Tag Archive: LSU

Post Spring 2018 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

Harry May 1, 2018 0 Comments

With the 2018 College Football Spring Games almost complete it’s time to take a look at the Head Coaches now sitting on the Hot Seat and look towards the Fall as we celebrate Spring and look towards Summer vacations ourselves. We also need to look ahead to the 2018 schedules for each of the teams with Head Coaches on the Hot Seat and guess on a win/loss record and if the Head Coach will still be employed by the school by the time the middle of December rolls around.

Let’s bring out the Great Johnny Cash to give a Spring Hello to the Head Coaches now on the Hot Seat! Give ‘Em Hell Johnny!

Thank You Mr. Cash!

Coaches Hot Seat Ranking – May 2018

#1 – 10 CFB Head Coaches on the Hot Seat – May 2018

1. David Beaty, Kansas – David Beaty is entering his 4 th season as the head coach of the Kansas Jayhawks and his records are Not Good…make that…they are Damn Ugly!

Overall: 3 – 33

Big 12: 1 – 26

Let’s not forget in this spot that current Kansas AD Sheahon Zenger also hired Charlie Weis to coach Kansas in 2012 and Weis + Beaty’s records combined with Interim Head Coach Clint Bowen have posted records over the past 6 years of….

Overall: 9 – 62

Big 12: 3 – 51

If you were wondering how Sheaon Zenger is still employed at Kansas you are not alone but let’s look at the 2018 schedule for the Total Damn Disaster that is the Kansas Football Program and see where this train wreck is going:

Nicholls
At Central Michigan
Rutgers
At Baylor
Oklahoma State
At West Virginia
At Texas Tech
TCU
Iowa State
At Kansas State
At Oklahoma
Texas

That looks to us like a record of….

1 – 11

2 – 10

…..for Kansas in 2018 and there’s no way David Beaty can survive another Total Damn Disaster of a season….right?

Who the Hell knows….after all….this is Kansas!

2. Lovie Smith, Illinois – We still haven’t a clue why Lovie Smith was hired as the head football coach at Illinois since Lovie did nothing in his coaching career to make us think he would EVER be a successful college head coach.

In fact, having watched Lovie Smith coach closely in his 11 seasons as the head coach of the Chicago Bears and Tampa Bay Buccaneers it’s our opinion that Lovie is a classic “NFL Coach” and therefore would always be an Average College Head Coach at best and so far….

Lovie has been a Well-Below Average College Head Coach!

Lovie Smith’s records at Illinois:

Overall: 5 – 19

Big Ten: 2 – 16

Not good….let’s look at the 2018 Illinois Football Schedule to see where this may be going….

Kent State
Western Illinois
USF
Penn State
At Rutgers
Purdue
At Wisconsin
At Maryland
Minnesota
At Nebraska
Iowa
At Northwestern

That looks like 3 or 4 wins for Lovie Smith and the Illini in 2018 and….

There’s Not A Chance In Hell Lovie Smith can survive 4 win or less season and return to coach Illinois in 2019.

3. Kliff Kingsbury, Texas Tech – If anyone had told us before the 2013 college football season that Kliff Kingsbury would be sitting on records of…

Overall: 30 – 33

Big 12: 16 – 29

….at Texas Tech and that Kliff still be the head coach of the Red Raiders we wouldn’t believe it and yet….

Kliff Kingsbury is still the head coach in Lubbock!

Got Nuts? Yep!

Can Kliff Kingsbury possibly keep his job by posting another .500 or so records each season at Texas Tech?

We haven’t a Damn Clue but the standards have been lowered so much for Texas Tech Football maybe Kliff can hang onto his job in the middle of an incredibly Mediocre Run the last 5 seasons and with that in mind let’s look at the Red Raiders 2018 schedule…

Ole Miss
Lamar
Houston
At Oklahoma State
West Virginia
At TCU
Kansas
At Iowa State
Oklahoma
Texas
At Kansas State
Baylor

Best Case Scenario: Texas Tech wins 7 games

Worst Case Scenario: Texas Tech wins 4 games

Can Kliff Kingsbury survive to coach Texas Tech another year with just 7 wins in 2018?

Maybe so…and that says a Helluva Lot about how accepting of Mediocrity folks in Lubbock have become and let’s just hope that disease doesn’t spread to the rest of America because it would destroy our country!

4. Luke Fickell, Cincinnati – Luke Fickell is entering his 3 rd season as a head coach in his 2 nd year at Cincinnati and fans of college football will remember that Fickell took over a Loaded Ohio State team after Jim Tressel got fired in the Spring of 2011 and promptly went 6 – 6 taking his team to a Gator Bowl which cost an undefeated Ohio State football team a chance to play for a National Title in 2012 under Urban Meyer.

The question for us here at Coaches Hot Seat as we look at Fickell’s two years as a head coach….

Overall: 10 – 15

Conference: 5 – 11

…and his record at Cincinnati after one year….

Overall: 4 – 8

AAC: 2 – 6

….does Luke Fickell have a Damn Clue how to be a head coach?

That question will be answered in 2018 because this 2 nd season under Fickell should be a bounce-back year to at least a .500 record and with that in mind let’s look at the Bearcats 2018 schedule:

At UCLA
At Miami (Ohio)
Alabama A&M
Ohio
At UConn
Tulane
At Temple
At SMU
Navy
USF
At UCF
East Carolina

Cincinnati should win at least…6 games in 2018….but will Fickell coach the Bearcats to at least 6 wins?

No….in our humble opinion and more than likely because Fickell has a Totally Damn Absurd buyout in his contract the folks at Cincinnati will have to tolerate Below Mediocrity for the foreseeable future….in our humble opinion!

5. Kalani Sitake, BYU – Kalani Sitake took over a BYU Football team from former head coach Bronco Mendenhall who posted…

11 straight winning seasons

….which Sitake continued in Year 1 with a record of….

9 – 4

…but in Year 2 the Cougars dropped to…

4 – 9

….and now Sitake is coaching for his job because we don’t think there’s ANY CHANCE the folks in Provo will tolerate two straight losing seasons which takes us to BYU’s 2018 schedule:

At Arizona
California
At Wisconsin
McNeese
At Washington
Utah State
Hawaii
Northern Illinois
At Boise State
At UMass
New Mexico State
At Utah

There’s at least 6 wins on that schedule and thus No Good Excuse for Kalani Sitake and his Cougars to have a losing record in 2018!

6. Jim Harbaugh, Michigan – When one looks at Jim Harbaugh’s records in three years at Michigan…

2015: 10 – 3
2016: 10 – 3
2017: 8 – 5

Overall: 28 – 11

Big Ten: 18 – 8

….they don’t look too bad but when realizes that Michigan has played 22 FBS teams with .500 or better records the last three seasons and Jimmy’s record against those teams is…

10 – 12

….it’s easy to understand why Jimmy is now sitting on the Hot Seat!

Jim Harbaugh is being paid an enormous amount of money….

$7 Million Plus Annually

……to build a Championship Football Program at Michigan meaning….

Winning Big Ten Championships
Playing in College Football Playoff
Winning National Championships

….and in April 2018 the above goals seem so far away one must start to wonder….

How long can this Mediocrity continue for Jim Harbaugh at Michigan?

The word from a close Michigan alum in San Francisco is….

“If Jim only wins 8 games again in 2018 he will not be the head coach of Blue in December.”

With that in mind let’s look at the 2018 Michigan Football Schedule:

At Notre Dame
Western Michigan
SMU
Nebraska
At Northwestern
Maryland
Wisconsin
At Michigan State
Penn State
At Rutgers
Indiana
At Ohio State

If Michigan can beat Notre Dame in South Bend on the opening weekend then maybe Blue can be 3 – 0 heading into Big Ten play but with Scott Frost now in Lincoln, and the second game at Northwestern, along with at least FOUR other Big Ten games where Michigan might be the underdog it’s not hard to conjure up another….

8 – 4

…record of Michigan in 2018 and if that happens….

Michigan will have a new head football coach before January 1, 2019.

Where could Jim Harbaugh end up if things don’t work out at Michigan?

Our guess —-> New York Jets for 2019 season!

7. Ed Orgeron, LSU – In two seasons at LSU Ed Orgeron is sitting on records of…

Overall: 15 – 6

SEC: 10 – 4

….but let’s get serious here in the last two seasons under Coach O LSU has played…

14 FBS Teams with .500 or better records

…and the Tigers’ record in those games is…

8 – 6

…and in case you didn’t know it…

That’s NOT LSU Football!

Let’s go to the 2018 LSU schedule to see where this could be going in Baton Rouge….

Miami (Dallas)
SE Louisiana
At Auburn
La. Tech
Ole Miss
At Florida
Georgia
Mississippi State
Alabama
At Arkansas
Rice
At Texas A&M

Geez…that’s a pretty TOUGH schedule and if LSU loses that opening game to Miami in Dallas it’s not hard to imagine the Tigers being…

3 – 2

…heading to Gainesville to play Florida with….

Georgia
Mississippi State
Alabama

….up next for Coach O.

Our guess….LSU ends up with a record of….

5 – 7

…in 2018 and LSU had a new head football coach before January 1, 2019!

This would be a GREAT season for Lane Kiffin to put up 11 – 1 or at worst 10 – 2 season at Florida Atlantic which opens the season at Oklahoma if Lane is hoping to get a head coaching job in the SEC namely in Baton Rouge!

8. Major Applewhite, Houston – Big Houston booster Tilman Fertita has made it clear he is not going to tolerate Houston football slipping back into Mediocrity after the Cougars posted a record of…

22 – 4

….in Tom Herman’s two seasons at Houston which is especially GREAT compared to the….

7 – 6

…record that Major Applewhite posted in his first year on the job in H-Town!

We have it on “very good authority” that if Major Applewhite wins less than…

10 Games in 2018

….that his job will be in serious jeopardy after the Cougars play at Memphis on November 23.

With that in mind let’s go to the 2018 Houston schedule:

At Rice
Arizona
At Texas Tech
Texas Southern
Tulsa
At East Carolina
At Navy
USF
At SMU
Temple
Tulane
At Memphis

If you think Houston is going to win at least 10 games with the above schedule then you are seeing something we aren’t for Damn sure!

9. Larry Fedora, North Carolina – You can sit around all day trying to figure out why North Carolina took a step back in 2017 under head coach Larry Fedora but when one realizes that the Tar Heels were ranked…

#88 in Scoring Defense giving up 31.3 points per game

AND

#83 in Scoring Offense scoring 26 points per game

…you are not going to win a Helluva lot of football games and thus the…

3 – 9

….UNC record last season!

Larry Fedora’s records in SIX seasons at North Carolina don’t look too bad…

Overall: 43 – 34

ACC: 27 – 21

….but Fedora cannot survive another losing season in Chapel Hill and with that let’s look at the Tar Heels 2016 schedule:

At California
At East Carolina
UCF
Pitt
At Miami
Virginia Tech
At Syracuse
At Virginia
Georgia Tech
At Duke
Western Carolina
NC State

It may be hard for North Carolina to win at least 6 games in 2018 with that schedule unless there is a dramatic turnaround on both sides of the ball and if UNC only wins 5 games this coming season…

Larry Fedora’s head coaching career is probably OVER at least at the Power 5 Level….which should be Plenty of Damn Pressure to motivate Larry!

10. Dana Holgorsen, West Virginia – The most Damning record for Dana Holgorsen in his SIX seasons at West Virginia is the Mountaineers record in Big 12 Conference play since WVU joined the Big 12 in the 2012 season:

27 – 27

Getting above .500 and going to bowl games at West Virginia each season which is certainly geographically challenged in the Big 12 Conference is kind of an accomplishment….but come on now….don’t we all expect more out of West Virginia football that just…

Mediocrity?

YES!

Let’s look at West Virginia’s 2018 schedule….

Tennessee (Charlotte)
Youngstown State
At NC State
Kansas State
At Texas Tech
Kansas
At Iowa State
Baylor
At Texas
TCU
At Oklahoma State
Oklahoma

That looks like another 7 – 5 season for Holgorsen at West Virginia in 2018 and will that be acceptable to the folks in Morgantown?

We haven’t a Damn Clue…but we sure Hell wouldn’t accept it!

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BYU, Cincinnati, Coaches Hot Seat, Coaches Hot Seat Rankings, Dana Holgorsen, David Beaty, Ed Orgeron, Houston, Illinois, Jim Harbaugh, Kalani Sitake, Kansas, Kliff Kingsbury, Larry Fedora, Lovie Smith, LSU, Luck Fickell, Major Applewhite, Michigan, North Carolina, Texas Tech, West Virginia

2017 Post Week 6 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – Tom Petty + Stevie Nicks Learning To Fly – Thanks Tom and Godspeed Son! – Johnny Cash Giving The Hot Seat Coaches Hell! – Welcome To The Hot Seat Lincoln Riley…Head Coach of the Charmin Very Damn Soft Oklahoma Sooners!

Harry October 9, 2017 0 Comments

We can’t start Week 7 of the 2017 College Football Season without first recognizing the passing of the Great Tom Petty who was always teaching us how to fly in life!

Learning To Fly, Tom Petty and his 40+ year friend Stevie Nicks!

Thank You Tom for your amazing music and God Speed To You Son…Your Music Will Live Forever!

Post Week 6 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

Thank You Mr. Cash!

1. Bret Bielema, Arkansas – In the last decade-plus we have written a lot in this Coaches Hot Seat Blog about the importance of Athletic Directors making Damn sure they hire head football coaches that “fit” the culture and history of the school the AD words for, but this is the first time we have written about something just as important:

Coaches taking jobs where they “fit” the culture and history of the school.

A handful of Coaches Hot Seat members have stopped in at Madison, Wisconsin a few times while on business trips in the Great State of Wisconsin and even been to a couple Wisconsin Badgers football games and on one of those trips a few years ago when Bret Bielema was still the head coach of the Badgers there was a story we read about how Bielema liked to drive around in his SUV on Gameday Saturdays in Madison before the games to see what all the Wisconsin fans were up to with most of those fans not knowing it was the UW head coach in that SUV. When reading that story we just laughed at it because it was classic Bret Bielema and in our minds not knowing about any potential issues that were going on between Wisconsin AD Barry Alvarez and Bret Bielema we always thought that Bret was a good “fit” at Wisconsin and that he would be there until he got his ass fired or he retired.

As you can imagine with the above in mind everyone at Coaches Hot Seat was shocked when in early December 2012 it was announced that Bret Bielema was leaving Wisconsin for the Arkansas head coaching job which made no sense on many levels and like a lot of other people made us think that Barry Alvarez must be one Helluva asshole to work for and if the media reports are true Cheap As Hell when it comes to paying Wisconsin assistant coaches since after all…Not A Damn Dime of the money that Barry Alvarez pays Wisconsin Athletic Department employees with is Barry’s money! Whatever the issues were between Alvarez and Bielema it blew-up a pretty good arrangement for the both of them which later happened again with Alvarez and current Oregon State head coach Gary Andersen who also must be a Real American Man and doesn’t like being led around by the nose from a former football coach who doesn’t seem to know that Real Leaders hire people to do jobs and they…

Let Them Do Their Job!

Leaving Barry Alvarez aside for the moment who in our opinion is a Pompous Arrogant Ass that believes he spun up the entire universe and thus everyone should kiss Barry’s Precious Big Ass….Sorry Barry but your are not God Son and hopefully one day the Lord himself will let you know that personally….let’s get back to Bret Bielema at Arkansas which on so many levels for both Arkansas and Bielema made just no Damn sense and we write that because early on a long-time friend + Arkansas-alum called us in Bielema’s first year at Arkansas in the Fall of 2013 and said something like (paraphrasing since it was so long ago):

“It’s just not going to work with Bielema. He just doesn’t get Arkansas…the people…the culture…nor the football…but it will take a long-time for some of my friends to understand that…a really long time.”

Well, it’s now Bret Bielema’s FIFTH year as the head coach at Arkansas and in his 56 th game as the head coach of the Razorbacks his team just got their ass whipped by the score of…

48 – 22

….by a decent but still average South Carolina team which leaves Bielema’s records at….

Overall: 27 – 29

SEC: 10 – 24

…but most shocking of all is Bielema’s record against Power 5 Conference Schools:

13 – 29

Damn…that’s just Damn Awful!

To put into perspective just how bad Bret Bielema has been at Arkansas one must look at his conference winning percentage against all of the previous Arkansas coaches, throwing out the Idiocy of John L. Smith who also should have NEVER been hired even as an interim head coach at Arkansas by AD Jeff Long, and when you look at those numbers it is very Damn ugly indeed:

Arkansas Head Football Coaches Conference Winning % – 1950 – 2017

Bret Bielema – .294

Bobby Petrino – .531

Houston Nutt – .525

Danny Ford – .402

Joe Kines – .438

Jack Crowe – .375

Ken Hatfield – .783

Lou Holtz – .670

Frank Broyles – .714

Jack Mitchell – .472

Bowden Wyatt – .583

Otis Douglas – .222

That’s right…you have to go back to the years 1950 – 1952 and Arkansas head coach Otis Douglas to find a worse conference record than the one that Bret Bielema has put up over the past FIVE seasons at Arkansas and for those slow on the uptake that is…

11 Arkansas Head Coaches Ago

AND

65 Years Ago!

Bret Bielema just hasn’t been bad at Arkansas…he more importantly has been bad relative to Arkansas football history in the Post World War II era when .500+ football in conference and against serious opponents such as the Power 5 Conference Teams today was not only expected but was achieved by the head coaches at Arkansas which makes one wonder….

Will Arkansas AD Jeff Long let Bret Bielema destroy Arkansas Football on the sword of Jeff Long’s massive ego or will Jeff Long do something we have never heard Jeff do…

Admit he was wrong?

How exactly did Bret Bielema get his current contract which pays $4+ Million Dollars a year and includes a $15+ Million Dollar Buyout you ask?

Jeff Long gave that HUGE contract and buyout to Bret Bielema after the 2014 season when Arkansas went…wait for it…

7 – 6!

That sound you hear is us Laughing Out Loud with the everyone else with an IQ over Johnny Manziel’s jersey number at Texas A&M = 2!

With the loss to South Carolina the Razorbacks are now 2 – 3 on the season and 0 – 2 in SEC play and they have left on the schedule this…

At Alabama
Auburn
At Ole Miss
Coastal Carolina
At LSU
Mississippi State
Missouri

Any chance Arkansas wins 4 of their last 7 games to get to .500….which is Pitiful Football in our opinion at Arkansas which Bobby Petrino proved just a few years ago?

Not A Chance in Hell…in our humble opinion and if Arkansas doesn’t get to 6 wins in Bielema’s FIFTH year on the job $15M+ buyout or not Bret Bielema and Jeff Long are going to get a call sometime in late November or early December telling them they need to come to a meeting that some very busy folks will be attending and wanting to know just what the Hell is wrong with you two Damn Morons who have gutted and destroyed Arkansas Football followed by both of them being told to get the personal stuff in their offices together because their services were no longer needed at the University of Arkansas!

2. Butch Jones, Tennessee – The best news about last week for Butch Jones was that his Vols had the week off so they couldn’t lose a football game and Jones didn’t say anything stupid which is a miracle of sorts considering all the Stupid Shit that Butch Jones has said in the last few years in Knoxville!

Much like Bret Bielema…Butch Jones has a record problem at Tennessee with the Vols records over the five seasons under Jones at…

Overall: 33 – 23

SEC: 14 – 20

….and in the all-important record against Power 5 Conference Schools Jones’ record is…

18 – 23

Those are much better records than Bret Bielema which are nothing short of a Total Damn Disaster….but come now…we are talking about University of Tennessee Football here where a .500+ records in…

SEC and against Power 5 Conference Schools

….is not only expected it better Damn be achieved and thus now you know why Butch Jones is on the Hot Seat especially when you consider all the Stupid Shit Jones has said in the last few years in Knoxville!

The word on Butch Jones that a Coaches Hot Seat member is getting from his kind-of-related family members who live in East Tennessee and are UT-alums is that Butch Jones can save his job with the Vols IF….he wins ALL his remaining games save Alabama and with that in mind let’s go to what’s left on Tennessee’s schedule:

South Carolina
At Alabama
At Kentucky
Southern Miss
At Missouri
LSU
Vanderbilt

Hell….most Tennessee Football teams could easily go 6 – 1 in the 7 above remaining football games but this is the 2017 version of the Vols is NOT most Tennessee Football Teams (Hell..they QUIT against Georgia!) and we would say the chance of the Vols finishing 9 – 3 in 2017 is around the same odds that a Coaches Hot Seat member will sleep with one of Sports Illustrated swimsuit models in 2017 which has odds now set at….

ZILCHO!

Of course….we will not discount the chance that Butch Jones might have his agent Jimmy Sexton beating the bushes for another head football coaching job in college football right now and we can only imagine Sexton looking down the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings and saying something like…

“Hmmmm…I might be able to get Butch out of Tennessee and into “X” job before his ass gets fired in Knoxville!”

Maybe Jimmy…Maybe So Son!

Coach Hard against South Carolina Butch Jones….another potential employer might be watching!

3. Todd Graham, Arizona State – Arizona State had an bye in Week 6 after their loss to Stanford in Week 7 and now it’s back to football and here come the Smoking Hot Washington Huskies into Tempe to play the Sun Devils and Chris Petersen really has things rolling at UW where in the Huskies last 23 games Washington is…

21 – 2!

Damn…just when Todd Graham really needs a win to get his 2 – 3 Arizona State football team going he has to play Washington and then go to Salt Lake City in Week 7 to play Utah followed by USC in the desert!

Hell…Arizona State could be 2 – 6 in just a few weeks and Todd Graham out of a job so coach hard Todd because these next few games may be your last chance to be a head coach at a FBS school for a few years at least which is what this is really all about…it’s not about the money…it’s performing at a high enough level so that you have…

Earned the Right to be a Head Coach on the FBS level….PERIOD!

4. David Beaty, Kansas – Kansas got its ass whipped by Texas Tech on Saturday by the score of 65 – 19 and that’s becoming a common theme for the Jayhawks….

Getting Its Ass Whipped

….under head coach David Beaty who now has record at KU of…

Overall: 3 – 26

Big 12: 1 – 19

Oh…they must give thanks for Charlie Strong in Lawrence, Kansas because without that Pitiful Texas team that Charlie brought to Lawrence last year the Jayhawks would have ZERO Big 12 Conference wins under David Beaty the last THREE seasons!

Three seasons ago in 2014 Charlie Weis got fired about this time of the year and at the time when Chubby Charlie got canned by Kansas when in reality his Sorry Ass NEVER should have been hired by KU Chubby Charlie’s overall record was….

6 – 22

…and David Beaty’s overall record right now is…

3 – 26

That sound you hear is Coaches Hot Seat laughing out freaking LOUD!

Geez…what a Damn mess but the upside is that more than likely when Kansas runs David Beaty…and even KU will run David Beaty with the above records…no doubt the folks in Lawrence will make another…

Totally Damn Stupid Hire and that coach will shortly thereafter find his ass on the Hot Seat and…the Stupid Ass Wheels on the Bus Go Round and Round All the Damn Time at Kansas!

5. Barry Odom, Missouri – Missouri put a good fight against Mark Stoops Kentucky team which is an amazing bunch in so many ways in that they will play as Good or Bad as they team they are facing which says a lot about Mark Stoops inability to get his team ready and focused on gameday which will leave for another day and focus on Barry Odom who in his SECOND season as the head coach at Mizzou has now posted records of…

Overall: 5 – 12

SEC: 2 – 9

…and the 1 – 4 Tigers still have to play this season:

At Georgia
Idaho
At UConn
Florida
Tennessee
At Vanderbilt
At Arkansas

Our guess Missouri wins 2…maybe 3….of its remaining 7 games which if it’s 3 more games that would be two straight years of…

4 – 8

…records under Odom which is Bad….Oh It’s Damn Bad….and it’s up to Barry Odom to make it Good…Damn Good Son or your ass will be run…and should be run…right out of Columbia!

6. Mike Riley, Nebraska – As they say about today’s world “things change fast” and they even change fast in Nebraska because after the Nebraska loss at home to Wisconsin on Saturday we called a few of our Husker-alum friends on Sunday and to a person they all said very close to the following:

“Unless Mike Riley beats Ohio State at home next Saturday it’s over for Mike and Scott Frost will be the next head coach at Nebraska.”

If Nebraska can get current UCF head coach Scott Frost that is who we hear is now Very Damn High on several Athletic Directors lists for a new head football coach which means that Nebraska probably has the inside lane to get Frost as their next head coach if Mike Riley is fired BUT Frost may have a choice of several plum jobs in a month or so BUT there is probably not a job that fits Frost as well or where Frost can win a lot of games in the Big Ten West Division like the Nebraska job!

As for Mike Riley if Nebraska can win the rest of their games this season against…

Ohio State
At Purdue
Northwestern
At Minnesota
At Penn State
Iowa

…which is about as likely as a Coaches Hot Seat member sleeping with a Sports Illustrated swimsuit model in 2017 then Riley can coach the Huskers in 2018!

Coach em up Mike Riley…we will be pulling for your Huskers against Ohio State!

Just an opinion by Coaches Hot Seat on current UCF head Scott Frost. We have been watching and following Scott Frost since he first arrived on The Farm at Stanford in 1993 to play for Bill Walsh for two seasons before transferring to Nebraska to play for Tom Osborne for his last two years in college and right now…in our humble opinion…Frost is the best college head football coach not on the Power 5 Conference Level in America and it would be a GREAT move for Nebraska or any other Power 5 Conference school that can get him as their next head football coach.

7. Steve Addazio, Boston College – Can someone go ahead and end the misery of the Steve Addazio tenure at Boston College already and hire Chip Kelly to coach the Eagles so he can take the ACC by storm from a perch in Boston?

With the loss to Virginia Tech on Saturday Steve Addazio’s records at Boston College now stand at:

Overall: 26 – 31

ACC: 11 – 24

Please…Administration at Boston College…end this Damn Madness already because we are tired of writing about Steve Freaking Addazio and if you can get Chip Kelly at $3 Million A Year he will be worth every penny!

8. Jim Mora, UCLA – The UCLA Bruins had a bye in Week 6 and get back to it in Week 7 with a game at now red-hat Arizona which may have found themselves a quarterback against Colorado last Saturday which is No Damn Good News for Jim Mora and his Bruins who now at 3 – 2 really have to win some ballgames or the 2017 season could fall to pieces in a hurry.

Jim Mora’s records at UCLA are….So-So…

Overall: 44 – 26

Pac-12: 26 – 22

…but after a 4 – 8 record in 2016 the last thing Mora needs is another losing season in 2016 and with these games left to play…

At Arizona
Oregon
At Washington
At Utah
Arizona State
At USC
California

…the 3 – 2 Bruins are going to have a tough time finding at least 3 more wins this season if they lose to Arizona on Saturday!

9. Lincoln Riley, Oklahoma – Our biggest worry about Lincoln Riley taking over for Bob Stoops at Oklahoma was Riley turning the Sooners into…

Texas Tech Football North

….and it seems that more games that Riley has under his belt as the head coach of the Sooners the more that OU looks like the Red Raiders which the last two games has included….

An almost loss to ZERO wins Baylor

A home loss to MASSIVE underdog Iowa State

…and up next for what looks like to us the becoming Very Damn Soft Sooners is Texas in Dallas in the Red River Rivalry and it looks like to us that Texas is playing some pretty good football under Tom Herman and if the Longhorns beat the Sooners on Saturday Lincoln Riley will find his ass not only on a Scorching Hot Seat but in a sling as well!

Hell…how many more games can Very Damn Soft Oklahoma win in 2017 with these games remaining?

Texas – Dallas
At Kansas State
Texas Tech
At Oklahoma State
TCU
At Kansas
West Virginia

Hell…if OU plays like they did against Iowa State they will be LUCKY to win 3 more games which would add up to a…

7 – 5

…record and Lincoln Riley only one more Below Average season from having his ass run right out Norman, Oklahoma!

You better start coaching your Oklahoma Sooners football team Son or your head coaching career will be OVER before it really gets going and Oh Yea…the leash is Very Damn Short…and Should Be Short….for head coaches at OU that win less than 9 games a year!

10. Ed Orgeron, LSU – Luckily for Ed Orgeron and LSU they got to play on Saturday…

One of the Worst Coached Offenses in America

….in the Florida Gators offense which would be a Helluva lot better if head coach Jim McElwain and offensive coordinator Doug Nussmeier just gave the Gators offense some footballs at practice and Jim + Doug went to a local Gainesville bar!

With the win over Florida…LSU improves its record to 4 – 2 on the season with the below games still left on the schedule which we do note does not include offenses coached by Jim McElwain and Doug Nussmeier who are Totally Damn Worthless and are actually making the Florida Gators Offense WORSE every day that the two of them report to work at the University of Florida!

Auburn
At Ole Miss
At Alabama
Arkansas
At Tennessee
Texas A&M

Our guess as of October 9, 2017….LSU finishes with a record of…

7 – 5

…in 2017 and Ed Orgeron’s rear-end is still on one of the Hottest Seats in the country come late November!

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Arizona State, Arkansas, Barry Odom, Boston College, Bret Bielema, Butch Jones, David Beaty, Ed Orgeron, Florida, Jeff Long, Jim McElwain, Jim Mora, Johnny Cash, Kansas, Lincoln Riley, LSU, Mike Riley, Missouri, Nebraska, Oklahoma, Steve Addazio, Stevie Nicks, Tennessee, Todd Graham, Tom Petty, UCLA

The Crack-Ups at Tennessee and LSU and Why When Put In Command….Taking Command Is So Damn Critical – Twelve O’Clock High – 2017 Post Week 5 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

Harry October 2, 2017 0 Comments

Before we get to the Post Week 5 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings let us say a few words about just what in the Hell is going on at Tennessee and LSU which now have their head coaches in the #1 and #2 slots in the latest CHS Rankings.

Any organization, company, sports team or military unit that wants to perform at a high level more than anything needs a LEADER that the people working for their particular entity can believe in and confidently follow. For the many Coaches Hot Seat members that played on sports teams and served in the US Military the importance of having a LEADER that you believe in and confidently follow is beyond CRITICAL….it’s borderline the sports team or military unit cannot function without a STRONG LEADER and therein lies most of the problems that we have seen with college head coaches getting onto the Hot Seat and eventually fired in what is now the 11 th college football season of Coaches Hot Seat’s existence.

A great story we have told in this blog many times in the last decade-plus is about a couple of Coaches Hot Seat members stationed aboard an US Navy ship that was in late 1990 preparing to deploy to the Persian Gulf to participate in what would become Operation Desert Storm in the Spring of 1991. The Commanding Officer of the CHS members ship was a competent US Naval officer in handling a Navy ship in deployments in support of facing off against the Soviet Union in the Cold War and other deployments required of Navy ships on the East coast in the late 1980s-early 1990s. The two CHS members believed though that the Commanding Officer of their ship posed a Clear and Present Danger to the safety and security of the ship and crew, and with that in mind they went to meet with the Admiral of the Destroyer Squadron at the homeport that the ship was a member of and laid out their concerns about the CO in a clear and concise manner. The Admiral after hearing those concerns leaned back in his chair in his office and looked out through the window at the ships that were under his leadership and says to the two CHS members:

“Your CO is scheduled to rotate off the ship in several months so I am thinking we will move that up a few months and you will have a new CO who will take over in a command change ceremony after the ship gets to the Persian Gulf. Your new CO is going to be “X.”

When the two CHS members heard who the new CO was going to be “X” US Naval Officer they immediately knew that their ship would be in good hands, and more importantly that once the crew got to meet the new CO they would be confident in his ability to handle an US Navy ship in a “hot” war situation. To make a long story short the new CO took over the ship pierside in Bahrain in the Persian Gulf before the ship sailed into the northern Persian Gulf in support of Operation Desert Storm, and shortly thereafter the new CO gave a speech to the crew that was similar to the speech given by the character played by Gregory Peck in the movie Twelve O’Clock High when Peck’s character took over an American airplane squadron based in England during World War II.

Needless to say the CHS members’ ship performed very well in Operation Desert Storm and both of them fervently believe that it was the leadership of the new Commanding Officer that turned a ship and crew that was apprehensive about going into a “hot” warzone with their old CO into a well-functioning and high-performing military organization that ended up saving not only themselves from harm’s way but a Helluva lot of other people as well during their 6+ month deployment to the Persian Gulf in 1991.

Relating all of the above the situations at Tennessee and LSU right now should be obvious…but if it’s not…one should understand is that the Tennessee and LSU football programs are cracking…cracking from the inside because the players and some of the coaches do not believe in the head coaches Butch Jones and Ed Orgeron who have through their actions, behavior, and words committed many self-inflicted wounds that are destroying those two football programs….and if those two coaches do not recognize their mistakes and change course soon they will both be out of a job…and soon!

If you want to watch the entire movie Twelve O’Clock High it has been posted on YouTube.com by someone and it is below….it is one Helluva Great Movie about LEADERSHIP in a very trying and tough situation that most of all can teach people and potential leaders about when Put In Command…Take Command!

Let’s get to the 2017 Post Week 5 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings which means let’s bring out the Great Johnny Cash to show these Hot Seat Coaches what they are in the middle of…not that these Hot Seat coaches don’t already know mind you!

Thank You Johnny!

1. Butch Jones, Tennessee – If there is someone that can explain to us how a head coach at Tennessee in his 5 th year in Knoxville can let his team get its ass whipped in Neyland Stadium by the score of 41 – 0 by a coach at Georgia in this 2 nd season on the job please by all means step your ass forward and let us hear what you have to say!

The Bottom-Line is there is NO explanation for that ass whipping the Georgia Bulldogs gave to the Vols on Saturday and that goes right to the point we made above about how the Tennessee football program is now coming apart from the inside with a head coach that is cracking-up under the pressure of coaching in the SEC and no doubt Vols players are now unsure just who in the Hell is leading them and just where in the Hell he is trying to take them!

Just imagine for a moment if Tennessee had not caused that late fumble against Georgia Tech when the Yellowjackets were going in to score and put away the game….Hell….if the Vols had lost to Tech they would not be at 2 – 3 with only wins over…

Indiana State
And
UMass in a close one!

From where we sit the problems at Tennessee right now are two-fold…

A. Butch Jones hasn’t a Damn Clue what he wants to do on offense with the Vols and the Tennessee quarterbacks are a severe limiting factor for this team since it is obvious they are getting NO real coaching on how to play quarterback in the SEC…which is something that a talent like Joshua Dobbs was able to cover-up for a few years but which is now a lack of coaching at the QB position that is nothing but a Total Disaster for UT.

B. The players are starting to question the LEADERSHIP of the Vols football program meaning Butch Jones and if he really knows what the Hell he is doing and that little tirade last week in front of the media…which no doubt EVERY Tennessee player took note of…did nothing but further undermine those players doubts about Jones which in our opinion led to the lackluster..some at Coaches Hot Seat called it “lack of effort” play by the Vols against Georgia.

The reality is that you just can’t get whipped 41 – 0 on your home field by a rival like Georgia in your 5 th year on the job and that is why with these games left to play….

South Carolina
At Alabama
At Kentucky
Southern Miss
At Missouri
LSU
Vanderbilt

….anything more than losing ONE more game and Butch Jones is DONE at Tennessee…Hell he might already be done at Tennessee!

Memo to Butch Jones: Coach…if you think handling the media in Knoxville is tough Son while making $4+ million dollars a year coaching football on a college campus where your Precious Ass is very Damn safe we would invite you to join the US Military like many at Coaches Hot Seat did and make $3K a month while serving in combat zones and you would quickly find that your ass is living in a Damn Fantasyland. Either toughen your ass up Butch Jones or resign because right now you are a Damn embarrassment to not only the game of football but ALL American Men!

2. Ed Orgeron, LSU – We wrote in this blog before the season that our LSU-alum friends in the New Orleans area were getting reports from Baton Rouge that the Ed Orgeron regime at LSU was already showing some cracks with Coach O’s personality starting to change as the immensity of the pressure facing him became reality as the 2017 season approached. No doubt, our LSU-alum friends knew what the Hell they were talking about back in the Summer and now they tell us that whatever we can imagine about what is going on inside the LSU program it is much worse than our wildest dreams…make that nightmares for LSU Football fans!

We are going to leave out of this blog 95% of what our LSU-alum friends passed along to us on this Sunday, but we will say that much like at Tennessee the LSU players and some of the coaches have a SERIOUS Crisis of Confidence situation going on with the leadership of Coach O and others in the LSU Athletic Department and let’s go there for a moment.

Assume for a second that you are the Athletic Director at LSU last year and after trying to make a deal to bring Tom Herman to Baton Rouge to coach the Tigers you then turn to Ed Orgeron to coach LSU who has NEVER been a coordinator on any level of college football in his coaching career. Now…a few of us at Coaches Hot Seat first met Coach O 15+ years ago when he was working as a DL coach for Pete Carroll at USC and we love the guy….but now if the LSU Athletic Department had asked Coaches Hot Seat to come up with a list of 100 coaches to coach LSU in the aftermath of the firing of Les Miles the TRUTH is….

Ed Orgeron would not have been among the 100 coaches on that list.

OK…let’s put aside that two times LSU AD Joe Alleva basically tried to hire one coach….Jimbo Fisher in 2015 and Tom Herman in 2016…and then gave his Sorry Ass up and did the easiest thing he could do which was keep Les Miles and hire Coach O. Now let’s look at last year and you come the decision to hire Coach O who has NO offers from other schools to be a head coach or even a coordinator and you as the AD give Coach O a contract that has led to a coach who had no other decent offers to now having a…

$12 Million Dollar Buyout!

Got Joe Alleva is one of the Stupidest Damn Humans on the Earth?

Good then you have the TRUTH!

OK…let’s assume that YOU were the AD at LSU and you stupidly decided to hire Coach O what would anyone with a working brain be thinking after deciding to hire a coach that was not in demand by any other schools?

Of course YOU as someone with a working brain…THINK not the current LSU AD, LSU President or LSU Board of Trustees…you would have said something like the following to Coach O:

“We are going to hire you Coach O and pay you the market rate in the SEC Conference of $3.5 to $4 million dollars a year….BUT….we are only going to give you a $1 million dollar buyout so that if things don’t work out…and let’s be honest here they did not work out the last time you were a head coach at Ole Miss….LSU will be protected. I have a 5 year contract for you with the first year guaranteed and a $1 million dollar buyout at ANYTIME for LSU if fired and you can either take it or leave it Coach O. So what will it be?”

Of course, LSU AD Joe Alleva who is someone we would not hire to wash our cars or shovel shit in West Texas and who happens to be according to our LSU-alum friends….

One of the Most Pompous Arrogant Asses alive on the Earth

….did not do the above because Joe Alleva is simply….A Damn Moron who would be lucky to be shoveling shit in West Texas if he was not working in athletic administration and that applies to ALL these other ADs in collegiate athletics that have given fully guaranteed contracts to their head football coaches when it is the AD who has the Job and thus ALL the Power to dictate the terms of the contract for the coach which is….take it or leave it!

Getting back to the situation at LSU and Ed Orgeron…LSU is now 3 – 2 on the season with TWO wins over FBS teams in BYU and Syracuse who have a combined record in 2017 of…

3 – 7

….and the Tigers still have to play this season:

At Florida
Auburn
At Ole Miss
At Alabama
Arkansas
At Tennessee
Texas A&M

That looks like 5…maybe 6 wins…for LSU in 2017 when playing a schedule that includes only ONE team….Alabama…that has more talent than the Tigers even though a Helluva lot of people in Baton Rouge are crying like Damn babies and making excuses for what is going wrong on a “lack of talent” at LSU to which we say…

Quit crying like Damn babies and making excuses and coach your Damn team Coach O and if you can’t handle the LSU head coaching job and managing the lives and activities of 100+ Tiger players then resign before you DESTROY the LSU football program!

As for LSU AD Joe Alleva…how does this Sorry Damn Bastard and Pompous Arrogant Ass still have a job at LSU?

Oh…he’s working for people….the LSU President and LSU Board of Trustees….that are stupider than Alleva!

3. Todd Graham, Arizona State – Arizona State put up a good fight against Stanford on Saturday but another LOSS is another LOSS and Todd Graham in 6 seasons at ASU has posted records of…

Overall: 41 – 29

Pac-12: 26 – 21

….and Graham’s record against Power 5 Conference Teams in the last 6 seasons now stands at:

31 – 28

….which is AVERAGE at best and the above records are exactly why Todd Graham is on the Hot Seat and needing 8 wins or 7 wins that includes a win over Arizona at a minimum to return as the Sun Devils in 2018.

Here is what Arizona State had left to play in 2017 with a record of 2 – 3 now:

Washington
At Utah
USC
Colorado
At UCLA
At Oregon State
Arizona

If Arizona State plays the way they played against Oregon and Stanford they have a CHANCE to win 7 or 8 games in 2017…But Frankly…we would be STUNNED if Arizona State won 7+ games in 2017 and if they don’t get at least 7 wins…

The Todd Graham-Era is Over in Tempe!

4. Mark Whipple, UMass – Mark Whipple’s UMass team has put up good fights the last two weeks against Tennessee and Ohio but with another loss Whipple’s record since returning to coach the Minuteman in 2014 now stands at…

8 – 28

No…that’s not good and why Mark Whipple finds himself on the Hot Seat at 0 – 6 on the season with these games still to be played:

Georgia Southern
Appalachian State
At Mississippi State
Maine
At BYU
At FIU

That looks like TWO wins for UMass in 2017 and probably a head coaching change for the Minuteman come December and maybe the folks at UMass should think about going back to the FCS level of football where they would probably be a powerhouse FCS program!

5. Bret Bielema, Arkansas – Bret Bielema and Arkansas got their MUST WIN Game or the Freaking Universe would have ended in Arkansas with a loss against New Mexico State on Saturday and now it’s back to Big Boy Football for the 2 – 2 Hogs who have these games left on the board:

At South Carolina
At Alabama
Auburn
At Ole Miss
Coastal Carolina
At LSU
Mississippi State
Missouri

Can Arkansas even get to 6 wins in 2017 in Bielema’s FIFTH year as the head coach of the Hogs?

We don’t see it which reminds us to remind everyone of Bret Bielema’s records at Arkansas in his FIVE years at the school:

Overall: 27 – 28

SEC: 10 – 23

Oh…below is Bret Bielema’s record against Power 5 Conference Schools in the last 5 years at Arkansas:

13 – 28

Oh…by the end of 2017 Arkansas will have ALREADY paid Bret Bielema…

$20+ Million Dollars

…and if they fired him in December they would own him an additional…

$15+ Million Dollars

That’s $35 Million Dollars for a coach that has a…

13 – 28

…record against Power 5 Conference Schools and…

10 – 23

…record in SEC Conference play!

Hell…Arkansas AD Jeff Long might just be Stupider than Joe Alleva and Alleva is one of the Stupidest Damn People alive on the Earth at this moment!

6. David Beaty, Kansas – Kansas had a bye in Week 5 but head coach David Beaty’s records at Kansas now stand at…

Overall: 3 – 25

Big 12: 1 – 18

…and YES Beaty has a buyout at Kansas that is….

$3 Million Dollars

…if fired and looking at the rest of KU’s schedule do you see any more wins for the Jayhawks in 2017?

Texas Tech
At Iowa State
At TCU
Kansas State
Baylor
At Texas
Oklahoma
At Oklahoma State

Hell…if Kansas can’t beat Baylor they will not win another game in 2017 BUT everything is fine with the Kansas football program….right?

NOT!

Try 4 wins in 3 seasons…even at Kansas…is nothing short of a Total Freaking Disaster and if you don’t believe that realize that in 2.5 years at Kansas Charlie Freaking Weis won…

6 games!

7. Barry Odom, Missouri – Barry Odom and Missouri had a bye in Week 5 and the 1 – 3 Tigers with only a win over Missouri State get back at it in Week 6 playing…

At Kentucky

…and if Missouri can’t beat Kentucky we rather doubt they will win a SEC Conference Game in 2017 playing the below remaining schedule:

At Kentucky
At Georgia
Idaho
At UConn
Florida
Tennessee
At Vanderbilt
At Arkansas

Hell…can Missouri beat Idaho and UConn? OK…let’s assume Mizzou beats Idaho and UConn that will be THREE wins in 2017 that will be ONE less win than the Tigers won in 2016 in Odom’s first year on the job!

Just for the record here’s our theory on firing college head football coaches or ANYONE in ANY position in ANY line of work….

You can either do the job or you can’t and usually within 90 days or at the most 1 year we know if you can do the job or not and certainly in 2 years ANY Athletic Director would know if his head football coach can do the job or not and if it’s a NO there’s no Damn reason to waste any more time waiting on that coach to figure out how to do a job he should have known how to do on Day One!

8. Mike Riley, Nebraska – We checked in again with our Nebraska-alum friends today (Sunday) in the Great State of Nebraska and they tell us that Mike Riley still has a chance to coach the Huskers in 2018 IF he can keep things rolling and one them even offered up the following:

“I think if Riley wins all his remaining games except one which would mean a 9 – 3 record he will be the head coach at Nebraska next season…Heck…he might even be able to squeak by with an 8 – 4 record and keep his job if none of the losses are blowouts. Nothing wrong with giving Mike Riley one more season if he wins 8 games with no embarrassing losses because that gives Scott Frost another year to hone his craft down in Orlando.”

OK…let’s see what Nebraska has left on their schedule now at 3 – 2 on the season:

Wisconsin
Ohio State
At Purdue
Northwestern
At Minnesota
At Penn State
Iowa

Can the Huskers go 5 – 2 the rest of way in 2017?

Not likely in our opinion but therein lies the Opportunity To Go Do Something Coach Riley and Great Luck To You Coach!

9. Jim Mora, UCLA – Clearly Jim Mora got a lot of effort from the Bruins in the Rose Bowl on Saturday night in beating Colorado which is an OK but certainly not Very Good or Great Buffs team and now the 3 – 2 Bruins need to keep things rolling with these games still to be played:

At Arizona
Oregon
At Washington
At Utah
Arizona State
At USC
California

Damn….that looks like a record of….

5 – 7
OR
6 – 6
OR
7 – 5

…in Jim Mora’s 6 th year at UCLA which isn’t anything much at all….even at UCLA!

10. Steve Addazio, Boston College – Steve Addazio and his BC team beat Central Michigan on Saturday to raise their record in 2017 to…

2 – 3

…and Addazio’s records at BC to…

Overall: 26 – 30

ACC: 11 – 23

…which is Beyond A Joke even at Boston College and the Eagles still have to play in 2017 games against…

Virginia Tech
At Louisville
At Virginia
Florida State
NC State
UConn
At Syracuse

Got 3, 4 or at the most 5 wins or Boston College in 2017 which is Steve Addazio’s FIFTH year the school?

Beyond A Joke BC!

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Arizona State, Arkansas, Barry Odom, Boston College, Bret Bielema, Butch Jones, Charlie Weis, David Beaty, Ed Orgeron, FCS, Jeff Long, Jim Mora, Joe Alleva, Kansas, LSU, Mark Whipple, Mike Riley, Missouri, Nebraska, Steve Addazio, Tennessee, Todd Graham, UCLA, UMass

The Les Miles and Ron Turner Firings on Sunday – Post Week 4 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – These Hot Seat Coaches Need to Understand Mr. Cash That When You Make Millions of Dollars A Year…Your Ass Will Either Perform Or End Up On The Hot Seat! Give ‘Em Hell Johnny!

Harry September 28, 2016 0 Comments

The Les Miles and Ron Turner Firings on Sunday

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Many of us here at Coaches Hot Seat were flying back to San Francisco from Los Angeles on Sunday after seeing Stanford come back and beat UCLA on Saturday night at the Rose Bowl and as we tweeted out on Sunday…

We were surprised but not shocked that LSU fired Les Miles

…because we believe Totally in the saying that now former Florida AD Jeremy Foley has said many times during his great career as AD in Gainesville…

“What will have to be done eventually should be done immediately.”

…and No Damn Doubt in our minds Les Miles should have been fired at the end of the 2016 season because in our opinion…

Les Miles is Incredibly Stubborn and would rather LSU Football lose football games than Miles EVER having to admit that he was wrong about ANYTHING

…and anyone with a working brain knows that Les Miles’ brand of football should be tossed on the scrapheap of college football history and anyone that is considering hiring Les Miles in the future should understand that reality Very Damn Clearly!

The Win/Loss Numbers for Les Miles over the past THREE seasons…2014 – 2016…are Very Damn Ugly Indeed when one considers that during the past THREE seasons Miles has had Top 5 talent in college football and those Win/Loss numbers are…

Overall: 19 – 10

SEC: 10 – 8

Power 5 Schools: 12 – 10

…which is nothing short of a Total and Complete Disaster when you have…

TOP FIVE TALENT in College Football at LSU

…which makes it in our opinion that LSU was 10 Months Late in firing Les Miles and in the end if might cost LSU….

Tom Herman to Texas or USC!

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Let’s leave the who will be the next head coach at LSU speculation for another day and give a Hearty Congratulations for Coach Ed Orgeron who is now the…

Head Football Coach at LSU

LSUTigerStadium

…and who we hope can win many of the remaining games the Tigers have against…

Missouri
At Florida
Southern Miss
Ole Miss
Alabama
At Arkansas
South Alabama
At Texas A&M

…especially since LSU has MORE talent on its roster than every team left on its schedule except for Alabama.

One thing that Coach O said that caught our attention in his press conference on Monday was that LSU was going to…

“Spend less time on the practice field and more time in the meeting rooms.”

….which is what Pete Carroll did at USC and which as former football players here at Coaches Hot Seat is something we have believed in for 30+ years now going back to the Bill Walsh days at Stanford the first-time around.

As the great Alabama head coach Frank Thomas, who played for Knute Rockne at Notre Dame and coached Paul “Bear” Bryant at Alabama, once said:

“Keep the players high. Make practice a pleasure, not a lark. Be a disciplinarian, but not a slave driver. It’s better to have a short, full practice than a long lazy one.”

Amen to that Coach Thomas….and Coach O as well!

Give ‘Em Hell Coach O…and just like at USC…we will be pulling for you Coach!

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On the Ron Turner firing at FIU it was no surprise to anyone here at Coaches Hot Seat that Ron Turner was fired in his FOURTH season at FIU where he put up records of…

Overall: 10 – 30

CUSA: 7 – 17

….because as we said when Ron Turner was hired…

FIU had no Damn Business hiring Ron Turner because if you are going to fire Mario Cristobal then you better Damn hire someone better than Cristobal and Ron Turner is not in the same world as Cristobal in coaching college football in the early part of the 21 st century…..PERIOD!

FIU should hire a young, fiery, smart, tenacious, hard-charging, fighting like Hell coach and just realize if the coach does a good job at FIU he will probably be off to a bigger job and then FIU should go out and hire another….

Young, fiery, smart, tenacious, hard-charging, fighting like Hell coach!

Do that FIU….just do that!

Post Week 4 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

A chair on fire... metaphor "In The Hot Seat"

These Hot Seat Coaches Need to Understand Mr. Cash That When You Make Millions of Dollars A Year…Your Ass Will Either Perform Or End Up On The Hot Seat! Give ‘Em Hell Johnny!

Post Week 4 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

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1. Clay Helton, USC – We spent several hours with an USC-alum friend of ours on this past Saturday night in Santa Monica after we watched Stanford come back and beat UCLA at the Rose Bowl and to say that our friend and many of his fellow USC-alum friends are PISSED-OFF about the current state of USC football would be a massive understatement!

Consider these numbers for a moment…since 2009 USC’s combined Pac-12 Conference record over the past 8 seasons now stands at…

40 – 25

…which includes USC head coaches Pete Carroll’s last year, Lane Kiffin, Ed Orgeron, Steve Sarkisian, and Clay Helton. Then consider the below numbers which is Alabama and Nick Saban’s record in SEC Conference play over the past 8 seasons…

48 – 8

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Why do we mention Nick Saban and Alabama’s record in SEC Conference play over the past 8 seasons you ask?

Because an USC-alum that could buy and sell most of the Westside of Los Angeles on any given afternoon has it written on a dry erase board in his home office and those two numbers….USC and Alabama’s conference records since 2009….was written on that dry erase board by someone who is fed-up with what is going on with USC football, and who is now going around Los Angeles briefing other USC alums about just what in the Hell is going to happen at USC if Clay Helton doesn’t get things turned around with the Trojans…and in a Helluva hurry!

Here are the important win/loss records at USC for Clay Helton as this moment:

Overall: 7 – 7

Pac-12: 5 – 3

The word we got from our USC-alum friend on Saturday night….

Clay Helton either wins 7 games in 2016…meaning USC will need to win 6 of its last 8 games this season…or the Clay Helton era at USC will be over shortly after the Notre Dame game on November 26.

Oh..Clay Helton better Damn beat UCLA and Notre Dame in getting those 7 wins!

Our opinion after talking to our USC-alum friend on Saturday night for a few hours:

Clay Helton better win 7-plus games or there is going to be a MEGA OFFER by USC to hire Tom Herman in 6 or so weeks that will make Herman the highest-paid coach in college football and with that in mind we would recommend that Helton’s Trojans beat Arizona State on Saturday night at the LA Coliseum!

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2. Steve Addazio, Boston College – Steve Addazio’s Boston College team beat Total Damn Cupcake Wagner on Saturday which raised the Eagles overall record in 2016 to…

2 – 2

….which leaves Addazio’s win/loss records in four seasons at…

Overall: 19 – 23

ACC: 8 – 18

…and on Saturday BC plays host to Buffalo in a game that we would recommend Steve Addazio NOT lose because if the Eagles did lose to a Buffalo team at home then Addazio might not be the BC coach by Noon on Sunday!

It’s all very simple for Steve Addazio in 2016 IF Boston College can beat Buffalo on Saturday:

Win at least 6 games and Addazio will get another season at BC.

Don’t win at least 6 games and the Boston College job will open up in late November…if not sooner!

CharlieStrong288118

3. Charlie Strong, Texas – Our Texas-alum friends are NOT Stupid and after Texas got beat by what many of us think is just an average California team coupled with Notre Dame’s defense being more porous than a 3-year old sponge Charlie Strong is now in a very dangerous spot where Charlie will either win several critical games coming up or he might be out of a job before the 2016 season is half over.

The numbers or Charlie Strong at Texas are very mediocre…

Overall: 13 – 15

Big 12: 9 – 9

…and even though we think the world of Charlie and are hoping he can turn Texas back into a college football power the TRUTH is that Notre Dame’s Total Damn Collapse has turned up the heat on Strong who is facing TWO CRITICAL games in the next TWO weeks…

At Oklahoma State
Oklahoma

….that with TWO losses could very well lead to Charlie Strong being shown the door before the Longhorns play Iowa State on October 15.

Oh Yes…Charlie Strong is in a very precarious situation and from what we have been told…

“Anything less than 8 wins in 2016 and Charlie is done….PERIOD!”

….because the Texas boys with very deep pockets are not going to be left on the outside looking in on the Tom Herman sweepstakes and if a change in the head coaching job at Texas has to be made and USC is offering Tom Herman…

$8 Million A Year

…the Texas Boys will go with…

$9 Million A Year!

Our recommendation to Charlie Strong:

Beat Oklahoma State on Saturday Charlie and for God’s Sake…start playing some Damn Defense!

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4. Tim DeRuyter, Fresno State – The numbers since Fresno State won the Mountain West Conference title for the second straight time in 2013 are very ugly indeed for Tim DeRuyter and his Bulldogs….since 2013 Fresno State’s records at…

Overall: 10 – 18

MWC: 7 – 13

…and a home loss to Tulsa in two overtimes on Saturday just made things that much worse and now it’s either…

Start Winning Some Football Games

…for Tim DeRuyter or there will be a new head football coach for Fresno State come sometime in December.

How many games does Tim DeRuyter need to win in 2016 to keep his job?

At least 6 games total Tim…at least 6 games.

Now at 1 – 3 on the season and these games still left to be played…

At UNLV
At Nevada
San Diego State
At Utah State
Air Force
At Colorado State
Hawaii
San Jose State

….can the Bulldogs win 5 of their last 8 games?

If they can’t then Tim DeRuyter NEEDS to be fired!

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5. Paul Haynes, Kent State – With the Alabama whipping of Kent State on Saturday Paul Haynes record coaching the Golden Flashes over the last FOUR seasons now stands at…

Overall: 10 – 29

MAC: 6 – 17

…and with KSU now at 1 – 3 on the 2016 season either Haynes will get his team to 6 wins in 2016 or Kent State will be looking for a new head coach come December.

Next up for Paul Haynes and Kent State…

Akron and head coach Terry Bowden at home on Saturday!

Good Luck with that Paul!

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6. Gus Malzahn, Auburn – We especially wanted to talk to some our Auburn friends after the Tigers close win over LSU on Saturday to get their opinions on the future of Gus Malzahn and it took until Tuesday afternoon to reach all of them and the general consensus among the Auburn alums we talked to is this…

Gus Malzahn will more than likely be back to coach at Auburn in 2017 IF the Tigers at least SEVEN games in 2016 and with that in mind and Auburn now sitting on a 2 – 2 record this season here is what AU have left to play:

La. Monroe
At Mississippi State
Arkansas
At Ole Miss
Vanderbilt
At Georgia
Alabama A&M
At Alabama

So Gus Malzahn has to win FIVE of his last EIGHT games to return as the Auburn coach in 2017 and he has…

TWO Total Damn Cupcakes in La. Monroe and Alabama A&M

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….so Malzahn has to win THREE of SIX games against…

At Mississippi State
Arkansas
At Ole Miss
Vanderbilt
At Georgia
At Alabama

Our opinion…if Gus Malzahn can’t win THREE of the above SIX games then he should be fired shortly after the Alabama game on November 26 because EVEN IF Malzahn finished at…

7 – 5

…in 2016 his win/loss records over the last THREE seasons…2014 – 2016….would stand at:

Overall: 22 – 16

SEC: 10 – 14

….and a coach at Auburn cannot possibly survive posting a record in SEC Conference play over three years of…

10 – 14

….right?

Hell…maybe the folks around and support Auburn Football are now willing to accept…

Average As Hell

….but then at Auburn a 10 – 14 SEC Conference record over three years isn’t even…

Average As Hell

….it’s MUCH WORSE!

Oh…if La. Monroe happened to beat Auburn on Saturday which is coached by Matt Viator who is a pretty Damn good football coach then we recommend the Alabama media pay close attention because we rather doubt that Gus Malzahn will be the head coach at Auburn by Noon on Sunday!

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7. Will Muschamp, South Carolina – Some…make that Many…will say that it’s crazy to have Will Muschamp on the Hot Seat in his first year at South Carolina BUT we have a couple of close friends that are South Carolina alumni who have plenty of friends who were…

None Too Happy About Will Muschamp’s Hiring at USC

…and who are more than willing to throw their weight around if the 2016 season should turn into a…

Total and Complete Disaster for Muschamp at USC

….and if you can’t beat Kentucky….the 2016 season has the potential to turn into a…

Total and Complete Disaster for Muschamp at USC!

Now at 2 – 2 on the season Will Muschamp and South Carolina still have 8 games left against…

Texas A&M
Georgia
UMass
Tennessee
Missouri
At Florida
Western Carolina
At Clemson

…and we would recommend…and we are pulling for Will Muschamp….to win at least…

THREE of the last EIGHT games

…because if for some reason South Carolina finishes the 2016 season with wins only over…

Vanderbilt
East Carolina
UMass
Western Carolina

….we could recommend folks keep their eyes on Columbia come late November…just saying!

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8. Brian Kelly, Notre Dame – One thing we tell our young employees is…

When you get into a position of power don’t be an Arrogant Ass

….because when you fail…and EVERYONE will fail at some time in their life….the people that sign your paychecks….

The Alumni, Boosters, and Fans of Notre Dame Football for Brian Kelly

….will be more likely to…

Kick Your Arrogant Ass to the Curb

…and that is what Brian Kelly is now facing if the 2016 season should turn into a Total and Complete Disaster after losses to Texas, Michigan State, and Duke to open the 2016 season.

Now at 1 – 3 the Non-Fighting Irish still have games against….

Syracuse
At NC State
Stanford
Miami
Navy
Army
Virginia Tech
At USC

….and it’s just a humble guess by the folks here at Coaches Hot Seat but we are thinking Notre Dame will win…

4….maybe 5…games in 2016

….and if Notre Dame wins 4…maybe 5…games in 2016…

Notre Dame will be looking for a new head football coach shortly after the USC game on November 26…

COUNT ON IT!

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9. Darrell Hazell, Purdue – Darrell Hazell and his Purdue football team got a nice win at home over Nevada on Saturday which leaves Hazell’s records in FOUR seasons at the school at…

Overall: 8 – 31

Big Ten: 2 – 22

….and we have it on what we call Very Damn Good Authority that if Hazell wins less than 6 games in 2016 Purdue will be looking for a new head football coach shortly after the Indiana game on September 26!

Up next for Darrell Hazell and Purdue….at Maryland which has a first year coach in his first head coaching job which is a game that Purdue and Hazell SHOULD win but will they…

Not Bloody Likely!

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10. Mark Stoops, Kentucky – We don’t know a whole lot of people around the University of Kentucky since we don’t follow college basketball like we do college football BUT we did reach what will call a “person of interest” in the Lexington area who told us on Monday of this week that…

“If Mark Stoops wins five games in 2016….Hell, maybe four games in 2016 he will be back to coach Kentucky next season.”

Geez…in your FOURTH year on the job at Kentucky you can win FOUR games and keep your job?

Well…this is Kentucky Football we are talking about here BUT with Kentucky now at 2 – 2 on the season and these games still to be played…

At Alabama
Vanderbilt
Mississippi State
At Missouri
Georgia
At Tennessee
Austin Peay
At Louisville

…can Mark Stoops and the Wildcats win just TWO of their last EIGHT games to save Mark Stoops job?

Now that is just Damn Silly that you can KEEP your job by winning TWO of your last EIGHT games but then can UK and Stoops even do that?

Maybe….Just Damn Maybe!

If Mark Stoops does win only 3 games in 2016…

Kentucky will be looking for a new head football coach shortly after Bobby Petrino and Louisville BEATS the Living Hell out of the Wildcats on November 26!

Uncategorized

Alabama, Auburn, Boston College, Brian Kelly, Charlie Strong, Clay Helton, Darrell Hazell, FIU, Fresno State, Gus Malzahn, Jay Jacobs, Johnny Cash, Kent State, Kentucky, Les Miles, LSU, Mark Stoops, Nick Saban, Notre Dame, Paul Haynes, Purdue, Ron Turner, South Carolina, Steve Addazio, Texas, Tim DeRuyter, USC, Will Muschamp

Post Week 3 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – It’s Early In The Season Yes…But That Doesn’t Mean Mr. Johnny Cash Isn’t Already Giving These Hot Seat Coaches Hell!

Harry September 19, 2016 0 Comments

Post Week 3 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

A chair on fire... metaphor "In The Hot Seat"

It’s Early In The Season Yes…But That Doesn’t Mean Mr. Johnny Cash Isn’t Already Giving These Hot Seat Coaches Hell!

Post Week 3 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

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1. Gus Malzahn, Auburn – The most shocking thing about the…

Fall of Gus Malzahn at Auburn

…is how Fast + Far the Fall has been and if one goes back to Saturday, October 4, 2014 which is the day that Auburn beat LSU at home by the score of…

41 – 7

….over the past two-plus seasons Gus Malzahn has posted TWO records that are nothing less than a…

Total and Complete Disaster at Auburn!

In Gus Malzahn’s Last 18 games against Power 5 Conference Schools his win/loss record is…

5 – 13

….and in Gus Malzahn’s Last 15 SEC Conference Games his win/loss record is…

4 – 11

Sorry….NO Coach can survive those kinds of records at Auburn and that means the BIGGEST game of Gus Malzahn’s coaching career is this coming Saturday night at home against an LSU team that is wobbling as well and also has a coach on the Hot Seat in Les Miles because very simply….

Gus Malzahn CANNOT Lose to LSU at home on Saturday night!

According to Tyler Thompson at Kentucky Sports Radio who did a nice breakdown of the current buyouts in the SEC…

Comparing Mark Stoops’ buyout to the rest of the SEC, Tyler Thompson, Kentucky Sports Radio

….Gus Malzahn’s buyout if fired at the end of the 2016 season would be…

$8.95 Million Dollars

….which is Beyond Damn Absurd although not as Absurd as the $12 Million Dollars that Kentucky would owe Mark Stoops if fired, and if we were in a position of power at Auburn University right now we would be wondering?

Who in the Hell is hiring and signing these Beyond Damn Absurd contracts with Auburn Head Football Coaches that would if Gus Malzahn is fired after this season lead to Auburn paying out…

North of $20 Million Dollars to buyout Tommy Tuberville, Gene Chizik and Gus Malzahn!

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That would be Auburn AD Jay Jacobs who is a Helluva nice man and talented college athletic sports administrator but unfortunately it seems that Jay like many ADs in FBS today have…

No Damn Respect for other people’s money meaning the Fans, Boosters, Alumni and anyone else that spends their hard-earned money on Auburn Football and Athletics!

Our opinion on the Auburn situation: If Auburn can’t beat what is a Very Average LSU team at home on The Plains the Tigers will be lucky to win…

6 Games in 2016!

Yes…it’s that bad at Auburn and someone at Auburn better have a Damn plan in place if the 2016 season melts down in the coming weeks!

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2. Steve Addazio, Boston College – Let this sink in for a moment…

In Steve Addazio’s 41 st game at Boston College in his FOURTH season on the job his BC football team just got beat…

49 – 0

….by a team in Virginia Tech with a first-year head coach in Justin Fuente who took over a Hokies team that won SIX games in the 2015 regular season!

There is NO DAMN EXCUSE for Steve Addazio to take a team to Blacksburg and lose 49 – 0 to what is still a finding-its-way Virginia Tech team and with that loss Steve Addazio’s records at BC dropped to…

Overall: 18 – 23

ACC: 8 – 18

….and over the last two seasons Steve Addazio is now sitting on a record of…

4 – 11!

Geez….you think things are coming apart at Boston College with the Eagles next REAL game after playing Cupcakes Wagner and Buffalo in the next two weeks being Clemson at home?

Yes…things are coming apart at Boston College and the word on the street in Boston where it seems BC-alums are finally coming to their senses before their football program goes in the totally in the toilet…

Anything less than 6 wins in 2016 and Steve Addazio is DONE come late November.

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3. Darrell Hazell, Purdue – Purdue has a bye in Week 3 and gets back to playing with a home game against Nevada on Saturday in a game that flat-out…

Darrell Hazell CANNOT Lose

….because a loss to Nevada to drop to 1 – 2 on the season with NINE Big Ten games left to play would be…

Forget Turning Out the Lights Because There is No Damn Electricity

….for the Purdue Boilermakers in 2016!

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4. Clay Helton, USC – It hasn’t been easy to reach our USC-alum friends especially as they let sink in that..

Stanford has won EIGHT of the last TEN games against USC

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….but we did get what we will call a Very Damn Influential USC-alum on the phone on Monday morning at his office overlooking the Pacific Ocean in Santa Monica and here is what he said about Clay Helton when asked…

“Clay Helton is a nice man but anything less than NINE wins this season and it’s over for Clay. We know (meaning USC-alums) we will have to raise a lot of money to get someone like Tom Herman, but we are determined to make USC football relevant again whatever the cost may be.”

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With the above in mind USC plays at Utah on Saturday and with a loss Clay Helton’s overall record coaching the Trojans would drop to…

7 – 7

…and we recommend to Clay Helton that…

Your Trojans BEAT Utah Son!

Oh…what is a “lot of money” in the mind of a Very Damn Influential USC-alum to hire someone like Tom Herman you ask?

$10M A Year meaning the Highest Paid Coach in College Football!

Yep…USC-alums are not happy and they are willing to take out their checkbooks to show just how unhappy they are with the current state of USC Football!

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5. Les Miles, LSU – Talk about what would be nothing less than a…

Total and Complete Disaster

…what if Les Miles LSU team went to Auburn this coming Saturday night and lost to Auburn team that looks like it has No Damn Clue what stadium it is playing in?

Oh that would be a…Total and Complete Disaster…which is why this Saturday’s LSU vs. Auburn game is one of those….

A CANNOT Lose Game for both Les Miles and Gus Malzahn

…with the losing coach being taken straight to Cape Kennedy after the game to be put on a rocket to launch him and his ass Straight Towards the Face of the Sun!

OK…we have seen LSU play against Wisconsin, Jacksonville State, and Mississippi State this year and the Tigers looked like a very AVERAGE football team in all three games and if one looks at what is left on LSU’s schedule…

At Auburn
Missouri
At Florida
Southern Miss
Ole Miss
Alabama
At Arkansas
South Alabama
At Texas A&M

…how many games can Les Miles and his football team realistically win in 2016?

We say…no more than EIGHT games and anything less than TEN wins and Les Miles is done come December and if LSU fans want to hire Tom Herman or Bobby Petrino for that matter they better like our USC-alum friends be ready to…

Write Some BIG Checks!

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6. Ron Turner, Florida International – With the FIU loss to UMass on Saturday head coach Ron Turner’s records at FIU now stand at…

Overall: 10 – 29

CUSA: 7 – 17

….an do we need to write any more about Ron Turner at FIU?

NO is the answer to that question!

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7. Mark Stoops, Kentucky – At first we thought it was an Internet Joke that Kentucky head coach Mark Stoops had a…

$12 Million Dollar Buyoutat Kentucky but as Tyler Thompson has shown doing some great research…

Comparing Mark Stoops’ buyout to the rest of the SEC, Tyler Thompson, Kentucky Sports Radio

…that $12 Million Dollar buyout DO BE TRUE which again shows that another AD…this time Kentucky AD Mitch Barnhart…doesn’t…

Know His Ass From the Side of a Barn

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….because when Mark Stoops was given this Totally Damn Absurd Contract and Buyout…

Mark Stoops had done NOTHING to have earned such a RICH payout

…but then don’t feel bad Mitch Barnhart…

College Athletics is riddled with Total Damn Complete Moron ADs that seem to love giving away Other People’s Hard-Earned Money!

With Kentucky’s come from behind win over woeful New Mexico State on Saturday Mark Stoops records at UK now stand at…

Overall: 13 – 26

SEC: 4 – 21

….and with these games still left on the Wildcats schedule…

South Carolina
At Alabama
Vanderbilt
Mississippi State
At Missouri
Georgia
At Tennessee
Austin Peay
At Louisville

….we don’t see Kentucky winning more than…

FOUR Games in 2016

…and even though Kentucky would owe Mark Stoops the Totally Damn Absurd…

$12 Million Dollars

…if fired after the season how could Kentucky keep on a head football coach that won…

FOUR Games in his FOURTH season on the job?

They COULD NOT is the answer to that question!

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8. Charlie Strong, Texas – A few Coaches Hot Seat members were at the Texas – Cal game at Memorial Stadium on Saturday night and the word they brought back to us on Sunday was that….

Texas let the Cal wide-receivers run wild and didn’t pressure the Bears QB

…and if you allow that to happen with ANY spread-passing offensive attack as Cal…and many Big 12 schools now run….you are going to give up a Helluva LOT of points and…

Giving up 50 Points to Cal when Cal only scored 51 on woeful Hawaii and only 40 on San Diego State

…is not only Not Freaking Acceptable is it borderline a Firing Offense when you are in your THIRD season on the job as Charlie Strong is at Texas.

The Problem that Charlie Strong is now facing is that many schools in the Big 12 play an offense just like Cal’s and Charlie better get the Texas Defense fixed and quick because look what’s coming up for the Horns…

At Oklahoma State
Oklahoma
Iowa State
At Kansas State
Baylor
At Texas Tech
West Virginia
At Kansas
TCU

Hell…if Texas plays like they did against Cal the rest of the season the Horns will win….

FIVE…Maybe SIX Games in 2016 and if that happens…

Charlie Strong will NOT be the head coach at Texas come December….PERIOD!

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9. Tim DeRuyter, Fresno State – Since Tim DeRuyter and his Fresno State football team won the Mountain West Conference in 2013 his Bulldogs have posted records over the past three seasons of…

Overall: 10 – 19

MWC: 7 – 9

…and the proud folks that support Fresno State football are just NOT going to tolerate that kind of football for much longer and thus why Tim DeRuyter better get things turned around in the Valley or he will be out of a job at the end of this season.

Now at 1 – 2 on the season and looking at what is left on Fresno State’s schedule in 2016…

Tulsa
At UNLV
At Nevada
San Diego State
At Utah State
Air Force
At Colorado State
Hawaii
San Jose State

…there is NO reason for the Bulldogs to win less than…

SEVEN Games in 2016

…and SEVEN Wins in 2016 is probably what DeRuyter needs to keep his job at Fresno State!

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10. Paul Haynes, Kent State – Hey, Hey, Hey…Kent State and head coach Paul Haynes got a win on Saturday against Monmouth which is enough to temper much of the enthusiasm for the win….especially when one sees who the Golden Flashes are playing next…

Alabama in Tuscaloosa!

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Uhhhh…Good Luck with that Paul Haynes!

Paul Hayne’s win/loss records in FOUR seasons at Kent State:

Overall: 10 – 28

MAC: 6 – 17

Make that 10 – 29 with the Crimson Tide looming!

Uncategorized

Alabama, Auburn, Boston College, Clay Helton, Coaches Hot Seat, Coaches Hot Seat Rankings, Darrell Hazell, FIU, Fresno State, Gus Malzahn, Jay Jacobs, Kent State, Kentucky Charlie Strong, Les Miles, LSU, Mark Stoops, Mitch Barnhart, Paul Haynes, Purdue, Ron Turner, Steve Addazio, Texas, Tim DeRuyter, USC

We Got The Flat-Ass Skinny on Les Miles Status at LSU When We Were in Ponte Vedra Beach, Florida for The Players Championship Last Week From A Buddy of Ours From Baton Rouge and We Have Some News For Les Miles —> Either Win BIG Son Or You Are DONE Down on the Bayou!

Harry May 17, 2016 0 Comments

We here at Coaches Hot Seat waited until The Players Championship which many of us attended this past week in Ponte Vedra Beach, Florida to write about Les Miles in 2016 because we knew that one of our good buddies from Baton Rouge would be joining us at the beach and that we would get the…

Flat-Ass Skinny on Les Miles Status at LSU

….and as they say in the Bayou…

That Is Exactly Damn What We Got!

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A Helluva lot has been written about Les Miles near dismissal as the head football coach at LSU last November, but let’s cut through the Bullshit and get the following down on the barrelhead:

If the state of Louisiana have had a pot to piss in Les Miles would have lost his job last November…PERIOD!

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In the end it was the FACT that the state of Louisiana was flat-broke last November that save Les Miles Precious Ass and with thousands of folks in Louisiana hurting it would have looked very Damn bad to have sent Les Miles packing with a $18 Million Dollar buyout and there you have why Les Miles is still the head coach at LSU today.

As for the reasons why Les Miles should have been fired last November let’s go Joe Friday and give you a Helluva good reason why Les Miles is very Damn lucky to have a head coaching job in Baton Rouge today:

Since LSU lost to Alabama in the 2011 – 2012 Bogus BCS National Championship Game in New Orleans which encompasses the last FOUR college football seasons Les Miles has put up records of…

Overall: 37 – 14

SEC: 20 – 12

OK…those aren’t bad Overall and SEC Win/Loss records over the past FOUR seasons for Les Miles at LSU…BUT….let’s go Joe Friday again and say this time…

Just The Facts Ma’am

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….because we are talking about LSU Football here where Bozo the Clown could recruit Top 10 Recruiting Classes each year and where Les Miles has averaged over the last EIGHT seasons signing the…

No. 7 Recruiting Class in American according to Rivals.com

Oh….but if you are landing Top 10 Recruiting Classes on a regular basis…as Les Miles has done at LSU…one would think that your Win/Loss records against teams with .500 or better records would be pretty Damn good…right?

RIGHT…but NOT for Les Miles folks!

Let’s bring Joe Friday in with the FACTS and as they say on the Bayou…these FACTS are not pretty!

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In the last FOUR seasons Les Miles LSU Football Teams have played….

34 Games against FBS teams with .500 or better records and Les Miles’ record in those 34 games is…

19 – 15 (.559)

In the last FOUR seasons Les Miles LSU Football Teams have played…

29 Games in the SEC against teams with .500 or better records and Les Miles’ record in those 29 games is…

16 – 13 (.552)

Oh…that’s bad enough if not outright Very Damn Embarrassing for LSU Football….BUT….did we mention that Les Miles LSU Football Teams have lost…

FIVE straight games to Nick Saban and Alabama?

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So here is what you have on your hands now fans of LSU football….

You have a head coach in Les Miles that not only has lost FIVE straight games to Nick Saban and Alabama but you have a head coach in Les Miles that is making over $4 Million Dollars A Year posting winning percentages against teams with .500 or better records of…

Overall against .500 or better teams = .559

SEC against .500 or better teams = .552

Uhhh…got that is A Damn Joke Les Miles and by all rights your Ass Should Have Been Run Out of Baton Rouge and WOULD have been run out of Baton Rouge last November if…

The State of Louisiana had not been Dead Damn Broke!

Now let’s get back to the….

Flat-Ass Skinny on Les Miles Status at LSU

…that our buddy from Baton Rouge gave us in Ponte Vedra Beach, Florida this past week which is…

“Les Miles HAS TO beat Alabama and win the SEC West in 2016 or he will not be employed at LSU in early December.”

Well Hell…that’s about as….

Flat-Ass Skinny on Les Miles Status at LSU

…that one can get and with that mind let’s go to LSU’s 2016 Football Schedule to see if Les Miles is indeed looking at his last season down on the Bayou:

Wisconsin – Lambeau Field
Jacksonville State
Mississippi State
At Auburn
Missouri
At Florida
Southern Miss
Ole Miss
Alabama
At Arkansas
South Alabama
At Texas A&M

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Well…Bozo the Clown or any Coonass in Louisiana…a term that Nick Saban knows well…could win…

4 Games coaching LSU in 2016

….but the question is how many games will Les Miles win in 2016 or rather the question is can Les Miles and his LSU Football Team BEAT Alabama and win the SEC West Division to save Les Miles job?

Not A Damn Chance in Hell….in our humble opinion!

How many games will Les Miles win in 2016….in our humble opinion?

7..maybe 8 Wins…for Les Miles and his LSU Football Team in 2016

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And if that happens as the Great Dandy Don Meredith used to say…or rather sing….

Turn Out the Lights on Les Miles Ass on the Bayou!

Uncategorized

Alabama, Coonass, Florida, Les Miles, Louisiana, LSU, Nick Saban, Ponte Vedra Beach, SEC

Post Week 2 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 21 – 30 Hot Seat Coaches – Keep Giving These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

Harry September 15, 2015 0 Comments

Keep Giving These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Mr. Cash!

Post Week 2 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

21. David Shaw, Stanford – As a dozen or so Coaches Hot Seat members sat in Stanford Stadium on Saturday night watching Stanford whip Hapless and it seemed almost Coachless UCF an interesting observation was made by one CHS member:

“Is it just me or do the Stanford football players seem to going back to the size physically they were (which was puny) when Walt Harris was run off The Farm and replaced with Jim Harbaugh in 2007?”

This idea that the Stanford football players are getting increasingly smaller under head coach David Shaw compared to the size they were under Jim Harbaugh and in the first couple of years of the Shaw reign has been a topic of hushed discussion for over a year now among a small group of Coaches Hot Seat members which blew-up into a wide ranging discussion on Saturday night with lots of comments thrown in from the peanut gallery like…..

“How small the Stanford football players seemed at fan day in August. Hell, my boy in the ninth grade was bigger than half the Stanford team!”

“How it seems the Stanford football players are losing rather than gaining weight year-over year under David Shaw.”

“Doesn’t it seem like the Stanford football players are less cut, less in shape looking and overall not in the condition they were in during the Jim Harbaugh years?”

What was the final conclusion to this discussion you ask among the participating Coaches Hot Seat members which included a couple of CHS Members chiming-in from their hotel room in Knoxville, Tennessee?

Stanford football IS GETTING SMALLER and LESS PHYSICAL overall under David Shaw and all it takes for one to understand this FACT is for anyone to watch a tape of the Northwestern game from this season to see a smaller team in Northwestern push Stanford around all over the field on the way to a 16 – 6 win over the Cardinal.

Of course, the proof is ALWAYS in the pudding as someone once said and this week Stanford plays at USC which has ALWAYS had larger and stronger players across the board than Stanford but for a few seasons during the Jim Harbaugh years there was a time when USC was flat-out…

Intimidated by Stanford Football

….which culminated in 2009 Stanford – USC game at the LA Coliseum when the Cardinal led Jim Harbaugh team CRUSHED the Trojans by the score of…

55 – 21!

Unfortunately USC has won the last two games in the Stanford – USC series and it will be fascinating to see what the Trojans are able to do with Stanford at the LA Coliseum on Saturday in Steve Sarkisian’s second year as the head coach at USC after narrowly beating the Cardinal 13 – 10 last season on The Farm.

Will Stanford get pushed around by a team in USC that has five to six times as much talent as Northwestern which thoroughly dominated Stanford in the first game of the season or is there something…..anything….that David Shaw can do to get the Cardinal offense on track before the Pac-12 schedule really cranks up with several teams on the schedule that can easily score 30 or more points a game which would leave the pitiful Stanford offense in the dust?

We shall all see on Saturday night with a decent amount of Coaches Hot Seat members traveling to Los Angeles for the Stanford – USC game at one of our favorite venues to watch football games the LA Coliseum which a few Coaches Hot Seat members have been watching football games at for almost 40 years now. Needless to say with the remaining games on Stanford’s schedule as listed below…

At USC
At Oregon State
Arizona
UCLA
Washington
At Washington State
At Colorado
Oregon
California
Notre Dame

….there is a REAL chance that Stanford does NOT win 6 games in 2015 if they play like they did against Northwestern and of course if Stanford doesn’t win 6 games in 2015 Stanford WILL be looking for a new head football coach come December for Damn sure!

22. Curtis Johnson, Tulane – Curtis Johnson is now in his fourth season coaching the Tulane Green Wave and has posted win/loss records of…

Overall: 12 – 27

CUSA: 9 – 15

….with ONE winning season and bowl game in the books in his first three seasons.

Is Tulane the kind of place that should expect to be playing .500 or better football on a regular basis?

We sure the Hell don’t know why not and after Tulane started the 2015 season with losses to Duke and Georgia Tech the Green Wave has these games left on the schedule:

Maine
UCF
At Temple
Houston
At Navy
At Memphis
UConn
At Army
At SMU
Tulsa

Hmmm…..with the above games remaining is there anyone that believes Tulane will win at least 6 games in 2015?

Didn’t think so which takes us to…

Coach up your team Curtis Johnson or the Hot Seat will just get HOTTER!

23. Kliff Kingsbury, Texas Tech – What a PERFECT opportunity Saturday is for…

Pretty Boy Kingsbury

….to both get Coaches Hot Seat off his back, have us drop the Pretty Boy Kingsbury moniker FOREVER, and get a win for Texas Tech football when the Red Raiders travel to Fayetteville on Saturday to play an Arkansas team that is coming off a loss to Toledo and is according to our buddies in Ft. Smith, Arkansas…

In Total and Complete Disarray Right Now

….with people in Fayetteville pointing fingers at who was responsible for the Toledo loss and therein lies the…

PERFECT opportunity for Pretty Boy Kingsbury and his Red Raiders!

Can Texas Tech really go into Fayetteville and beat an Arkansas team coached by someone (Bret “Ohio State LOVES THEIR CUPCAKES” Bielema) who it seems is more interested in who Ohio State is playing each week (Northern Illinois) than in getting his team ready to play football games?

YES is that answer to that question and a loss in this spot for Bret Bielema to Texas Tech would not only get Pretty Boy Kingsbury OFF the Hot Seat it would send Bret “Anyone seen Urban Meyer eating CUPCAKES today” Bielema into a close orbit around the Sun for the foreseeable future with the SEC Conference schedule still ahead!

Memo to Pretty Boy Kingsbury: If you score 35 points in this game you will beat Arkansas and YES if you beat Arkansas on Saturday we will drop the Pretty Boy Kingsbury moniker FOREVER! Signed: Coaches Hot Seat

Good Luck Pretty Boy!

24. Les Miles, LSU – With wins over Mississippi State AND Auburn Les Miles has an opportunity to go from the frying pan to the catbird seat if LSU can get a win over a Totally Hapless Auburn team in Baton Rouge on Saturday and consider this for a moment that IF LSU can beat Auburn the Tigers will then have the below games left on their schedule before they play at Alabama on November 7:

At Syracuse
Eastern Michigan
At South Carolina
Florida
Western Kentucky

Hell, if LSU can beat Mississippi State and Auburn we see no reason why LSU can’t roll through their next FIVE games and show up in Tuscaloosa on November 7 at….

7 – 0

….to play the Crimson Tide BUT hold it just a second…after Alabama the Tigers still have to play…

Arkansas
At Ole Miss
Texas A&M

….so even if LSU was 7 – 0 on November 7 Les Miles could still lose his last 4 games and end the 2015 season at…

7 – 4

….and rightfully get his ass run out of Baton Rouge come December!

Up first though before Les Miles possibly gets his ass run out of Baton Rouge in December is the Auburn Tigers in Tiger Stadium and don’t tell anyone Les because what we are about to tell you is just between you Les and us here at Coaches Hot Seat:

Coaches Hot Seat whispering through the computer to Les Miles: “Our contact at Auburn tells us the Auburn coaching staff is in full-on panic mode right now because they know and Gus Malzahn knows that if Auburn loses to LSU on Saturday and Malzahn drops to 10 – 7 in his last 17 games that Malzahn’s ass will be on fire and on the Hot Seat!”

Good Luck Mad Hatter and OH…if you lose to Auburn at home in Tiger Stadium when Auburn is in “full-on panic mode” your precious ass will be climbing back up the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings!

25. Dana Holgorsen, West Virginia – Dana Holgorsen and West Virginia got their CUPCAKE win on Saturday over Liberty University which is where that Total Nutcake Bernie Sanders was speaking on Monday but we will say about Bernie Sanders that even though he is a Total Nutcake at least he is a Total Nutcake with personal principles that he sticks to whether you disagree with him or not!

Getting back to Dana Holgorsen and West Virginia Crazy Boy Holgorsen has a chance to get his ass off the Hot Seat next week with a win against Maryland at home on September 26 which would be nice since WVU travels to play at Oklahoma in their fourth game of the season after the Terps come to Morgantown.

For now though with West Virginia having an off-week Crazy Boy Dana Holgorsen remains on the Hot Seat right where Crazy Boy belongs!

26. Kirk Ferentz, Iowa – Kirk Ferentz and Iowa got a nice win at Iowa State on Saturday but then…

Iowa State has LOST 21 of their last 26 games

…so beating Iowa State is akin to beating a Ladies Senior Citizen Bridge Club’s auxiliary football team that meets on every Tuesday night in a suburb of Des Moines, Iowa so we hope that fans of Iowa football aren’t getting too confident after a win over the Cyclones especially with Pitt coming to town on Saturday.

We will tell everyone why a loss to Pitt on Saturday would be especially devastating to Kirk Ferentz and Iowa:

Pat Narduzzi is in his first year as a head coach at Pitt or as a head coach anywhere and if Pat Narduzzi can in his third game as a head coach roll into Iowa and beat the Hawkeyes on the road where exactly does that leave Iowa football under Kirk Ferentz?

Right in the septic tank on the farm is where that leaves Iowa football under Kirk Ferentz!

27. Mike Riley, Nebraska – Several Coaches Hot Seat members have been traveling to the Great State of Nebraska for over two decades on business and thus we have had a long love affair going with Nebraska and the Good People of that state and even when we put Mike Riley on the Hot Seat we have done so reluctantly since Mike Riley is a lot like the Good People of Nebraska in that Riley is almost…

Impossible NOT to like

….but this is Coaches Hot Seat and when you are the head coach at Nebraska you have to win “X” number of games to stay OFF the Hot Seat and thus why this Saturday’s game at Miami is so Damn important for Mike Riley and Nebraska football as they head towards Big Ten Conference play.

Of course, this Nebraska – Miami game is also very important for Hurricanes head coach Al Golden and thus we have set-up here in South Florida a..

Hot Seat vs. Hot Seat Coaching Match-Up

….with the winning coach getting his ass off the Hot Seat for now and the losing coaching getting the heat turned up on his ass Come Monday….

….and no doubt many times in the future during the rest of this college football season as well.

Good Luck to Mike Riley and Al Golden in this Hot Seat vs. Hot Seat Coaches game!

28. Mike MacIntyre, Colorado – Mike MacIntyre and Colorado got a nice win over UMass at home in Boulder on Saturday and now the Buffs face a CRITICAL game against Colorado State on Saturday which is a match-up that Colorado MUST WIN with the Pac-12 conference schedule looming over their shoulders and with the first Pac-12 game against Oregon in Boulder on October 3.

Can Colorado beat Colorado State on Saturday to get Mike MacIntyre off to a 2 – 1 start with Nicholls State up next which should be 3 – 1 before the Buffs start Pac-12 play against Oregon on October 3?

We don’t see why the Hell not!

29. Larry Fedora, North Carolina – Larry Fedora and North Carolina got a win over CUPCAKE North Carolina A&T on Saturday and now getting back to Big Boy College Football UNC will host Illinois on Saturday in Chapel Hill which is being coached by interim head coach Bill Cubit.

Yep…North Carolina CANNOT lose to this Illinois team that was in Complete and Total Disarray just a few weeks ago because a loss in this spot to drop to 1 – 2 with the below schedule still looming…

Delaware
At Georgia Tech
Wake Forest
Virginia
At Pitt
Duke
Miami
At Virginia Tech
NC State

…would put both Fedora and the Tar Heels in a precarious position as ACC Conference play gets underway on October 3 with a game at Georgia Tech.

Memo to SPF which is short for Six Pack Fedora here at Coaches Hot Seat: DO NOT LOSE TO Illinois! Signed: Coaches Hot Seat

30. Frank Beamer, Virginia Tech – Frank Beamer and the Hokies loaded-up on a CUPCAKE this past Saturday with a win over Furman and now it is back to reality for Virginia Tech with a game at Purdue in Week 3 in what is for Damn sure…

A MUST WIN Game for Frank Beamer and Virginia Tech

….because a loss in this spot to a Purdue football team that has won FIVE total football games the past three seasons would be nothing short of a Complete Freaking Disaster and fully reveal the current….

Hapless State of Virginia Tech Football

….which in what may be Frank Beamer’s last season in Blacksburg is certainly something that Coach Beamer does not want to be fully revealed for all the world to see.

With a game at East Carolina in Week 4 a loss to Purdue might just lead to the Hokies starting the 2015 season at…

1 – 3

….and fighting for their lives just to get to a pitiful bowl game and is a mediocre season and pitiful bowl game really how Frank Beamer wants to go out at Virginia Tech after a legendary coaching career?

NO is the answer to that question and thus YES Virginia Tech had better Damn beat Purdue!

Uncategorized

Al Golden Miami, Arkansas, Bret Bielema, Curtis Johnson, Dana Holgorsen, David Shaw, Frank Beamer, Iowa, Jim Harbaugh, Kirk Ferentz, Kliff Kingsbury, Larry Fedora, Les Miles, LSU, Mike Riley, Nebraska, North Carolina, Stanford, Steve Sarkisian, Texas Tech, Tulane, USC, Virginia Tech, West Virginia

10 College Football Head Coaches That CANNOT LOSE In Week 2 – Steely Dan Singing Deacon Blues – Bob Stoops and the “Hungry Meter” for College Football Head Coaches

Harry September 11, 2015 0 Comments

We are introducing a new feature at Coaches Hot Seat for the 2015 football season and beyond…the….

10 College Football Head Coaches That CANNOT LOSE In Week “X”

…..and to introduce this feature we will use a song from the 1970s Super Band Steely Dan…

Deacon Blues

“They got a name for the winners in the world….I want a name when I lose…they call Alabama the Crimson Tide….call me Deacon Blues…Deacon Blues.”

Enjoy the GREAT Steely Dan singing Deacon Blues!

10 College Football Head Coaches That CANNOT LOSE In Week 2

1. Kevin Wilson, Indiana vs. FIU – After the close 1-point win over FCS team Southern Illinois in Week 1 there is just no way in Hell that Kevin Wilson’s Hoosiers can lose to FIU at home this week because a loss in this spot to a pitiful team from South Florida…

No…not the Miami Hurricanes

…would send Wilson’s ass into a part of the Universe that is Hotter than our Sun and last time we checked the Sun is pretty Damn HOT!

2. Paul Rhoads, Iowa State vs. Iowa – In Paul Rhoads last 25 games at Iowa State his Cyclones have posted the downright startling and depressing win/loss record of…

5 – 20

….and rightly so Paul Rhoads’ ass is now hotter than that coffee that some Idiot spilled on himself and sued McDonald’s about years ago and won BIG which we seem to recall was Pretty, Pretty Hot Coffee which means a loss in this spot to the Iowa Hawkeyes and fellow Hot Seat coach Kirk Ferentz would be nothing short of a…

Complete Freaking Disaster!

3. Kirk Ferentz, Iowa vs. Iowa State – Consider this in the Total Disaster that Iowa Football has become in recent years under the $4 Million Dollar Per Year Man Kirk Ferentz:

In Iowa’s last 40 games the $4 Million Dollar Per Year Man Kirk Ferentz has posted a win/loss record of…

20 – 20!

That’s right the University of Iowa….or rather the fans of Iowa Football and in many ways collectively college football fans across America that watch all of these college football games on TV have collectively paid Kirk Ferentz over the past four football seasons something on the order of….

$15 Million Dollars

….for 20 Stinking Wins which works out to the amazing number…

$750,000 Per Freaking Win!

Seriously…you CANNOT make this kind of stuff up and thus why Kirk Ferentz and his Iowa Hawkeyes CANNOT lose to Iowa State on Saturday because if they do the above number goes up to….

$800,000 Per Freaking Win!

Hell, if Kirk Ferentz keeps up this Mediocre Football at Iowa by the end of the 2015 college football season he could be getting paid something on the order of…

$1,000,000 Per Freaking Win!

…and that’s good money IF you can find people STUPID enough to pay that kind of money for MEDIOCRITY which Kirk Ferentz has found in the state of Iowa IN SPADES!

4. Charlie Strong, Texas vs. Rice – Anyone that has read the Coaches Hot Seat Blog over the past EIGHT college football seasons knows that we have some good fishing and hunting buddies in the Austin, Texas area who are Texas grads and love showing us “City Boys” what life is like in the Republic of Texas while hunting and fishing and every so often we haul those “Texas Boys” up to Montana to show them what life is like when you really go into backcountry where the trout are large and the grizzly bears will eat your ass if you are not careful!

Getting back to the subject at hand which is….

The Rolling and Raging On Fire Wagon Train

…that is now Texas football we asked our Austin fishing and hunting buddies what the temperature was down in Texas relative to Charlie Strong and Texas football and their replay was…

“Let’s just say that if Texas loses to Rice on Saturday night Charlie Strong’s house could be on the market and sold before the Horns play Cal the next Saturday!”

Uhhhhh….we would call that the temperature of some wings we used to eat at a chicken wing place in Jacksonville Beach, Florida when a few of us were serving in the US Navy that were the Hottest Damn Wings we have ever put in our mouths and the very simple one word name for those wings was:

“Chernobyl”

This is very simple….Charlie Strong and Texas CANNOT lose to Rice on Saturday night…PERIOD.

5. Al Golden, Miami vs. FAU – If there is ONE coach in college football that knows he MUST produce in 2015 meaning win a Helluva lot of football games it is Miami’s head coach Al Golden and in Week 2 Golden and his Hurricanes play Florida Atlantic on Friday night and a loss in this spot with these SIX games up next…

Nebraska
At Cincinnati
At Florida State
Virginia Tech
At Clemson
At Duke

…would be nothing short of a Complete Freaking Disaster and send Al Golden’s ass onto the face of an O Class Star which in case you didn’t know…

Is One Helluva Hot Place for your ass to be sitting on!

6. Les Miles, LSU vs. Mississippi State – We don’t have any fishing and hunting buddies in the state of Louisiana but we have heard that if LSU loses to Mississippi State on Saturday night that Les Miles will not be traveling back to Baton Rouge with the LSU football team but will instead be taken immediately to Cape Kennedy in Florida where several influential LSU boosters have arranged to have Les Miles and his ass launched on a NASA rocket to…

Calvera the closest neutron star to Earth which is approximately 250 to 1000 light-years from Earth

….which it will take The Mad Hatter several million years to reach and we have also heard that in order to really stick-it-to Les Miles during the entire trip to Calvera those LSU boosters have arranged it so Les Miles will be forced watch a continuous loop replay of the January 2011 BCS Title Game loss to Alabama which most agree was the…

Boringest College Football Game of All Time!

Memo to Les Miles: Don’t Lose to Mississippi State!

7. David Shaw, Stanford vs. UCF – A few Coaches Hot Seat members were on a conference call this week with a “non-athletic related contact” of ours on the Stanford campus who keeps his ears to the ground for us on The Farm since we have to work for a living and cannot hang around the Stanford Athletic Complex and whip the football team into shape which this Stanford football team needs desperately and our “non-athletic related contact” at Stanford said something very Damn interesting on our weekly conference call:

“If Stanford loses to UCF on Saturday there is a very good chance that Stanford doesn’t win 6 games this season because of how fragile and weak this team is and how tough the remaining schedule is.”

Hmmmm….this Stanford football team is “fragile and weak?”

Yep…that was our opinion of the Stanford football team we saw in August on The Farm although our term of…

Balsa Wood Stanford Candy Asses

…for this the 2015 Stanford football team seems to be a little more on the nose to us!

Let’s look at Stanford’s remaining games in 2015

UCF
At USC
At Oregon State
Arizona
UCLA
Washington
At Washington State
At Colorado
Oregon
California
Notre Dame

Yep…if Stanford cannot beat UCF which just lost to FIU on their home field then…

There is NO WAY IN HELL that Stanford gets close to 6 wins this season which would further validate what we have seen happen in recent years that has turned the once Very Damn Tough Stanford Football Program into the…

Balsa Wood Stanford Candy Asses

…that will fold-up like a cheap tent bought from Wal-Mart if even the slightest gust of wind hits the campground on The Farm in this case!

YES….UCF is a CANNOT lose game for Stanford head coach David Shaw but then when the cake has already been mixed and baked there isn’t a Helluva lot that one can do to that cake once it is sitting on the counter of the kitchen!

8. Mike Leach, Washington State vs. Rutgers – With Washington State about to look down the pipe of NINE Pac-12 Conference Games that will ALL be very difficult wins for the Cougars if there is a game that Mike Leach and his WSU football team needs to win it is this Saturday’s game against Rutgers because a loss in this spot to fall to 0 – 2 on the season and it will next to impossible for Washington State to get to 6 wins in 2015 and that would make…

Three Out of Four Losing Seasons for Mike Leach at Washington State

YES…beating Rutgers is CRITICAL for Mike Leach and the Cougs!

9. Bob Stoops, Oklahoma vs. Tennessee – There is no doubt in our minds that Oklahoma head coach Bob Stoops would like to get the Sooners back into the running for a National Championship before he is politely told that his services are no longer needed in Norman since being just a little better than average is eventually not going to cut it at OU even for Bob Stoops, BUT when you talk to people around Norman and we mean folks that have some insight….not total insight but some insight….into what is going on the feeling that used to pervade Oklahoma football under Stoops….

That Dammit We ARE Going To Win Big 12 Championships and National Titles or Die Trying

….just NO LONGER EXISTS in Norman and there in a nutshell is what is wrong with OU football.

We are always coming up with new ways to rank college football head coaches here at Coaches Hot Seat and one way we came up with this past Summer was the “Hungry Meter” meaning on a 1 to 10 scale how “Hungry” is EVERY college football head coach to win Games, Championships and National Titles either at his current school or a bigger school if a great job opportunity presented itself. We have been tossing around the idea of publishing our opinion on the “Hungry Level” for each college football head coach BUT it is such a subjective opinion based on admitted less-than-perfect information we have held it back….so far.…BUT we will tell you of what “Hungry Level” we have OU head coach Bob Stoops at on a 1 to 10 scale to win Games, Championships and a National Title with the Sooners which is of course just our opinion:

Bob Stoops was a “10” on the “Hungry Meter” from 2001 to 2008

Bob Stoops was a “9” on the “Hungry Meter” from 2009 to 2011

Bob Stoops was an “8” on the “Hungry Meter” from 2012 to 2014

Bob Stoops current rating on the “Hungry Meter” = 7.8

In our opinion here at Coaches Hot Seat ANY college football head coach who has a rating of less than “9.5” on the Coaches Hot Seat “Hungry Meter” in today’s incredibly Damn competitive college football landscape has NO DAMN CHANCE to win a Conference Championships and National Titles.

Two Coaches Hot Seat members will be traveling up from Atlanta to Knoxville on Saturday for the Oklahoma – Tennessee game and they will report back on what they see from Bob Stoops and the Sooners….and our guess is….OU loses to Tennessee and ends up with 7 or 8 wins on the season and Bob Stoops is DONE at Oklahoma come December either in reality meaning no longer the head coach at OU or just a coach going through the motions hauling down millions of dollars a year for “X” number of years into the future.

Just our opinion.

10. Brian Kelly, Notre Dame vs. Virginia – Of course both Brian Kelly and Virginia head coach Mike London BADLY need a win in this spot BUT this is a game that Brian Kelly CANNOT lose after the Week 1 crushing of the Hapless Texas Longhorns that are still the Texas Longhorns even though they are now Hapless with a Capital “H” under Charlie Strong! With Georgia Tech coming to South Bend a week from Saturday a loss in this spot will not only dash the hopes of Irish faithful all over the country but would set-up the biggest game of Brian Kelly’s career at Notre Dame because a loss to Virginia followed by a loss to the Yellow Jackets at home would more than likely be a irreversible stake into Kelly’s future unless the Irish ran the table the rest of the way and there CANNOT be a Human Being alive on the Earth that believes the Irish could pull that off!

Our guess….Notre Dame whips Virginia just as UCLA did in Week 1….BUT if the Irish flop-around and lose this game to the Cavaliers Brian Kelly might as well travel on down to Cape Kennedy and get on that rocket with Les Miles that is headed to the closest neutron star because South Bend will be a terrible place to be next week even if Kelly will have to watch along with Miles a continuous loop of the 2011 BCS Title Game between LSU and Alabama which thankfully for ALL college football games was So Damn Boring it gave us the College Football Playoff!

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Al Golden, Brian Kelly, Candy Asses, Charlie Strong, Coaches Hot Seat, Coaches Hot Seat Rankings, Darrell Hazell, David Shaw, Kevin Wilson, Kirk Ferentz, Les Miles, LSU, Miami, Mike Leach, Mike London, Mike MacIntyre, Notre Dame, Paul Rhoads, Stanford, Texas, Virginia

Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 11 – 20 Hot Seat Coaches – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

Harry September 8, 2015 0 Comments

Give these Hot Seat Coaches Hell Mr. Cash!

Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

11. Paul Petrino, Idaho – Now in his third season at Idaho head coach Paul Petrino has posted a record of…

2 – 22

…which includes an opening 2015 season loss to Ohio by a score of 45 – 28.

YES…2 – 22 will land your ass on the Hot Seat and that is exactly where Paul Petrino is at and has been for years now!

12. Ron Turner, Florida International – We are not quite sure how FIU beat UCF in Orlando on Thursday…more on George O’Leary who is now on the Hot Seat due to the loss to FIU in a bit…but a win is a win and a win over UCF moves Ron Turner down the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings BUT if Turner is going to get off the Hot Seat for good he will need more than 4 wins in 2015 and HELL if you can beat UCF in Orlando you can beat a pitiful Indiana team in Bloomington this coming Saturday….right?

RIGHT!

13. David Shaw, Stanford – Dozens of Coaches Hot Seat members were in the San Francisco Bay area and around Stanford University for work and various professional educational things in August so many of us were able to take-in and size-up the Stanford football August preseason camp and by the third week of August a consensus had been reached that we came very close to publishing in the Coaches Hot Seat Blog that we held back on because….WELL….maybe we were wrong and why send out alarms to Stanford’s first opponent Northwestern about potential problems with Stanford football so we kept our mouths shut.

After seeing in person and watching on TV the Stanford – Northwestern game this past Saturday we can now say….

WE WERE NOT WRONG!

….about the Complete Freaking Disaster that we were watching unfold in August on The Farm which has led to the…

Complete Freaking Disaster that is Stanford Football right now!

Let’s quickly summarize what several Coaches Hot Seat members saw in August with Stanford football by quoting a CHS Member on what he thought of the Cardinal’s August camp practices:

“If you held all of Stanford’s August football practices in a balsa wood house not only would the balsa wood house still be standing there would not be one dent in any of the balsa wood!”

What the Hell does the above mean exactly?

Stanford Football NO LONGER PLAYS FOOTBALL under head coach David Shaw but rather Shaw just holds pillow fights among the players so the…

Candy Ass Coaches and Candy Ass Players can act like they are football players when in FACT

….any random sorority football team from any university in the country could whip the Hell out of the….

Candy Ass Coaches and Candy Ass Players that call themselves Stanford Football!

On top of Stanford Football players being Candy Asses that are coached by Candy Asses did anyone else catch the Stanford offense against Northwestern?

Got there are Thousands of Pee Wee football teams across America that not only hit harder but are better coached and more sophisticated than the Stanford offense right now?

What a Complete Freaking Joke Stanford Football is right now and in our opinion the current state of Stanford Football goes straight to the head coach David Shaw who also in our opinion…

Wouldn’t know an honest day’s work if it hit him in the ass!

No David Shaw…sitting in your office listening to jazz music is NOT working IF you are the head coach of the Stanford football team which by the way you have turned into the…

Biggest Group of Candy Asses in the American Republic today!

Congratulations David Shaw you should be Mighty Damn Proud of Yourself because you are going to do the Next Too Damn Impossible….

Be handed a championship football program from Jim Harbaugh and less than three years later be now sitting on a record over your last 15 games of…

8 – 7

….and headed towards getting your precious jazz listening ass run right off The Farm!

Up next for the Candy Asses in Cardinal:

UCF this coming Saturday on The Farm which just lost to FIU at home!

Here’s a thought:

The Stanford football coaches and players should all get in their best Sunday dresses out and find some nice pillows from the nearby Macy’s at the Stanford Shopping Center for the UCF game and do what they best and love so very much in style…

Have a Pillow Fight!

Fear the Tree? No…not any longer on The Farm!

Fear the Pillows being swung by the Candy Ass Coaches and Players on the Stanford NOT A Football Team anymore!

14. Les Miles, LSU – Let’s give the award…

Thank God Almighty that those Idiots weren’t around during World War II

…to the LSU athletic department that could not find a way to move a game one day forward to Sunday after the McNeese State – LSU game was cancelled on Saturday which lots of…

Flunky Paper Pushers in the LSU Athletic Department

….couldn’t somehow do who no doubt would be selling apples on the local street corner if they weren’t working in athletics where morons can hang around forever whether they are actually good at their jobs or not who and couldn’t just say this simple Damn thing:

“Sorry Folks….the McNeese State – LSU game is cancelled…see everyone back here at Tiger Stadium tomorrow for a 5PM for kick-off.”

Would the above had meant that the McNeese State football team would have driven the 130 miles back to their campus in Lake Charles to spend the night and driven back to Baton Rouge on Sunday for the game?

YES….Big Freaking Deal!

Would the above have meant that LSU Athletics would have spent a few extra hundred thousand dollars in overtime for people working in and around Tiger Stadium?

YES…Big Freaking Deal!

Would the above have meant that LSU athletic administrators otherwise known as Precious Candy Ass Paper Pushers would have had to do some extra work over the weekend?

YES…Big Freaking Deal!

Bottom-Line: LSU Athletics is run by Complete Freaking Morons that cannot move a football game…..A Freaking Football Game…one day forward!

YES…it is true…there are Complete Freaking Morons in position of authority all over America right now and LSU Athletics is a prime example of that FACT!

Getting back to Les Miles the LSU Tigers now open the season at Mississippi State and if Les Miles’ football team loses that game…

Expect your ass to be the temperature in the Bayou on a HOT August Day Les Miles!

15. Kliff Kingsbury, Texas Tech – PBK’s….Pretty Boy Kingsbury…football team at Texas Tech got a 59 – 45 win over FCS team Sam Houston in Week 1 which means about as much as a grain of sand being washed into the ocean and in Week 2 the Red Raiders play UTEP at home in a game that very simply…

PBK…Pretty Boy Kingsbury….CANNOT LOSE

….with Arkansas in Week 3.

Oh…Arkansas beat UTEP in Week 1 by the score of 48 – 13 so everyone here at Coaches Hot Seat will be watching this UTEP – Texas Tech game and score very closely!

Good Luck to you PBK!

16. Steve Sarkisian, USC – USC whipped an overmatched Arkansas State team in Week 1 and the Trojans play a very weak Idaho team in Week 2 and then USC gets…

The Balsa Wood Candy Ass Pillow Fight Boys of Stanford in Week 3

….so USC should EASILY be 3 – 0 when they head to play Arizona State in Tempe on September 26.

As for Steve Sarkisian and his recent “troubles” we can only say to Steve….

Focus on Family and Football Steve and keep the Focus there….PERIOD.

17. Larry Fedora, North Carolina – North Carolina looked better…especially the UNC defense under Gene Chizik…than the Tar Heels looked in 2014 BUT the OLD Ball Coach’s South Carolina team looked AVERAGE at best so was UNC’s performance against the Gamecocks something to be impressed with or just….whatever?

In our opinion….WHATEVER….because there are probably some high schools team in the South that could whip the South Carolina team that the OLD Ball Coach ran out onto the field in Charlotte!

Coming up for Larry Fedora and North Carolina:

NC A&T
Illinois
Delaware

Hell…North Carolina SHOULD be…

3 – 1

…when go to Atlanta to play Georgia Tech on October 3!

If not…Larry Fedora knows where he will be….no NOT on the beach with is shirt off wowing the ladies and looking for someone that will take a picture of him but rather….

On the FREAKING HOT SEAT!

18. Kirk Ferentz, Iowa – It’s not just the Iowa football team that is a Complete Freaking Disaster at the University of Iowa after reading about who Iowa just hired as the new president of the school….

Rocky Start for University of Iowa President, Rekha Basu, Des Moines Register

“Less than 2 percent of the faculty thinks J. Bruce Harreld is qualified to be the University of Iowa’s next president; among the college community at large, it’s 2.6 percent. By contrast, more than 90 percent of respondents to a campus survey gave high ratings to the other three finalists.

Nonetheless, Harreld was named UI’s 21st president Thursday in a unanimous vote from the Iowa Board of Regents. In so doing, they chose a former business executive with no experience in university administration, whose resume lists as his present employer a company he has since acknowledged no longer exists.

Harreld has also admitted he’ll have a steep learning curve for the job, and that his “unusual background” will mean he’ll need a lot of teaching, coaching and mentoring from those who criticized him. It’s good he acknowledged that, and gracious to extend the olive branch. But considering he’ll earn $590,000, plus $200,000 annually in deferred compensation, on-the-job training shouldn’t be necessary.”

What in the Freaking Hell?

Of course, the Iowa regents hiring this Buffoon as the new University of Iowa president makes the school paying football coach Kirk Ferentz $4 Million Dollars a year make sense….well…NOTHING can make paying Kirk Ferentz all that money for mediocrity make sense which brings us to the…

$4 Million Dollar Man Kirk Ferentz

…who over the last five seasons while earning around $20 Million Dollars has posted records of…

Overall: 34 – 30

Big Ten: 19 – 21

…which is a good gig if you can’t be the president of the University of Iowa who it seems is NOT qualified for the job while hauling down almost $800K a year!

Anyone else starting to notice a pattern here at the University of Iowa and if so what does that pattern mean?

We don’t know the exact answer to that question but there are plenty of people here at Coaches Hot Seat that are NOT qualified for lots of jobs at the University of Iowa that make six-figures a year and if we can just get to the right person in Iowa no doubt we will be hired in a Helluva hurry…and kept around whether we FAIL at our jobs or not!

Who is dumber….the folks at LSU that can’t move a football game one day forward or the folks at Iowa that pay a football coach millions of dollars for mediocrity and just hired a president that in our opinion that doesn’t know his ass from the side of a barn when it comes to run a major state university?

It’s Iowa by an eyelash!

The N-O Man: The University of Iowa’s new president has no experience, no ideas, and flubbed his own resume, Kembrew McLeod, Slate.com

Oh, these are just Complete Freaking Idiots at the University of Iowa!

19. Mike MacIntyre, Colorado – As we said last week in the Preseason Coaches Hot Seat Ranking Analysis we were hoping for a…

Herculean Effort

…by Mike MacIntyre and the Colorado Buffs in 2015 and what in the Hell did the CU Buffs do in the first game against Hawaii?

The CU Buffs looked like Complete Freaking Buffoons at the opening of the game against the Warriors and it really looked like the head coach and coaching staff showed up at the first game on the sideline without coaching during August camp at all!

Geez….Mike MacIntyre…what in the Hell is going on in Boulder son?

Our recommendation for Colorado head coach Mike MacIntyre: Get things fixed with your football team this week against UMass because if you lose that Week 3 game to Colorado State which has a first-year head coach in Mike Bobo the rest of the 2015 football season could turn into a Complete Freaking Disaster especially with the Oregon Ducks coming to town on October 3.

If Colorado somehow lost to UMass this Saturday in Boulder Mike MacIntyre and the entire CU coaching staff should be fired before they leave the field and a local high school staff should be hired to coach the rest of the season!

Memo to Mike MacIntyre: Get Off Your Ass Son!

20. Mike Leach, Washington State – Really Mike Leach?

Lose to Portland State in the home opening game in Pullman?

Really Mike Leach?

Your Football Team looked like SHIT on Saturday Mike Leach and since we know you can coach we can only draw ONE conclusion after that pitiful loss to Portland State:

Mike Leach just no longer gives a SHIT because his Washington State football team now plays like SHIT!

In Mike Leach’s last 15 football games at Washington State the Cougars are…

3 – 12

…and those 3 wins last season were over….

Portland State
Utah
Oregon State

Oh…Portland State and Oregon State had losing records last year so in the last 15 games Mike Leach has beaten…

1 Team with a winning record

…and anyone that recalls the Washington State – Utah game from last season knows it took a miracle for the Cougars to win that game!

What is going on at Washington State exactly with Mike Leach?

Well…it’s just our opinion…but Mike Leach was always a terrible fit for Pullman, Washington because look at where Mike Leach was living when he could live anywhere he wanted to live…

Key West, Florida

Still…Mike Leach won a lot of football games at Texas Tech in Lubbock, Texas which isn’t Key West, Florida either so there really is no excuse for Mike Leach to be losing to Portland State in the first game of this third season at Washington State so then just what in the Hell is going on in Pullman?

We think we know BUT we are going to hold our tongue and watch and see IF…

Mike Leach and Washington State just flat out QUIT in 2015 after the opening season loss OR if they come back strong this week in a very tough game at Rutgers.

Your choice Mike Leach and Washington State BUT if Mike Leach does fail at Washington State he will be remembered as…

The Football Coach that got run out of Lubbock

AND

The Football Coach that QUIT in Pullman

Great thing is Mike Leach will be able to determine how this story ends and if it ends badly whether we like Mike Leach or not if the current trend continues in Pullman we will light Mike Leach’s ass up!

Is everyone reading the Coaches Hot Seat Blog starting to understand that we are TOUGHEST on the people we expect the most from?

That’s way ALL alumni and fans should be….don’t accept anything less than…

EXCELLENCE

…and you have a Helluva lot better chance of actually getting…

EXCELLENCE!

21 – 30 Post Week Hot Seat Coaches Analysis Coming Soon!

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Candy Asses, Coaches Hot Seat, Coaches Hot Seat Rankings, Colorado, David Shaw, Florida International, Idaho, Iowa, Kirk Ferentz, Kliff Kingsbury, Les Miles, LSU, Mike Leach, Mike MacIntyre, Paul Petrino, Pillow Fight, Ron Turner, Stanford, Steve Sarkisian, Texas Tech, USC, Washington State