Tag Archive: Tom Herman

COACHES HOT SEAT > Tom Herman

The Meltdown of College Football Programs Across America – Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

December 22, 2020

Well the 2020 College Football Regular Season is over and we moved into bowl season…such as it is….and with that we actually have a chance for a few Head Coaches on the Hot Seat to make things worse if they take losing teams to bowl games and lose and then we have some Coaches on the Hot Seat who along with their teams are…

Hiding Like Damn Cowards behind Corona Virus!

Save us the “kids have been thru so much” because we got 50+ folks Coaches Hot Seat did multiple 6+ month deployments on the oceans of the world in the US Navy including Operation Desert Storm in 1991 and guess what…

Their Asses Weren’t Crying About Having To Do That and Were Proud to Do it For America!

These Worthless Crying College Head Coaches who will NEVER do One Damn Thing For America in their lives on Earth that are now hiding because the last few months been “tough” need lesson on what “Tough” really is in life!

Give these Damn Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

Thank You!

Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

1. Jim Harbaugh, Michigan – It was no surprise to us that the Michigan Football program totally imploded going down the stretch and has now gotten out of games against…

Ohio State
Iowa
Bowl Game

…because these are Damn Cowards in Michigan…that’s right…

Shameful Damn Cowards!

You are a Damn Disgrace Jim Harbaugh and your Team is a Freaking Disgrace because what happened at Michigan in 2020 is the…

The Michigan Football Team Quit On and Off the Field and how Jim Harbaugh is still the Michigan Head Coach is a mystery to us but then if we AD at Michigan we grabbed Jimmy by the scruff of the neck and tossed his ass to the curb already because this meltdown of Michigan Football On and Off the Field is nothing short of a…

Total Damn Disgrace!

The FACTS are that since Michigan lost to Ohio State to end the 2018 season Jim Harbaugh’s records are…

Overall:  11 – 9

Big Ten:  8 – 7

…and if Michigan hadn’t run like Damn Cowards Jim Harbaugh would about to have THREE more losses to add to the above Total Disaster Records!

What A Damn Disgrace!

2.  Jeremy Pruitt, Tennessee – A few years back Derek Dooley was the Head Coach at Tennessee and was fired after 3 seasons on the job when he posted a record of…

15 – 21

…and now with the cancellation of the Tennessee bowl game…

And who is really surprised that Vols Football has Totally Melted Down just like Michigan did going down the stretch…we certainly were not!

….Jeremy Pruitt has 3 seasons on the job in Knoxville and his record is…

16 – 19

Please now…what in the Hell is the difference between those 2 records?

We will tell you in our humble opinion….Phil Fulmer hired Jeremy Pruitt from the 3 Finalists of…

Kevin Steele
Mel Tucker
Jeremy Pruitt

…NONE of which we EVER interviewed for the Tennessee job because we are NOT Total Stupid Shits like Fulmer and Phil is NEVER going to admit he was wrong about anything and would…

Burn Down Tennessee Football
Burn Down State of Tennessee
Burn Down American Republic

….before he admit he was wrong about anything….in our humble opinion!

Be Proud Fans of Tennessee Football..

You got a Raving Dumbass Egomaniac in the AD slot with a Pompous Arrogant Ass Punk who believes his Precious Ass is God On Earth as in the Head Coach slot….in our humble opinion!

Be Proud…Be Mighty Damn Proud!

3.  Clay Helton, USC – We thought maybe Clay Helton had actually done some Real Work this past offseason and the Trojans were no longer a Total Train Wreck like they been in recent years under Helton and we were thinking USC would roll a Very Average Oregon team at home in Pac-12 Championship Game which was coming off losses to Cal and Oregon State and yet….

USC in the Biggest Game of the Season playing against the ONLY team with a winning record it faced in 2020…

Did Not Show Up At All to Play for the Pac-12 Title!

How Clay Helton is still employed as the USC Head Coach this morning is beyond us because this is what the Trojans did in 2020….

Barely beat .500 Arizona State team
Barely beat Winless Arizona team
Struggled against Average Utah team
Beat Losing Record Washington State team
Beat Losing Record UCLA team

LOST to Only Damn Winning Record Team it played against in 2020…Oregon!

What a Damn Disaster but be Happy USC Fans….you will get more of this Horseshit in 2021!

4.  Tom Herman, Texas – As long-time Texas alum buddy of ours has said many times about Tom Herman >

“If your ass gonna be a Pompous Arrogant Ass Jerk your ass better Damn win big and Tom has been nothing but Average at Texas.”

Amen!

Tom Herman in 4 seasons at Texas has posted records of…

Overall:  31 – 18

Big 12:  22 – 13

…and that is Average As Hell and thus why Herman on the Hot Seat!

If we were the AD at Texas we would have fired Herman after the last game of the season and hired Coastal Carolina Head Coach Jamey Caldwell who be a Mighty Good Fit at Texas because he is a…

Winner Who Wins and Loses With Class and who can Interact with Fat Cat Boosters and Everyone Else!

5.  Jeff Brohm, Purdue – In 4 seasons at Purdue while making north of $20 Million Dollars Jeff Brohm has posted records of…

Overall:  19 – 25

Big Ten:  14 – 19

….and that is nothing short of a…

Total and Complete Disaster!

On top of the above Purdue was able to Weasel out of 2 games against Indiana in 2020 which is nothing short of a…

Total and Complete Disgrace!

Shameful….Just So Shameful!

6.  Scott Frost, Nebraska – There is probably no Non-Stanford Head Coach we want to see win more than Scott Frost because we love the kid but Frost in 3 seasons at Nebraska has posted records of..

Overall:  12 – 20

Big Ten:  9 – 17

Mike Riley in 3 seasons at Nebraska posted records of….

Overall:  19 – 19

Big Ten:  12 – 14

…and was Fired and Run Out of Lincoln on a Rail and yet Scott Frost survives with lot worse records?

That is NUTS but Frost’s record against FBS Teams with .500+ records now stands at…

5 – 17

…and that is nothing short of a…

Total and Complete Disaster!

We have no idea how Scott Frost is still the Head Coach at Nebraska but then we not going to EVER tolerate….

So far Below Mediocrity you cannot even see it!

7.  Mike Leach, Mississippi State – We never thought Mike Leach was a good fit for the Mississippi State job and thought Leach fit a lot better at Arkansas where you can get more of Leach-type players and so far the Leach Experiment in Starkville is sitting on a record of…

3 – 7

…which is a Total Disaster and looking ahead to 2021 Mississippi State’s Schedule looks like this with SEC dates not set yet >

Louisiana Tech
NC State
At Memphis
Tennessee Tech
At Arkansas
At Auburn
Alabama
Kentucky
LSU
Ole Miss
At Texas A&M
At Vanderbilt

Geez…that looks like 3 or 4 or maybe 5 wins tops again in 2021 and if it’s not a .500+ record next season that’s going to be a Helluva problem for Mike Leach a year from today!

8.  Justin Fuente, Virginia Tech – Our Expectations for Virginia Tech is that the Hokies will be in the running and challenging Clemson for the ACC Title Every Single Season especially in the 5 th year of a Head Coach in Blacksburg but instead of the Hokies getting better under Justin Fuente they seem to be getting Worse of just Treading Water and if we the AD at Virginia Tech we fired Fuente this year…but then…

Our Expectations for Virginia Tech a Helluva Lot Higher than Va. Tech AD Whit Babcock’s are and that is a…

Total Damn Disgrace!

There just is No Way in Hell Justin Fuente will make Virginia Tech competitive with Clemson anytime soon and Sorry….

That’s just Not Acceptable to Anyone who with a 2+ IQ!

9.  Dino Babers, Syracuse – We believe in Dino Babers ability to be a Winning Head Coach but as we have watched Syracuse play the last couple of seasons it’s almost as if his team is coming apart at the seams off the field and that’s something Dino needs to focus on and fix which brings to mind this quote by the Late Great Bill Walsh >

“The culture precedes positive results. It doesn’t get tacked on as an afterthought on your way to the victory stand. Champions behave like champions before they’re champions: they have a winning standard of performance before they are winners.”

You better Fix the Culture at Syracuse Dino and Fix It Quick Son!

10.  Dana Holgorsen, Houston – For a school in Houston that only just a few seasons ago was knocking on a Top 10 Ranking the last 2 years under Dana Holgorsen at Houston have been nothing short of a Complete and Total Disaster with Holgorsen now sitting on records of…

Overall:  7 – 12

AAC:  5 – 9

We talked to one our buddies down Houston way last week and he tells us…

“Holgorsen doesn’t win 8 games in 2021 his ass is done at Houston.”

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Gus Malzahn Fired At Auburn….Kevin Steele….Really? This Be Charlie Weis At Kansas Level Stupidity! – Post Regular Season Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny!

December 15, 2020

The firing of Gus Malzahn at Auburn proves again that at some colleges Slightly Above Average Football is not going to be accepted and we have believed for awhile now that Gus Malzahn was eventually going to be fired at Auburn because Gus was never going to make Auburn Football into the football power that Nick Saban has created at Alabama. Now, there are very few programs that can reach the heights that Alabama has reached under Saban, but Gus proved that Saban can be beat, 3 out of 8 tries by Gus even, and that if Auburn has the “Right” coach in place that could be .500+ wins against Alabama.

Reading some of the reports out of Alabama on Monday that Auburn Defensive Coordinator Kevin Steele was close to being a front-runner for the Auburn job were highly hilarious since there surely cannot be someone alive on the Planet Earth that believes…

You fire Gus Malzahn’s ass to hire Kevin Steele….come on now!

Who knows because there was someone Stupid Damn Enough to hire Charlie Weis at Kansas but you see…even as a bad of a hire that Charlie Weis was at Kansas Charlie had actually done something in his coaching career when Kevin Steele won 9 games at Baylor in 4 seasons as the Head Coach between 1999 – 2002!

Easily if Kevin Steele is hired as the Auburn Head Coach it will move into the #1 slot ahead of the Charlie Weis hiring at Kansas for…

The Worst Head Coaching Hire in College Football History

Don’t underestimate the Total Damn Stupidity of Trust Fund Boys who asses fell ass-backward into a Helluva Lot of Money and thus don’t be surprised if Kevin Steele is hired at Auburn!

Let’s bring out the Great Johnny Cash to give these Hot Seat Coaches Hell!

Thanks Johnny!

Post Regular Season Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

1.   Jim Harbaugh, Michigan – It doesn’t take Sigmund Freud to understand what has happened to Jim Harbaugh at Michigan because it’s obvious that the 2018 season when the Wolverines started 9 – 1 with only an opening season loss to Notre Dame and heading into Ohio State game where the Buckeyes whipped Blue by the score of 62 – 39 is driving the current malaise in Ann Arbor.

In our opinion Jim Harbaugh poured all he had into Michigan between 2015 and 2018 and even with all that work saw his team get destroyed by the Buckeyes and since that loss to Ohio State in 2018 Jim Harbaugh’s records are…

Overall:  11 – 9

Big Ten:  8 – 7

The current situation at Michigan has nothing to do with Jim Harbaugh’s “commitment” to the school but rather Jim just no longer has the Fire needed to drive the Michigan Football program forward because in his mind he now sees no matter how hard he works he is not going to get past Ohio State and that equals what is going on at Michigan right now…

The Michigan Football Program is bogged down and getting WORSE not BETER every Damn day that passes and Jim Harbaugh just does not have it in him to stop Michigan from spiraling down forget about bringing it back and right now we would rank Michigan Football…

Ohio State
Indiana
Northwestern
Iowa
Wisconsin
Penn State
Michigan State
Michigan
Minnesota
Rutgers
Maryland
Illinois
Nebraska
Purdue

….as the 8 th best Football Program in the Big Ten and that’s down a few spots since Jim Harbaugh took over Michigan in 2015 and who has been paid North of $30 Million Dollars and…

Michigan Football Has Gone Backwards!

We don’t have a Damn Clue what is ahead of Jim Harbaugh but as long as Jim is at Michigan in his current mental state we see nothing but a…

Total and Complete Disaster for Michigan Football in the coming years!

2.  Scott Frost, Nebraska – It took Mike Riley 38 games at Nebraska before he lost his 19 th game but Scott Frost now has…

20 Losses on the Board

…only coaching in 31 games after a loss to a Minnesota team that was down 30 player at home in Lincoln last Saturday and we only see things getting worse with the Huskers set to play Rutgers this coming Friday afternoon.

If Frost loses to Rutgers on Friday he will have on the Damn Impossible in our minds…

Lose 21 games in 3 seasons as the Head Coach at Nebraska!

How can one possibly lose an average of 7 games a season for 3 seasons in Lincoln and keep your job when just a few years ago then Nebraska AD Tom Osborne said when firing Bill Callahan from the head coaching job at Nebraska that…

“A 7 – 5 record is not acceptable at Nebraska.”

Chalk it up to the Pure Damn Arrogance and Hubris of Nebraska AD Bill Moos who will in our opinion…

Burn Down Nebraska Football
Burn Down Nebraska Athletics
Burn Down Entire State of Nebraska

…before Bill EVER admits he was wrong about ANYTHING!

Reality is Scott Frost can continue on Totally Damn Failing as the Head Coach at Nebraska and he will NEVER be fired until you fire Bill Moos first and to that we can only say for anyone that would defend that Absolute Nonsense…

Your ass should be in a Mental Institution!

3.  Jeremy Pruitt, Tennessee – We NEVER give credit when Tennessee beats Vanderbilt in football to the Vols Head Coach since Tennessee should always have 10x talent than Vandy and this year’s Vandy team could be whipped by most Powder Puff Teams in America so….

No Credit for a Vols Win over Vandy in 2020 either!

In 3 seasons at Tennessee Jeremy Pruitt is now sitting on records of…

Overall:  16 – 18

SEC:  9 – 15

…and his record against FBS teams with .500+ records is still at…

7 – 14

….or .333% after beating Vandy which of course…hasn’t won a Damn Football Game in 2020!

In the Summer of 2018 about a dozen of us here at Coaches Hot Seat took 7 RVs from San Francisco to Boston via the Southern United States on a 10 week trip and we spent 5 days parked near Dollywood around Gatlinburg, Tennessee where we met up with about a dozen Tennessee Vols fans at dinner one night we met over the years and asked then what they expected out of Jeremy Pruitt and to a person they all said then….

“We expect Tennessee to by playing for SEC Title by the 2020 season.”

Well…the 2020 season has come and gone and Jeremy Pruitt is sitting on a 3 – 6 record with wins over….

South Carolina = Fired Its Head Coach
Missouri = 1 st Year Head Coach in 2 nd Game
Vanderbilt = Fired Its Head Coach

Anyone else got that Tennessee hasn’t beat ANYONE in 2020 which brings us back to right now so we in the past week reached out to the Tennessee Vols fans we met up with outside Dollywood over dinner one night what they think of Jeremy Pruitt now and where Tennessee Football is going in the future and one fellow summed up the general sentiment of that group best >

“We are no better today than we were 3 years ago when Pruitt got here and we may be worse.”

Just our humble opinion looking at Tennessee Football from Butch Jones last season to today we would say….

Vols Football today is right where it was when Butch Jones was fired….

Average As Hell!

If you love Average As Hell then you no doubt love to see Tennessee Football keep Jeremy Pruitt around for as long as possible….we certainly know a lot of SEC fans of other SEC schools who hoping Tennessee does just that because the last thing the SEC needs is a Tennessee Football program that is actually doing something!

4.  Tom Herman, Texas – We have seen some Stupid Shit coaching searches over the years but Texas AD Chris Del Conte public wooing of Urban Meyer for Texas job with multiple people in Texas Athletic Department leaking things to folks in Texas media about the potential for Meyer to be the next Head Coach of Longhorns may be the Biggest Stupid Shit Coaching or Non-Coaching Search we seen in 50+ years on Earth!

If your ass thinks that Tom Herman needs to be replaced and you talk to someone like an Urban Meyer and it becomes widely known in the media….as it did…then your ass cannot then suddenly turn around when Meyer isn’t interested and keep Tom Herman in the job because you made it clear….

Tom Herman needs to be fired!

Now we happen to think that Tom Herman should be fired at Texas because he’s Average Coach who is also a Pompous Arrogant Ass Punk…in our humble opinion…and we can think of a dozen coaches-plus who would do a terrific job at Texas and be able to light a fire under the Texas fans, alums, and boosters which is evidently above Del Conte’s paygrade or ability but then we talking about a guy here who…

Pushed his Head Football Coach out on a limb and started sawing the limb off and then says….Forget This Ever Happened Yall!

Got Stupid Shit on a Massive Scale?

That’s what you got at the University of Texas right now with a Lame Duck Coach that the Stupid Shit AD will replace IF he can find the right coach to do it but until he does…

“Tom Herman is our coach!”

Where in the Hell do they find all these Stupid Shits to take these Athletic Director positions at US Colleges?

Is there some kind of Stupid Shit School turning out all these Damn Idiots or do folks just hang around for long periods of time in Collegiate Athletics where it’s almost impossible to get your ass fired and…

Stupid Shits Rise Up to the Top?

We are thinking the Latter but we will not rule out an Athletic Director Stupid Shit School being out there somewhere in America unleashing these Damn Morons on Colleges in our country!

5.  Jeff Brohm, Purdue – Jeff Brohm has now made in 4 seasons at Purdue north of….

$18 Million Dollars

…and has posted records of…

Overall:  19 – 25

Big Ten:  14 – 19

…so about a Million Bucks A Win for the fans of the Boilermakers and after 4 years on the job we have Purdue at….

Ohio State
Indiana
Northwestern
Iowa
Wisconsin
Penn State
Michigan State
Michigan
Minnesota
Rutgers
Maryland
Illinois
Nebraska
Purdue

….the very worst team in the Big Ten which has got to make the fans of Purdue Football mighty Damn proud!

The 2 – 4 Boilermakers have a game left at Indiana this coming Friday and if the game is played that no doubt will be another loss and that will be….

26 Losses in 4 Seasons = 6.5 Losses A Season

….but look on the bright side Purdue fans…at least it’s not the…

7 Losses A Season that Scott Frost is gonna be sitting on if the Huskers lose to Rutgers on Friday!

6.  Mike Leach, Mississippi State – In 2 seasons at Mississippi State Joe Moorhead posted records of…

2018:  8 – 5
2019:  6 – 7

…and got run out of Starkville and Mike Leach is now sitting on a record of…

2 – 7

…in his first year on the job with a game left against Missouri on Saturday and one has to wonder….

Is Mike Leach gonna get the Joe Moorhead treatment in Starkville and get his ass run out of town or is Mike OK because his ass got off the plane when he got the MSU job ringing a cowbell?

Most interesting is that “Offensive Genius” Mike Leach was hired at Mississippi State because his team were going to score a Helluva Lot of Points and yet in 2020 the Bulldogs are now ranked…

#118 out of 127 schools in Offensive Scoring in 2020

….scoring an average of…wait for it…

17.3 Points Per Game!

Freaking Hilarious!

Let’s take a look at where we would rank Mississippi State in the SEC after one year under Mike Leach >

Alabama
Florida
Georgia
Texas A&M
Auburn
Ole Miss
LSU
Kentucky
Missouri
Arkansas
Tennessee
South Carolina
Mississippi Sate
Vanderbilt

Only ahead of Vanderbilt!

Freaking Hilarious!

7.  Justin Fuente, Virginia Tech – We know what Virginia Tech Football Could and Should Be and the last 3 seasons Justin Fuente has posted record as the Head Coach of the Hokies of…

Overall:  19 – 18

ACC:  14 – 12

…and that ain’t what Virginia Tech Football Should Be!

Word out of Blacksburg yesterday is that Virginia Tech is going to keep Justin Fuente around for another season and that’s not something we would do if we AD at Tech but it sure is something that college football fans of opposing schools across the ACC are…

Loving Every Damn Minute Of!

8.  Dino Babers, Syracuse – It’s hard to know what has gone wrong at Syracuse for Dino Babers since that 10 – 3 season in 2018 but the last 2 years it looks like the Orange are coming apart at the seams on and off the field as Dino has posted records in 2019 + 2020 of…

Overall:  6 – 17

ACC:  3 – 15

We believe in Dino Babers ability to Coach Football and the problem at Syracuse is the mindset of the Individual Player and the Orange Football Team overall and that is something that Dino Babers better get fixed and in a Helluva Hurry before 2021 Spring Practice begins which is only a few months away!

9.  Les Miles, Kansas – In 2 seasons at Kansas Les Miles has posted records of…

Overall:  3 – 17

Big 12:  1 – 15

…and in 2021 Kansas is slated to play….

South Dakota
At Coastal Carolina
At Duke
At Iowa State
Baylor
Kansas State
Oklahoma
Texas Tech
West Virginia
At Oklahoma State
At TCU
At Texas

That looks like at best 2 wins for Kansas in Les Miles 3 rd season on the job and again….

Why was Les Miles hired at Kansas?

10.  Dana Holgorsen, Houston – When Dana Holgorsen was hired the President of the University of Houston said that…

“If you don’t win 10 games a season you get fired.”

….and in 2 seasons at Houston Dana Holgorsen has posted records of…

Overall:  7 – 12

AAC:  5 – 9

Even worse Dana Holgorsen’s record against FBS Teams with .500+ records he is…

1 – 12

Translation = 6 of 7 of Dana Holgorsen’s wins are against Sub-.500% teams which is nothing short of a…

Total Freaking Disaster for Houston Football!

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No One Will Believe What Happened in 2020 In 10 Years! – Whatever the Hell It is Week Coaches Hot Seat Rankings! – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

December 7, 2020

In the 50+ years that the 7 people that founded Coaches Hot Seat in the Fall of 2006 been on Earth we cannot recall anything like what has happened in 2020, and even as we are more connected than ever on the Internet it’s our opinion the American People today collectively know less, read less, ask questions less, and ponder big questions less than anytime in American history. We have no idea what’s coming in the next 25 years, but if we are around to see it we are confident people will not believe what we will tell them about what happened in….2020!

One of the things no one will believe in 10 years is that so much time was spent testing College Age Kids for Corona Virus when it has a Fatality Rate lower than the Seasonal Flu for those under 30, but especially that lots of college football games have been cancelled and moved around for Positive Corona Virus Tests that if it was the Flu would mean nothing at all. Corona Virus primarily kills people over the age of 65 and America instead of Protecting Older Americans + Those Pre-Existing Conditions until a Corona Virus Vaccine was available the US + State + Local Governments have taken a Sledgehammer to the entire American Society and if they just done the former there be 200,000+ less dead Americans today.

Indeed, We Are Damn Morons and that will come be well-known in future years once everyone understands what Was and Wasn’t Done to stop a Corona Virus that can be stopped with a combination of Protecting the Vulnerable and a Few Simple Health Rules for the rest. Yes….We Are Damn Morons!

On to College Football in Whatever the Hell Week we just wrapped up it was another fascinating week of football that did have some impact on the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings including launching Louisville Head Coach Scott Satterfield onto the Hot Seat for taking an interview with South Carolina when Scott should have known doing such things at a place like Louisville is Very Damn Stupid Indeed! 3 – 7 Louisville hosts Wake Forest this coming Saturday and we would recommend Scott Satterfield win that game or he may just find his ass launched onto a Hot Seat that could end his Head Coaching career and all for what…

So your ass could turn down a job that went to a Tight-Ends Coach?

Very Dumb Scott Satterfield….Very Damn Dumb Son!

Speaking of Dumb when Will Muschamp was hired as the South Carolina Head Coach by AD Ray Tanner 5 years ago we wrote in this Coaches Hot Seat Blog why in the Hell someone would hire a coach that got his ass fired a Florida where it’s almost impossible to get your ass fired since Captain Kangaroo would win 8 games a year at Florida?

5 Years Later Will Muschamp is now gone leaving behind records of..

Overall:  28 – 30

SEC:  17 – 22

…which was as predictable as the Sun coming up in the East but as Batshit Crazy as the hiring of Will Muschamp was the hiring of Shane Beamer who at 43 years of ago has NEVER even held a Coordinator Position on Any Level of Football is a Total Damn Lunacy not of this Earth or of Any Known Planet in the Universe!

In 2019 we were talking to a College Football Coach about Shane Beamer and asked him why Beamer had not gotten a Coordinator Position and his response was >

“He will never get a Coordinator Position, but I would bet he will get a Head Coaching Job because of his last name and only because of his last name.”

We happen to agree and if you change Shane Beamer’s last name to Smith there’s not a Chance In Hell he would have even gotten an interview for the South Carolina Head Coaching Job since there are at least 500 Coaches in College Football more accomplished than Smith….make that Beamer!

Shane Beamer spent 4 years at South Carolina and he’s a Bright Kid…but what in the Hell does that have to do with South Carolina hiring…

The Very Best Damn Coach it Can = A Winner That Has Proven He Can Win on the FBS Level as A Head Coach!

South Carolina just hired a Tight-Ends Coach from Oklahoma because his last name is Beamer and in our opinion…..

Ray Tanner should be fired today but he won’t be because Ray Tanner could Totally Destroy South Carolina Football and Burn Down the University of South Carolina and Stupid Shits in South Carolina be lined-up for miles in Columbia to tell you about how great Ray Tanner is….in our humble opinion!

Please…this Shane Beamer hiring is Total Damn Lunacy after the Batshit Crazy hiring of Will Muschamp and in a Sane World Ray Tanner would be in an Insane Asylum….in our humble opinion!

On to the Whatever the Hell It is Week Coaches Hot Seat Rankings!

Mr. Johnny Cash could you please give these Hot Seat Coaches Hell?

Thank You Johnny!

Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

1.  Jim Harbaugh, Michigan – Jim Harbaugh is the same age as many folks at Coaches Hot Seat so we grew up watching Jim, playing College Football the same time as Jim, knowing Jim’s Father Jack Harbaugh, and generally we were very supportive of Jim getting the Stanford job in 2006 and we pushed as much as we could for Stanford to hire Jim over the other finalist who will remain nameless in this blog.

People you give a Damn about you will give the hardest time when they are slacking off and it’s our opinion since Ohio State boat-raced Michigan at the end of the 2018 season the Michigan Football Team has been on a continuous spiral downwards with Little to No Damn Leadership from Jim Harbaugh which led to these records since that OSU game >

Overall:  11 – 9

Big Ten:  8 – 7

We know some folks in Ann Arbor and have a suspicion on what is going on with Jim Harbaugh and why he has lost a lot of his fire the last couple of seasons which has led to a…

Dramatic Decline in Michigan Defensive Play

A Michigan Offense That Has No Rhyme, No Reason, No Heart, No Style, Hell…It Has Nothing At All!

Jim Harbaugh drove Stanford Football, the San Francisco 49rs, and even Michigan Football until the 2018 season like Vince Lombardi drove the Green Bay Packers, but that Jim Harbaugh is gone and it’s our opinion if Jim is not going to give his all to Michigan then he should go find something else to do whether it’s coaching in the NFL or something else…

Just go find something you have a Passion for Jim because Michigan Football right now is a…

Damn Embarrassment!

A buddy ours who works for an NFL team asked us recently…

“Would we hire Jim Harbaugh right now to coach an NFL team?”

Our response was….

“We would have to talk to Jim in person before we could answer that question because something’s wrong with Jim now and maybe a change of scenery would give Jim new energy…or maybe it wouldn’t. For Damn Sure though we would know after talking to Jim for 10 minutes if we would hire him or not and anyone that knows how to interview people the right way would know it too.”

2 – 4 Michigan has Ohio State left on their schedule and the Buckeyes have been established as 30-point favorites in what would be Jim Harbaugh’s….

72 nd game at Michigan

Sorry but if your ass is the Head Football Coach at Michigan and you are 30 point underdogs to Ohio State in your 6 th season on the job…

Your Ass Should Be Fired!

And Bo Schembechler if alive and Michigan AD would have already fired Jim Harbaugh’s ass….in our humble opinion!

2.  Kevin Sumlin, Arizona – We are confident that Kevin Sumlin never saw coming where he is now in his Head Coaching Career and what a great lesson Sumlin is if you don’t care about money and no Real Football Coach cares about money because they are too worried about Winning Football Games.

After Kevin Sumlin got fired at Texas A&M and got a Shit-Load-Ton Potful of Money on the way out the door he should have taken a year or 2 off from coaching but for some reason Arizona came calling to hire a coach who just got fired at Texas A&M which is a Helluva Lot Easier Place to Win Football Games than Arizona!

Why Arizona ever considered Kevin Sumlin for their head coaching job or why Sumlin took the job is a mystery to us but 3 seasons in Sumlin is sitting on records of..

Overall:  9 – 19

Pac-12:  6 – 16

…which is nothing less than a Total and Complete Disaster!

0 – 4 Arizona hosts 0 – 2 Arizona Sate this coming Friday in what can only be described as…

A Total Disaster in Tucson!

3.  Jeremy Pruitt, Tennessee – Tennessee playing a Freshman Quarterback #15 against Florida seemed to keep things pretty simple on Offense to try and get the kid some experience and the Sophomore QB #12 that came in looked even better with him being able to handle some more aggressive plays but really now…

In your 33 rd game as the Head Coach at Tennessee you are not competitive at all against Florida….at home in Neyland Stadium?

Jeremy Pruitt’s records are bad enough…

Overall:  15 – 18

SEC:  9 – 15

…but even worse is Pruitt’s record against FBS Teams with .500+ records…

7 – 14

Really….at the University of Tennessee you have a 33% winning percentage against FBS Teams with .500+ records?

Phil Fulmer can do whatever he wants with Jeremy Pruitt job status as long as he’s the AD at Tennessee but there’s Not A Chance In Hell if we had taken over the Vols AD job 3 years ago we interviewed any of the 3 Candidates that Fulmer had as his finalists…

Mel Tucker
Kevin Steele
Jeremy Pruitt

Really….that’s the best Tennessee Football can do?

Sorry but that’s Damn Pitiful and the now 2 – 6 Vols have left in 2020…

At Vanderbilt
Texas A&M

…and if Tennessee loses to Vanderbilt this coming Saturday we have been told by our friends in Knoxville that there’s better than a 50 – 50 chance that both Phil Fulmer and Jeremy Pruitt will be fired before the Texas A&M game and Tennessee will go after Hugh Freeze as their next Head Coach….before Auburn does it as well!

4.  Justin Fuente, Virginia Tech – A Virginia Tech alum buddy of ours that works on Wall Street called on Sunday and says….

“In the last 3 seasons Fuente’s records are 18 – 18 overall and 13 – 12 in ACC play and for the life of me I cannot imagine Fuente coaching the Hokies in 2021.”

With the 4 – 6 Hokies only having Virginia at home left on the schedule we cannot imagine it either!

5.  Tom Herman, Texas – With that 69 – 31 win over Kansas State to move to 6 – 3 on the season and only Pitiful Kansas left Tom Herman will have a 7 – 3 record on the board in 2020 which would leave Herman’s records in 4 seasons at Texas at….

Overall:  32 – 18  .644

Big 12:  22 – 14  .611

If the above records are acceptable to the folks at Texas fine, but they sure the Hell NOT would be acceptable to us nor our Texas-alum buddies who we missed fishing with in South Texas this Summer because of this Damn Corona Virus!

With Urban Meyer reportedly turning down the Texas job that leaves the folks in Austin in an interesting spot with an open engagement with Urban Meyer on the table and no other obvious coach out there that would get Texas Fans and Big Boosters excited.

Now if we were the Athletic Director at Texas understanding the Critical Role that the Head Football Coach at Texas plays in not only winning football games but raising money, talking-up boosters, engaging with fans, and generally being someone who isn’t a Total Damn Ass like Tom Herman who believes his Ass was put on Earth for everyone else to kiss…in our humble opinion….we would fire Tom Herman and hire Any Random Person off the streets of Austin and be assured it be a step-up just on the Human Being scale and yet who should Texas hire to replace Herman then?

Well…if Urban Meyer is out below are the Coaches we would talk to in order to see if they were interested in the Texas Head Coaching Job >

Brian Kelly
Dan Mullen
Matt Campbell
Mario Cristobal
Jamey Chadwell
Luke Fickell
Bryan Harsin

One of the above Coaches would take the Texas job…in our humble opinion and ALL be better than Tom Herman!

6.  Jeff Brohm, Purdue – Someone that is making $5M+ Dollars shouldn’t be posting records that look like this at Purdue or anywhere else…

2017:  7 – 6
2018:  6 – 7
2019:  4 – 8
2020:  2 – 4

That 2 – 4 Purdue team has a game left at Indiana so that’s 2 – 5 more than likely in Jeff Brohm’s 4 th year at Purdue and a team that in Brohm’s 44 th game just flat-out…

Got Its Ass Whipped by Nebraska Team that had only 2 Wins coming into the game!

Please…can someone tell us what Jeff Brohm is doing because in our opinion you could fire the Entire Damn Purdue Coaching Staff today and just roll the footballs out onto the practice field and the Boilermakers play a Lot Better and a Helluva Lot Harder!

7.  Scott Frost, Nebraska – Scott Frost has now entered the “Mike Shula” era of his career where if Frost can just get his ass dressed in the morning and get his ass into work and beat Pitiful Damn Teams like Penn State and Purdue it’s a…

Huge Victory!

Famously many Alabama Football Fans were Fighting Like Dogs to keep Mike Shula as the Head Coach at Alabama when after 4 seasons on the job Shula had posted a record of…

26 – 23

..and it is our humble opinion that Scott Frost could Burn Down the Nebraska Football Program and Entire State of Nebraska and a majority of Nebraska Football fans would be cheering him on hoping he could burn down something else!

In the Real World this is called Mass Delusional and it’s a real problem at Nebraska now where people are able to justify Scott Frost sitting on a record of…..

11 – 19

…after 3 years on the job and if the Huskers beat Minnesota to end the season that be..

12 – 19

…and here are the records of the 2 Previous Head Coaches at Nebraska after 3 seasons on the job…

Bill Callahan:  22 – 15

Mike Riley:  19 – 19

As we said….Mass Delusion + Lots of Stupid Shit!

Today most fans of Alabama Football will readily admit that accepting the Mike Shula Years at Alabama was a form of Total Damn Lunacy and eventually if Scott Frost continues on his current trend it will be seen as Total Damn Lunacy as well.

8.  Dino Babers, Syracuse – With the loss to Notre Dame on Saturday the Orange finished at 1 – 10 in 2020 and Dino Babers records after 5 seasons on the job now stand at…

Overall:  24 – 36

SEC:  13 – 29

…with only ONE Winning Season on the board and if that’s OK for the folks that run and cheer for Syracuse Football then Fine and Dandy and immediately turn in your American Citizen Cards because your ass should be living in a Communist Country that is willing to accept Total Mediocrity!

9.  Les Miles, Kansas – With only Texas left on the schedule for 0 – 9 Kansas Les Miles is headed for a Winless Record in his 2nd Season on the job which has left Miles’ records at…

Overall:  3 – 17

Big 12:  1 – 15

Please…Someone…Anyone…can you tell us why Les Miles was hired at Kansas?

Looking for some Damn Moron to speak-up and we don’t even see or hear that!

10.  Gus Malzahn, Auburn – If Gus Malzahn is succeeding at Auburn then Auburn Fans must be willing to accept 4+ Losses A Season for…wait for it…

7 Straight Seasons Now

….which is what you got with Gus Malzahn and that would be FIVE losses in 2020 if the SEC Conference actually employed Refs that knew their ass from the side of a barn…the Bogus Arkansas Game ending of course!

What it really comes down to Auburn is…

Are you willing to accept Total Damn Mediocrity?

If you are….GREAT….then keep Gus Malzahn but understand that you…meaning Auburn….

Is Totally Damn Mediocre….and You Love It!

Embrace that Truth and Love It!

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Whatever This Week Is Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – Corona Virus Out-Of-Control Because….So Many Damn Morons – Let’s Bring Out the Great Johnny Cash to Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell!

November 30, 2020

There is no way back in the Summer that we could have predicted that so much of America would be unable to follow Simple Rules to stop the spread of a Virus which are Simple Rules we have followed for years during Flu Season which basically is…

Wash Hands Lots
Limit Time Inside Public Buildings

…which has only added…

Wear Masks Inside Public Buildings

…in 2020 to stop the spread of Corona Virus and yet here we are heading towards Christmas.

America has 100,000+ more deaths from Corona Virus than any other country on Earth and deservedly so because when your ass cannot follow even Very Simple Rules then you gonna have a Helluva Mess on your hands and that is where America is right now.

Come on folks!

Let’s bring out the Great Johnny Cash to give these Hot Seat Coaches Hell!

Thanks Johnny!

Whatever This Week Is Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

1.  Jim Harbaugh, Michigan – We haven’t a Damn Clue what is going on with Michigan Football, but that performance by Michigan on Saturday against a winless Penn State team was easily….

The Worst Performance by a Michigan Football Team in our 50+ Years on Earth!

We also haven’t a Damn Clue what Jim Harbaugh is trying to do with the Michigan Offense but what the Wolverines are now running on Offense is…

Total Crapola….no make that Total Damn Stupid Shit Total Crapola!

It has gotten so bad at Michigan that Jim Harbaugh now…

Poses a Clear and Present Danger to the Safety and Well-Being to Michigan Football Players

….in our opinion because Jim Harbaugh is no longer coaching football at Michigan and you could just roll the footballs onto the practice fields at Michigan and the Wolverines players would not only field a better team they would actually be…

Safer on Gameday because they would actually be Practicing Football!

Michigan is now 2 – 4 in 2020 and they have beaten…

Awful Minnesota
Pitiful Penn State

…and needed 3 Overtimes to beat a Rutgers team that was one the worst college football teams in America the last 5 years coming into the 2020 season!

If we were the Athletic Director at Michigan we would have already fired Jim Harbaugh because he does in our opinion…

Poses a Clear and Present Danger to the Safety and Well-Being to Michigan Football Players

….because this is Not Football being played at Michigan, Hell it’s not even Patty-Cake…YES Michigan Football is now playing…

Sub-Patty-Cake Football

…and Every Damn Powder Puff Team we have seen play football in our 50+ years on Earth could…

Whip the Living Hell out of this Michigan Football Team!

Memo to Michigan AD Ward Manuel: If you care about the Safety and Well-Being of the Michigan Football Players fire Jim Harbaugh today!

2 – 4 Michigan has left….

Maryland
At Ohio State

…and it’s certainly possible Michigan will find a way to weasel out of an Total Ass Whipping in Columbus but can Blue even beat Maryland at home?

They couldn’t beat a Winless Penn State Team that just got whipped by Nebraska which is…

One of the worse Power 5 Conference Football Teams in America!

2.  Tom Herman, Texas – It goes without saying when you get Tom Herman as your Head Football Coach you know going in you are hiring…

One of the Most Pompous Arrogant Ass Human Beings on the Earth who believes his Ass is God on Earth and Every Other Human Being is a Worthless Piece of Shit

…in our humble opinion but one would think Herman thinking his ass is God on Earth would at least…

Win A Helluva Lot of Football Games and Championships

…and yet Herman’s records at Texas where Bozo the Clown could win .675 of their games is now…

Overall:  30 – 18 (.625)

Big 12:  21 – 13

5 – 3 Texas has left in 2020…

At Kansas State
At Kansas

…and Every Damn Powder Puff Team in America could whip the Hell out of Kansas so we will see what Texas does against Kansas State but we are talking about Texas here and in Year 4 you would think that…

God Almighty Himself = Tom Herman

…would as the Head Coach at TEXAS be able to beat Kansas State….Right?

Right!

Someone in Austin needs to fire God Almighty and after you fire his Worthless Damn Ass kick his Worthless Damn Ass off the University of Texas campus and then hold a press conference saying…

Only a Total Stupid Shit would hire Tom Herman….unless you want a Worthless Ass Pompous Arrogant Punk as your Head Coach….in our humble opinion.

3.  Kevin Sumlin, Arizona – Kevin Sumlin’s records at Arizona say it all…

Overall:  9 – 18

Pac-12:  6 – 15

….but consider Sumlin’s record against FBS Teams with .500+ records now stands at…

2 – 17

…and you have a full understanding at how bad things have gotten at Arizona which has now lost…wait for it…
10 Straight Football Games!

0 – 3 Arizona now has left in 2020…..

Colorado
Arizona State

…which looks like 2 more less and that would be 12 Straight Losses for Arizona heading into the 2021 season with or without Kevin Sumlin and the next time an Athletic Director thinks about hiring a coach that just….

Got His Ass Fired at a place like Texas A&M where Captain Kangaroo can win 8 games a season and got a Massive $$$ Buyout….Don’t Do It….

Just Don’t Damn Do It you Damn Moron AD and there are Lots of Damn Moron ADs in America today!

4.  Scott Frost, Nebraska – One would think by Scott Frost’s 29 th game as the Head Coach at Nebraska that the Huskers be able to beat Iowa but an even better question that we be asking of Frost after his football team lost 26 – 20 to Iowa on the road is…

“How in the Hell Son can you play Iowa to a tough game until the end on the road and the week before you get your ass whipped by a very mediocre Illinois team at home? Please explain that to me Son!”

With that loss Scott Frost, who is making $5M Dollars A Year and should be for that kind of money be able to field a football team that actually shows up in home games in Lincoln, records now stand at…

Overall:  10 – 19

Big Ten:  7 – 16

Really?

For almost $15M Dollars in the bank now for Scott Frost and he has put up those records?

Try Scott Frost has not EARNED $10 Damn Dollars because Nebraska could have hired…

Any Damn Moron off the streets of Omaha 3 years ago and paid him $10 Damn Dollars and His or Her Ass could have posted records of…

Overall:  10 – 19

Big Ten:  7 – 16

The 1 – 4 Huskers now have left in 2020…

At Purdue
Minnesota

….and based upon the way Nebraska has played in 2020 that looks like 1 more loss at least at Purdue which just lost back-to-back games against Very Mediocre Minnesota and Purdue and then a battle of the…

2 Biggest Cream Puff Teams in America on December 12 in Lincoln = Minnesota vs. Purdue

5.  Jeremy Pruitt, Tennessee – Somehow the Vols were able to wiggle out of playing Vanderbilt riding a 5 game losing streak which would with a loss to Vandy led to both Phil Fulmer and Jeremy Pruitt being fired within 24 hours and now 2 – 5 Tennessee has coming up…

Florida
Texas A&M

….the #5 and #6 teams in the country who are both motivated to keep winning to keep alive the potential for playing in the College Football Playoff which looks like 2 more losses and a….

2 – 7

…record of Jeremy Pruitt in his THIRD year on the job and if you are thinking that Tennessee could have hired…

Paul Finebaum to coach Tennessee

…and he done better than Jeremy Pruitt coaching the Vols the last 3 seasons…

You would be right!

If Tennessee did finish in Pruitt’s THIRD year on the job at…

Overall:  2 – 7

SEC:  2 – 7

….that would be quite the come-down from the last Vols Head Coach Butch Jones who in his THIRD year at Tennessee posted records of…

Overall:  9 – 4

SEC:  5 – 3

Yes…Congrats Tennessee Fans on that Great Hire the Great and God Almighty Himself Phil Fulmer made there in Jeremy Pruitt who is worse than the Head Coach the Vols ran out of town but don’t expect Fulmer or Pruitt to ever admit they have been wrong on Tennessee Football or Anything Else because you see when you are a…

Pompous Arrogant Ass like both Fulmer and Pruitt

….are in our humble opinion fully expect them to Takedown Tennessee Football and burn down everything in sight before they leave town with Millions and Millions of Dollars of YOUR $$$…in our humble opinion.

6.  Justin Fuente, Virginia Tech – Justin Fuente, even in the 10 – 4 season in his first year on the job at Virginia Tech, has lost 4+ games every season he has coached the Hokies and with already 5 losses on the board in 2020 with a record of 4 – 5 and games left against…

Clemson
Virginia

….that at best will be 5 – 6 in Justin Fuente’s FIFTH year on the job in Blacksburg and if that is acceptable to the folks that support Virginia Football then Bless you folks!

It’s hard to know anymore what the Expectations are a place like Virginia Tech, which we would guess would be Playing for the ACC Title Every Damn Year but maybe we are wrong, so we don’t have a good handle on whether Justin Fuente can survive going 5 – 6 in his FIFTH year on the job at Va. Tech but maybe he can….maybe he can!

7.  Dino Babers, Syracuse – Syracuse played NC State on the road tough before losing 36 – 29 and it was nice to see some fight in the Orange, but with that loss Syracuse falls to…

1 – 9

…in 2020 and they still have to play a game against…

The Irish will be very motivated to not only Win but make it a Big Win and that means the Orange are going to finish at…

1 – 10

….in Dino Babers FIFTH year on the job at Syracuse and because of Corona Virus maybe Dino can hang onto his job but for sure Dino will be on a Roaring Hot Seat entering the 2021 season if he is back to coach the OAt Notre Damnrange next year!

8.  Les Miles, Kansas – Why was Les Miles hired as the Head Coach at Kansas when the…

Last Damn Thing on Earth that Kansas needed was another Fired Re-Tread Coach 2 Seasons Ago?

No idea but Les Miles records the last 2 seasons at Kansas now stand at…

Overall:  3 – 16

Big 12:  1 – 14

….and again we ask no one in particular but mainly folks with Sub 2 IQs because they be the only ones EVER consider hiring Les Miles at Kansas 2 seasons ago >

Why was Les Miles hired at Kansas?

Kansas now at 0 – 7 has left in 2020….

At Texas Tech
Texas

…which sure looks like 2 losses to us and…

0 – 9

…in Les Miles 2 nd year on the job and again…

Why was Les Miles hired at Kansas?

9.  Mike Leach, Mississippi State – If Mississippi State is going to fire a coach in Joe Moorhead who posted records of…

8 – 5
6 – 7

….in 2 seasons at the school then the coach you hired to replace Moorhead whether it’s Mike Leach or Anyone Else if they have posted a record of…

2 – 6

…you will find your ass squarely on the Hot Seat and the 2 – 6 Bulldogs have left to play in 2020…

Auburn

…in a game that Gus Malzahn cannot lose because if Malzhan does lose to this Totally Pitiful Mississippi State Team on December 12 there’s a very good chance that Malzahn will be fired so we don’t see Auburn losing this game…but they could….it’s Freaking Gus Malzahn!

If Mississippi State does lose to Auburn to fall to 2 – 7 in 2020 then Mike Leach will enter the 2021 season on of the Hottest Hot Seats in America and Oh how the Bulldogs football program has fallen since Dan Mullen took off for Florida but it fell Helluva Lot Further when the Pirate showed-up and do we think Mike Leach gives 2 Damn Rips about anything but his Own Precious Ass?

No…Mike Leach is in our opinion one of the Most Selfish Human Beings on the Earth and like his “Hero” Mike loves talking about how “Tough” he is and “War” and all kinds of other Damn Nonsense but has Mike Leach or his “Hero” spent one nanosecond serving in the US Military?

Of course not….just 2 Candy Asses love talking “Tough” but asses go running like Damn Cowards when things get “Tough” like all the other Damn Cowards that block people on Twitter that dare disagree with their Precious Asses!

10.  Jeff Brohm, Purdue – The last 2 seasons Jeff Brohm has been paid…

2019:  $5.35M
2020:  $5.55M

….for a Total of $10.9M and in the last 2 seasons Brohm has posted records of…

Overall:  6 – 11

Big Ten:  5 – 9

…..and one would think if you going to be paid almost $11M Dollars you would get your football team to show-up and play football and yet the Boilermakers look like one of the…

Worst Coached Teams in Power 5 Conference Football

…and are now on a 3 Game Losing Streak with games left against…

Nebraska
At Indiana

No way this Purdue team beats Indiana in 2020 but can they beat a…

Pitiful and Mediocre Nebraska Team at home on Saturday?

Who knows because both Nebraska and Purdue are…

2 of the Worst Coached Teams in Power 5 Conference Football

Oh Jeff Brohm is slated to make $5.7M+ in 2021!

Be Proud fans of Purdue Football….Be Oh So Proud!

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Few Comments On FBS Head Coaching Hires To Date – Post 2019 Post-Regular Season Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

December 12, 2019

We will have a lot more to say about the New FBS Head Coaching Hires in January 2020 but so far….

Appalachian State – Shawn Clark – No Clue About

Arkansas – Sam Pittman – The Worst Head Coaching Hire in College Football History…YES…even worse than Charlie Weis Hired by Kansas…in our humble opinion!

Colorado State – Steve Addazio – We would not hire Steve Addazio to Shovel Shit in Eastern Colorado forget about to coach Colorado State because in our opinion Addazio is a Pompous Arrogant Ass Punk and a Sorry Damn Excuse for a Human Being and top of all that…he’s an Average As Hell Coach!

Florida Atlantic – Willie Taggert – Whatever. Makes No Sense To Us but….Whatever.

Missouri – Eli Drinkwitz – Eli can coach the game of football and we expect him to WIN at Missouri…how much he will WIN is up for debate but the guy can coach and he will WIN at Mizzou!

Old Dominion – Ricky Rahne – No Clue About

Ole Miss – Lane Kiffin – Lane Kiffin is a different + better Human Being and a better Football Coach than the guy who was fired on the tarmac at Los Angeles International Airport and we will be interested to see what Lane can do at Ole Miss. Our expectations is that he will average 7 to 8 wins a season over the first 3 seasons which is Pretty Damn Good at Ole Miss. Whether Lane Kiffin can do better than that is really up to Lane Kiffin!

Rutgers – Greg Schiano – We don’t like Greg Schiano and consider him to be a Pompous Arrogant Ass Jerk and we would never hire the guy to coach any football team we were associated with but maybe he can win at Rutgers….maybe not. It’s a tough place to win sitting in the Big Ten East Division and Rutgers should be a better football program than Maryland but the rest of the teams in that division….those teams will be very hard to pass.

South Florida – Jeff Scott – Jeff Scott has been a solid assistant coach but now he’s got to lead a South Florida football program that should be winning 8+ games a season and let’s see what the kid can do.

UNLV – Marcus Arroyo – Really? What a Crazy Ass Hire!

UTSA – Jeff Traylor – No Clue About

Washington – Jimmy Lake – Jimmy Lake has always impressed us as an assistant coach at Washington and we are interested to see what he can do following Chris Petersen who elevated the Huskies to place where they haven’t been since Rick Neuheisel’s days at UW and now it’s up to Jimmy Lake to do that as well. Good Luck to you Jimmy!

Let’s bring out the Great Johnny Cash to give these Hot Seat Coaches Hell!

Thank You Johnny!

Post 2019 Post-Regular Season Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

1.  Tom Herman, Texas – There really is no explanation for what has been going on at Texas since the Longhorns won the National Championship in 2009 and have posted the following records since >

2010 = 5 – 7
2011 = 8 – 5
2012 = 9 – 4
2013 = 8 – 5
2014 = 6 – 7
2015 = 5 – 7
2016 = 5 – 7
2017 = 7 – 6
2018 = 10 – 4
2019 = 7 – 5

That’s 4+ losses for the Mighty Texas Longhorns for 10 straight seasons now and 5+ losses in 7 of the last 10 seasons!

What exactly is going on at Texas which has plenty of talent but can’t seem to find a Head Coach that can win on any kind of consistent basis is a mystery to us and the current Head Coach Tom Herman is now sitting on records of >

Overall:  24 – 15

Big 12:  17 – 10

An even worse record is Herman’s W/L against FBS Teams with .500+ records…

10 – 8

This is Texas Football we are talking about here where the coaches should be able to roll the footballs out on the practice fields and the team would win 7 games a year with the players coaching themselves….and yet Herman has only won 7 games in 2 of his 3 seasons at the school!

Now with that 7 – 5 record Tom Herman and the Longhorns get to play Utah in the Alamo Bowl a team that just got whipped and embarrassed in the Pac-12 Title Game against Oregon and who will surely be Royally Pissed-Off when they get to San Antonio and will be looking to obliterate a Texas that looks Very Damn Obliteratable!

7 – 6 in Year 3 for Tom Herman would be nothing short of a Complete Disaster and set-up 2020 to be the season that will determine not only Herman’s future at Texas but his head coaching career Period!

2.  Kevin Sumlin, Arizona – It’s not just that Kevin Sumlin is now sitting on records at Arizona of…

Overall:  9 – 15

Pac-12:  6 – 12

…but that the Wildcats under Sumlin really haven’t beat many decent teams at all with a record in 2 seasons against FBS Teams with .500+ records of…

2 – 15

….and that is nothing short of a football program on the brink of sinking into Total Oblivion with now very few people in Tucson that really even care about Arizona Football anymore.

Kevin Sumlin in our opinion has turned Arizona Football into an operation that exists for one reason and that is to serve his Massive Ego and if Arizona Football has to be taken down on the cross of the Great Kevin Sumlin then it will be taking down the AD at the school….Dave Heeke….cheering that taking down of the football program that he is supposed to be supervising…in our humble opinion.

In 2020 Arizona Football will be playing…

Hawaii
Portland State
At Texas Tech
Arizona State
Colorado
Oregon
Stanford
USC
At Oregon State
At UCLA
At Utah
At Washington

That looks like another sub-500 record to us which will probably lead to Arizona AD Dave Heeke giving Kevin Sumlin an extension because if you are willing to tolerate a record of 2 – 15 against FBS Teams with .500+ records then do you even care about you’re the football program?

No…in our humble opinion.

3.  Will Muschamp, South Carolina – It really is something that in your 51st game at a school like South Carolina that you can lose a game on your home field against your cross-state rival by…

35 Points

…and keep your job but that is what we have with Will Muschamp at South Carolina who has posted records at the school of…

Overall:  26 – 25

SEC:  15 – 17

….which isn’t very inspiring to us so how in the Hell could it be to anyone else in or around South Carolina and just take a look at what the Gamecocks are facing in 2020 >

Coastal Carolina
East Carolina
Missouri
At Kentucky
At Florida
Tennessee
Texas A&M
At Vanderbilt
Georgia
At LSU
Wofford
At Clemson

We count at least 6 losses and only 2 for-sure wins and the 4 remaining games who knows and that’s the problem for Will Muschamp at South Carolina as he heads into his 5th at USC….

No one knows what is coming and that by itself is a Complete Disaster for the near and long-term future of South Carolina Football!

Oh….Will Muschamp just hired just fired Colorado State head coach Mike Bobo to be the new offensive coordinator at South Carolina and Bobo’s offense in 2019 finished at…wait for it…

#70 in the FBS Football

The Bells of Doom just Keep On Ringing at South Carolina and what we need to do is to get someone to quit letting a Damn Fool to pull the ropes in Columbia! Yall folks gonna need to fire the bell ringer before any of this gets better!

4.  Mark Dantonio, Michigan State – As they say in the game of golf as it relates to how good of a player you are…

“You are what you shoot!”

…and over the past 4 seasons Mark Dantonio hasn’t been much at all at Michigan State >

Overall:  26 – 24

Big Ten:  17 – 19

This is Michigan State Football we are talking about here where Bozo the Clown could win 7 games a year and over the past 4 seasons Dantonio has averaged….

6.5 Wins A Season

….and the real problem at Michigan State University isn’t so much Dantonio Totally Gutting Spartans Football on the back of his Massive Ego but that the Athletic Director and President at MSU are Gutless Cowards who don’t really care that Dantonio is Gutting Spartans Football and why would they since this is an institution that let Pure Damn Evil go on at their school for years with no one say a word so what’s allowing someone to GUT a football program?

Not really all that much by comparison!

Looking ahead to the 2020 Michigan State Football Schedule….

Northwestern
At BYU
Toledo
Miami (FL)
At Iowa
Michigan
Ohio State
At Indiana
Minnesota
At Penn State
Rutgers
At Maryland

…that looks like another 7 win or worse season to us so the Bozo the Clown Football will continue in East Lansing for another season it seems and we will be right back here in the same spot a year from today with the Gutless Cowards still running things and accepting…

Total Damn Average and Worse Football!

5.  Derek Mason, Vanderbilt – We are talking about Vanderbilt when talking about Derek Mason which needs an Extraordinary Head Coach to post .500+ records every season…it can certainly be done…with an Extraordinary Head Coach but even a Good Head Coach can get Vandy to 6 wins in his 6th season on the job and yet Vandy in Mason’s 6th season on the job went…

3 – 9

That’s the problem at Vanderbilt…not so much that they are willing to accept Average Football with Mason’s records now at…

Overall:  27 – 47

SEC:  10 – 38

…but that they are willing to accept Way Damn Below Average Football in Mason’s 6th year on the job when the team should be getting…

Better Not Worse!

As anyone with a 2+ IQ we expect someone as they work in a job to get better at that job and when a coach has a football program going backwards as is the case with Mason at Vanderbilt right now you can either let it keep going backwards….Vandy’s choice…or go find someone who can start moving the thing FORWARD…not Vandy’s choice.

Be Happy Vandy Football Fans…Vanderbilt is choosing Going Backwards and that’s all you really need to know!

6.  Scott Frost, Nebraska – To really put into perspective what a Total Damn Disaster Scott Frost’s first two seasons at Nebraska have been just look at the records of past Nebraska Head Football Coaches after two seasons going back to Tom Osborne >

Tom Osborne = 18 – 5 – 1
Frank Solich = 21 – 5
Bill Callahan = 13 – 10
Bo Pelini = 19 – 8
Mike Riley = 15 – 11

Scott Frost = 9 – 15

Really now….does anyone doubt that if Scott Frost’s name was Willie Taggart he would have already had his ass run out of Lincoln?

Didn’t think so and Nebraska AD Bill Moos can say all he wants about “staying the course” with Scott Frost but reality is Frost will coaching for his job in 2020 because if he cannot get it done in 3 full seasons then there’s no point to any of this and with that in mind let’s look at the Huskers 2020 schedule >

Purdue
Central Michigan
South Dakota State
Cincinnati
At Northwestern
Illinois
At Rutgers
At Ohio State
Penn State
At Iowa
At Wisconsin
Minnesota

Barring a Massive Improvement by Nebraska between now and the 2020 season we see…

No Damn Way the Huskers get to 6 wins in 2020 and if they don’t the Scott Frost era will be OVER in Lincoln…and more than likely the Bill Moos era as well!

7.  Randy Edsall, Connecticut – Randy Edsall has now been 3 seasons at UConn, the school he left in the middle of the night without saying goodbye to his players when taking the Maryland job in 2015, and in those 3 seasons Edsall has posted records of….

Overall:  6 – 30

AAC:  2 – 22

….which includes ZERO AAC Conference Wins the last 2 seasons and Edsall still has a job at UConn?

Anyone that can explain the above and mainly that Randy Edsall is still employed at UConn will be doing the Damn Impossible!

8.  Manny Diaz, Miami – Manny Diaz took over a pretty decent Miami Football program from Mark Richt and promptly went…

6 – 6

….and….

4 – 4

…against FBS Teams with .500+ Records and this is Miami Football we are talking about here that finished the season with losses to….

Florida International – 6 – 6 record
Duke – 5 – 7 record

…and the program reeling and headed to the Independence Bowl to play a La. Tech football team which will whip Miami’s ass if the Hurricanes are not prepared to play the bowl game!

Looking at the 2020 Miami schedule…

Temple
Wagner
UAB
At Michigan State
At Georgia Tech
Duke
Florida State
North Carolina
Pitt
At Virginia
At Virginia
At Wake Forest

….in our opinion the Canes will have a tough time just getting to 6 wins in 2020 and Manny Diaz will be in the same spot a year from now that he is in today = Roaring Hot Seat!

9.  Dana Holgorsen, Houston – We cannot imagine that the folks at Houston who just fired a coach in Major Applewhite who posted records of…

2017 =  7 – 5
2018 =  8 – 5

….and hired a coach in Dana Holgorsen who just posted in his first year on the job of…

4 – 8

…can be very happy but then things been going South for several years at Houston so maybe Holgo imploding in Year 1 wasn’t a surprise to the folks in H-Town!

Oh…Holgorsen’s record in 2019 against FBS Teams with .500 records was….

0 – 8

Yes…you got that right….Houston got it’s 4 wins against….

Prairie View A&M – FCS
North Texas – 4 – 8 record
UConn – 2 – 10 record
Tulsa – 4 – 8 record

….so as bad as you think the 2019 season was for Dana Holgorsen and Houston…it was actually Much Damn Worse!

Looking at the 2020 Houston Football schedule….

Rice
At Washington State
North Texas
At BYU
At Cincinnati
Tulane
Tulsa
UCF
At Memphis
At Navy
At MSU
USF

….that looks like it’s going to be Very Tough for Houston to get 6 wins in 2020 and will that acceptable at a place where University of Houston President Renu Khator once said….

“We fire coaches that don’t win 10 games!”

Really?

If so why is Dana Holgorsen still employed at the University of Houston Prez?

10.  Chip Kelly, UCLA – Chip Kelly has now coached 2 seasons at UCLA and has posted records of….

2018 = 3 – 9
2019 = 4 – 8

Overall:  7 – 17

Pac-12:  7 – 11

…which certainly isn’t optimum but even worse is Kelly’s record against FBS Teams with .500+ records over two seasons….

3 – 15

Geez….Chip….you can do better than that Son!

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Tua’s College Career Ending Injury at Alabama – Don’t Believe Someone Just Because They Are Wearing A White Coat! – 2019 Post Week 12 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – Thank You Johnny Cash!

November 19, 2019

Tua’s College Career Ending Injury at Alabama – Don’t Believe Someone Just Because They Are Wearing A White Coat!

There’s a Helluva Lot we could write about Tua’s college career ending hip injury at Alabama, but it is the opinion of the Doctors who are members of Coaches Hot Seat that the surgery for a high ankle sprain that Tua had was Totally Damn Unnecessary and that Tua should have just rested his ankle for a couple of weeks and come back and played when healthy enough to play again!

We have visited the Great State of Alabama dozens of times in the 13 seasons that Coaches Hot Seat has existed and dozens of times before that going back to the early 1980s and there is a serious problem in Alabama that far Damn too many people will do something just because a Doctor tells them to do something. It is our opinion that there is Way Damn Too Much orthopedic surgery going on in the state of Alabama, across the Southern United States, and with University of Alabama athletes and it is far past time for Nick Saban, AD Greg Byrne, parents of Alabama athletes, and others around Alabama to quit always deferring to a surgeon just because he or she recommends surgery!

We have some news for you folks…

Surgeons Love To Do Surgery because…they make a Helluva Lot of $$$….doing Damn surgery!

We will go further than that…

Surgeons will often do Total Damn Horseshit Surgeries and it is our opinion that the high ankle sprain surgery that Tua got by the Doctors who work for the University of Alabama Football team was…

Total Damn Horseshit!

That’s our opinion as American Citizens and as former athletes because a high ankle sprain, which many of us had in high school and college, is something that needs to be rested for 2 to 3 weeks. YES…Tua would have been out for a couple of weeks resting that ankle but instead he had surgery done and then was rushed back for the LSU game…in our opinion…which was game he was obviously limping in even in the first half and which led to him being a lot less mobile quarterback…and wait for it…a lot less mobile quarterback will have a hard time getting away from defenders just like Tua wasn’t able to do against Mississippi State when he took the hit that ended his college career!

Damn Idiocy goes like this….

Total Horseshit High Ankle Sprain Surgery
Tua Is Not Totally Healthy For LSU Game and Plays Limping Throughout
Tua Is Not Totally Healthy for Mississippi State Game and Plays and Is Not That Mobile
Tua Gets College Career Ending Hit Because His Ass….Is Not As Mobile As He Should Be Because…Wait For It….His Ass Should Have NEVER Has the High Ankle Sprain Surgery!

Memo to Nick Saban: Just because a Doctor or Surgeon says that he or she should do “X” for an Alabama player does not mean you should accept that advice or that the player should take that advice, and it would be good policy for You and the Player + His Family to get 2 or even 3 other opinions on the issue and if you had done that with Tua on both his high ankle sprain surgeries there’s a very Damn good chance…

Neither Surgery Would Have Happened!

Here’s the problem with far too many people in Alabama and across America >

Just because someone in white coat who thinks his or her Precious Ass is God-All-Damn-Knowing Everything because they went to medical school doesn’t mean you do something just because they told you to do something and if Nick Saban had…

Worked One Damn Day in the Real World

…his ass would know this by now but since Nick Saban has…

Not Worked One Damn Day in the Real World In His Entire Damn Life

…he actually believes Damn Everything a doctor tell him!

Sorry Nick…Doctors and Surgeons are not only Incompetent at Times they only make $$$….doing Things like Surgeries…not just for athletes at Alabama but because they can tell other patients and the family of patients…

“We did the Tua surgery!”

Think Nick Saban….it’s time for you to THINK Son!

Surgeons make Millions of Dollars….wait for it….Doing Damn Surgery….and just because some Surgeon Hack has made Tens of Millions of Dollars doing surgery and has big houses in Birmingham and on the Gulf Coast does NOT mean that you have to believe his Worthless Hack Ass or the what his “mentees” believe should be done Saban and when your ass finally understands that you will for the first time in your life actually begin…

Looking out for your players instead of always taking the advice of people that make all that money doing things…such as unnecessary surgeries…that happens in our opinion…

Thousands of Times in the State of Alabama Every Damn Year!

Get A Damn Clue Nick Saban and next time you have player that is not 100% healthy….

Don’t Play His Ass in a game that you could have won playing Captain Kangaroo at Quarterback!

This is on YOU Nick Saban for blindly believed Hack Surgeons who make Millions of Dollars doing surgery and or playing Tua against Mississippi State when he should NOT have even been dressed for the game!

Needless to say ALL of the above are our opinions…they are educated opinions…but they are our opinions!

Let’s bring out the Late Great Johnny Cash to give these Hot Seat Coaches Hell!

Thank You Johnny!

2019 Post Week 12 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

1.  Mark Dantonio, Michigan State – One of the most important things for people running anything from a company to an athletic department are troubling trends and Mark Dantonio is on one Helluva troubling trend at Michigan State with a record in Big Ten Conference play the last four seasons of…

15 – 19

…and even worse…

6+ losses in 3 of the last 4 seasons!

6+ losses in 3 of the last 4 seasons is just flat-out Frightening to anyone that cares about Michigan State football and when one looks ahead to 2020 the Spartans have…

At BYU
Toledo
Miami

….in addition to 9 Big Ten Conference games and does anyone think 2020 is going to be better than 2019 when it seems Mark Dantonio is unable to make the necessary changes to keep up with modern game of football?

Not in our opinion and Michigan State now at 4 – 6 on the season have left to play…

At Rutgers
Maryland

…which are 2 of the worst 10 teams in FBS Football in 2019 and if Spartans lose either game one would have to think that Dantonio is done in East Lansing.

2.  Scott Frost, Nebraska – Scott Frost sitting on records in his second season at Nebraska of…

Overall:  8 – 14

Big Ten:  5 – 11

….and has been nothing short of a Total Disaster with no end in sight because the Huskers play is often unorganized, undisciplined…un-coached even at times…and now at 4 – 6 on the season Nebraska has left…

At Maryland
Iowa

This 2019 Maryland team is one of the worst Power 5 Conference School Teams we have seen play in recent memory and what if….YES…what if Nebraska went to College Park and….GASP….lost to Maryland?

If Nebraska loses to Maryland then Scott Frost may indeed be done because it would be a loss that Nebraska Football may never recover from under Frost or any other coach in the foreseeable future which is roughly 10 years in our mind so we would REALLY recommend Scott Frost not lose to this game to the Terps!

Oh….after 22 games as the Head Football Coach at Nebraska >

Scott Frost =  8 – 14

Mike Riley =  13 – 9

You think Scott Frost is in a Helluva Tough Spot with very few ways to get out of this corner?

You would be right!

Don’t lose to Maryland Scott!

3.  Will Muschamp, South Carolina – The folks in Columbia, South Carolina can remain in all the Denial of Reality mode they want but there’s no getting around the FACT that Will Muschamp in his FOURTH season as the Head Football Coach at South Carolina is sitting on a record of 4 – 7 with only a game left against…

Clemson

…and without a Miracle From the Heavens that…

4 – 8

….record in Boom’s FOURTH season at South Carolina and if that’s acceptable to the folks in Columbia then More The Damn Power to Their Asses but please don’t tell us you were raised by Real Americans forget about Real Southerners who actually value Winning!

Oh…Will Muschamp’s records now in FOUR seasons at South Carolina >

Overall:  26 – 24

SEC:  15 – 17

Interesting are Will Muschamp’s records in FOUR seasons at Florida >

Overall: 28 – 21

SEC: 17 – 15

Hmmmm….anyone noticing a trend here?

Thought So!

4.  Joe Moorhead, Mississippi State – We are not quite sure what the folks at Mississippi State thought Joe Moorhead would do in Starkville record wise but we are guessing it’s not this with 2 games left in his 2nd season on the job >

Overall:  12 – 11

SEC:  6 – 9

The 4 – 6 Bulldogs are playing Uber-Cupcake Abilene Christian on November 23 and finish the season hosting Ole Miss in the Egg Bowl and will it take Moorhead beating Mississippi to hang onto his job?

Maybe so because imagine this scenario for a moment if Mississippi State did lose the Egg Bowl >

Moorhead would be sitting on a 5 – 7 record in his 2nd season right after a loss to Ole Miss which is sitting on record of….wait for it…4 – 7 right now!

There just ain’t no way to defend Joe Moorhead going 5 – 7 in his 2nd season on the job AND losing the Egg Bowl AND not going to a bowl game in this age of even the Damn Sorry and Average As Hell go to bowl games!

5.  Barry Odom, Missouri – Barry Odom is working on his 4th season as the Head Coach at Missouri and he is sitting on records of…

Overall:  24 – 24

SEC:  12 – 18

…which Ain’t That Good and with Mizzou now at 5 – 5 with games left against…

Tennessee
At Arkansas

….if Odom lost these last two games we have to think that would be the end of the Odom era at Missouri…..right?

Yep!

6.  Derek Mason, Vanderbilt – Derek Mason is in his 6th season at Vanderbilt and has records on the board of…

Overall:  26 – 46

SEC:  10 – 37

…and that is 10 SEC Conference wins in 6 season….Not So Damn Good!

Even worse is Mason’s record of 2 – 8 in his 6th season with games still left against…

East Tennessee State
At Tennessee

…which looks like 3 – 9 to us which will be….

The same record Derek Mason posted in his first season at Vanderbilt in 2014!

4 – 8 to 4 – 8 = No Damn Improvement At All!

7.  Tom Herman, Texas – We had high expectations for Tom Herman at Texas but heading towards the end of Year 3 Herman is sitting on records of…

Overall:  23 – 14

Big 12:  16 – 9

…..and we just didn’t see Herman with 4 losses on the board this season and thought at most the Longhorns have 2 losses heading into the last 2 games of the season…

At Baylor
Texas Tech

Baylor is going to be really motivated to win this game against Texas and Texas Tech has been in almost every game they have played this season so there’s a chance that a Terribly Disappointing season could turn into a Total Disaster of a Season for Tom Herman and already our 2 Texas-alum buddies who live in the Austin area are telling us…

“Herman is treading in some very dangerous waters.”

We recommend you find a way to beat Baylor and Texas Tech Tom or your will be coaching for your job and head coaching career in 2020 at Texas!

8.  Kevin Sumlin, Arizona – After Kevin Sumlin got fired at Texas A&M putting up Pretty Average Numbers in College Station with a boatload of money given to him on the way out the door there’s just no way we would have hired him at a place like Arizona where you need Head Coach that is…

Fired-Up and Will Fight Your Ass In Every Damn Game

….because with all that money will Sumlin be…

Fired-Up and Will Fight Your Ass In Every Damn Game?

Not in our opinion and thus in Sumlin’s 2nd year at Arizona he is now sitting on records of…

Overall:  9 – 13

Pac-12:  6 – 10

….with the 4 – 6 Wildcats still having games to play against…

Utah
At Arizona State

That looks like a 4 – 8 record to us and looking to 2020 is there anyone in Tucson that thinks that next season will be any better under Kevin Sumlin?

The 2020 Arizona Football schedule….

Hawaii
Portland State
At Texas Tech
Colorado
Oregon
Stanford
USC
At Oregon State
At UCLA
At Utah
At Washington
At Arizona State

We would be STUNNED if Arizona won even 6 games in 2020…in our humble opinion!

9.  Dana Holgorsen, Houston – When one considers that Dana Holgorsen is sitting on a record of…

3 – 7

….in his first year at Houston let’s consider for a moment that the Powers That Be at the University of Houston including Tilman Fertitta who has his hands in everything when it comes to Houston Football and Basketball let’s look at the records of the last Houston Head Football Coach Major Applewhite who got his ass run out of Houston by those Powers That Be >

2017:  7 – 5
2018:  8 – 5

Overall:  15 – 11

AAC:  10 – 6

Now if the above records were not good enough to keep your rear-end employed at Houston then what exactly is…

3 – 7

…doing for your ass?

Anyone know where Tilman Fertitta is at and what he thinks about Holgo sitting on a record of 3 – 7 with still games to played against…

At Tulsa
Navy?

Oh…no one has seen Get Us Some More Rolls Boy?

Didn’t think so but then when things going good Get Us Some Rolls Boy ass is plastered Anywhere and Everywhere in the media and beyond but his ass is nowhere to be seen now which is…

No Damn Surprise to anyone with 2+ IQ!

10.  Gus Malzahn, Auburn – The word on the street on The Plains before the 2019 season started was that if Gus Malzahn lost the 4 games to…

LSU
Florida
Georgia
Alabama

…he would be done at Auburn and with losses to those first three teams on the board it really is now only a win over Alabama that can stop from the Gus Malzahn era from being brought to an end so with games left against..

Samford
Alabama

…both at Jordan-Hare Stadium what is the appropriate Game Theory approach for Gus Malzahn as he head towards the critical game against Bama?

If we were Gus Malzahn we probably would not take the Arkansas job even if offered but rather just let Auburn fire him and then see what other jobs might be open between now and the end of the year and if one of those jobs looked like a place you can win at….then maybe take it….but if not we would probably just take the $25 or so million that Auburn owes us and go relax and do some traveling the world for a year and then come back to coaching at the end of 2020 Relaxed, Refreshed, and Ready To Go!

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2018 Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Ranking – Let’s Bring Out The Great Johnny Cash To Get Things Rolling! Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny!

September 6, 2018 0 Comments

Time does fly and the 2018 College Football Season marks the 12 th year of the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings and recently a Coaches Hot Seat member said…

“We cranked this thing up in 2007 when Saban got to Alabama and Hell we might as well keep it going for as long as Nick is still alive and working for a living in Tuscaloosa!”

Amen and that should be thru the 2022 season…right Nick?

Let’s bring out the Great Johnny Cash to get things rolling! Give these Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny!

Thank You Mr. Cash!

2018 Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Ranking

1.  Urban Meyer, Ohio State – When the story about Zach Smith broke at Ohio State several weeks back we called a long-time friend of ours in Columbus and asked him what he thought of Smith and his opinion and what he said to us was:

“He’s a punk.”

We asked: “Would you like to expand on that?”

“Nope….just…he’s a punk.”

After watching the ESPN interview with Zach Smith we had the same exact opinion and whatever happened between Smith and his wife in what seems like a very bitter marriage on both sides when you read the report that Ohio State produced on the Zach Smith – Urban Meyer situation we could not help but wonder how Meyer kept his job keeping such a Sorry Excuse for a Human Being on his staff for so long not only risking his own job but the entire Ohio State football program for….”a punk!”

The entire story just makes no freaking sense even if you understand Smith is Earle Bruce’s grandson because where we come from the children of legends are held to a higher standard not a lower one and with that in mind and realizing what went on at Florida under Urban Meyer there is still a chance something else could come out on this entire Smith + Meyer issue in the coming weeks and all it would take is one piece of information to confirm that years ago Meyer also knew Smith was a “punk” and kept him on staff….and maybe for an interesting reason.

Who knows and we shall see about all that so Urban Meyer enters the 2018 College Football Season on the #1 Hot Seat and we will hold him to the same standard as any other coach which includes not only how his football team plays on the field but how the coach runs the football program and manages himself…and his coaches!

After the win over hapless Oregon State the Buckeyes have left in 2018:

Rutgers – without Meyer
TCU – without Meyer
Tulane
At Penn State
Indiana
Minnesota
At Purdue
Nebraska
At Michigan State
At Maryland
Michigan

Only Alabama has more talent on their roster than Ohio State and without the entire Smith – Meyer self-inflicted disaster we would guess 12 – 0 for the Buckeyes in 2018…with the Smith – Meyer self-inflicted disaster our guess for OSU in 2018 >

10 – 2

2.  David Beaty, Kansas – It’s just impossible to explain why now fired Kansas AD Sheahon Zenger’s hired Charlie Weis and David Beaty to coach the Kansas football team unless Zenger is Mentally Insane or a Damn Moron or he just….

Doesn’t Know A Damn Thing About The Game Of Football

…and our guess it was a combination of the last 2 on why he hired Weis and Beaty when there were at least 20 coaches that would have been Home Run hires for the Jayhawks many of which didn’t even get a call!

In 4 seasons at Kansas David Beaty has posted records of…

Overall:  3 – 34

Big 12:  1 – 26

…and those 3 wins are over:

Rhode Island
Texas
SE Missouri State

Add to this tale of horrors the opening season loss to Nicholls in 2018 and we don’t think there’s a chance in Hell that Kansas wins a game this season with these games left to play:

At Central Michigan
Rutgers
At Baylor
Oklahoma State
At West Virginia
At Texas Tech
TCU
Iowa State
At Kansas State
At Oklahoma
Texas

NOPE….Kansas will be 0 – 12 in 2018 and will be hiring a new head football coach come December and we can think of 10+ coaches that would be GREAT hires at the school and we have to think new KU AD Jeff Long will look at few of them but will Jeff hire someone who can bring some much needed energy and offensive fire-power to Lawrence?

Maybe…Jeff Long is not an Idiot…far from it…but he did hire Bielema at Arkansas when he could have had the better version of Bobby Petrino in Jeff Brohm so maybe Long will make a hiring mistake at a place that has had a Helluva Lot of hiring mistakes in the last 40 years!

3.  Kliff Kingsbury, Texas Tech – The train wreck that is now Texas football is partially responsible for the Total Disaster in Lubbock which keeps rolling down the tracks because Tom Herman’s Horns let Kingsbury and Tech come into Austin in the last regular season game of 2017 and beat Texas which got the Red Raiders to 6 wins….not that 6 wins in your FIFTH season on the job should let Kingsbury keep his job…but it did and the….

Total Disaster in Lubbock Train Keeps-A-Rolling In Lubbock!

Mike Leach and Tommy Tuberville were the two head coaches at Texas Tech before Kingsbury got to Lubbock and below are their average wins per season numbers at Tech:

Mike Leach:  8.4

Tommy Tuberville:  6.67

Kliff Kingsbury has averaged….

6 wins per season

…and if that can keep you employed in Lubbock….Geez….that’s a low and embarrassing bar for football at Texas Tech!

Now at 0 – 1 Texas Tech has left on its schedule in 2018:

Lamar
Houston
At Oklahoma State
West Virginia
At TCU
Kansas
At Iowa State
Oklahoma
Texas
At Kansas State
Baylor

That looks like 3 – 9 or 4 – 8 to us and a pretty good job in Texas Tech opening up in early December at the latest!

4.  Jim Harbaugh, Michigan – Many of us got to see Jim Harbaugh up close and personal when he was coaching Stanford and even the San Francisco 49ers but we haven’t had the ability to know what exactly has been going on at Michigan since Jimmy took the job in 2015. That changed earlier this year when a good friend of ours took a job at the University of Michigan that we have known for 20+ years, and he has for the last several months been feeding us lots of interesting information on what has been going on with Michigan Football and its information we can use because this guy knows the game of football.

Before we get to what our good friend has been telling us about Jimmy and Blue for the last several months we must be upfront and honest and say…

We like Jim Harbaugh and want him to succeed at Michigan

….and although we didn’t agree with some of the things he did with the 49ers like benching Alex Smith for Colin Kaepernick or letting Aldon Smith off easy after several incidents including a DUI which just made Smith’s life worse as anyone paying attention can see we can start anew and we did start anew when Jim took the Michigan job and we have pulled for him and his team in every game.

With the loss to Notre Dame Jim Harbaugh has now coached 40 games at Michigan and his record after those 40 games is….

28 – 12  (.700)

Not too bad you might say….well let’s see what the records were of Jim’s predecessors at Michigan after 40 games on the job:

Brady Hoke:  27 – 13

Rich Rodriguez:  15 – 22 (didn’t make it to 40 games!)

Lloyd Carr:  30 – 10

Gary Moeller:  31 – 6 – 3

Bo Schembechler:  35 – 5

Considering the Millions of Dollars that Michigan is paying Jim Harbaugh and considering not only his 28 – 12 record after 40 games and his 1 – 6 record in CRITICAL rivalry games one would think that Jim’s record would be closer to Bo’s than Brady Hoke’s and for Damn sure in the first game of Jim’s FOURTH year at Michigan one would expect a little better effort in their opening game against Notre Dame…but NO…it was a Pitiful Effort for the most part against the Irish!

Getting back to our friend who went to at least 10 Stanford games with us when Jim was coaching the Cardinal who is now in Ann Arbor, he has been poking around the Michigan Football program a bit and he joined us at Lake Tahoe in August for a week and on the first night we sat down and asked him a very simple question:

“What the Hell is going on with Michigan under Harbaugh?”

Ann Arbor Friend:  I resisted my first thought for a long time but there’s little doubt in my mind now that Jim has lost the passion and fire he had for football at Stanford and certainly at the 49ers for awhile and that has seeped into the entire team and program and that is why in my opinion the team has looked so lackluster, unmotivated, almost un-coached at times in last couple of years.

We all just sat their quiet for a few seconds without anyone saying a word no doubt each of us thinking back to some of Michigan’s games the last couple of seasons and also no doubt in our minds also there’s something going on with Jim Harbaugh. We haven’t a clue what it is, but whatever is going on whether it is an outside influence or force or it is something internal Jim seems to have lost his passion and fire for football and many of things we saw at Stanford including taking care of every little detail combined with a deep passion for football is what drove Jim Harbaugh in life…and it’s just gone now in our opinion based upon what we have seen with our own eyes and what our friend on the ground in Ann Arbor at this moment is telling us.

What exactly does that mean for the immediate future of Michigan football?

It’s hard to say, but now at 0 – 1 with the below games still left to be played this is going to be one TOUGH season for the Wolverines!

Western Michigan
SMU
Nebraska
At Northwestern
Maryland
Wisconsin
At Michigan State
Penn State
At Rutgers
Indiana
At Ohio State

Michigan has everything it needs to beat every team left on its scheduled save Ohio State in Columbus but if we had to guess we would say Blue will lose the following games…

At Northwestern
Wisconsin
At Michigan State
Penn State
At Ohio State

You add in loss to Notre Dame and that’s SIX losses so let’s say Michigan only loses 4 of the above games…..that’s FIVE losses….and we have some news for Jim Harbaugh….

You cannot survive a 7 – 5 season in your FOURTH season at Michigan with each season getting worse in number of wins!

Not that we would bother Jimmy but if we could bother him right now the #1 thing we would tell him is….

Find Your Passion For The Game Of Football Again Son

….NO not for Horseshit around the game but for FOOTBALL and that is your means of salvation out of the funk that Michigan Football is now in!

Also the offensive playcalling is a Freaking Disaster and we don’t see anyone on the Michigan offensive staff that has a Damn Clue how to call plays so maybe you should call plays Jimmy!

Good Luck Son!

5.  Larry Fedora, North Carolina – Larry Fedora hasn’t exactly been tearing things up in Chapel Hill as the head football coach at UNC the last six seasons….save 2015….posting records of:

2012:  8 – 4
2013:  7 – 6
2014:  6 – 7
2015:  11 – 3
2016:  8 – 5
2017:  3 – 9

With the loss to California to start the 2018 season Fedora is now…

10 – 17

….in his last 27 games coaching the Tar Heels and that’s a run that cannot continue or North Carolina will be looking for a new head coach come December and there’s a pretty good one up the road at Appalachian State in Scott Satterfield who no doubt love a shot at the UNC job who is just one of a dozen quality head and assistant coaches that would walk to Chapel Hill to coach the Tar Heels!

Now at 0 – 1 after the loss to Cal the Tar Heels have left in 2018:

At East Carolina
UCF
Pitt
At Miami
Virginia Tech
At Syracuse
At Virginia
Georgia Tech
At Duke
Western Carolina
NC State

Geez….that’s a TOUGH remaining schedule and after posting a record of 3 – 9 in 2017 one would think Fedora would have to get to 6 wins in 2018 to hang onto his job….Hell…he might need 7 wins in his SEVENTH year on the job at UNC to return and coach in 2019.

6. Willie Taggart, Florida State – We don’t have a Damn Clue what Willie Taggart and the Florida State coaching staff has been doing the last 8 months in getting FSU ready for the 2018 football season but from where we sat….

They were not doing a Damn thing

….because that was just flat-out a Damn embarrassment on Monday night against Virginia Tech for the Seminoles and Willie better Damn get this thing straightened out or he might find his ass out of a job and Lane Kiffin coaching Florida State before Willie can even get settled in Tallahassee! Oh…that Lane Kiffin to Florida State idea was given to us by an FSU-alum we have know since the late 1980s when couple of us lived in Florida who called us on the way home from the Va. Tech – FSU game and was ripping Willie Taggart and the FSU coaching staff for nothing short of a Total Freaking Disaster…and he is right….it was a Total Freaking Disaster!

Looking at what Florida State has left on its 2018 schedule if the 0 – 1 Seminoles play like they did against Virginia Tech….

Samford
At Syracuse
Northern Illinois
At Louisville
At Miami
Wake Forest
Clemson
At NC State
At Notre Dame
Boston College
Florida

…they will be LUCKY to win 5 games and if FSU wins less than 5 games Willie Taggart will be fired in early December especially if Lane Kiffin is sitting on another 10+ win season at FAU, and it will not matter One Damn Iota what the buyout is because that was Freaking Coaching Malpractice against Virginia Tech with the FSU coaches actually make the players worse than if they had just coached themselves!

Get Off Your Damn Ass Willie!

7.  Kalani Sitake, BYU – It was nice to see Kalani Sitake get a solid win over Arizona on Saturday night because we personally like Coach Sitake and hope he succeeds at BYU just as all our Good Mormon friends in Utah do but just like our Good Mormon friends in Utah we are not going to tolerate BYU Football being Average or Below Average and thus why this is such a CRITCAL year for Sitake to get this ship righted!

With the win over the Wildcats Sitake’s record at BYU now stands at….

14 – 13

….and the Cougars have left to play in 2018:

Cal
At Wisconsin
McNeese
At Washington
Utah State
Hawaii
Northern Illinois
At Boise State
At UMass
New Mexico State
At Utah

That’s a pretty tough remaining schedule for BYU but we have it on pretty good authority that if Sitake can get to 6 wins in 2018 and thus the Cougars back to a bowl game there’s a better than “90% chance” that Sitake returns to coach BYU in 2019….but less than 6 wins….there’s a ”90% chance BYU makes a coaching change” so the Cougars need to find 5 more wins in their remaining 11 games.

Not easy….but certainly doable if BYU Football has improved on their 4 – 9 Total Disaster from a season ago!

8.  Luke Fickell, Cincinnati – Luke Fickell and his Cincinnati football team got a Must Win over a lackluster UCLA team to open the 2018 season but the Bearcats will need to keep things rolling to get their head coach off the Hot Seat and here’s what they have coming up:

At Miami, Ohio
Alabama A&M
Ohio
At UConn
Tulane
At Temple
At SMU
Navy
USF
At UCF
East Carolina

It’s a kind of a tough schedule but Cincinnati should be able to win at least 6 games in 2018 with 1 win already on the board and if they don’t win 6 games this season…..

Pitiful….Just Pitiful!

9.  Lovie Smith, Illinois – It was a challenge for Lovie Smith’s Illini to beat a below average Kent State team at home on Saturday in Smith’s 25 th game coaching Illinois which adds up to records in 3 seasons at the school of:

Overall:  6 – 19

Big Ten:  2 – 16

Now at 1 – 0 Illinois has left to play in 2018….

Western Illinois
USF
Penn State
At Rutgers
Purdue
At Wisconsin
At Maryland
Minnesota
At Nebraska
Iowa
At Northwestern

…and if you can barely beat Kent State how many of the above games can Illini win in 2018?

Our guess…maybe 2 or 3…tops 4!

We will go 4 – 8 for Illini in 2018 and a new head football coach at Illinois by Christmas!

10.  Tom Herman, Texas – We have 2 long-term fishing buddies in Austin who are Texas-alums that we have fished all over Texas with the last 20 or so years and after Texas lost to Maryland on Saturday we called one of those fishing buddies to get his take on the situation at Texas with head coach Tom Herman now sitting on records of….

Overall:  7 – 7

Big 12:  5 – 4

…and his response was:

“If Tom Herman is going to be an Arrogant Ass that’s OK with me…but he better start Damn winning some football games because he won’t last long being an Arrogant Ass and an Average Coach!”

We took that “he won’t last long” meaning that if Tom Herman doesn’t show significant improvement in 2018 the alums might start looking for a new head coach that is NOT…

An Arrogant Ass AND Can Win Some Football Games

…and with that in mind let’s see what the 0 – 1 Horns have left in 2018:

Tulsa
USC
TCU
At Kansas State
Oklahoma
Baylor
At Oklahoma State
West Virginia
At Texas Tech
Iowa State
At Kansas

We cannot see how Texas wins less than 8 games in 2018 with Tulsa and Kansas on the schedule but if Herman has improved Texas over that Pitiful Performance in 2017 then 9 wins seems like the mark that Herman needs to hit when you factor in that he is an Arrogant Ass!

Arrogant Asses have to win ONE more game a season to stay off the Hot Seat than Non-Arrogant Asses is how the rule works!

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10 CFB Head Coaches Facing MUST WIN Games in Week 2 – 10 Coaches + Teams That Need To Take It To The Limit! – Thank You Randy!

September 7, 2017 0 Comments

 

It’s early in the college football season being only Week 2 but there are 10 CFB Head Coaches facing MUST WIN Games and with that in mind we ask the Eagles and Randy Meisner to motivate these Coaches + Teams To Take It To the Limit to get a win in these games. Bring It Randy Meisner!

Thank You Randy!

Brian Kelly, Notre Dame vs. Georgia – In Brian Kelly’s last 15 games as the head coach at Notre Dame he has posted a record of….

5 – 10

….and after an opening with win over Temple the very last Damn thing Brian Kelly needs is a 2 nd year coach in Kirby Smart to bring a Georgia team into South Bend and beat the Irish. Looking at the rest of Notre Dame’s schedule after the Dawgs we only see one maybe “Sure Win” in Miami (OH) at home September 30, and with Kelly needing 10+ wins to be back as the head coach of the Irish in 2018 a loss to Georgia in this spot would nothing short of a Complete Freaking Disaster!

No…the Irish faithful will not be happy if Georgia beats Notre Dame on Saturday!

Bret Bielema, Arkansas vs. TCU – Bret Bielema’s overall coaching win/loss numbers at Arkansas are shocking enough at…

Overall:  26 – 26

SEC:  10 – 22

…but consider the following number for Bielema in his 5 years at Arkansas….his win/loss record against FBS teams:

14 – 25

Damn! Bret Bielema who is making around $4.5 million dollars a year and if fired at the end of this season has a buyout in the $10M+ range has a record against FBS teams of…Yes….look at that number again Razorback fans even if you don’t want to….

14 – 25

….which is a winning percentage of…

.359

Double Damn!

Do you think this Saturday’s game against TCU is big for Bret Bielema with 8 SEC Conference games still left on the 2017 schedule?

You better Damn believe it is because if Bielema loses this game at home to TCU there will be no funny story that can be told to explain a record against FBS teams of….

14 – 26 = .350

….which as one can clearly see is only…

14 wins in Bielema’s first 40 games against FBS teams!

Hell, the first person you picked randomly out of the Fayetteville White Pages could have posted the Pitiful Record of coaching the Razorbacks to 14 wins against the first 40 FBS teams Arkansas played!

Rich Rodriguez, Arizona vs. Houston – Some amazing numbers that we never thought we would see associated with Rich Rodriguez is that over the past 3 seasons at Arizona counting the first game of 2017 Rodriguez has posted a record of…

11 – 15

….overall in his last 26 games and a record of…

4 – 14

…in Pac-12 play over the past two seasons and before conference play gets going in 2017 Arizona better Damn beat Houston at home on Saturday night or this could be a mighty long season indeed with 10 games left and none of them a walk in the park kind of game:

At UTEP
Utah
At Colorado
UCLA
At Cal
Washington State
At USC
Oregon State
At Oregon
At Arizona State

Expectations are never real high for Arizona Football so even 6 wins would probably keep RichRod in Arizona for another season, but less than 6 wins which would be two straight losing seasons and a Wildcat program headed in Totally the wrong Damn direction and Rich Rodriguez may find himself doing television work for the 2018 college football season back at CBS Sports in New York!

Yep…you better Damn beat Houston on Saturday night Rich!

Barry Odom, Missouri vs. South Carolina – Even with a 4 – 8 record overall and 2 – 6 record in SEC Conference play Barry Odom did a decent job coaching Missouri in his first season as a head coach in 2016, but in Year 2 the expectations are moved up a bit and we are expecting the Tigers to win at least 6 games and if Odom hopes to get his ass off the Hot Seat and beating South Carolina at home on Saturday is a MUST WIN if Mizzou is to get 6 wins with the below remaining games to be played after the Gamecocks:

Purdue
Auburn
At Kentucky
At Georgia
Idaho
At UConn
Florida
Tennessee
At Vanderbilt
At Arkansas

Nope….we see no way in Hell that Missouri gets to 6 wins in 2017 without beating South Carolina on Saturday so that equals MUST WIN Game for you Barry Odom!

Tony Sanchez, UNLV vs. Idaho – After the opening game debacle loss to Howard when we didn’t even know Howard had a football team it is CRITICAL that Tony Sanchez get the shipped righted at UNLV and quickly and find a way to beat Idaho on the road which will not be an easy game to win in a very tough place to play against a fast-improving Vandals football team under head coach Paul Petrino. Tony Sanchez’s win/loss record in his 3 rd year at UNLV now stands at…

7 – 18

….and a loss to Idaho with Ohio State on deck and the MWC slate of conference games in the hole would be a very bad look indeed…very Damn bad Tony!

Jim Mora, UCLA vs. Hawaii – Jim Mora avoided what could have been a Total Meltdown of the UCLA football program in Week 1 courtesy of Kevin Sumlin and the Texas A&M coaching staff which gave away a sure-fire win to the Bruins and may have saved UCLA’s season because if the Bruins don’t beat A&M the whole Damn thing may have fell apart in Westwood which saw UCLA come into the first game of the 2017 season with a record of….

5 – 11

….in their last 16 games and with that in mind that makes this week’s Hawaii game a MUST WIN because a loss in this spot with a trip to play Memphis in Memphis on deck and then Stanford on The Farm next we are talking about what could be the end of the 2017 campaign before things really get going for the Bruins.

UCLA has two to three times as much talent as Hawaii and there really would be no good excuse for the Bruins to lose to the Warriors at the Rose Bowl and if that doesn’t equal MUST WIN Game then nothing does!

Tom Herman, Texas vs. San Jose State – The Tom Herman era at Texas tries for new start in Week 2 after the Total Disaster loss to Maryland at home in Week 1 that saw a Texas team play a football game that looked like they were hardly coached at all and this Week 2 game is against San Jose State which also has a first year head coach so this is not a game that the Longhorns can possibly lose….right? Hell…who the Hell knows!

No way Texas loses to San Jose State in Austin….BUT if Texas did lose this game then Tom Herman’s ass would be hotter than a Texas Summer day deep in the month of August!

Don’t lose this game to San Jose State Tom Herman…because if you do you will be the laughingstock of the American sports world after the Texas Athletic Department has been telling anyone that would listen for the last 8 months that you are the Second Coming of Darrell Royal and Mack Brown all rolled into one! No…don’t lose this game Son!

David Beaty, Kansas vs. Central Michigan – David Beaty is now in his 3 rd season coaching the Kansas Jayhawks football team and if Beaty is actually coaching-up KU worth a Damn there is not a chance in Hell that his football team loses to a Central Michigan team at home in Lawrence on Saturday, and we are very interested to see how this game plays out and finishes up because there are a lot of folks claiming on the plains of Kansas that the Jayhawks are improving under Beaty…well if they are then KU should easily beat at MAC team at home….right? Damn Right!

Oh…Kansas plays another MAC team in Week 3 in a game at Ohio so if Kansas can’t beat Central Michigan at home there is not a chance in Hell that KU beats Ohio on the road and if KU can’t beat Ohio on the road there is not a chance in Hell they win a Big 12 Conference game in 2017 and we all know where this is going because if KU doesn’t win a Big 12 Conference game in 2017 David Beaty and a few other folks are going to get their asses run out of Lawrence, Kansas come December!

Mark Dantonio, Michigan State vs. Western Michigan – Things for Mark Dantonio and Michigan State have been going straight downhill since Spartans QB Connor Cook through an interception just before the half of the 2015 CFB Playoff Semi-Final Game against Alabama when Michigan State was trailing Bama by a score of only 10 – 0 and driving for a TD that could have made the score 10 – 7 at half and since that incredibly foolish interception by Cook the Spartans have posted a record of….

4 – 10

….and Mark Dantonio is one loss at home to Western Michigan at home to finding his ass squarely on the Hot Seat with Notre Dame at home on deck and the entire 2017 Big Ten schedule still to be played.

Check-Out Michigan State’s remaining schedule after playing Western Michigan on Saturday:

Notre Dame
Iowa
At Michigan
At Minnesota
Indiana
At Northwestern
Penn State
At Ohio State
Maryland
At Rutgers

Geez….Yep…Western Michigan is a MUST WIN Game if Michigan State is interested in getting to at least 6 wins in 2017 and a loss in this spot could see the Spartans spiral down again like they did last season which from that Connor Cook interception against Alabama forward would be one of the fastest falls of a major program in college football history!

Come on Coach Dantonio!

Mark Whipple, UMass vs. Old Dominion – If UMass can play Hawaii tough at home in Week Zero we see no reason at all that UMass can’t beat Old Dominion at home in Week 2 and this is MUST WIN Game for head coach Mark Whipple and UMass with road games at Temple and Tennessee in Weeks 3 and 4!

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The 11th College Football Season of Coaches Hot Seat Kicks-Off! – 2017 Post Week One Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – Give These Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

September 5, 2017 0 Comments

 

Coaches Hot Seat was first dreamed up in October 2006 as a way to help force out then Stanford head football coach Walt Harris among a group of close friends who were having drinks at the Balboa Café in the Marina District of San Francisco, and here we are in September 2017 with Coaches Hot Seat now entering its 11 th college football season…a second decade now begins…with that same group of close friends tossing out their opinions from the peanut gallery about the relative status of college football head coaches job status vis-à-vis the warmth of their asses!

Coaches Hot Seat has been great fun from the start and has grown from a few close friends to over 170 members of Coaches Hot Seat now that mainly are members it seems to attend the annual Coaches Hot Seat Summer Clambake at Lake Tahoe each August where we have one Helluva great time talking football and the upcoming college football season and CHS members also help to shape the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings each week.

With that in mind let’s get to the business at hand which is the….

2017 Post Week One Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

…which means let’s bring out the Great Johnny Cash to give the coaches on the Hot Seat a wake-up call!

Thank You Mr. Cash and away we go on the 11 th season of Coaches Hot Seat

1.  Kevin Sumlin, Texas A&M – If you thought watching the Total Meltdown of Kevin Sumlin and the Texas A&M coaching staff in the Rose Bowl on Sunday night was nothing short of a Total Disaster then watching a replay of the game only makes things worse because one could take a look at each play and see mistake….after mistake….after mistake…after mistake by Sumlin and the Aggies Coaches that flat-out….

Robbed the A&M players of what should have been a win over UCLA!

It’s easy to look at the second-half of the A&M – UCLA game and point to many Beyond Stupid mistakes made by Kevin Sumlin and the A&M coaching staff, but the Idiocy actually began in the first quarter with the Aggies up 7 – 3 and the Bruins fumbling the ball and an A&M player returning it to the 3 yard line which was followed by A&M OC Noel Mazzone calling the following plays:

Fade to Left-Side of the End Zone
Fade to Right-Side of the End Zone
2 Yard Run to 1 Yard Line

Followed by a field goal putting the Aggies up 10 – 3 over UCLA.

Why didn’t Aggies OC Noel Mazzone just run the Damn ball right down the Bruins throat from the 3 yard line you ask when A&M was gashing the Bruins for over 7 yards a carry in the game?

Damn Good Question but this is just the beginning of the Damn Idiocy that was capped off in the second-half by what we hear at Coaches Hot Seat believe to be…

A Series of the Stupidest Coaching Decisions in the History of College Football in America

…which at Texas A&M dates back to 1894!

By now everyone that follows college football closely must know that Texas A&M went up by the score of….

Aggies – 44
Bruins – 10

…after a field goal with 4:08 left in the 3 rd quarter of the game. At this point there should have been NO CHANCE IN HELL of UCLA winning this football game unless Kevin Sumlin and the A&M coaches committed a series of blunders that would make the Stupidest Human Beings on the Earth look like Mensa members and guess what….that is exactly what happened!

Following the Aggies field goal to pt them up 44 – 10 over UCLA the Bruins then scored in 2 minutes to make the score 44 – 17 with 2:06 left in the 3 rd Quarter and this is what Kevin Sumlin and his offensive coaches did the rest of the game leading to one of the great meltdowns in college football history:

Aggies Remaining Offensive Plays in the Game after up 44 – 17:

1. Run for no gain
2. Run for 6 yards
3. Incomplete Pass
4. Punt

UCLA Touchdown and score is A&M 44 – UCLA 24

5. Run for 1 yard
6. Incomplete Pas
7. Run for 14 yards
8. Run for 3 yards
9. Run for 8 yards
10. Complete Pass
11. Sack loss of 10 yards
12. Run for 1 yard
13. Punt

UCLA Touchdown and score is A&M 44 – UCLA 31

14. Pass Complete
15. Run for 6 yards
16. Incomplete Pass
17. Run for 12 yards
18. Run for 7 yards
19. Run for loss 1 yard

With ball on 16 yard line and a made field goal making the score 47 – 31 or a two TD and two 2-point conversion game Aggies OC Noel Mazzone calls a pass play and….

20. Sack for loss of 9 yards

…which leads to a 43 yard field goal miss by the Aggies kicker instead of what should have been at most a 32 yard field goal if not shorter if Noel Mazzone had just RUN THE DAMN BALL on third down!

UCLA Touchdown and score is A&M 44 – UCLA 38

21. Run for 2 yards
22. Incomplete Pass
23. Sack for loss of 5 yards
24. Punt

UCLA Touchdown and score is A&M 44 – UCLA 45

The four plays in the last A&M series when the Aggies failed to get a first down are not that important because it was desperation time, but look the other plays above and see the Total Damn Idiocy especially when one realizes that at halftime A&M was averaging over….

6 Yards-Plus Per Run

….and in the second-half when the Aggies could have Stuff the Ball down the Bruins throats with their run game they not only called way Damn too many pass plays they also at the most critical time of the game when a made field goal would have at worst gotten the Aggies into overtime against UCLA a pass play was called with a true freshman QB on the field who not surprisingly took a big loss on a sack which led to a critical missed field goal and in our opinion….

This was level of Stupid Coaching that has not been seen in FBS Football since Charlie Weis was the head coach at Notre Dame!

In our opinion here at Coaches Hot Seat Kevin Sumlin did nothing less than GUT his own players by allowing his coaches to make one Stupid Damn Decision after another and for that he should have already been fired and the Aggies could have hired ANY high school coach on ANY level from ANYWHERE in the State of Texas and be the Aggies players would be getting better coaching today!

Let’s look at Kevin Sumlin’s records in six seasons at Texas A&M:

Overall: 44 – 22

SEC: 21 – 19

Against FBS Teams: 26 – 22

Against Group of 6 Teams: 12 – 0

Against FCS Teams: 6 – 0

Yep…take away the 18 Cupcakes that Keivn Sumlin has played and beat at A&M and we are talking about winning percentages of…

SEC: .525

Against FBS Teams: .542

…and for the above Very Average Records Kevin Sumlin has already been paid north of….

$25 Million Dollars

….and Texas A&M still owes Sumlin over $11 Million Dollars if they fired him today!

$35+ Million Dollars for a .542 record against FBS teams and .525 record in SEC play?

What kind of Damn Idiots are running Texas A&M University exactly?

Let’s not forget something else in this spot….

Last November at Kyle Field in College Station A&M led Ole Miss by 15 points entering the 4 th quarter before losing 29 – 28 and more to the point in Texas A&M last SIX games against FBS teams Kevin Sumlin’s record is…

0 – 6!

That’s right…Texas A&M has not beaten an FBS team since last October 8 when the Aggies beat Tennessee in double-overtime in College Station!

Luckily for Kevin Sumlin he is working at place….

Texas A&M University

…that embraces and celebrates AVERAGE and thus he can get away with winning percentages like…

.542 and .525

….and A&M has Nicholls and La. Lafayette to play at home in their next two games before playing Arkansas in Dallas on September 23 but then from Arkansas on it’s….

Arkansas (Dallas)
South Carolina
Alabama
At Florida
Mississippi State
Auburn
New Mexico
At Ole Miss
At LSU

…which to us looks like 7 or 8 wins for the Aggies in 2017 and based upon what the folks running Texas A&M have been willing to accept in the past maybe they will continue to accept…

Average

…now tied to the Complete Damn Stupidity of the UCLA game and the beat in College Station will go on for another year!

Be Proud Aggies…YOU are Average As Hell!

2.  Todd Graham, Arizona State – In the last two seasons at Arizona State Todd Graham has posted combined records of…

Overall: 11 – 14

Pac-12: 6 – 12

….and it seems clear from the noise coming out of Tempe that it’s going to probably take 8 wins plus in 2017 for Graham to be coaching the Sun Devils in 2018 and it wasn’t exactly a rousing start to this season in beating a very weak New Mexico State team 37 – 31, and if ASU plays like that the rest of the year there’s not a chance in Hell that Graham will be the head coach come December. Now at 1 – 0 on the year here is what ASU has left to play:

San Diego State
At Texas Tech
Oregon
At Stanford
Washington
At Utah
USC
Colorado
At UCLA
At Oregon State
Arizona

Can Todd Graham find 7 wins+ out of the Sun Devils remaining 11 games?

We don’t see it which means a very good job in Arizona State could be opening up come late November.

3.  Tony Sanchez, UNLV – The first time that anyone at Coaches Hot Seat ran into Tony Sanchez he was the head football coach at California High School in San Ramon, California which is in the East Bay of San Francisco and where Tony coached for five years before taking over and having a very successful run at Bishop Gorman High School in Las Vegas which led to him getting the UNLV job in 2015 which has led to the following records at UNLV after the disastrous opening season loss to the Howard University football team on Saturday night:

Overall: 7 – 18

MWC: 5 – 11

Those are not so great records for Tony Sanchez and the Rebels have left play this season….

At Idaho
At Ohio State
San Jose State
San Diego State
At Air Force
Utah State
At Fresno State
Hawaii
BYU
At New Mexico
At Nevada

…and it’s just a guess on our part with a new AD at UNLV on the job in Desiree Reed-Francois on the job who came over from Virginia Tech Sanchez is going to need 6-plus wins in 2017 to be the head coach of the Rebels in 2018, and if Sanchez can find 6 wins out of the above 11 remaining games he should return as the head coach at UNLV and get an extension on his contract as well!

4.  Mark Whipple, UMass – Since returning to coach at UMass in 2014 after an earlier stint coaching the Minutemen on the FCS level between 1998 – 2003 Mark Whipple has posted a record of…

Overall: 8 – 30

…over the last four seasons and an 0 – 2 start to 2017 with losses to Hawaii and Coastal Carolina doesn’t exactly give us confidence that Whipple will be the head coach at UMass when Santa shows up in late December!

What’s left for UMass this season:

Old Dominion – Loss
At Temple – Loss
At Tennessee – Loss
Ohio – Loss
At USF – Loss
Georgia Southern – Maybe Win
Appalachian State – Loss
At Mississippi State – Loss
Maine – Maybe Win
At BYU – Loss

That’s a 2 – 10 record at best in our minds for UMass in 2017 and more than likely a new head football coach for the Minutemen in 2018….in our humble opinion.

5.  Lance Leipold, Buffalo – Buffalo looked decent against Minnesota in the opening game of the season BUT in his third year on the job coaching the Bulls head coach Lance Leipold now has records of…

Overall: 7 – 18

MAC: 4 – 12

….on the board and we rather doubt that Leipold will be able to survive another losing season….but then this is Buffalo we are talking about and maybe Leipold can survive another sub .500 record and return to coach the Bulls again in 2018 which would be fine with us here at Coaches Hot Seat since we don’t have a dog in this fight or in any fight for that matter when it comes to Buffalo!

6.  Tom Herman, Texas – Earlier this year a couple of Coaches Hot Seat members were down in Austin for business plus fishing with our Texas-alum buddies and over a BBQ dinner we asked how the Tom Herman-era was going and one of those UT-alums said….

“You mean the Cult of Tom Herman?”

Coaches Hot Seat: “The Cult of Tom Herman? What the Hell does that mean?”

UT Alum: “It means that everything within the Texas Athletic Department is set-up to promote Tom Herman in the public instead of the Texas Football Team.”

Coaches Hot Seat: “That’s a change from the past?”

UT Alum: “You kidding? Mack Brown and Charlie Strong put the focus on the players….Tom Herman seems interested in only one thing…Tom Herman’s Precious Ass!”

Coaches Hot Seat: “Now that’s Damn interesting.”

UT Alum: “It is and there’s no explaining it even in Texas which is full of people with big egos….but I cannot recall running into or seeing anyone operate with a bigger ego than Tom Herman who seems to believe he invented the Sun, the Moon, and the Stars!”

Coaches Hot Seat: “It will be interesting to see how that will play out during the season.”

UT Alum: “Well right now with everything focused on kissing Tom Herman’s ass I fully expect Texas to lose the opening game to Maryland!”

Memo to Tom Herman:  Get Over Yourself Son or your head coaching tenure at Texas or anywhere else will be over before it really gets going. Oh…welcome to the Hot Seat Son!

Texas has PLENTY OF TALENT to win 8 games in 2017 with the below schedule remaining….

San Jose State
At USC
At Iowa State
Kansas State
Oklahoma
Oklahoma State
At Baylor
At TCU
Kansas
At West Virginia
Texas Tech

…and if Tom Herman expects to get his ass off the Hot Seat he better Damn win 8 games-plus this season!

7.  Brian Kelly, Notre Dame – Brian Kelly and the Irish got a nice win over a decent Temple team in Week 1 and now the 2017 season actually begins with a pretty good and very talented Georgia team coming to South Bend on Saturday evening. There’s a very good reason why Brian Kelly is on the Hot Seat and that is Kelly’s record over the past 5 seasons since Alabama BLASTED the Irish in the 2012-13 BCS National Title Game and that record is…

32 – 20 .615

…while averaging 7.75 wins per season and ANYTHING below 9 wins a season as head coach of Notre Dame your ass is AVERAGE and will place your ass on the…Yep…you got it…

Hot Seat!

We asked around with a few of our Notre Dame alum friends in the last few weeks how many wins that Brian Kelly needs to return to coach the Irish in 2018 and the consensus is…

10 wins-plus

….and we don’t think there is ANY chance of all of Notre Dame winning 10 games if the Irish lose to Georgia so Coach Hard Brian Kelly against the Dawgs!

8.  Chris Ash, Rutgers – Chris Ash’s Rutgers team played better against Washington they than the team played in almost any game in 2016 and now Ash will need to keep the improvement going in a HUGE and MUST WIN GAMES against Eastern Michigan at home on Saturday and then Morgan State on September 16 which would send the Scarlet Knights to Nebraska with a 2 – 1 record which would at least give Ash’s team some momentum and maybe his ass off the Hot Seat…or maybe not!

9.  Jim Mora, UCLA – We are not quite sure why the Hell the UCLA Bruins didn’t show up ready to play against Texas A&M on Sunday at the Rose Bowl but a Total Collapse by the Aggies plus a Bruins team that wouldn’t quit saved Mora from having the Hottest Seat in the America after Week 1 of the season and at least Jim Mora has that going for him!

Now at 1 – 0 on the season UCLA has left to play in 2017….

Hawaii
At Memphis
At Stanford
Colorado
At Arizona
Oregon
At Washington
At Utah
Arizona State
At USC
California

Damn…that’s a tough schedule and with Jim Mora needing at least 6 wins in 2017 to keep his job even with a MASSIVE buyout if fired it’s not going to be easy for UCLA to get to 6 wins unless they win their next 2 games to start at 3 – 0 before they head to The Farm to play Stanford on September 23.

10.  Bret Bielema, Arkansas – In 5 seasons at Arkansas Bret Bielema has the following records on the board…

Overall: 26 – 26

SEC: 10 – 22

…and that is what we would call Below Average for ANY Head Football Coach at Arkansas and we would recommend to both Bret Bielema and Arkansas AD Jeff Long that Bielema win at least 6 games in 2017 or both of them might find themselves out of a job come December which is why the next two games…

TCU
Texas A&M (Dallas)

…are MUST WIN GAMES before playing Cupcake New Mexico State on September 30 and then heading into the rest of the SEC schedule with a game at South Carolina.

If Arkansas does lose to TCU and Texas A&M to be at 2 – 2 at the end of September it’s not going to be easy to find 4 more wins among these last 8 games….

At South Carolina
At Alabama
Auburn
At Ole Miss
Coastal Carolina
At LSU
Mississippi State
Missouri

….with 6 wins total needed if Bielema wants to be employed in the State of Arkansas after December 2017!

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Gus Malzahn Is Sitting On One of the Hottest Seats in College Football Entering the 2016 College Football Season….and Should Be After What Was Nothing Less Than A Complete Freaking Disaster For Auburn Football In 2015! – Our Contact “Around” Auburn Lays Out the Reality That Now Faces Gus Malzahn AND Auburn AD Jay Jacobs = 2016 Is A Critical Year For BOTH Men! – Good Luck Gus!

April 22, 2016 0 Comments

 

OK…we West Coasters at Coaches Hot Seat will admit it…

We are loving us some SEC Football

….and since the late 1980s when a few Coaches Hot Seat members were serving in the US Navy in the Jacksonville, Florida area when a couple of us first ran into the Head Ball Coach Steve Spurrier at a Florida practice in Gainesville we have been lucky enough to have seen 100+ SEC football games in person, and there is not a more passionate place that loves their football more than at…

Auburn University!

JordanHare171717

Yes….the folks at Alabama love their football team BUT not more than the folks at Auburn love theirs and that is why there is so much distress these days on The Plains because the Mighty Alabama Crimson Tide under Nick Saban has won…

4 of the last 7 National Championships

NickSaban818181

….while Auburn has won what exactly?

ONE National Championship since 1957!

Yes…current Auburn head coach Gus Malzahn took the Auburn Tigers to the National Title Game in 2013 after what were nothing less than…

Two Luckier Than Hell Plays Against Georgia and Alabama at the end of the 2013 season

….BUT since Auburn lost to FSU in that 2013-14 Bogus BCS National Title Game one Gus Malzahn has put-up records of….

Overall:  15 – 11

SEC:  6 – 10

….over the last two seasons and we have some news for Gus Malzahn and his immediate family:

If there is not SIGNIFICANT improvement in the Auburn Tigers football team in 2016 Auburn will be looking for a new head football coach come December.

Now…we here at Coaches Hot Seat being good business folks or what they would call “bidness folks” in the South have always made a point of making lots of contacts during our business endeavors, and that approach has extended to the great game of college football during our 40-plus years of watching this great game, and we now have a group of contacts across college football that we believe rivals anyone….and we happen to have a GREAT contact “around” Auburn who we have been talking to a lot over the past 6 months on the status of one….Gus Malzahn.

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We recently talked again to our contact “around” Auburn and asked him straight-out:

Coaches Hot Seat:  “What does Gus Malzahn have to do in 2016 to keep his job at Auburn?”

Auburn Contact:  “Whoa now boys…no one said Gus Malzahn is about t o be fired…but I will say there is plenty of pink paper in the Auburn athletic offices at the ready if Malzahn and his football team don’t perform this season and a pink slip has to be delivered.”

Coaches Hot Seat:  “What the Hell does that mean?”

Auburn Contact:  “Well now boys….Jay Jacobs (the Auburn AD) thinks very highly of the Auburn football program and believes it should compete toe-to-toe with Alabama and other SEC heavyweights EVERY year and if Malzahn should have another 8, 7 or Heaven help us 6 win or less season then Jacobs will no doubt have a list of coaches at the ready to make a move later this year.”

Coaches Hot Seat:  “Any guesses who might be on Jay Jacobs short-list to replace a fired Gus Malzahn?”

Auburn Contact:  “Well boys…you didn’t hear this from me….but if you asked me to guess I would think Jay’s list would include…in order mind you…

Jimbo Fisher
Mark Dantonio
Art Briles
Gary Patterson
Dan Mullen
Tom Herman

Coaches Hot Seat:  “Geez…that’s a pretty strong list of coaches!”

Auburn Contact:  “Well boys….if Jay Jacobs has to fire a third head football coach (Tuberville, Chizik, Malzahn) since 2008 you can bet your bottom Dollar this time Jay will go big and be bringing a Heckuva lot of money with him…..meaning Saban-type money.”

Coaches Hot Seat:  “That would be $7 million dollars plus per season.”

Auburn Contact:  “Exactly….Auburn cannot make another mistake in hiring its next coach…that is if Jay Jacobs is given the chance to hire the next coach, because if Malzahn should someone not win 6 or more games in 2016 then Jay Jacobs may be fired right before Gus Malzahn is.”

Coaches Hot Seat:  “That would be carnage on The Plains.”

Auburn Contact:  “It would be carnage in the family….but sometimes a good housecleaning is needed and Auburn may need that is this season implodes under Gus (Malzahn).”

OK…it seems pretty clear to us that Gus Malzahn is sitting on one of the Hottest Damn Seats in College Football and should be with records the last two seasons at Auburn of…

Overall:  15 – 11

SEC:  6 – 10

….so let’s go the numbers and look at Auburn’s 2016 schedule.

Gus Malzahn, Auburn

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4 th season at South Carolina

Overall Head Coaching Record (Arkansas State + Auburn):  36 – 16

Auburn Head Coaching Record

Overall:  27 – 17

SEC:  13 – 11

Let’s look at Auburn’s 2016 football schedule:

Clemson
Arkansas State
Texas A&M
LSU
La. Monroe
At Mississippi State
Arkansas
At Ole Miss
Vanderbilt
At Georgia
Alabama A&M
At Alabama

BozoTheClown771177

OK….Bozo the Clown or ANY Damn Clown you can think of could win…

3 Football Games

….coaching Auburn in 2016 BUT as we look at the rest of Auburn’s schedule which begins with FIVE straight home games we are thinking that Gus Malzahn and his Auburn Tigers better Damn be NO worse than…

4 – 1

…when they travel to play at Mississippi State on October 8 because we see FOUR serious potential losses in Auburn’s last SEVEN games…

At Mississippi State
At Ole Miss
At Georgia
At Alabama

Here’s the problem for Gus Malzahn….in our opinion if Auburn finishes with a record worse than…

8 – 4 overall

5 – 3 in SEC play

….Gus Malzahn is going to be in a Helluva spot when the Alabama game is over on November 26 and if Auburn finishes at…

7 – 5 overall

4 – 4 in SEC play

….in 2016 which would leave Malzahn’s the last THREE seasons at Auburn standing at…

Overall:  22 – 16

SEC:  10 – 14

….then Gus Malzahn is….

DONE at Auburn…PERIOD!

Hell….with 3 games at home against Clemson, Texas A&M, and LSU in the first 5 weeks of the season Gus Malzahn could be DONE at Auburn before October 1 if the Tigers somehow tripped up and lost those 3 CRITICAL games!

Memo to Gus Malzahn:  Coach YOUR football team YOUR way in 2016 because there’s a very Damn good chance this will be YOUR last year at Auburn unless there is dramatic improvement from the Tigers football team of 2016 which in our opinion was nothing short of a…

Complete Freaking Disaster!

….because when you finish at…

2 – 6 in SEC play

….at Auburn that is just flat-out a…

Complete Freaking Disaster!

Good Luck Gus!

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