Daily Archive: November 1, 2023

Post Week 9 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – Give Em Hell Johnny – Welcome To the Hot Seat Dabo “I, I, I, I, and Always I My Ass Is King of the Universe” Swinney

 

Week 9 of the College Football Season is already underway with a game on Halloween Night and that means we are late again in bringing out the Great Johnny Cash to give these Hot Seat Coaches Hell!

Thanks Johnny!

Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

1. Tom Allen, Indiana – Our Expectations for Indiana Football are not very high…

6 Wins A Season and you Get 7 Wins = Great

Tom Allen the last 3 seasons at Indiana…

2021: 2 – 10
2022: 4 – 8
2023: 2 – 6

…is not so Great or even Good and that’s why Tom finds his ass on the #1 Hot Seat heading into the last quarter of the 2023 CFB Season.

At 2 – 6 Tom Allen needs a miracle of sorts to get to 6 Wins by running the table against…

Wisconsin
At Illinois
Michigan State
At Purdue

….and it will Tough for the Hoosiers to win more than 2 of their last 4 games…in our humble opinion!

You might as well go down Fighting Like Hell Tom so Give Wisconsin Hoosier Hell!

2.  Justin Wilcox, California – Cal really should have beat USC on Saturday in Berkeley but like so much of Justin Wilcox’s time at Cal the Bears came up on the short end of the Honey Pot yet again and that leaves Wilcox’s records at…

Overall:  33 – 41
Pac-12:  18 – 36

….and…

8 – 19

…in Pac-12 play the last 4 seasons!

Not Good…Not Good at all and 3 – 5 Cal now has left in 2023 >

At Oregon
Washington State
At Stanford
At UCLA

That looks like 4 or 5 Wins at best in 2023 which would be the FOURTH straight sub .500 record for Wilcox and even at Cal….

That’s Not Good…Not Good At All!

3.  Jimbo Fisher, Texas A&M – The Aggies got the Win over a severely overmatched and totally collapsing Beamer Boy South Carolina team to move to 5 – 3 on the season and now it’s back to Big Boy Football for A&M with a road trip at Ole Miss and let’s be honest here…

In Year 6 on the job at Texas A&M there is just No Damn Excuse for Texas A&M to EVER lose to Ole Miss on the Road, at Home, or Damn Anywhere Else and if the Aggies do lose this game to the Rebels that will tell us just where the Jimbo Fisher regime is at in College Station….

69 Games Into this Fiasco!

Lose to Ole Miss on Saturday and…

Texas A&M is No Damn Better Today than it was when Jimbo took over Texas A&M Football before the 2018 season so…

Don’t Lose This One Jimbo….but then if your ass keeps losing and you can Sit on Your Damn Ass Doing Nothing collecting $77M Large from the Aggie Faithful then Hell losing this game isn’t looking so bad now…is it?

You Got Stupid in this world then you got…Aggieland Stupid!

Aggieland Stupid makes Forrest Gump look like Mensa Member but then Gump NEVER be So Damn Stupid to given Jimbo Fisher this Totally Absurd Contract!

“Momma told me that the Aggies are like a Bunch of Damn Morons!”

Roll Tide!

4.  Dana Holgorsen, Houston – Dana Holgorsen is in his FIFTH Season coaching Houston and so far has…

2 Winning Seasons
2 Losing Seasons

….and the Cougars right now at 3 – 5 on the season with these games left…

At Baylor
Cincinnati
Oklahoma State
At UCF

…needs to win 3 of their last 4 games to avoid Holgorsen having…

2 Winning Seasons
3 Losing Seasons

Uhhhhhh…..3 Losing Seasons when your ass is being paid a Piss-Pot Amount of Money to Win Football Games would be….

Not Good….Not Good At All!

We need a Helluva Lot of Butter and Rolls out here Tilman so hop to it Son and Make It Quick!

5.  Sam Pittman, Arkansas – Overall we would say that Sam Pittman has done a Pretty Decent Job at Arkansas against some Brutally Tough Schedules…especially out-of-conference games….tagged onto the already Tough SEC but we don’t determine the Hot Seat Level of CFB Head Coaches…the Fans of the Teams do…and right now the Hogs Fans are Pissed…Mighty Pissed…and now at 2 – 6 on the season after a Totally Inexcusable Home Loss to Mississippi State Pittman and the Hogs have reached a crossroads of sorts and it’s now…

Put Up Time or Unplug that Jukebox for Good!

Arkansas has left in 2023…

At Florida
Auburn
FIU
Mizzou

…and there’s just No Damn Reason that the Hogs should go less than 2 – 2 in these last 4 games and even 3 – 1 should be achievable but let’s say the Hogs do go 3 – 1 and finish the season at…

5 – 7

…where would that leave Sam Pittman?

In a Very Damn Precarious Situation is where that would leave Sam so Give the Gators Hell in Gainesville like you Got Nothing To Lose because…

Your Ass Has Nothing To Lose Sam!

Great Luck!

6.  Billy Napier, Florida – Talk about a Coach that has Nothing To Lose Ole Billy Boy Napier in his SECOND Season at Florida is now sitting on records of…

Overall:  11 – 10
SEC:  6 – 7

…and we talking about FLORIDA here not Podunk U and the 5 – 3 Gators have left in 2023 >

Arkansas
At LSU
At Missouri
Florida State

We recommend HIGHLY that Billy Boy Napier not lose to Arkansas on Saturday because a Loss in this spot to the Hogs could lead to 4 Straight Losses to end the season and if that happens….really now…

Anything Could Happen and we mean ANYTHING!

7.  Danny Gonzales, New Mexico – You would think almost 40 games into your tenure at New Mexico that your team be Humming Along and Playing Great Football but on Saturday night the Lobos went up to Reno and…

Got Their Asses handed to them by a 1 Win Nevada Team!

Pitiful…Just Pitiful and that now leaves Danny Gonzales record at New Mexico at…

Overall: 1 0 – 29
MWC:  4 – 23

Damn Pitiful…Just Damn Pitiful!

8.  Dave Aranda, Baylor – Talk about Pitiful…44 Games into his tenure at Baylor Dave Aranda’s Bears cannot get up to play a Home Game against a struggling Iowa State team and that drops Baylor’s record in 2023 to…

3 – 5

….leaving 4 games against…

Houston
At Kansas State
At TCU
West Virginia

…and Please Now…how in Hell is Baylor gonna win 3 of those last 4 games and get to We Are Mediocre As Hell Bowl Eligible?

Hell…if Baylor doesn’t show up against Houston and loses on Saturday the folks in Waco should just fire Aranda’s ass on the field after the game because this is…

OVER!

9.  Dabo Swinney, Clemson – There’s a Helluva Lot that could be said about Dabo Swinney going after Clemson Fan Trevor on his radio call-in show Monday Night who dared to criticize…

King Dabo King of the Pompous Arrogant Ass Jerks who Loves to Cry, Cry, Cry and Not Take Any Damn Responsibility

….but we asked a psychiatrist friend of ours who doesn’t follow College Football and worked with a few of us in the President Ronald Reagan Administration to listen to Dabo’s retort to Clemson Fan Trevor and he says to us >

“This guy says “I” more than Donald Trump and Trump is the Most Conceited Pompous Arrogant Ass I ever seen not in a mental institution.”

Ain’t that the Damn Truth and now in this the 17 th season that Coaches Hot Seat has covered the Great Game of College Football we have really only pulled against and hoped he would lose while getting great joy when he got his ass handed to him and that was…

Cheeseburger Charlie Weis at Notre Dame and Kansas

#2 on the Short Damn List of Coaches that Coaches Hot Seat pulls against is now Dabo Swinney and this goes just way behind not liking someone because they believe…

Their Precious Asses Spun Up the Universe, Invented Everything from the Moon and Stars and the Universe including the Game of Football, and really seem to believe that ONLY THEIR ASSES can Win Football Games when…

Bozo the Clown could Win 10 Games A Season at Clemson and Notre Dame

….No…this goes way beyond all of that and is really a fight for…

Right vs Wrong

Good vs Damn Idiocy

Decency vs Total Worthless Arrogance

Dabo Swinney is on the WRONG side of ALL of the above if your ass raised by Parents who taught your ass that saying…

“I, I, I, I, I…I” a Zillion Times

…is WRONG and taking credit for Damn Everything and forgetting The Damn Players who Won all those Games Your Worthless Piece of Crapola Dabo and that’s why…

We Really Do Hope You Fail Miserably Dabo and Your Ass Is Run out of the Game of College Football and Sports in America because You Dabo are a….

Clear and Present Danger to Anyone You Are Coaching or Managing or Doing Damn Anything With

…and let’s just hope…

The Fighting Irish and All Future Clemson Opponents Beat the Living Hell out of Dabo “It’s All My Ass” Swinney!

Memo to Dabo Swinney >

Coach Paul “Bear” Bryant knew what Winning was all about Son and it’s our firm belief having 3 former Alabama Players who played for The Bear at Alabama the 1970s that Bear Bryant…

Would be Ashamed of Your Worthless Ass today Son

….in our humble opinion!

Go to Hell Dabo You “I, I, I, I, I and Always I Does Damn Everything” Damn Fraud!

Anyone that might say in this spot that we have a grudge against Dabo Swinney we will remind folks that care, when Dabo Swinney got the Interim Head Coaching at Clemson we supported the decision to make him the Permanent Head Coach and even know some of the folks that been on Dabo’s staff who were also at Alabama with Dabo so our change of heart is something that has happened in the last few handful of years and we have a Coaches Hot Seat Member from the Birmingham, Alabama area who has a degree from Alabama just like Dabo and known Dabo for 50+ years and after a trip to the South a few years ago he came back and told us…

“Dabo has changed….I am not quite sure what has caused the change but the Dabo of today is not the Dabo I known my entire life and it’s a change for the bad…very bad.”

That same Coaches Hot Seat Member told us last Fall…

“Dabo is getting worse….a lot worse. More Petty, Selfish, Self-Consumed even, and worst of all Arrogant and Condescending and it’s Shameful.”

As Homer Smith used to say Dabo and would tell you today Son >

“Get Yourself Together” and start Dabo with a hard look in the mirror Son!

10.  Will Hall, Southern Miss – The Golden Eagles played the best they played in 2023 before losing to Appy State on Saturday but the 48 – 38 loss leaves Southern Miss at 1 – 7 on the season and Head Coach Will Hall in precarious spot with games left against…

La. Monroe
At Louisiana
At Mississippi State
Troy

Damn…..if Southern Miss can’t beat La. Monroe at Home on Saturday No Damn Chance they win another game in 2023 so it’s Beat La. Monroe or…

Turn Out the Damn Lights….This Is Over!

11.  Butch Jones, Arkansas State – Arkansas State got their Must Win Win on Saturday at home against La. Monroe and now at 4 – 4 on the season and Butch Jones needing 6 Wins to have a chance to keep his job the Red Wolves have left in 2023….

Louisiana
At South Alabama
Texas State
At Marshall

Getting those 2 Wins ain’t gonna be easy….not easy at all so your ass Better Beat Louisiana at Home on Saturday Son!

12.  Ken Wilson, Nevada – Nothing focuses the mind of a Coach more than about to get your ass run and somehow the last 2 weeks Nevada Head Coach Ken Wilson has found a way to get 2 Wins on the board to raise the Wolf Pack’s record to 2 – 6 on the season with these games left to be played >

Hawaii
At Utah State
At Colorado State
Wyoming

Hell….if your ass can beat San Diego State and New Mexico you can beat Hawaii so let’s see if Nevada can get 3 Wins on the board this Saturday against the Warriors!

Let’s Play Football!

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