Tag Archive: USC

The Les Miles and Ron Turner Firings on Sunday – Post Week 4 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – These Hot Seat Coaches Need to Understand Mr. Cash That When You Make Millions of Dollars A Year…Your Ass Will Either Perform Or End Up On The Hot Seat! Give ‘Em Hell Johnny!

 

The Les Miles and Ron Turner Firings on Sunday

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Many of us here at Coaches Hot Seat were flying back to San Francisco from Los Angeles on Sunday after seeing Stanford come back and beat UCLA on Saturday night at the Rose Bowl and as we tweeted out on Sunday…

We were surprised but not shocked that LSU fired Les Miles

…because we believe Totally in the saying that now former Florida AD Jeremy Foley has said many times during his great career as AD in Gainesville…

“What will have to be done eventually should be done immediately.”

…and No Damn Doubt in our minds Les Miles should have been fired at the end of the 2016 season because in our opinion…

Les Miles is Incredibly Stubborn and would rather LSU Football lose football games than Miles EVER having to admit that he was wrong about ANYTHING

…and anyone with a working brain knows that Les Miles’ brand of football should be tossed on the scrapheap of college football history and anyone that is considering hiring Les Miles in the future should understand that reality Very Damn Clearly!

The Win/Loss Numbers for Les Miles over the past THREE seasons…2014 – 2016…are Very Damn Ugly Indeed when one considers that during the past THREE seasons Miles has had Top 5 talent in college football and those Win/Loss numbers are…

Overall:  19 – 10

SEC:  10 – 8

Power 5 Schools:  12 – 10

…which is nothing short of a Total and Complete Disaster when you have…

TOP FIVE TALENT in College Football at LSU

…which makes it in our opinion that LSU was 10 Months Late in firing Les Miles and in the end if might cost LSU….

Tom Herman to Texas or USC!

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Let’s leave the who will be the next head coach at LSU speculation for another day and give a Hearty Congratulations for Coach Ed Orgeron who is now the…

Head Football Coach at LSU

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…and who we hope can win many of the remaining games the Tigers have against…

Missouri
At Florida
Southern Miss
Ole Miss
Alabama
At Arkansas
South Alabama
At Texas A&M

…especially since LSU has MORE talent on its roster than every team left on its schedule except for Alabama.

One thing that Coach O said that caught our attention in his press conference on Monday was that LSU was going to…

“Spend less time on the practice field and more time in the meeting rooms.”

….which is what Pete Carroll did at USC and which as former football players here at Coaches Hot Seat is something we have believed in for 30+ years now going back to the Bill Walsh days at Stanford the first-time around.

As the great Alabama head coach Frank Thomas, who played for Knute Rockne at Notre Dame and coached Paul “Bear” Bryant at Alabama, once said:

“Keep the players high. Make practice a pleasure, not a lark. Be a disciplinarian, but not a slave driver. It’s better to have a short, full practice than a long lazy one.”

Amen to that Coach Thomas….and Coach O as well!

Give ‘Em Hell Coach O…and just like at USC…we will be pulling for you Coach!

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On the Ron Turner firing at FIU it was no surprise to anyone here at Coaches Hot Seat that Ron Turner was fired in his FOURTH season at FIU where he put up records of…

Overall:  10 – 30

CUSA:  7 – 17

….because as we said when Ron Turner was hired…

FIU had no Damn Business hiring Ron Turner because if you are going to fire Mario Cristobal then you better Damn hire someone better than Cristobal and Ron Turner is not in the same world as Cristobal in coaching college football in the early part of the 21 st century…..PERIOD!

FIU should hire a young, fiery, smart, tenacious, hard-charging, fighting like Hell coach and just realize if the coach does a good job at FIU he will probably be off to a bigger job and then FIU should go out and hire another….

Young, fiery, smart, tenacious, hard-charging, fighting like Hell coach!

Do that FIU….just do that!

 

Post Week 4 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

A chair on fire... metaphor "In The Hot Seat"

These Hot Seat Coaches Need to Understand Mr. Cash That When You Make Millions of Dollars A Year…Your Ass Will Either Perform Or End Up On The Hot Seat! Give ‘Em Hell Johnny!

Post Week 4 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

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1.  Clay Helton, USC – We spent several hours with an USC-alum friend of ours on this past Saturday night in Santa Monica after we watched Stanford come back and beat UCLA at the Rose Bowl and to say that our friend and many of his fellow USC-alum friends are PISSED-OFF about the current state of USC football would be a massive understatement!

Consider these numbers for a moment…since 2009 USC’s combined Pac-12 Conference record over the past 8 seasons now stands at…

40 – 25

…which includes USC head coaches Pete Carroll’s last year, Lane Kiffin, Ed Orgeron, Steve Sarkisian, and Clay Helton. Then consider the below numbers which is Alabama and Nick Saban’s record in SEC Conference play over the past 8 seasons…

48 – 8

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Why do we mention Nick Saban and Alabama’s record in SEC Conference play over the past 8 seasons you ask?

Because an USC-alum that could buy and sell most of the Westside of Los Angeles on any given afternoon has it written on a dry erase board in his home office and those two numbers….USC and Alabama’s conference records since 2009….was written on that dry erase board by someone who is fed-up with what is going on with USC football, and who is now going around Los Angeles briefing other USC alums about just what in the Hell is going to happen at USC if Clay Helton doesn’t get things turned around with the Trojans…and in a Helluva hurry!

Here are the important win/loss records at USC for Clay Helton as this moment:

Overall:  7 – 7

Pac-12:  5 – 3

The word we got from our USC-alum friend on Saturday night….

Clay Helton either wins 7 games in 2016…meaning USC will need to win 6 of its last 8 games this season…or the Clay Helton era at USC will be over shortly after the Notre Dame game on November 26.

Oh..Clay Helton better Damn beat UCLA and Notre Dame in getting those 7 wins!

Our opinion after talking to our USC-alum friend on Saturday night for a few hours:

Clay Helton better win 7-plus games or there is going to be a MEGA OFFER by USC to hire Tom Herman in 6 or so weeks that will make Herman the highest-paid coach in college football and with that in mind we would recommend that Helton’s Trojans beat Arizona State on Saturday night at the LA Coliseum!

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2.  Steve Addazio, Boston College – Steve Addazio’s Boston College team beat Total Damn Cupcake Wagner on Saturday which raised the Eagles overall record in 2016 to…

2 – 2

….which leaves Addazio’s win/loss records in four seasons at…

Overall:  19 – 23

ACC:  8 – 18

…and on Saturday BC plays host to Buffalo in a game that we would recommend Steve Addazio NOT lose because if the Eagles did lose to a Buffalo team at home then Addazio might not be the BC coach by Noon on Sunday!

It’s all very simple for Steve Addazio in 2016 IF Boston College can beat Buffalo on Saturday:

Win at least 6 games and Addazio will get another season at BC.

Don’t win at least 6 games and the Boston College job will open up in late November…if not sooner!

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3.  Charlie Strong, Texas – Our Texas-alum friends are NOT Stupid and after Texas got beat by what many of us think is just an average California team coupled with Notre Dame’s defense being more porous than a 3-year old sponge Charlie Strong is now in a very dangerous spot where Charlie will either win several critical games coming up or he might be out of a job before the 2016 season is half over.

The numbers or Charlie Strong at Texas are very mediocre…

Overall:  13 – 15

Big 12:  9 – 9

…and even though we think the world of Charlie and are hoping he can turn Texas back into a college football power the TRUTH is that Notre Dame’s Total Damn Collapse has turned up the heat on Strong who is facing TWO CRITICAL games in the next TWO weeks…

At Oklahoma State
Oklahoma

….that with TWO losses could very well lead to Charlie Strong being shown the door before the Longhorns play Iowa State on October 15.

Oh Yes…Charlie Strong is in a very precarious situation and from what we have been told…

“Anything less than 8 wins in 2016 and Charlie is done….PERIOD!”

….because the Texas boys with very deep pockets are not going to be left on the outside looking in on the Tom Herman sweepstakes and if a change in the head coaching job at Texas has to be made and USC is offering Tom Herman…

$8 Million A Year

…the Texas Boys will go with…

$9 Million A Year!

Our recommendation to Charlie Strong:

Beat Oklahoma State on Saturday Charlie and for God’s Sake…start playing some Damn Defense!

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4.  Tim DeRuyter, Fresno State – The numbers since Fresno State won the Mountain West Conference title for the second straight time in 2013 are very ugly indeed for Tim DeRuyter and his Bulldogs….since 2013 Fresno State’s records at…

Overall:  10 – 18

MWC:  7 – 13

…and a home loss to Tulsa in two overtimes on Saturday just made things that much worse and now it’s either…

Start Winning Some Football Games

…for Tim DeRuyter or there will be a new head football coach for Fresno State come sometime in December.

How many games does Tim DeRuyter need to win in 2016 to keep his job?

At least 6 games total Tim…at least 6 games.

Now at 1 – 3 on the season and these games still left to be played…

At UNLV
At Nevada
San Diego State
At Utah State
Air Force
At Colorado State
Hawaii
San Jose State

….can the Bulldogs win 5 of their last 8 games?

If they can’t then Tim DeRuyter NEEDS to be fired!

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5.  Paul Haynes, Kent State – With the Alabama whipping of Kent State on Saturday Paul Haynes record coaching the Golden Flashes over the last FOUR seasons now stands at…

Overall:  10 – 29

MAC:  6 – 17

…and with KSU now at 1 – 3 on the 2016 season either Haynes will get his team to 6 wins in 2016 or Kent State will be looking for a new head coach come December.

Next up for Paul Haynes and Kent State…

Akron and head coach Terry Bowden at home on Saturday!

Good Luck with that Paul!

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6.  Gus Malzahn, Auburn – We especially wanted to talk to some our Auburn friends after the Tigers close win over LSU on Saturday to get their opinions on the future of Gus Malzahn and it took until Tuesday afternoon to reach all of them and the general consensus among the Auburn alums we talked to is this…

Gus Malzahn will more than likely be back to coach at Auburn in 2017 IF the Tigers at least SEVEN games in 2016 and with that in mind and Auburn now sitting on a 2 – 2 record this season here is what AU have left to play:

La. Monroe
At Mississippi State
Arkansas
At Ole Miss
Vanderbilt
At Georgia
Alabama A&M
At Alabama

So Gus Malzahn has to win FIVE of his last EIGHT games to return as the Auburn coach in 2017 and he has…

TWO Total Damn Cupcakes in La. Monroe and Alabama A&M

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….so Malzahn has to win THREE of SIX games against…

At Mississippi State
Arkansas
At Ole Miss
Vanderbilt
At Georgia
At Alabama

Our opinion…if Gus Malzahn can’t win THREE of the above SIX games then he should be fired shortly after the Alabama game on November 26 because EVEN IF Malzahn finished at…

7 – 5

…in 2016 his win/loss records over the last THREE seasons…2014 – 2016….would stand at:

Overall:  22 – 16

SEC:  10 – 14

….and a coach at Auburn cannot possibly survive posting a record in SEC Conference play over three years of…

10 – 14

….right?

Hell…maybe the folks around and support Auburn Football are now willing to accept…

Average As Hell

….but then at Auburn a 10 – 14 SEC Conference record over three years isn’t even…

Average As Hell

….it’s MUCH WORSE!

Oh…if La. Monroe happened to beat Auburn on Saturday which is coached by Matt Viator who is a pretty Damn good football coach then we recommend the Alabama media pay close attention because we rather doubt that Gus Malzahn will be the head coach at Auburn by Noon on Sunday!

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7.  Will Muschamp, South Carolina – Some…make that Many…will say that it’s crazy to have Will Muschamp on the Hot Seat in his first year at South Carolina BUT we have a couple of close friends that are South Carolina alumni who have plenty of friends who were…

None Too Happy About Will Muschamp’s Hiring at USC

…and who are more than willing to throw their weight around if the 2016 season should turn into a…

Total and Complete Disaster for Muschamp at USC

….and if you can’t beat Kentucky….the 2016 season has the potential to turn into a…

Total and Complete Disaster for Muschamp at USC!

Now at 2 – 2 on the season Will Muschamp and South Carolina still have 8 games left against…

Texas A&M
Georgia
UMass
Tennessee
Missouri
At Florida
Western Carolina
At Clemson

…and we would recommend…and we are pulling for Will Muschamp….to win at least…

THREE of the last EIGHT games

…because if for some reason South Carolina finishes the 2016 season with wins only over…

Vanderbilt
East Carolina
UMass
Western Carolina

….we could recommend folks keep their eyes on Columbia come late November…just saying!

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8.  Brian Kelly, Notre Dame – One thing we tell our young employees is…

When you get into a position of power don’t be an Arrogant Ass

….because when you fail…and EVERYONE will fail at some time in their life….the people that sign your paychecks….

The Alumni, Boosters, and Fans of Notre Dame Football for Brian Kelly

….will be more likely to…

Kick Your Arrogant Ass to the Curb

…and that is what Brian Kelly is now facing if the 2016 season should turn into a Total and Complete Disaster after losses to Texas, Michigan State, and Duke to open the 2016 season.

Now at 1 – 3 the Non-Fighting Irish still have games against….

Syracuse
At NC State
Stanford
Miami
Navy
Army
Virginia Tech
At USC

….and it’s just a humble guess by the folks here at Coaches Hot Seat but we are thinking Notre Dame will win…

4….maybe 5…games in 2016

….and if Notre Dame wins 4…maybe 5…games in 2016…

Notre Dame will be looking for a new head football coach shortly after the USC game on November 26…

COUNT ON IT!

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9.  Darrell Hazell, Purdue – Darrell Hazell and his Purdue football team got a nice win at home over Nevada on Saturday which leaves Hazell’s records in FOUR seasons at the school at…

Overall:  8 – 31

Big Ten:  2 – 22

….and we have it on what we call Very Damn Good Authority that if Hazell wins less than 6 games in 2016 Purdue will be looking for a new head football coach shortly after the Indiana game on September 26!

Up next for Darrell Hazell and Purdue….at Maryland which has a first year coach in his first head coaching job which is a game that Purdue and Hazell SHOULD win but will they…

Not Bloody Likely!

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10.  Mark Stoops, Kentucky – We don’t know a whole lot of people around the University of Kentucky since we don’t follow college basketball like we do college football BUT we did reach what will call a “person of interest” in the Lexington area who told us on Monday of this week that…

“If Mark Stoops wins five games in 2016….Hell, maybe four games in 2016 he will be back to coach Kentucky next season.”

Geez…in your FOURTH year on the job at Kentucky you can win FOUR games and keep your job?

Well…this is Kentucky Football we are talking about here BUT with Kentucky now at 2 – 2 on the season and these games still to be played…

At Alabama
Vanderbilt
Mississippi State
At Missouri
Georgia
At Tennessee
Austin Peay
At Louisville

…can Mark Stoops and the Wildcats win just TWO of their last EIGHT games to save Mark Stoops job?

Now that is just Damn Silly that you can KEEP your job by winning TWO of your last EIGHT games but then can UK and Stoops even do that?

Maybe….Just Damn Maybe!

If Mark Stoops does win only 3 games in 2016…

Kentucky will be looking for a new head football coach shortly after Bobby Petrino and Louisville BEATS the Living Hell out of the Wildcats on November 26!

Post Week 3 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – It’s Early In The Season Yes…But That Doesn’t Mean Mr. Johnny Cash Isn’t Already Giving These Hot Seat Coaches Hell!

 

Post Week 3 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

A chair on fire... metaphor "In The Hot Seat"

It’s Early In The Season Yes…But That Doesn’t Mean Mr. Johnny Cash Isn’t Already Giving These Hot Seat Coaches Hell!

Post Week 3 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

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1.  Gus Malzahn, Auburn – The most shocking thing about the…

Fall of Gus Malzahn at Auburn

…is how Fast + Far the Fall has been and if one goes back to Saturday, October 4, 2014 which is the day that Auburn beat LSU at home by the score of…

41 – 7

….over the past two-plus seasons Gus Malzahn has posted TWO records that are nothing less than a…

Total and Complete Disaster at Auburn!

In Gus Malzahn’s Last 18 games against Power 5 Conference Schools his win/loss record is…

5 – 13

….and in Gus Malzahn’s Last 15 SEC Conference Games his win/loss record is…

4 – 11

Sorry….NO Coach can survive those kinds of records at Auburn and that means the BIGGEST game of Gus Malzahn’s coaching career is this coming Saturday night at home against an LSU team that is wobbling as well and also has a coach on the Hot Seat in Les Miles because very simply….

Gus Malzahn CANNOT Lose to LSU at home on Saturday night!

According to Tyler Thompson at Kentucky Sports Radio who did a nice breakdown of the current buyouts in the SEC…

Comparing Mark Stoops’ buyout to the rest of the SEC, Tyler Thompson, Kentucky Sports Radio

….Gus Malzahn’s buyout if fired at the end of the 2016 season would be…

$8.95 Million Dollars

….which is Beyond Damn Absurd although not as Absurd as the $12 Million Dollars that Kentucky would owe Mark Stoops if fired, and if we were in a position of power at Auburn University right now we would be wondering?

Who in the Hell is hiring and signing these Beyond Damn Absurd contracts with Auburn Head Football Coaches that would if Gus Malzahn is fired after this season lead to Auburn paying out…

North of $20 Million Dollars to buyout Tommy Tuberville, Gene Chizik and Gus Malzahn!

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That would be Auburn AD Jay Jacobs who is a Helluva nice man and talented college athletic sports administrator but unfortunately it seems that Jay like many ADs in FBS today have…

No Damn Respect for other people’s money meaning the Fans, Boosters, Alumni and anyone else that spends their hard-earned money on Auburn Football and Athletics!

Our opinion on the Auburn situation: If Auburn can’t beat what is a Very Average LSU team at home on The Plains the Tigers will be lucky to win…

6 Games in 2016!

Yes…it’s that bad at Auburn and someone at Auburn better have a Damn plan in place if the 2016 season melts down in the coming weeks!

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2.  Steve Addazio, Boston College – Let this sink in for a moment…

In Steve Addazio’s 41 st game at Boston College in his FOURTH season on the job his BC football team just got beat…

49 – 0

….by a team in Virginia Tech with a first-year head coach in Justin Fuente who took over a Hokies team that won SIX games in the 2015 regular season!

There is NO DAMN EXCUSE for Steve Addazio to take a team to Blacksburg and lose 49 – 0 to what is still a finding-its-way Virginia Tech team and with that loss Steve Addazio’s records at BC dropped to…

Overall:  18 – 23

ACC:  8 – 18

….and over the last two seasons Steve Addazio is now sitting on a record of…

4 – 11!

Geez….you think things are coming apart at Boston College with the Eagles next REAL game after playing Cupcakes Wagner and Buffalo in the next two weeks being Clemson at home?

Yes…things are coming apart at Boston College and the word on the street in Boston where it seems BC-alums are finally coming to their senses before their football program goes in the totally in the toilet…

Anything less than 6 wins in 2016 and Steve Addazio is DONE come late November.

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3.  Darrell Hazell, Purdue – Purdue has a bye in Week 3 and gets back to playing with a home game against Nevada on Saturday in a game that flat-out…

Darrell Hazell CANNOT Lose

….because a loss to Nevada to drop to 1 – 2 on the season with NINE Big Ten games left to play would be…

Forget Turning Out the Lights Because There is No Damn Electricity

….for the Purdue Boilermakers in 2016!

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4.  Clay Helton, USC – It hasn’t been easy to reach our USC-alum friends especially as they let sink in that..

Stanford has won EIGHT of the last TEN games against USC

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….but we did get what we will call a Very Damn Influential USC-alum on the phone on Monday morning at his office overlooking the Pacific Ocean in Santa Monica and here is what he said about Clay Helton when asked…

“Clay Helton is a nice man but anything less than NINE wins this season and it’s over for Clay. We know (meaning USC-alums) we will have to raise a lot of money to get someone like Tom Herman, but we are determined to make USC football relevant again whatever the cost may be.”

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With the above in mind USC plays at Utah on Saturday and with a loss Clay Helton’s overall record coaching the Trojans would drop to…

7 – 7

…and we recommend to Clay Helton that…

Your Trojans BEAT Utah Son!

Oh…what is a “lot of money” in the mind of a Very Damn Influential USC-alum to hire someone like Tom Herman you ask?

$10M A Year meaning the Highest Paid Coach in College Football!

Yep…USC-alums are not happy and they are willing to take out their checkbooks to show just how unhappy they are with the current state of USC Football!

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5.  Les Miles, LSU – Talk about what would be nothing less than a…

Total and Complete Disaster

…what if Les Miles LSU team went to Auburn this coming Saturday night and lost to Auburn team that looks like it has No Damn Clue what stadium it is playing in?

Oh that would be a…Total and Complete Disaster…which is why this Saturday’s LSU vs. Auburn game is one of those….

A CANNOT Lose Game for both Les Miles and Gus Malzahn

…with the losing coach being taken straight to Cape Kennedy after the game to be put on a rocket to launch him and his ass Straight Towards the Face of the Sun!

OK…we have seen LSU play against Wisconsin, Jacksonville State, and Mississippi State this year and the Tigers looked like a very AVERAGE football team in all three games and if one looks at what is left on LSU’s schedule…

At Auburn
Missouri
At Florida
Southern Miss
Ole Miss
Alabama
At Arkansas
South Alabama
At Texas A&M

…how many games can Les Miles and his football team realistically win in 2016?

We say…no more than EIGHT games and anything less than TEN wins and Les Miles is done come December and if LSU fans want to hire Tom Herman or Bobby Petrino for that matter they better like our USC-alum friends be ready to…

Write Some BIG Checks!

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6.  Ron Turner, Florida International – With the FIU loss to UMass on Saturday head coach Ron Turner’s records at FIU now stand at…

Overall:  10 – 29

CUSA:  7 – 17

….an do we need to write any more about Ron Turner at FIU?

NO is the answer to that question!

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7.  Mark Stoops, Kentucky – At first we thought it was an Internet Joke that Kentucky head coach Mark Stoops had a…

$12 Million Dollar Buyoutat Kentucky but as Tyler Thompson has shown doing some great research…

Comparing Mark Stoops’ buyout to the rest of the SEC, Tyler Thompson, Kentucky Sports Radio

…that $12 Million Dollar buyout DO BE TRUE which again shows that another AD…this time Kentucky AD Mitch Barnhart…doesn’t…

Know His Ass From the Side of a Barn

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….because when Mark Stoops was given this Totally Damn Absurd Contract and Buyout…

Mark Stoops had done NOTHING to have earned such a RICH payout

…but then don’t feel bad Mitch Barnhart…

College Athletics is riddled with Total Damn Complete Moron ADs that seem to love giving away Other People’s Hard-Earned Money!

With Kentucky’s come from behind win over woeful New Mexico State on Saturday Mark Stoops records at UK now stand at…

Overall:  13 – 26

SEC:  4 – 21

….and with these games still left on the Wildcats schedule…

South Carolina
At Alabama
Vanderbilt
Mississippi State
At Missouri
Georgia
At Tennessee
Austin Peay
At Louisville

….we don’t see Kentucky winning more than…

FOUR Games in 2016

…and even though Kentucky would owe Mark Stoops the Totally Damn Absurd…

$12 Million Dollars

…if fired after the season how could Kentucky keep on a head football coach that won…

FOUR Games in his FOURTH season on the job?

They COULD NOT is the answer to that question!

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8.  Charlie Strong, Texas – A few Coaches Hot Seat members were at the Texas – Cal game at Memorial Stadium on Saturday night and the word they brought back to us on Sunday was that….

Texas let the Cal wide-receivers run wild and didn’t pressure the Bears QB

…and if you allow that to happen with ANY spread-passing offensive attack as Cal…and many Big 12 schools now run….you are going to give up a Helluva LOT of points and…

Giving up 50 Points to Cal when Cal only scored 51 on woeful Hawaii and only 40 on San Diego State

…is not only Not Freaking Acceptable is it borderline a Firing Offense when you are in your THIRD season on the job as Charlie Strong is at Texas.

The Problem that Charlie Strong is now facing is that many schools in the Big 12 play an offense just like Cal’s and Charlie better get the Texas Defense fixed and quick because look what’s coming up for the Horns…

At Oklahoma State
Oklahoma
Iowa State
At Kansas State
Baylor
At Texas Tech
West Virginia
At Kansas
TCU

Hell…if Texas plays like they did against Cal the rest of the season the Horns will win….

FIVE…Maybe SIX Games in 2016 and if that happens…

Charlie Strong will NOT be the head coach at Texas come December….PERIOD!

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9.  Tim DeRuyter, Fresno State – Since Tim DeRuyter and his Fresno State football team won the Mountain West Conference in 2013 his Bulldogs have posted records over the past three seasons of…

Overall:  10 – 19

MWC:  7 – 9

…and the proud folks that support Fresno State football are just NOT going to tolerate that kind of football for much longer and thus why Tim DeRuyter better get things turned around in the Valley or he will be out of a job at the end of this season.

Now at 1 – 2 on the season and looking at what is left on Fresno State’s schedule in 2016…

Tulsa
At UNLV
At Nevada
San Diego State
At Utah State
Air Force
At Colorado State
Hawaii
San Jose State

…there is NO reason for the Bulldogs to win less than…

SEVEN Games in 2016

…and SEVEN Wins in 2016 is probably what DeRuyter needs to keep his job at Fresno State!

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10.  Paul Haynes, Kent State – Hey, Hey, Hey…Kent State and head coach Paul Haynes got a win on Saturday against Monmouth which is enough to temper much of the enthusiasm for the win….especially when one sees who the Golden Flashes are playing next…

Alabama in Tuscaloosa!

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Uhhhh…Good Luck with that Paul Haynes!

Paul Hayne’s win/loss records in FOUR seasons at Kent State:

Overall:  10 – 28

MAC:  6 – 17

Make that 10 – 29 with the Crimson Tide looming!

Impressions From Stanford – USC Game – Post Week 3 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 11 – 30 Hot Seat Coaches – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash and Make Them Cry Like Babies!

 

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We wanted to hear from everyone that attended the Stanford – USC game on Saturday at the Coaches Hot Seat Monday Night Football get-together at the four Coaches Hot Seat Centrals last night and the consensus on Stanford football after much discussion is:

Stanford football was fired-up and ready to play USC on Saturday night and they were dead asleep when they ran onto the field against Northwestern in Week 1. No doubt, USC is an opponent that should get Stanford football players more fired-up than Northwestern, but the difference in play in the two games is striking….so striking in fact that there is now some real worry that the Cardinal will not show up on Friday night at Oregon State with the same passion and enthusiasm that they displayed against USC. Yes, that is REAL Damn worry and with a handful of Coaches Hot Seat members traveling to Corvallis for the game on Friday night there is no doubt this is a critical game for Stanford head coach David Shaw who is….

10 – 7 in his last 17 games at Stanford

AND

6 – 4 in his last 10 Pac-12 games at Stanford

NCAA Football: Wake Forest at Stanford

Here is Stanford’s remaining schedule:

At Oregon State
Arizona
UCLA
Washington
At Washington State
At Colorado
Oregon
California
Notre Dame

IF Stanford plays at or close to the same level of play and passion they played against USC there is No Damn Reason why the Cardinal loses more than…

3 Games in 2015

…but if the level of play and/or passion declines at all Stanford could easily lose 5 or more games in 2015 which would be nothing short of a…

Complete Freaking Disaster on The Farm!

With that let’s get to the….

Post Week 3 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 11 – 30 Hot Seat Coaches

A chair on fire... metaphor "In The Hot Seat"

Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash and Make Them Cry Like Babies!

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11.  Ron Caragher, San Jose State – Ron Caragher took over a San Jose State team that had won 10 games in 2012 under Mike MacIntyre and Caragher has posted the following records now in his third season on the job:

Overall:  10 – 17

MWC:  7 – 10

Sorry Ron, the above win/loss records do not feed the Bulldog…even at San Jose State…and it’s either put-up or shut-up the rest of the 2015 season and luckily for Ron and the Spartans they have three very Damn winnable games coming up against…

Fresno State
At Auburn
At UNLV

Hell, we see no reason why San Jose State isn’t…

4 – 2

…when they play San Diego State on October 17!

Coach ‘em up Ron!

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12.  Derek Mason, Vanderbilt – Vanderbilt got its first win of the 2015 season for head coach Derek Mason on Saturday over Austin Peay and that runs Mason’s records to the following in his second year on the job:

Overall:  4 – 11

SEC:  0 – 9

We have been trying for weeks to get something out of one of our long-time doctor friends who got his medical degree from Vanderbilt on what Derek Mason needs to do in 2015 to return as the head coach of the Commodores next season and finally the Doc took some time from his busy schedule saving folks lives to tell us…

“Who is Derek Mason? Hell, when did James Franklin leave Vandy? Just kidding boys! Thinking Mason needs 4 wins this season and which means 2 wins in SEC play assuming Vandy beats Middle Tennessee and loses to Houston. Hey, it’s not a big goal but remember boys….this is Vandy football we are talking about here!”

So Derek Mason needs to find three more wins out of the below games to improve on his 3 – 9 record in 2014 to return as the head coach of Vandy in 2016…..Hmmmm…..

At Ole Miss
At Middle Tennessee
At South Carolina
Missouri
At Houston
At Florida
Kentucky
Texas A&M
At Tennessee

Good Luck with that Derek Mason!

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13.  Butch Jones, Tennessee – For all the bluster of Butch Jones since he arrived in Knoxville in early 2013 in the wake of the Complete Freaking Disasters that were the hirings of Lane Kiffin and Derek Dooley the TRUTH is that Butch Jones has now coached 28 games at Tennessee and has posted a record of…

14 – 14

….and Derek Dooley’s record after 28 games in the books coaching the Vols was…

13 – 15

….which makes this Saturday’s game at Florida the BIGGEST game of Butch Jones coaching career because a loss in this spot and the now Run Out of Knoxville on a Rail Derek Dooley and Butch Jones will stand at the same exact spot record wise after 29 games in the books…

14 – 15!

Let’s take a look at the rest of Tennessee’s schedule with the Vols now sitting at 2 – 1:

At Florida
Arkansas
Georgia
At Alabama
At Kentucky
South Carolina
North Texas
At Missouri
Vanderbilt

In 2014 Tennessee finished the regular season at 6 – 6 and looking over the above remaining games we only see two SURE WINS…North Texas and Vanderbilt….so can Butch Jones and the Vols who threw away a great opportunity to be on an amazing roll if they had not given away the Oklahoma game find at least 6 more wins to get to 8 wins total in 2015 which we believe is the win number Butch Jones MUST hit if he doesn’t want 2015 to be considered…

A Complete and Total Failure?

Don’t know the answer to that question but Butch Jones better Damn find 6 more wins starting with a win over the Florida Gators in Gainesville on Saturday or the HEAT on Butch Jones’ ass come next Monday will rival the HEAT that was on Derek Dooley’s ass just a few years ago!

14.  Trent Miles, Georgia State – On Saturday Georgia State played the Oregon Ducks in Autzen…final score…

Oregon – 61
Georgia State – 28

…and that now runs Trent Miles win/loss records at Georgia State in his third year on the job to…

Overall:  2 – 25

Sun Belt:  1 – 15

Got a Roaring Hot Seat with a side of butter? Trent Miles does and that butter must be scolding!

15.  Paul Petrino, Idaho – Since Paul Petrino now has THREE wins in THREE seasons coaching the Idaho Vandals ANY win is a cause for celebration and on Saturday Idaho beat Wofford 41 – 38 which runs Petrino’s win/loss record at Idaho to…

3 – 23

Up next for Idaho which only beat Wofford by THREE points…

Georgia Southern

Good Luck with that Paul Petrino and Oh Yea…Your Ass Is Still On the Hot Seat even with that MIGHTY THREE point win over Wofford!

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16.  Kevin Wilson, Indiana – Kevin Wilson’s Indiana team got their MUST WIN over Western Kentucky on Saturday to run the Hoosiers record to…

3 – 0

….in 2015 and now only Wake Forest stands in the way of Indiana entering Big Ten play undefeated which is against Ohio State on October 3.

Uh….Oh….this Wake Forest game is the exact kind of spot where Indiana under Kevin Wilson has faltered in the past and why Wilson needs to make sure his Hoosiers are focused as they travel down to North Carolina to take on Wake.

There is only ONE way for Kevin Wilson to get off the Hot Seat…

Get his Hoosiers to 6 wins in 2015 and a win over Wake Forest on Saturday will go a long way in accomplishing that goal!

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17.  Mike Riley, Nebraska – Nebraska played well enough to be 3 – 0 right now instead of 1 – 2 after close losses to BYU and Nebraska which reminds us of something one of our football coaches from a long time ago used to say when people told him that it was too bad that his team lost a close game:

“It never should have been a close game in the first place!”

We are talking about Nebraska here which hasn’t won less than NINE games since the 2007 season and with Cornhuskers now at 1 – 2 with the below games remaining how many games can Mike Riley and Nebraska win in 2015?

Southern Miss
At Illinois
Wisconsin
At Minnesota
Northwestern
At Purdue
Michigan State
At Rutgers
Iowa

Why do we think that Nebraska is going to have a tough time getting to 8 wins in 2015?

Geez….this could be a long football season in Lincoln for Mike Riley!

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18.  Norm Chow, Hawaii – Hawaii beat UC Davis on Saturday night to move to 2 – 1 on the season which means about as much as the wave that just hit the beach at Waikiki and now it’s back to the REAL world for the Warriors as they travel in back-to-back weeks to play…

At Wisconsin
At Boise State

Good Luck with that Norm!

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19.  Steve Sarkisian, USC – The most interesting comment made by a Coaches Hot Seat member made after seeing Stanford maul USC at the LA Coliseum on Saturday night was…

“This USC team looks like Sark’s Washington teams with just more talent.”

Our problem with Pat Haden hiring Steve Sarkisian as the head coach at USC was that Sark’s teams at Washington were often just “OK” and that if Sarkisian was going to take USC back to the heights seen during the Pete Carroll era with the Trojans then “something” was going to have to be added to Sark’s coaching repertoire and so far in Sark’s second season at USC…

We just don’t see that “something” yet.

Since many of us here at Coaches Hot Seat have been watching USC football for close to 40 years now our standards for USC and thus Steve Sarkisian are Very Damn High and with the loss to Stanford the Trojans dropped to 2 – 1 on the season with these games remaining to be played:

At Arizona State
Washington
At Notre Dame
Utah
At California
Arizona
At Colorado
Oregon
UCLA

Can USC and more importantly Steve Sarkisian top their win total of EIGHT games in 2014?

Maybe….Maybe Not…which is why things are starting to heat up for Steve Sarkisian at USC who has Very Damn Little margin for error on or off the field!

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20.  Ron Turner, Florida International – Ron Turner and FIU got their CUPCAKE win over NC Central on Saturday to move to 2 – 1 on the season but it’s back to Big Boy football in Week 4 with a trip to play at La. Tech which took Kansas State to overtime on Saturday.

Got 2 – 2 Ron Turner and FIU?

You are about to have it and for Damn sure Ron your ass is on the Hot Seat!

Post Week 3 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 21 – 30 Hot Seat Coaches Analysis Coming Soon!

Post Week 2 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 21 – 30 Hot Seat Coaches – Keep Giving These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

Keep Giving These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Mr. Cash!

A chair on fire... metaphor "In The Hot Seat"

Post Week 2 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

NCAA Football: Wake Forest at Stanford

21.  David Shaw, Stanford – As a dozen or so Coaches Hot Seat members sat in Stanford Stadium on Saturday night watching Stanford whip Hapless and it seemed almost Coachless UCF an interesting observation was made by one CHS member:

“Is it just me or do the Stanford football players seem to going back to the size physically they were (which was puny) when Walt Harris was run off The Farm and replaced with Jim Harbaugh in 2007?”

This idea that the Stanford football players are getting increasingly smaller under head coach David Shaw compared to the size they were under Jim Harbaugh and in the first couple of years of the Shaw reign has been a topic of hushed discussion for over a year now among a small group of Coaches Hot Seat members which blew-up into a wide ranging discussion on Saturday night with lots of comments thrown in from the peanut gallery like…..

“How small the Stanford football players seemed at fan day in August. Hell, my boy in the ninth grade was bigger than half the Stanford team!”

“How it seems the Stanford football players are losing rather than gaining weight year-over year under David Shaw.”

“Doesn’t it seem like the Stanford football players are less cut, less in shape looking and overall not in the condition they were in during the Jim Harbaugh years?”

What was the final conclusion to this discussion you ask among the participating Coaches Hot Seat members which included a couple of CHS Members chiming-in from their hotel room in Knoxville, Tennessee?

Stanford football IS GETTING SMALLER and LESS PHYSICAL overall under David Shaw and all it takes for one to understand this FACT is for anyone to watch a tape of the Northwestern game from this season to see a smaller team in Northwestern push Stanford around all over the field on the way to a 16 – 6 win over the Cardinal.

Of course, the proof is ALWAYS in the pudding as someone once said and this week Stanford plays at USC which has ALWAYS had larger and stronger players across the board than Stanford but for a few seasons during the Jim Harbaugh years there was a time when USC was flat-out…

Intimidated by Stanford Football

….which culminated in 2009 Stanford – USC game at the LA Coliseum when the Cardinal led Jim Harbaugh team CRUSHED the Trojans by the score of…

55 – 21!

Unfortunately USC has won the last two games in the Stanford – USC series and it will be fascinating to see what the Trojans are able to do with Stanford at the LA Coliseum on Saturday in Steve Sarkisian’s second year as the head coach at USC after narrowly beating the Cardinal 13 – 10 last season on The Farm.

Will Stanford get pushed around by a team in USC that has five to six times as much talent as Northwestern which thoroughly dominated Stanford in the first game of the season or is there something…..anything….that David Shaw can do to get the Cardinal offense on track before the Pac-12 schedule really cranks up with several teams on the schedule that can easily score 30 or more points a game which would leave the pitiful Stanford offense in the dust?

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We shall all see on Saturday night with a decent amount of Coaches Hot Seat members traveling to Los Angeles for the Stanford – USC game at one of our favorite venues to watch football games the LA Coliseum which a few Coaches Hot Seat members have been watching football games at for almost 40 years now. Needless to say with the remaining games on Stanford’s schedule as listed below…

At USC
At Oregon State
Arizona
UCLA
Washington
At Washington State
At Colorado
Oregon
California
Notre Dame

….there is a REAL chance that Stanford does NOT win 6 games in 2015 if they play like they did against Northwestern and of course if Stanford doesn’t win 6 games in 2015 Stanford WILL be looking for a new head football coach come December for Damn sure!

22.  Curtis Johnson, Tulane – Curtis Johnson is now in his fourth season coaching the Tulane Green Wave and has posted win/loss records of…

Overall:  12 – 27

CUSA:  9 – 15

….with ONE winning season and bowl game in the books in his first three seasons.

Is Tulane the kind of place that should expect to be playing .500 or better football on a regular basis?

We sure the Hell don’t know why not and after Tulane started the 2015 season with losses to Duke and Georgia Tech the Green Wave has these games left on the schedule:

Maine
UCF
At Temple
Houston
At Navy
At Memphis
UConn
At Army
At SMU
Tulsa

Hmmm…..with the above games remaining is there anyone that believes Tulane will win at least 6 games in 2015?

Didn’t think so which takes us to…

Coach up your team Curtis Johnson or the Hot Seat will just get HOTTER!

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23.  Kliff Kingsbury, Texas Tech – What a PERFECT opportunity Saturday is for…

Pretty Boy Kingsbury

….to both get Coaches Hot Seat off his back, have us drop the Pretty Boy Kingsbury moniker FOREVER, and get a win for Texas Tech football when the Red Raiders travel to Fayetteville on Saturday to play an Arkansas team that is coming off a loss to Toledo and is according to our buddies in Ft. Smith, Arkansas…

In Total and Complete Disarray Right Now

….with people in Fayetteville pointing fingers at who was responsible for the Toledo loss and therein lies the…

PERFECT opportunity for Pretty Boy Kingsbury and his Red Raiders!

Can Texas Tech really go into Fayetteville and beat an Arkansas team coached by someone (Bret “Ohio State LOVES THEIR CUPCAKES” Bielema) who it seems is more interested in who Ohio State is playing each week (Northern Illinois) than in getting his team ready to play football games?

YES is that answer to that question and a loss in this spot for Bret Bielema to Texas Tech would not only get Pretty Boy Kingsbury OFF the Hot Seat it would send Bret “Anyone seen Urban Meyer eating CUPCAKES today” Bielema into a close orbit around the Sun for the foreseeable future with the SEC Conference schedule still ahead!

Memo to Pretty Boy Kingsbury:  If you score 35 points in this game you will beat Arkansas and YES if you beat Arkansas on Saturday we will drop the Pretty Boy Kingsbury moniker FOREVER! Signed: Coaches Hot Seat

Good Luck Pretty Boy!

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24.  Les Miles, LSU – With wins over Mississippi State AND Auburn Les Miles has an opportunity to go from the frying pan to the catbird seat if LSU can get a win over a Totally Hapless Auburn team in Baton Rouge on Saturday and consider this for a moment that IF LSU can beat Auburn the Tigers will then have the below games left on their schedule before they play at Alabama on November 7:

At Syracuse
Eastern Michigan
At South Carolina
Florida
Western Kentucky

Hell, if LSU can beat Mississippi State and Auburn we see no reason why LSU can’t roll through their next FIVE games and show up in Tuscaloosa on November 7 at….

7 – 0

….to play the Crimson Tide BUT hold it just a second…after Alabama the Tigers still have to play…

Arkansas
At Ole Miss
Texas A&M

….so even if LSU was 7 – 0 on November 7 Les Miles could still lose his last 4 games and end the 2015 season at…

7 – 4

….and rightfully get his ass run out of Baton Rouge come December!

Up first though before Les Miles possibly gets his ass run out of Baton Rouge in December is the Auburn Tigers in Tiger Stadium and don’t tell anyone Les because what we are about to tell you is just between you Les and us here at Coaches Hot Seat:

Coaches Hot Seat whispering through the computer to Les Miles:  “Our contact at Auburn tells us the Auburn coaching staff is in full-on panic mode right now because they know and Gus Malzahn knows that if Auburn loses to LSU on Saturday and Malzahn drops to 10 – 7 in his last 17 games that Malzahn’s ass will be on fire and on the Hot Seat!”

Good Luck Mad Hatter and OH…if you lose to Auburn at home in Tiger Stadium when Auburn is in “full-on panic mode” your precious ass will be climbing back up the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings!

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25.  Dana Holgorsen, West Virginia – Dana Holgorsen and West Virginia got their CUPCAKE win on Saturday over Liberty University which is where that Total Nutcake Bernie Sanders was speaking on Monday but we will say about Bernie Sanders that even though he is a Total Nutcake at least he is a Total Nutcake with personal principles that he sticks to whether you disagree with him or not!

Getting back to Dana Holgorsen and West Virginia Crazy Boy Holgorsen has a chance to get his ass off the Hot Seat next week with a win against Maryland at home on September 26 which would be nice since WVU travels to play at Oklahoma in their fourth game of the season after the Terps come to Morgantown.

For now though with West Virginia having an off-week Crazy Boy Dana Holgorsen remains on the Hot Seat right where Crazy Boy belongs!

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26.  Kirk Ferentz, Iowa – Kirk Ferentz and Iowa got a nice win at Iowa State on Saturday but then…

Iowa State has LOST 21 of their last 26 games

…so beating Iowa State is akin to beating a Ladies Senior Citizen Bridge Club’s auxiliary football team that meets on every Tuesday night in a suburb of Des Moines, Iowa so we hope that fans of Iowa football aren’t getting too confident after a win over the Cyclones especially with Pitt coming to town on Saturday.

We will tell everyone why a loss to Pitt on Saturday would be especially devastating to Kirk Ferentz and Iowa:

Pat Narduzzi is in his first year as a head coach at Pitt or as a head coach anywhere and if Pat Narduzzi can in his third game as a head coach roll into Iowa and beat the Hawkeyes on the road where exactly does that leave Iowa football under Kirk Ferentz?

Right in the septic tank on the farm is where that leaves Iowa football under Kirk Ferentz!

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27.  Mike Riley, Nebraska – Several Coaches Hot Seat members have been traveling to the Great State of Nebraska for over two decades on business and thus we have had a long love affair going with Nebraska and the Good People of that state and even when we put Mike Riley on the Hot Seat we have done so reluctantly since Mike Riley is a lot like the Good People of Nebraska in that Riley is almost…

Impossible NOT to like

….but this is Coaches Hot Seat and when you are the head coach at Nebraska you have to win “X” number of games to stay OFF the Hot Seat and thus why this Saturday’s game at Miami is so Damn important for Mike Riley and Nebraska football as they head towards Big Ten Conference play.

Of course, this Nebraska – Miami game is also very important for Hurricanes head coach Al Golden and thus we have set-up here in South Florida a..

Hot Seat vs. Hot Seat Coaching Match-Up

….with the winning coach getting his ass off the Hot Seat for now and the losing coaching getting the heat turned up on his ass Come Monday….

….and no doubt many times in the future during the rest of this college football season as well.

Good Luck to Mike Riley and Al Golden in this Hot Seat vs. Hot Seat Coaches game!

28.  Mike MacIntyre, Colorado – Mike MacIntyre and Colorado got a nice win over UMass at home in Boulder on Saturday and now the Buffs face a CRITICAL game against Colorado State on Saturday which is a match-up that Colorado MUST WIN with the Pac-12 conference schedule looming over their shoulders and with the first Pac-12 game against Oregon in Boulder on October 3.

Can Colorado beat Colorado State on Saturday to get Mike MacIntyre off to a 2 – 1 start with Nicholls State up next which should be 3 – 1 before the Buffs start Pac-12 play against Oregon on October 3?

We don’t see why the Hell not!

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29.  Larry Fedora, North Carolina – Larry Fedora and North Carolina got a win over CUPCAKE North Carolina A&T on Saturday and now getting back to Big Boy College Football UNC will host Illinois on Saturday in Chapel Hill which is being coached by interim head coach Bill Cubit.

Yep…North Carolina CANNOT lose to this Illinois team that was in Complete and Total Disarray just a few weeks ago because a loss in this spot to drop to 1 – 2 with the below schedule still looming…

Delaware
At Georgia Tech
Wake Forest
Virginia
At Pitt
Duke
Miami
At Virginia Tech
NC State

…would put both Fedora and the Tar Heels in a precarious position as ACC Conference play gets underway on October 3 with a game at Georgia Tech.

Memo to SPF which is short for Six Pack Fedora here at Coaches Hot Seat: DO NOT LOSE TO Illinois! Signed: Coaches Hot Seat

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30.  Frank Beamer, Virginia Tech – Frank Beamer and the Hokies loaded-up on a CUPCAKE this past Saturday with a win over Furman and now it is back to reality for Virginia Tech with a game at Purdue in Week 3 in what is for Damn sure…

A MUST WIN Game for Frank Beamer and Virginia Tech

….because a loss in this spot to a Purdue football team that has won FIVE total football games the past three seasons would be nothing short of a Complete Freaking Disaster and fully reveal the current….

Hapless State of Virginia Tech Football

….which in what may be Frank Beamer’s last season in Blacksburg is certainly something that Coach Beamer does not want to be fully revealed for all the world to see.

With a game at East Carolina in Week 4 a loss to Purdue might just lead to the Hokies starting the 2015 season at…

1 – 3

….and fighting for their lives just to get to a pitiful bowl game and is a mediocre season and pitiful bowl game really how Frank Beamer wants to go out at Virginia Tech after a legendary coaching career?

NO is the answer to that question and thus YES Virginia Tech had better Damn beat Purdue!

Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 11 – 20 Hot Seat Coaches – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

A chair on fire... metaphor "In The Hot Seat"

Give these Hot Seat Coaches Hell Mr. Cash!

Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

11.  Paul Petrino, Idaho – Now in his third season at Idaho head coach Paul Petrino has posted a record of…

2 – 22

…which includes an opening 2015 season loss to Ohio by a score of 45 – 28.

YES…2 – 22 will land your ass on the Hot Seat and that is exactly where Paul Petrino is at and has been for years now!

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12.  Ron Turner, Florida International – We are not quite sure how FIU beat UCF in Orlando on Thursday…more on George O’Leary who is now on the Hot Seat due to the loss to FIU in a bit…but a win is a win and a win over UCF moves Ron Turner down the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings BUT if Turner is going to get off the Hot Seat for good he will need more than 4 wins in 2015 and HELL if you can beat UCF in Orlando you can beat a pitiful Indiana team in Bloomington this coming Saturday….right?

RIGHT!

NCAA Football: Wake Forest at Stanford

13.  David Shaw, Stanford – Dozens of Coaches Hot Seat members were in the San Francisco Bay area and around Stanford University for work and various professional educational things in August so many of us were able to take-in and size-up the Stanford football August preseason camp and by the third week of August a consensus had been reached that we came very close to publishing in the Coaches Hot Seat Blog that we held back on because….WELL….maybe we were wrong and why send out alarms to Stanford’s first opponent Northwestern about potential problems with Stanford football so we kept our mouths shut.

After seeing in person and watching on TV the Stanford – Northwestern game this past Saturday we can now say….

WE WERE NOT WRONG!

….about the Complete Freaking Disaster that we were watching unfold in August on The Farm which has led to the…

Complete Freaking Disaster that is Stanford Football right now!

Let’s quickly summarize what several Coaches Hot Seat members saw in August with Stanford football by quoting a CHS Member on what he thought of the Cardinal’s August camp practices:

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“If you held all of Stanford’s August football practices in a balsa wood house not only would the balsa wood house still be standing there would not be one dent in any of the balsa wood!”

What the Hell does the above mean exactly?

Stanford Football NO LONGER PLAYS FOOTBALL under head coach David Shaw but rather Shaw just holds pillow fights among the players so the…

Candy Ass Coaches and Candy Ass Players can act like they are football players when in FACT

….any random sorority football team from any university in the country could whip the Hell out of the….

Candy Ass Coaches and Candy Ass Players that call themselves Stanford Football!

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On top of Stanford Football players being Candy Asses that are coached by Candy Asses did anyone else catch the Stanford offense against Northwestern?

Got there are Thousands of Pee Wee football teams across America that not only hit harder but are better coached and more sophisticated than the Stanford offense right now?

What a Complete Freaking Joke Stanford Football is right now and in our opinion the current state of Stanford Football goes straight to the head coach David Shaw who also in our opinion…

Wouldn’t know an honest day’s work if it hit him in the ass!

No David Shaw…sitting in your office listening to jazz music is NOT working IF you are the head coach of the Stanford football team which by the way you have turned into the…

Biggest Group of Candy Asses in the American Republic today!

Congratulations David Shaw you should be Mighty Damn Proud of Yourself because you are going to do the Next Too Damn Impossible….

Be handed a championship football program from Jim Harbaugh and less than three years later be now sitting on a record over your last 15 games of…

8 – 7

….and headed towards getting your precious jazz listening ass run right off The Farm!

Up next for the Candy Asses in Cardinal:

UCF this coming Saturday on The Farm which just lost to FIU at home!

Here’s a thought:

The Stanford football coaches and players should all get in their best Sunday dresses out and find some nice pillows from the nearby Macy’s at the Stanford Shopping Center for the UCF game and do what they best and love so very much in style…

Have a Pillow Fight!

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Fear the Tree? No…not any longer on The Farm!

Fear the Pillows being swung by the Candy Ass Coaches and Players on the Stanford NOT A Football Team anymore!

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14.  Les Miles, LSU – Let’s give the award…

Thank God Almighty that those Idiots weren’t around during World War II

…to the LSU athletic department that could not find a way to move a game one day forward to Sunday after the McNeese State – LSU game was cancelled on Saturday which lots of…

Flunky Paper Pushers in the LSU Athletic Department

….couldn’t somehow do who no doubt would be selling apples on the local street corner if they weren’t working in athletics where morons can hang around forever whether they are actually good at their jobs or not who and couldn’t just say this simple Damn thing:

“Sorry Folks….the McNeese State – LSU game is cancelled…see everyone back here at Tiger Stadium tomorrow for a 5PM for kick-off.”

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Would the above had meant that the McNeese State football team would have driven the 130 miles back to their campus in Lake Charles to spend the night and driven back to Baton Rouge on Sunday for the game?

YES….Big Freaking Deal!

Would the above have meant that LSU Athletics would have spent a few extra hundred thousand dollars in overtime for people working in and around Tiger Stadium?

YES…Big Freaking Deal!

Would the above have meant that LSU athletic administrators otherwise known as Precious Candy Ass Paper Pushers would have had to do some extra work over the weekend?

YES…Big Freaking Deal!

Bottom-Line: LSU Athletics is run by Complete Freaking Morons that cannot move a football game…..A Freaking Football Game…one day forward!

YES…it is true…there are Complete Freaking Morons in position of authority all over America right now and LSU Athletics is a prime example of that FACT!

Getting back to Les Miles the LSU Tigers now open the season at Mississippi State and if Les Miles’ football team loses that game…

Expect your ass to be the temperature in the Bayou on a HOT August Day Les Miles!

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15.  Kliff Kingsbury, Texas Tech – PBK’s….Pretty Boy Kingsbury…football team at Texas Tech got a 59 – 45 win over FCS team Sam Houston in Week 1 which means about as much as a grain of sand being washed into the ocean and in Week 2 the Red Raiders play UTEP at home in a game that very simply…

PBK…Pretty Boy Kingsbury….CANNOT LOSE

….with Arkansas in Week 3.

Oh…Arkansas beat UTEP in Week 1 by the score of 48 – 13 so everyone here at Coaches Hot Seat will be watching this UTEP – Texas Tech game and score very closely!

Good Luck to you PBK!

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16.  Steve Sarkisian, USC – USC whipped an overmatched Arkansas State team in Week 1 and the Trojans play a very weak Idaho team in Week 2 and then USC gets…

The Balsa Wood Candy Ass Pillow Fight Boys of Stanford in Week 3

….so USC should EASILY be 3 – 0 when they head to play Arizona State in Tempe on September 26.

As for Steve Sarkisian and his recent “troubles” we can only say to Steve….

Focus on Family and Football Steve and keep the Focus there….PERIOD.

17.  Larry Fedora, North Carolina – North Carolina looked better…especially the UNC defense under Gene Chizik…than the Tar Heels looked in 2014 BUT the OLD Ball Coach’s South Carolina team looked AVERAGE at best so was UNC’s performance against the Gamecocks something to be impressed with or just….whatever?

In our opinion….WHATEVER….because there are probably some high schools team in the South that could whip the South Carolina team that the OLD Ball Coach ran out onto the field in Charlotte!

Coming up for Larry Fedora and North Carolina:

NC A&T
Illinois
Delaware

Hell…North Carolina SHOULD be…

3 – 1

…when go to Atlanta to play Georgia Tech on October 3!

If not…Larry Fedora knows where he will be….no NOT on the beach with is shirt off wowing the ladies and looking for someone that will take a picture of him but rather….

On the FREAKING HOT SEAT!

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18.  Kirk Ferentz, Iowa – It’s not just the Iowa football team that is a Complete Freaking Disaster at the University of Iowa after reading about who Iowa just hired as the new president of the school….

The University of Iowa Campus looking west from Old Capitol and the Pentacrest.

Rocky Start for University of Iowa President, Rekha Basu, Des Moines Register

“Less than 2 percent of the faculty thinks J. Bruce Harreld is qualified to be the University of Iowa’s next president; among the college community at large, it’s 2.6 percent. By contrast, more than 90 percent of respondents to a campus survey gave high ratings to the other three finalists.

Nonetheless, Harreld was named UI’s 21st president Thursday in a unanimous vote from the Iowa Board of Regents. In so doing, they chose a former business executive with no experience in university administration, whose resume lists as his present employer a company he has since acknowledged no longer exists.

Harreld has also admitted he’ll have a steep learning curve for the job, and that his “unusual background” will mean he’ll need a lot of teaching, coaching and mentoring from those who criticized him. It’s good he acknowledged that, and gracious to extend the olive branch. But considering he’ll earn $590,000, plus $200,000 annually in deferred compensation, on-the-job training shouldn’t be necessary.”

What in the Freaking Hell?

Of course, the Iowa regents hiring this Buffoon as the new University of Iowa president makes the school paying football coach Kirk Ferentz $4 Million Dollars a year make sense….well…NOTHING can make paying Kirk Ferentz all that money for mediocrity make sense which brings us to the…

$4 Million Dollar Man Kirk Ferentz

…who over the last five seasons while earning around $20 Million Dollars has posted records of…

Overall:  34 – 30

Big Ten:  19 – 21

…which is a good gig if you can’t be the president of the University of Iowa who it seems is NOT qualified for the job while hauling down almost $800K a year!

Anyone else starting to notice a pattern here at the University of Iowa and if so what does that pattern mean?

We don’t know the exact answer to that question but there are plenty of people here at Coaches Hot Seat that are NOT qualified for lots of jobs at the University of Iowa that make six-figures a year and if we can just get to the right person in Iowa no doubt we will be hired in a Helluva hurry…and kept around whether we FAIL at our jobs or not!

Who is dumber….the folks at LSU that can’t move a football game one day forward or the folks at Iowa that pay a football coach millions of dollars for mediocrity and just hired a president that in our opinion that doesn’t know his ass from the side of a barn when it comes to run a major state university?

It’s Iowa by an eyelash!

The N-O Man: The University of Iowa’s new president has no experience, no ideas, and flubbed his own resume, Kembrew McLeod, Slate.com

Oh, these are just Complete Freaking Idiots at the University of Iowa!

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19.  Mike MacIntyre, Colorado – As we said last week in the Preseason Coaches Hot Seat Ranking Analysis we were hoping for a…

Herculean Effort

…by Mike MacIntyre and the Colorado Buffs in 2015 and what in the Hell did the CU Buffs do in the first game against Hawaii?

The CU Buffs looked like Complete Freaking Buffoons at the opening of the game against the Warriors and it really looked like the head coach and coaching staff showed up at the first game on the sideline without coaching during August camp at all!

Geez….Mike MacIntyre…what in the Hell is going on in Boulder son?

Our recommendation for Colorado head coach Mike MacIntyre: Get things fixed with your football team this week against UMass because if you lose that Week 3 game to Colorado State which has a first-year head coach in Mike Bobo the rest of the 2015 football season could turn into a Complete Freaking Disaster especially with the Oregon Ducks coming to town on October 3.

If Colorado somehow lost to UMass this Saturday in Boulder Mike MacIntyre and the entire CU coaching staff should be fired before they leave the field and a local high school staff should be hired to coach the rest of the season!

Memo to Mike MacIntyre:  Get Off Your Ass Son!

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20.  Mike Leach, Washington StateReally Mike Leach?

Lose to Portland State in the home opening game in Pullman?

Really Mike Leach?

Your Football Team looked like SHIT on Saturday Mike Leach and since we know you can coach we can only draw ONE conclusion after that pitiful loss to Portland State:

Mike Leach just no longer gives a SHIT because his Washington State football team now plays like SHIT!

In Mike Leach’s last 15 football games at Washington State the Cougars are…

3 – 12

…and those 3 wins last season were over….

Portland State
Utah
Oregon State

Oh…Portland State and Oregon State had losing records last year so in the last 15 games Mike Leach has beaten…

1 Team with a winning record

…and anyone that recalls the Washington State – Utah game from last season knows it took a miracle for the Cougars to win that game!

What is going on at Washington State exactly with Mike Leach?

Well…it’s just our opinion…but Mike Leach was always a terrible fit for Pullman, Washington because look at where Mike Leach was living when he could live anywhere he wanted to live…

Key West, Florida

KeyWestFlorida81818

Still…Mike Leach won a lot of football games at Texas Tech in Lubbock, Texas which isn’t Key West, Florida either so there really is no excuse for Mike Leach to be losing to Portland State in the first game of this third season at Washington State so then just what in the Hell is going on in Pullman?

We think we know BUT we are going to hold our tongue and watch and see IF…

Mike Leach and Washington State just flat out QUIT in 2015 after the opening season loss OR if they come back strong this week in a very tough game at Rutgers.

Your choice Mike Leach and Washington State BUT if Mike Leach does fail at Washington State he will be remembered as…

The Football Coach that got run out of Lubbock

AND

The Football Coach that QUIT in Pullman

Great thing is Mike Leach will be able to determine how this story ends and if it ends badly whether we like Mike Leach or not if the current trend continues in Pullman we will light Mike Leach’s ass up!

Is everyone reading the Coaches Hot Seat Blog starting to understand that we are TOUGHEST on the people we expect the most from?

That’s way ALL alumni and fans should be….don’t accept anything less than…

EXCELLENCE

…and you have a Helluva lot better chance of actually getting…

EXCELLENCE!

21 – 30 Post Week Hot Seat Coaches Analysis Coming Soon!