COACHES HOT SEAT BLOG

Post Week 7 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

Subbing for Johnny Cash this week is the Great Glenn Frey with his 1980s hit….

The Heat is On

 

Top 10 Hot Seat Coaches – Post Week 7 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

1.  Mike Sherman, Texas A&M – Ok, let’s get this straight.  Texas Tech beat Kansas State 66-14 two weeks ago and then Kansas State turned around and beat Texas A&M 62-14, so does that mean that A&M’s opponent this week is 120 points better than the Aggies?  Maybe so, and that is why Mike Sherman’s rear-end could melt gold about right now!  Mike Sherman is 7-11 in two seasons at A&M (7-11?  Maybe a place where Mike Sherman will be working soon if this keeps up!) and he has won 7 games.  Who has Sherman beat in those 7 games?  Not one team that had/has as winning record in the year he played them and the unfortunate teams on this list of college football titans are:  ‘08 – New Mexico, Army, Iowa State, Colorado – ’09 – New Mexico, Utah State, UAB.  Wow!  Those are some real powerhouse college football programs.  Yes, whether he realizes it or not, Mike Sherman is on the Hot Seat and is not only heading towards what could be a historic beatdown in Lubbock, if the Aggie football team keeps spiraling down, this bad play could really start affecting alumni/booster donations to the university.  A&M is 3-3 and they have Texas Tech, Iowa State, at Colorado, at Oklahoma, Baylor and Texas left and we have a hard time believing that the Aggies will even win 3 of their last 6 games and that would mean 2 losing seasons for Sherman in College Station.  Could Texas A&M possibly bring back a coach in today’s world after two losing seasons in two tries where there are great football coaches around every corner ready to take over football programs?  Remember, we are not talking about PODUNK U. here, but TEXAS A&M!  If they can Texas A&M football does not exist anymore, but that may already be the case, depending on how nice Mike Leach this coming Saturday night.  Right now Mike Sherman’s rear-end is so Hot he could be a nightlight for half of Texas!

2.  Mike Sanford, UNLV – Mike Sanford is now 13 – 41 in his fifth season at UNLV and barring the Rebels winning 4 of their last 5 games, at New Mexico, at TCU, Colorado State, at Air Force and San Diego State, UNLV will have a new coach come this December.  Right now Mike Sanford’s rear-end is so Hot he could light up the Vegas strip!

3.  Greg McMackin, Hawaii – The downward spiral from the June Jones years at Hawaii continues as the Warriors lose another one, this time at Idaho.  McMackin is now 9 – 11 in his second year and we believe that unless he wins 5 of his last 7 games there will be a job opening in Honolulu come December.  Next up:  Boise State.  Good Luck!

4.  Ralph Friedgen, Maryland – Another loss for the Terps and reading the transcripts of Ralph Friedgen’s post-game press conference another week of Friedgen’s befuddlement.  It seems that Ralph Friedgen doesn’t know what is wrong with his football team, which is a very scary thing when uttered by a head football coach and that kind of talk must have the folks in College Park very concerned.  In Ralph Friedgen’s last 68 games he is now 35 – 33 (.515) and if that is an unacceptable record to the people running Maryland athletics, then more power to them!  If on the other hand winning is still important at UM then “we have a problem College Park!”  As for Friedgen’s befuddlement of why his football team is not playing very well we have a newsflash for Ralph:  Your team is playing poorly because it is very poorly coached!  Ralph Friedgen needs to get a big sign with the following on it and put it up in his office:

“If anything goes bad, I did it. If anything goes semi-good, we did it. If anything goes really good, then you did it. That’s all it takes to get people to win football games for you.”  Paul “Bear” Bryant

Ralph Friedgen’s rear-end is so Hot he is rivaling the Hot Air in Washington D.C. these days!

5.  Steve Kragthorpe, Louisville – Kragthorpe is now 13 – 17 in his third year at Louisville and although the Cardinals have shown some flashes of playing better, they still are not playing anywhere near the level that they played under Bobby Petrino.  That is Steve Kragthorpe’s biggest problem, the major difference between the play of UofL under Petrino and their play now and anyone with a working brain can compare the two coaches and see that Kragthorpe is really coming up short and has in fact taken the Louisville football program backwards.  Now at 2-4, Kragthorpe probably needs 4 wins in his last 6 games to keep his job (that’s assuming that Louisville is willing to call 6-6 acceptable, which we would never do at any school under any circumstance in a coach’s third year) and he still has to play at Cincinnati, at West Virginia, at USF and Rutgers, among others….  We don’t see any way Kragthorpe even gets to 6-6 and that means Louisville will be looking for a new coach come December.  This time they need to hire someone that matches the Louisville/Southern+Midwestern culture….  Lots of great coaches out there at would fit that bill… Steve Kragthorpe’s rear-end is so Hot you could light it on fire and he could beat Secretariat’s record around the track at Churchill Downs!

6.  Ron Zook, Illinois – This is getting very ugly in Champaign after the Illini lose another game, this time to Indiana, and they only have 1 win up on the board in 2009 and that win is against Illinois State!  We see so many problems with the Illinois football team, from bad play execution, to lack of effort, to confusion, to all kinds of things, that if Illinois hired Coaches Hot Seat to take over the Illini football team right now we would have to give some serious thought to where we would start.  The really bad news for Illinois is that they may not win another game in 2009 with at Purdue, Michigan, at Minnesota, Northwestern, at Cincinnati and Fresno State left.  Would Ron Zook be fired if he went 1-11 in 2009?  Probably not, unless he totally lost the football team and we haven’t a clue if that is an issue, but whatever happens there are serious problems at Illinois.  Ron Zook’s rear-end is so Hot that he could heat up Lake Michigan to such a temperature this winter that we could all go swimming!

7.  Tommy West, Memphis – With the loss to Southern Miss, Tommy West is now 49-56 (.467) in his ninth year at Memphis and I guess that kind of overall record is acceptable, if you are willing to accept mediocrity that is!  Memphis has traditionally had a strong athletic department, a good basketball program and UM is a pretty good school for its size, but they continue to have a mediocre football program while at the same time Tulsa and Houston have football programs that have in recent years been in or right around the Top 25 on a regular basis.  It is past time for the folks at Memphis to either fish or cut bait.  If West’s record is acceptable, give the guy an extension and tell them to forge on into the world of mediocrity.  If West’s record is not acceptable, then it is time to fire Tommy come December and then hire an up-and-coming coach that can entirely change the culture at Memphis.  Tommy West’s rear-end is so Hot that he could cook all the barbeque in Memphis for the foreseeable future and as anyone that has been to Memphis knows that is a whole lot of B-BQ!

8.  Dan Hawkins, Colorado – If only….  If only Colorado had played like they played against Texas and Kansas when the played Colorado State and Toledo, because we believe that the Buffs would be 4-2 right now instead of 2-4.  Maybe if Hawkins had just started the best QB in fall camp, clearly Hansen over Cody Hawkins, instead of pushing Hansen to “talk to his parents” about redshirting the Buffs would have also had a shot at beating West Virginia.  Of course, we all live in reality not fantasy, and it is too bad that Hawkins did have the Buff football team rolling at the start of the season like it was rolling against the Jayhawks, because this entire mess around Hawkins’ job status could have been completely avoided.  Even with the win over Kansas there is still a lot of improvement that the Buffs can make before they head off to play Kansas State on the road, which by the way, is one of the biggest games of Dan Hawkins career.  If CU can beat Kansas State then they will have an outside shot to get to a bowl game, but with a loss to KSU will bring up the same questions that the Colorado fans have been asking about Hawkins for about 6 weeks now.  Yes, Dan Hawkins rear-end is still Hot and it is so Hot that he could inflate a flying-saucer looking balloon which he could launch from Boulder which would then fly towards the Kansas border and which of course would receive wall-to-wall coverage on the all the cable news channels.  Don’t think the folks at the cable channels are that stupid?  Believe us, some of the densest and out-of-touch with the American people folks on the planet are running these cable news channels!

8.  Paul Wulff, Washington State – Paul Wulff is 3 – 16 in his second year at WSU and the Cougs are sitting at 1-5 with at California, at Notre Dame, at Arizona, UCLA, Oregon State and at Washington left.  Does anyone really believe Washington State will win another game this season?  Didn’t think so and if WSU doesn’t win another game Wullf’s two year record will be 3-22.  We rarely say this, but Coaches Hot Seat could have taken over the Washington State football program two years ago and done better than 3-22 and that reality must scare the hell out of the folks in Pullman!  Paul Wulff’s rear-end is so Hot he could melt all of the snow on beautiful Mt. Rainier!

Mt. Rainier over Seattle

 

10.  Charlie Weis, Notre Dame – So close Charlie, but no cigar!  The fact is that Notre Dame should have been able to beat an average USC team (USC barely beat a weak Ohio State team and lost to Washington and this Trojan team is flat-out average) at home if the Irish really had any juice and now Weis and ND face a situation where they need to win out or Weis’ job status will be up for review come December.  We believe that it is either BCS or bust for Charlie Weis in 2009 and that means the Irish need a Top 8 ranking in the final Bogus BCS poll and it looks like ND will have to run the table in the rest of their games and that might not even do it.  With BC, Washington State, Navy, at Pitt, UConn, and at Stanford left if Notre Dame was a good football team they would steamroll all of those teams, but since we believe the Irish are an average football team we predict they will go 3-3 in their remaining games.  OK, maybe 4-2, but even with a 4-2 finish that adds up 8-4 in ’09 and 8-4 will not meet the requirement of “being in the BCS conversation” that the Notre Dame AD set down last December.  Yes, we are very close to Dandy Don Meredith time in South Bend…..Turn Out the Lights the Party’s (Almost) Over!  Charlie Weis’ rear-end is so Hot that when the Notre Dame AD lets him go Charlie will turn his back to the AD and say:  “Well, at least my ass isn’t on fire anymore!”

After watching replays of college football on Sunday….

Something that we here at Coaches Hot Seat still have not figured out is how a college head football coach can spend an entire Saturday getting his team ready to play, then leading his team in a game and then spend time getting them prepped for the upcoming week on Saturday night and then still be able to put together a poll ranking the Top 25 football teams in the country.  Is it just us or is it incredibly absurd to think that a college head football coach could know anything about teams across the country, save the team that he just played?  Of course it is absurd and incredibly stupid to have a “Coaches Poll” but there are incredibly stupid people that will do anything to prop up the bogus BCS.  Yes, we all know why the Coaches are cowardly trying to hide their poll results from public view, because college head football coaches have a less of a clue where teams should be ranked than any random giraffe plucked off the African continent!

Yes, Grant Teaffe and any coaches that supports the idea of hiding the results of the “Coaches Poll” from the public, the people that are paying everyone salary in the game of college football by the way are…

COWARDS!

Yes, Grant Teaffe you are a COWARD and you also happen to be one of the few COWARDS we have run into from the state of Texas and that should make you doubly-proud! 

Hide the Coaches Vote?  Hell, by the time we get to the bottom of the BCS that will be the least of the worries of the Candy Ass Bastards that have set-up and are running this Bogus and incredibly UN-AMERICAN BCS. 

Yes, there is no way in the world that we here at Coaches Hot Seat with the best technology in the world can see all the teams we need to see between attending and watching games during the week and on Saturday and then watching replays of the games that we have on file on Sunday and Monday.  No chance in Hell, and that makes the BCS polls even more bogus, because we haven’t a clue how these folks in the Harris Poll are voting because….because they are hiding their voting results as well!  We are starting to see a trend here and this entire Bogus BCS is starting to look like the Soviet Union under Stalin.  No way Hell any red-blooded American could be running this Bogus BCS!

Of course, the computer dweebs can come up with their polls by running a program on a computer while they are drinking a Red Bull and eating a Twinkie, but we wish that someone would tell what computer polls have to do with real men playing real football on a real football field.  Answer:  NOTHING, except of course in the BIZARRO world of the BCS where you have Candy Asses from top to bottom with some beauty queens, travel agents, cocktail parties and ticket brokers thrown in for good measure!  What does any of that have to do with playing football?  AGAIN, NOTHING!

We have some news for the Candy Asses out there that think the bowl games are anything like the game of football.  If the regular season is the be-end-to-be-all as the BCS Lovers claim then those folks should show us where during the time before college football regular season games that the players go to theme parks, are sent on shopping sprees, have wing eating contests and get to hit the bars in the nights leading up the game?  Answer for the Candy Asses:  All of that bowl bullshit doesn’t happen in the regular season and that means that anytime a football player is visiting Disneyland and eating pies it is not a real football game and thus we get back to the absurdity of taking 30 days off, visiting theme parks, eating pies, etc., and actually calling any of this nonsense involved with the BCS legitimate.

If you want to send college football players on vacation, send them, but send them on vacation and then call it a football game, because it isn’t, unless of course someone is stuffing greenbacks in your pocket!

A clueless Coaches Poll run by a COWARD, Harris Poll voters that are afraid to show their votes and computer dweebs that are asked serious questions about where teams will be ranked at the end of the season.  Yes, that makes a lot of sense for a way to determine the national champion in college football, that is if you were living in a banana republic run by former Illinois governor Rod Blagojevich!  No, even Blago is not dumb enough to come up with this BCS bullshit!

Everyone have a great week in the American Republic and elsewhere around the world where you are reading this blog from.  If you are in a banana republic reading this blog please let us know if there is someone stupid enough there to both come up with the BCS and also media companies that act like it any of it makes any sense.  Our guess is that even Communist Fidel Castro would call bullshit on the BCS!

Another Glenn Frey tune – You Belong to the City

 

 

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