2017 Post Week 6 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – Tom Petty + Stevie Nicks Learning To Fly – Thanks Tom and Godspeed Son! – Johnny Cash Giving The Hot Seat Coaches Hell! – Welcome To The Hot Seat Lincoln Riley…Head Coach of the Charmin Very Damn Soft Oklahoma Sooners!
We can’t start Week 7 of the 2017 College Football Season without first recognizing the passing of the Great Tom Petty who was always teaching us how to fly in life!
Learning To Fly, Tom Petty and his 40+ year friend Stevie Nicks!
Thank You Tom for your amazing music and God Speed To You Son…Your Music Will Live Forever!
Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!
Thank You Mr. Cash!
1. Bret Bielema, Arkansas – In the last decade-plus we have written a lot in this Coaches Hot Seat Blog about the importance of Athletic Directors making Damn sure they hire head football coaches that “fit” the culture and history of the school the AD words for, but this is the first time we have written about something just as important:
Coaches taking jobs where they “fit” the culture and history of the school.
A handful of Coaches Hot Seat members have stopped in at Madison, Wisconsin a few times while on business trips in the Great State of Wisconsin and even been to a couple Wisconsin Badgers football games and on one of those trips a few years ago when Bret Bielema was still the head coach of the Badgers there was a story we read about how Bielema liked to drive around in his SUV on Gameday Saturdays in Madison before the games to see what all the Wisconsin fans were up to with most of those fans not knowing it was the UW head coach in that SUV. When reading that story we just laughed at it because it was classic Bret Bielema and in our minds not knowing about any potential issues that were going on between Wisconsin AD Barry Alvarez and Bret Bielema we always thought that Bret was a good “fit” at Wisconsin and that he would be there until he got his ass fired or he retired.
As you can imagine with the above in mind everyone at Coaches Hot Seat was shocked when in early December 2012 it was announced that Bret Bielema was leaving Wisconsin for the Arkansas head coaching job which made no sense on many levels and like a lot of other people made us think that Barry Alvarez must be one Helluva asshole to work for and if the media reports are true Cheap As Hell when it comes to paying Wisconsin assistant coaches since after all…Not A Damn Dime of the money that Barry Alvarez pays Wisconsin Athletic Department employees with is Barry’s money! Whatever the issues were between Alvarez and Bielema it blew-up a pretty good arrangement for the both of them which later happened again with Alvarez and current Oregon State head coach Gary Andersen who also must be a Real American Man and doesn’t like being led around by the nose from a former football coach who doesn’t seem to know that Real Leaders hire people to do jobs and they…
Let Them Do Their Job!
Leaving Barry Alvarez aside for the moment who in our opinion is a Pompous Arrogant Ass that believes he spun up the entire universe and thus everyone should kiss Barry’s Precious Big Ass….Sorry Barry but your are not God Son and hopefully one day the Lord himself will let you know that personally….let’s get back to Bret Bielema at Arkansas which on so many levels for both Arkansas and Bielema made just no Damn sense and we write that because early on a long-time friend + Arkansas-alum called us in Bielema’s first year at Arkansas in the Fall of 2013 and said something like (paraphrasing since it was so long ago):
“It’s just not going to work with Bielema. He just doesn’t get Arkansas…the people…the culture…nor the football…but it will take a long-time for some of my friends to understand that…a really long time.”
Well, it’s now Bret Bielema’s FIFTH year as the head coach at Arkansas and in his 56 th game as the head coach of the Razorbacks his team just got their ass whipped by the score of…
48 – 22
….by a decent but still average South Carolina team which leaves Bielema’s records at….
Overall: 27 – 29
SEC: 10 – 24
…but most shocking of all is Bielema’s record against Power 5 Conference Schools:
13 – 29
Damn…that’s just Damn Awful!
To put into perspective just how bad Bret Bielema has been at Arkansas one must look at his conference winning percentage against all of the previous Arkansas coaches, throwing out the Idiocy of John L. Smith who also should have NEVER been hired even as an interim head coach at Arkansas by AD Jeff Long, and when you look at those numbers it is very Damn ugly indeed:
Arkansas Head Football Coaches Conference Winning % – 1950 – 2017
Bret Bielema – .294
Bobby Petrino – .531
Houston Nutt – .525
Danny Ford – .402
Joe Kines – .438
Jack Crowe – .375
Ken Hatfield – .783
Lou Holtz – .670
Frank Broyles – .714
Jack Mitchell – .472
Bowden Wyatt – .583
Otis Douglas – .222
That’s right…you have to go back to the years 1950 – 1952 and Arkansas head coach Otis Douglas to find a worse conference record than the one that Bret Bielema has put up over the past FIVE seasons at Arkansas and for those slow on the uptake that is…
11 Arkansas Head Coaches Ago
65 Years Ago!
Bret Bielema just hasn’t been bad at Arkansas…he more importantly has been bad relative to Arkansas football history in the Post World War II era when .500+ football in conference and against serious opponents such as the Power 5 Conference Teams today was not only expected but was achieved by the head coaches at Arkansas which makes one wonder….
Will Arkansas AD Jeff Long let Bret Bielema destroy Arkansas Football on the sword of Jeff Long’s massive ego or will Jeff Long do something we have never heard Jeff do…
Admit he was wrong?
How exactly did Bret Bielema get his current contract which pays $4+ Million Dollars a year and includes a $15+ Million Dollar Buyout you ask?
Jeff Long gave that HUGE contract and buyout to Bret Bielema after the 2014 season when Arkansas went…wait for it…
7 – 6!
That sound you hear is us Laughing Out Loud with the everyone else with an IQ over Johnny Manziel’s jersey number at Texas A&M = 2!
With the loss to South Carolina the Razorbacks are now 2 – 3 on the season and 0 – 2 in SEC play and they have left on the schedule this…
At Ole Miss
Any chance Arkansas wins 4 of their last 7 games to get to .500….which is Pitiful Football in our opinion at Arkansas which Bobby Petrino proved just a few years ago?
Not A Chance in Hell…in our humble opinion and if Arkansas doesn’t get to 6 wins in Bielema’s FIFTH year on the job $15M+ buyout or not Bret Bielema and Jeff Long are going to get a call sometime in late November or early December telling them they need to come to a meeting that some very busy folks will be attending and wanting to know just what the Hell is wrong with you two Damn Morons who have gutted and destroyed Arkansas Football followed by both of them being told to get the personal stuff in their offices together because their services were no longer needed at the University of Arkansas!
2. Butch Jones, Tennessee – The best news about last week for Butch Jones was that his Vols had the week off so they couldn’t lose a football game and Jones didn’t say anything stupid which is a miracle of sorts considering all the Stupid Shit that Butch Jones has said in the last few years in Knoxville!
Much like Bret Bielema…Butch Jones has a record problem at Tennessee with the Vols records over the five seasons under Jones at…
Overall: 33 – 23
SEC: 14 – 20
….and in the all-important record against Power 5 Conference Schools Jones’ record is…
18 – 23
Those are much better records than Bret Bielema which are nothing short of a Total Damn Disaster….but come now…we are talking about University of Tennessee Football here where a .500+ records in…
SEC and against Power 5 Conference Schools
….is not only expected it better Damn be achieved and thus now you know why Butch Jones is on the Hot Seat especially when you consider all the Stupid Shit Jones has said in the last few years in Knoxville!
The word on Butch Jones that a Coaches Hot Seat member is getting from his kind-of-related family members who live in East Tennessee and are UT-alums is that Butch Jones can save his job with the Vols IF….he wins ALL his remaining games save Alabama and with that in mind let’s go to what’s left on Tennessee’s schedule:
Hell….most Tennessee Football teams could easily go 6 – 1 in the 7 above remaining football games but this is the 2017 version of the Vols is NOT most Tennessee Football Teams (Hell..they QUIT against Georgia!) and we would say the chance of the Vols finishing 9 – 3 in 2017 is around the same odds that a Coaches Hot Seat member will sleep with one of Sports Illustrated swimsuit models in 2017 which has odds now set at….
Of course….we will not discount the chance that Butch Jones might have his agent Jimmy Sexton beating the bushes for another head football coaching job in college football right now and we can only imagine Sexton looking down the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings and saying something like…
“Hmmmm…I might be able to get Butch out of Tennessee and into “X” job before his ass gets fired in Knoxville!”
Maybe Jimmy…Maybe So Son!
Coach Hard against South Carolina Butch Jones….another potential employer might be watching!
3. Todd Graham, Arizona State – Arizona State had an bye in Week 6 after their loss to Stanford in Week 7 and now it’s back to football and here come the Smoking Hot Washington Huskies into Tempe to play the Sun Devils and Chris Petersen really has things rolling at UW where in the Huskies last 23 games Washington is…
21 – 2!
Damn…just when Todd Graham really needs a win to get his 2 – 3 Arizona State football team going he has to play Washington and then go to Salt Lake City in Week 7 to play Utah followed by USC in the desert!
Hell…Arizona State could be 2 – 6 in just a few weeks and Todd Graham out of a job so coach hard Todd because these next few games may be your last chance to be a head coach at a FBS school for a few years at least which is what this is really all about…it’s not about the money…it’s performing at a high enough level so that you have…
Earned the Right to be a Head Coach on the FBS level….PERIOD!
4. David Beaty, Kansas – Kansas got its ass whipped by Texas Tech on Saturday by the score of 65 – 19 and that’s becoming a common theme for the Jayhawks….
Getting Its Ass Whipped
….under head coach David Beaty who now has record at KU of…
Overall: 3 – 26
Big 12: 1 – 19
Oh…they must give thanks for Charlie Strong in Lawrence, Kansas because without that Pitiful Texas team that Charlie brought to Lawrence last year the Jayhawks would have ZERO Big 12 Conference wins under David Beaty the last THREE seasons!
Three seasons ago in 2014 Charlie Weis got fired about this time of the year and at the time when Chubby Charlie got canned by Kansas when in reality his Sorry Ass NEVER should have been hired by KU Chubby Charlie’s overall record was….
6 – 22
…and David Beaty’s overall record right now is…
3 – 26
That sound you hear is Coaches Hot Seat laughing out freaking LOUD!
Geez…what a Damn mess but the upside is that more than likely when Kansas runs David Beaty…and even KU will run David Beaty with the above records…no doubt the folks in Lawrence will make another…
Totally Damn Stupid Hire and that coach will shortly thereafter find his ass on the Hot Seat and…the Stupid Ass Wheels on the Bus Go Round and Round All the Damn Time at Kansas!
5. Barry Odom, Missouri – Missouri put a good fight against Mark Stoops Kentucky team which is an amazing bunch in so many ways in that they will play as Good or Bad as they team they are facing which says a lot about Mark Stoops inability to get his team ready and focused on gameday which will leave for another day and focus on Barry Odom who in his SECOND season as the head coach at Mizzou has now posted records of…
Overall: 5 – 12
SEC: 2 – 9
…and the 1 – 4 Tigers still have to play this season:
Our guess Missouri wins 2…maybe 3….of its remaining 7 games which if it’s 3 more games that would be two straight years of…
4 – 8
…records under Odom which is Bad….Oh It’s Damn Bad….and it’s up to Barry Odom to make it Good…Damn Good Son or your ass will be run…and should be run…right out of Columbia!
6. Mike Riley, Nebraska – As they say about today’s world “things change fast” and they even change fast in Nebraska because after the Nebraska loss at home to Wisconsin on Saturday we called a few of our Husker-alum friends on Sunday and to a person they all said very close to the following:
“Unless Mike Riley beats Ohio State at home next Saturday it’s over for Mike and Scott Frost will be the next head coach at Nebraska.”
If Nebraska can get current UCF head coach Scott Frost that is who we hear is now Very Damn High on several Athletic Directors lists for a new head football coach which means that Nebraska probably has the inside lane to get Frost as their next head coach if Mike Riley is fired BUT Frost may have a choice of several plum jobs in a month or so BUT there is probably not a job that fits Frost as well or where Frost can win a lot of games in the Big Ten West Division like the Nebraska job!
As for Mike Riley if Nebraska can win the rest of their games this season against…
At Penn State
…which is about as likely as a Coaches Hot Seat member sleeping with a Sports Illustrated swimsuit model in 2017 then Riley can coach the Huskers in 2018!
Coach em up Mike Riley…we will be pulling for your Huskers against Ohio State!
Just an opinion by Coaches Hot Seat on current UCF head Scott Frost. We have been watching and following Scott Frost since he first arrived on The Farm at Stanford in 1993 to play for Bill Walsh for two seasons before transferring to Nebraska to play for Tom Osborne for his last two years in college and right now…in our humble opinion…Frost is the best college head football coach not on the Power 5 Conference Level in America and it would be a GREAT move for Nebraska or any other Power 5 Conference school that can get him as their next head football coach.
7. Steve Addazio, Boston College – Can someone go ahead and end the misery of the Steve Addazio tenure at Boston College already and hire Chip Kelly to coach the Eagles so he can take the ACC by storm from a perch in Boston?
With the loss to Virginia Tech on Saturday Steve Addazio’s records at Boston College now stand at:
Overall: 26 – 31
ACC: 11 – 24
Please…Administration at Boston College…end this Damn Madness already because we are tired of writing about Steve Freaking Addazio and if you can get Chip Kelly at $3 Million A Year he will be worth every penny!
8. Jim Mora, UCLA – The UCLA Bruins had a bye in Week 6 and get back to it in Week 7 with a game at now red-hat Arizona which may have found themselves a quarterback against Colorado last Saturday which is No Damn Good News for Jim Mora and his Bruins who now at 3 – 2 really have to win some ballgames or the 2017 season could fall to pieces in a hurry.
Jim Mora’s records at UCLA are….So-So…
Overall: 44 – 26
Pac-12: 26 – 22
…but after a 4 – 8 record in 2016 the last thing Mora needs is another losing season in 2016 and with these games left to play…
…the 3 – 2 Bruins are going to have a tough time finding at least 3 more wins this season if they lose to Arizona on Saturday!
9. Lincoln Riley, Oklahoma – Our biggest worry about Lincoln Riley taking over for Bob Stoops at Oklahoma was Riley turning the Sooners into…
Texas Tech Football North
….and it seems that more games that Riley has under his belt as the head coach of the Sooners the more that OU looks like the Red Raiders which the last two games has included….
An almost loss to ZERO wins Baylor
A home loss to MASSIVE underdog Iowa State
…and up next for what looks like to us the becoming Very Damn Soft Sooners is Texas in Dallas in the Red River Rivalry and it looks like to us that Texas is playing some pretty good football under Tom Herman and if the Longhorns beat the Sooners on Saturday Lincoln Riley will find his ass not only on a Scorching Hot Seat but in a sling as well!
Hell…how many more games can Very Damn Soft Oklahoma win in 2017 with these games remaining?
Texas – Dallas
At Kansas State
At Oklahoma State
Hell…if OU plays like they did against Iowa State they will be LUCKY to win 3 more games which would add up to a…
7 – 5
…record and Lincoln Riley only one more Below Average season from having his ass run right out Norman, Oklahoma!
You better start coaching your Oklahoma Sooners football team Son or your head coaching career will be OVER before it really gets going and Oh Yea…the leash is Very Damn Short…and Should Be Short….for head coaches at OU that win less than 9 games a year!
10. Ed Orgeron, LSU – Luckily for Ed Orgeron and LSU they got to play on Saturday…
One of the Worst Coached Offenses in America
….in the Florida Gators offense which would be a Helluva lot better if head coach Jim McElwain and offensive coordinator Doug Nussmeier just gave the Gators offense some footballs at practice and Jim + Doug went to a local Gainesville bar!
With the win over Florida…LSU improves its record to 4 – 2 on the season with the below games still left on the schedule which we do note does not include offenses coached by Jim McElwain and Doug Nussmeier who are Totally Damn Worthless and are actually making the Florida Gators Offense WORSE every day that the two of them report to work at the University of Florida!
At Ole Miss
Our guess as of October 9, 2017….LSU finishes with a record of…
7 – 5
…in 2017 and Ed Orgeron’s rear-end is still on one of the Hottest Seats in the country come late November!