Tag Archive: Stanford

Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny!

Week 1 of the 2022 College Football Season was interesting alright, but especially interesting for the Coaches on the Hot Seat and has set-up some fascinating games in the coming weeks that could lead to some…

Big Job Openings in 2022

…and with that let’s bring out the Late Great Johnny Cash!

Give these Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny!

Thanks Mr. Cash!

Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

1.  Scott Frost, Nebraska – It’s hard to know what to make of the 2022 Nebraska football team but they seem to be playing a lot like the Scott Frost Nebraska teams of the past few years and seeing that Cornhuskers were tied with North Dakota at half on their home field on Saturday at 7 – 7 one can only Sigh and wonder just where in the Hell this train is going?

Nowhere it looks like to us…Just Damn Nowhere!

Now at 1 – 1 on the season Nebraska has left…

Georgia Southern
Oklahoma
Indiana
At Rutgers
At Purdue
Illinois
Minnesota
At Michigan
Wisconsin
At Iowa

…and a Birdie in Omaha with 2 University of Nebraska degrees on this wall in his office told us this past Sunday that….

“Frost is going to need 7…maybe 8 wins…to come back next season.”

Well…can Nebraska get to 7 wins with the above schedule?

Probably Not and No Chance in Hell Huskers get to 7 wins in 2022 if they continue to play the way they played in the first two games of the season!

2.  Jeff Scott, South Florida – The Hits Keep Coming for Jeff Scott at South Florida with an opening game ROUT by BYU of the Bulls by the score of…

50 – 21

…which drops Scott’s overall record at USF to….

3 – 19

South Florida has left in 2022…

Howard
At Florida
At Louisville
East Carolina
At Cincinnati
Tulane
At Houston
At Temple
SMU
At Tulsa
UCF

Geez…that’s a Tough Schedule and will lead to a…

3 – 9…maybe 4 – 8 at BEST record for USF in 2022 and no doubt if that happens a Very Damn Good Job will come open in Tampa come December!

3.  Geoff Collins, Georgia Tech – Georgia Tech looked against Clemson much liked they looked the 3 seasons…

Not Very Well Coached and Often Confused

We don’t know what is going on at Georgia Tech practices but it ain’t good in our humble opinion and with this left on the Tech schedule…

Western Carolina
Ole Miss
At UCF
At Pitt
Duke
Virginia
At Florida State
At Virginia Tech
Miami
At North Carolina
At Georgia

…there ain’t a chance in Hell of Tech winning more than 4 games in 2022 and a Very Damn Good Job will come open in Atlanta come December!

4.  David Shaw, Stanford – Every since Stanford Football went to…

Total Cream Puff Offseason Conditioning Program

AND

Total Powder Puff Football Practices

…before the 2019 season the Stanford program has been in a Total Damn Freefall and it’s…

No Surprise to Anyone with a 2+ IQ

…because when your ass is running a…

Total Creampuff and Total Powder Puff Operation guess what your ass becomes…

Worthless Candy Asses = Stanford Football Today!

In the last 3+ seasons under David Shaw the Cardinal record now stands at…

12 – 24

…and of those 12 Wins..

Only 4 were against teams with .500+ records!

For all intents purposes…

Stanford Football No Longer Exists on The Farm…it’s just a Big Collection of Worthless Candy Asses that a Sorority Powder Puff Team could whip and make the Cardinal Players like it!

What will happen on Saturday when USC comes to town in the 2 nd game under Lincoln Riley?

The Stanford Cardinal will Huff and Puff and Talk Tough…and then Run and Hide like the Damn Cowards they as they get their asses whipped in their own stadium!

Cue Jed Clampett….

5.  Steve Sarkisian, Texas – We fully expect Nicky Saban to keep a tight reign on his Alabama football team on Saturday and not blow the Longhorns out of their own stadium because mainly what Nick wants to see happen…

Steve Sarkisian to stay at Texas for as long as possible because the Last Damn Thing Nick wants is someone coaching at Texas that knows what the Hell he is doing as they come into the SEC Conference!

We will go a 20 to 24 point win for Bama over Texas which will leave the Horns at 1 – 1 on the season with these games left…

UTSA
At Texas Tech
West Virginia
Oklahoma
Iowa State
At Oklahoma State
At Kansas State
TCU
At Kansas
Baylor

IF and it’s a big IF Texas can beat UTSA in Week 3 it’s still going to be very hard for Texas to get to 6 wins in 2022 with that schedule…..Very Damn Hard!

Could Steve Sarkisian survive posting back-to-back losing seasons in his first 2 seasons at Texas?

laughing,dead,hilary duff,funny,tvland,yas,younger,youngertv,too funny,cracking up

6.  Karl Dorrell, Colorado – Karl Dorrell is a great guy but for the life of us we haven’t a Damn Clue why Colorado AD Rick George hired Dorrell before the 2020 season and after seeing first year Head Coach Sonny Dykes bring his new TCU team into Boulder and whip Karl’s ass in his 3 rd season at CU we gotta wonder Rick…

What Really Son was your ass thinking when you hired Karl Dorrell?

Dorrell is now…

Overall:  8 – 11
Pac-12:  6 – 7

…and has these games left to play in 2022…

At Air Force
At Minnesota
UCLA
At Arizona
California
At Oregon State
Arizona State
Oregon
At USC
At Washington
Utah

If you can find 6 wins for Colorado on the above schedule you are better folks than us!

7.  Scott Loeffler, Bowling Green – In his 4 th season on the job at Bowling Green Scott Loeffler after the loss to UCLA to open the season is sitting on records of…

Overall:  7 – 23
MAC:  4 – 17

…and that ain’t good as someone once said and Bowling Green has left to play in 2022…

Eastern Kentucky
Marshall
At Mississippi State
At Akron
Miami (Ohio)
At Central Michigan
Western Michigan
Kent State
At Toledo
At Ohio

Geez….Cue Dandy Don…

8.  Ken Niumatalolo, Navy – Hey now…Ken Niumatalolo is a great guy but much like David Shaw at Stanford since Kenny Boy went to a…

Total Powder Puff and Cream Puff Navy Football Program

…before the 2020 season he has turned his Navy Sailors into the Biggest Damn Candy Asses this side of the Stanford Football Players who are Bigger Candy Asses than the Navy Players and if the two teams did meet to play a game what we could do is give all of them pillows and they could have a Big Pillow Fight in the middle of the field and then afterwards serve High Tea like the Total Candy Asses both teams are!

Marie Monti GIFs - Get the best GIF on GIPHY

Getting back to Navy if the Naval Academy wants to keep putting Total Candy Asses into the US Navy = The Fleet and mind you there are…

15+ US Navy Combat Veterans who are Members at Coaches Hot Seat

…then fine but don’t come to us crying that The Fleet is filling up with a bunch of Worthless Candy Asses that Ole Kenny Boy is turning out who has posted a record the past 3 seasons of since Kenny went Total Powder Puff + Cream Puff of…

7 – 15

….which includes an opening 2022 season loss at home to…wait for it…

Delaware

Memo to Ken Niumatalolo:  Quit being a Worthless Candy Ass Son and Start Coaching Real Football again at the US Naval Academy!

0 – 1 Navy has left in 2022…

Memphis
East Carolina
At Air Force
Tulsa
At SMU
Houston
Temple
At Cincinnati
Notre Dame
At UCF
Army

Cue Dandy Don for the Worthless Candy Ass Cowards of the Naval Academy Football Team!

Signed,
15+ US Navy Combat Vets at Coaches Hot Seat

9.  Butch Jones, Arkansas State – In Week 1 of the 2022 season Butch Jones and Arkansas State whipped Grambling at home which is like saying they whipped….

AIR!

Now that football season is actually going to start here is what Arkansas State has coming…

At Ohio State
At Memphis
At Old Dominion
La. Monroe
James Madison
At Southern Miss
At Louisiana
South Alabama
UMass
At Texas State
Troy

Maybe Butch Jones can get Arkansas State to 6 wins in 2022….probably not!

10.  Scott Satterfield, Louisville – The turning point and downward slide for Scott Satterfield at Louisville is when he secretly and quickly found out by the media interviewed for the South Carolina job after the 2020 season coming off of…wait for it…

4 – 7 season

…and now sitting on records of…

Overall:  18 – 20

ACC:  12 – 15

…the 2022 season is Satterfield’s Waterloo and every loss will make things just that much difficult starting with the game this coming Friday night at UCF which is a MUST WIN for Scott for Damn Sure and then after UCF the Cardinals still have to play…

Florida State
South Florida
At Boston College
At Virginia
Pitt
Wake Forest
James Madison
At Clemson
NC State
At Kentucky

Geez…if Louisville loses to UCF to start 0 – 2 there’s just no way they win 6 of their last 10 games with that schedule and our guess a year from today or rather before Christmas the Head Coach of the Louisville Cardinals football team will be…

Jeff Brohm

Just a guess!

On to Week 2 and as always…

Let’s Play Football!

The 2022 College Football Season Will Be Coaches Hot Seat 16th Season Covering the Great Game of College Football – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

It’s hard to believe it but the 2022 College Football Season is upon us and Coaches Hot Seat is back for a 16 th year of covering the CFB Hot Seat Coaches and everything else that comes to our minds! 2021 was a tough year here at Coaches Hot Seat losing a couple of folks and one of the Heart + Souls of Coaches Hot Seat going back to early days back in the Fall of 2006 when a few of us came up with the idea of Coaches Hot Seat at The Balboa Café in the Marina District of San Francisco but we are re-energized for the 2022 CFB Season and with that let’s bring out the Great Johnny Cash!

Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny!

Thanks Johnny!

1.  Scott Frost, Nebraska – Hell…we thought by Year 2 that Scott Frost would have Nebraska Football rolling again but the Nebraska Wonder Boy has fallen flat on this face in Lincoln and in 4 seasons on the job is sitting on records of…

Overall:  15 – 29

Big Ten:  10 – 25

….and if that isn’t Total Failure we don’t know what Total Failure and so far Scott Frost at Nebraska has been a…

Total Failure!

The Cornhuskers get things rolling early in 2022 with a game in Dublin, Ireland against Northwestern and talk about…

A Helluva Must Win Game

…this is a Helluva On Steroids Must Win Game for Scott Frost because lose in this spot with these games left…

North Dakota
Georgia Southern
Oklahoma
Indiana
At Rutgers
At Purdue
Illinois
Minnesota
At Michigan
Wisconsin
At Iowa

…there ain’t a Chance In Hell or Highwater or Lincoln that Frost finishes with a Winning Season and Frost at a bare minimum to stay employed in the Great State of Nebraska has to have…

6 Wins in 2022….Hell he probably needs 7+!

Give Em Hell Scott!

2.  Jeff Scott, South Florida – Talk about a Total Failure look at what Jeff Scott has done at South Florida in 2 seasons on the job >

Overall:  3 – 18

AAC:  1 – 14

Bozo the Clown’s pet dog could have posted a better record than what Scott put up the last 2 years at USF and either the boy will get things righted in 2022 or it will over in Tampa!

South Florida 2022 Schedule >

BYU
Howard
At Florida
At Louisville
East Carolina
At Cincinnati
Tulane
At Houston
SMU
At Tulsa
UCF

So a kid that has won 3 games in 2 seasons at USF is gonna win 6 games with that schedule in 2022?

Got Not A Chance In Hell?

Yep!

3.  Geoff Collins, Georgia Tech – We are not sure what the folks at Georgia Tech expected when they hired Geoff Collins 3 seasons ago but it ain’t this…

2019:  3 – 9
2020:  3 – 7
2021:  3 – 9

Overall:  9 – 25

ACC:  7 – 18

This is very simple for Geoff Collins…either get to 6+ wins in 2022 with this schedule…

Clemson
Western Carolina
Ole Miss
At UCF
At Pitt
Duke
Virginia
At Florida State
At Virginia Tech
Miami
At North Carolina
At Georgia

…or it’s Dandy Don Turn Out the Lights the Party’s Over Time!

Got Georgia Tech will have a new head football coach by Christmas?

Yep!

Merry Christmas!

4.  David Shaw, Stanford – The Stanford Folks at Coaches Hot Seat count themselves lucky to have seen the decade long roll that Stanford Football got on between 2009 and 2018 under Jim Harbaugh and David Shaw but now you ask any of them what the Hell is going on on The Farm they will sigh and say…

“It’s a Damn Disaster!”

One Stanford alum at Coaches Hot Seat has gotten to see both Stanford and USC practice in the month of August and his evaluation is…

“USC looks like they are ready to light up the Pac-12 and unleash Hellfire on the Pac-12 and College Football under Lincoln Riley”

AND

“Stanford looks like the Biggest Group of Candy Ass Cotton Candy No Damn Hit Anyone Tea Party Holding Lightweights this side of Pee Wee Herman! Check that…Pee Wee Herman is Tough as Nails compared to these Candy Asses and the last few year’s Stanford team that would be lucky to punch out a hole in a wet In-n-Out bag holding the hamburger and fries that I ate in disgust after seeing Stanford Football practice!”

It Be True…Stanford Football has gone from Winning the Pac-12 and Rose Bowl and 2015 to only 7 years later…

The Biggest Bunch of No Tackling and No Hitting and No Football Playing Candy Asses in America and we have no doubt we could take..

Dozen 50+ year olds down to The Farm and whip the Hell out of David Shaw’s Not A Damn Football Team in a game and in a physical fight after the game and make David and all his Cardinal Candy Asses like it!

The last 3 seasons David Shaw has put up records of…

Overall:  11 – 19

Pac-12:  9 – 15

…and the Cardinal has to face in 2022…

Colgate
USC
At Washington
At Oregon
Oregon State
At Notre Dame
Arizona State
At UCLA
Washington State
At Utah
At California
BYU

Got there is No Damn Chance of Stanford finishing with 6 wins in 2022?

Yep…and if Lincoln Riley and USC comes to The Farm and whips the Cardinal in Week 2 the Damn Team may just flat-out quit on Shaw and Shaw will find his ass fired from his alma mater before the 2022 season is over and if that happens the entire Damn Stanford Athletic Department Leadership will be fired as well because they have let Shaw turn Stanford Football into the…

Biggest Joke West of the Mississippi River in the American Republic that will only get a lot worse in 2022!

5.  Steve Sarkisian, Texas – The Texas Boosters have cranked-up their NIL Machine to help Sark to start landing some talent in Austin but will Sark make it to coach the 2023 season at Texas whether the latest Manning Boy is coming to Texas or not?

Maybe…Maybe Not!

Sark was 5 – 7 in his only season on the job at Texas and No Texas Head Coach has survived 2 straight losing seasons in the modern era of college football and we really doubt that Sark could survive it either so on to the Texas 2022 schedule >

La. Monroe
Alabama
UTSA
At Texas Tech
West Virginia
Oklahoma
Iowa State
At Oklahoma State
At Kansas State
TCU
At Kansas
Baylor

Geez…7 wins….maybe for Texas in 2022!

We could easily see Texas winning only 5 games again in 2022 and how in the Hell could Sark be retained at Texas if he posts losing seasons in his only two seasons on the job?

Not a Chance in Hell Sark could or would coach Texas in 2023 if that happens!

6.  Dino Babers, Syracuse – Dino Babers has 1 Winning Season in his 6 seasons coaching Syracuse and we really doubt that Dino be able to have another losing season coaching the Orange and keep his job so on to the Syracuse 2022 schedule…

Louisville
At UConn
Purdue
Virginia
Wagner
NC State
At Clemson
Notre Dame
At Pitt
Florida State
At Wake Forest
At Boston College

Damn…that’s a HARD football schedule and if Syracuse is not 4 – 1 when NC State shows up to the Carrier Dome on October 15 there’s not a Chance In Hell the Orange get to 6 wins in 2022!

Get Yourself Together Dino!

7.  Butch Jones, Arkansas State – We don’t have any idea why the Arkansas State folks hired Butch Jones a year ago but they did and Butch in Year 1 put up a record of…

2 – 10

Another losing season and Butch is done at Arkansas State so let’s go to the Red Wolves 2022 schedule >

Grambling
At Ohio State
At Memphis
At Old Dominion
La. Monroe
James Madison
At Southern Miss
At Louisiana
South Alabama
UMass
Texas State
Troy

Come on Butch…Bozo the Clown win 6 games with this schedule coaching Arkansas State even if he started 1 – 3!

8.  Jedd Fisch, Arizona – We are still not sure why Jedd Fisch was hired at Arizona but somehow he was and in Year 1 on the job Jedd put up a record of…wait for it…

1 – 11

Let’s look at the Wildcats 2022 schedule to see how long this Fisch Experiment is going to last in Tucson >

At San Diego State
Mississippi State
North Dakota State
At California
Colorado
Oregon
At Washington
USC
At Utah
At UCLA
Washington State
Arizona State

2 Seasons…that’s how long the Jedd Fisch Experiment will last in Tucson!

9.  Tim Albin, Ohio – Taking over a solid Ohio Football program from Frank Solich Ole Tim Albin promptly in Year 1 coaching the Bobcats put up a record of…wait for it…

3 – 9

Just ain’t no way Albin survives if he has another season like that in 2022 and looking at the Ohio schedule…

Florida Atlantic
At Penn State
At Iowa State
Fordham
At Kent State
Akron
At Western Michigan
Northern Illinois
Buffalo
At Miami (OH)
At Ball State
Bowling Green

…just no way Albin is coaching Ohio in 2023!

10. Karl Dorrell, Colorado – In 2 seasons at Colorado Karl Dorrell has posted records of…

Overall:  8 – 10

Pac-12:  6 – 7

…and in what has become a Very Weak Pac-12 Conference and that’s…

Not So Good Karl!

Let’s go to the Buffs 2022 schedule >

TCU
At Air Force
At Minnesota
UCLA
At Arizona
California
At Oregon State
Arizona State
Oregon
At USC
At Washington
Utah

No idea how Colorado gets 6 wins in 2022…just no idea!

Well we are off and running for the 2022 College Football Season and…

Let’s Play Football!

2017 Post Week 4 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – The Stanford QB Situation…Let K. J. Costello Be K. J. Costello and Don’t Turn Him Into A Clone! – Who Doesn’t Love the Great Johnny Cash?

 

Before we get to the Post Week 4 Coaches Hot Seat Ranking Analysis we first must throw out a few comments about the UCLA – Stanford game on Saturday night.

In our opinion if Stanford starting QB Keller Chryst does not get injured against UCLA on Saturday the Cardinal loses to a very Damn average Bruins team with Chryst being replaced by 3 rd string QB K. J. Costello who up to this point has not had enough reps in Stanford practices to have been turned into a Clone by the Cloner Stanford Football Coaches and now we are worried as Hell that the Cloners will turn their full attention to Costello in practice and turn Costello’s rear-end to a Clone as well! The reality is that two great Stanford QBs Andrew Luck and Kevin Hogan did in achieving great success did what K. J. Costello did so well against UCLA which was make plays moving around on the field and not standing like a stick-man in the backfield like Chryst tends to do, and if David Shaw and the Stanford coaches turn Costello into a stick-man then the Cardinal will have a Helluva time even winning 6 games in 2017 so let’s sure the Hell hope they don’t turn Costello into a…

Clone Stick-man

….because Stanford now at 2 – 2 on the season still has a tough schedule to navigate against:

Arizona State
At Utah
Oregon
At Oregon State
At Washington State
Washington
California
Notre Dame

Memo to David Shaw and Mike Bloomgren: Let E. J. Costello be E. J. Costello and stop the Damn Cloner Bullshit at the QB position Boys!

Week 4 was a good week for several head coaches on the Hot Seat but there were several coaches that put themselves into positions where they have very little margin for error in the rest of the 2017 season and with that mind let’s bring out the Great Johnny Cash to send a message to these Hot Seat coaches!

Thank You Johnny Cash!

2017 Post Week 4 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

1.  Bret Bielema, Arkansas – It’s been a long time ago but a couple of Coaches Hot Seat members seem to remember a comment made by Bill Walsh when someone said that a…

“That coach has had bad luck because he is losing a lot of close games”

…to which Coach responded to by saying….

“Why in the Hell is that coach and team playing so many close games?”

The main problem with Bret Bielema at Arkansas is that in his 5 th year the school we don’t have a Damn clue what the Hogs offense is trying to do and the Hogs defense has changed so many times the past 5 seasons that it’s no surprise the players don’t play at any kind of consistent level especially at a level that a defense needs to play to compete and win in the SEC.

To give everyone some kind of perspective at how much Bret Bielema is underperforming at Arkansas look at former Hogs head coach Houston Nutt’s record at the school taking over an equal or worse disaster from Danny Ford (8 – 14 in his last two seasons at UA) than what Bielema inherited from Petrino/Smith:

Houston Nutt – 1998 – 2002

Overall:  39 – 23  (.629)

SEC:  22 – 18  (.550)

Bret Bielema – 2013 – 2017

Overall:  26 – 28  (.481)

SEC:  10 – 23  (.303)

If Bret Bielema and Arkansas won the remaining 9 games on their 2017 schedule to finish at 10 – 2 Bielema would still not even be at the level Houston Nutt posted after 5 seasons at the school and that should tell you all you need to know about how underachieving Bielema has been at Arkansas and with these games left to be played is there anyone that thinks the Hogs are winning out?

New Mexico State
At South Carolina
At Alabama
Auburn
At Ole Miss
Coastal Carolina
At LSU
Mississippi State
Missouri

Our guess based on the way that Arkansas has played under Bret Bielema over the past 54 games the Hogs win….

4 maybe 5 more games

….which at best would give Arkansas a 6 – 6 record in Bielema’s 5 th season in Fayetteville and luckily for Bret he is at a place that…

Celebrates and Pays A Helluva Lot of Money for Average or Worse!

2.  David Beaty, Kansas – David Beaty is in his 3 rd season as the head coach at Kansas and after the loss to West Virginia at home on Saturday he has posted records of….

Overall:  3 – 25

SEC:  1 – 18

…and if that is acceptable to the folks in the Great State of Kansas then…

Bless Their Hearts!

Kansas has games left to be played against…

Texas Tech
At Iowa State
At TCU
Kansas State
Baylor
At Texas
Oklahoma
At Oklahoma State

….and if the Jayhawks win another game in 2017 we will be SHOCKED not that we would be SHOCKED that the folks at Kansas will continue to…

Celebrate Way Damn Below Average

…because after all we are talking about the…

University of Kansas

…which is where…

Average or Worse Meets the Great American Plains!

3.  Mark Whipple, UMass – Mark Whipple and UMass played a solid game against a barely Damn awake Tennessee team in Knoxville on Saturday but another loss is another loss and in the last four seasons being back at the school Whipple has posted a record of…

8 – 33

….and the Minutemen still have to play this season these games:

Ohio
At USF
Georgia Southern
Appalachian State
At Mississippi State
Maine
At BYU
At FIU

UMass, even if they play like they did against the Vols, maybe have 1 or 2 wins on the board at the end of the season and if that is acceptable to the folks at UMass then why should we be mad at those folks for accepting…

Very Damn and even Below Average?

3.  Barry Odom, Missouri – Right now former Mizzou football player and grad Barry Odom is trending as the head coach at Mizzou into very dangerous territory with what looks like to us a football team coming apart at the seams at the exact moment with 16 games under Odom’s belt when the Tigers should be showing signs that Odom’s influence is starting to improve a team that went…

5 – 7

…in Gary Pinkel’s last year at the school in 2015.

Consider the below NCAA rankings among 129 teams for a moment when you also consider that Barry Odom was the defensive coordinator at Missouri and Memphis before taking over the head coaching job at Mizzou:

Total Defense:  107

Rushing Defense:  101

Scoring Defense:  122

Oh…Mizzou is averaging giving up….

40 points per game!

Hmmm…what exactly is going on at Mizzou right now is a Helluva question that we cannot answer since we don’t know any folks really close to the program but from the outside looking in watching the Tigers it’s our opinion…

Barry Odom is not getting anywhere near 100% from his players

…and maybe Odom realizes that and that is why he had that meltdown after getting his team’s ass whipped by Auburn on Saturday and if you are getting less than 100% effort from your players and still have to play the below games you are in a Helluva bad spot!

At Kentucky
At Georgia
Idaho
At UConn
Florida
Tennessee
At Vanderbilt
At Arkansas

What…Mizzou will win probably 3 games in Barry Odom’s second year at the school?

Not good…no make that a…Total Damn Disaster for Mizzou Football!

5.  Jim Mora, UCLA – Several of us at Coaches Hot Seat got to see Jim Mora’s UCLA Bruins up close the other night at the Stanford game and in our opinion it’s pretty easy to see why the Bruins are….

8 – 13

…in their last 21 games under Mora and that is because in our humble opinion…

UCLA is a poorly coached football team that is getting about 60% out of the talent on its roster

Why is that exactly?

We haven’t a Damn clue but from watching the UCLA sideline in the Stanford game we got a whiff of….

“Whatever the Hell happens it doesn’t really matter!”

….and now at 2 – 2 on the season which includes a win over Texas A&M in a game that the Bruins had no business winning UCLA still has left to play:

Colorado
At Arizona
Oregon
At Washington
At Utah
Arizona State
At USC
California

Our opinion…if UCLA plays like it did against Stanford in their remaining 8 games they will be Damn Lucky to win 4 games in 2017!

6.  Butch Jones, Tennessee – We are not quite sure what is going on at Tennessee because watching the UMass – Vols game it looked like the Tennessee players were playing hard against a severely overmatched UMass team which makes us wonder if we have reached the point where Butch Jones coaching is actually taking away from the Vols chance of success instead of adding to it and that goes right to the heart of successful coaching because EVERY coach should add to his players ability to win not taking away from it and the rest of 2017 will show if our opinion is right or not with these games still left on the board for the 3 – 1 Vols:

Georgia
South Carolina
At Alabama
At Kentucky
Southern Miss
At Missouri
LSU
Vanderbilt

Tennessee has plenty of talent to win 9 or 10 games in 2017 with FIVE remaining games at home and road games at Kentucky and at Missouri where the Vols will have a major advantage in talent but how many games will Tennessee win in 2017?

Our guess if they continue to play the way they have so far in 2017:

7 wins

If Tennessee only wins 7 games in 2017 the Vols will be looking for a new head football coach come December.

7.  Kevin Sumlin, Texas A&M – With Kevin Sumlin needing 10+ wins in 2017 to return to coach the Aggies in 2018 he can only wish that he and his coaching staff didn’t totally mismanage the second half of the UCLA games because the Aggies would now be at…

4 – 0

…instead of 3 – 1 but with 3 wins on the board Sumlin still has a chance to get to 10 wins IF the Aggies win 7 of their last 8 games against:

South Carolina
Alabama
At Florida
Mississippi State
Auburn
New Mexico
At Ole Miss
At LSU

Good Luck with that Kevin Sumlin!

8.  Todd Graham, Arizona State – Maybe Todd Graham has figured out with an Arizona State defense that cannot stop ANYONE that the only way the Aztecs are going to win ANY football games is to score a Helluva lot of points and that is what ASU did against Oregon on Saturday scoring…

37 points

…and if Todd Graham is going to save his job he should tell his coaching staff our goal for each game left on the 2017 schedule is to score…

40+ points in EVERY game

…and with Graham needing 7 or 8 wins at least to return to coach the Aztecs in 2018 Arizona State has a chance to move to 3 – 2 with a win over Stanford on Saturday IF they can score 40+ points on The Farm!

How many of the below remaining games can Arizona State reasonably win?

At Stanford
Washington
At Utah
USC
Colorado
At UCLA
At Oregon State
Arizona

If they score 40+ points in all of the above games they can win 5+ games but if they score 30 or less points in each game….maybe 2 or 3 games…so there you go Todd Graham!

9.  Mike Riley, Nebraska – The word from our good and long-time Nebraska-alum friends in Omaha is that anything less than 10+ wins by Mike Riley in 2017 and the Huskers will be looking for a new head football coach in a couple of months and we have been told that potential coaches for Nebraska are already being vetted because the folks at the University of Nebraska know if they do have to make a coaching change this year they…

MUST find the right coach

…because another mediocre to bad hire which can be argued the Huskers have done every time save Frank Solich in the post-Tom Osborne years is what makes next hire at Nebraska so Damn critical!

Now at 2 – 2 on the season with these games left to be played for Mike Riley and Nebraska let’s see if the Huskers can get to 10 wins in 2017:

At Illinois
Wisconsin
Ohio State
At Purdue
Northwestern
At Minnesota
At Penn State
Iowa

We don’t see the Huskers winning out and you know what the Hell that means!

10.  Steve Addazio, Boston College – After the loss to Clemson on Saturday the win/loss numbers in Steve Addazio’s FIVE seasons at Boston College aren’t pretty…

Overall:  25 – 30

ACC:  10 – 23

….and one would think that anything less than 6 wins in 2017 and the Addazio-era will mercifully be brought to an end at BC.

Can Boston College win 5 of their last 8 games in 2017 with the below games remaining?

Central Michigan
Virginia Tech
At Louisville
At Virginia
Florida State
NC State
UConn
At Syracuse

Not a Chance in Hell or Boston!

18 CFB Head Coaches Facing MUST WIN Games in Week 3 – Take It To The Limit Coaches + Teams

 

Week 2 was interesting on the MUST WIN Game front with coaches under lots of the pressure going…

4 – 6

….in their MUST WIN Games which just turns up the HEAT even more on those coaches that lost, and in Week 3 there are 18 CFB Head Coaches facing MUST WIN Games and with that in mind we ask the Eagles and Randy Meisner to motivate these Coaches + Teams To Take It To the Limit to get a win in these games. Bring It Randy!

Thanks Randy!

Rich Rodriguez, Arizona vs. UTEP – Going back to the loss to Washington State at home in 2015 in Arizona’s last 20 games Rich Rodriguez has posted a record of…

6 – 14

…which his nothing short of a Complete Freaking Disaster for Arizona Football and thus after a home loss to Houston there is just No Damn Way Rodriguez and his Wildcats can lose to UTEP in El Paso on Friday night. If Rodriguez did lose this game to an UTEP coach in Sean Kugler who is also on the Hot Seat and has posted a record of 18 – 33 in four-plus seasons on the job then RichRod might as well call the movers on the way back to Tucson because it’s….

….time in the desert!

Mark Whipple, UMass vs. Temple – In the last four seasons Mark Whipple has posted a record at UMass of…

8 – 31

…and one would think sooner or later one would have to start winning some football games to keep your job…even at UMass…right?

Yep…Temple is a MUST WIN Game for Mark Whipple and the Minuteman but we don’t give them much of a chance to win this MUST WIN Game!

Scottie Montgomery, East Carolina vs. Virginia Tech – Scottie Montgomery’s East Carolina football team is in a mini-meltdown with the defensive coordinator being let go and Montgomery off to an 0 – 2 start in 2017 after posting a 3 – 9 record last season and now here comes Virginia Tech showing up in Week 3 in a MUST WIN Game spot is far from optimal, but with a game against USF on deck beating the Hokies is a MUST WIN because a loss here and the Pirates might not win a game in 2017!

Coach against Virginia Tech like your job is on the line Scottie Montgomery…because it is!

David Shaw, Stanford vs. San Diego State – A few Coaches Hot Seat members were at the LA Coliseum for the Stanford – USC game last Saturday and it was apparent in the pregame that the Trojans were JACKED to play the Cardinal and that it was going to take 40+ points to beat USC which Stanford didn’t have in them even if David Shaw had coached the game to score 40+ points…which he didn’t!

Now here come a road game at San Diego State which just beat Arizona State in Tempe and this is truly a cross-roads game for Stanford in 2017 because a loss to the Aztecs means that EVERY team left on the Cardinal schedule can beat Stanford but a win in this spot to improve to 2 – 1 with UCLA and Arizona State at home on The Farm up next Stanford will have a chance to get things rolling in 2017…but first they MUST BEAT San Diego State in what is a MUST WIN Game for David Shaw and his football team.

Be ready a battle boys and if you are not ready to fight…just stay in northern California because the Aztecs will whip and embarrass your asses for all the country to see!

Gary Andersen, Oregon State vs. Washington State – We consider Oregon State to be a school that in today’s world where there are several strong teams in the Pac-12 North Division as a place where a solid head coach will win 6 to 7 games a year and take the Beavers to a bowl game every season. In 14 seasons as the head coach at Oregon State Mike Riley posted a record of…

93 – 80

…and took the Beavers to a postseason bowl game in…

8 of the 14 seasons

…so in our opinion Mike Riley fell short of what Oregon State Football should be especially considering that the Pac-12 North division is a lot tougher division today than it was in the past.

Gary Andersen is a solid football coach but he will have to recruit and coach at a high level to get Oregon State to 6+ wins year in and year out and after a 1 – 1 start that includes getting blasted by Colorado State and barely beating Portland State this Saturday’s match-up with Washington State is a MUST WIN Game with the following games on deck…

Washington
At USC
Colorado
Stanford

Yep…beating the Cougs is a MUST WIN Game for Gary Andersen and the Beavers!

Butch Jones, Tennessee vs. Florida – Butch Jones is a Tennessee player from not making a hustle play in the 4 th quarter against Georgia Tech to cause a fumble giving the Vols the chance to win in overtime and start the 2017 season at 2 – 0 instead of 1 – 1 after a win over Cupcake Indiana State and now the actual season begins for Tennessee with a MUST WIN Game at The Swamp against Florida on Saturday.

If Tennessee did lose to the Gators on Saturday Butch Jones record in SEC Conference play in his last 7 SEC games would drop to…

2 – 5

….and Jones would find his ass heating up again with the 4 following games coming right at the Vols:

Georgia
South Carolina
At Alabama
At Kentucky

Yep….we recommend Butch Jones and Tennessee find a way to beat Florida on Saturday or back up the Hot Seat Rankings Butch Jones will climb!

Jim McElwain, Florida vs. Tennessee – In two-plus seasons at Florida Jim McElwain has posted impressive records of…

Overall: 19 – 9

SEC: 13 – 3

….but this is FLORIDA Football we are talking about here where any coach should be able to drop a few footballs by the practice field and the Gators would win 8+ games a season if the coaches have recruited at all and thus we are going to hold Jim McElwain and ANY Florida Football coach to a very high standard.

The problem for Jim McElwain and Florida after the opening season debacle game against Michigan which exposed a Gators offense that can be easily shutdown is that a loss in this spot to the Vols to drop to 0 – 2 with these games coming up….

Vanderbilt
LSU
Texas A&M
Georgia (Jacksonville)
At Missouri
At South Carolina
UAB
Florida State

….it’s not hard to imagine Florida not getting 6 wins in 2017 with the Northern Colorado game being cancelled and if Jim McElwain doesn’t win 6 games this season he will need to win 10+ games in 2018 or his ass will be sent packing out of Gainesville!

Jim Mora, UCLA vs. Memphis – Most people don’t realize how important..make that VITAL….it was for Jim Mora and UCLA to come back and beat Texas A&M in their opening game because after dispatching Hawaii in Week 2 the schedule gets a lot tougher beginning with a game…

At Memphis

….on Saturday and if the Bruins did lose to Memphis with these games still on the schedule…

At Stanford
Colorado
At Arizona
Oregon
At Washington
At Utah
Arizona State
At USC
Cal

…there’s a decent chance UCLA doesn’t win 6 games in 2017 and BIG buyout or not Jim Mora would probably find his ass out of a job come December after two straight losing seasons in Westwood!

David Beaty, Kansas vs. Ohio – Kansas Football or not we would like to think that a head coach of the Kansas Jayhawks football team could in his…

26 th Game

…as a head coach take his Big 12 Conference Football Team to Athens, Ohio and beat a MAC Conference Ohio University Football Team…right?

Damn Right is the answer to that question!

There just is NO Legitimate Excuse for Kansas Football to lose this game to Ohio on Saturday and thus this is a MUST WIN Game for David Beaty and his football team with these Big 12 games left on the schedule:

West Virginia
Texas Tech
At Iowa State
At TCU
Kansas State
Baylor
At Texas
Oklahoma
At Oklahoma State

Damn….if Kansas loses to Ohio…in our opinion…the Jayhawks will not win another game in 2017 to finish the season at….

1 – 11

…with only a win over SE Missouri State.

Coach em hard David Beaty!

Bronco Mendenhall, Virginia vs. UConn – The Bronco Mendenhall experiment at Virginia which is as much about Bronco not being at BYU as being at Virginia is off to a rough start with a record of….

3 – 11

…on the board two games into his second season at Charlottesville and we are fascinated to see how this all plays out. Bronco Mendenhall is a very good football coach, but he also is a man who like Mitt Romney, who a few of us have run into many times over the years, someone that carries his religion with him to such an extent it dominates his life as much at Catholicism dominated the lives of past head coaches at Notre Dame. We have many Mormon friends in the state of Utah who we visit for at least a week every Summer which includes lots of outdoor activities and sporting contests and we fight like brothers with them to win everything from golf to ping-pong all day long and then at night they go home and we go out to get a few beers at the bars on main street in Park City. We love our Mormon friends because they are not merely “Good People”…they are…”Great People” who are the kind of folks you could always count on if you were ever in trouble and Bronco Mendenhall is cut from the same mold as our friends in Utah, and that’s why it is so fascinating to us to see if Mendenhall can succeed outside of the cocoon that he lived in at BYU…and like it or not BYU is a cocoon…that is somewhat separate from much of American life such as how life is lived in Charlottesville, Virginia.

We are pulling hard for Bronco Mendenhall to succeed at Virginia but after getting beat by Indiana at home last Saturday to drop to 1 – 1 on the season this week’s game at home against UConn is a MUST WIN Game because of what is left on the Cavs schedule:

At Boise State
Duke
At North Carolina
Boston College
At Pitt
Georgia Tech
At Louisville
At Miami
Virginia Tech

With a loss to UConn on Saturday we don’t think Virginia will have any chance at all to get to 6 wins in 2017 with the above schedule so with that mind…

Give the UConn Huskies Heck Bronco!

Mike Riley, Nebraska vs. Northern Illinois – Mike Riley is now in his 3 rd season at Nebraska and he has coached 28 games and posted an overall record of…

16 – 12 (.571)

Below are the records after 28 games of the Nebraska head coaches after Tom Osborne:

Frank Solich: 23 – 5 (.821)

Bill Callahan: 17 – 11 (.607)

Bo Pelini: 20 – 8 (.714)

As anyone can clearly see Mike Riley is 4 th in winning percentage…

Frank Solich:  .821
Bo Pelini:  .714
Bill Callahan:  .607
Mike Riley:  .571

….in the head coaches following the Great Tom Osborne at Nebraska and Riley knows that if he continues along the current path his tenure in Lincoln will not be long.

The thing about coaching at Nebraska is the head coach feels the pressure of the job but he has a hard time finding where that pressure is coming from since the folks in the state of Nebraska are so nice and disarming and just downright decent, but we can tell Mike Riley that after having friends in the Omaha area for over two decades that are Nebraska-alums Riley’s performance to date is something that is discussed on a regular basis and if Riley doesn’t get things going with the Cornhuskers soon…Mike Riley and Nebraska AD Shawn Eichorst will find out who is in charge of things and who can send both of them packing!

After an 1 – 1 start to the season and a decent showing against the Oregon Ducks in Eugene Mike Riley and the Cornhuskers host Northern Illinois in Lincoln on Saturday in the Biggest MUST WIN Game of Riley’s tenure at Nebraska because if the Huskers lose this game at home to Northern Illinois things would heat up in a Helluva hurry on the Great Plains of America!

Oh here is what Nebraska has left after Northern Illinois:

Rutgers
At Illinois
Wisconsin
Ohio State
At Purdue
Northwestern
At Minnesota
At Penn State
Iowa

We have it on good authority that Nebraska fans are expecting 10+ wins in Mike Riley’s third season coaching the Cornhuskers and if you lose to Northern Illinois not only is 10+ wins out the window…..Hell there’s a good chance Nebraska has a hard time winning 8 games if you can’t beat the NIU Huskies at home!

Kevin Sumlin, Texas A&M vs. Louisiana – We don’t give the 23 point underdogs Louisiana much chance to beat Texas A&M on Saturday but if somehow the Ragin’ Cajuns did beat the Aggies at Kyle Field we feel confident in saying that Kevin Sumlin would be fired right after the game because if you can’t beat Louisiana in College Station in Week 2 there’s not a Damn chance in Hell you are going to beat Arkansas in Dallas in Week 3.

Yes…Louisiana is a MUST WIN Game for Kevin Sumlin and Texas A&M but it so unimaginable that the Aggies could lose this game that we should probably call this a….

You Better Damn Win Or Your Ass Will Be Fired Game for Kevin Sumlin!

Brian Kelly, Notre Dame vs. Boston College – As Bob Stoops proved earlier this year college football head coaches either leave of their own volition or their ass eventually gets fired and Brian Kelly at Notre Dame is now heading towards the latter category after a home loss to Georgia, an unnecessary tiff with a reporter after the game, and most important of all now sitting on a record of…

5 – 11

….in Notre Dame’s last 16 games which at a place like Notre Dame is a mark that should have already gotten Brian Kelly fired if the folks making the decisions in South Bend actually gave a Damn about Excellence and Winning!

The Notre Dame at Boston College on Saturday isn’t so much a MUST WIN Game for Brian Kelly as it is a…

Your Ass Better Not Lose It OR Your Head Coaching Career Is Good As Over

….game for Kelly because a loss in this spot to a BC team that under Steve Addazio in the last five seasons has posted an overall record of…

25 – 28

….would be beyond embarrassing and borderline….

“Why the Hell is Brian Kelly still the head coach of the Irish?”

….like moment!

An interesting number of Brian Kelly at Notre Dame over his 8 seasons at the school….the Irish have played 71 games against Power 5 Conference schools and Kelly’s record in those 71 games is…

42 – 29

….for a….

.592

….winning percentage in Power 5 Conference Games.

Is that Notre Dame Football?

Not only NO but…HELL NO!

Steve Addazio, Boston College vs. Notre Dame – As mentioned above Steve Addazio in his fifth season at Boston College and has posted an overall record of…

25 – 28

….which is Below Average at best and Addazio’s record in ACC Conference play is even worse at….

10 – 22

….and after starting the season with a win over Northern Illinois and BC getting its ass whipped by Wake Forest here come the Fighting Irish of Notre Dame in a match-up that is a…

Better Damn Win Game for both Coaches + Teams

…with the losing coach shooting up the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings and the winning coach leaving the game with his ass still on fire!

Great Luck to you Coaches Kelly and Addazio!

Larry Fedora, North Carolina vs. Old Dominion – After opening the season with homes losses to Cal and Louisville Larry Fedora has the North Carolina football team in a Helluva mess and his ass on the precipice of being launched onto the Hot Seat with a loss to Old Dominion on Saturday in a game that North Carolina just CANNOT LOSE forget about the entire MUST WIN Game situation for Fedora.

With Duke up next and then Georgia Tech Larry Fedora better Damn find a way to beat Old Dominion on Saturday or it will be….

Welcome to the Hot Seat Larry!

Barry Odom, Missouri vs. Purdue – Barry Odom has not exactly lit the woods on fire in his first two seasons as the head coach at Mizzou and after starting 1 – 1 in 2017 Odom has records on the board of…

Overall: 5 – 9

SEC: 2 – 7

….and the one thing that Odom does not need at this moment is a team that hasn’t been very good in recent years, think Purdue, that has a new head coach in Jeff Brohm who has the Boilermakers offense rolling and just might come into Columbia and hang 40+ points on the Tigers!

With games coming next against…

Auburn
At Kentucky
At Georgia

….before playing Idaho on October 21 the Mizzou Tigers could be….

1 – 5

….if they lost to Purdue on Saturday which would put Odom’s ass into orbiting the Sun HEAT territory so you better Damn beat Purdue Coach Odom!

Todd Graham, Arizona State vs. Texas Tech – We asked around a bit this week to our friends in the Phoenix area and the word on the street is Graham needs…

8 wins

…in 2017 to keep his job but might be able to return to coach in 2018 if Arizona State wins 7 games this season and those 7 wins include a win over Arizona. With that in mind with ASU now at 1 – 1 on the season and games left against….

At Texas Tech
Oregon
At Stanford
Washington
At Utah
USC
Colorado
At UCLA
At Oregon State
Arizona

….we don’t see any way that the Sun Devils get to 7 wins if they don’t beat Texas Tech on Saturday which = MUST WIN Game for Todd Graham and his football team!

Kliff Kingsbury, Texas Tech vs. Arizona State – In four-plus seasons as the head coach at Texas Tech Kliff Kingsbury has posted the very uninspiring records of…

Overall: 25 – 26

Big 12: 13 – 23

…which you would consider uninspiring if you give a Damn about the Red Raiders fielding a Winning Football Program which Hell…maybe the folks in Lubbock really don’t give a Damn about…but even if they do embrace being…

Totally Damn Average

…in Lubbock one would have to think that if Kingsbury doesn’t win at least 6 games in 2017 his ass is gone…right?

Who the Hell knows since Texas Football all across the Republic of Texas is So Damn Average these days!

Now at 1 – 0 on the season after beating Cupcake Eastern Washington in the opening game the Red Raiders really need to beat Arizona State at home in the second game with this schedule still remaining:

At Houston
Oklahoma State
At Kansas
At West Virginia
Iowa State
At Oklahoma
Kansas State
Baylor
TCU
At Texas

We really don’t see 6 wins on the Texas Tech schedule if they don’t beat Arizona State on Saturday so Yep…you got it…this is a MUST WIN Game for Kliff Kingsbury and the Red Raiders!

Post Week 2 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 21 – 30 Hot Seat Coaches – Keep Giving These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

Keep Giving These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Mr. Cash!

A chair on fire... metaphor "In The Hot Seat"

Post Week 2 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

NCAA Football: Wake Forest at Stanford

21.  David Shaw, Stanford – As a dozen or so Coaches Hot Seat members sat in Stanford Stadium on Saturday night watching Stanford whip Hapless and it seemed almost Coachless UCF an interesting observation was made by one CHS member:

“Is it just me or do the Stanford football players seem to going back to the size physically they were (which was puny) when Walt Harris was run off The Farm and replaced with Jim Harbaugh in 2007?”

This idea that the Stanford football players are getting increasingly smaller under head coach David Shaw compared to the size they were under Jim Harbaugh and in the first couple of years of the Shaw reign has been a topic of hushed discussion for over a year now among a small group of Coaches Hot Seat members which blew-up into a wide ranging discussion on Saturday night with lots of comments thrown in from the peanut gallery like…..

“How small the Stanford football players seemed at fan day in August. Hell, my boy in the ninth grade was bigger than half the Stanford team!”

“How it seems the Stanford football players are losing rather than gaining weight year-over year under David Shaw.”

“Doesn’t it seem like the Stanford football players are less cut, less in shape looking and overall not in the condition they were in during the Jim Harbaugh years?”

What was the final conclusion to this discussion you ask among the participating Coaches Hot Seat members which included a couple of CHS Members chiming-in from their hotel room in Knoxville, Tennessee?

Stanford football IS GETTING SMALLER and LESS PHYSICAL overall under David Shaw and all it takes for one to understand this FACT is for anyone to watch a tape of the Northwestern game from this season to see a smaller team in Northwestern push Stanford around all over the field on the way to a 16 – 6 win over the Cardinal.

Of course, the proof is ALWAYS in the pudding as someone once said and this week Stanford plays at USC which has ALWAYS had larger and stronger players across the board than Stanford but for a few seasons during the Jim Harbaugh years there was a time when USC was flat-out…

Intimidated by Stanford Football

….which culminated in 2009 Stanford – USC game at the LA Coliseum when the Cardinal led Jim Harbaugh team CRUSHED the Trojans by the score of…

55 – 21!

Unfortunately USC has won the last two games in the Stanford – USC series and it will be fascinating to see what the Trojans are able to do with Stanford at the LA Coliseum on Saturday in Steve Sarkisian’s second year as the head coach at USC after narrowly beating the Cardinal 13 – 10 last season on The Farm.

Will Stanford get pushed around by a team in USC that has five to six times as much talent as Northwestern which thoroughly dominated Stanford in the first game of the season or is there something…..anything….that David Shaw can do to get the Cardinal offense on track before the Pac-12 schedule really cranks up with several teams on the schedule that can easily score 30 or more points a game which would leave the pitiful Stanford offense in the dust?

LAColiseum281818

We shall all see on Saturday night with a decent amount of Coaches Hot Seat members traveling to Los Angeles for the Stanford – USC game at one of our favorite venues to watch football games the LA Coliseum which a few Coaches Hot Seat members have been watching football games at for almost 40 years now. Needless to say with the remaining games on Stanford’s schedule as listed below…

At USC
At Oregon State
Arizona
UCLA
Washington
At Washington State
At Colorado
Oregon
California
Notre Dame

….there is a REAL chance that Stanford does NOT win 6 games in 2015 if they play like they did against Northwestern and of course if Stanford doesn’t win 6 games in 2015 Stanford WILL be looking for a new head football coach come December for Damn sure!

22.  Curtis Johnson, Tulane – Curtis Johnson is now in his fourth season coaching the Tulane Green Wave and has posted win/loss records of…

Overall:  12 – 27

CUSA:  9 – 15

….with ONE winning season and bowl game in the books in his first three seasons.

Is Tulane the kind of place that should expect to be playing .500 or better football on a regular basis?

We sure the Hell don’t know why not and after Tulane started the 2015 season with losses to Duke and Georgia Tech the Green Wave has these games left on the schedule:

Maine
UCF
At Temple
Houston
At Navy
At Memphis
UConn
At Army
At SMU
Tulsa

Hmmm…..with the above games remaining is there anyone that believes Tulane will win at least 6 games in 2015?

Didn’t think so which takes us to…

Coach up your team Curtis Johnson or the Hot Seat will just get HOTTER!

KliffKingsbury271717

23.  Kliff Kingsbury, Texas Tech – What a PERFECT opportunity Saturday is for…

Pretty Boy Kingsbury

….to both get Coaches Hot Seat off his back, have us drop the Pretty Boy Kingsbury moniker FOREVER, and get a win for Texas Tech football when the Red Raiders travel to Fayetteville on Saturday to play an Arkansas team that is coming off a loss to Toledo and is according to our buddies in Ft. Smith, Arkansas…

In Total and Complete Disarray Right Now

….with people in Fayetteville pointing fingers at who was responsible for the Toledo loss and therein lies the…

PERFECT opportunity for Pretty Boy Kingsbury and his Red Raiders!

Can Texas Tech really go into Fayetteville and beat an Arkansas team coached by someone (Bret “Ohio State LOVES THEIR CUPCAKES” Bielema) who it seems is more interested in who Ohio State is playing each week (Northern Illinois) than in getting his team ready to play football games?

YES is that answer to that question and a loss in this spot for Bret Bielema to Texas Tech would not only get Pretty Boy Kingsbury OFF the Hot Seat it would send Bret “Anyone seen Urban Meyer eating CUPCAKES today” Bielema into a close orbit around the Sun for the foreseeable future with the SEC Conference schedule still ahead!

Memo to Pretty Boy Kingsbury:  If you score 35 points in this game you will beat Arkansas and YES if you beat Arkansas on Saturday we will drop the Pretty Boy Kingsbury moniker FOREVER! Signed: Coaches Hot Seat

Good Luck Pretty Boy!

LesMiles811818

24.  Les Miles, LSU – With wins over Mississippi State AND Auburn Les Miles has an opportunity to go from the frying pan to the catbird seat if LSU can get a win over a Totally Hapless Auburn team in Baton Rouge on Saturday and consider this for a moment that IF LSU can beat Auburn the Tigers will then have the below games left on their schedule before they play at Alabama on November 7:

At Syracuse
Eastern Michigan
At South Carolina
Florida
Western Kentucky

Hell, if LSU can beat Mississippi State and Auburn we see no reason why LSU can’t roll through their next FIVE games and show up in Tuscaloosa on November 7 at….

7 – 0

….to play the Crimson Tide BUT hold it just a second…after Alabama the Tigers still have to play…

Arkansas
At Ole Miss
Texas A&M

….so even if LSU was 7 – 0 on November 7 Les Miles could still lose his last 4 games and end the 2015 season at…

7 – 4

….and rightfully get his ass run out of Baton Rouge come December!

Up first though before Les Miles possibly gets his ass run out of Baton Rouge in December is the Auburn Tigers in Tiger Stadium and don’t tell anyone Les because what we are about to tell you is just between you Les and us here at Coaches Hot Seat:

Coaches Hot Seat whispering through the computer to Les Miles:  “Our contact at Auburn tells us the Auburn coaching staff is in full-on panic mode right now because they know and Gus Malzahn knows that if Auburn loses to LSU on Saturday and Malzahn drops to 10 – 7 in his last 17 games that Malzahn’s ass will be on fire and on the Hot Seat!”

Good Luck Mad Hatter and OH…if you lose to Auburn at home in Tiger Stadium when Auburn is in “full-on panic mode” your precious ass will be climbing back up the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings!

DanaHolgorsen17171

25.  Dana Holgorsen, West Virginia – Dana Holgorsen and West Virginia got their CUPCAKE win on Saturday over Liberty University which is where that Total Nutcake Bernie Sanders was speaking on Monday but we will say about Bernie Sanders that even though he is a Total Nutcake at least he is a Total Nutcake with personal principles that he sticks to whether you disagree with him or not!

Getting back to Dana Holgorsen and West Virginia Crazy Boy Holgorsen has a chance to get his ass off the Hot Seat next week with a win against Maryland at home on September 26 which would be nice since WVU travels to play at Oklahoma in their fourth game of the season after the Terps come to Morgantown.

For now though with West Virginia having an off-week Crazy Boy Dana Holgorsen remains on the Hot Seat right where Crazy Boy belongs!

KirkFerentz1717171

26.  Kirk Ferentz, Iowa – Kirk Ferentz and Iowa got a nice win at Iowa State on Saturday but then…

Iowa State has LOST 21 of their last 26 games

…so beating Iowa State is akin to beating a Ladies Senior Citizen Bridge Club’s auxiliary football team that meets on every Tuesday night in a suburb of Des Moines, Iowa so we hope that fans of Iowa football aren’t getting too confident after a win over the Cyclones especially with Pitt coming to town on Saturday.

We will tell everyone why a loss to Pitt on Saturday would be especially devastating to Kirk Ferentz and Iowa:

Pat Narduzzi is in his first year as a head coach at Pitt or as a head coach anywhere and if Pat Narduzzi can in his third game as a head coach roll into Iowa and beat the Hawkeyes on the road where exactly does that leave Iowa football under Kirk Ferentz?

Right in the septic tank on the farm is where that leaves Iowa football under Kirk Ferentz!

NebraskaStadium281818

27.  Mike Riley, Nebraska – Several Coaches Hot Seat members have been traveling to the Great State of Nebraska for over two decades on business and thus we have had a long love affair going with Nebraska and the Good People of that state and even when we put Mike Riley on the Hot Seat we have done so reluctantly since Mike Riley is a lot like the Good People of Nebraska in that Riley is almost…

Impossible NOT to like

….but this is Coaches Hot Seat and when you are the head coach at Nebraska you have to win “X” number of games to stay OFF the Hot Seat and thus why this Saturday’s game at Miami is so Damn important for Mike Riley and Nebraska football as they head towards Big Ten Conference play.

Of course, this Nebraska – Miami game is also very important for Hurricanes head coach Al Golden and thus we have set-up here in South Florida a..

Hot Seat vs. Hot Seat Coaching Match-Up

….with the winning coach getting his ass off the Hot Seat for now and the losing coaching getting the heat turned up on his ass Come Monday….

….and no doubt many times in the future during the rest of this college football season as well.

Good Luck to Mike Riley and Al Golden in this Hot Seat vs. Hot Seat Coaches game!

28.  Mike MacIntyre, Colorado – Mike MacIntyre and Colorado got a nice win over UMass at home in Boulder on Saturday and now the Buffs face a CRITICAL game against Colorado State on Saturday which is a match-up that Colorado MUST WIN with the Pac-12 conference schedule looming over their shoulders and with the first Pac-12 game against Oregon in Boulder on October 3.

Can Colorado beat Colorado State on Saturday to get Mike MacIntyre off to a 2 – 1 start with Nicholls State up next which should be 3 – 1 before the Buffs start Pac-12 play against Oregon on October 3?

We don’t see why the Hell not!

LarryFedora81818

29.  Larry Fedora, North Carolina – Larry Fedora and North Carolina got a win over CUPCAKE North Carolina A&T on Saturday and now getting back to Big Boy College Football UNC will host Illinois on Saturday in Chapel Hill which is being coached by interim head coach Bill Cubit.

Yep…North Carolina CANNOT lose to this Illinois team that was in Complete and Total Disarray just a few weeks ago because a loss in this spot to drop to 1 – 2 with the below schedule still looming…

Delaware
At Georgia Tech
Wake Forest
Virginia
At Pitt
Duke
Miami
At Virginia Tech
NC State

…would put both Fedora and the Tar Heels in a precarious position as ACC Conference play gets underway on October 3 with a game at Georgia Tech.

Memo to SPF which is short for Six Pack Fedora here at Coaches Hot Seat: DO NOT LOSE TO Illinois! Signed: Coaches Hot Seat

FrankBeamer81818

30.  Frank Beamer, Virginia Tech – Frank Beamer and the Hokies loaded-up on a CUPCAKE this past Saturday with a win over Furman and now it is back to reality for Virginia Tech with a game at Purdue in Week 3 in what is for Damn sure…

A MUST WIN Game for Frank Beamer and Virginia Tech

….because a loss in this spot to a Purdue football team that has won FIVE total football games the past three seasons would be nothing short of a Complete Freaking Disaster and fully reveal the current….

Hapless State of Virginia Tech Football

….which in what may be Frank Beamer’s last season in Blacksburg is certainly something that Coach Beamer does not want to be fully revealed for all the world to see.

With a game at East Carolina in Week 4 a loss to Purdue might just lead to the Hokies starting the 2015 season at…

1 – 3

….and fighting for their lives just to get to a pitiful bowl game and is a mediocre season and pitiful bowl game really how Frank Beamer wants to go out at Virginia Tech after a legendary coaching career?

NO is the answer to that question and thus YES Virginia Tech had better Damn beat Purdue!

Post Week 2 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 1 – 10 Hot Seat Coaches – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Holy Hell Johnny Cash!

There are just a few reasons why a college football head coach will end up on the Hot Seat and by far the main reason a coach finds his ass on the Hot Seat is…

He did not win enough football games!

But…there are other reasons a college football head coach will end up on the Hot Seat and two of those reasons that we have had to account for in recent years have been…

1.  A Head Coach like Charlie Weis who in our opinion did not give a Damn about coaching the Kansas football team in the proper way which also makes Charlie Weis a Sorry Excuse for a Human Being….with that being the opinion of EVERY American here at Coaches Hot Seat

AND

2.  Coaching like a Scared Coward which is how four SEC head coaches coached their teams on Saturday….

Butch Jones, Tennessee
Bret Bielema, Arkansas
Steve Spurrier, South Carolina
Gus Malzhan, Auburn

….with three of the above COWARD COACHES now finding their precious and COWARDLY asses on the Hot Seat for their COWARDLY behavior because they lost their games and Auburn head coach Gus Malzhan now just one loss away from finding his ass on the Hot Seat with Auburn playing at LSU this coming Saturday! Besides coaching in a COWARDLY way which clearly in our opinion ALL FOUR of the above SEC head coaches did on Saturday what really pisses us off here at Coaches Hot Seat is when head coaches who have guaranteed contracts that will pay them Millions of Dollars whether they win or lose so they will never have to work a day the rest of their lives…

Still Coach like COWARDS!

It was just Shameful and a Disgrace to the American Republic forget about an embarrassment to the SEC that head coaches…

Butch Jones, Tennessee
Bret Bielema, Arkansas
Steve Spurrier, South Carolina
Gus Malzahn, Auburn

….were on Saturday…just so Damn SHAMEFUL!

We will get more into the COWARDLY behavior of head coaches….

Butch Jones, Tennessee
Bret Bielema, Arkansas
Steve Spurrier, South Carolina

…in the Post Week 2 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings Analysis BUT is it just us here at Coaches Hot Seat or is everyone else thinking the same thing?

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The Southeastern Conference reached its PEAK at the same time that Paul Finebaum was negotiating the contract for his book in New York City in the spring of 2013 for what eventually became this….

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….and after the past two college football seasons and especially this past weekend has become what historians will mark as the Beginning of the End of the SEC? Of course, anyone that knows Paul Finebaum knows that Paul has a stellar record of latching onto public figures just before they are sent off to prison so Finebaum signaling the end of the SEC with his Idiotic book would not only be the MOST right thing in the world it would make a Helluva lot of sense also!

A chair on fire... metaphor "In The Hot Seat"

Let’s bring out the Man in Black to…

Give These Hot Seat Coaches Holy Hell Johnny Cash!

Post Week 2 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 1 – 10 Hot Seat Coaches

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1.  Paul Rhoads, Iowa State – Cyclones head coach Paul Rhoads is on a pretty bad run of late and the loss to Iowa over the weekend on Iowa State’s home field by a score of…

31 – 17

….didn’t help matters and just by comparison over Paul Rhoads last 26 games coaching ISU he has posted a record of….

6 – 20

…and the previous head coach at Iowa State Dan McCarney posted a record over his last 26 games at ISU of…

12 – 14

….and also by comparison puts the winning percentages of Rhoads and McCarney at…

.231 for Paul Rhoads in last 26 games at ISU

.462 for Dan McCarney in last 26 games at ISU

Sorry, but Paul Rhoads can be the nicest and hardest working guy in the world and by all accounts we have heard he is both BUT we caught some of the Iowa – Iowa State game on Saturday and to put it bluntly…..

Iowa State DOES NOT look like a very well coached football team right now…PERIOD.

Oh….up next for Iowa State…

At Toledo which just beat Arkansas in Fayetteville!

Good Luck with that Paul and here’s a tip…don’t complain this week like some kind of LOSER about Ohio State’s schedule when you have a team to get ready to play Toledo!

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2.  Mike London, Virginia – Mike London’s Virginia football team had Notre Dame right where they wanted the Irish on Saturday…

Up by a point with just a few minutes to play with the Irish starting QB out and a back-up QB in for Notre Dame that had hardly played at all in a meaningful live college football game

….and how exactly did Mike London’s Virginia team find a way to lose this time around?

By allowing that back-up QB that had next to no experience throw a ball to a receiver that was allowed to get behind a defensive back for some reason which ended up with a touchdown!

Geez…you really cannot make-up some of the stuff that has happened to Virginia football in recent years BUT this loss to Notre Dame takes the cake, the pie and every Damn dessert in the kitchen and with that loss London’s record at UVA dropped to…

Overall:  23 – 40

ACC:  11 – 29

…over the last six seasons which is bad from whatever direction one looks at those records.

Up next for Virginia…

William & Mary
Boise State
At Pitt

Our recommendation to Mike London = WIN all three of those games son!

3.  Doug Martin, New Mexico State – Oh, you thought it was a big deal that the Florida Gators beat New Mexico State 61 – 13 on Week 1?

Uhhhh….NOT….because Georgia State which had won ONE football game the last two seasons just beat New Mexico State on their home field!

This is Doug Martin’s third season as the head coach at New Mexico State and his record at NMSU now stands at:

Overall:  4 – 22

Enough said on the Hot Seat situation at NMSU!

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4.  Darrell Hazell, Purdue – Darrell Hazell and the Purdue Boilermakers got their first win of the 2015 season over Indiana State on Saturday which means about as much as a grizzly bear crapping in the woods of Yellowstone National Park meaning it means NOTHING AT ALL!

The 2015 college football season begins again for Darrell Hazell and the Boilermakers on Saturday with Virginia Tech coming to town and this is a game in our opinion that….

Purdue Should Win

….IF Purdue plays with the same intensity that they played with against Marshall in Week 1.

In the “Just By Comparison” department Darrell Hazell has now been the head coach at Purdue for 26 games and his win/loss record stands at…

5 – 21

….and the coach he replaced at Purdue who was fired and run out-of-town posted a record in his first 26 games at Purdue of….

10 – 16

….which should tell everyone that is paying attention why exactly Darrell Hazell is on the Hot Seat!

5.  Derek Mason, Vanderbilt – Vanderbilt looked OK at times against Georgia on Saturday but in the end a loss to the Dawgs by a score of…

31 – 14

…..leaves Derek Mason’s win/loss record in his second season at Vandy now at….

3 – 11

…and let’s hope Mason’s record after this coming Saturday’s game against Austin Peay is…

4 – 11

….or Mason might not make it as head coach at Vandy to the Ole Miss game in Oxford on September 26!

Looking over the rest of Vanderbilt’s 2015 schedule…

Austin Peay
At Ole Miss
At Middle Tennessee
At South Carolina
Missouri
At Houston
At Florida
Kentucky
Texas A&M
At Tennessee

….if Vandy improves just a little bit more as the season progresses MAYBE the Commodores can win…

4 Games in 2015

….which would be an improvement by ONE win over 2014 and would give Mason one more year in Nashville to get Vandy back to their “James Franklin-years” winning ways and with that Derek Mason now has his goal for 2015….

4 Wins!

Coach ‘Em Up Derek!

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6.  Kevin Wilson, Indiana – Kevin Wilson and the Indiana Hoosiers beat Florida International on Saturday by the score of 36 – 22 and when one considers that FIU had won….

6 Games

…the last three seasons combined Indiana beating FIU meant about as much as a wild pig finding an acorn in Alabama which means that win over FIU means NOTHING AT ALL!

Up next for Kevin Wilson and Indiana….a very tough Western Kentucky team that is very simply a…

CANNOT LOSE game for Kevin Wilson and the Hoosiers but especially a CANNOT LOSE game for Kevin Wilson!

7.  Paul Petrino, Idaho – In Week 2 Paul Petrino’s Idaho team lost to USC in Los Angeles by a score of…

59 – 9

….and with that loss Petrino’s win/loss record at Idaho now stands at….

2 – 23

…..which is a winning percentage of…

.080%

….and the last Idaho head coach Robb Akey got fired at Idaho after posting a winning percentage of…

.286%

…over 6 seasons and thus why Paul Petrino is clearly on the Hot Seat!

Up next for Idaho….

Wofford!

OK…this should be a WIN for sure for Paul Petrino and the Vandals!

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8.  Ron Turner, Florida International – After seeing in person an average Stanford team made of balsa wood whip UCF on Saturday night we now understand how FIU beat UCF in Week 1 and thus it was no surprise to us that an average Indiana team beat FIU on Saturday.

FIU has won…

6 Games

…in three seasons under Ron Turner and FIU should get its SEVENTH win under Ron Turner on Saturday when they play

NC Central

….not that anyone here at Coaches Hot Seat has a Damn clue who in the Hell NC Central is!

We do know that Ron Turner’s ass is on the Hot Seat whether Dave Wannstedt of Fox Sports thinks Turner’s ass is on the Hot Seat or not!

Memo to Dave Wannstedt:  Ron Turner’s precious ass is on the Hot Seat and FIU beating UCF in Week 1 was No Damn Big Deal!

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9.  Butch Jones, Tennessee – The two Coaches Hot Seat members that traveled to Knoxville on Saturday for the Oklahoma – Tennessee game saw the same thing that the other 100-plus Coaches Hot Seat members saw watching the Sooners – Vols game on TV and that was….

Tennessee head coach Butch Jones had the Sooners on the ropes for much of the game and if not for COACHING LIKE A COWARD and COACHING NOT TO LOSE the Vols could have delivered the knockout punch to Oklahoma many times in the game and when you COACH LIKE A COWARD your precious ass ends up on the Hot Seat and that is where Butch Jones finds his precious ass on this Monday morning!

Oh by the way….below are Butch Jones win/loss records at Tennessee which make a Helluva lot more sense now after seeing him COACH LIKE A COWARD in the Oklahoma game:

Overall:  13 – 14

SEC:  5 – 11

Sorry Butch Jones…we don’t give a Damn if you inherited a wreck of a football program from the combo of Lane Kiffin and Derek Dooley because IF you are going to the head coach at Tennessee and a head coach in the SEC you first and most importantly must…

NOT COACH LIKE A COWARD!

As Coaches Hot Seat members discussed the outcome of the Oklahoma – Tennessee game on Saturday night after watching a day of college football and that Badass Madison Bumgarner almost throw a perfect game against the San Diego Padres two things were mentioned the most about Butch Jones’ coaching performance against Oklahoma:

1.  Butch Jones COACHED LIKE A COWARD and in many ways COACHED SCARED against Oklahoma on Saturday

AND

2.  Butch Jones clearly DOES NOT trust his quarterback Joshua Dobbs because there were numerous instances in the first and second half of the game against the Sooners where Butch Jones and his new and OLD offensive coordinator could have unleashed Dobbs on OU and put the game out of reach of the Sooners BUT Butch Jones didn’t do that which brings to mind a quote from the Great Bill Walsh on quarterbacks that one of us heard Coach Walsh say a Helluva long time ago:

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Bill Walsh:  “If you don’t trust your quarterback to make plays and decisions on the field then you don’t have a quarterback and you don’t have a leader. A head coach must prepare his starting quarterback to the best of his ability and then trust his quarterback on gameday. To do anything but that would lead me to believe that a team either has the wrong head coach or wrong quarterback….or both. A head coach must trust his quarterback because that trust is fundamental to playing winning football.”

YES….we miss Coach Walsh and YES there are dozens of college football head coaches across America that DO NOT TRUST their quarterback and SHAME on them for that idiocy!

Sorry Butch Jones BUT it was YOU that cost the Tennessee Vols that game against Oklahoma because very simply Butch Jones you…

COACHED LIKE A COWARD….PERIOD.

Up next for Tennessee…

Western Carolina

…which is a SURE win and then COWARD Butch Jones and the Vols play…

At Florida

…and we would recommend that Butch Jones NOT COACH LIKE A COWARD against the Florida Gators because if the Vols lose to the Gators again….

Your ass Butch Jones and thus YOU will find yourself on the Face of the Sun!

SunEarthOh!

 

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10.  Bret Bielema, Arkansas – A few Coaches Hot Seat members had been watching a tape of the Toledo – Arkansas game on Sunday and after watching things for awhile someone said check the box score on the game for Arkansas and after doing that what about these numbers for the Hogs offense?

Arkansas ran the ball 31 times for 103 yards

Arkansas threw the ball 53 times completing 32 for 412 yards

What in the Freaking Hell Bret Bielema?

So the working theory in Fayetteville must be that Arkansas can run the ball against SEC West teams but not a team from the MAC Conference? Is that right Bret Bielema who seemed in the last week very Damn concerned about Ohio State’s schedule and not the Hogs opponent which just whipped your team’s ass in Little Rock Bret and landed your ass back on the Hot Seat in the process!

YES…like Butch Jones…Bret Bielema COACHED LIKE A COWARD on Saturday but it was a different kind of COWARDICE that Bielema brought out against the Toledo Rockets….it was COWARDICE plus STUPIDITY because if Arkansas had not panicked and had just ran the ball down Toledo’s throat instead of throwing the ball all over the lot they could have won by two touchdowns but instead like in Knoxville and in Columbia…

COWARDLY behavior by the head coach won the day

….and with that COWARDICE the SEC now has FIVE head coaches on the Hot Seat….

Derek Mason, Vanderbilt
Butch Jones, Tennessee
Bret Bielema, Arkansas
Steve Spurrier, South Carolina
Les Miles, LSU

….and if the COWARDLY coaching continues at least three of the above head coaches will NOT be coaching their teams in 2016!

OhioStateChamps111

Memo to Bret Bielema:  This week Bret focus on getting your football team ready to play against Texas Tech because in case you didn’t know it your win/loss records at Arkansas of…

Overall:  11 – 16

SEC:  2 – 14

….are NOT the records that should lead to a head coach popping-off about ANYTHING relative to other football teams around the country especially the Defending National Champions in Ohio State which BEAT Alabama in the Semi-Final Playoff Game in case you forgot Bret!

Oh….lose to Texas Tech Bielema and your ass will be like the Persian Gulf region the last time a dozen or so Coaches Hot Seat members were in it during the spring and summer of 1991 for Desert Storm which was….

Hotter than Hell!

cc: Jeff Long, Arkansas Athletic Director

10 College Football Head Coaches That CANNOT LOSE In Week 2 – Steely Dan Singing Deacon Blues – Bob Stoops and the “Hungry Meter” for College Football Head Coaches

We are introducing a new feature at Coaches Hot Seat for the 2015 football season and beyond…the….

10 College Football Head Coaches That CANNOT LOSE In Week “X”

…..and to introduce this feature we will use a song from the 1970s Super Band Steely Dan…

Deacon Blues

“They got a name for the winners in the world….I want a name when I lose…they call Alabama the Crimson Tide….call me Deacon Blues…Deacon Blues.”

Enjoy the GREAT Steely Dan singing Deacon Blues!

10 College Football Head Coaches That CANNOT LOSE In Week 2

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1.  Kevin Wilson, Indiana vs. FIU – After the close 1-point win over FCS team Southern Illinois in Week 1 there is just no way in Hell that Kevin Wilson’s Hoosiers can lose to FIU at home this week because a loss in this spot to a pitiful team from South Florida…

No…not the Miami Hurricanes

…would send Wilson’s ass into a part of the Universe that is Hotter than our Sun and last time we checked the Sun is pretty Damn HOT!

PaulRhoads83883 (1)

2.  Paul Rhoads, Iowa State vs. Iowa – In Paul Rhoads last 25 games at Iowa State his Cyclones have posted the downright startling and depressing win/loss record of…

5 – 20

….and rightly so Paul Rhoads’ ass is now hotter than that coffee that some Idiot spilled on himself and sued McDonald’s about years ago and won BIG which we seem to recall was Pretty, Pretty Hot Coffee which means a loss in this spot to the Iowa Hawkeyes and fellow Hot Seat coach Kirk Ferentz would be nothing short of a…

Complete Freaking Disaster!

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3.  Kirk Ferentz, Iowa vs. Iowa State – Consider this in the Total Disaster that Iowa Football has become in recent years under the $4 Million Dollar Per Year Man Kirk Ferentz:

In Iowa’s last 40 games the $4 Million Dollar Per Year Man Kirk Ferentz has posted a win/loss record of…

20 – 20!

That’s right the University of Iowa….or rather the fans of Iowa Football and in many ways collectively college football fans across America that watch all of these college football games on TV have collectively paid Kirk Ferentz over the past four football seasons something on the order of….

$15 Million Dollars

….for 20 Stinking Wins which works out to the amazing number…

$750,000 Per Freaking Win!

Seriously…you CANNOT make this kind of stuff up and thus why Kirk Ferentz and his Iowa Hawkeyes CANNOT lose to Iowa State on Saturday because if they do the above number goes up to….

$800,000 Per Freaking Win!

Hell, if Kirk Ferentz keeps up this Mediocre Football at Iowa by the end of the 2015 college football season he could be getting paid something on the order of…

$1,000,000 Per Freaking Win!

…and that’s good money IF you can find people STUPID enough to pay that kind of money for MEDIOCRITY which Kirk Ferentz has found in the state of Iowa IN SPADES!

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4.  Charlie Strong, Texas vs. Rice – Anyone that has read the Coaches Hot Seat Blog over the past EIGHT college football seasons knows that we have some good fishing and hunting buddies in the Austin, Texas area who are Texas grads and love showing us “City Boys” what life is like in the Republic of Texas while hunting and fishing and every so often we haul those “Texas Boys” up to Montana to show them what life is like when you really go into backcountry where the trout are large and the grizzly bears will eat your ass if you are not careful!

Getting back to the subject at hand which is….

The Rolling and Raging On Fire Wagon Train

WagonBurning

…that is now Texas football we asked our Austin fishing and hunting buddies what the temperature was down in Texas relative to Charlie Strong and Texas football and their replay was…

“Let’s just say that if Texas loses to Rice on Saturday night Charlie Strong’s house could be on the market and sold before the Horns play Cal the next Saturday!”

Uhhhhh….we would call that the temperature of some wings we used to eat at a chicken wing place in Jacksonville Beach, Florida when a few of us were serving in the US Navy that were the Hottest Damn Wings we have ever put in our mouths and the very simple one word name for those wings was:

“Chernobyl”

This is very simple….Charlie Strong and Texas CANNOT lose to Rice on Saturday night…PERIOD.

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5.  Al Golden, Miami vs. FAU – If there is ONE coach in college football that knows he MUST produce in 2015 meaning win a Helluva lot of football games it is Miami’s head coach Al Golden and in Week 2 Golden and his Hurricanes play Florida Atlantic on Friday night and a loss in this spot with these SIX games up next…

Nebraska
At Cincinnati
At Florida State
Virginia Tech
At Clemson
At Duke

…would be nothing short of a Complete Freaking Disaster and send Al Golden’s ass onto the face of an O Class Star which in case you didn’t know…

OClassStar888

Is One Helluva Hot Place for your ass to be sitting on!

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6.  Les Miles, LSU vs. Mississippi State – We don’t have any fishing and hunting buddies in the state of Louisiana but we have heard that if LSU loses to Mississippi State on Saturday night that Les Miles will not be traveling back to Baton Rouge with the LSU football team but will instead be taken immediately to Cape Kennedy in Florida where several influential LSU boosters have arranged to have Les Miles and his ass launched on a NASA rocket to…

Calvera the closest neutron star to Earth which is approximately 250 to 1000 light-years from Earth

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….which it will take The Mad Hatter several million years to reach and we have also heard that in order to really stick-it-to Les Miles during the entire trip to Calvera those LSU boosters have arranged it so Les Miles will be forced watch a continuous loop replay of the January 2011 BCS Title Game loss to Alabama which most agree was the…

Boringest College Football Game of All Time!

Memo to Les Miles:  Don’t Lose to Mississippi State!

NCAA Football: Wake Forest at Stanford

7.  David Shaw, Stanford vs. UCF – A few Coaches Hot Seat members were on a conference call this week with a “non-athletic related contact” of ours on the Stanford campus who keeps his ears to the ground for us on The Farm since we have to work for a living and cannot hang around the Stanford Athletic Complex and whip the football team into shape which this Stanford football team needs desperately and our “non-athletic related contact” at Stanford said something very Damn interesting on our weekly conference call:

“If Stanford loses to UCF on Saturday there is a very good chance that Stanford doesn’t win 6 games this season because of how fragile and weak this team is and how tough the remaining schedule is.”

Hmmmm….this Stanford football team is “fragile and weak?”

Yep…that was our opinion of the Stanford football team we saw in August on The Farm although our term of…

Balsa Wood Stanford Candy Asses

…for this the 2015 Stanford football team seems to be a little more on the nose to us!

Let’s look at Stanford’s remaining games in 2015

UCF
At USC
At Oregon State
Arizona
UCLA
Washington
At Washington State
At Colorado
Oregon
California
Notre Dame

Yep…if Stanford cannot beat UCF which just lost to FIU on their home field then…

There is NO WAY IN HELL that Stanford gets close to 6 wins this season which would further validate what we have seen happen in recent years that has turned the once Very Damn Tough Stanford Football Program into the…

Balsa Wood Stanford Candy Asses

…that will fold-up like a cheap tent bought from Wal-Mart if even the slightest gust of wind hits the campground on The Farm in this case!

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YES….UCF is a CANNOT lose game for Stanford head coach David Shaw but then when the cake has already been mixed and baked there isn’t a Helluva lot that one can do to that cake once it is sitting on the counter of the kitchen!

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8.  Mike Leach, Washington State vs. Rutgers – With Washington State about to look down the pipe of NINE Pac-12 Conference Games that will ALL be very difficult wins for the Cougars if there is a game that Mike Leach and his WSU football team needs to win it is this Saturday’s game against Rutgers because a loss in this spot to fall to 0 – 2 on the season and it will next to impossible for Washington State to get to 6 wins in 2015 and that would make…

Three Out of Four Losing Seasons for Mike Leach at Washington State

YES…beating Rutgers is CRITICAL for Mike Leach and the Cougs!

Bob Stoops

9.  Bob Stoops, Oklahoma vs. Tennessee – There is no doubt in our minds that Oklahoma head coach Bob Stoops would like to get the Sooners back into the running for a National Championship before he is politely told that his services are no longer needed in Norman since being just a little better than average is eventually not going to cut it at OU even for Bob Stoops, BUT when you talk to people around Norman and we mean folks that have some insight….not total insight but some insight….into what is going on the feeling that used to pervade Oklahoma football under Stoops….

That Dammit We ARE Going To Win Big 12 Championships and National Titles or Die Trying

….just NO LONGER EXISTS in Norman and there in a nutshell is what is wrong with OU football.

We are always coming up with new ways to rank college football head coaches here at Coaches Hot Seat and one way we came up with this past Summer was the “Hungry Meter” meaning on a 1 to 10 scale how “Hungry” is EVERY college football head coach to win Games, Championships and National Titles either at his current school or a bigger school if a great job opportunity presented itself. We have been tossing around the idea of publishing our opinion on the “Hungry Level” for each college football head coach BUT it is such a subjective opinion based on admitted less-than-perfect information we have held it back….so far.…BUT we will tell you of what “Hungry Level” we have OU head coach Bob Stoops at on a 1 to 10 scale to win Games, Championships and a National Title with the Sooners which is of course just our opinion:

Bob Stoops was a “10” on the “Hungry Meter” from 2001 to 2008

Bob Stoops was a “9” on the “Hungry Meter” from 2009 to 2011

Bob Stoops was an “8” on the “Hungry Meter” from 2012 to 2014

Bob Stoops current rating on the “Hungry Meter” = 7.8

In our opinion here at Coaches Hot Seat ANY college football head coach who has a rating of less than “9.5” on the Coaches Hot Seat “Hungry Meter” in today’s incredibly Damn competitive college football landscape has NO DAMN CHANCE to win a Conference Championships and National Titles.

NeylandStadium

Two Coaches Hot Seat members will be traveling up from Atlanta to Knoxville on Saturday for the Oklahoma – Tennessee game and they will report back on what they see from Bob Stoops and the Sooners….and our guess is….OU loses to Tennessee and ends up with 7 or 8 wins on the season and Bob Stoops is DONE at Oklahoma come December either in reality meaning no longer the head coach at OU or just a coach going through the motions hauling down millions of dollars a year for “X” number of years into the future.

Just our opinion.

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10.  Brian Kelly, Notre Dame vs. Virginia – Of course both Brian Kelly and Virginia head coach Mike London BADLY need a win in this spot BUT this is a game that Brian Kelly CANNOT lose after the Week 1 crushing of the Hapless Texas Longhorns that are still the Texas Longhorns even though they are now Hapless with a Capital “H” under Charlie Strong! With Georgia Tech coming to South Bend a week from Saturday a loss in this spot will not only dash the hopes of Irish faithful all over the country but would set-up the biggest game of Brian Kelly’s career at Notre Dame because a loss to Virginia followed by a loss to the Yellow Jackets at home would more than likely be a irreversible stake into Kelly’s future unless the Irish ran the table the rest of the way and there CANNOT be a Human Being alive on the Earth that believes the Irish could pull that off!

Our guess….Notre Dame whips Virginia just as UCLA did in Week 1….BUT if the Irish flop-around and lose this game to the Cavaliers Brian Kelly might as well travel on down to Cape Kennedy and get on that rocket with Les Miles that is headed to the closest neutron star because South Bend will be a terrible place to be next week even if Kelly will have to watch along with Miles a continuous loop of the 2011 BCS Title Game between LSU and Alabama which thankfully for ALL college football games was So Damn Boring it gave us the College Football Playoff!

Launch of Atlas V GPS IIF-4 from Cape Canaveral AFS

Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 21 – 30 Hot Seat Coaches – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

A chair on fire... metaphor "In The Hot Seat"

Give these Hot Seat Coaches Hell Mr. Cash!

Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

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21.  Frank Beamer, Virginia Tech – The Hokies played a decent game against Ohio State on Labor Day night but is “decent” what Virginia Tech football is all about now or are Va. Tech fans still serious about winning games and championships in Blacksburg?

Well, let’s go to Frank Beamer’s records over the past four seasons and see what just “decent” looks like at Virginia Tech:

2012 – 2015

Overall: 22 – 18

ACC: 12 – 12

Yep….that is BARELY just “decent” for Virginia Tech football especially when the records that Frank Beamer was putting-up while coaching the Hokies between 2004 and 2011 which makes us naturally wonder…

Just what in the Hell has gone wrong in Blacksburg because these records…

Overall: 22 – 18

ACC: 12 – 12

…just flat-out SUCK!

With the 0 – 1 start let’s go to what remains on Virginia Tech’s schedule to see if this indeed may be Frank Beamer’s last season in Blacksburg because just “decent” cannot continue in Hokieland….right?

Furman
At Purdue
At East Carolina
Pitt
NC State
At Miami
Duke
At Boston College
At Georgia Tech
North Carolina
Virginia

Geez…that’s a pretty tough schedule and there is a very REAL chance that Virginia Tech doesn’t win SIX games in 2015 and we cannot imagine that Frank Beamer will be coaching the Hokies in 2016 if they post a losing record this season unless of course Coach Beamer is not willing to go out with a losing record in his slamdunk College Football Hall of Fame coaching career and demands at least one more season.

We shall see….BUT if Virginia Tech loses at Purdue and/or at East Carolina in the coming weeks the 2015 season for the Hokies could get very Damn ugly in a hurry!

Bob Stoops

22.  Bob Stoops, Oklahoma – We had heard that Bob Stoops got a little testy after a lot of questions at his press conference this week about the potential of the large and very loud crowd at Tennessee’s Neyland Stadium having an adverse impact on the Sooners this coming Saturday so we had our former US Navy Intelligence Officer and now Coaches Hot Seat member look at a tape of Stoops’ Monday press conference to get his take on Bob’s level of concern about Neyland Stadium and here is what he came away with:

Video

“Very simply Bob Stoops is worried about the crowd at Neyland Stadium especially how the noise level of the crowd could get Oklahoma off their game early on and lead to mistakes that could lead to Tennessee getting a lead that might be too much for the Sooners to overcome to win the game. Just a guess, but I think Bob Stoops and the OU coaching staff are just hoping to weather the storm in the first quarter and not fall more than 2 scores behind at the most.”

So Bob Stoops is worried about the potential of the Tennessee crowd at Neyland Stadium having an adverse impact upon the Sooners especially early-on in the game against the Vols BUT then what is really at stake in this Oklahoma – Tennessee game for the Sooners?

Since it seems Oklahoma is no longer in the…

Winning A National Championship Business

..under Bob Stoops and things in Norman seem to be about trying to get to 10 wins so a decent bowl game can be delivered to the Sooner faithful so a loss in this spot to Tennessee really is…

No Big Whoop!

….because OU can find 9 more wins on their regular season schedule after the Vols….right?

Tulsa
West Virginia
Texas – Dallas
At Kansas State
Texas Tech
At Kansas
Iowa State
At Baylor
TCU
At Oklahoma State

Maybe…Maybe Not…but Hell Bob Stoops can keep coaching Oklahoma for as long as he wants winning 8 games a year so would it matter if the Sooners won 8 games again in 2015 and then got their asses whipped in a bowl game?

Not Really and thus why Tennessee should beat Oklahoma on Saturday because the TRUTH is…

This game means a Helluva lot more to Butch Jones and the Volunteers than Bob Stoops and the Sooners

….in our humble opinion of course.

As we write the above a few Coaches Hot Seat members remember back to another time when losing a football game was a…

Complete Freaking Disaster

….to Bob Stoops and the Sooners and one game in particular stands out in our minds and that was the Oklahoma at Oregon game at Autzen Stadium in Eugene, Oregon on September 16, 2006 which those Coaches Hot Seat members watched from the Oklahoma sideline.

Oh, that was a great football game between the Sooners and Ducks with Oklahoma being royally ripped-off by some Pac-12 refs at the end on a BOGUS call on an onside kick! Enjoy and go to the 2:45 mark in the below video to see the Bullshit against the Sooners begin!

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23.  Willie Taggart, South Florida – Willie Taggart and his South Florida Bulls got a win over Cupcake Florida A&M in Week 1 BUT now Willie…the REAL work begins! Check-out South Florida’s next four games!

At Florida State
At Maryland
Memphis
Syracuse

Geez…if USF is 2 – 3 after their fifth game they will be lucky and thus that is your charge Willie Taggart….

Be 2 – 3 at least when you take USF to UConn on October 17!

Can South Florida win at least 5 more games in 2015 with the below remaining games still to be played?

At Florida State
At Maryland
Memphis
Syracuse
At UConn
SMU
At Navy
At East Carolina
Temple
Cincinnati
At UCF

We don’t see why in the Hell not?

Coach up those Bulls Willie!

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24.  Dana Holgorsen, West Virginia – Dana Holgorsen and West Virginia got an impressive win in Week 1 over what should be a pretty good Georgia Southern team by a score of…

44 – 0

…and Liberty is up next so that means the 2015 college football season doesn’t really begin for Holgorsen until WVU plays Maryland on September 26 in Morgantown.

Until then Dana Holgorsen will be cooling his heels on the Hot Seat!

One interesting side-note we ran across the below interesting article in Morgantown Magazine about Dana Holgorsen’s house in Morgantown:

Tall Timber: The home of WVU’s Dana Holgorsen is the first luxury residence in the U.S. to be built completely of cross-laminated timber, Laura Wilcox Rote, Morgantown Magazine

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Oh, one particular comment at the bottom of the article on Dana Holgorsen’s house in Morgantown by Sara Perfin caught our attention here at Coaches Hot Seat!

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25.  Ron Caragher, San Jose State – Ron Caragher and San Jose State got their Cupcake win in Week 1 over New Hampshire but check-out what the Spartans have coming up next!

At Air Force
At Oregon State
Fresno State
At Auburn

WOW!

Got 1 – 4 to start the 2015 season Ron Caragher?

You are about to Ron so you better Damn make hay in 2015 in Mountain West Conference play!

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26.  Mike Riley, Nebraska – Although we wish Mike Riley nothing but the best at Nebraska we have a sneaking suspicion that Riley’s tenure in Lincoln is going to be….

A Gosh Darn Complete Freaking Disaster

….and we don’t know if Nebraska could have found a worse way to open Mike Riley’s tenure than to lose a game that would have been a win if ONLY…

ONE Nebraska player would have made a Freaking Play on that Hail Brigham Young Pass!

OK….0 – 1 is not too bad and South Alabama is up next which Nebraska SHOULD win easily and then it’s a trip to Miami to play the Hurricanes in a Hot Seat vs. Hot Seat Coaching Match-Up that will send one coach….

Soaring Off the Hot Seat

AND another coach

Soaring Up the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings!

Until Saturday September 19 and that Nebraska – Miami game in Miami we will leave Mike Riley alone BUT for Dang sure Mike….

Don’t Lose to South Alabama for the Pillsbury Dough Boy’s Sake!

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27.  Brian Kelly, Notre Dame – Notre Dame whipped Texas in Week 1 by a score of 38 – 3 but then whipping Texas these days is like a fat man saying he just destroyed a chocolate cake which means that…

Any Damn Decent Football Team in America Could Whip Texas!

AND

Any Random Fat Man in America Could Destroy A Chocolate Cake!

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Now at 1 – 0 Notre Dame travels to play Virginia in Charlottesville and although this looks like a BIG mismatch this is the EXACT kind of game that Brian Kelly has lost in his tenure with the Irish…

Games that Brian Kelly SHOULD win…he often loses….in spectacular fashion!

Come on now…Notre Dame is not going to lose to a Virginia team that under Mike London has put up FOUR losing seasons in the last FIVE years….right?

Well…if Notre Dame did lose to Virginia on Saturday Brian Kelly would wake-up next Monday morning with…

His Ass on the No. 1 Hot Seat in America!

28.  Paul Haynes, Kent State – Paul Haynes is in his third season now as the head coach at Kent State and has put up records of….

2013:  4 – 8
2014:  2 – 9
2015:  0 – 1

Overall:  6 – 18

MAC: 4  – 11

YES…the above kind of records will land your ass on the Hot Seat and after an opening season loss to Illinois Paul Haynes and his Golden Flashes play Delaware State on Saturday in a MUST WIN game before having to travel to play the future 2015 Big Ten West Division Champion in our opinion……Minnesota.

Now that Paul Haynes is on the Hot Seat for the first time we would like to welcome Paul Hayes to the Hot Seat and here’s to getting your ass off the Hot Seat soon Paul!

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29.  Norm Chow, Hawaii – How about the Hawaii Warriors opening up the 2015 college football season with a win over Pac-12 member….

Colorado Buffaloes

…..to which we can only say..

Congrats Norm Chow!

Oh….Hawaii plays….

At Ohio State!

…in Week 2!

Damn!

Here’s the good news….after Ohio State the Hawaii Warriors play…

UC Davis!

….and then….

At Wisconsin
At Boise State!

Damn Norm Chow! Who is making these schedules for you there in The Islands?

Attila the Hun?

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Good Luck against Ohio State Norm Chow!

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30.  George O’Leary, UCF – When we saw the below story about George O’Leary wanting to step-down as the head football coach at UCF and become the AD at the school at the end of the season…

George O’Leary wants to stay on as athletic director at Central Florida, Dan Wolken, USA Today

…some Bastard here at Coaches Hot Seat said to no one in particular:

“Hell, if George O’Leary wants to be the UCF athletic director he needs to step-down right now because if he is thinking about such a move no doubt he is not putting everything into coaching his football team in 2015.”

And then this….

FIU – 15
UCF – 14

Evidently that Bastard Coaches Hot Seat member was right because George O’Leary’s UCF football team just got beat by a team in FIU that very simply…

Had No Damn Business Beating UCF

….which brings us back to this point:

If George O’Leary wants to be the AD at UCF then he should quit coaching the Knights football team right now

…because things don’t get any easier in Week 2…

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Hold it a second…UCF plays the Balsa Wood Stanford Candy Asses next on The Farm and Hell if you just show up and pop the Balsa Wood Stanford Candy Asses in the mouth they will go home crying to their Momma so maybe George O’Leary can get things back-on-track for UCF in Week 2 with a win over the…

Balsa Wood Stanford Candy Asses

….and get his ass of the Hot Seat in the process!

This should be great fun on The Farm this Saturday with…

The Balsa Wood Stanford Candy Asses playing their first home game on The Farm in 2015 after embarrassing Stanford University and themselves at Northwestern in Week 1

AND

George O’Leary making calls from the sideline during the game to someone…who the Hell knows who….to see if he has been named the AD at UCF yet!

What happens exactly when….

Balsa Wood Stanford Candy Asses meets an opposing team that has a head coach that is working on his next job which in this case is the athletic director position at UCF?

We don’t have a Freaking Clue but we are all about to find out and Hell when you combine Balsa Wood with a head coach looking for another job it promise to be…

A Great and Fun Day on The Farm!

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Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – 11 – 20 Hot Seat Coaches – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny Cash!

A chair on fire... metaphor "In The Hot Seat"

Give these Hot Seat Coaches Hell Mr. Cash!

Post Week 1 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

11.  Paul Petrino, Idaho – Now in his third season at Idaho head coach Paul Petrino has posted a record of…

2 – 22

…which includes an opening 2015 season loss to Ohio by a score of 45 – 28.

YES…2 – 22 will land your ass on the Hot Seat and that is exactly where Paul Petrino is at and has been for years now!

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12.  Ron Turner, Florida International – We are not quite sure how FIU beat UCF in Orlando on Thursday…more on George O’Leary who is now on the Hot Seat due to the loss to FIU in a bit…but a win is a win and a win over UCF moves Ron Turner down the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings BUT if Turner is going to get off the Hot Seat for good he will need more than 4 wins in 2015 and HELL if you can beat UCF in Orlando you can beat a pitiful Indiana team in Bloomington this coming Saturday….right?

RIGHT!

NCAA Football: Wake Forest at Stanford

13.  David Shaw, Stanford – Dozens of Coaches Hot Seat members were in the San Francisco Bay area and around Stanford University for work and various professional educational things in August so many of us were able to take-in and size-up the Stanford football August preseason camp and by the third week of August a consensus had been reached that we came very close to publishing in the Coaches Hot Seat Blog that we held back on because….WELL….maybe we were wrong and why send out alarms to Stanford’s first opponent Northwestern about potential problems with Stanford football so we kept our mouths shut.

After seeing in person and watching on TV the Stanford – Northwestern game this past Saturday we can now say….

WE WERE NOT WRONG!

….about the Complete Freaking Disaster that we were watching unfold in August on The Farm which has led to the…

Complete Freaking Disaster that is Stanford Football right now!

Let’s quickly summarize what several Coaches Hot Seat members saw in August with Stanford football by quoting a CHS Member on what he thought of the Cardinal’s August camp practices:

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“If you held all of Stanford’s August football practices in a balsa wood house not only would the balsa wood house still be standing there would not be one dent in any of the balsa wood!”

What the Hell does the above mean exactly?

Stanford Football NO LONGER PLAYS FOOTBALL under head coach David Shaw but rather Shaw just holds pillow fights among the players so the…

Candy Ass Coaches and Candy Ass Players can act like they are football players when in FACT

….any random sorority football team from any university in the country could whip the Hell out of the….

Candy Ass Coaches and Candy Ass Players that call themselves Stanford Football!

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On top of Stanford Football players being Candy Asses that are coached by Candy Asses did anyone else catch the Stanford offense against Northwestern?

Got there are Thousands of Pee Wee football teams across America that not only hit harder but are better coached and more sophisticated than the Stanford offense right now?

What a Complete Freaking Joke Stanford Football is right now and in our opinion the current state of Stanford Football goes straight to the head coach David Shaw who also in our opinion…

Wouldn’t know an honest day’s work if it hit him in the ass!

No David Shaw…sitting in your office listening to jazz music is NOT working IF you are the head coach of the Stanford football team which by the way you have turned into the…

Biggest Group of Candy Asses in the American Republic today!

Congratulations David Shaw you should be Mighty Damn Proud of Yourself because you are going to do the Next Too Damn Impossible….

Be handed a championship football program from Jim Harbaugh and less than three years later be now sitting on a record over your last 15 games of…

8 – 7

….and headed towards getting your precious jazz listening ass run right off The Farm!

Up next for the Candy Asses in Cardinal:

UCF this coming Saturday on The Farm which just lost to FIU at home!

Here’s a thought:

The Stanford football coaches and players should all get in their best Sunday dresses out and find some nice pillows from the nearby Macy’s at the Stanford Shopping Center for the UCF game and do what they best and love so very much in style…

Have a Pillow Fight!

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Fear the Tree? No…not any longer on The Farm!

Fear the Pillows being swung by the Candy Ass Coaches and Players on the Stanford NOT A Football Team anymore!

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14.  Les Miles, LSU – Let’s give the award…

Thank God Almighty that those Idiots weren’t around during World War II

…to the LSU athletic department that could not find a way to move a game one day forward to Sunday after the McNeese State – LSU game was cancelled on Saturday which lots of…

Flunky Paper Pushers in the LSU Athletic Department

….couldn’t somehow do who no doubt would be selling apples on the local street corner if they weren’t working in athletics where morons can hang around forever whether they are actually good at their jobs or not who and couldn’t just say this simple Damn thing:

“Sorry Folks….the McNeese State – LSU game is cancelled…see everyone back here at Tiger Stadium tomorrow for a 5PM for kick-off.”

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Would the above had meant that the McNeese State football team would have driven the 130 miles back to their campus in Lake Charles to spend the night and driven back to Baton Rouge on Sunday for the game?

YES….Big Freaking Deal!

Would the above have meant that LSU Athletics would have spent a few extra hundred thousand dollars in overtime for people working in and around Tiger Stadium?

YES…Big Freaking Deal!

Would the above have meant that LSU athletic administrators otherwise known as Precious Candy Ass Paper Pushers would have had to do some extra work over the weekend?

YES…Big Freaking Deal!

Bottom-Line: LSU Athletics is run by Complete Freaking Morons that cannot move a football game…..A Freaking Football Game…one day forward!

YES…it is true…there are Complete Freaking Morons in position of authority all over America right now and LSU Athletics is a prime example of that FACT!

Getting back to Les Miles the LSU Tigers now open the season at Mississippi State and if Les Miles’ football team loses that game…

Expect your ass to be the temperature in the Bayou on a HOT August Day Les Miles!

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15.  Kliff Kingsbury, Texas Tech – PBK’s….Pretty Boy Kingsbury…football team at Texas Tech got a 59 – 45 win over FCS team Sam Houston in Week 1 which means about as much as a grain of sand being washed into the ocean and in Week 2 the Red Raiders play UTEP at home in a game that very simply…

PBK…Pretty Boy Kingsbury….CANNOT LOSE

….with Arkansas in Week 3.

Oh…Arkansas beat UTEP in Week 1 by the score of 48 – 13 so everyone here at Coaches Hot Seat will be watching this UTEP – Texas Tech game and score very closely!

Good Luck to you PBK!

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16.  Steve Sarkisian, USC – USC whipped an overmatched Arkansas State team in Week 1 and the Trojans play a very weak Idaho team in Week 2 and then USC gets…

The Balsa Wood Candy Ass Pillow Fight Boys of Stanford in Week 3

….so USC should EASILY be 3 – 0 when they head to play Arizona State in Tempe on September 26.

As for Steve Sarkisian and his recent “troubles” we can only say to Steve….

Focus on Family and Football Steve and keep the Focus there….PERIOD.

17.  Larry Fedora, North Carolina – North Carolina looked better…especially the UNC defense under Gene Chizik…than the Tar Heels looked in 2014 BUT the OLD Ball Coach’s South Carolina team looked AVERAGE at best so was UNC’s performance against the Gamecocks something to be impressed with or just….whatever?

In our opinion….WHATEVER….because there are probably some high schools team in the South that could whip the South Carolina team that the OLD Ball Coach ran out onto the field in Charlotte!

Coming up for Larry Fedora and North Carolina:

NC A&T
Illinois
Delaware

Hell…North Carolina SHOULD be…

3 – 1

…when go to Atlanta to play Georgia Tech on October 3!

If not…Larry Fedora knows where he will be….no NOT on the beach with is shirt off wowing the ladies and looking for someone that will take a picture of him but rather….

On the FREAKING HOT SEAT!

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18.  Kirk Ferentz, Iowa – It’s not just the Iowa football team that is a Complete Freaking Disaster at the University of Iowa after reading about who Iowa just hired as the new president of the school….

The University of Iowa Campus looking west from Old Capitol and the Pentacrest.

Rocky Start for University of Iowa President, Rekha Basu, Des Moines Register

“Less than 2 percent of the faculty thinks J. Bruce Harreld is qualified to be the University of Iowa’s next president; among the college community at large, it’s 2.6 percent. By contrast, more than 90 percent of respondents to a campus survey gave high ratings to the other three finalists.

Nonetheless, Harreld was named UI’s 21st president Thursday in a unanimous vote from the Iowa Board of Regents. In so doing, they chose a former business executive with no experience in university administration, whose resume lists as his present employer a company he has since acknowledged no longer exists.

Harreld has also admitted he’ll have a steep learning curve for the job, and that his “unusual background” will mean he’ll need a lot of teaching, coaching and mentoring from those who criticized him. It’s good he acknowledged that, and gracious to extend the olive branch. But considering he’ll earn $590,000, plus $200,000 annually in deferred compensation, on-the-job training shouldn’t be necessary.”

What in the Freaking Hell?

Of course, the Iowa regents hiring this Buffoon as the new University of Iowa president makes the school paying football coach Kirk Ferentz $4 Million Dollars a year make sense….well…NOTHING can make paying Kirk Ferentz all that money for mediocrity make sense which brings us to the…

$4 Million Dollar Man Kirk Ferentz

…who over the last five seasons while earning around $20 Million Dollars has posted records of…

Overall:  34 – 30

Big Ten:  19 – 21

…which is a good gig if you can’t be the president of the University of Iowa who it seems is NOT qualified for the job while hauling down almost $800K a year!

Anyone else starting to notice a pattern here at the University of Iowa and if so what does that pattern mean?

We don’t know the exact answer to that question but there are plenty of people here at Coaches Hot Seat that are NOT qualified for lots of jobs at the University of Iowa that make six-figures a year and if we can just get to the right person in Iowa no doubt we will be hired in a Helluva hurry…and kept around whether we FAIL at our jobs or not!

Who is dumber….the folks at LSU that can’t move a football game one day forward or the folks at Iowa that pay a football coach millions of dollars for mediocrity and just hired a president that in our opinion that doesn’t know his ass from the side of a barn when it comes to run a major state university?

It’s Iowa by an eyelash!

The N-O Man: The University of Iowa’s new president has no experience, no ideas, and flubbed his own resume, Kembrew McLeod, Slate.com

Oh, these are just Complete Freaking Idiots at the University of Iowa!

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19.  Mike MacIntyre, Colorado – As we said last week in the Preseason Coaches Hot Seat Ranking Analysis we were hoping for a…

Herculean Effort

…by Mike MacIntyre and the Colorado Buffs in 2015 and what in the Hell did the CU Buffs do in the first game against Hawaii?

The CU Buffs looked like Complete Freaking Buffoons at the opening of the game against the Warriors and it really looked like the head coach and coaching staff showed up at the first game on the sideline without coaching during August camp at all!

Geez….Mike MacIntyre…what in the Hell is going on in Boulder son?

Our recommendation for Colorado head coach Mike MacIntyre: Get things fixed with your football team this week against UMass because if you lose that Week 3 game to Colorado State which has a first-year head coach in Mike Bobo the rest of the 2015 football season could turn into a Complete Freaking Disaster especially with the Oregon Ducks coming to town on October 3.

If Colorado somehow lost to UMass this Saturday in Boulder Mike MacIntyre and the entire CU coaching staff should be fired before they leave the field and a local high school staff should be hired to coach the rest of the season!

Memo to Mike MacIntyre:  Get Off Your Ass Son!

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20.  Mike Leach, Washington StateReally Mike Leach?

Lose to Portland State in the home opening game in Pullman?

Really Mike Leach?

Your Football Team looked like SHIT on Saturday Mike Leach and since we know you can coach we can only draw ONE conclusion after that pitiful loss to Portland State:

Mike Leach just no longer gives a SHIT because his Washington State football team now plays like SHIT!

In Mike Leach’s last 15 football games at Washington State the Cougars are…

3 – 12

…and those 3 wins last season were over….

Portland State
Utah
Oregon State

Oh…Portland State and Oregon State had losing records last year so in the last 15 games Mike Leach has beaten…

1 Team with a winning record

…and anyone that recalls the Washington State – Utah game from last season knows it took a miracle for the Cougars to win that game!

What is going on at Washington State exactly with Mike Leach?

Well…it’s just our opinion…but Mike Leach was always a terrible fit for Pullman, Washington because look at where Mike Leach was living when he could live anywhere he wanted to live…

Key West, Florida

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Still…Mike Leach won a lot of football games at Texas Tech in Lubbock, Texas which isn’t Key West, Florida either so there really is no excuse for Mike Leach to be losing to Portland State in the first game of this third season at Washington State so then just what in the Hell is going on in Pullman?

We think we know BUT we are going to hold our tongue and watch and see IF…

Mike Leach and Washington State just flat out QUIT in 2015 after the opening season loss OR if they come back strong this week in a very tough game at Rutgers.

Your choice Mike Leach and Washington State BUT if Mike Leach does fail at Washington State he will be remembered as…

The Football Coach that got run out of Lubbock

AND

The Football Coach that QUIT in Pullman

Great thing is Mike Leach will be able to determine how this story ends and if it ends badly whether we like Mike Leach or not if the current trend continues in Pullman we will light Mike Leach’s ass up!

Is everyone reading the Coaches Hot Seat Blog starting to understand that we are TOUGHEST on the people we expect the most from?

That’s way ALL alumni and fans should be….don’t accept anything less than…

EXCELLENCE

…and you have a Helluva lot better chance of actually getting…

EXCELLENCE!

21 – 30 Post Week Hot Seat Coaches Analysis Coming Soon!