Tag Archive: SEC

Post Week 8 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

 

Post Week 8 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

Thanks Mr. Cash!

1.  Butch Jones, Tennessee – The overall record for Butch Jones at Tennessee is bad enough…

33 – 25

….in his FIFTH year on the job but it’s Jones record in SEC Conference play that is the reason he’s headed for the chopping block…

14 – 22

…with these games still left to be played in 2017:

At Kentucky
Southern Miss
At Missouri
LSU
Vanderbilt

Yep…even if Butch Jones and his Vols won their last 4 SEC Conference games his record in SEC play would still just be…

18 – 22

….and there’s No Chance In Hell that fans of Tennessee Football should tolerate Butch Jones’ SEC record and thus that’s why the Vols will have a new head football coach come 2018!

Our guess…Tennessee finishes with a 4 – 8 record in 2017 and a Total Damn Mess on its hands as the folks in Knoxville try to figure out where to go next….here’s a tip for Tennessee AD John Currie when considering who to hire as the next head football coach at Tennessee:

Imagine in your mind’s eye Nick Saban’s reaction to hearing the name of the person who Tennessee hired to be its next head football coach. Is Nick smiling, does he have no reaction, does he grunt and think that maybe the Vols will be a tough win now. Don’t hire the coach that makes Nick Saban smile Currie!

2.  Bret Bielema, Arkansas – With the loss to Auburn on Saturday Bret Bielema’s record in SEC play in his FIFTH year on the job is now at…

10 – 26

….which is a winning percentage of…

.278

…and the previous two head coaches at Arkansas Houston Nutt and Bobby Petrino posted a combined winning percentage in SEC Conference play of…

.527

Considering the above there is a very good argument that could be made that Bret Bielema is the…

WORST HIRE

…in the SEC Conference since the end of World War II which would mean Arkansas AD Jeff Long has hired as the head coach of the Razorbacks:

Bobby Petrino – Wouldn’t hire to wash our cars!
John L. Smith – Only an insane person would hire John L. Smith!
Bret Bielema – The WORST hire in SEC since end of World War II!

Now at 2 – 5 on the season Arkansas still has to play this season games against…

At Ole Miss
Coastal Carolina
At LSU
Mississippi State
Missouri

…and there is a very real chance that the Hogs finish with just THREE wins in Bret Bielema’s FIFTH year on the job in Fayetteville!

Got fire the whole Damn Arkansas athletic department?

You do if you don’t want Arkansas Football Totally Destroyed!

3.  David Beaty, Kansas – It was just Stupid at Kansas but after the Jayhawks 43 – 0 loss to TCU the week after losing to Iowa State 45 – 0 it’s just…

Who gives a Damn about Kansas Football?

…and the answer to that question would be…NO ONE AT ALL!

David Beaty is in his THIRD season at Kansas and his records are…

Overall:  3 – 28

Big 12:  1 – 21

…and if Beaty isn’t fired before December 1 then why in the Hell is Kansas even bothering to play football?

Same goes for Kansas AD Sheahon Zenger who hired Charlie Weis and David Beaty and if Zenger worked in the Real World and not on a college campus his ass would have been…

Fired Long Ago!

4.  Mike Riley, Nebraska – Mike Riley had a good week in the bye week because the Huskers didn’t get their ass whipped and now the 3 – 4 Huskers travel to play a decent Purdue team that somehow just lost to Rutgers and if Nebraska loses this game it will be because the Husker players have…

Flat-Out Quit

….but there are many here at Coaches Hot Seat that believe a lot of Husker football players Flat-Out Quit against Ohio State!

3 – 4 Nebraska has left in 2017….

At Purdue
Northwestern
At Minnesota
At Penn State
Iowa

….which looks to us like a losing season for the Huskers but Mike Riley had 5 losing seasons in 14 seasons coaching at Oregon State…including the season before he was hired at Nebraska…which makes one wonder…

Why in the Hell was Mike Riley hired at Nebraska?

Because former Nebraska Athletic Director Shawn Eichorst doesn’t know his ass from the side of a barn…that’s why!

5.  Lovie Smith, Illinois – With the Illini’s loss to Minnesota on Saturday Lovie Smith’s records at Illinois now stand at…

Overall:  5 – 14

Big Ten:  2 – 11

…and those 5 wins were over:

Murray State
Rutgers
Michigan State
Ball State
Western Kentucky

Please….can someone….anyone…tell us why Lovie Smith is the head football coach at Illinois?

Didn’t think so!

6.  Jim Harbaugh, Michigan – A few Coaches Hot Seat members were there on the day that Jim Harbaugh was introduced as the new head football coach at Stanford in December 2006 and we were there when Stanford beat USC in Jimmy’s first season in early October 2006 at the LA Coliseum and we were there for ALL of Jimmy’s FOUR seasons on The Farm and thus we believe we know Jimmy Harbaugh very well!

With the above in mind it’s obvious to us that something is…

Terribly Wrong at Michigan

….and it goes beyond Jimmy’s record in his last 11 games which is by the way…

6 – 5

…and we are not going to pretend we know what is going but there’s something….

Terribly Wrong at Michigan

…in our humble opinion of course!

Most surprising of all to us here at Coaches Hot Seat who watched Jim Harbaugh recruit Andrew Luck and several other solid quarterbacks to Stanford when the 2017 season kicked-off Michigan didn’t have a FBS-level QB on its roster which begs the question?

What the Hell is going on Jimmy?

Well let’s see here….watching replays of Michigan’s games against Michigan State and Penn State we have come to the following conclusions about the Wolverines offense = Jim Harbaugh’s offense:

1.  Michigan doesn’t have a FBS-level QB on its roster. Hell, Michigan doesn’t have a college-level QB on its roster. Hell, Michigan doesn’t have a high school level QB on its roster! Yes…that’s a Helluva problem Jimmy!

2.  The Michigan Offensive line could be easily whipped in a fist fight by 3…maybe even 2…members of Coaches Hot Seat and as a group there is not a bigger group of Candy Asses in America…save the Candy Ass Tech Boys in Silicon Valley…than the Michigan Offensive Line. Yes…that’s a Helluva problem Jimmy!

3.  The Michigan Running Backs and Wide Receivers are hardly coached at all and if they are coached the coaches that are coaching them should be fired…like this afternoon! SOFT and LAZY are the words that come to mind when we think of the Michigan Running Backs and Wide Receivers and…Yes, that’s a Helluva problem Jimmy!

4.  The Michigan offensive play-calling in one word is…SHIT! Make that TOTAL SHIT..and Yes, that’s a Helluva problem Jimmy!

Besides all of the above you have a pretty decent offense at Michigan this season Jimmy!

Michigan is now 5 – 2 in 2017 and still has the below games left on their schedule:

Rutgers
Minnesota
At Maryland
At Wisconsin
Ohio State

Hell….Michigan might only win 2…maybe 3…more games in 2017 which is Jim Harbaugh’s THIRD year on the job and we only have the following to say to Jimmy Harbaugh:

Get your Damn ass together Son or your head coaching career is going to be over in a flash!

7.  Kalani Sitake, BYU – The calls from our Mormon friends in Utah started about four weeks ago after Utah State beat BYU by the score of…

40 – 24

…and if you have Mormon friends then you know….

These folks don’t complain about ANYTHING

…and yet their calls keep coming and they are saying things like….

“You just cannot believe what is going on behind the scenes of BYU football.”

“BYU football is just the biggest mess you can possible imagine.”

“I am shocked about what I am being told is going on in Provo.”

At first we didn’t know what to think but after BYU lost to East Carolina..one of the worst teams in FBS football…on Saturday by the score of…

33 – 17

…we are now convinced after doing some checking of our own that BYU Football is in a Meltdown for the Ages in the history of college football in America and that the Cougars might not win another game this season even with some very weak teams left on their schedule:

San Jose State
At Fresno State
At UNLV
UMass
At Hawaii

Because the information we have gathered is second-hand we are not going to write our opinion on what is going on with BYU Football but we will say this…if the current trend continues….BYU may very well have a new head football coach come December and the Kalani Sitake era at BYU will be over before it really even got started.

8.  Kliff Kingsbury, Texas Tech – If there was one thing that Kliff Kingsbury could not have let happened in Year FIVE as the head coach at Texas Tech was let Iowa State come into Lubbock and whip his Red Raiders on Homecoming weekend which leaves Kingsbury’s records now at…

Overall:  28 – 29

Big 12:  14 – 26

…and Texas Tech now at 4 – 3 on the season still having to play these teams:

At Oklahoma
Kansas State
Baylor
TCU
At Texas

Damn….it’s going to be mighty hard for Texas Tech to get to 6 wins on the season and less than 6 wins in 2017 and Kingsbury will have posted…

3 Losing Seasons in 5 Years on the Job

….which even at Texas Tech will get your ass fired…right?

Right!

Since it seems obvious that now member of TCU coaching staff Sonny Dykes would be a natural fit as the head coach at Texas Tech we would recommend that Kingsbury find a way to get to at least SEVEN wins in 2017 or more than likely the folks in Lubbock will be hiring them a new head football coach December.

9.  Larry Fedora, North Carolina – After North Carolina’s 59 – 7 loss to Virginia Tech on Saturday one has to wonder if the Tar Heels have totally quit on head coach Larry Fedora or maybe this is just God’s way of getting justice against the North Carolina Athletic Department which somehow was able to get away with…

Totally Not Monitoring the Academic Activities of its Athletes

…for decades but whatever the reason for the current slide of UNC Football there is one thing we know for sure….

North Carolina is getting its ass-whipped on a regular basis in 2017 and either Larry Fedora will fix this mess in Chapel Hill or his ass should and will get run right out of town!

North Carolina is now 1 – 7 on the season and has left to play…

Miami
At Pitt
Western Carolina
At NC State

Got 2 – 10 Larry?

You are about to have it Son!

10.  Jim McElwain, Florida – It seems that Jim McElwain’s luck is finally running out which began long before he got the head coaching job at Florida and actually began when Nick Saban plucked Jimmy from Fresno State to be the offensive coordinator at Alabama where…

Any Damn Moron can get the Alabama offense to score 30+ points a game

…which then led to Jimmy getting the Colorado State job where he did some decent work and then the Florida job where Jimmy was fortunate enough to arrive in Gainesville when the SEC East was the weakest it has been since the SEC went to two divisions BUT Oh those days are over and on Saturday the 3 – 3 Gators get to play a Georgia Football team that is actually a…

Georgia Football Team

…and by late Saturday night the Gators will no doubt be 3 – 4 with these games still left on the schedule:

At Missouri
At South Carolina
UBA
Florida State

Hell…Florida will be lucky to win 6 games in 2017 and thus it looks like Jim McElwain will be on the Hot Seat for the foreseeable future.

Oh and here’s something else Jimmy..not only could Any Damn Moron get the Alabama offense to score 30+ points a game…

Any Damn Moron can win 8 games a year at Florida!

Personally we like Jim McElwain and ran into him a couple of times when he was with the Oakland Raiders in 2006 and in the Flathead Valley of Montana where we are almost every Summer for a fishing trip BUT Jimmy if you are presented with a good head coaching job offer at another Power 5 school in the coming weeks…you might want to consider it Jimmy because things are about to get really HOT in Gainesville not withstanding whatever Yahoos have been sending you and your players death threats which should be turned over to the police immediately!

Coach ‘Em Up Jimmy!

Post Week 7 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash! – The Best Land Under Heaven: The Donner Party in the Age of Manifest Destiny

 

Before we get to the Post Week 7 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings the members of Coaches Hot Seat have been reading a GREAT book the last few weeks which will give anyone a great perspective on life and one’s relative lack of luck in their lives on this Earth. The book is…

The Best Land Under Heaven: The Donner Party in the Age of Manifest Destiny, Michael Wallis, Amazon.com

…and not only does the above book provide an amazing history of the trials and tribulations of the Donner Party’s trip from the Midwest to California in 1846, it weaves into the story many important parts of American history that will change how you view our Great Country. As the great Civil War author and historian Shelby Foote has rightly said…

“One cannot understand America without understanding the US Civil War.”

…one cannot also really understand America without knowing about the massive movement of Americans to the West in the middle of the 19 th Century before and after gold was found in California in 1849.

The main lesson though we got from the book The Best Land Under Heaven is that no matter how bad things are in our lives they could be a Helluva lot worse which brings some great perspective to our daily lives and with that in mind let’s get to the latest ranking of multi-millionaire college head coaches on the Hot Seat who haven’t a care in the world beyond their asses now being lit-up!

Post Week 7 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

Thank Johnny!

1.  Butch Jones, Tennessee – If Butch Jones hadn’t committed so many verbal and personal gaffes at Tennessee the last five seasons he might have a fighting chance to survive to coach the Vols in 2018 with plenty of winnable games left on the schedule but after back-to-back home losses to Georgia and South Carolina it’s all but over for one of the most disliked men in Tennessee football history.

There’s an art + science to a college head football coach winning over both his football team and fan base and Butch Jones has amazingly alienated both to varying degrees at Tennessee and thus Butch has all but given up an important thing for coaches….”the benefit of the doubt”…when things get tough and with Alabama on deck for the 3 – 3 Vols Jones has now worked himself into a position where he better Damn have Chubby Boy in Memphis looking for an exit door to another head coaching job IF Jones wants to coach next season.

Here’s what Tennessee has left in 2017:

At Alabama
At Kentucky
Southern Miss
At Missouri
LSU
Vanderbilt

Our guess the Vols win 6 or 7 games at best in 2017 and there’s not a chance in Hell Butch Jones will survive that in Year 5 in Knoxville so the attention now turns to who will be the next head football coach at Tennessee which will be one of the most interesting hires in the upcoming weeks.

2.  Bret Bielema, Arkansas – If there is one thing we really distrust at Coaches Hot Seat it is anything categorized as a “slam-dunk” and Bret Bielema was described as such when hired at Arkansas in 2013 and yet here we are FIVE years later and Bielema now has on the board:

Overall:  27 – 30

SEC:  10 – 25

Nope….Bret Bielema was NOT a “slam-dunk” hire at Arkansas and in reality Bielema has made a Helluva lot of bad decisions in Fayetteville primarily around assistant coaches he has hired + failed to keep which is richly ironic since one of the reasons some claimed Bielema took the Arkansas job was that he couldn’t get more money for his assistants at Wisconsin! Bret Bielema has had ALL the Damn Money and Resources he has needed or possibly wanted at Arkansas and yet his record in SEC play is…

10 – 25

….so please don’t tell us Bielema hasn’t had every Damn chance to win games in Fayetteville because the reality is he has had EVERYTHING and he has FAILED miserably!

What is really scary at Arkansas is that there are otherwise smart people like Arky AD Jeff Long who don’t have the ability to admit they were “wrong” or even to make it clear that expectations at Arkansas are a Helluva lot higher than what Bielema has been not achieving with the Hogs and what a great lesson this is for everyone who should learn from this situation that…

When Wrong…Admit You Are Wrong…Learn From Your Mistakes…and Move the Hell On To Fixing the Damn Problem!

Instead Arkansas AD Jeff Long is in deep denial about Bret Bielema but then why wouldn’t Long be in denial since after all he has hired as head football coaches at Arky that in the end turned out to be…

Bobby Petrino – Total Damn Disaster
John L. Smith – Total Damn Disaster
Bret Bielema – Total Damn Disaster

Some may argue that Bobby Petrino won a Helluva lot of games at Arkansas, but there is not a chance in Hell we would have hired Petrino then or today to wash our cars because we have standards somewhere way the Hell north of Jeff Long and the University of Arkansas and when you set your standards low no one should be surprised that your ass ends up looking like a fool when a motorcycle accident happens!

After the loss to Alabama the 2 – 4 Hogs now have left on the schedule…

Auburn
At Ole Miss
Coastal Carolina
At LSU
Mississippi State
Missouri

…and does anyone with a working brain think Arkansas can win 4 of their last 6 games to get to even a .500 record in Bielema’s FIFTH year on the job?

Nope and that is why fans of Arkansas Football have one choice and one choice only…

Fire AD Jeff Long AND Head Coach Bret Bielema

…or let your football program be totally destroyed!

It’s YOUR choice fans of Arkansas Football!

3.  David Beaty, Kansas – Things are getting Very Damn Stupid at the University of Kansas and we write that because KU AD Sheahon Zenger has hired two head football coaches….Charlie Weis and David Beaty….and their combined records the last SIX seasons stands at:

Overall:  9 – 49

Big 12:  2 – 38

Geez….can someone explain to us how Kansas AD Sheahon Zenger is still employed in Lawrence?

Oh…current Kansas head coach David Beaty’s records are now…

Overall:  3 – 27

Big 12:  1 – 20

..and the 1 – 5 Jayhawks still have to play in 2017….

At TCU
Kansas State
Baylor
At Texas
Oklahoma
Oklahoma State

…which looks to us like a 1 – 11 record in Beaty’s THIRD season on the job.

Can ANY head football coach and the AD that hired him survive the above records?

Not in the Real World but is the University of Kansas part of the Real World?

Not really it seems!

4.  Mike Riley, Nebraska – The Cold Hard Reality of Mike Riley’s tenure at Nebraska are his records which after the Total Debacle home loss to Ohio State now stand at…

Overall:  18 – 15

Big Ten:  11 – 10

….which would get ANY coach fired in Lincoln and now there really is nothing that can save Riley’s job barring the Yellowstone Supervolcano erupting and ending all life on Earth!

With the above reality in mind it will be interesting to see who new Nebraska AD Bill Moos hires to replace Mike Riley between now and early December and we would be stunned if Moos tried to bring Washington State head coach Mike Leach to Lincoln since our friends in the Great State of Nebraska that we checked with aren’t really into a…

Head Coach blaming his players when HIS team gets its ass whipped as Washington State got whipped by California on Friday night!

…but then who the Hell wants a coach that gives blame when HIS team loses and takes credit when THEY win? As Paul “Bear” Bryant rightly said and which no doubt the Great Tom Osborne would agree with…

“If anything goes bad, I did it. If anything goes semi-good, we did it. If anything goes really good, then you did it. That’s all it takes to get people to win football games for you.”

….which Mike Leach has turned on its head by essentially saying to his players:

When things go right I get the credit and when thing go wrong YOU get the blame!

Who in the Hell would want his Son playing for a coach that believes that kind of Total and Non-American Excuse Making Bullshit and where exactly was Mike Leach raised because Real Americans don’t raise Total Asses that care little about anything but their own Precious Ass?

Pitiful Mike Leach…just So Damn Pitiful and if you lost a couple more games it will be a Damn Pleasure to roast your Sorry and Pitiful Ass Mike!

The obvious choice of the next head coach at Nebraska is of course UCF HC Scott Frost but Frost might have several attractive offers to choose from in the coming weeks and if Frost does decide to go elsewhere Moos will have a career defining job to do that will determine the future fate of Nebraska Football so no pressure at all Bill and Good Luck to you in the new job as well!

5.  Barry Odom, Missouri – After the loss to Georgia on Saturday Mizzou head coach Barry’s Odom’s records now stand at…

Overall:  5 – 13

SEC:  2 – 10

….and the 1 – 5 Tigers still have to play in 2017:

Idaho
At UConn
Florida
Tennessee
At Vanderbilt
At Arkansas

…and our guess is that Mizzou wins 3….maybe 4 games…this season and that would be 4 wins or less TWO straight seasons and nothing short of a…

Total and Complete Disaster for Mizzou Football!

6.  Jim Mora, UCLA – For some reason between the 2015 and 2016 football seasons they quit teaching the UCLA Bruins football players how to tackle in Westwood and “Surprise – Surprise”…NOT…. in the last two seasons the Bruins under Jim Mora have posted records of…

Overall:  7 – 11

Pac-12:  3 – 8

….and now at 3 – 3 after the loss to Arizona what is still left on the schedule in 2017 is…

Oregon
At Washington
At Utah
Arizona State
At USC
California

….which looks like SIX wins at best for Mora & Company and is that acceptable to the folks at UCLA in Mora’s SIXTH year on the job?

It might just be!

7.  Todd Graham, Arizona State – Congratulations to Todd Graham and his Arizona State football team on beating the Mighty Washington Huskies which for some reason looked unprepared and borderline un-coached in Tempe on Saturday night….What’s Up With That Pete?….and with that win over the Huskies the 3 – 3 Sun Devils have to keep things rolling because head coach Graham needs 7+ wins to hang onto this job and here is what ASU still has in front of them this season:

At Utah
USC
Colorado
At UCLA
At Oregon State
Arizona

One of the toughest things for a college head football coach is to get his team down from the HIGH of a beating a top-ranked team and Todd Graham has his work cut-out for him in getting the Sun Devils re-focused to play a very tough Utah team in Salt Lake City on Saturday because a loss to the Utes on Saturday and Graham will be moving right back up the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings again!

8.  Gus Malzahn, Auburn – In a season where Auburn head coach Gus Malzahn needs no more than 4 losses AND a win over either Georgia or Alabama to save his job losing two games to Clemson and LSU with Georgia and Alabama still left on the schedule is definitely Not A Good Thing and the calculus for Malzahn is that he has NO margin for error between now and the first of December with the 5 – 2 Tigers still having to play games against…

At Arkansas
At Texas A&M
Georgia
La. Monroe
Alabama

Bottom-Line:

If Gus Malzahn loses to Georgia and Alabama to finish at 8 – 4 he’s DONE at Auburn

If Gus Malzahn loses another game but beats either Georgia and Alabama to finish at 8 – 4 he HAS A CHANCE at Auburn

Yep…this is about Gus Malzahn winning at least one of the two games against Georgia and Alabama and we would recommend that Malzahn and his Tigers not lose either of the next two games before Georgia comes to The Plains on November 11 because that would put Gus into a borderline impossible spot so…

Coach Hard Gus because your job in on the line EVERY week Son!

9.  Lovie Smith, Illinois – Can someone…anyone…explain to us why Lovie Smith is the head football coach at Illinois?

No one can explain to us why Lovie Smith is the head coach at Illinois?

Didn’t think so and now after nothing short of a Total Disaster of a loss to Rutgers at home which came into the game with 16 straight Big Ten Conference losses Lovie Smith’s records with the Illini now stand at…

Overall:  5 – 13

Big Ten:  2 – 10

…and they still have to play this season:

At Minnesota
Wisconsin
At Purdue
Indiana
At Ohio State
Northwestern

Hell…will Illinois win another game in 2017?

Hell..even if they do win 1 or 2 of their last 6 games to finish at 3 – 9 or 4 – 8 how could Lovie Smith stay employed at Illinois?

The reality is that there are some coaches that are Pro Coaches and there are some coaches that are College Coaches and then there are a TINY amount of coaches that can coach both Pro and College players and if there is one thing that coaches that have successfully coached in both the Pro and College games…think Jimmy Johnson and Pete Carroll…it is they have…

PASSION

…for the Great Game of Football and thus can motivate 18 – 22 year old kids and Lovie Smith seems to us to be…

Barely Awake Even During the Games

….so Please…how in the Hell can Lovie Smith ever win a Damn thing at Illinois?

Eventually Lovie Smith will be fired at Illinois because there’s not a chance in Hell he will ever make the Illini competitive in the Uber-competitive Big Ten Conference and when the firing of a coach is inevitable it’s ALWAYS best to get on with the firing which is something the AD at Illinois will either understand now or learn eventually in the next year or so!

10.  Steve Addazio, Boston College – Steve Addazio’s BC team beat Louisville on Saturday which was nice win BUT beating this year’s Louisville team is not going to be that big of a deal come the end of the season because Louisville couldn’t stop the prison team from the original The Longest Yard movie and with that win Addazio’s Eagles improved to 3 – 4 in 2017 with these games still left to be played…

At Virginia
Florida State
NC State
UConn
At Syracuse

Unlike Louisville most of the above teams actually play DEFENSE and thus we fully expect BC to finish with a losing record in 2017 and for Steve Addazio to lose his job come late November – early December because with these records on the board…

Overall:  27 – 31

ACC:  12 – 24

…how could Addazio possibly keep his job with another losing season this year?

The 11th College Football Season of Coaches Hot Seat Kicks-Off! – 2017 Post Week One Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – Give These Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

 

Coaches Hot Seat was first dreamed up in October 2006 as a way to help force out then Stanford head football coach Walt Harris among a group of close friends who were having drinks at the Balboa Café in the Marina District of San Francisco, and here we are in September 2017 with Coaches Hot Seat now entering its 11 th college football season…a second decade now begins…with that same group of close friends tossing out their opinions from the peanut gallery about the relative status of college football head coaches job status vis-à-vis the warmth of their asses!

Coaches Hot Seat has been great fun from the start and has grown from a few close friends to over 170 members of Coaches Hot Seat now that mainly are members it seems to attend the annual Coaches Hot Seat Summer Clambake at Lake Tahoe each August where we have one Helluva great time talking football and the upcoming college football season and CHS members also help to shape the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings each week.

With that in mind let’s get to the business at hand which is the….

2017 Post Week One Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

…which means let’s bring out the Great Johnny Cash to give the coaches on the Hot Seat a wake-up call!

Thank You Mr. Cash and away we go on the 11 th season of Coaches Hot Seat

1.  Kevin Sumlin, Texas A&M – If you thought watching the Total Meltdown of Kevin Sumlin and the Texas A&M coaching staff in the Rose Bowl on Sunday night was nothing short of a Total Disaster then watching a replay of the game only makes things worse because one could take a look at each play and see mistake….after mistake….after mistake…after mistake by Sumlin and the Aggies Coaches that flat-out….

Robbed the A&M players of what should have been a win over UCLA!

It’s easy to look at the second-half of the A&M – UCLA game and point to many Beyond Stupid mistakes made by Kevin Sumlin and the A&M coaching staff, but the Idiocy actually began in the first quarter with the Aggies up 7 – 3 and the Bruins fumbling the ball and an A&M player returning it to the 3 yard line which was followed by A&M OC Noel Mazzone calling the following plays:

Fade to Left-Side of the End Zone
Fade to Right-Side of the End Zone
2 Yard Run to 1 Yard Line

Followed by a field goal putting the Aggies up 10 – 3 over UCLA.

Why didn’t Aggies OC Noel Mazzone just run the Damn ball right down the Bruins throat from the 3 yard line you ask when A&M was gashing the Bruins for over 7 yards a carry in the game?

Damn Good Question but this is just the beginning of the Damn Idiocy that was capped off in the second-half by what we hear at Coaches Hot Seat believe to be…

A Series of the Stupidest Coaching Decisions in the History of College Football in America

…which at Texas A&M dates back to 1894!

By now everyone that follows college football closely must know that Texas A&M went up by the score of….

Aggies – 44
Bruins – 10

…after a field goal with 4:08 left in the 3 rd quarter of the game. At this point there should have been NO CHANCE IN HELL of UCLA winning this football game unless Kevin Sumlin and the A&M coaches committed a series of blunders that would make the Stupidest Human Beings on the Earth look like Mensa members and guess what….that is exactly what happened!

Following the Aggies field goal to pt them up 44 – 10 over UCLA the Bruins then scored in 2 minutes to make the score 44 – 17 with 2:06 left in the 3 rd Quarter and this is what Kevin Sumlin and his offensive coaches did the rest of the game leading to one of the great meltdowns in college football history:

Aggies Remaining Offensive Plays in the Game after up 44 – 17:

1. Run for no gain
2. Run for 6 yards
3. Incomplete Pass
4. Punt

UCLA Touchdown and score is A&M 44 – UCLA 24

5. Run for 1 yard
6. Incomplete Pas
7. Run for 14 yards
8. Run for 3 yards
9. Run for 8 yards
10. Complete Pass
11. Sack loss of 10 yards
12. Run for 1 yard
13. Punt

UCLA Touchdown and score is A&M 44 – UCLA 31

14. Pass Complete
15. Run for 6 yards
16. Incomplete Pass
17. Run for 12 yards
18. Run for 7 yards
19. Run for loss 1 yard

With ball on 16 yard line and a made field goal making the score 47 – 31 or a two TD and two 2-point conversion game Aggies OC Noel Mazzone calls a pass play and….

20. Sack for loss of 9 yards

…which leads to a 43 yard field goal miss by the Aggies kicker instead of what should have been at most a 32 yard field goal if not shorter if Noel Mazzone had just RUN THE DAMN BALL on third down!

UCLA Touchdown and score is A&M 44 – UCLA 38

21. Run for 2 yards
22. Incomplete Pass
23. Sack for loss of 5 yards
24. Punt

UCLA Touchdown and score is A&M 44 – UCLA 45

The four plays in the last A&M series when the Aggies failed to get a first down are not that important because it was desperation time, but look the other plays above and see the Total Damn Idiocy especially when one realizes that at halftime A&M was averaging over….

6 Yards-Plus Per Run

….and in the second-half when the Aggies could have Stuff the Ball down the Bruins throats with their run game they not only called way Damn too many pass plays they also at the most critical time of the game when a made field goal would have at worst gotten the Aggies into overtime against UCLA a pass play was called with a true freshman QB on the field who not surprisingly took a big loss on a sack which led to a critical missed field goal and in our opinion….

This was level of Stupid Coaching that has not been seen in FBS Football since Charlie Weis was the head coach at Notre Dame!

In our opinion here at Coaches Hot Seat Kevin Sumlin did nothing less than GUT his own players by allowing his coaches to make one Stupid Damn Decision after another and for that he should have already been fired and the Aggies could have hired ANY high school coach on ANY level from ANYWHERE in the State of Texas and be the Aggies players would be getting better coaching today!

Let’s look at Kevin Sumlin’s records in six seasons at Texas A&M:

Overall: 44 – 22

SEC: 21 – 19

Against FBS Teams: 26 – 22

Against Group of 6 Teams: 12 – 0

Against FCS Teams: 6 – 0

Yep…take away the 18 Cupcakes that Keivn Sumlin has played and beat at A&M and we are talking about winning percentages of…

SEC: .525

Against FBS Teams: .542

…and for the above Very Average Records Kevin Sumlin has already been paid north of….

$25 Million Dollars

….and Texas A&M still owes Sumlin over $11 Million Dollars if they fired him today!

$35+ Million Dollars for a .542 record against FBS teams and .525 record in SEC play?

What kind of Damn Idiots are running Texas A&M University exactly?

Let’s not forget something else in this spot….

Last November at Kyle Field in College Station A&M led Ole Miss by 15 points entering the 4 th quarter before losing 29 – 28 and more to the point in Texas A&M last SIX games against FBS teams Kevin Sumlin’s record is…

0 – 6!

That’s right…Texas A&M has not beaten an FBS team since last October 8 when the Aggies beat Tennessee in double-overtime in College Station!

Luckily for Kevin Sumlin he is working at place….

Texas A&M University

…that embraces and celebrates AVERAGE and thus he can get away with winning percentages like…

.542 and .525

….and A&M has Nicholls and La. Lafayette to play at home in their next two games before playing Arkansas in Dallas on September 23 but then from Arkansas on it’s….

Arkansas (Dallas)
South Carolina
Alabama
At Florida
Mississippi State
Auburn
New Mexico
At Ole Miss
At LSU

…which to us looks like 7 or 8 wins for the Aggies in 2017 and based upon what the folks running Texas A&M have been willing to accept in the past maybe they will continue to accept…

Average

…now tied to the Complete Damn Stupidity of the UCLA game and the beat in College Station will go on for another year!

Be Proud Aggies…YOU are Average As Hell!

2.  Todd Graham, Arizona State – In the last two seasons at Arizona State Todd Graham has posted combined records of…

Overall: 11 – 14

Pac-12: 6 – 12

….and it seems clear from the noise coming out of Tempe that it’s going to probably take 8 wins plus in 2017 for Graham to be coaching the Sun Devils in 2018 and it wasn’t exactly a rousing start to this season in beating a very weak New Mexico State team 37 – 31, and if ASU plays like that the rest of the year there’s not a chance in Hell that Graham will be the head coach come December. Now at 1 – 0 on the year here is what ASU has left to play:

San Diego State
At Texas Tech
Oregon
At Stanford
Washington
At Utah
USC
Colorado
At UCLA
At Oregon State
Arizona

Can Todd Graham find 7 wins+ out of the Sun Devils remaining 11 games?

We don’t see it which means a very good job in Arizona State could be opening up come late November.

3.  Tony Sanchez, UNLV – The first time that anyone at Coaches Hot Seat ran into Tony Sanchez he was the head football coach at California High School in San Ramon, California which is in the East Bay of San Francisco and where Tony coached for five years before taking over and having a very successful run at Bishop Gorman High School in Las Vegas which led to him getting the UNLV job in 2015 which has led to the following records at UNLV after the disastrous opening season loss to the Howard University football team on Saturday night:

Overall: 7 – 18

MWC: 5 – 11

Those are not so great records for Tony Sanchez and the Rebels have left play this season….

At Idaho
At Ohio State
San Jose State
San Diego State
At Air Force
Utah State
At Fresno State
Hawaii
BYU
At New Mexico
At Nevada

…and it’s just a guess on our part with a new AD at UNLV on the job in Desiree Reed-Francois on the job who came over from Virginia Tech Sanchez is going to need 6-plus wins in 2017 to be the head coach of the Rebels in 2018, and if Sanchez can find 6 wins out of the above 11 remaining games he should return as the head coach at UNLV and get an extension on his contract as well!

4.  Mark Whipple, UMass – Since returning to coach at UMass in 2014 after an earlier stint coaching the Minutemen on the FCS level between 1998 – 2003 Mark Whipple has posted a record of…

Overall: 8 – 30

…over the last four seasons and an 0 – 2 start to 2017 with losses to Hawaii and Coastal Carolina doesn’t exactly give us confidence that Whipple will be the head coach at UMass when Santa shows up in late December!

What’s left for UMass this season:

Old Dominion – Loss
At Temple – Loss
At Tennessee – Loss
Ohio – Loss
At USF – Loss
Georgia Southern – Maybe Win
Appalachian State – Loss
At Mississippi State – Loss
Maine – Maybe Win
At BYU – Loss

That’s a 2 – 10 record at best in our minds for UMass in 2017 and more than likely a new head football coach for the Minutemen in 2018….in our humble opinion.

5.  Lance Leipold, Buffalo – Buffalo looked decent against Minnesota in the opening game of the season BUT in his third year on the job coaching the Bulls head coach Lance Leipold now has records of…

Overall: 7 – 18

MAC: 4 – 12

….on the board and we rather doubt that Leipold will be able to survive another losing season….but then this is Buffalo we are talking about and maybe Leipold can survive another sub .500 record and return to coach the Bulls again in 2018 which would be fine with us here at Coaches Hot Seat since we don’t have a dog in this fight or in any fight for that matter when it comes to Buffalo!

6.  Tom Herman, Texas – Earlier this year a couple of Coaches Hot Seat members were down in Austin for business plus fishing with our Texas-alum buddies and over a BBQ dinner we asked how the Tom Herman-era was going and one of those UT-alums said….

“You mean the Cult of Tom Herman?”

Coaches Hot Seat: “The Cult of Tom Herman? What the Hell does that mean?”

UT Alum: “It means that everything within the Texas Athletic Department is set-up to promote Tom Herman in the public instead of the Texas Football Team.”

Coaches Hot Seat: “That’s a change from the past?”

UT Alum: “You kidding? Mack Brown and Charlie Strong put the focus on the players….Tom Herman seems interested in only one thing…Tom Herman’s Precious Ass!”

Coaches Hot Seat: “Now that’s Damn interesting.”

UT Alum: “It is and there’s no explaining it even in Texas which is full of people with big egos….but I cannot recall running into or seeing anyone operate with a bigger ego than Tom Herman who seems to believe he invented the Sun, the Moon, and the Stars!”

Coaches Hot Seat: “It will be interesting to see how that will play out during the season.”

UT Alum: “Well right now with everything focused on kissing Tom Herman’s ass I fully expect Texas to lose the opening game to Maryland!”

Memo to Tom Herman:  Get Over Yourself Son or your head coaching tenure at Texas or anywhere else will be over before it really gets going. Oh…welcome to the Hot Seat Son!

Texas has PLENTY OF TALENT to win 8 games in 2017 with the below schedule remaining….

San Jose State
At USC
At Iowa State
Kansas State
Oklahoma
Oklahoma State
At Baylor
At TCU
Kansas
At West Virginia
Texas Tech

…and if Tom Herman expects to get his ass off the Hot Seat he better Damn win 8 games-plus this season!

7.  Brian Kelly, Notre Dame – Brian Kelly and the Irish got a nice win over a decent Temple team in Week 1 and now the 2017 season actually begins with a pretty good and very talented Georgia team coming to South Bend on Saturday evening. There’s a very good reason why Brian Kelly is on the Hot Seat and that is Kelly’s record over the past 5 seasons since Alabama BLASTED the Irish in the 2012-13 BCS National Title Game and that record is…

32 – 20 .615

…while averaging 7.75 wins per season and ANYTHING below 9 wins a season as head coach of Notre Dame your ass is AVERAGE and will place your ass on the…Yep…you got it…

Hot Seat!

We asked around with a few of our Notre Dame alum friends in the last few weeks how many wins that Brian Kelly needs to return to coach the Irish in 2018 and the consensus is…

10 wins-plus

….and we don’t think there is ANY chance of all of Notre Dame winning 10 games if the Irish lose to Georgia so Coach Hard Brian Kelly against the Dawgs!

8.  Chris Ash, Rutgers – Chris Ash’s Rutgers team played better against Washington they than the team played in almost any game in 2016 and now Ash will need to keep the improvement going in a HUGE and MUST WIN GAMES against Eastern Michigan at home on Saturday and then Morgan State on September 16 which would send the Scarlet Knights to Nebraska with a 2 – 1 record which would at least give Ash’s team some momentum and maybe his ass off the Hot Seat…or maybe not!

9.  Jim Mora, UCLA – We are not quite sure why the Hell the UCLA Bruins didn’t show up ready to play against Texas A&M on Sunday at the Rose Bowl but a Total Collapse by the Aggies plus a Bruins team that wouldn’t quit saved Mora from having the Hottest Seat in the America after Week 1 of the season and at least Jim Mora has that going for him!

Now at 1 – 0 on the season UCLA has left to play in 2017….

Hawaii
At Memphis
At Stanford
Colorado
At Arizona
Oregon
At Washington
At Utah
Arizona State
At USC
California

Damn…that’s a tough schedule and with Jim Mora needing at least 6 wins in 2017 to keep his job even with a MASSIVE buyout if fired it’s not going to be easy for UCLA to get to 6 wins unless they win their next 2 games to start at 3 – 0 before they head to The Farm to play Stanford on September 23.

10.  Bret Bielema, Arkansas – In 5 seasons at Arkansas Bret Bielema has the following records on the board…

Overall: 26 – 26

SEC: 10 – 22

…and that is what we would call Below Average for ANY Head Football Coach at Arkansas and we would recommend to both Bret Bielema and Arkansas AD Jeff Long that Bielema win at least 6 games in 2017 or both of them might find themselves out of a job come December which is why the next two games…

TCU
Texas A&M (Dallas)

…are MUST WIN GAMES before playing Cupcake New Mexico State on September 30 and then heading into the rest of the SEC schedule with a game at South Carolina.

If Arkansas does lose to TCU and Texas A&M to be at 2 – 2 at the end of September it’s not going to be easy to find 4 more wins among these last 8 games….

At South Carolina
At Alabama
Auburn
At Ole Miss
Coastal Carolina
At LSU
Mississippi State
Missouri

….with 6 wins total needed if Bielema wants to be employed in the State of Arkansas after December 2017!

#14 Hot Seat Head Coach – Butch Jones, Tennessee – “I think Jones is going to need 9 wins plus in ’17 to keep his job boys.” – Totally Transform Tennessee Football overnight and turn the SEC Conference on its head by getting off a plane in Knoxville to take the Vols job

 

#14 Hot Seat Head Coach – Butch Jones, Tennessee

We have enough contacts around the Southeastern United States now, including a few that live around Knoxville, Tennessee, to know that Tennessee Vols head coach Butch Jones is none too thrilled that his ass is now on the Hot Seat at Coaches Hot Seat and other media outlets that cover college football, but come now Butch…..we are talking about…

TENNESSEE FOOTBALL

…here Son and we will be Damned before anyone at Coaches Hot Seat is going to tolerate mediocrity at Tennessee or any other football school that should be an perennial power in college football.

When we say that we are not going to tolerate “mediocrity” at Tennessee what we mean is this…Butch Jones’ win/loss records in FOUR years at UT:

2013:  5 – 7
2014:  7 – 6
2015:  9 – 4
2016:  9 – 4

Overall:  30 – 21

SEC:  14 – 18

Yes…the above numbers..especially the last two years of 9 – 4 records are slightly above “mediocre” but let’s go inside those win/loss numbers to look at a few other key metrics:

Record Against Power 5 Conference Opponents:  18 – 21

Record Against Non-Power 5 Conference Opponents:  12 – 0

Record Against SEC East Opponents:  14 – 10

Record Against SEC West Opponents:  0 – 8

Now you understand why we have Butch Jones on the Hot Seat and if you still don’t understand let’s start with these Simple Facts

A.  In a time when the SEC East has been the WEAKEST it has been since the SEC Conference split into two divisions Tennessee under Butch Jones had a great opportunity to establish a presence in the SEC East over the last few years, but instead what Butch Jones has been doing is…

B.  Has Losing Record Against Power 5 Conference Opponents

C.  Is Cleaning Up….40% of his Wins…are against Non-Power 5 Opponents

D.  Barely has a Winning Record Against SEC East Teams

E.  Has Not Beaten Even ONE SEC West Team in Four Years

F.  Zero SEC Eastern Division Titles and ZERO Trips to SEC Championship Game

Oh…and here’s the REAL kicker….in 2015 + 2016 Tennessee easily had the most talented team in the SEC East and both times Butch Jones let Florida win the SEC East when anyone with a working brain knows the Gators had no Damn business playing in the SEC Championship Game the last two years!

Now here’s the REAL problem facing Butch Jones today…while Jones and the Vols have let two trips to the SEC Championship Game slip away the last two years when UT clearly had the most talented team in the SEC East, the rest of the Eastern Division has now caught up and entering the 2017 season the Vols no longer have the best roster in the East Division which are ranked below based upon talent:

1.  Georgia
2.  Florida
3.  Tennessee
4.  South Carolina
5.  Kentucky
6.  Missouri
7.  Vanderbilt

Yep…Butch Jones has gotten himself into a Helluva situation where he has two straight 9 win seasons on the board with Tennessee fans in both years expecting more like….

A Trip to the SEC Championship Game

…which UT fans should have been expecting since they had the best roster in the SEC East the last two seasons AND now Jones is facing a quickly improving SEC Eastern Division that will FORCE Butch Jones and his coaching staff to take it up a notch in 2017 or face a reckoning come late November of this year that could see another head coaching change in Knoxville…but more on that in a moment.

Let’s take a look at Tennessee’s 2017 football schedule:

Georgia Tech
Indiana State
At Florida
UMass
Georgia
South Carolina
At Alabama
At Kentucky
Southern Miss
At Missouri
LSU
Vanderbilt

Oh Butch Jones does have a Helluva situation on his hands with that schedule which has at least TEN teams on the Vols schedule that have a 50-50 or better chance of beating Tennessee AND in a season when UT fans will be looking for the Vols to win the SEC East for the first time since…..wait for it…..since…

2007!

What kind of records do we think Tennessee will finish with in 2017? Well if we had to guess and it’s only a guess which is our opinion of course we would say….

Overall:  7 – 5

SEC:  5 – 3

Is it even remotely possible that Butch Jones would be brought back to coach the Tennessee Vols in 2018 if he finishes 2017 with the above records?

Not A Chance In Hell!

Why do we say that you ask?

Because if Butch Jones goes 7 – 5 in 2017 that would open the door for the Tennessee Vols to hire the ONLY coach now on the market that could Totally Transform Tennessee Football overnight and turn the SEC Conference on its head by getting off a plane in Knoxville to take the Vols job.

Who exactly is that coach you ask?

Well…below is that coach’s records in the FOUR years he was a head coach in college football:

2009: 10 – 3 – Conference Champion – Rose Bowl
2010: 12 – 1 – Conference Champion – BCS National Title Game
2011: 12 – 2 – Conference Champion – Rose Bowl
2012: 12 – 1 – Tied for First in Division – Fiesta Bowl

Overall: 46 – 7

Conference: 33 – 3

3 Conference Championships in 4 Seasons

Who is the above coach you ask?

Why it’s former Oregon head football coach Chip Kelly who after a few years in the NFL may have figured out that it is NFL officials that determine the speed at which NFL games will be played and that if Chip Kelly is going to be a successful head coach again it will have to be on the college level.

Oh…here’s another little tidbit delivered by a friend of ours over lunch in San Francisco earlier this year:

“I think if Chip Kelly goes back into the college game he wants a shot at coaching in the SEC.”

Hmmmmm…..Chip Kelly’s attacking spread offense in the SEC and in the incredibly loud Neyland Stadium which only gets louder and Louder and LOUDER as the Vols pour on the points would be a Helluva frightening thought….to other SEC Conference Head Coaches…and it should be a Helluva frightening thought to Butch Jones as well because in our opinion….

If Chip Kelly was offered the Tennessee head coaching job he would accept it AND Chip Kelly would IMMEDIATELY start winning on a BIG scale in the SEC Conference and who does Tennessee open the 2018 college football season against you ask?

West Virginia in Charlotte

Oh that would be a Helluva Game to kick-off the Chip Kelly-era at Tennessee facing off against Crazy Dana Holgorsen and the Mountaineers in Charlotte!

Memo to Butch Jones:  Not that we have a clue Butch what the administration at the University of Tennessee is thinking, but we do know what a BIG alum + booster of Tennessee Football is thinking when he told us in March of this year the following:

“I think Jones is going to need 9 wins plus in ’17 to keep his job boys.”

There you have your Win Target Butch Jones = 9 Wins

Good Luck To You Son!

Oh for those Tennessee Football fans that aren’t like the Stanford folks at Coaches Hot Seat that got to see Chip Kelly’s teams at Oregon up close and personal for FOUR years here’s a little reminder of what Tennessee might just have in its future…maybe some of your remember this 35 point whipping that the Ducks put on the Vols in Neyland Stadium in 2010?

That sound you just heard were head coaches around the SEC Conference saying:

“Let sure the Hell hope they don’t hire Chip Kelly at Tennessee!”

Oh..here’s the 2011 Oregon at Stanford game we are still trying to forget!

#12 Hot Seat Head Coach – Chris Ash, Rutgers – #13 Hot Seat Head Coach – Brad Lambert, Charlotte

 

#12 Hot Seat Head Coach – Chris Ash, Rutgers

It is going to be very interesting to see if native of Ottumwa, Iowa Chris Ash can be a success as a head coach at Rutgers which is defacto foreign country to folks that didn’t grow up in the New York – New Jersey region of America, and if Ash is a success in turning Rutgers into again a semi-respectable football team then he will have achieved something mighty impressive indeed.

In the previous 20 years before Chris Ash took over the Rutgers head coaching job in 2016 the Scarlet Knights….playing in sub-par conferences to the Big Ten for 18 of those 20 years….Rutgers posted .500 or better regular season records in….

8 of 20 seasons

….with 6 of those .500 or better regular seasons coming under now Ohio State defensive coordinator Greg Schiano.

The problem that Chris Ash has to deal with as opposed to most Rutgers head football coaches in the past is that the Scarlett Knights are now playing in the very tough….

Big Ten East Division

…which includes the likes of…

Penn State
Ohio State
Michigan
Indiana
Maryland
Michigan State

….in addition to Rutgers and in our opinion with the Big Ten now playing 9 conference games…

As EVERY Conference in America should be playing today and if you are playing 8 Conference Games like the SEC and ACC you are nothing but Total Damn Cowards and you sure the Hell were not raised by Real American since Real Americans are not Damn Cowards = SEC and ACC Conferences

….if Chris Ash or ANY Rutgers head football coach in the foreseeable future is able to post 6 plus wins a year that will be a MAJOR accomplishment.

In his first year on the job at Rutgers Chris Ash posted records of…

Overall:  2 – 10

Big Ten:  0 – 9

….and in 2017 Rutgers is scheduled to play:

Washington
Eastern Michigan
Morgan State
At Nebraska
Ohio State
At Illinois
Purdue
At Michigan
Maryland
At Penn State
At Indiana
Michigan State

With ONE sure win on the schedule in Morgan State it looks like 2017 is going to be another slog for Chris Ash and his Rutgers football team which we see posting a record of…

3 – 9 or 4 – 8 at best

….and no doubt if that happens this time next Chris Ash’s rear-end will still be on the Hot Seat heading into the 2018 college football season!

 

#13 Hot Seat Head Coach – Brad Lambert, Charlotte

2017 will be Brad Lambert’s FIFTH season as the head coach of the Charlotte 49ers who will be entering their THIRD season playing on the FBS level in Conference USA. In the first two seasons in FBS Brad Lambert and his Charlotte football team posted records of…

2015:  2 – 10
2016:  4 – 8

…and Lambert’s records are….

Overall:  16 – 30

CUSA:  3 – 13

Considering the above records so far what are the chances that Brad Lambert can turn Charlotte into a .500-plus team playing in Conference USA on a regular basis?

The chances are Warm-To-Midland at best and primarily because Conference USA has some pretty good football programs in it right now, and secondly because there are very few football programs that have made the jump to FBS and won on a consistent basis until they were an established program for many years.

With the above in mind let’s go to Charlotte’s 2017 schedule:

At Eastern Michigan
At Kansas State
NC A&T
Georgia State
At FIU
Marshall
At Western Kentucky
UAB
At Old Dominion
Middle Tennessee
At Southern Miss
FAU

Looking over the above schedule we give Charlotte a 50-50 or better chance of winning about…

7 of their 12 games in 2017

…and with that in mind we are expecting Brad Lambert to have his Charlotte team fighting for a bowl berth towards the end of the 2017 season and if not we all know what that means….Yep….Hot Seat for Brad Lambert!

#6 Hot Seat Head Coach – Paul Haynes, Kent State AND #7 Hot Seat Head Coach – Bret Bielema, Arkansas – The Voodoo Hex and “Because the boy likes to eat, can tell a joke and has a great looking wife!”

 

#6 Hot Seat Head Coach – Paul Haynes, Kent State

Considering that Paul Haynes took over the Kent State football team in the 2013 season that in the year before in 2012 had posted a record of 11 – 3 it’s hard for us to understand how Haynes is still the head coach at KSU considering his records…

Overall:  12 – 35

MAC:  8 – 23

….in FOUR years on the job but then as one of our old bosses used to tell us…

“The world needs average folks boys because not everyone can be great!”

Let’s check out Paul Haynes yearly records at Kent State:

2013:  4 – 8
2014:  2 – 9
2015:  3 – 9
2016:  3 – 9

OK….can someone explain to us how Paul Haynes is still the head football coach at Kent State?

We have heard more sound in the middle of Death Valley on a cloudless night that what we just heard in folks answering the above question!

Let’s take a look at Kent State’s 2017 football schedule:

At Clemson
Howard
At Marshall
At Louisville
Buffalo
At Northern Illinois
Miami (Ohio)
At Ohio
Bowling Green
At Western Michigan
Central Michigan
At Akron

Geez…that’s a pretty tough schedule and if we had to guess the Golden Flashes will probably end up with records come December of….

Overall:  3 – 9

MAC:  2 – 6

With a record of 3 – 9 in Paul Hayne’s FIFTH season on the job at Kent State cost him his job?

3- 9 sure the Hell hasn’t so far!

 

#7 Hot Seat Head Coach – Bret Bielema, Arkansas

A good Arkansas-alum friend of ours who lives in Ft. Smith, Arkansas and was with his wife in San Francisco recently on a business trip told us at dinner one night the following about Arkansas head coach Bret Bielema:

“Whatever the Hell voodoo hex that Bielema has over Arkansas fans is something I would love to bottle and sell to football coaches everywhere, because there’s no explanation for someone having a 10 – 22 record in SEC play in four seasons on the job having his ass kissed pretty much around the clock by Hog fans!”

Let’s take a look at Bret Bielema’s records at Arkansas with FOUR years on the books:

Overall:  25 – 26

SEC:  10 – 22

Woooooo Pig that’s BAD but then when have some kind of voodoo hex going for you just might be able to have TEN conference wins on the books after FOUR years on the job, but now let’s look at the FOUR most successful Arkansas coaches’ conference records in the post Frank Broyles era to compare to Bielema and those four coaches would be:

Lou Holtz (Southwest Conference):  37 – 18 – 1  (.670)

Ken Hatfield (Southwest Conference):  36 – 10  (.783)

Houston Nutt (SEC Conference):  42 – 38  (.525)

Bobby Petrino (SEC Conference):  17 – 15  (.531)

AND

Bret Bielema (SEC Conference):  10 – 22  (.313)

What the Hell?

Besides talking to our good buddy from Ft. Smith, Arkansas who is pissed as Hell that Below Average As Hell is now acceptable to fans of Arkansas football…

“Because the boy likes to eat, can tell a joke and has a great looking wife!”

….we have reached out to some other folks we have known over the years in the Great State of Arkansas including one who knew Bill Clinton really well when Brother Bill was Governor of Arkansas (Oh, this guy has some great stories about Brother Bill that we wish we could put in this blog!), and when we asked him about the current state of Arkansas football and Bret Bielema his response was:

Long Silence….A Loud Sigh……and then….

“Hell…I don’t know but I do know this….my Son who went to Arkansas was over at my place for dinner couple of weeks back with his wife and kids and he told me he had heard someone say that Bielema’s record against SEC West teams was 7 – 17, and I decided to look it up myself and Damn isn’t Bielema’s record against SEC West teams is 7 – 17! That’s not good boys…that’s just no Damn good at all!”

Yep…Bret Bielema’s record against SEC West teams is 7 – 17 in FOUR years on the job and below are his records against those SEC West teams:

Alabama:  0 – 4
Auburn:  1 – 3
LSU:  2 – 2
Mississippi:  3 – 1
Mississippi State:  1 – 3
Texas A&M:  0 – 4

As many people in the South often say when they see their educational systems ranked towards the bottom nationally…

“Thank God For Mississippi!”

….and in this case Bret Bielema can “Thank God For Mississippi” because without those three wins over the Rebels his SEC record at Arkansas would move from…

Devastatingly Bad to Biblically Bad!

So the real question here is how long can Arkansas Football be Below Average As Hell under Bret Bielema who we remind everyone is making $4 Million Dollars Plus a year to win football games for the Razorbacks?

Consider this little factoid which is another example about how…

Athletic Directors are the easiest Damn folks in America to roll

…if fired before 2018 Bret Bielema’s buyout of his Arkansas contract is…

$15.4 Million Dollars!

There might be ONE…maybe TWO Morons in America that would give a contract like that to a coach that was not a sitting Athletic Director and no doubt Bret Bielema’s agent is right now having a good laugh at the contract he got from Arkansas AD Jeff Long for Bielema which in our opinion is borderline a criminal act against Arkansas football fans which pay ALL the bills in Fayetteville!

Let’s go to the Arkansas 2017 schedule to see where this situation at Arkansas may be when December rolls around:

Florida A&M
TCU
Bye Week
Texas A&M – Dallas
New Mexico State
At South Carolina
At Alabama
Auburn
At Ole Miss
Coastal Carolina
At LSU
Mississippi State
Missouri

The above schedule has TWO cupcakes in Florida A&M and New Mexico State and TWO pretty tough games against TCU and Coastal Carolina (which is no joke team moving up from FCS) out-of-conference so if we had to guess right now Bret Bielema and Arkansas will finish with the below records in 2017:

Overall:  6 – 6

SEC:  3 – 5

Could Bret Bielema survive putting up the above records in his FIFTH season on the job at Arkansas considering he would have a buyout north of $15 Million Dollars if fired?

Not a chance in Hell nor would Arkansas AD Jeff Long with both of them being run out of Fayetteville on a rail by the middle of December!

#1 Hot Seat CFB Head Coach – 2017 Coach and Season Preview for Ole Miss Rebels – Hugh Freeze, Ole Miss

 

With the 2017 College Football Season now only…

160 Days Away

….we begin to look at the College Coaches and Teams for the upcoming season starting with the new #1 Hot Seat Head Coach…

Hugh Freeze, Ole Miss Rebels

2017 Coach and Season Preview for Ole Miss Rebels

Hugh Freeze, Ole Miss

Overall Record: 69 – 32

Ole Miss Record
Overall: 39 – 25
SEC: 19 – 21

We have been talking to our good friends in the Great State of Mississippi over the past few weeks, and the word on the dirt roads of Rebel Country in and around the Square in Oxford is that Hugh Freeze’s future employment at Ole Miss hinges on the final..or maybe “signaled” punishment handed down by the NCAA. None of our friends could get a straight answer to a straight question, but they did get the feeling that the following will happen relative to Hugh Freeze’s future:

If Hugh Freeze is suspended for 6 or more football games

AND/OR

Ole Miss gets a 2-plus year bowl ban

AND/OR

Ole Miss loses 12+ scholarships or 2+ more than they have self-imposed

Then the Hugh Freeze Era at Ole Miss will be over.

We haven’t a clue when the NCAA would rule on the Ole Miss situation, but it’s already late March and we guess the final ruling could come down before the end of the year which might indeed be Hugh Freeze’s last in Oxford, and with that in mind let’s get to the Rebels 2017 Football Schedule:

South Alabama
UT Martin
At California
Bye Week
At Alabama
At Auburn
Vanderbilt
LSU
Arkansas
At Kentucky
La. Lafayette
Texas A&M
At Mississippi State

In Hugh Freeze’s sixth season at Ole Miss with no NCAA issues the Rebels would probably be favored to win 8+ games, but the NCAA has already caused some damage to Ole Miss football with more damage coming even if the NCAA agrees with the folks in Oxford’s self-imposed punishment.

How many wins do we think Ole Miss will have in 2017?

Overall Record:  5 – 7

SEC Record:  2 – 6

Just a guess…maybe the NCAA will “signal” to the administration at Ole Miss that if “X” happens meaning that if Hugh Freeze and maybe others are relieved of their duties at the school the NCAA will accept the Ole Miss self-imposed penalties, but even if the NCAA doesn’t punish the Rebels further it’s looking like 2017 will be a losing season and we find it hard to believe Hugh Freeze could survive that unless the NCAA doesn’t impose any other penalties and then maybe just maybe…BARELY…Hugh Freeze will survive in Oxford past this coming December.

Here’s how Hugh Freeze gets out of his current bind still holding the head coaching job at Ole Miss:

1.  The NCAA accepts the Ole Miss self-imposed penalties or barely adds to them

2. Nothing else comes out implicating the Ole Miss football program

3. Ole Miss wins at least 5 games overall and 2 games in SEC play in 2017

Yes…Hugh Freeze can pull a Houdini-trick and get out of this mess, but the margin for error is smaller than paper thin….it’s Atom Thin!

Memo to Coach Hugh Freeze: We leave you with the Serenity Prayer by American theologian Reinhold Niebuhr:

“God, give us grace to accept with serenity the things that cannot be changed, courage to change the things which should be changed, and the wisdom to distinguish the one from the other.”

Good Luck Coach Freeze!

We Got The Flat-Ass Skinny on Les Miles Status at LSU When We Were in Ponte Vedra Beach, Florida for The Players Championship Last Week From A Buddy of Ours From Baton Rouge and We Have Some News For Les Miles —> Either Win BIG Son Or You Are DONE Down on the Bayou!

 

We here at Coaches Hot Seat waited until The Players Championship which many of us attended this past week in Ponte Vedra Beach, Florida to write about Les Miles in 2016 because we knew that one of our good buddies from Baton Rouge would be joining us at the beach and that we would get the…

Flat-Ass Skinny on Les Miles Status at LSU

….and as they say in the Bayou…

That Is Exactly Damn What We Got!

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A Helluva lot has been written about Les Miles near dismissal as the head football coach at LSU last November, but let’s cut through the Bullshit and get the following down on the barrelhead:

If the state of Louisiana have had a pot to piss in Les Miles would have lost his job last November…PERIOD!

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In the end it was the FACT that the state of Louisiana was flat-broke last November that save Les Miles Precious Ass and with thousands of folks in Louisiana hurting it would have looked very Damn bad to have sent Les Miles packing with a $18 Million Dollar buyout and there you have why Les Miles is still the head coach at LSU today.

As for the reasons why Les Miles should have been fired last November let’s go Joe Friday and give you a Helluva good reason why Les Miles is very Damn lucky to have a head coaching job in Baton Rouge today:

Since LSU lost to Alabama in the 2011 – 2012 Bogus BCS National Championship Game in New Orleans which encompasses the last FOUR college football seasons Les Miles has put up records of…

Overall:  37 – 14

SEC:  20 – 12

OK…those aren’t bad Overall and SEC Win/Loss records over the past FOUR seasons for Les Miles at LSU…BUT….let’s go Joe Friday again and say this time…

Just The Facts Ma’am

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….because we are talking about LSU Football here where Bozo the Clown could recruit Top 10 Recruiting Classes each year and where Les Miles has averaged over the last EIGHT seasons signing the…

No. 7 Recruiting Class in American according to Rivals.com

Oh….but if you are landing Top 10 Recruiting Classes on a regular basis…as Les Miles has done at LSU…one would think that your Win/Loss records against teams with .500 or better records would be pretty Damn good…right?

RIGHT…but NOT for Les Miles folks!

Let’s bring Joe Friday in with the FACTS and as they say on the Bayou…these FACTS are not pretty!

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In the last FOUR seasons Les Miles LSU Football Teams have played….

34 Games against FBS teams with .500 or better records and Les Miles’ record in those 34 games is…

19 – 15  (.559)

In the last FOUR seasons Les Miles LSU Football Teams have played…

29 Games in the SEC against teams with .500 or better records and Les Miles’ record in those 29 games is…

16 – 13  (.552)

Oh…that’s bad enough if not outright Very Damn Embarrassing for LSU Football….BUT….did we mention that Les Miles LSU Football Teams have lost…

FIVE straight games to Nick Saban and Alabama?

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So here is what you have on your hands now fans of LSU football….

You have a head coach in Les Miles that not only has lost FIVE straight games to Nick Saban and Alabama but you have a head coach in Les Miles that is making over $4 Million Dollars A Year posting winning percentages against teams with .500 or better records of…

Overall against .500 or better teams = .559

SEC against .500 or better teams = .552

Uhhh…got that is A Damn Joke Les Miles and by all rights your Ass Should Have Been Run Out of Baton Rouge and WOULD have been run out of Baton Rouge last November if…

The State of Louisiana had not been Dead Damn Broke!

Now let’s get back to the….

Flat-Ass Skinny on Les Miles Status at LSU

…that our buddy from Baton Rouge gave us in Ponte Vedra Beach, Florida this past week which is…

“Les Miles HAS TO beat Alabama and win the SEC West in 2016 or he will not be employed at LSU in early December.”

Well Hell…that’s about as….

Flat-Ass Skinny on Les Miles Status at LSU

…that one can get and with that mind let’s go to LSU’s 2016 Football Schedule to see if Les Miles is indeed looking at his last season down on the Bayou:

Wisconsin – Lambeau Field
Jacksonville State
Mississippi State
At Auburn
Missouri
At Florida
Southern Miss
Ole Miss
Alabama
At Arkansas
South Alabama
At Texas A&M

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Well…Bozo the Clown or any Coonass in Louisiana…a term that Nick Saban knows well…could win…

4 Games coaching LSU in 2016

….but the question is how many games will Les Miles win in 2016 or rather the question is can Les Miles and his LSU Football Team BEAT Alabama and win the SEC West Division to save Les Miles job?

Not A Damn Chance in Hell….in our humble opinion!

How many games will Les Miles win in 2016….in our humble opinion?

7..maybe 8 Wins…for Les Miles and his LSU Football Team in 2016

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And if that happens as the Great Dandy Don Meredith used to say…or rather sing….

Turn Out the Lights on Les Miles Ass on the Bayou!

Gus Malzahn Is Sitting On One of the Hottest Seats in College Football Entering the 2016 College Football Season….and Should Be After What Was Nothing Less Than A Complete Freaking Disaster For Auburn Football In 2015! – Our Contact “Around” Auburn Lays Out the Reality That Now Faces Gus Malzahn AND Auburn AD Jay Jacobs = 2016 Is A Critical Year For BOTH Men! – Good Luck Gus!

 

OK…we West Coasters at Coaches Hot Seat will admit it…

We are loving us some SEC Football

….and since the late 1980s when a few Coaches Hot Seat members were serving in the US Navy in the Jacksonville, Florida area when a couple of us first ran into the Head Ball Coach Steve Spurrier at a Florida practice in Gainesville we have been lucky enough to have seen 100+ SEC football games in person, and there is not a more passionate place that loves their football more than at…

Auburn University!

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Yes….the folks at Alabama love their football team BUT not more than the folks at Auburn love theirs and that is why there is so much distress these days on The Plains because the Mighty Alabama Crimson Tide under Nick Saban has won…

4 of the last 7 National Championships

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….while Auburn has won what exactly?

ONE National Championship since 1957!

Yes…current Auburn head coach Gus Malzahn took the Auburn Tigers to the National Title Game in 2013 after what were nothing less than…

Two Luckier Than Hell Plays Against Georgia and Alabama at the end of the 2013 season

….BUT since Auburn lost to FSU in that 2013-14 Bogus BCS National Title Game one Gus Malzahn has put-up records of….

Overall:  15 – 11

SEC:  6 – 10

….over the last two seasons and we have some news for Gus Malzahn and his immediate family:

If there is not SIGNIFICANT improvement in the Auburn Tigers football team in 2016 Auburn will be looking for a new head football coach come December.

Now…we here at Coaches Hot Seat being good business folks or what they would call “bidness folks” in the South have always made a point of making lots of contacts during our business endeavors, and that approach has extended to the great game of college football during our 40-plus years of watching this great game, and we now have a group of contacts across college football that we believe rivals anyone….and we happen to have a GREAT contact “around” Auburn who we have been talking to a lot over the past 6 months on the status of one….Gus Malzahn.

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We recently talked again to our contact “around” Auburn and asked him straight-out:

Coaches Hot Seat:  “What does Gus Malzahn have to do in 2016 to keep his job at Auburn?”

Auburn Contact:  “Whoa now boys…no one said Gus Malzahn is about t o be fired…but I will say there is plenty of pink paper in the Auburn athletic offices at the ready if Malzahn and his football team don’t perform this season and a pink slip has to be delivered.”

Coaches Hot Seat:  “What the Hell does that mean?”

Auburn Contact:  “Well now boys….Jay Jacobs (the Auburn AD) thinks very highly of the Auburn football program and believes it should compete toe-to-toe with Alabama and other SEC heavyweights EVERY year and if Malzahn should have another 8, 7 or Heaven help us 6 win or less season then Jacobs will no doubt have a list of coaches at the ready to make a move later this year.”

Coaches Hot Seat:  “Any guesses who might be on Jay Jacobs short-list to replace a fired Gus Malzahn?”

Auburn Contact:  “Well boys…you didn’t hear this from me….but if you asked me to guess I would think Jay’s list would include…in order mind you…

Jimbo Fisher
Mark Dantonio
Art Briles
Gary Patterson
Dan Mullen
Tom Herman

Coaches Hot Seat:  “Geez…that’s a pretty strong list of coaches!”

Auburn Contact:  “Well boys….if Jay Jacobs has to fire a third head football coach (Tuberville, Chizik, Malzahn) since 2008 you can bet your bottom Dollar this time Jay will go big and be bringing a Heckuva lot of money with him…..meaning Saban-type money.”

Coaches Hot Seat:  “That would be $7 million dollars plus per season.”

Auburn Contact:  “Exactly….Auburn cannot make another mistake in hiring its next coach…that is if Jay Jacobs is given the chance to hire the next coach, because if Malzahn should someone not win 6 or more games in 2016 then Jay Jacobs may be fired right before Gus Malzahn is.”

Coaches Hot Seat:  “That would be carnage on The Plains.”

Auburn Contact:  “It would be carnage in the family….but sometimes a good housecleaning is needed and Auburn may need that is this season implodes under Gus (Malzahn).”

OK…it seems pretty clear to us that Gus Malzahn is sitting on one of the Hottest Damn Seats in College Football and should be with records the last two seasons at Auburn of…

Overall:  15 – 11

SEC:  6 – 10

….so let’s go the numbers and look at Auburn’s 2016 schedule.

Gus Malzahn, Auburn

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4 th season at South Carolina

Overall Head Coaching Record (Arkansas State + Auburn):  36 – 16

Auburn Head Coaching Record

Overall:  27 – 17

SEC:  13 – 11

Let’s look at Auburn’s 2016 football schedule:

Clemson
Arkansas State
Texas A&M
LSU
La. Monroe
At Mississippi State
Arkansas
At Ole Miss
Vanderbilt
At Georgia
Alabama A&M
At Alabama

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OK….Bozo the Clown or ANY Damn Clown you can think of could win…

3 Football Games

….coaching Auburn in 2016 BUT as we look at the rest of Auburn’s schedule which begins with FIVE straight home games we are thinking that Gus Malzahn and his Auburn Tigers better Damn be NO worse than…

4 – 1

…when they travel to play at Mississippi State on October 8 because we see FOUR serious potential losses in Auburn’s last SEVEN games…

At Mississippi State
At Ole Miss
At Georgia
At Alabama

Here’s the problem for Gus Malzahn….in our opinion if Auburn finishes with a record worse than…

8 – 4 overall

5 – 3 in SEC play

….Gus Malzahn is going to be in a Helluva spot when the Alabama game is over on November 26 and if Auburn finishes at…

7 – 5 overall

4 – 4 in SEC play

….in 2016 which would leave Malzahn’s the last THREE seasons at Auburn standing at…

Overall:  22 – 16

SEC:  10 – 14

….then Gus Malzahn is….

DONE at Auburn…PERIOD!

Hell….with 3 games at home against Clemson, Texas A&M, and LSU in the first 5 weeks of the season Gus Malzahn could be DONE at Auburn before October 1 if the Tigers somehow tripped up and lost those 3 CRITICAL games!

Memo to Gus Malzahn:  Coach YOUR football team YOUR way in 2016 because there’s a very Damn good chance this will be YOUR last year at Auburn unless there is dramatic improvement from the Tigers football team of 2016 which in our opinion was nothing short of a…

Complete Freaking Disaster!

….because when you finish at…

2 – 6 in SEC play

….at Auburn that is just flat-out a…

Complete Freaking Disaster!

Good Luck Gus!

It’s “Fish Or Cut Bait Time” for Will Muschamp at South Carolina…and if Muschamp Doesn’t “Get It Done” in Columbia His Head Coaching Career Will Be Over…Before He Hits the Age of 50! – Happy Birthday to the Head Ball Coach Steve Spurrier! 71 Years Young Today! – The Late Great Lewis Grizzard and An Eternal Truth…You Are Missed Lewis But NEVER Forgotten!

 

In the 16 or so years since Will Muschamp first ran into Nick Saban in Atlanta….which if we remember right was around 2000 at a high school football game or camp at the Georgia Dome….Muschamp has made quite a few stops including at LSU, Miami Dolphins, Auburn, Texas, the Florida head coaching job, and now the South Carolina head coaching job, and as they say in the South it’s now….

Fish or Cut Bait Time for Will Muschamp

….because if Will Muschamp doesn’t get it done at South Carolina NOW his head coaching career will be over before he hits the age of 50!

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What exactly does….

“Get It Done”

….mean in the context of being successful at South Carolina which in recent years has seen some success under Steve Spurrier…who by the way turns 71 years old today on April 20…so Happy Birthday to the Head Ball Coach who is now 71 years young!

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In our opinion here at Coaches Hot Seat if we were hired as the athletic director at South Carolina today we would call Will Muschamp into our office and outline how we would define his time at USC as a “success” or not in the following way:

Running a clean program that did not break ANY NCAA rules

Graduating most if not all of the South Carolina football players

A .500 or plus record and bowl game trip EVERY YEAR

A Top 3 finish in the SEC East EVERY YEAR

Win the SEC East ONCE every THREE YEARS

Win the SEC Conference Championship ONCE every SEVEN YEARS

Can Will Muschamp meet the expectations as described above that Coaches Hot Seat as the AD at South Carolina has set for him going forward?

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Well….let’s see how Steve Spurrier would have done against the above expectations…who in our opinion is one of the Top 5 All-Time Head Coaches in SEC Football history:

YES = Running a clean program that did not break ANY NCAA rules

YES = Graduating most if not all of the South Carolina football players

9 out of 11 years so NO = A .500 or plus record and bowl game trip EVERY YEAR

6 out of 11 years so NO = A Top 3 finish in the SEC East EVERY YEAR

1 out of 11 years so NO = Win the SEC East ONCE every THREE YEARS

0 out of 11 years so NO = Win the SEC Conference Championship ONCE every SEVEN YEARS

So let’s see here…Steve Spurrier…a Top 5 All-Time Head Coach in SEC History did not meet our expectations for South Carolina football and Will Muschamp who is sitting on a head coaching record in four years at Florida of…

Overall:  28 – 21

SEC:  17 – 15

….will meet our expectations in Columbia?

Not Very Damn Likely!

Before we get to what Will Muschamp faces in the 2016 football season at South Carolina, let us first say that Muschamp does have one very Damn good thing going for him and that is…

South Carolina is in the SEC Eastern Division

….which is a division where even a slightly-elevated performance on a consistent basis above the norm by Tennessee, Florida, Georgia, Missouri, or South Carolina who can all get plenty of talent on campus to win lots of football games can lead to an extended run that would lead to many appearances in the SEC Championship Game as the SEC Eastern Division Champ and as Carl Spackler….Bill Murray….said in Caddyshack…..Will Muschamp has….

“That going for him…which is nice!”

Will Muschamp, South Carolina

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1 st season at South Carolina

Overall Head Coaching Record (Florida): 28 – 21

SEC (Florida): 17 – 15

The First and Primary Question for Will Muschamp as of today is: How many games does Will Muschamp need to win at South Carolina in 2016 to get his ass off the Hot Seat and to build some momentum for the future in Columbia?

Let’s go to South Carolina’s 2016 schedule to answer that question:

At Vanderbilt
At Mississippi State
East Carolina
At Kentucky
Texas A&M
Georgia
UMass
Tennessee
Missouri
At Florida
Western Carolina
At Clemson

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OK….Bozo the Clown or ANY Damn Clown you can think of could win…

2 Football Games

….coaching South Carolina in 2016 BUT as we look at the rest of the Gamecocks schedule this coming season we are beginning to think that…

Will Muschamp will be Very Damn Lucky to coach South Carolina to 6+ wins in 2016!

With that in mind IF Will Muschamp can get SIX wins in 2016 and get the Gamecocks to a bowl game we would call that a significant achievement which would get Muschamp off the Hot Seat heading into the 2017 football season BUT if we had to guess right now how many games the Gamecocks will win in the upcoming season we would guess…

4 Wins!

Memo to Will Muschamp and South Carolina AD Ray Tanner:  If South Carolina only wins FOUR football games in 2016 BOTH of your asses will be roasting come December which we guess would lead to…

Ray Tanner being forced to resign as the AD at South Carolina before Christmas

AND

Will Muschamp entering the 2017 college football season on one of the Hottest Seats in the American Republic!

With all of the above being said we can only wish….

Good Luck to Coach Boom and South Carolina in 2016

….and remind Will Muschamp and everyone else of the wise words of the Late Great Lewis Grizzard:

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“Life is like a dogsled race. If you ain’t the lead dog, the scenery never changes.”