In the 16 or so years since Will Muschamp first ran into Nick Saban in Atlanta….which if we remember right was around 2000 at a high school football game or camp at the Georgia Dome….Muschamp has made quite a few stops including at LSU, Miami Dolphins, Auburn, Texas, the Florida head coaching job, and now the South Carolina head coaching job, and as they say in the South it’s now….
Fish or Cut Bait Time for Will Muschamp
….because if Will Muschamp doesn’t get it done at South Carolina NOW his head coaching career will be over before he hits the age of 50!
What exactly does….
“Get It Done”
….mean in the context of being successful at South Carolina which in recent years has seen some success under Steve Spurrier…who by the way turns 71 years old today on April 20…so Happy Birthday to the Head Ball Coach who is now 71 years young!
In our opinion here at Coaches Hot Seat if we were hired as the athletic director at South Carolina today we would call Will Muschamp into our office and outline how we would define his time at USC as a “success” or not in the following way:
Running a clean program that did not break ANY NCAA rules
Graduating most if not all of the South Carolina football players
A .500 or plus record and bowl game trip EVERY YEAR
A Top 3 finish in the SEC East EVERY YEAR
Win the SEC East ONCE every THREE YEARS
Win the SEC Conference Championship ONCE every SEVEN YEARS
Can Will Muschamp meet the expectations as described above that Coaches Hot Seat as the AD at South Carolina has set for him going forward?
Well….let’s see how Steve Spurrier would have done against the above expectations…who in our opinion is one of the Top 5 All-Time Head Coaches in SEC Football history:
YES = Running a clean program that did not break ANY NCAA rules
YES = Graduating most if not all of the South Carolina football players
9 out of 11 years so NO = A .500 or plus record and bowl game trip EVERY YEAR
6 out of 11 years so NO = A Top 3 finish in the SEC East EVERY YEAR
1 out of 11 years so NO = Win the SEC East ONCE every THREE YEARS
0 out of 11 years so NO = Win the SEC Conference Championship ONCE every SEVEN YEARS
So let’s see here…Steve Spurrier…a Top 5 All-Time Head Coach in SEC History did not meet our expectations for South Carolina football and Will Muschamp who is sitting on a head coaching record in four years at Florida of…
Overall: 28 – 21
SEC: 17 – 15
….will meet our expectations in Columbia?
Not Very Damn Likely!
Before we get to what Will Muschamp faces in the 2016 football season at South Carolina, let us first say that Muschamp does have one very Damn good thing going for him and that is…
South Carolina is in the SEC Eastern Division
….which is a division where even a slightly-elevated performance on a consistent basis above the norm by Tennessee, Florida, Georgia, Missouri, or South Carolina who can all get plenty of talent on campus to win lots of football games can lead to an extended run that would lead to many appearances in the SEC Championship Game as the SEC Eastern Division Champ and as Carl Spackler….Bill Murray….said in Caddyshack…..Will Muschamp has….
“That going for him…which is nice!”
Will Muschamp, South Carolina
1 st season at South Carolina
Overall Head Coaching Record (Florida): 28 – 21
SEC (Florida): 17 – 15
The First and Primary Question for Will Muschamp as of today is: How many games does Will Muschamp need to win at South Carolina in 2016 to get his ass off the Hot Seat and to build some momentum for the future in Columbia?
At Vanderbilt At Mississippi State East Carolina At Kentucky Texas A&M Georgia UMass Tennessee Missouri At Florida Western Carolina At Clemson
OK….Bozo the Clown or ANY Damn Clown you can think of could win…
2 Football Games
….coaching South Carolina in 2016 BUT as we look at the rest of the Gamecocks schedule this coming season we are beginning to think that…
Will Muschamp will be Very Damn Lucky to coach South Carolina to 6+ wins in 2016!
With that in mind IF Will Muschamp can get SIX wins in 2016 and get the Gamecocks to a bowl game we would call that a significant achievement which would get Muschamp off the Hot Seat heading into the 2017 football season BUT if we had to guess right now how many games the Gamecocks will win in the upcoming season we would guess…
Memo to Will Muschamp and South Carolina AD Ray Tanner: If South Carolina only wins FOUR football games in 2016 BOTH of your asses will be roasting come December which we guess would lead to…
Ray Tanner being forced to resign as the AD at South Carolina before Christmas
Will Muschamp entering the 2017 college football season on one of the Hottest Seats in the American Republic!
With all of the above being said we can only wish….
Good Luck to Coach Boom and South Carolina in 2016
….and remind Will Muschamp and everyone else of the wise words of the Late Great Lewis Grizzard:
“Life is like a dogsled race. If you ain’t the lead dog, the scenery never changes.”
It wasn’t the Ides of March, otherwise known as 15 March on the Roman calendar which historically marks the assassination of Julius Caesar in 44 BC outside the Theater of Pompey in Rome…
….but it was something close and is now being referred to at Coaches Hot Seat as…
Beware the Ides of April
…because over this past weekend a bloodless coup of sorts was undertaken to oust the “younger crowd” from editorial control of Coaches Hot Seat and return to power what we like to call the…
“Balboa Café Seven”
….in reference to the original seven Mercury astronauts and the original seven members of Coaches Hot Seat, the “Balboa Café Seven”, that hatched the idea behind Coaches Hot Seat at the Balboa Café in the Marina District of San Francisco in the Fall of 2006 in an effort to push the ouster of then Stanford head football coach Walt Harris! Of course, Jim Harbaugh followed Walt Harris as the Stanford head football coach and the last NINE years is some amazing history for Cardinal Football, and we here at Coaches Hot Seat have had a Helluva fun time too!
As anyone that has followed and read Coaches Hot Seat over the past NINE college football seasons the general approach here has been to…
Light-Up the Asses of Coaches on the Hot Seat
….and let the coaching bodies fall where they may and for Damn sure….
There have been a Helluva lot of Head Coaches bodies fall over the past NINE college football seasons!
After a mini-rebellion of sorts the “Balboa Café Seven” now have their hands back on the editorial wheel at Coaches Hot Seat after a clear majority of the 147 members at Coaches Hot Seat decided to go ahead with the coup, which was bloodless, but not without a lot of crying, moaning, and begging by the “younger” crowd to give them another chance to make things right….Sorry….you had your chance boys but now step-aside because we have a Helluva lot of work to do before the 2016 College Football Season kicks-off!
What were the primary reasons for ousting the “younger” crowd at Coaches Hot Seat that had the editorial wheel of the website for less than a year now you ask?
To put it simply many at Coaches Hot Seat felt that the “younger” crowd at Coaches Hot Seat was…
Too Damn Easy on the Head Coaches
Too Damn Easy on the Athletic Directors
Too Damn Easy on the Clowns behind the College Football Playoff
Too Damn Easy on the Bastards at the NCAA
Too Damn Easy on the Bastards running the Bowl Games
Too Damn Easy on the Bastards in the Media
Bottom-Line: The majority of Coaches Hot Seat felt that the “younger” crowd which took over running the day-to-day operations of Coaches Hot Seat last Summer were just flat-out…
Too Damn Easy on Everyone!
….which has led to the “Balboa Café Seven” being put back in charge and now back on the job and needless to say they have a Helluva lot to say and why the Hell not get this ship righted right Damn now by getting back in the Damn saddle and get at the….
…..starting with the #1 spot and working our way down…and what head coach now sits in the #1 Hot Seat on the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings you ask?
Why Texas A&M Head Coach Kevin Sumlin!
Kevin Sumlin, Texas A&M
5 th season at Texas A&M in 2016
Overall Record: 36 – 16
SEC: 17 – 15
Anyone that has read the Coaches Hot Seat Blog in recent years knows our affection for all-things Texas A&M and that is reason #1 and the best Damn reason why we are just…
NOT Going To Tolerate Mediocrity at Texas A&M
…and Kevin Sumlin Son….in your 4 th season coaching the Aggies the reality is over the past 3 seasons in SEC Conference play you are sitting on an SEC record of…
11 – 13
….and if you don’t get that changed in a Helluva hurry…even with the HUGE and Totally Damn Idiotic buyout you have at Texas A&M….the Aggies will be looking for a new head football coach come December 2016 which brings us to this critical question:
How many games MUST Kevin Sumlin win in 2016 to be employed by the Aggies when Santa Claus gets in his sleigh in late December of this year?
UCLA Prairie View A&M At Auburn Arkansas (Dallas) At South Carolina Tennessee Bye Week At Alabama New Mexico State At Mississippi State Ole Miss Texas San Antonio LSU
OK….Bozo the Clown or actually ANY Damn Clown you can think of could win…
….coaching the Aggies in 2016 so let’s start with 3 Wins and work our way through what is a pretty tough schedule for an Aggie football team with a new offensive coordinator and new quarterback under center BUT even with all the uncertainty we see No Damn Reason at all that A&M doesn’t win at least…
8 Football Games in 2016
…and post a record in SEC play of at least…
4 – 4!
Memo to Kevin Sumlin: Son…if you post less than 9 wins overall and less than 5 wins in SEC play in 2016 we would recommend you have a mover on speed-deal BUT then even 9 wins might lead to your firing AND if you lose that opening game to UCLA at Kyle Field….Oh Geez….is there something hotter than your ass sitting on the face of the Sun which is around…
1.8 Million Degrees Fahrenheit?
Well, a supernova explosion is around 7.2 trillion degrees Fahrenheit and that is about what the temperature that Kevin Sumlin’s ass will be if the Texas A&M Fighting Aggies lose to the Very Damn Soft UCLA Bruins on September 3 in College Station!
Oh….it does feel Oh So Damn Good for the “Balboa Café Seven” to be back in control of Coaches Hot Seat!
Up next the #2 Head Coach on the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings…
Will Muschamp, South Carolina
Our friends in South Carolina tell us that Will Muschamp is blowing a Helluva lot of Sunshine up the folks in Columbia asses and that he has people believing the Gamecocks are going to be a tough team to beat in Year 1 of the Muschamp-era at USC….Hmmmmmmm….seems like we have heard this song before and we ain’t talking about Louis Armstrong singing It’s A Wonderful World….
….but rather we are thinking of FLORIDA and with that in mind it might just be Cock fans calling the Operator to find out how in the Hell they can get rid of Will Muschamp before the turkey is on the table in late November!
Meanwhile if there is a song that defines Will Muschamp it has to be….
…are we right?
Well…of course the Balboa Café Seven are right and with that blog post Coaches Hot Seat is back in business!
The College Football Regular Season Is Over Johnny Cash…..But There Is One New Head Football Coach At South Carolina That You Are Very Familiar With That Needs To Be Told the Unvarnished Truth! Give Will Muschamp Hell Mr. Cash!
There were only a couple of changes to the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings after Post Championship Week – End of the College Football Regular Season games over the weekend BUT last week when we started to hear last week that…
South Carolina might actually hire Will Muschamp
…we knew that there would be a new Number 1 Head Coach on the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings if indeed….
South Carolina AD Ray Tanner was STUPID enough to hire Will Muschamp
…and indeed Will Muschamp has been hired at South Carolina and now joins a list of…
The WORST Head Coaches Hires in Recent College Football History
Charlie Weis at Notre Dame Charlie Weis at Kansas Lane Kiffin at Tennessee Lane Kiffin at USC Mike Riley at Nebraska …among others (see below)
…and there is a REAL debate within Coaches Hot Seat that indeed…
Will Muschamp is the WORST hire in Modern Day College Football which we date from the…
1983 College Football Season FORWARD
…otherwise known here at Coaches Hot Seat as…
The Post Bear Bryant Era of College Football
To understand what a Completely STUPID hire that Will Muschamp is at South Carolina one must go inside Muschamp’s win/loss numbers at Florida just like we recently did with Les Miles at LSU which showed both why Les Miles was and remains on the Hot Seat today and the numbers for Miles at LSU show that…
Over the past 20 SEC Games that Les Miles has coached at LSU against SEC teams with .500 or better records Miles’ record is 10 – 10
….which at a place like LSU are CLEAR Firing Numbers unless of course you are someone that believes LSU Football should be AVERAGE!
Likewise….looking at Will Muschamp’s FOUR Years at Florida between 2011 – 2014 which everyone would agree is a Top 10 College Football Program at WORST the record reveals that Will Muschamp posted records of…
Overall: 28 – 21
SEC: 17 – 15
….which are AVERAGE AT BEST and by themselves should have precluded Will Muschamp from being hired at another SEC Conference school especially a school in the SEC East Division BUT when one goes inside the above numbers one will find nothing short of a…
Complete Freaking Disaster during Will Muschamp’s FOUR Years at Florida
…and a Complete Understanding of our opinion that…
South Carolina AD Ray Tanner is one of the Stupidest Damn Human Beings now alive on Planet Earth
The FACTS as Joe Friday used to say on Dragnet….
In the FOUR Years that Will Muschamp coached Florida his team played…
49 Total Football Games at Florida
…..and Muschamp coached….
45 Total Football Games Against FBS Teams
…and in those 45 Total Games Against FBS Teams Will Muschamp and Florida faced…
33 FBS Teams with .500 or better records in the year Florida played them
….and in those 33 games against FBS Teams with .500 or better records in the year that Florida played them Will Muschamp posted a win/loss record of…
11 – 22 (.333)
Even WORSE when one realizes that Will Muschamp has STUPIDLY been hired at an SEC school in South Carolina which is in the SEC East and will be facing Florida on a yearly basis in the FOUR Years that Will Muschamp was the head coach at Florida the Gators played….
22 SEC Teams with .500 or better records in the year Florida played them
….and against those 22 SEC Teams with .500 or better records in the year that Florida played them Will Muschamp posted a record of…
7 – 15 (.318)
Please…is there ANYONE with a working brain that can explain to us how South Carolina AD arrived at the point where he even CONSIDERED hiring Will Muschamp at South Carolina forget about hiring Muschamp?
We didn’t think ANYONE with a working brain could come up with a reason to justify why Will Muschamp was EVER on South Carolina’s potential new head coaches list EXCEPT that Ray Tanner may be such…
A Complete and Total Idiot
…that like former Tennessee AD Mike Hamilton Ray Tanner might have listened to a Complete Moron that lives in Memphis, Tennessee who is not qualified to Shovel Shit in our opinion and what is Mike Hamilton doing today after hiring Lane Kiffin and Derek Dooley?
We don’t have a clue but he was FIRED Years ago as the AD at Tennessee for making Complete and Totally Idiot decisions and with that mind…
Welcome to the Complete and Total Idiot Club Ray Tanner!
Even worse than the FACT that Will Muschamp posted…
.333 winning percentage against FBS teams with .500 or better records
.318 winning percentage against SEC teams with .500 or better records
…it’s out opinion here at Coaches Hot Seat that Will Muschamp is…
Unfit to be a college football coach on ANY level and especially a head football coach on the FBS level because very simply in our opinion…
Will Muschamp is an Out-of-Control Whack Job that we would not hire to Shovel Shit because we would be afraid that Muschamp would get mad and start hitting people on the head with his Shit Shovel!
We have a Helluva lot more we could write in this spot about Will Muschamp that we have picked-up from people at Florida and Auburn over the past few years but we are going to hold onto those things for a future date when we are confident they will come in handy when writing about Muschamp’s tenure at South Carolina.
One thing we can do is update our….
Worst Head Coaching Hires in the Post-Bear Bryant College Football History
….which we put out a few weeks and has now been updated to include Ray Tanner’s STUPID hiring of Will Muschamp at South Carolina:
1. Charlie Weis, Kansas
2. Will Muschamp, South Carolina
3. Charlie Weis, Notre Dame
4. Gerry Faust, Notre Dame
5. Bill Callahan, Nebraska
6. Lane Kiffin, Tennessee
7. Lane Kiffin, USC
8. Mike Riley, Nebraska
9. Mike Price, Alabama
10. Howard Schnellenberger, Oklahoma
11. Ron Zook, Florida
Damn….when you are even above the hiring of Charlie Weis at Notre Dame on the….
Worst Head Coaching Hires in the Post-Bear Bryant College Football History
…you have made a Helluva BAD Head Coaching hire and we are confident that Will Muschamp will prove us right by his win/loss record at South Carolina and even more importantly by his…
Outrageous and Over-the-Top Whack Job Behavior
…which in our opinion should have disqualified Muschamp from ANY coaching position in college football which was on dramatic display for ANYONE that was paying attention to see in the recent Iron Bowl between Alabama and Auburn.
Memo to South Carolina AD Ray Tanner: We believed you to be a Pompous Arrogant Ass a few years ago when you called Paul Finebaum and cried about Finebaum criticizing Jadeveon Clowney which Finebaum WRONGLY apologized for since Clowney was in our opinion and ANYONE else that was paying attention NOT playing hard in his last year at South Carolina BUT now that you have hired Will Muschamp in our opinion Ray….
You Are a Pompous Arrogant Ass that also is a Complete and Total Idiot!
….that has No Damn Business being an Athletic Director ANYWHERE in intercollegiate athletics….in our humble opinion.
Signed: Coaches Hot Seat
A couple of other notes before we leave the IDIOCY of Will Muschamp being hired at South Carolina we couldn’t help but laugh when we read over the last few days that…
Steve Spurrier supported the hiring of Will Muschamp at South Carolina
…and since we know that Steve Spurrier is one of the most competitive men now alive on Earth can anyone imagine why Spurrier would want Muschamp to follow him at South Carolina?
Think along the same reason why Spurrier left in midseason so he wouldn’t have that…
3 – 9 record that South Carolina posted in 2015 on his ledger
…and wasn’t that early resignation by Spurrier supposed to also be about giving Ray Tanner plenty of time to hire the next head coach at USC and who did Tanner end with after ALL that time?
Will Freaking Muschamp!
Yes….Steve Spurrier will be sitting back in the next few years watching South Carolina fully implode under Muschamp and be saying to anyone that will listen…
“See….only the Old Ball Coach could make the Gamecocks competitive!”
…..in our opinion at least as we laugh out loud at the Idiocy that “Spurrier supports the hiring of Will Muschamp at South Carolina!”
As for who we here at Coaches Hot Seat would have hired at South Carolina instead of Muschamp that would be ANY college coach in America since we would NEVER hire Will Muschamp at ANY position football-related or ANYTHIGN else but to get specific South Carolina was NUTS not to hire..
Dino Babers, was at Bowling Green now at Syracuse
Jeff Brohm, Western Kentucky
Scott Satterfield, Appalachian State
Matt Campbell, Toledo
Mike Leach, Washington State
Todd Monken, Southern Miss
Matt Rhule, Temple
Willie Taggart, South Florida
Tommy Tuberville, Cincinnati
Bob Diaco, Connecticut
Rod Carey, Northern Illinois
Willie Fritz, Georgia Southern
Craig Bohl, Wyoming
Bob Stitt, Montana
John Grass, Jacksonville State
Chris Klieman, North Dakota State
…just to name a few of the coaches we would have hired at South Carolina but then we here at Coaches Hot Seat are not…
Complete and Total Idiots on top of being Pompous Arrogant Asses
…as is South Carolina AD Ray Tanner….in our humble opinion of course.
Amazingly Week 3 of the college football season is already in the books and the HEAT is being turned-up on college head coaches who have stumbled out of the gate or in some cases NEVER got out of the gate and with that REALITY let’s get to the…
These head coaches don’t like to see the Man in Black but Give ‘em Hell anyway Johnny Cash!
1. Paul Rhoads, Iowa State – With the Iowa State loss to Toledo on Saturday considering this stat for a second….
In Paul Rhoads last 30 games at Iowa State he has posted a record of:
7 – 23
In Paul Rhoads last 25 Big 12 games at Iowa State he has posted a record of:
4 – 21
Yep, that will land your ass on the No. 1 Hot Seat in the land and after a 1 – 2 start to the 2015 season the Cyclones get a week off before playing Kansas at home on October 3.
Iowa State can beat this Kansas team in the wake of the Complete Freaking Disaster left by that Dumbass Charlie Weis…right?
We sure the Hell hope so but how will Iowa State fare in its other 8 Big 12 conference games after they beat Kansas on October 3?
Hell if we know, but it looks like barring a Miracle in Corn Country Iowa State will be looking for a new head football coach come December!
2. Doug Martin, New Mexico State – Doug Martin is in his third season at New Mexico State and with the Aggies overtime loss to UTEP on Saturday Martin has posted a record in three seasons at NMSU of….
4 – 23
Enough said on Doug Martin’s Hot Seat situation at New Mexico State!
3. Darrell Hazell, Purdue – We here at Coaches Hot Seat fully expected Darrell Hazell’s Boilermakers to beat Virginia Tech at home on Saturday but instead the Hokies delivered a 51 – 24 beatdown of Purdue and now the 2015 season could turn into a Complete Freaking Disaster for Hazell with a very good Bowling Green team coming to town this coming Saturday.
A loss to Bowling Green and Purdue will start the season at…
1 – 3
…with 8 Big Ten games left to be played starting with a game at Michigan State on October 3 and for the life of us we believe if you can’t beat Virginia Tech or Bowling Green how in the Hell will Purdue win another game this season!
Oh, Darrell Hazell’s win/loss records in his third season at Purdue:
Overall: 5 – 22
Big Ten: 1 – 15
That’s BAD with a capital B!
4. Mike London, Virginia – After a few tense moments Mike London’s Virginia football team got its first win of the season over William & Mary on Saturday and now it’s back to Big Boy football in Week 4 with a game on Friday night against Boise State.
Now in his SIXTH season at Virginia Mike London has win/loss records on the board of…
Overall: 24 – 40
ACC: 11 – 29
…with ONE winning season out of FIVE and if UVA is going to post a winning season in 2015 we would recommend that they beat Boise State on Friday night!
By comparison the Virginia head coach that Mike London replaced and who was run out of Charlottesville on a rail…
…coached at UVA for NINE seasons posting FIVE winning seasons.
Yep…that reality will land your ass on the Hot Seat 100% of the time!
5. Bret Bielema, Arkansas – A few years ago a handful of Coaches Hot Seat members were having dinner with one of their college physics professors and one asked the professor about the following Albert Einstein quote:
CHS Member: “John…what did Einstein mean when he said…
“Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.”
College Physics Professor: “Ahhh…Albert…a very smart one he was. There is a scientific answer to what Einstein meant when he said, “Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one,” but remembering you boys’ grades in my class I will give you the layman’s answer!
Loud laughter at the table!
College Physics Professor: “What Einstein meant was that reality is nothing more and nothing less than how each of our brains perceives the world and the perceived reality for one person is often very different than the reality for almost everyone else on the Earth and thus one reality is very hard to define. In the end reality is just the perception created by the neurons firing off in each of our brains which human beings will naturally try to order towards their own individual particular world view.”
CHS Member: “So what you are saying is that reality…meaning a one reality for everyone no more exists than the Man on the Moon and that reality is different for each person based upon how their individual brain perceives the world?”
College Physics Professor: “Precisely, but then human beings because of their highly evolved brains look at the world around them and naturally want to order it, to organize it, to classify it, to put people and ideas into certain boxes, because that is what homo sapiens were forced to do over millions of years of evolution to survive and then thrive and with that you now not only understand what Einstein was saying but you can also grasp why perception plays such a huge role in daily human life. In the end we are what we perceive of the world, of other people, and of ourselves.”
Getting back to the Complete Freaking Disaster that is Bret Bielema’s REALITY right now after the Razorbacks loss to Texas Tech on Saturday the PERCEPTION at the end of the 2014 season was that Arkansas made some HUGE strides….but did they in FACT?
Let’s go Joe Friday and get to the FACTS on the State of Arkansas Football…Past…Present…and Future:
After a loss to Georgia on October 18, 2014 the Arkansas record stood at…
3 – 4
….and then the Razorbacks under Bret Bielema finished the season by doing this:
Beating UAB = No Big Whoop!
Losing to Mississippi State = Not Surprising
Beating a Collapsing LSU Team = No Big Whoop!
Beating a Demoralized Ole Miss Team =No Big Whoop!
Losing to Missouri = Not Surprising
Beating a Mediocre Texas Team in Bowl Game = No Big Whoop!
So the so-called BIG ending to the Razorbacks 2014 was in REALITY…
No Big Whoop!
…but the PERCEPTION was that Bret Bielema had “turned things around” at Arkansas when in REALITY nothing could be farther from the truth!
Let’s move ahead to the 2015 season for Arkansas which has started this way following an off-season of Bret Bielema and Arkansas AD Jeff Long telling anyone that would listen that Bielema was the second-coming of Paul “Bear” Bryant and that Ohio State was actually playing in something akin to the MAC instead of the Big Ten….in our opinion of course….
Beat UTEP = No Big Whoop!
Lost to Toledo = Hmmmm….Surprising….but NOT REALLY!
Lost to Texas Tech = Hmmmm…Even More Surprising…but NOT REALLY!
Oh, Bret Bielema’s record since supposedly things “turned around” at Arkansas after the loss to Georgia last season:
5 – 4
So the PERCEPTION until Toledo whipped Arkansas was that the Razorbacks were….BACK.…but the REALITY which is just now sinking into the heads of Arkansas fans who are thinking the Pig Farmer from Iowa might have pulled a fast one on them in the last year is that…
Arkansas is 1 – 2 and they play Texas A&M on Saturday in Dallas and the Aggies are….
If Arkansas loses to Texas A&M on Saturday with games at Tennessee and at Alabama on deck the REALITY is the Razorbacks could be sitting at…
1 – 5
….when Auburn comes to Fayetteville on October 24 in what could be the….
Ultimate Hot Seat vs. Hot Seat Coaching Match-Up with the Losing Coach being run out of town on the back of a hog!
Here’s the REALITY for Bret Bielema based upon the building PERCEPTION in Arkansas which we confirmed by talking to an Arkansas-alum friend of ours in Ft. Smith, Arkansas who could buy-and-sell everyone in the Fayetteville – Bentonville area except for the Walton clan and that REALITY is…
“If this season implodes both Bielema and AD Jeff Long might find themselves lucky to shoveling shit in West Texas as you boys like to say from time to time!”
Yep…that is the REALITY NOW in Arkansas folks!
On another note per our agreement with Texas Tech head coach Kliff Kingsbury since the Red Raiders beat the Razorbacks we will no longer be calling Coach Kingsbury….
“_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _”
Nice win there in Fayetteville Kliff!
6. Willie Taggart, South Florida – With the South Florida loss to Maryland on Saturday the Bulls dropped to…
1 – 2
…on the season and things don’t get any easier for Willie Taggart and his football team with this upcoming schedule:
Memphis Syracuse At UConn SMU At Navy At East Carolina Temple Cincinnati At UCF
Memo to Willie Taggart:IF your South Florida team plays the rest of the season the way it has played its first three games in 2015…
You might not win another game until you play hapless UCF on November 26 and Hell Furman beat UCF so go ahead and put that win over the Black Knights on the board!
Get off your ass Willie Taggart! Signed: Coaches Hot Seat
7. Gus Malzahn, Auburn – At the tail-end of the 2014 college football season we ran into an “old and former defensive coordinator in the SEC” at a restaurant in Atlanta and he said to us when the Auburn football program came up:
“The Gus Malzahn experiment in major college football is about to come to an end because what he and other coaches like Chip Kelly have been doing just cannot work unless they have an elite quarterback and neither Malzahn nor Kelly have that right now nor more than likely will they have that next season.”
We talked about the above statement for a few hours in the lobby of an Atlanta hotel and came to agreement on the idea that Malzahn and Kelly’s offenses depended on an elite quarterback who could make instant decisions on the fly but Auburn had Jeremy Johnson ready to play in 2015 and the Eagles had Nick Foles who wasn’t doing to bad at quarterback for the Eagles last season.
Jeremy Johnson is a Total Bust and Nick Foles is playing for the St. Louis Rams who was replaced by Sam Bradford who would be lucky to be a water boy on the Coaches Hot Seat Flag Football Team forget about playing QB and right now the…
….are both a Complete Freaking Disaster!
Oh…another thing…neither the Philadelphia Eagles nor the Auburn Tigers are playing ANY defense so put that REALITY on top of everything else and truly….
Gus Malzahn is facing nothing short of what Gene Chizik faced in 2012 when Auburn went 3 – 9 and 0 – 8 in SEC play and was rightly run out of Auburn on a rail!
Let’s look at the rest of Auburn’s schedule with the Tigers now at 1 – 2 on the season realizing that…
Gus Malzahn is 2 – 6 in his last 8 games at Auburn
Guz Malzahn is 10 – 6 in his last 16 games at Auburn
Mississippi State San Jose State At Kentucky At Arkansas Ole Miss At Texas A&M Georgia Idaho Alabama
In our opinion if Auburn plays like they did against LSU the Tigers will be lucky to win…
3 Games in 2015
ANY SEC Games in 2015
What if Auburn finished at…
3 – 9 Overall
0 – 8 in the SEC
…in 2015 would Gus Malzahn be sent packing as Gene Chizik was sent packing only two seasons ago with the same record after winning a National Championship considering Malzahn didn’t win a National Title two seasons ago when he had the chance?
What’s Good for the Chizik is Good for the Malzahn….right?
Who would Auburn AD Jay Jacobs hire to replace the run out of Auburn Gus Malzahn to coach the Tigers into the future?
Well, based upon the amount of money Auburn has been spending to build a strong football program on The Plains does anyone doubt that Jacobs would fly down to Tallahassee and offer Jimbo Fisher $8 Million A Year…”Nick Saban Money”….to be the next head football coach at Auburn?
Would Jimbo Fisher accept an offer to become the Auburn head coach at $8 Million A Year?
Does it get HOT on The Plains of southwest Alabama in the Summer?
That would be a BIG YES!
Memo to Gus Malzahn: Nice try against LSU to get the Auburn offense going with Jeremy Johnson but now Gus….Johnson would be lucky to be running the scout team for the Coaches Hot Seat Flag Football Team forget about being in the 1 – 5 QB slots so why in the Hell is he the starting QB at Auburn? Oh, what’s behind Johnson is even worse? OK…that makes sense!
Memo No. 2 to Gus Malzahn: If you lose to Mississippi State on Saturday here is how you will know on whether to contact a Realtor or not to put your house on the market:
If Auburn AD Jay Jacobs starts saying things like…
“I am becoming very concerned in our fundamental approach to the game.”
…put the house on the market immediately!
8. Charlie Strong, Texas – The most amazing thing about the Texas loss to California on Saturday wasn’t the missed extra point at the end of the game BUT that the Texas Longhorns…
YES the Freaking Texas Longhorns!
…had to come storming back to almost tie a team in the California Bears that over the past THREE football seasons had won NINE football games TOTAL!
That is the REALITY of how far the Texas football program has fallen since Mack Brown lost to Alabama in the 2009 – 2010 Bogus BCS National Title Game!
Since that loss to Alabama in the Rose Bowl in Pasadena in January 2010 Texas has posted a combined record under Mack Brown and Charlie Strong of….
37 – 30!
This is the Texas Longhorns we are talking about here and although we will readily admit there is No Joy in Coaches Hot Seat-Ville putting Charlie Strong on the Hot Seat who two Coaches Hot Seat members first met in the early 1990s when Charlie was on Steve Spurrier’s staff at Florida the TRUTH is Texas football right now is very simply…
A Complete Freaking Disaster
…and the sad REALITY is that if Oliver Luck had been the AD at Texas in 2013 instead of the Sorry Excuse for a Human Being Steve Patterson that right now…in our opinion….the head coach of the Texas Longhorns would be none other than…
Guess what Texas fans….and this is just our opinion here at Coaches Hot Seat and is the FIRM opinion of the two Coaches Hot Seat members that traveled to Tuscaloosa for the Ole Miss – Alabama game on Saturday and who are still in Tuscaloosa on this early Monday morning…
If Texas is looking for a new head football coach in December Nick Saban would be Very Damn Interested in that job
….because unlike Alabama which is rebuilding job that is PAST DONE Texas is a Complete Freaking Disaster that needs a HERO to save it and again our opinion here at Coaches Hot Seat:
Nick Saban has ONE more Act in his life on this Earth which would be capped by winning….
National Titles at LSU, Alabama and Texas!
You heard it here first!
As for Charlie Strong whose Texas team is now at 1 – 2 on the season Big 12 Conference play begins this Saturday against Oklahoma State in Austin and to that we can only say…
Good Luck Charlie!
9. George O’Leary, UCF – The UCF loss to Furman on Saturday confirmed of what we saw of UCF when they played Stanford in Week 2…
UCF is average at best and hardly coached team at worst
….and we agree completely with the following from Victory Way: UCF Blog for the UCF Fans…
Up next for the 0 – 3 UCF which is now hardly coached by George O’Leary in our opinion…
At South Carolina
….in a Hot Seat vs. Hot Seat Head Coaching Match-Up against the Ole’ Ball Coach!
Speaking of the Ole’ Ball Coach!
10. Steve Spurrier, South Carolina – In the spring of this year a few Coaches Hot Seat members were up in South Carolina playing golf in the Greenville area and ran into some South Carolina Gamecock fans who were asked about the status of Steve Spurrier who will be FOREVER be known at Coaches Hot Seat as the…
Ole’ Ball Coach
…and one of those South Carolina fans said the following:
“I heard that Spurrier wanted to retire at the end of last season but that some folks got to him about all the other coaches that would be out of job if he retired and the Steve reluctantly decided to come back and coach in 2015 and see how things would turn out.”
Sorry….head coaches should not be staying in jobs to keep their assistant coaches and especially their sons employed and no matter what Steve Spurrier has done at South Carolina in the past in case the folks in South Carolina don’t know it the Gamecocks head coaching job is not something akin to the modern day Roman Empire or the USSR where the leaders get to hang around for as long as they want but instead South Carolina is in America and in America…
When you quit performing in your job…you get fired!
That’s how it is for most hard-working Americans making $50,000 or less a year and for Damn sure that is how it should be for football coaches making Millions of Dollars a year!
Steve Spurrier has no Damn “right” to stay as the head coach at South Carolina for as long as he wants but instead the people paying the bills….
The alums, boosters and fans of South Carolina
…will decide when Steve Spurrier will no longer be the head coach at USC unless of course the Ole’ Ball Coach decides first which based upon South Carolina’s remaining games in 2015 as detailed below will be the way this Shakespearean tragedy in Columbia will end later this year:
UCF At Missouri LSU Vanderbilt At Texas A&M At Tennessee Florida The Citadel Clemson
Anyone else thinking that the Ole’ Ball Coach and South Carolina will…
Win maybe….3 more games this season….before they play Clemson at home on November 28 in what will more than likely be the last game with the Ole’ Ball Coach on the sideline in his legendary playing and coaching career?
Anyone else thinking South Carolina will beat Clemson and send Steve Spurrier out a winner and that the next day Steve will be playing golf in Florida?
And all the men and women merely players; They have their exits and their entrances, And one man in his time plays many parts, His acts being seven ages. At first the infant, Mewling and puking in the nurse’s arms. Then, the whining school-boy with his satchel And shining morning face, creeping like snail Unwillingly to school. And then the lover, Sighing like furnace, with a woeful ballad Made to his mistress’ eyebrow. Then, a soldier, Full of strange oaths, and bearded like the pard, Jealous in honour, sudden, and quick in quarrel, Seeking the bubble reputation Even in the cannon’s mouth. And then, the justice, In fair round belly, with a good capon lined, With eyes severe, and beard of formal cut, Full of wise saws, and modern instances, And so he plays his part. The sixth age shifts Into the lean and slippered pantaloon, With spectacles on nose and pouch on side, His youthful hose, well saved, a world too wide For his shrunk shank, and his big manly voice, Turning again toward childish treble, pipes And whistles in his sound. Last scene of all, That ends this strange eventful history, Is second childishness and mere oblivion,
Sans teeth, sans eyes, sans taste, sans everything.”
Thank You Coach Spurrier…now have a Helluva Fun time in these last NINE football games Ole’ Ball Coach!
Post Week 3 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 11 – 30 Hot Seat Coaches Analysis coming soon!