friends in Utah, and that’s why it is so fascinating to us to see if Mendenhall can succeed outside of the cocoon that he lived in at BYU…and like it or not BYU is a cocoon…that is somewhat separate from much of American life such as how life is lived in Charlottesville, Virginia.

We are pulling hard for Bronco Mendenhall to succeed at Virginia but after getting beat by Indiana at home last Saturday to drop to 1 – 1 on the season this week’s game at home against UConn is a MUST WIN Game because of what is left on the Cavs schedule:

At Boise State
Duke
At North Carolina
Boston College
At Pitt
Georgia Tech
At Louisville
At Miami
Virginia Tech

With a loss to UConn on Saturday we don’t think Virginia will have any chance at all to get to 6 wins in 2017 with the above schedule so with that mind…

Give the UConn Huskies Heck Bronco!

Mike Riley, Nebraska vs. Northern Illinois – Mike Riley is now in his 3 rd season at Nebraska and he has coached 28 games and posted an overall record of…

16 – 12 (.571)

Below are the records after 28 games of the Nebraska head coaches after Tom Osborne:

Frank Solich: 23 – 5 (.821)

Bill Callahan: 17 – 11 (.607)

Bo Pelini: 20 – 8 (.714)

As anyone can clearly see Mike Riley is 4 th in winning percentage…

Frank Solich: .821
Bo Pelini: .714
Bill Callahan: .607
Mike Riley: .571

….in the head coaches following the Great Tom Osborne at Nebraska and Riley knows that if he continues along the current path his tenure in Lincoln will not be long.

The thing about coaching at Nebraska is the head coach feels the pressure of the job but he has a hard time finding where that pressure is coming from since the folks in the state of Nebraska are so nice and disarming and just downright decent, but we can tell Mike Riley that after having friends in the Omaha area for over two decades that are Nebraska-alums Riley’s performance to date is something that is discussed on a regular basis and if Riley doesn’t get things going with the Cornhuskers soon…Mike Riley and Nebraska AD Shawn Eichorst will find out who is in charge of things and who can send both of them packing!

After an 1 – 1 start to the season and a decent showing against the Oregon Ducks in Eugene Mike Riley and the Cornhuskers host Northern Illinois in Lincoln on Saturday in the Biggest MUST WIN Game of Riley’s tenure at Nebraska because if the Huskers lose this game at home to Northern Illinois things would heat up in a Helluva hurry on the Great Plains of America!

Oh here is what Nebraska has left after Northern Illinois:

Rutgers
At Illinois
Wisconsin
Ohio State
At Purdue
Northwestern
At Minnesota
At Penn State
Iowa

We have it on good authority that Nebraska fans are expecting 10+ wins in Mike Riley’s third season coaching the Cornhuskers and if you lose to Northern Illinois not only is 10+ wins out the window…..Hell there’s a good chance Nebraska has a hard time winning 8 games if you can’t beat the NIU Huskies at home!

Kevin Sumlin, Texas A&M vs. Louisiana – We don’t give the 23 point underdogs Louisiana much chance to beat Texas A&M on Saturday but if somehow the Ragin’ Cajuns did beat the Aggies at Kyle Field we feel confident in saying that Kevin Sumlin would be fired right after the game because if you can’t beat Louisiana in College Station in Week 2 there’s not a Damn chance in Hell you are going to beat Arkansas in Dallas in Week 3.

Yes…Louisiana is a MUST WIN Game for Kevin Sumlin and Texas A&M but it so unimaginable that the Aggies could lose this game that we should probably call this a….

You Better Damn Win Or Your Ass Will Be Fired Game for Kevin Sumlin!

Brian Kelly, Notre Dame vs. Boston College – As Bob Stoops proved earlier this year college football head coaches either leave of their own volition or their ass eventually gets fired and Brian Kelly at Notre Dame is now heading towards the latter category after a home loss to Georgia, an unnecessary tiff with a reporter after the game, and most important of all now sitting on a record of…

5 – 11

….in Notre Dame’s last 16 games which at a place like Notre Dame is a mark that should have already gotten Brian Kelly fired if the folks making the decisions in South Bend actually gave a Damn about Excellence and Winning!

The Notre Dame at Boston College on Saturday isn’t so much a MUST WIN Game for Brian Kelly as it is a…

Your Ass Better Not Lose It OR Your Head Coaching Career Is Good As Over

….game for Kelly because a loss in this spot to a BC team that under Steve Addazio in the last five seasons has posted an overall record of…

25 – 28

….would be beyond embarrassing and borderline….

“Why the Hell is Brian Kelly still the head coach of the Irish?”

….like moment!

An interesting number of Brian Kelly at Notre Dame over his 8 seasons at the school….the Irish have played 71 games against Power 5 Conference schools and Kelly’s record in those 71 games is…

42 – 29

….for a….

.592

….winning percentage in Power 5 Conference Games.

Is that Notre Dame Football?

Not only NO but…HELL NO!

Steve Addazio, Boston College vs. Notre Dame – As mentioned above Steve Addazio in his fifth season at Boston College and has posted an overall record of…

25 – 28

….which is Below Average at best and Addazio’s record in ACC Conference play is even worse at….

10 – 22

….and after starting the season with a win over Northern Illinois and BC getting its ass whipped by Wake Forest here come the Fighting Irish of Notre Dame in a match-up that is a…

Better Damn Win Game for both Coaches + Teams

…with the losing coach shooting up the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings and the winning coach leaving the game with his ass still on fire!

Great Luck to you Coaches Kelly and Addazio!

Larry Fedora, North Carolina vs. Old Dominion – After opening the season with homes losses to Cal and Louisville Larry Fedora has the North Carolina football team in a Helluva mess and his ass on the precipice of being launched onto the Hot Seat with a loss to Old Dominion on Saturday in a game that North Carolina just CANNOT LOSE forget about the entire MUST WIN Game situation for Fedora.

With Duke up next and then Georgia Tech Larry Fedora better Damn find a way to beat Old Dominion on Saturday or it will be….

Welcome to the Hot Seat Larry!

Barry Odom, Missouri vs. Purdue – Barry Odom has not exactly lit the woods on fire in his first two seasons as the head coach at Mizzou and after starting 1 – 1 in 2017 Odom has records on the board of…

Overall: 5 – 9

SEC: 2 – 7

….and the one thing that Odom does not need at this moment is a team that hasn’t been very good in recent years, think Purdue, that has a new head coach in Jeff Brohm who has the Boilermakers offense rolling and just might come into Columbia and hang 40+ points on the Tigers!

With games coming next against…

Auburn
At Kentucky
At Georgia

….before playing Idaho on October 21 the Mizzou Tigers could be….

1 – 5

….if they lost to Purdue on Saturday which would put Odom’s ass into orbiting the Sun HEAT territory so you better Damn beat Purdue Coach Odom!

Todd Graham, Arizona State vs. Texas Tech – We asked around a bit this week to our friends in the Phoenix area and the word on the street is Graham needs…

8 wins

…in 2017 to keep his job but might be able to return to coach in 2018 if Arizona State wins 7 games this season and those 7 wins include a win over Arizona. With that in mind with ASU now at 1 – 1 on the season and games left against….

At Texas Tech
Oregon
At Stanford
Washington
At Utah
USC
Colorado
At UCLA
At Oregon State
Arizona

….we don’t see any way that the Sun Devils get to 7 wins if they don’t beat Texas Tech on Saturday which = MUST WIN Game for Todd Graham and his football team!

Kliff Kingsbury, Texas Tech vs. Arizona State – In four-plus seasons as the head coach at Texas Tech Kliff Kingsbury has posted the very uninspiring records of…

Overall: 25 – 26

Big 12: 13 – 23

…which you would consider uninspiring if you give a Damn about the Red Raiders fielding a Winning Football Program which Hell…maybe the folks in Lubbock really don’t give a Damn about…but even if they do embrace being…

Totally Damn Average

…in Lubbock one would have to think that if Kingsbury doesn’t win at least 6 games in 2017 his ass is gone…right?

Who the Hell knows since Texas Football all across the Republic of Texas is So Damn Average these days!

Now at 1 – 0 on the season after beating Cupcake Eastern Washington in the opening game the Red Raiders really need to beat Arizona State at home in the second game with this schedule still remaining:

At Houston
Oklahoma State
At Kansas
At West Virginia
Iowa State
At Oklahoma
Kansas State
Baylor
TCU
At Texas

We really don’t see 6 wins on the Texas Tech schedule if they don’t beat Arizona State on Saturday so Yep…you got it…this is a MUST WIN Game for Kliff Kingsbury and the Red Raiders!

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Arizona, Arizona State, Barry Odom, Boston College, Brian Kelly, Bronco Mendenhall, Butch Jones, David Beaty, David Shaw, East Carolina, Florida, Gary Andersen, Jim McElwain, Jim Mora, Kansas, Kevin Sumlin, Kliff Kingsbury, Larry Fedora, Mark Whipple, Mike Riley, Missouri, Nebraska, North Carolina, Notre Dame, Oregon State, Rich Rodriguez, Scottie Montgomery, Stanford, Steve Addazio, Tennessee, Texas A&M, Texas Tech, Todd Graham, UCLA, UMass, Virginia

#16 Hot Seat Head Coach – Doug Martin, New Mexico State – #17 Hot Seat Head Coach – Sean Kugler, UTEP – #18 Hot Seat Head Coach – Kliff Kingsbury, Texas Tech

Harry May 2, 2017 0 Comments

#16 Hot Seat Head Coach – Doug Martin, New Mexico State

We are not quite sure what Doug Martin would have to do to get fired as the head coach at New Mexico State after four years on the job, but if the below records won’t get Martin fired…

2013: 2 – 10
2014: 2 – 10
2015: 3 – 9
2016: 3 – 9

Overall: 10 – 38

Sun Belt: 6 – 19

….we are thinking it would probably take Martin winning less than 2 games in 2017 AND burning down the Lobos football stadium to get his ass fired!

Doug Martin has coached 11 years as a FBS head coach at Kent State and New Mexico State now…not exactly two FBS power schools…and has an overall career record of…

39 – 91

…and if you do a little back of the envelope math that is losing and average of…

8.27

….football games a season and Hell…that is a Helluva lot of losing!

Since we haven’t a Damn clue what the expectations are for Doug Martin at New Mexico State let’s get to the Lobos 2017 schedule and see what is coming up on the horizon down Las Cruces way:

At Arizona State
At New Mexico
Troy
UTEP
At Arkansas
At Appalachian State
At Georgia Southern
Arkansas State
At Texas State
At La. Lafayette
Idaho
South Alabama

Geez….that’s a pretty tough schedule for Martin and the Lobos in 2017 and we had to guess it looks like another…

2 or 3 win

….outcome to 2017 is coming down the pike and barring Doug Martin burning down the Lobos football stadium even with only 2 or 3 wins this upcoming season Martin…amazingly….might just survive to coach the Lobos in 2018!

#17 Hot Seat Head Coach – Sean Kugler, UTEP

The expectations for UTEP football have never what someone would call “HIGH” but it seems to us that winning SIX games a season in Conference USA is a reasonable standard that the UTEP head football coach should meet every year, and that is a mark that Miners head coach Sean Kugler has missed the last two season and thus why Kugler finds his ass on the Hot Seat heading into 2017.

Let’s take a look at Sean Kugler’s FOUR seasons as the head coach at UTEP:

2013: 2 – 10
2014: 7 – 6
2015: 5 – 7
2016: 4 – 8

Overall: 18 – 31

CUSA: 11 – 21

Make that Sean Kugler has fallen below our standard of UTEP football winning SIX games a season in 3 of his 4 years on the job, and we have to think anything short of SIX wins in 2017 and Kugler will be heading his ass out of the West Texas Town of El Paso!

Let’s take a look at UTEP’s 2017 schedule:

At Oklahoma
Rice
Arizona
At New Mexico State
At Army
Western Kentucky
At Southern Miss
Texas San Antonio
At Middle Tennessee
At North Texas
La. Tech
At UAB

Now come on…we see No Damn Reason that a head football coach at UTEP in his FIFTH season on the job doesn’t win at least SIX games with the above schedule, and if Sean Kugler falls short of that SIX win mark then the UTEP job will probably be opening up coming early December.

How about a quick look back into time at the 1977 Sun Bowl in El Paso with the Stanford Cardinal whipping the LSU Bengal Tigers with Pat Summerall, Tom Brookshier and Burt Reynolds on the call!

#18 Hot Seat Head Coach – Kliff Kingsbury, Texas Tech

In our opinion here at Coaches Hot Seat the MOST disappointing coach on the FBS level of football in America that has been on the job for 4 years or more is no doubt….

Kliff Kingsbury

…at Texas Tech who opened in 2013 at Tech winning his first SEVEN games but since has posted a record over the past 3+ years of…

17 – 26

Let’s take a look at Kliff Kingsbury’s overall records at Texas Tech over the past 4 seasons:

2013: 8 – 5
2014: 4 – 8
2015: 7 – 6
2016: 5 – 7

Overall: 24 – 26

Big 12: 13 – 23

Man…that 13 – 23 record in Big 12 Conference play by Kingsbury which isn’t exactly a tough neighborhood to play football in anymore is ugly indeed, but even more shocking is Kingsbury’s record against FBS schools the last 4 years at Tech:

15 – 26

Geez….we just cannot imagine anyone at Texas Tech is going to tolerate Average to Pitiful Football to continue on in Lubbock for much longer which brings us to Texas Tech’s 2017 schedule, and one has to think that anything less than SIX wins and Kingsbury is done and Hell entering his FIFTH season in Lubbock anything less than EIGHT wins and his ass should probably be done!

Eastern Washington
Arizona State
At Houston
Oklahoma State
At Kansas
At West Virginia
Iowa State
At Oklahoma
Kansas State
Baylor
TCU
At Texas

With SIX home games and several very winnable games on the road along with one neutral site game against Baylor in our opinion anything less than SIX wins and Kliff Kingsbury should be fired shortly after Tech play Texas in Austin on November 24 and no doubt Kingsbury will be fired with anything less than SIX wins in 2017!

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Coaches Hot Seat, Coaches Hot Seat Rankings, Doug Martin, Kliff Kingsbury, New Mexico State, Sean Kugler, Texas Tech, UTEP

Post Week 3 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 1 – 10 Hot Seat Coaches – These Head Coaches Don’t Like To See the Man in Black but Give ‘em Hell anyway Johnny Cash!

Harry September 21, 2015 0 Comments

Amazingly Week 3 of the college football season is already in the books and the HEAT is being turned-up on college head coaches who have stumbled out of the gate or in some cases NEVER got out of the gate and with that REALITY let’s get to the…

Post Week 3 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 1 – 10 Hot Seat Coaches

These head coaches don’t like to see the Man in Black but Give ‘em Hell anyway Johnny Cash!

1. Paul Rhoads, Iowa State – With the Iowa State loss to Toledo on Saturday considering this stat for a second….

In Paul Rhoads last 30 games at Iowa State he has posted a record of:

7 – 23

In Paul Rhoads last 25 Big 12 games at Iowa State he has posted a record of:

4 – 21

Yep, that will land your ass on the No. 1 Hot Seat in the land and after a 1 – 2 start to the 2015 season the Cyclones get a week off before playing Kansas at home on October 3.

Iowa State can beat this Kansas team in the wake of the Complete Freaking Disaster left by that Dumbass Charlie Weis…right?

We sure the Hell hope so but how will Iowa State fare in its other 8 Big 12 conference games after they beat Kansas on October 3?

Hell if we know, but it looks like barring a Miracle in Corn Country Iowa State will be looking for a new head football coach come December!

2. Doug Martin, New Mexico State – Doug Martin is in his third season at New Mexico State and with the Aggies overtime loss to UTEP on Saturday Martin has posted a record in three seasons at NMSU of….

4 – 23

Enough said on Doug Martin’s Hot Seat situation at New Mexico State!

3. Darrell Hazell, Purdue – We here at Coaches Hot Seat fully expected Darrell Hazell’s Boilermakers to beat Virginia Tech at home on Saturday but instead the Hokies delivered a 51 – 24 beatdown of Purdue and now the 2015 season could turn into a Complete Freaking Disaster for Hazell with a very good Bowling Green team coming to town this coming Saturday.

A loss to Bowling Green and Purdue will start the season at…

1 – 3

…with 8 Big Ten games left to be played starting with a game at Michigan State on October 3 and for the life of us we believe if you can’t beat Virginia Tech or Bowling Green how in the Hell will Purdue win another game this season!

Oh, Darrell Hazell’s win/loss records in his third season at Purdue:

Overall: 5 – 22

Big Ten: 1 – 15

That’s BAD with a capital B!

4. Mike London, Virginia – After a few tense moments Mike London’s Virginia football team got its first win of the season over William & Mary on Saturday and now it’s back to Big Boy football in Week 4 with a game on Friday night against Boise State.

Now in his SIXTH season at Virginia Mike London has win/loss records on the board of…

Overall: 24 – 40

ACC: 11 – 29

…with ONE winning season out of FIVE and if UVA is going to post a winning season in 2015 we would recommend that they beat Boise State on Friday night!

By comparison the Virginia head coach that Mike London replaced and who was run out of Charlottesville on a rail…

Al Groh

…coached at UVA for NINE seasons posting FIVE winning seasons.

Yep…that reality will land your ass on the Hot Seat 100% of the time!

5. Bret Bielema, Arkansas – A few years ago a handful of Coaches Hot Seat members were having dinner with one of their college physics professors and one asked the professor about the following Albert Einstein quote:

CHS Member: “John…what did Einstein mean when he said…

“Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.”

College Physics Professor: “Ahhh…Albert…a very smart one he was. There is a scientific answer to what Einstein meant when he said, “Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one,” but remembering you boys’ grades in my class I will give you the layman’s answer!

Loud laughter at the table!

College Physics Professor: “What Einstein meant was that reality is nothing more and nothing less than how each of our brains perceives the world and the perceived reality for one person is often very different than the reality for almost everyone else on the Earth and thus one reality is very hard to define. In the end reality is just the perception created by the neurons firing off in each of our brains which human beings will naturally try to order towards their own individual particular world view.”

CHS Member: “So what you are saying is that reality…meaning a one reality for everyone no more exists than the Man on the Moon and that reality is different for each person based upon how their individual brain perceives the world?”

College Physics Professor: “Precisely, but then human beings because of their highly evolved brains look at the world around them and naturally want to order it, to organize it, to classify it, to put people and ideas into certain boxes, because that is what homo sapiens were forced to do over millions of years of evolution to survive and then thrive and with that you now not only understand what Einstein was saying but you can also grasp why perception plays such a huge role in daily human life. In the end we are what we perceive of the world, of other people, and of ourselves.”

Getting back to the Complete Freaking Disaster that is Bret Bielema’s REALITY right now after the Razorbacks loss to Texas Tech on Saturday the PERCEPTION at the end of the 2014 season was that Arkansas made some HUGE strides….but did they in FACT?

Let’s go Joe Friday and get to the FACTS on the State of Arkansas Football…Past…Present…and Future:

After a loss to Georgia on October 18, 2014 the Arkansas record stood at…

3 – 4

….and then the Razorbacks under Bret Bielema finished the season by doing this:

Beating UAB = No Big Whoop!

Losing to Mississippi State = Not Surprising

Beating a Collapsing LSU Team = No Big Whoop!

Beating a Demoralized Ole Miss Team =No Big Whoop!

Losing to Missouri = Not Surprising

Beating a Mediocre Texas Team in Bowl Game = No Big Whoop!

So the so-called BIG ending to the Razorbacks 2014 was in REALITY…

No Big Whoop!

…but the PERCEPTION was that Bret Bielema had “turned things around” at Arkansas when in REALITY nothing could be farther from the truth!

Let’s move ahead to the 2015 season for Arkansas which has started this way following an off-season of Bret Bielema and Arkansas AD Jeff Long telling anyone that would listen that Bielema was the second-coming of Paul “Bear” Bryant and that Ohio State was actually playing in something akin to the MAC instead of the Big Ten….in our opinion of course….

Beat UTEP = No Big Whoop!

Lost to Toledo = Hmmmm….Surprising….but NOT REALLY!

Lost to Texas Tech = Hmmmm…Even More Surprising…but NOT REALLY!

Oh, Bret Bielema’s record since supposedly things “turned around” at Arkansas after the loss to Georgia last season:

5 – 4

So the PERCEPTION until Toledo whipped Arkansas was that the Razorbacks were….BACK.…but the REALITY which is just now sinking into the heads of Arkansas fans who are thinking the Pig Farmer from Iowa might have pulled a fast one on them in the last year is that…

Arkansas is 1 – 2 and they play Texas A&M on Saturday in Dallas and the Aggies are….

6 Point Favorites!

Guess what?

If Arkansas loses to Texas A&M on Saturday with games at Tennessee and at Alabama on deck the REALITY is the Razorbacks could be sitting at…

1 – 5

….when Auburn comes to Fayetteville on October 24 in what could be the….

Ultimate Hot Seat vs. Hot Seat Coaching Match-Up with the Losing Coach being run out of town on the back of a hog!

Here’s the REALITY for Bret Bielema based upon the building PERCEPTION in Arkansas which we confirmed by talking to an Arkansas-alum friend of ours in Ft. Smith, Arkansas who could buy-and-sell everyone in the Fayetteville – Bentonville area except for the Walton clan and that REALITY is…

“If this season implodes both Bielema and AD Jeff Long might find themselves lucky to shoveling shit in West Texas as you boys like to say from time to time!”

Yep…that is the REALITY NOW in Arkansas folks!

On another note per our agreement with Texas Tech head coach Kliff Kingsbury since the Red Raiders beat the Razorbacks we will no longer be calling Coach Kingsbury….

“_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _”

Nice win there in Fayetteville Kliff!

6. Willie Taggart, South Florida – With the South Florida loss to Maryland on Saturday the Bulls dropped to…

1 – 2

…on the season and things don’t get any easier for Willie Taggart and his football team with this upcoming schedule:

Memphis
Syracuse
At UConn
SMU
At Navy
At East Carolina
Temple
Cincinnati
At UCF

Memo to Willie Taggart: IF your South Florida team plays the rest of the season the way it has played its first three games in 2015…

You might not win another game until you play hapless UCF on November 26 and Hell Furman beat UCF so go ahead and put that win over the Black Knights on the board!

Get off your ass Willie Taggart! Signed: Coaches Hot Seat

7. Gus Malzahn, Auburn – At the tail-end of the 2014 college football season we ran into an “old and former defensive coordinator in the SEC” at a restaurant in Atlanta and he said to us when the Auburn football program came up:

“The Gus Malzahn experiment in major college football is about to come to an end because what he and other coaches like Chip Kelly have been doing just cannot work unless they have an elite quarterback and neither Malzahn nor Kelly have that right now nor more than likely will they have that next season.”

We talked about the above statement for a few hours in the lobby of an Atlanta hotel and came to agreement on the idea that Malzahn and Kelly’s offenses depended on an elite quarterback who could make instant decisions on the fly but Auburn had Jeremy Johnson ready to play in 2015 and the Eagles had Nick Foles who wasn’t doing to bad at quarterback for the Eagles last season.

Guess what?

Jeremy Johnson is a Total Bust and Nick Foles is playing for the St. Louis Rams who was replaced by Sam Bradford who would be lucky to be a water boy on the Coaches Hot Seat Flag Football Team forget about playing QB and right now the…

Philadelphia Eagles

AND

Auburn Tigers

….are both a Complete Freaking Disaster!

Oh…another thing…neither the Philadelphia Eagles nor the Auburn Tigers are playing ANY defense so put that REALITY on top of everything else and truly….

Gus Malzahn is facing nothing short of what Gene Chizik faced in 2012 when Auburn went 3 – 9 and 0 – 8 in SEC play and was rightly run out of Auburn on a rail!

Let’s look at the rest of Auburn’s schedule with the Tigers now at 1 – 2 on the season realizing that…

Gus Malzahn is 2 – 6 in his last 8 games at Auburn

Guz Malzahn is 10 – 6 in his last 16 games at Auburn

Mississippi State
San Jose State
At Kentucky
At Arkansas
Ole Miss
At Texas A&M
Georgia
Idaho
Alabama

In our opinion if Auburn plays like they did against LSU the Tigers will be lucky to win…

3 Games in 2015

ANY SEC Games in 2015

What if Auburn finished at…

3 – 9 Overall

0 – 8 in the SEC

…in 2015 would Gus Malzahn be sent packing as Gene Chizik was sent packing only two seasons ago with the same record after winning a National Championship considering Malzahn didn’t win a National Title two seasons ago when he had the chance?

What’s Good for the Chizik is Good for the Malzahn….right?

RIGHT!

Who would Auburn AD Jay Jacobs hire to replace the run out of Auburn Gus Malzahn to coach the Tigers into the future?

Well, based upon the amount of money Auburn has been spending to build a strong football program on The Plains does anyone doubt that Jacobs would fly down to Tallahassee and offer Jimbo Fisher $8 Million A Year…”Nick Saban Money”….to be the next head football coach at Auburn?

Would Jimbo Fisher accept an offer to become the Auburn head coach at $8 Million A Year?

Does it get HOT on The Plains of southwest Alabama in the Summer?

That would be a BIG YES!

Memo to Gus Malzahn: Nice try against LSU to get the Auburn offense going with Jeremy Johnson but now Gus….Johnson would be lucky to be running the scout team for the Coaches Hot Seat Flag Football Team forget about being in the 1 – 5 QB slots so why in the Hell is he the starting QB at Auburn? Oh, what’s behind Johnson is even worse? OK…that makes sense!

Memo No. 2 to Gus Malzahn: If you lose to Mississippi State on Saturday here is how you will know on whether to contact a Realtor or not to put your house on the market:

If Auburn AD Jay Jacobs starts saying things like…

“I am becoming very concerned in our fundamental approach to the game.”

…put the house on the market immediately!

8. Charlie Strong, Texas – The most amazing thing about the Texas loss to California on Saturday wasn’t the missed extra point at the end of the game BUT that the Texas Longhorns…

YES the Freaking Texas Longhorns!

…had to come storming back to almost tie a team in the California Bears that over the past THREE football seasons had won NINE football games TOTAL!

That is the REALITY of how far the Texas football program has fallen since Mack Brown lost to Alabama in the 2009 – 2010 Bogus BCS National Title Game!

Since that loss to Alabama in the Rose Bowl in Pasadena in January 2010 Texas has posted a combined record under Mack Brown and Charlie Strong of….

37 – 30!

This is the Texas Longhorns we are talking about here and although we will readily admit there is No Joy in Coaches Hot Seat-Ville putting Charlie Strong on the Hot Seat who two Coaches Hot Seat members first met in the early 1990s when Charlie was on Steve Spurrier’s staff at Florida the TRUTH is Texas football right now is very simply…

A Complete Freaking Disaster

…and the sad REALITY is that if Oliver Luck had been the AD at Texas in 2013 instead of the Sorry Excuse for a Human Being Steve Patterson that right now…in our opinion….the head coach of the Texas Longhorns would be none other than…

Nick Saban

Guess what Texas fans….and this is just our opinion here at Coaches Hot Seat and is the FIRM opinion of the two Coaches Hot Seat members that traveled to Tuscaloosa for the Ole Miss – Alabama game on Saturday and who are still in Tuscaloosa on this early Monday morning…

If Texas is looking for a new head football coach in December Nick Saban would be Very Damn Interested in that job

….because unlike Alabama which is rebuilding job that is PAST DONE Texas is a Complete Freaking Disaster that needs a HERO to save it and again our opinion here at Coaches Hot Seat:

Nick Saban has ONE more Act in his life on this Earth which would be capped by winning….

National Titles at LSU, Alabama and Texas!

You heard it here first!

As for Charlie Strong whose Texas team is now at 1 – 2 on the season Big 12 Conference play begins this Saturday against Oklahoma State in Austin and to that we can only say…

Good Luck Charlie!

9. George O’Leary, UCF – The UCF loss to Furman on Saturday confirmed of what we saw of UCF when they played Stanford in Week 2…

UCF is average at best and hardly coached team at worst

….and we agree completely with the following from Victory Way: UCF Blog for the UCF Fans…

Time for George to go, Harry P. Nolan, Victory Way

Up next for the 0 – 3 UCF which is now hardly coached by George O’Leary in our opinion…

At South Carolina

….in a Hot Seat vs. Hot Seat Head Coaching Match-Up against the Ole’ Ball Coach!

Speaking of the Ole’ Ball Coach!

10. Steve Spurrier, South Carolina – In the spring of this year a few Coaches Hot Seat members were up in South Carolina playing golf in the Greenville area and ran into some South Carolina Gamecock fans who were asked about the status of Steve Spurrier who will be FOREVER be known at Coaches Hot Seat as the…

Ole’ Ball Coach

…and one of those South Carolina fans said the following:

“I heard that Spurrier wanted to retire at the end of last season but that some folks got to him about all the other coaches that would be out of job if he retired and the Steve reluctantly decided to come back and coach in 2015 and see how things would turn out.”

Sorry….head coaches should not be staying in jobs to keep their assistant coaches and especially their sons employed and no matter what Steve Spurrier has done at South Carolina in the past in case the folks in South Carolina don’t know it the Gamecocks head coaching job is not something akin to the modern day Roman Empire or the USSR where the leaders get to hang around for as long as they want but instead South Carolina is in America and in America…

When you quit performing in your job…you get fired!

That’s how it is for most hard-working Americans making $50,000 or less a year and for Damn sure that is how it should be for football coaches making Millions of Dollars a year!

Steve Spurrier has no Damn “right” to stay as the head coach at South Carolina for as long as he wants but instead the people paying the bills….

The alums, boosters and fans of South Carolina

…will decide when Steve Spurrier will no longer be the head coach at USC unless of course the Ole’ Ball Coach decides first which based upon South Carolina’s remaining games in 2015 as detailed below will be the way this Shakespearean tragedy in Columbia will end later this year:

UCF
At Missouri
LSU
Vanderbilt
At Texas A&M
At Tennessee
Florida
The Citadel
Clemson

Anyone else thinking that the Ole’ Ball Coach and South Carolina will…

Win maybe….3 more games this season….before they play Clemson at home on November 28 in what will more than likely be the last game with the Ole’ Ball Coach on the sideline in his legendary playing and coaching career?

Anyone else thinking South Carolina will beat Clemson and send Steve Spurrier out a winner and that the next day Steve will be playing golf in Florida?

Thought so!

What is that monologue from William Shakespeare’s As You Like It, Act Two – Scene Seven, that for some reason fits in this spot when considering the playing and coaching career of the Great Steve Spurrier? Oh…here it is:

“All the world’s a stage,

And all the men and women merely players;
They have their exits and their entrances,
And one man in his time plays many parts,
His acts being seven ages. At first the infant,
Mewling and puking in the nurse’s arms.
Then, the whining school-boy with his satchel
And shining morning face, creeping like snail
Unwillingly to school. And then the lover,
Sighing like furnace, with a woeful ballad
Made to his mistress’ eyebrow. Then, a soldier,
Full of strange oaths, and bearded like the pard,
Jealous in honour, sudden, and quick in quarrel,
Seeking the bubble reputation
Even in the cannon’s mouth. And then, the justice,
In fair round belly, with a good capon lined,
With eyes severe, and beard of formal cut,
Full of wise saws, and modern instances,
And so he plays his part. The sixth age shifts
Into the lean and slippered pantaloon,
With spectacles on nose and pouch on side,
His youthful hose, well saved, a world too wide
For his shrunk shank, and his big manly voice,
Turning again toward childish treble, pipes
And whistles in his sound. Last scene of all,
That ends this strange eventful history,
Is second childishness and mere oblivion,

Sans teeth, sans eyes, sans taste, sans everything.”

Thank You Coach Spurrier…now have a Helluva Fun time in these last NINE football games Ole’ Ball Coach!

Post Week 3 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 11 – 30 Hot Seat Coaches Analysis coming soon!

Documentary – In Search of Shakespeare 1: A Time of Revolution from technology freak on Vimeo.

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Al Groh, Alabama, Albert Einstein, Arkansas, Auburn, Bret Bielema, Charlie Strong, Darrell Hazell, Doug Martin, FSU, George O'Leary, Gus Malzahn, Iowa State, Jay Jacobs, Jeff Long, Jimbo Fisher, Kliff Kingsbury, Mike London, New Mexico State, Nick Saban, Paul Rhoads, Purdue, South Carolina, South Florida, Steve Spurrier, Texas, Texas Tech, UCF, Virginia, Willie Taggart

Post Week 2 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 21 – 30 Hot Seat Coaches – Keep Giving These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

Harry September 15, 2015 0 Comments

Keep Giving These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Mr. Cash!

Post Week 2 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

21. David Shaw, Stanford – As a dozen or so Coaches Hot Seat members sat in Stanford Stadium on Saturday night watching Stanford whip Hapless and it seemed almost Coachless UCF an interesting observation was made by one CHS member:

“Is it just me or do the Stanford football players seem to going back to the size physically they were (which was puny) when Walt Harris was run off The Farm and replaced with Jim Harbaugh in 2007?”

This idea that the Stanford football players are getting increasingly smaller under head coach David Shaw compared to the size they were under Jim Harbaugh and in the first couple of years of the Shaw reign has been a topic of hushed discussion for over a year now among a small group of Coaches Hot Seat members which blew-up into a wide ranging discussion on Saturday night with lots of comments thrown in from the peanut gallery like…..

“How small the Stanford football players seemed at fan day in August. Hell, my boy in the ninth grade was bigger than half the Stanford team!”

“How it seems the Stanford football players are losing rather than gaining weight year-over year under David Shaw.”

“Doesn’t it seem like the Stanford football players are less cut, less in shape looking and overall not in the condition they were in during the Jim Harbaugh years?”

What was the final conclusion to this discussion you ask among the participating Coaches Hot Seat members which included a couple of CHS Members chiming-in from their hotel room in Knoxville, Tennessee?

Stanford football IS GETTING SMALLER and LESS PHYSICAL overall under David Shaw and all it takes for one to understand this FACT is for anyone to watch a tape of the Northwestern game from this season to see a smaller team in Northwestern push Stanford around all over the field on the way to a 16 – 6 win over the Cardinal.

Of course, the proof is ALWAYS in the pudding as someone once said and this week Stanford plays at USC which has ALWAYS had larger and stronger players across the board than Stanford but for a few seasons during the Jim Harbaugh years there was a time when USC was flat-out…

Intimidated by Stanford Football

….which culminated in 2009 Stanford – USC game at the LA Coliseum when the Cardinal led Jim Harbaugh team CRUSHED the Trojans by the score of…

55 – 21!

Unfortunately USC has won the last two games in the Stanford – USC series and it will be fascinating to see what the Trojans are able to do with Stanford at the LA Coliseum on Saturday in Steve Sarkisian’s second year as the head coach at USC after narrowly beating the Cardinal 13 – 10 last season on The Farm.

Will Stanford get pushed around by a team in USC that has five to six times as much talent as Northwestern which thoroughly dominated Stanford in the first game of the season or is there something…..anything….that David Shaw can do to get the Cardinal offense on track before the Pac-12 schedule really cranks up with several teams on the schedule that can easily score 30 or more points a game which would leave the pitiful Stanford offense in the dust?

We shall all see on Saturday night with a decent amount of Coaches Hot Seat members traveling to Los Angeles for the Stanford – USC game at one of our favorite venues to watch football games the LA Coliseum which a few Coaches Hot Seat members have been watching football games at for almost 40 years now. Needless to say with the remaining games on Stanford’s schedule as listed below…

At USC
At Oregon State
Arizona
UCLA
Washington
At Washington State
At Colorado
Oregon
California
Notre Dame

….there is a REAL chance that Stanford does NOT win 6 games in 2015 if they play like they did against Northwestern and of course if Stanford doesn’t win 6 games in 2015 Stanford WILL be looking for a new head football coach come December for Damn sure!

22. Curtis Johnson, Tulane – Curtis Johnson is now in his fourth season coaching the Tulane Green Wave and has posted win/loss records of…

Overall: 12 – 27

CUSA: 9 – 15

….with ONE winning season and bowl game in the books in his first three seasons.

Is Tulane the kind of place that should expect to be playing .500 or better football on a regular basis?

We sure the Hell don’t know why not and after Tulane started the 2015 season with losses to Duke and Georgia Tech the Green Wave has these games left on the schedule:

Maine
UCF
At Temple
Houston
At Navy
At Memphis
UConn
At Army
At SMU
Tulsa

Hmmm…..with the above games remaining is there anyone that believes Tulane will win at least 6 games in 2015?

Didn’t think so which takes us to…

Coach up your team Curtis Johnson or the Hot Seat will just get HOTTER!

23. Kliff Kingsbury, Texas Tech – What a PERFECT opportunity Saturday is for…

Pretty Boy Kingsbury

….to both get Coaches Hot Seat off his back, have us drop the Pretty Boy Kingsbury moniker FOREVER, and get a win for Texas Tech football when the Red Raiders travel to Fayetteville on Saturday to play an Arkansas team that is coming off a loss to Toledo and is according to our buddies in Ft. Smith, Arkansas…

In Total and Complete Disarray Right Now

….with people in Fayetteville pointing fingers at who was responsible for the Toledo loss and therein lies the…

PERFECT opportunity for Pretty Boy Kingsbury and his Red Raiders!

Can Texas Tech really go into Fayetteville and beat an Arkansas team coached by someone (Bret “Ohio State LOVES THEIR CUPCAKES” Bielema) who it seems is more interested in who Ohio State is playing each week (Northern Illinois) than in getting his team ready to play football games?

YES is that answer to that question and a loss in this spot for Bret Bielema to Texas Tech would not only get Pretty Boy Kingsbury OFF the Hot Seat it would send Bret “Anyone seen Urban Meyer eating CUPCAKES today” Bielema into a close orbit around the Sun for the foreseeable future with the SEC Conference schedule still ahead!

Memo to Pretty Boy Kingsbury: If you score 35 points in this game you will beat Arkansas and YES if you beat Arkansas on Saturday we will drop the Pretty Boy Kingsbury moniker FOREVER! Signed: Coaches Hot Seat

Good Luck Pretty Boy!

24. Les Miles, LSU – With wins over Mississippi State AND Auburn Les Miles has an opportunity to go from the frying pan to the catbird seat if LSU can get a win over a Totally Hapless Auburn team in Baton Rouge on Saturday and consider this for a moment that IF LSU can beat Auburn the Tigers will then have the below games left on their schedule before they play at Alabama on November 7:

At Syracuse
Eastern Michigan
At South Carolina
Florida
Western Kentucky

Hell, if LSU can beat Mississippi State and Auburn we see no reason why LSU can’t roll through their next FIVE games and show up in Tuscaloosa on November 7 at….

7 – 0

….to play the Crimson Tide BUT hold it just a second…after Alabama the Tigers still have to play…

Arkansas
At Ole Miss
Texas A&M

….so even if LSU was 7 – 0 on November 7 Les Miles could still lose his last 4 games and end the 2015 season at…

7 – 4

….and rightfully get his ass run out of Baton Rouge come December!

Up first though before Les Miles possibly gets his ass run out of Baton Rouge in December is the Auburn Tigers in Tiger Stadium and don’t tell anyone Les because what we are about to tell you is just between you Les and us here at Coaches Hot Seat:

Coaches Hot Seat whispering through the computer to Les Miles: “Our contact at Auburn tells us the Auburn coaching staff is in full-on panic mode right now because they know and Gus Malzahn knows that if Auburn loses to LSU on Saturday and Malzahn drops to 10 – 7 in his last 17 games that Malzahn’s ass will be on fire and on the Hot Seat!”

Good Luck Mad Hatter and OH…if you lose to Auburn at home in Tiger Stadium when Auburn is in “full-on panic mode” your precious ass will be climbing back up the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings!

25. Dana Holgorsen, West Virginia – Dana Holgorsen and West Virginia got their CUPCAKE win on Saturday over Liberty University which is where that Total Nutcake Bernie Sanders was speaking on Monday but we will say about Bernie Sanders that even though he is a Total Nutcake at least he is a Total Nutcake with personal principles that he sticks to whether you disagree with him or not!

Getting back to Dana Holgorsen and West Virginia Crazy Boy Holgorsen has a chance to get his ass off the Hot Seat next week with a win against Maryland at home on September 26 which would be nice since WVU travels to play at Oklahoma in their fourth game of the season after the Terps come to Morgantown.

For now though with West Virginia having an off-week Crazy Boy Dana Holgorsen remains on the Hot Seat right where Crazy Boy belongs!

26. Kirk Ferentz, Iowa – Kirk Ferentz and Iowa got a nice win at Iowa State on Saturday but then…

Iowa State has LOST 21 of their last 26 games

…so beating Iowa State is akin to beating a Ladies Senior Citizen Bridge Club’s auxiliary football team that meets on every Tuesday night in a suburb of Des Moines, Iowa so we hope that fans of Iowa football aren’t getting too confident after a win over the Cyclones especially with Pitt coming to town on Saturday.

We will tell everyone why a loss to Pitt on Saturday would be especially devastating to Kirk Ferentz and Iowa:

Pat Narduzzi is in his first year as a head coach at Pitt or as a head coach anywhere and if Pat Narduzzi can in his third game as a head coach roll into Iowa and beat the Hawkeyes on the road where exactly does that leave Iowa football under Kirk Ferentz?

Right in the septic tank on the farm is where that leaves Iowa football under Kirk Ferentz!

27. Mike Riley, Nebraska – Several Coaches Hot Seat members have been traveling to the Great State of Nebraska for over two decades on business and thus we have had a long love affair going with Nebraska and the Good People of that state and even when we put Mike Riley on the Hot Seat we have done so reluctantly since Mike Riley is a lot like the Good People of Nebraska in that Riley is almost…

Impossible NOT to like

….but this is Coaches Hot Seat and when you are the head coach at Nebraska you have to win “X” number of games to stay OFF the Hot Seat and thus why this Saturday’s game at Miami is so Damn important for Mike Riley and Nebraska football as they head towards Big Ten Conference play.

Of course, this Nebraska – Miami game is also very important for Hurricanes head coach Al Golden and thus we have set-up here in South Florida a..

Hot Seat vs. Hot Seat Coaching Match-Up

….with the winning coach getting his ass off the Hot Seat for now and the losing coaching getting the heat turned up on his ass Come Monday….

….and no doubt many times in the future during the rest of this college football season as well.

Good Luck to Mike Riley and Al Golden in this Hot Seat vs. Hot Seat Coaches game!

28. Mike MacIntyre, Colorado – Mike MacIntyre and Colorado got a nice win over UMass at home in Boulder on Saturday and now the Buffs face a CRITICAL game against Colorado State on Saturday which is a match-up that Colorado MUST WIN with the Pac-12 conference schedule looming over their shoulders and with the first Pac-12 game against Oregon in Boulder on October 3.

Can Colorado beat Colorado State on Saturday to get Mike MacIntyre off to a 2 – 1 start with Nicholls State up next which should be 3 – 1 before the Buffs start Pac-12 play against Oregon on October 3?

We don’t see why the Hell not!

29. Larry Fedora, North Carolina – Larry Fedora and North Carolina got a win over CUPCAKE North Carolina A&T on Saturday and now getting back to Big Boy College Football UNC will host Illinois on Saturday in Chapel Hill which is being coached by interim head coach Bill Cubit.

Yep…North Carolina CANNOT lose to this Illinois team that was in Complete and Total Disarray just a few weeks ago because a loss in this spot to drop to 1 – 2 with the below schedule still looming…

Delaware
At Georgia Tech
Wake Forest
Virginia
At Pitt
Duke
Miami
At Virginia Tech
NC State

…would put both Fedora and the Tar Heels in a precarious position as ACC Conference play gets underway on October 3 with a game at Georgia Tech.

Memo to SPF which is short for Six Pack Fedora here at Coaches Hot Seat: DO NOT LOSE TO Illinois! Signed: Coaches Hot Seat

30. Frank Beamer, Virginia Tech – Frank Beamer and the Hokies loaded-up on a CUPCAKE this past Saturday with a win over Furman and now it is back to reality for Virginia Tech with a game at Purdue in Week 3 in what is for Damn sure…

A MUST WIN Game for Frank Beamer and Virginia Tech

….because a loss in this spot to a Purdue football team that has won FIVE total football games the past three seasons would be nothing short of a Complete Freaking Disaster and fully reveal the current….

Hapless State of Virginia Tech Football

….which in what may be Frank Beamer’s last season in Blacksburg is certainly something that Coach Beamer does not want to be fully revealed for all the world to see.

With a game at East Carolina in Week 4 a loss to Purdue might just lead to the Hokies starting the 2015 season at…

1 – 3

….and fighting for their lives just to get to a pitiful bowl game and is a mediocre season and pitiful bowl game really how Frank Beamer wants to go out at Virginia Tech after a legendary coaching career?

NO is the answer to that question and thus YES Virginia Tech had better Damn beat Purdue!

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Al Golden Miami, Arkansas, Bret Bielema, Curtis Johnson, Dana Holgorsen, David Shaw, Frank Beamer, Iowa, Jim Harbaugh, Kirk Ferentz, Kliff Kingsbury, Larry Fedora, Les Miles, LSU, Mike Riley, Nebraska, North Carolina, Stanford, Steve Sarkisian, Texas Tech, Tulane, USC, Virginia Tech, West Virginia

Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 11 – 20 Hot Seat Coaches – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

Harry September 8, 2015 0 Comments

Give these Hot Seat Coaches Hell Mr. Cash!

Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

11. Paul Petrino, Idaho – Now in his third season at Idaho head coach Paul Petrino has posted a record of…

2 – 22

…which includes an opening 2015 season loss to Ohio by a score of 45 – 28.

YES…2 – 22 will land your ass on the Hot Seat and that is exactly where Paul Petrino is at and has been for years now!

12. Ron Turner, Florida International – We are not quite sure how FIU beat UCF in Orlando on Thursday…more on George O’Leary who is now on the Hot Seat due to the loss to FIU in a bit…but a win is a win and a win over UCF moves Ron Turner down the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings BUT if Turner is going to get off the Hot Seat for good he will need more than 4 wins in 2015 and HELL if you can beat UCF in Orlando you can beat a pitiful Indiana team in Bloomington this coming Saturday….right?

RIGHT!

13. David Shaw, Stanford – Dozens of Coaches Hot Seat members were in the San Francisco Bay area and around Stanford University for work and various professional educational things in August so many of us were able to take-in and size-up the Stanford football August preseason camp and by the third week of August a consensus had been reached that we came very close to publishing in the Coaches Hot Seat Blog that we held back on because….WELL….maybe we were wrong and why send out alarms to Stanford’s first opponent Northwestern about potential problems with Stanford football so we kept our mouths shut.

After seeing in person and watching on TV the Stanford – Northwestern game this past Saturday we can now say….

WE WERE NOT WRONG!

….about the Complete Freaking Disaster that we were watching unfold in August on The Farm which has led to the…

Complete Freaking Disaster that is Stanford Football right now!

Let’s quickly summarize what several Coaches Hot Seat members saw in August with Stanford football by quoting a CHS Member on what he thought of the Cardinal’s August camp practices:

“If you held all of Stanford’s August football practices in a balsa wood house not only would the balsa wood house still be standing there would not be one dent in any of the balsa wood!”

What the Hell does the above mean exactly?

Stanford Football NO LONGER PLAYS FOOTBALL under head coach David Shaw but rather Shaw just holds pillow fights among the players so the…

Candy Ass Coaches and Candy Ass Players can act like they are football players when in FACT

….any random sorority football team from any university in the country could whip the Hell out of the….

Candy Ass Coaches and Candy Ass Players that call themselves Stanford Football!

On top of Stanford Football players being Candy Asses that are coached by Candy Asses did anyone else catch the Stanford offense against Northwestern?

Got there are Thousands of Pee Wee football teams across America that not only hit harder but are better coached and more sophisticated than the Stanford offense right now?

What a Complete Freaking Joke Stanford Football is right now and in our opinion the current state of Stanford Football goes straight to the head coach David Shaw who also in our opinion…

Wouldn’t know an honest day’s work if it hit him in the ass!

No David Shaw…sitting in your office listening to jazz music is NOT working IF you are the head coach of the Stanford football team which by the way you have turned into the…

Biggest Group of Candy Asses in the American Republic today!

Congratulations David Shaw you should be Mighty Damn Proud of Yourself because you are going to do the Next Too Damn Impossible….

Be handed a championship football program from Jim Harbaugh and less than three years later be now sitting on a record over your last 15 games of…

8 – 7

….and headed towards getting your precious jazz listening ass run right off The Farm!

Up next for the Candy Asses in Cardinal:

UCF this coming Saturday on The Farm which just lost to FIU at home!

Here’s a thought:

The Stanford football coaches and players should all get in their best Sunday dresses out and find some nice pillows from the nearby Macy’s at the Stanford Shopping Center for the UCF game and do what they best and love so very much in style…

Have a Pillow Fight!

Fear the Tree? No…not any longer on The Farm!

Fear the Pillows being swung by the Candy Ass Coaches and Players on the Stanford NOT A Football Team anymore!

14. Les Miles, LSU – Let’s give the award…

Thank God Almighty that those Idiots weren’t around during World War II

…to the LSU athletic department that could not find a way to move a game one day forward to Sunday after the McNeese State – LSU game was cancelled on Saturday which lots of…

Flunky Paper Pushers in the LSU Athletic Department

….couldn’t somehow do who no doubt would be selling apples on the local street corner if they weren’t working in athletics where morons can hang around forever whether they are actually good at their jobs or not who and couldn’t just say this simple Damn thing:

“Sorry Folks….the McNeese State – LSU game is cancelled…see everyone back here at Tiger Stadium tomorrow for a 5PM for kick-off.”

Would the above had meant that the McNeese State football team would have driven the 130 miles back to their campus in Lake Charles to spend the night and driven back to Baton Rouge on Sunday for the game?

YES….Big Freaking Deal!

Would the above have meant that LSU Athletics would have spent a few extra hundred thousand dollars in overtime for people working in and around Tiger Stadium?

YES…Big Freaking Deal!

Would the above have meant that LSU athletic administrators otherwise known as Precious Candy Ass Paper Pushers would have had to do some extra work over the weekend?

YES…Big Freaking Deal!

Bottom-Line: LSU Athletics is run by Complete Freaking Morons that cannot move a football game…..A Freaking Football Game…one day forward!

YES…it is true…there are Complete Freaking Morons in position of authority all over America right now and LSU Athletics is a prime example of that FACT!

Getting back to Les Miles the LSU Tigers now open the season at Mississippi State and if Les Miles’ football team loses that game…

Expect your ass to be the temperature in the Bayou on a HOT August Day Les Miles!

15. Kliff Kingsbury, Texas Tech – PBK’s….Pretty Boy Kingsbury…football team at Texas Tech got a 59 – 45 win over FCS team Sam Houston in Week 1 which means about as much as a grain of sand being washed into the ocean and in Week 2 the Red Raiders play UTEP at home in a game that very simply…

PBK…Pretty Boy Kingsbury….CANNOT LOSE

….with Arkansas in Week 3.

Oh…Arkansas beat UTEP in Week 1 by the score of 48 – 13 so everyone here at Coaches Hot Seat will be watching this UTEP – Texas Tech game and score very closely!

Good Luck to you PBK!

16. Steve Sarkisian, USC – USC whipped an overmatched Arkansas State team in Week 1 and the Trojans play a very weak Idaho team in Week 2 and then USC gets…

The Balsa Wood Candy Ass Pillow Fight Boys of Stanford in Week 3

….so USC should EASILY be 3 – 0 when they head to play Arizona State in Tempe on September 26.

As for Steve Sarkisian and his recent “troubles” we can only say to Steve….

Focus on Family and Football Steve and keep the Focus there….PERIOD.

17. Larry Fedora, North Carolina – North Carolina looked better…especially the UNC defense under Gene Chizik…than the Tar Heels looked in 2014 BUT the OLD Ball Coach’s South Carolina team looked AVERAGE at best so was UNC’s performance against the Gamecocks something to be impressed with or just….whatever?

In our opinion….WHATEVER….because there are probably some high schools team in the South that could whip the South Carolina team that the OLD Ball Coach ran out onto the field in Charlotte!

Coming up for Larry Fedora and North Carolina:

NC A&T
Illinois
Delaware

Hell…North Carolina SHOULD be…

3 – 1

…when go to Atlanta to play Georgia Tech on October 3!

If not…Larry Fedora knows where he will be….no NOT on the beach with is shirt off wowing the ladies and looking for someone that will take a picture of him but rather….

On the FREAKING HOT SEAT!

18. Kirk Ferentz, Iowa – It’s not just the Iowa football team that is a Complete Freaking Disaster at the University of Iowa after reading about who Iowa just hired as the new president of the school….

Rocky Start for University of Iowa President, Rekha Basu, Des Moines Register

“Less than 2 percent of the faculty thinks J. Bruce Harreld is qualified to be the University of Iowa’s next president; among the college community at large, it’s 2.6 percent. By contrast, more than 90 percent of respondents to a campus survey gave high ratings to the other three finalists.

Nonetheless, Harreld was named UI’s 21st president Thursday in a unanimous vote from the Iowa Board of Regents. In so doing, they chose a former business executive with no experience in university administration, whose resume lists as his present employer a company he has since acknowledged no longer exists.

Harreld has also admitted he’ll have a steep learning curve for the job, and that his “unusual background” will mean he’ll need a lot of teaching, coaching and mentoring from those who criticized him. It’s good he acknowledged that, and gracious to extend the olive branch. But considering he’ll earn $590,000, plus $200,000 annually in deferred compensation, on-the-job training shouldn’t be necessary.”

What in the Freaking Hell?

Of course, the Iowa regents hiring this Buffoon as the new University of Iowa president makes the school paying football coach Kirk Ferentz $4 Million Dollars a year make sense….well…NOTHING can make paying Kirk Ferentz all that money for mediocrity make sense which brings us to the…

$4 Million Dollar Man Kirk Ferentz

…who over the last five seasons while earning around $20 Million Dollars has posted records of…

Overall: 34 – 30

Big Ten: 19 – 21

…which is a good gig if you can’t be the president of the University of Iowa who it seems is NOT qualified for the job while hauling down almost $800K a year!

Anyone else starting to notice a pattern here at the University of Iowa and if so what does that pattern mean?

We don’t know the exact answer to that question but there are plenty of people here at Coaches Hot Seat that are NOT qualified for lots of jobs at the University of Iowa that make six-figures a year and if we can just get to the right person in Iowa no doubt we will be hired in a Helluva hurry…and kept around whether we FAIL at our jobs or not!

Who is dumber….the folks at LSU that can’t move a football game one day forward or the folks at Iowa that pay a football coach millions of dollars for mediocrity and just hired a president that in our opinion that doesn’t know his ass from the side of a barn when it comes to run a major state university?

It’s Iowa by an eyelash!

The N-O Man: The University of Iowa’s new president has no experience, no ideas, and flubbed his own resume, Kembrew McLeod, Slate.com

Oh, these are just Complete Freaking Idiots at the University of Iowa!

19. Mike MacIntyre, Colorado – As we said last week in the Preseason Coaches Hot Seat Ranking Analysis we were hoping for a…

Herculean Effort

…by Mike MacIntyre and the Colorado Buffs in 2015 and what in the Hell did the CU Buffs do in the first game against Hawaii?

The CU Buffs looked like Complete Freaking Buffoons at the opening of the game against the Warriors and it really looked like the head coach and coaching staff showed up at the first game on the sideline without coaching during August camp at all!

Geez….Mike MacIntyre…what in the Hell is going on in Boulder son?

Our recommendation for Colorado head coach Mike MacIntyre: Get things fixed with your football team this week against UMass because if you lose that Week 3 game to Colorado State which has a first-year head coach in Mike Bobo the rest of the 2015 football season could turn into a Complete Freaking Disaster especially with the Oregon Ducks coming to town on October 3.

If Colorado somehow lost to UMass this Saturday in Boulder Mike MacIntyre and the entire CU coaching staff should be fired before they leave the field and a local high school staff should be hired to coach the rest of the season!

Memo to Mike MacIntyre: Get Off Your Ass Son!

20. Mike Leach, Washington State – Really Mike Leach?

Lose to Portland State in the home opening game in Pullman?

Really Mike Leach?

Your Football Team looked like SHIT on Saturday Mike Leach and since we know you can coach we can only draw ONE conclusion after that pitiful loss to Portland State:

Mike Leach just no longer gives a SHIT because his Washington State football team now plays like SHIT!

In Mike Leach’s last 15 football games at Washington State the Cougars are…

3 – 12

…and those 3 wins last season were over….

Portland State
Utah
Oregon State

Oh…Portland State and Oregon State had losing records last year so in the last 15 games Mike Leach has beaten…

1 Team with a winning record

…and anyone that recalls the Washington State – Utah game from last season knows it took a miracle for the Cougars to win that game!

What is going on at Washington State exactly with Mike Leach?

Well…it’s just our opinion…but Mike Leach was always a terrible fit for Pullman, Washington because look at where Mike Leach was living when he could live anywhere he wanted to live…

Key West, Florida

Still…Mike Leach won a lot of football games at Texas Tech in Lubbock, Texas which isn’t Key West, Florida either so there really is no excuse for Mike Leach to be losing to Portland State in the first game of this third season at Washington State so then just what in the Hell is going on in Pullman?

We think we know BUT we are going to hold our tongue and watch and see IF…

Mike Leach and Washington State just flat out QUIT in 2015 after the opening season loss OR if they come back strong this week in a very tough game at Rutgers.

Your choice Mike Leach and Washington State BUT if Mike Leach does fail at Washington State he will be remembered as…

The Football Coach that got run out of Lubbock

AND

The Football Coach that QUIT in Pullman

Great thing is Mike Leach will be able to determine how this story ends and if it ends badly whether we like Mike Leach or not if the current trend continues in Pullman we will light Mike Leach’s ass up!

Is everyone reading the Coaches Hot Seat Blog starting to understand that we are TOUGHEST on the people we expect the most from?

That’s way ALL alumni and fans should be….don’t accept anything less than…

EXCELLENCE

…and you have a Helluva lot better chance of actually getting…

EXCELLENCE!

21 – 30 Post Week Hot Seat Coaches Analysis Coming Soon!

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Candy Asses, Coaches Hot Seat, Coaches Hot Seat Rankings, Colorado, David Shaw, Florida International, Idaho, Iowa, Kirk Ferentz, Kliff Kingsbury, Les Miles, LSU, Mike Leach, Mike MacIntyre, Paul Petrino, Pillow Fight, Ron Turner, Stanford, Steve Sarkisian, Texas Tech, USC, Washington State