“They got a name for the winners in the world….I want a name when I lose…they call Alabama the Crimson Tide….call me Deacon Blues…Deacon Blues.”
Enjoy the GREAT Steely Dan performing Deacon Blues!
Gus Malzahn, Auburn vs. Kentucky – It’s always fascinating to sit down and watch a game with a Football Coach and that is just what several Coaches Hot Seat members did earlier this week with a former high school football coach of ours that won a Helluva lot of football games and knows as much about defense and stopping high-scoring offenses as anyone in America and his take on the recent Auburn – LSU game that we watched together was fascinating indeed. We also watched with our former Football Coach some of the Mississippi State – Auburn game so he could see some of Sean White playing QB for Auburn and how the Tigers defense went about slowing down the Bulldogs offense and after a couple of hours here is what that Football Coach told us on what ails Auburn HC Gus Malzahn and his football team:
Former High School Football Coach: “Hell, a team with ineffective and inexperienced quarterbacks plus an inexperienced defense is going to have a Helluva tough time winning football games and it’s clear based upon the number of mistakes that the Auburn QBs and defensive players are making that it is primarily caused by inexperienced players and coaches that are not quite getting through to their players on what they are supposed to be doing. Malzahn’s offense is just not going to work unless his QBs start making faster decisions and neither QB right now has enough experience or confidence to make those faster and what must be correct decisions. The game is just too fast in the SEC these days and if I was defending the Auburn offense I would go all Bebes Stalllings and work hard to put tremendous pressure on the Auburn QBs and receivers.
Coaches Hot Seat: What about the Auburn defense?
Former High School Football Coach: They played better against Mississippi State but State QB Prescott made lots of mistakes that cost his team lots of potential points and if I am seeing the mistakes that the Auburn defenders are making…sometimes the same mistakes over and over again…then for sure other SEC defensive coaches are seeing them too. Hey, let me ask you guys…what is Auburn’s record from the loss to Mississippi State last season until right now?
Coaches Hot Seat (Looks it up on Internet): Auburn has played 13 games from the Mississippi State game in 2014 until right now and they are 6 – 7 overall and 2 – 6 in SEC play. Why do you ask?
Let’s not forget going into the Mississippi State game last season Gus Malzahn’s record at Auburn stood at….
17 – 2
….and his record in SEC stood at….
9 – 1
….and from the Mississippi State game forward Malzahn record overall is…
6 – 7
…and his record in SEC play is…
2 – 6!
What did our Former High School Football Coach see was breaking-down with the Auburn offense against Mississippi State last year that he says has continued to worsen into this season?
Let’s just say that what he saw is FUNDAMENTAL to running the football and FUNDAMENTAL to playing winning football and the Auburn offense has gone from being very good at this FUNDAMENTAL thing in 2013 and early in the 2014 season to being very average at best at doing this FUNDAMENTAL thing in 2015.
Whatever the problems with the Auburn offense there is one Damn thing we know for sure….
Kentucky is a CANNOT LOSE game for Gus Malzahn and the Auburn Tigers because with these games left after the Wildcats….
At Arkansas Ole Miss At Texas A&M Georgia Idaho Alabama
….there is a Helluva good chance that Auburn finished at…
4 – 8
…if they lose to Kentucky and if that doesn’t put the pressure squarely on Gus Malzahn and his football team then NOTHING will and we are going to be fascinated to see how the Tigers respond to all that pressure.
David Shaw, Stanford vs. UCLA – Many moons ago a few Coaches Hot Seat members were sitting on the terrace of a restaurant on the French Rivera overlooking over the Mediterranean Sea while on liberty call from our US Navy Ship with a 1-Star Admiral who we had known for years in a couple of different duty and training stops. On that beautiful night sitting above the Mediterranean after a magnificent dinner, drinks, dessert and then coffee we were talking about what makes a great ship or organization for that matter really tick and as we junior officers threw-out our opinions on the subject one of us finally asked the 1-Star Admiral who had seen a Helluva lot and led thousands of men during his time in the US Navy what he thought on the subject:
1-Star Admiral: “Boys….great ships, companies, organizations, teams, small groups…whatever….can be run and managed in lots of different ways and be very successful BUT there is one thing they all have in common…they all have an edge to them…a whiff of not exactly knowing what is coming next…and an excitement by everyone within the organization to see just what in the Hell is coming next because….you’re not really sure what it will be but for Damn sure you and your shipmates will be able to handle it whatever IT is. Without that edge…without the uncertainty and the excitement that comes with not exactly knowing what is coming next and thus everyone’s requirement that they be on their toes and ready for anything an organization will slowly die as the people within that organization slowly stop caring and then go to sleep.”
Coaches Hot Seat Member: “How then does a leader go about creating that edge within the organization he is leading?”
1-Star Admiral: “It’s rather simple really Boys and it starts with…..
EVERY great LEADER we have ever known or worked for knows how that 1-Star Admiral sentence above finishes because a LEADER knows how to…
“Create and Sustain the Edge that makes organizations GREAT!”
We said a few weeks ago in this blog that the Stanford football team was going to sleep and that unless it woke the Hell up in a Helluva hurry not only would the 2015 season be lost but a pattern would be set with TWO straight AVERAGE seasons which would make clawing one’s way back to elite status in 2016 that much harder and since we wrote that the Stanford football program was going to sleep after the Northwestern game the Cardinal has won FOUR straight games outscoring their opponents by an average of…
….and as of right now the EDGE is back on The Farm for Stanford Football and the Coaches Hot Seat members gathered in Palo Alto for tonight’s UCLA – Stanford game will be fascinated to see if David Shaw and the Cardinal can keep things rolling.
If Stanford Football has designs on winning a THIRD Pac-12 Championship in FOUR seasons and getting into the College Football Playoff then very simply….
UCLA is a CANNOT LOSE Game
…and we fully expect to see the Cardinal come out and play like men possessed against the UCLA Bruins.
Curtis Johnson, Tulane vs. Houston – Coming off a 49 – 10 loss to a rapidly improving Temple football team Tulane head coach Curtis Johnson and his football team needs a WIN in the worst way but beating a Houston team that is scoring points like the Baylor Bears is not going to be an easy thing to do but that doesn’t change the reality that….
Houston is a MUST WIN Game for Curtis Johnson and Tulane!
Tim DeRuyter, Fresno State vs. UNLV– People that have not been to Fresno, California like we here at Coaches Hot Seat have thousands of times while passing through the Central Valley of California during our lives on this Earth certainly don’t understand what a depressed and often depressing place that Fresno can be and why the Fresno State head coaching job is not an easy one because in a sport where the Head Coach can NEVER LET UP it’s not always easy to keep plowing ahead in a place like Fresno.
Still, it’s the job of Fresno State head coach Tim DeRuyter to win football games and now off to a 1 – 5 start to the 2015 season the Bulldogs need some wins and quick and a game against UNLV at home with a first year head coach is just the type of game where DeRuyter can begin to get the ship righted and get his team ready for the rest of the season which includes one Damn tough slate of games:
UNLV At Air Force Nevada At Hawaii At BYU Colorado State
Oh Man…YES….UNLV is a CANNOT LOSE game for Tim DeRuyter and Fresno State!
21. Kevin Wilson, Indiana – After a nice 4 – 0 start to the season Indiana head coach Kevin Wilson is back on the Hot Seat after back-to-back losses to Ohio State and Penn State and the Hoosiers needs to get things rolling again this Saturday in a game at home against Rutgers.
Now in his FIFTH season as the head coach at Indiana Kevin Wilson has…
ZERO .500 or better seasons
ZERO postseason bowl games
….and in our opinion a .500 or better season is a MUST if Kevin Wilson wants to return to coach the Hoosiers in 2016.
Now at 4 – 2 on the season the Hoosiers have left to play…..
Rutgers At Michigan State Iowa Michigan At Maryland At Purdue
….and we see No Damn Reason at all why Kevin Wilson and Indiana don’t win at least 2 of their last 6 games!
Coach ‘Em Up Kevin!
22. Dana Holgorsen, West Virginia – West Virginia opened the season with THREE wins in out-of-conference play against teams that the Mountaineers should have beaten pretty easily BUT now that Big 12 Conference play has started WVU has lost two straight games to Oklahoma and Oklahoma State and the Hot Seat is heating up under Dana Holgorsen who is now sitting on a Big 12 Conference record over the past FOUR seasons of….
16 – 20
….and that is something Crazy Boy Holgorsen MUST fix and quick starting with this Saturday’s game at Baylor…..Ooops….guess that will a Big 12 Conference record of…
16 – 21
….after this Saturday’s game at Baylor!
Oh….West Virginia plays at TCU in Week 8!
Damn…will West Virginia be….
3 – 4
…when Texas Tech comes to Morgantown on November 7.
Sure the Hell looks like it so Crazy Boy Holgorsen better start pulling off some Crazy Shit soon or couch burning will be the least of his worries in the hills of beautiful West Virginia!
23. Tim DeRuyter, Fresno State – After an opening season win over Abilene Christian Tim DeRuyter’s Fresno State Bulldogs have lost FIVE straight games including a 56 – 14 drubbing at the hands of Utah State last Saturday and now the season could really go off the rails for the Bulldogs unless Tim DeRuyter can get things turned-around in a Friday night game at home against UNLV! With a game at Air Force a week from Saturday very simply Fresno State CANNOT LOSE to UNLV and we will be fascinated to see how the Bulldogs come out and play against the Rebels focusing on if Tim DeRuyter can find a way to motivate his football team at this very challenging time!
Play like Hell Bulldogs….but then is there any other way to play football?
24. Curtis Johnson, Tulane – Now sitting on a record of 2 – 3 after five games into the 2015 season the biggest thing working against Curtis Johnson are his win/loss records now in his FOURTH season on the job at Tulane which stand at…
Overall: 14 – 28
CUSA: 1 0 – 16
…especially since a lot of folks including us here at Coaches Hot Seat believed that 2015 would be the year that Johnson would get things rolling in New Orleans.
Here is what Tulane has left on their schedule this season:
Houston At Navy At Memphis UConn At Army At SMU Tulsa
Damn….if Curtis Johnson can get Tulane to SIX wins in 2015 that will be a Helluva coaching job so…
Coach ‘Em Up Curtis!
25. Todd Monken, Southern Miss – Todd Monken is now in his THIRD season as the head coach at Southern Miss and he has win/loss records on the board of…
Overall: 7 – 23
CUSA: 3 – 15
….and although the Golden Eagles are playing some noticeably better football in 2015 a Week 6 loss to Marshall has left USM at 3 – 3 on the season and in need of some more wins and….quick!
Here is what Southern Miss has left on their schedule…
Texas San Antonio At Charlotte UTEP At Rice Old Dominion At La. Tech
…and we see No Damn Reason at all why USM doesn’t win at least 3 of their last 6 games to get to .500 on the season and to a postseason bowl game starting with a win over Texas San Antonio on Saturday!
26. Ron Turner, Florida International – After a nice win over UTEP by the score of 52 – 12 FIU head coach Ron Turner has a chance to get off the Hot Seat with at Middle Tennessee on Saturday but that won’t be an easy thing to do because MTSU almost beat Vanderbilt in Murfreesboro a couple of weeks back.
With FIU now at 3 – 3 on the season can Ron Turner get the Golden Panthers get to 6 wins in 2015 getting Turner’s ass of the Hot Seat in the process? Let’s go the rest of FIU’s remaining schedule to see:
At Middle Tennessee Old Dominion At Florida Atlantic Charlotte At Marshall Western Kentucky
6 wins for FIU in 2015? Rather doubt that should be able to beat its’ 4 win total from last season or Ron Turner = Hot Seat!
27. Willie Taggart, South Florida – Willie Taggart and the South Florida Bulls got a GREAT win in Week 6 over Syracuse and now USF needs to keep things rolling in Week 7 with a game at UConn and Hell if you can beat Syracuse you can beat UConn….right? RIGHT!
Willie Taggart REALLY needs to get South Florida to 6-plus wins in 2015 and with the Bulls now at 2 – 3 and with these games left to play…
At UConn SMU At Navy At East Carolina Temple Cincinnati At UCF
….USF has no room to lose to UConn this Saturday so Coach Up Those Bulls Willie and keep the bus rolling!
28. Paul Haynes, Kent State – Kent State got destroyed by Toledo on Saturday by a score of 38 – 7 which landed the Golden Flashes head coach Paul Haynes back on the Hot Seat and that seat will only get Hotter if Kent State loses a CANNOT LOSE game at UMass this coming Saturday.
In his third season as the head coach at Kent State Paul Haynes has posted win/loss records of…
Overall: 8 – 21
MAC: 5 – 12
….and sooner or later…make that SOONER….Paul Haynes will have to start winning some football games starting with a win against UMass on Saturday so how about it Paul? Can we get a win for your Kent State team on Saturday son? Let’s sure the Hell hope so for Paul Haynes’ rear-end’s sake!
29. Charlie Partridge, Florida Atlantic – Charlie Partridge is now in his second season as the head coach at FAU and his win/loss records now stand at…
Overall: 4 – 13
CUSA: 3 – 7
…and it’s time for Charlie to start WINNING some football games! After a close loss at home to Rice by one point Partridge and FAU has a tough challenge in their next game at home against…
Come on Charlie….the time for WINNING is NOW!
30. Mike MacIntyre, Colorado – Mike MacIntyre is in his THIRD season as the head coach at Colorado and is in the midst of trying to rebuild a CU football program that was at the lowest of the low when he took over BUT by the THIRD season on the job TIME is no longer an excuse that can be proffered for why a team is not winning football games and with the Buffs now at…
3 – 3
….on the 2015 season the season is at a crossroads with the Arizona Wildcats coming to Boulder for a CRITICAL game that Mike MacIntyre MUST win if he is going to get things turned around at Colorado.
With these games remaining in 2015 for Colorado….
Arizona At Oregon State At UCLA Stanford USC At Washington State At Utah
….there is NO margin for error if the Buffs are going to win 6 games and with that in mind we can only say…
“All the world’s a stage, and all the men and women merely players: they have their exits and their entrances; and one man in his time plays many parts, his acts being seven ages.”
“Be not afraid of greatness: some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them.”
“Cowards die many times before their deaths; the valiant never taste of death but once.”
“Life every man holds dear; but the dear man holds honor far more precious dear than life.”
“Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player, that struts and frets his hour upon the stage, and then is heard no more; it is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.”
“Listen to many, speak to a few.”
“Pleasure and action make the hours seem short.”
“Talking isn’t doing. It is a kind of good deed to say well; and yet words are not deeds.”
“There is a tide in the affairs of men, Which taken at the flood, leads on to fortune. Omitted, all the voyage of their life is bound in shallows and in miseries. On such a full sea are we now afloat. And we must take the current when it serves, or lose our ventures.”
“Things done well and with a care, exempt themselves from fear.”
“To be, or not to be: that is the question.”
“To thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man.”
“We know what we are, but know not what we may be.”
“To be, or not to be, — that is the question: — Whether ’tis nobler in the mind to suffer The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, Or to take arms against a sea of troubles, And by opposing end them? — To die, to sleep, — No more; and by a sleep to say we end The heart-ache, and the thousand natural shocks That flesh is heir to, — ’tis a consummation Devoutly to be wish’d. To die, to sleep; — To sleep, perchance to dream: — ay, there’s the rub; For in that sleep of death what dreams may come, When we have shuffled off this mortal coil, Must give us pause: there’s the respect That makes calamity of so long life; For who would bear the whips and scorns of time, The oppressor’s wrong, the proud man’s contumely, The pangs of despis’d love, the law’s delay, The insolence of office, and the spurns That patient merit of the unworthy takes, When he himself might his quietus make With a bare bodkin? who would these fardels bear, To grunt and sweat under a weary life, But that the dread of something after death, — The undiscover’d country, from whose bourn No traveller returns, — puzzles the will, And makes us rather bear those ills we have Than fly to others that we know naught of? Thus conscience does make cowards of us all; And thus the native hue of resolution Is sicklied o’er with the pale cast of thought; And enterprises of great pith and moment, With this regard, their currents turn awry, And lose the name of action.” Hamlet, Act III, Scene 1
“She should have died hereafter; There would have been time for such a word. Tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow Creeps in this petty pace from day to day To the last syllable of recorded time; And all our yesterdays have lighted fools The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle! Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player That struts and frets his hour upon the stage, And then is heard no more. It is a tale Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, Signifying nothing.” Macbeth, Act V, Scene 5
“There is a tide in the affairs of men Which, taken at the flood, leads on to fortune; Omitted, all the voyage of their life Is bound in shallows and in miseries. On such a full sea are we now afloat; And we must take the current when it serves, Or lose our ventures.” Julius Caesar, Brutus, Act IV, Scene 3
“My bounty is as boundless as the sea, My love as deep; the more I give to thee, The more I have, for both are infinite.” Romeo and Juliet
“When he shall die, Take him and cut him out in little stars, And he will make the face of heaven so fine That all the world will be in love with night And pay no worship to the garish sun.” Romeo and Juliet
“Did my heart love till now? forswear it, sight! For I ne’er saw true beauty till this night.” Romeo and Juliet
“Don’t waste your love on somebody, who doesn’t value it.” Romeo and Juliet
“There’s an old saying that applies to me: you can’t lose a game if you don’t play the game. (Act 1, scene 4)” Romeo and Juliet
“True, I talk of dreams, Which are the children of an idle brain, Begot of nothing but vain fantasy, Which is as thin of substance as the air, And more inconstant than the wind, who woos Even now the frozen bosom of the north, And, being anger’d, puffs away from thence, Turning his side to the dew-dropping south.” Romeo and Juliet
The Retirement of Steve Spurrier = Head Ball Coach
Several Coaches Hot Seat members happened to be in the San Francisco Bay area last night after a weekend of watching college football and taking their families to see the US Navy and Blue Angels at Fleet Week over and around San Francisco Bay and they were having dinner last night at a Cheesecake Factory in Marin County just north of San Francisco when the news broke that…
It wasn’t lost on those Coaches Hot Seat members that they were also together having dinner together in that same Cheesecake Factory in Marin County in November 2011 when it was announced that Joe Paterno had been fired by Penn State and both the Paterno firing and Spurrier retirement left all of us with that shocked feeling that imprints on one’s brain the time and place where one first learned about those two events. Both Joe Paterno and Steve Spurrier are LEGENDS in the history of college football in America and both are true American Originals which is saying something in a world where so many people are afraid to be who they really are…no worries on that front with JoePa and the Head Ball Coach who were true to themselves and WINNERS in every sense of the word to the end!
We could write a Helluva lot in this spot about Steve Spurrier right now and we have written a Helluva lot about the Head Ball Coach over the past NINE college football seasons that Coaches Hot Seat has been following this great game BUT by far TWO Coaches Hot Seat members first encounter with Coach Spurrier is the most memorable story of all:
In the spring of 1990 two Coaches Hot Seat members were serving in the US Navy in Jacksonville, Florida and were looking for a house to rent and answered an ad in the newspaper…..this was long before the Internet was invented by Al Gore young folks so yes a newspaper….so they called up the phone number and the guy renting the house said he would be there that afternoon and to just drive over and see the place.
The two Coaches Hot Seat members drove over to the rental house which was just a couple of blocks from the Atlantic Ocean in Jacksonville Beach, Florida and found no one out front and no one answered the door so they walked around back and there they saw an older man moving a garbage can that had what looked like an empty keg in it with several other empty kegs also sitting on the back deck. This older man turns towards the two Coaches Hot Seat members when he sees them and he has on a t-shirt that looked something like this:
The two Coaches Hot Seat members introduced themselves and then one said to the older man:
Coaches Hot Seat Member: “You a big Florida football fan?”
Older Man: “Hell yes….been one since I was a student there in the 1960s. You guys know who Steve Spurrier is?”
Coaches Hot Seat Member: “The new Florida head football coach.”
Older Man: “Very good son. That’s right and I was at Florida when Steve won the Heisman Trophy and we are going to win a Helluva lot of football games once Steve gets things rolling in Gainesville! So you boys looking for a house to rent?”
Coaches Hot Seat Member: “Yes, sir and we are huge college football fans.”
Older Man looks over the two young men who are clean-cut and obviously in the US Navy: “Great….go ahead and look around the house and bring me out a cold beer that is in the fridge when you come back out. We had a party here last night and there are a few cases of beer left in the fridge that you two can keep if you rent the house.”
The two Coaches Hot Seat members both said “Great” and then took a quick look around the house which at $1,000 a month was a bargain with it being only two blocks from the beach so they came back out and told the Older Man that they would take the house and they all sat on the back deck and talked about college football and drink cold beers for the next few hours.
To make a long story short the Older Man took the two Coaches Hot Seat members down to Gainesville in August when Florida football started their first Fall camp under Steve Spurrier and a “friend” of the Older Man who worked in Florida athletic department and who will remain nameless for obvious reasons to at least some folks took the two Coaches Hot Seat members out to the practice field where they got to meet Steve Spurrier and they watched the Gators practice for awhile.
Not long after watching Spurrier working with the Florida quarterbacks one Coaches Hot Seat member said out loud to no one in particular:
“Florida is going to be throwing the ball all over the field under Spurrier and that is going to create chaos in the SEC.”
As many in the media have pointed out over the last 25 years….Steve Spurrier’s Fun-N-Gun offense at Florida did just that….created chaos…and what GREAT fun it was to watch and follow the Head Ball Coach for the past 25-plus years and make that 40-plus years for the Coaches Hot Seat members that are just barely old enough to remember Spurrier playing quarterback for the San Francisco 49ers for nine seasons between 1967 and 1975 after being selected in the First Round and Third overall in the 1967 NFL Draft.
There is so very Damn much that dozens of Coaches Hot Seat members would like to write in this spot about Coach Spurrier BUT what all of those sentiments boil down to is this….
Thanks Head Ball Coach….for Everything…and Best of Luck to you in Retirement.
OK…with the Head Ball Coach now in retirement and his ass off the Hot Seat let’s get to the….
Post Week 6 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 10 – 20 Hot Seat Head Coaches
The Hot Seat Is Not A Fun Place To Be For These Hot Seat Coaches But Turn Up The Heat Up On Them A Little More Johnny Cash!
10. Doug Martin, New Mexico State – With a very predictable loss to Ole Miss on Saturday New Mexico State and their head coach fell to…
0 – 5
….on the season and there is a very good chance the Aggies don’t win a game in 2015 with these games remaining to be played:
At Georgia Southern Troy Idaho At Texas State At La. Lafayette Arkansas State At La. Monroe
Hell, we will go ahead and predict New Mexico State will be 0 – 11 when the travel to play at La. Monroe on December 5 and that is a game that the Aggies might just be able to win!
As for the subject of a report on ESPN we caught over the weekend about the long-term losing that has dominated New Mexico State football in recent years it’s our opinion if NMSU hired the RIGHT coach that they could win again and when we say RIGHT coach we mean a young and up-and-coming coach that is hungry as Hell to make his mark in the world.
Is Doug Martin “hungry as Hell to make his mark in the world?”
In our opinion….NO.
11. Paul Petrino, Idaho – Idaho had a bye in Week 6 and the 1 – 4 Vandals get back at things this Saturday with a game at Troy which has a first-year head coach who is now sitting on a record of 1 – 4 also so this is a game that Paul Petrino’s football team COULD win if they play like Hell and leave the porridge at the door!
What does “play like Hell and leave the porridge at the door” mean exactly?
Nothing…we just made it up and we are thinking it means that if you leave the porridge at the door you will not be worried about eating but rather you will be playing like Hell while taking names and kicking ass!
Memo to Paul Petrino: Play like Hell and leave the porridge at the door against Troy!
12. Trent Miles, Georgia State – As expected Georgia State lost to Appalachian State…
37 – 3
….on Saturday which drops Trent Miles win/loss records at Georgia State to:
Overall: 2 – 27
Sun Belt: 1 – 16
With a road trip to play MAC Conference team Ball State up next we can only say…
13. Norm Chow, Hawaii – The losses just keep coming for Norm Chow at Hawaii with San Diego State being the latest team to beat the Warriors this past Saturday in The Islands which leaves Chow’s win/loss records at Hawaii now at:
Overall: 10 – 33
MWC: 4 – 22
Geez….this kind of losing CANNOT continue at Hawaii even if Norm Chow is a nice guy…right? RIGHT…we think!
Not that we have ever discussed with Norm Chow getting fired by Pete Carroll at USC after the 2004 season so Carroll could elevate Steve Sarkisian and Lane Kiffin BUT it would be interesting now to ask Norm what he thinks of the two…
BOYS and most certainly not MEN
….flameouts at USC in Kiffin and now Sarkisian which has been nothing short of a Complete Freaking Disaster for the very proud folks around the USC football program.
Just our opinion…..Norm Chow’s firing by Pete Carroll after the 2004 season was one of the Top 5 Stupidest Decisions in college football in the last 50 years which was only made worse by the reality that people outside the USC football program came to believe that Lane Kiffin and Steve Sarkisian were actually qualified to lead an NFL or college football program when in our opinion both are barely qualified to shovel shit in West Texas not that we would hire either to shovel shit since those two Dumbasses would probably mess that easy Damn job up as well!
Up next for Hawaii a game at New Mexico which is a game that the Warriors should have a chance to win but with TEN wins in FOUR seasons on the job who the Hell knows what Hawaii will do against the Lobos…we sure the Hell don’t know!
14. Charlie Strong, Texas – It was great fun watching Charlie Strong’s Texas football team put a whipping on Big Choke Bob Stoops Sooners on Saturday and that celebration at the end of game by the Texas players and Charlie was EPIC!
Congrats Charlie and the Texas Longhorns!
Now back to reality….the Texas Longhorns are now at 2 – 4 on the season and they host Kansas State a week from Saturday after a bye and beating the Wildcats is…
…because of what is left on the schedule after KSU…
At Iowa State Kansas At West Virginia Texas Tech At Baylor
OK….Texas in our opinion can beat if they continue to play with a lot of passion and pride as they did against Big Choke Bob Stoops and the Sooners…
Kansas State Iowa State Kansas
…which would give the Longhorns FIVE wins on the season but can Texas beat…
West Virginia Texas Tech Baylor
In our opinion NO which means Charlie Strong and the Longhorns are staring right at a record of…
5 – 7
…on the season and Charlie Strong on the Hot Seat heading into the offseason unless of course Charlie Strong and his agent slide into another college head coaching job somewhere not that we would recommend that if Charlie can stand the heat in Austin!
Congrats again Charlie and keep it up!
15. Gus Malzahn, Auburn – With Auburn on a bye in Week 6 the troubles of Gus Malzahn and the Auburn Tigers receded from the public eye BUT a MASSIVE game on Thursday night against an improving Kentucky Wildcats team is just beyond HUGE for Gus Malzahn’s future because a loss in this spot would drop the Tigers’ records in 2015 to…
3 – 3 Overall
0 – 3 in SEC Play
…with Auburn still having to play these games:
At Arkansas Ole Miss At Texas A&M Georgia Idaho Alabama
In our opinion…if Auburn loses to Kentucky the Tigers will end the 2015 season at…
4 – 8
…..and even worse…
0 – 8
….in SEC Conference play and the last Auburn coach that produced an O-FER in SEC Conference play was shown the door in early December which would be one Gene Chizik after the 2012 season.
YES…Kentucky is the BIGGEST game of Gus Malzahn’s young coaching career.
16. Craig Bohl, Wyoming – With yet another loss…this time to Air Force…Wyoming and head coach Craig Bohl dropped to…
0 – 6
…on the season and things don’t get any easier with Nevada coming to Laramie this coming Saturday.
Could Wyoming really go 0 – 12 in Craig Bohl’s second season coaching the Cowboys?
Craig Bohl = Nice Guy…Very Good Football Coach…Took Wrong Job at the Wrong Time…PERIOD.
17. Mike Riley, Nebraska – Before people continue their crying around the idea that Nebraska has lost FOUR games on their opponents last play in 2015 we must say that this Nebraska football team is filled with talent and there is just No Damn Reason why the Huskers did not go ahead and put away…
BYU Miami Illinois Wisconsin
….long before they allowed the opposing team to win on the last play of those games although the last two losses were totally on the Nebraska coaching staff starting with head coach Mike Riley who just failed their players tremendously against Illinois and Wisconsin.
Nebraska is now 2 – 4 on the season and still has to play games against….
At Minnesota Northwestern At Purdue Michigan State At Rutgers Iowa
Best Case Win/Loss Record for Nebraska in 2015 = 7 – 5 – While not great by Nebraska standards if the Huskers win five of their last six games that will be a nice recovery for Mike Riley after a disastrous start in Lincoln.
Worst Case Win/Loss Record for Nebraska in 2015 = 2 – 10 – Yes….Nebraska COULD lose their last six games and finish at 2 – 10 which if it did happen would lead to the firing of Mike Riley and Nebraska AD Shawn Eichorst in early December.
Our Best Guess of the Win/Loss Record for Nebraska in 2015 = 5 – 7 – Yes, we see the Huskers winning three of their remaining six games and finishing with a losing record for only the THIRD time since 1962 which is 53 years for those slow on the uptake with those other TWO losing seasons coming under Bill Callahan who was one of the worst head coaching hires in college football history.
What would happen in Nebraska if the Huskers finished with a losing season in 2015 when they averaged winning NINE games a season under Bo Pelini?
Well…Nebraska fans are now to some extent used to average football and losing even dating back to when Frank Solich was sent packing after the 2003 season so what is another 5 – 7 season although IF we were in Nebraska and were Husker fans and our team went 5 – 7 we would be chewing some butt of someone for Damn sure!
18. Butch Jones, Tennessee – Butch Jones got a badly needed win over Georgia on Saturday and the Vols are now at 3 – 3 on the season with these games left to be played after a bye in Week 7:
At Alabama At Kentucky South Carolina North Texas At Missouri Vanderbilt
In our opinion if Tennessee can beat Georgia and should have beaten Oklahoma, Florida, and Arkansas we see no Damn reason at all why the Vols don’t win at least…
7 if not 8 games in 2015!
What will get Butch Jones OFF the Hot Seat?
7 Wins Minimum not that we would be impressed with 7 Wins but that would get Butch Jones OFF the Hot Seat.
19. Todd Berry, La. Monroe – With a 34 – 24 loss to Tulsa on Saturday Todd Berry’s La. Monroe team dropped to 1 – 4 on the season and the Warhawks still have to play in 2015:
Appalachian State At Idaho At La. Lafayette At Troy Arkansas State At Texas State At Hawaii New Mexico State
Hell…La. Monroe SHOULD win at least 5 of its last 8 games and get to 6 – 7 on the season at the worst and there is Todd Berry’s task…
Get to 6 Wins in 2015!
And if La. Monroe doesn’t get to SIX wins and Todd Berry’s overall record at the school drops to something like….
31 – 43
….in SIX seasons coaching the Warhawks then Katy Bar the Door come December whether Katy leaves the porridge at the door or not!
20. Chuck Martin, Miami (OH) – What the Hell is up Chuck Martin because this Loss, after Loss, after Loss, after Loss is getting old son which included yet another LOSS by Miami (OH) to Ohio on Saturday which drops Chuck Martin’s win/loss records to…
Thanks for a Helluva Life Lived Very Well Head Ball Coach! Have Fun in Retirement! See you at Lake Tahoe next Summer!
“I know the critics are out there. That’s why they’re called critics. They criticize every chance they get.”
“People ask, ‘Why are you still coaching?’ I forgot to get fired and I’m not going to cheat.”
“So, I didn’t say we are going to win a lot, but we are going to play like winners, and we’ve got a plan in place to teach our guys how to play like winners and play like a champion.”
“I don’t want to coach too far into my 60s. By then, I’ll be playing golf four or five times a week.”
“But as coaches, we need to get a little more fire and passion and be more demanding that our guys get the job done. I think players will respond to that, and we’ll see.”
On the Death Valley nickname: “Most of our guys have never been to Death Valley. (LSU’s stadium) is the Death Valley, isn’t it? Or is there another one? There’s two of them. That’s right. There’s two Death Valleys.”
On the state of the South Carolina program (widely attributed, but probably not an original): “We aren’t LSU and we aren’t Alabama. But we sure ain’t Clemson.”
On Dabo Swinney’s anger over the above quote: “I said, ‘Well, what do you want me to do? I didn’t say it.’ Smart people don’t believe everything they read, and they don’t believe hearsay. … I guess Dabo believed it.”
On a fire at the football dorm that destroyed 20 books: “But the real tragedy was that 15 hadn’t been colored yet.”
On scandal in Tallahassee: “You know what FSU stands for, don’t you? Free Shoes University.”
On illegal hits against Danny Wuerffel: “He’s like a New Testament person. He gets slapped up side the face, and turns the other cheek and says, ‘Lord, forgive them for they know not what they’re doing.’ I’m probably more of an Old Testament guy. You spear our guy in the earhole, we think we’re supposed to spear you in the earhole. That’s kind of where we’re a little different.”
On recruiting: “In 12 years at Florida, I don’t think we ever signed a kid from the state of Alabama … Of course, we found out later that the scholarships they were giving out at Alabama were worth a whole lot more than ours.”
On the Vols missing out on the Sugar Bowl during his Florida years: “You can’t spell Citrus without U-T.”
On Peyton Manning: “I know why Peyton came back for his senior year. He wanted to be a three-time star of the Citrus Bowl.”
On playing the Dawgs early: “I don’t know. I sort of always liked playing them that second game because you could always count on them having two or three key players suspended.”
On Georgia recruiting: “Why is it that during recruiting season they sign all the great players, but when it comes time to play the game, we have all the great players? I don’t understand that. What happens to them?”
On South Carolina’s 52-7 win over the Razorbacks: “I do feel badly for Arkansas. That’s no fun getting your butt beat at home, homecoming and all that.”
On the Gamecocks’ matchup at Tennessee “Will be the 14th time I’ve coached in Neyland Stadium. … I’ve coached there more than some of their head coaches.”
On his age: “The Pope is 77 years old and he’s in charge of a billion people. All I have to do is put 11 on the field.”
….and since becoming the interim athletic director this past Summer George O’Leary’s football team has opened the 2015 football season with a record of….
0 – 6!
…which included a loss to a FCS team in Furman!
What’s wrong with UCF football exactly and what does George O’Leary being named the interim athletic director of the school have to do with the Complete Freaking Disaster that is now unfolding in Orlando?
We have our suspicions….BUT….we saw UCF play in person against Stanford on The Farm and we have watched the Knights in several other games this season as well and the TRUTH in our opinion is…
The UCF players have QUIT on George O’Leary for some reason
….and that means UCF could very well be looking at a 0 – 12 season in 2015 with these games left on the schedule:
At Temple Houston At Cincinnati At Tulsa East Carolina South Florida
Hell….if you can’t beat Furman you’re sure the Hell not beating any of the above teams and by December UCF may very well be looking for a new athletic director and a new head football coach which should be a Helluva lesson for head coaches out there that dream of sitting in the ADs chair!
3. Mike London, Virginia – The Losses Keep Coming for Mike London at Virginia with the Cavs losing to Pitt which has a first year head coach in Pat Narduzzi when Mike London is now in his SIXTH season in Charlottesville.
With the loss to Pitt Mike London’s records at Virginia now stand at…
Overall: 24 – 42
ACC: 11 – 30
…and if that can keep you employed at Virginia to the tune of over…
…for FAILING completely at the job we were hired to do!
Now at 1 – 4 on the season Virginia plays at North Carolina next which will be a Helluva tough place for the Cavs to get a win.
Geez…we feel for fans of Virginia football mainly because the LOSING has no end in sight!
4. Paul Rhoads, Iowa State – We don’t know exactly what has caused the bottom to fall out of the Iowa State football program since 2012 when Paul Rhoads took the Cyclones to a postseason bowl game BUT over the past THREE seasons Rhoads’ football team has posted a Big 12 Conference record of…
6 – 23
….and even more shocking the loss to Texas Tech on Saturday was Iowa State’s…
…straight loss to the Red Raiders who historically have had a roughly equal football program to the Cyclones.
Paul Rhoads is a hard-working coach and we assume that nothing has changed with him personally or professionally since 2012 BUT assuming that makes the fall-off of Iowa State football even more of a mystery BUT then suddenly there is the voice of reason filling the room with a Coaches Hot Seat member stating the obvious about the problems of Cyclones football:
“Since 2012 the Big 12 has become a lot more competitive and Iowa State has been standing in place.”
Yep…that has to be it and even with the decline of Texas football the rise of TCU and Baylor has forced other Big 12 schools to make adjustments as well and as Big 12 football teams have raced ahead it looks like Paul Rhoads has been doing the same thing and thus why we see scores like this one from this past Saturday:
Texas Tech – 66 Iowa State – 31
Hell, in 2012 Iowa State beat Texas Tech 24 – 13!
Up next for Paul Rhoads and the Cyclones….
Good Luck with that Paul Rhoads!
5. Mark Richt, Georgia – Mark Richt is a curious case indeed of someone that has…
Underachieved on a Borderline Massive Scale
….while not creating a lot of bad-will in the process which is curious on many fronts but then a Georgia-alum buddy of ours pointed us to an interesting record comparison.
Georgia-Alum Buddy: Look at Mark Richt’s win/loss record in SEC Conference play the last 11 seasons compared to Vince Dooley’s last 11 seasons at Georgia. I think you will find the comparison very enlightening.
OK…below are the win/loss records along with number of SEC Conference and National Titles over the last 11 seasons for Mark Richt and for Vince Dooley during his last 11 seasons at Georgia:
Vince Dooley (1978 – 1988)
SEC Record: 53 – 12 – 2 (.806)
3 SEC Conference Titles
1 National Title
Mark Richt (2004 – 2014)
60 – 26 (.698)
1 SEC Conference Title
ZERO National Titles
Mark Richt’s SEC Conference winning percentage over the last 11 seasons before 2015 is sitting at…
…which is AWFUL at a place like Georgia especially with the kind of money that alums, boosters and fans of Georgia football have been pouring into Athens over the last decade-plus BUT let’s look at Mark Richt’s win/loss record over the past 11 football seasons against the Bulldogs FOUR main SEC Conference rivals…South Carolina, Tennessee, Florida and Auburn:
South Carolina: 6 – 5
Tennessee: 7 – 4
Florida: 5 – 6
Auburn: 8 – 3
26 – 18 (.591)
Damn….a .591 winning percentage against your FOUR main SEC Conference rivals is nothing short of a Complete Freaking Disaster and Oh let’s not forget that Mark Richt is…
2 – 4
….in SIX games played against Nick Saban at Alabama and LSU since Saban and Richt took head coaching jobs in the SEC.
What then should Georgia do with Mark Richt since it looks like that Richt will NEVER lead UGA football team to Promised-Land forget about getting into the College Football Playoff especially when one considers that a….
….winning percentage against South Carolina, Tennessee, Florida, and Auburn over the past 11 seasons is evidently enough for Richt to keep his job?
Our guess…Georgia does NOTHING and UGA football fans will do NOTHING as the Bulldogs stumble to another “little above average season” but again…NOT…a GREAT season and maybe it’s just time for the fans of Georgia football to accept the TRUTH:
Georgia is NOT an elite football program even though Georgia has dozens and dozens and dozens of ELITE football players on its roster!
Up next for Mark Richt and Georgia:
Hell, the way the Missouri offense looks like right even Georgia defensive coordinator Jeremy Pruitt will be able to stop it with his defense which has more holes than the Titanic and is sinking fast until the USS Missouri rolled into town which has a WEAK offense to match the WEAK Georgia defense!
6. Bob Stoops, Oklahoma – Fans of Oklahoma football just have to love the below quote from their head coach Big Choke Bob Stoops after his team got its ass out-hustled and whipped by Texas:
“It surely didn’t start off great,” Bob Stoops said, “but I do feel like we were ready. … I don’t think it was because we were not ready.”
Oh…you’re right there Big Choke Bob….OU was probably “ready” in your own little fantasy world BUT what was apparent to anyone not blind watching the Texas – Oklahoma game on Saturday was that….
Texas opened the game fired-up and ready to play football
Oklahoma opened the game asleep and thinking they were going to roll a Texas team that just got whipped by TCU
Memo to Big Choke Bob Stoops: When it’s Very Damn Obvious that your football team is getting its ass out-hustled and whipped by an opposing team that has NOTHING to do with being “ready” but rather has EVERYTHING to do with the head coach and coaching staff NOT doing their Damn jobs in preparing their football team for an emotional game, and by the time the OU players started giving a Damn which was about the time in our opinion that you Big Choke Bob Stoops started giving a Damn….sometime in the Third Quarter when you figured out, “Hell, we might lose this game to Texas!”….it was far Damn too late Big Choke!
Below is Big Choke Bob Stoops and Oklahoma’s Big 12 Conference record in their last 12 conference games:
13 – 7 (.650)
Is that Oklahoma Football Big Choke Bob Stoops?
Uhhhhhh….that would be a BIG FREAKING NO Big Choke!
….which we have to ask for the fans of Oklahoma football…
Why in the Hell is Big Choke Bob Stoops being paid in excess of $5 Million Dollars when his Sorry….and Lazy Ass in our opinion….cannot even get his team fired-up to play…
Up next for Big Choke Bob Stoops and the Sooners…
At Kansas State
…and we cannot wait to hear Big Choke’s comments after his team loses to the Wildcats….
“I don’t think it was because we were not ready.”
Not that there is anyone above the Candy Ass level at Oklahoma that could do this BUT if we were the athletic director at OU after hearing what Big Choke Bob Stoops said after that Complete Freaking Disgrace of a Game against Texas we would….
Take Big Choke Bob Stoop by the scruff of the neck and lift his ass up off the ground and look right into his eyes and say:
“Listen up you little Bastard…you are being paid over $5 Million Dollars to coach the Oklahoma football team and if you can’t deliver your team to the games ready to play I am going to toss your Sorry Ass out the door or fire your Ass at the airport “Pat Haden-style” whichever is the most Damn convenient!”
Our guess on Oklahoma the rest of 2015:
They will lay down and QUIT just like they did in 2014!
Memo to Head Football Coaches Everywhere: If you ever find yourself in a situation as Oklahoma did on Saturday against Texas when the opposing team is playing a much higher emotionally and effort level than your team and you as a head coach are desperate to win the game….not that we think Big Choke Bob Stoops gives two rips if OU wins another game or not because he’s going to get his $5M Plus whether Oklahoma wins another game which is jus our opinion as American Citizens on Big Choke….then you MUST do something to get your team’s attention and rally your fans and usually that something must be something BIG like arguing a borderline call really hard even if it gets you a penalty flag! Most of all a head coach CANNOT let an opposing team continue to play at a much higher emotionally and effort level while just standing on the sidelines doing NOTHING as Big Choke Bob Stoops did in the OU – Texas game….in our opinion of course as American Citizens and Veterans of the American Republic! Take that and Stuff it Where the Sun Doesn’t Shine Big Choke!
7. Steve Sarkisian, USC – We decided to keep Steve Sarkisian in his original Coaches Hot Seat member voted Post Week 6 Coaches Hot Seat Ranking spot on Sunday because we are…
….at Steve Sarkisian for what has been nothing less than….
Sarkisian’s Outrageous Behavior and Actions
….over the past few years and please save us the harp music on how “Sarkisian needs help because he is going through so much” because we know a Helluva lot of people that have been through things that Sarkisian cannot possibly imagine and they did not drink their asses out of their dream job not that the Clown Show that has become USC Athletics has helped this entire situation since we here at Coaches Hot Seat and many USC alumni have known about issues with Sarkisian going back to the Spring of this year at least!
A few of us here at Coaches Hot Seat first met Steve Sarkisian in either 2000 or 2001 either right when or just before he took a job on Pete Carroll’s staff at USC and unlike the….
Pompous Arrogant Ass Lane Kiffin who in our opinion would sell out EVERY child in America to promote his Own Sorry Ass
….Sarkisian was immediately likeable and did a nice job navigating the difficult job of both working for Pete Carroll and with that Pompous Arrogant Ass Lane Kiffin during those USC years.
We have LOTS of folks here at Coaches Hot Seat that have been drinking alcohol since the late 1970s at least since the drinking age back then was still 18 and although we have had plenty of crazy nights drinking beer and liquor to a man when it comes time to do work whether that work was in the US Military, at the White House, on Capitol Hill or in thousands of private sector positions it was TIME TO DO WORK and just like Sarkisian many of us have been through Very Damn Tough situations where the last Damn thing someone would want to do is start drinking heavily or taking pills or doing anything to take the focus off working through the Damn problems each and every Damn day!
Yes….we are PISSED at Steve Sarkisian and anyone that has been reading the Coaches Hot Seat Blog over the past nine college football seasons has also noticed us referencing “issues” with Sarkisian especially when he was at Washington although we never believed it was anything like what has happened to Sarkisian at USC.
We do hope Steve Sarkisian gets his life straightened-out although we cannot imagine he will coach again at USC or hold any head coaching position for a Helluva long time which brings us to a short story which we hope people in positions like the head football coach at USC will take to heart:
A couple of years ago a member of Coaches Hot Seat got promoted to the CEO position of a medium-sized company and as always he joined us at the annual Coaches Hot Seat Lake Tahoe Clambake in August of each year which includes a good amount of drinking in and around the general public at many different resorts, restaurants, and golf courses on the north shore of Lake Tahoe. What all of us noticed almost immediately with our long-time friend who was now the CEO of a decent-sized company was that he no longer did things in public that would reflect badly on the company he now led and one night we asked him about this and his response was perfect…
“I am the CEO of a company now and my behavior must reflect the values and expectations of employees and company I now lead.”
And a Coaches Hot Seat member added to that: “And you don’t want to get your ass fired for something someone filmed or saw you do in public!”
Bottom-Line Lesson: When you take on the position of CEO or head football coach for that matter your life is no longer just your own because you now are the public face and leader of that company or football team and if you don’t want the responsibility that comes with being the CEO or a head coach then for Damn sure don’t take the job….BUT….if you do take that job have some Damn class and act like a LEADER!
Memo to Steve Sarkisian: Get well son but for Damn sure you let us down and a Helluva lot of other people down and you should be ashamed. The Good News is you can start anew TODAY and build your life from this moment going forward and to do anything else but face and take-on your problems head-on is to be a COWARD and the Steve Sarkisian we know is No Damn Coward! Very simply….Fight Steve!
Good Luck to you Steve
8. Al Golden, Miami – Miami played pretty well against what looks like to us to be just a Slightly Above Average Florida State football team but with that loss to FSU on Saturday Al Golden’s win/loss records at Miami now stand at…
Overall: 31 – 24
ACC: 16 – 17
…and frankly….THAT SUCKS!
Up next for Al Golden a game against Virginia Tech at home in what is of course a CANNOT LOSE game but then EVERY game left on Miami’s schedule in 2015 is a CANNOT LOSE game for Al Golden!
9. Bret Bielema, Arkansas – The Coaches Hot Seat members sitting together in San Francisco watching college football on Saturday couldn’t help but laugh when they saw Bret Bielema run to the locker room at the halftime of the Arkansas – Alabama game thinking he was actually in the game against Bama leading 7 – 3.
A Coaches Hot Seat member actually said watching Bielema: “That Fat Ass actually thinks his team has a chance to win this game! Hilarious!”
Of course, for anyone with a working brain it was obvious that Nick Saban was playing the Arkansas game very low key with the only one of two threats to beat Alabama left on the Tide’s schedule this coming Saturday at Texas A&M (LSU is the only other team on Bama’s schedule it could lose to) and Saban wasn’t about to waste a lot of emotion whipping the Razorbacks when a pedestrian win would both serve his interests to get his team ready for A&M and not stress his team out as they head into a tough stretch of games. Most great football coaches know that a team can only get really HIGH for two maybe three games in each regular season and if you count Ole Miss as one game, A&M will be two games, and LSU will be three games which is why the SEC is such a Helluva tough conference because that still leaves the Iron Bowl against Auburn and the SEC Championship Game!
Getting back to Bret Bielema now in his third season at Arkansas Chubby Boy is sitting on a SEC Conference record of…
3 – 16
….and still has to play in the SEC this season:
Auburn At Ole Miss At LSU Mississippi State Missouri
Damn….could Bret Bielema really be sitting on a SEC Conference record of something like…
5 – 19
….in three seasons coaching at Arkansas?
That’s an average of….
1.67 SEC Conference Wins A Year!
Hell…if were hired as AD at Arkansas tomorrow we would call Chubby Boy into our office and say something like:
“Bielema your ass is now sitting on an SEC Conference record of 3 – 16 and you have five SEC games left to play in 2015. I am going to tell you straight-out….you win less than 3 of the remaining 5 SEC games and I am going to fire your ass on the evening of Friday November 27 in this office because Hell son….we can’t keep on a coach here at Arkansas that can’t win some Damn football games in the SEC! Also, is there some kind of razor shortage I don’t know about here in northwest Arkansas because you look like a Damn bum on the sideline son and if you come into the office tomorrow without shaving I am going to fire your ass right in this office tomorrow morning. Now go find a Damn razor and start winning some football games! Is that clear enough? Good now get your Chubby Ass out of here and Hell it wouldn’t hurt if you missed a few desserts although I am not saying you are fat. OK, I guess telling you to get your “Chubby Ass” out of here means I am saying your fat so you have me on that one!”
10. Mark Helfrich, Oregon – Before Mark Helfrich took over the Marketing and lately Winning Machine that Mike Bellotti and Chip Kelly built at Oregon Helfrich was on the staff of head coaches at TWO Power 5 schools…
Dirk Koetter at Arizona State
Dan Hawkins at Colorado
…and in those EIGHT years that Helfrich was on the above staffs working as an offensive assistant Arizona State and Colorado posted a combined record of….
53 – 58!
Of course, Dan Hawkins had a much worse record at Colorado than Dirk Koetter had at Arizona State BUT both were fired from their head coaching jobs for average or worse than average coaching stints with Mark Helfrich pulling one of the great assistant coaching moves in football history getting out of Colorado only two years before Dan Hawkins was fired at Colorado and landing at Oregon which was just on the upswing under Chip Kelly.
Did Mark Helfrich do anything in his four seasons as an offensive assistant at Oregon to deserve the head coaching job with the Ducks?
Well….Oregon is a little like a Medieval Kingdom in our opinion which is funded by serfs…think people making slave wages across Asia…making Nike products and when Chip Kelly hit the road to take the Philadelphia Eagles job the last Damn thing that was going to happen at Oregon was an open coaching search because to bring in someone from outside the medieval kingdom that didn’t know where all the landmines are located and who you just CANNOT piss off under any circumstance would have been too Damn risky and thus why Mark Helfrich is the head coach at Oregon today.
Sure enough Mark Helfrich kept the machine that Mike Bellotti and Chip Kelly built rolling in his first two seasons BUT there were signs of some small cracks along the way which in 2015 has turned into MASSIVE wide open holes that is for the most part hidden from public view since the Oregon football program is secreted away from fans of Oregon football and everyone else for that matter in a way that would make the Fascist Thugs that ran the USSR jealous if they were still around to see how things operate in Eugene.
Very simply in our opinion….Oregon Football is run by Fascist Thugs that believe a fan taking a picture of the Oregon football team practicing is akin to robbing a bank but the former US Military Intelligence Officer’s here at Coaches Hot Seat aren’t scared of people that are scared of someone who made his fortune making products paying slave wages and then marking up those products 500% plus to sell to the American People that need good jobs at good wages right here in America…and in the struggling state of Oregon for that matter…and from our checking-around Eugene a few weeks back it is our opinion….
The Oregon Football Program is in a Total and Complete Meltdown Right Now
….and the last Damn thing the “Powers That Be” at the University of Oregon would want is a head coach firing and possibly being forced to have to hire a REAL head coach to lead the football team so expect the fall of the Ducks to continue on for awhile….until the King decides he has seen enough…and then maybe current offensive coordinator Scott Frost will be promoted to head coach in true Medieval Kingdom fashion!
Up next for the now former Mighty Powerful Oregon Ducks….
….who we would love to see beat the Ducks and then…
At Arizona State!
Could the now former Mighty Powerful Oregon Ducks be….GASP…..
3 – 5
…when they host California on November 7 with Mark Helfrich coaching for his job in every sense of the phrase “coaching for his job?”
YES is the answer to that question and let us say it is Mighty Damn Fun to watch the Pompous Arrogant Asses both in and around the Oregon football program fall flat on their faces and to that we can only say….
Go Huskies…Whip Those Pompous Arrogant Ass Ducks!
Hell, with Stanford playing UCLA on The Farm on Thursday night we may just have to make the trek up to Seattle on Friday evening to hang-out with our Washington-alum friends and then watch the Huskies whip the Ducks in Husky Stadium on Saturday!
“A desire to be observed, considered, esteemed, praised, beloved, and admired by his fellows is one of the earliest as well as the keenest dispositions discovered in the heart of man.”
“A government of laws, and not of men.”
“All the perplexities, confusion and distress in America arise, not from defects in their Constitution or Confederation, not from want of honor or virtue, so much as from the downright ignorance of the nature of coin, credit and circulation.”
“Because power corrupts, society’s demands for moral authority and character increase as the importance of the position increases.”
“Facts are stubborn things; and whatever may be our wishes, our inclinations, or the dictates of our passions, they cannot alter the state of facts and evidence.”
“Great is the guilt of an unnecessary war.”
“I always consider the settlement of America with reverence and wonder, as the opening of a grand scene and design in providence, for the illumination of the ignorant and the emancipation of the slavish part of mankind all over the earth.”
“I must study politics and war that my sons may have liberty to study mathematics and philosophy.”
“If we do not lay out ourselves in the service of mankind whom should we serve?”
“Let us tenderly and kindly cherish, therefore, the means of knowledge. Let us dare to read, think, speak, and write.”
“Liberty cannot be preserved without general knowledge among the people.”
“Old minds are like old horses; you must exercise them if you wish to keep them in working order.”
“Power always thinks… that it is doing God’s service when it is violating all his laws.”
“There are two educations. One should teach us how to make a living and the other how to live.”
“Tis impossible to judge with much Præcision of the true Motives and Qualities of human Actions, or of the Propriety of Rules contrived to govern them, without considering with like Attention, all the Passions, Appetites, Affections in Nature from which they flow. An intimate Knowledge therefore of the intellectual and moral World is the sole foundation on which a stable structure of Knowledge can be erected.”
“There is danger from all men. The only maxim of a free government ought to be to trust no man living with power to endanger the public liberty.”
“Yesterday the greatest question was decided which ever was debated in America; and a greater perhaps never was, nor will be, decided among men. A resolution was passed without one dissenting colony, “that these United Colonies are, and of right ought to be, free and independent States.”
“There is nothing which I dread so much as a division of the republic into two great parties, each arranged under its leader, and concerting measures in opposition to each other. This, in my humble apprehension, is to be dreaded as the greatest political evil under our Constitution.”
“The consequences arising from the continual accumulation of public debts in other countries ought to admonish us to be careful to prevent their growth in our own.”
“Our obligations to our country never cease but with our lives.”
“As to the history of the revolution, my ideas may be peculiar, perhaps singular. What do we mean by the Revolution? The war? That was no part of the revolution; it was only an effect and consequence of it. The revolution was in the minds of the people, and this was effected from 1760–1775, in the course of fifteen years, before a drop of blood was shed at Lexington.”
“Power always sincerely, conscientiously, de très bon foi, believes itself right. Power always thinks it has a great soul and vast views, beyond the comprehension of the weak.”
“Let the human mind loose. It must be loose. It will be loose. Superstition and dogmatism cannot confine it.”
“This is the most magnificent movement of all! There is a dignity, a majesty, a sublimity, in this last effort of the patriots that I greatly admire. The people should never rise without doing something to be remembered — something notable and striking. This destruction of the tea is so bold, so daring, so firm, intrepid and inflexible, and it must have so important consequences, and so lasting, that I can’t but consider it as an epocha in history!” On the Boston Tea Party (17 December 1773)
“Children should be educated and instructed in the principles of freedom.”
Posterity! you will never know how much it cost the present generation to preserve your freedom! I hope you will make a good use of it.” John Adams, Letters of John Adams, Addressed to His Wife
“People should watch out for three things: avoid a major addiction, don’t get so deeply into debt that it controls your life, and don’t start a family before you’re ready to settle down.”
“I find it a lot healthier for me to be someplace where I can go outside in my bare feet.”
“I don’t read music. I don’t write it. So I wander around on the guitar until something starts to present itself.”
“A concert is always like a feast day to me.”
“Being on a boat that’s moving through the water, it’s so clear. Everything falls into place in terms of what’s important and what’s not.”
“You have to choose whether to love yourself or not.”
“It is a process of discovery. It’s being quiet enough and undisturbed enough for a period of time so that the songs can begin to sort of peek out, and you begin to have emotional experiences in a musical way.”
“The secret of life is enjoying the passage of time.”
“We all have to face pain, and pain makes us grow.”
“Certain things in life are more important than the usual crap that everyone strives for.”
“Sobering up was responsible for breaking up my marriage. That’s what it couldn’t stand.”
“It is the most delightful thing that ever happens to me, when I hear something coming out of my guitar and out of my mouth that wasn’t there before.”
“Music is my living. I enjoy selling my music.”
“I started being a songwriter pretending I could do it, and it turned out I could.”
“It’s probably foolish to expect relationships to go on forever and to say that because something only lasts 10 years, it’s a failure.”
“If I were to try to identify a turning point I’d say that was it – getting clean.”
“Knowing when to quit is probably a very important thing, but I just am not ready.”
“There’ll come a writing phase where you have to defend the time, unplug the phone and put in the hours to get it done.”
“Performing is a profound experience, at least for me. It’s not as if I sit down and play ‘Fire and Rain’ by myself, just to hear it again. But to offer it up… the energy that it somehow summons live takes me right back, and I do get a reconnection to the emotions.”
“Things started to get out of control when I began reading that I was a superstar.”
“If you’re an addict, it controls your life and your life becomes uncontrollable. It’s boring and painful, filling your system with something that makes you stare at your shoes for six hours.”
“Time will take your money, but money won’t buy time.”
“Football in its purest form remains a physical fight. As in any fight, if you don’t want to fight, it’s impossible to win.”
“Morale and attitude are the fundamental ingredients to success.”
“If a team is to reach its potential, each player must willingly subordinate his own personal goals to the good of the team.”
“We compete, not so much against an opponent, but against ourselves. The real test is this: Did I make my best effort on every play?”
“I feel more strongly about this than anything else in coaching: Anybody who lacks discipline, who doesn’t want to be part of the team, who doesn’t want to meet the requirements – has to go. It’s that simple.”
“The man who tried his best and failed is superior to the man who never tried.”
“Losing is easy. It’s not enjoyable, but it’s easy.”
“If you are going to be a champion, you must be willing to pay a greater price.”