Tag Archive: Nebraska

Post Week 12 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny! – Bozo the Clown

 

Where Oh Where do these College Football Weeks and Life in General go these days we don’t know but Week 12 of the 2023 College Football Season is in the books and with that let’s bring out the Great Johnny Cash to give these Hot Seat Coaches Hell!

Thank You Johnny!

Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

1.  Lincoln Riley, USC – One would think in Lincoln Riley’s 26 th game as the Head Coach of the Mighty USC Trojans that the USC program would be ROLLING and we mean whipping the Hell outta folks but actually in that 26 th game against cross-town rival UCLA Riley’s team…

Didn’t even show-up and didn’t seem to ever care that there was a football game on Saturday!

How in Hell exactly can your ass be making over $10M a year and you cannot get your football team ready and motivated to play your biggest rival UCLA?

That’s Is Lincoln Riley’s Only Damn Job and Riley has Totally Failed in his Only Damn Job and if we were the AD at USC we would have fired Riley’s ass on the field right after the game and when it comes to Worthless Arrogant Bastards like Riley who hasn’t worked…

1 Damn Day of his Life in the Real World

…if the Boy is not getting his ass kissed by everyone 24/7 365….think the Dabo Swinney of the West Coast…then in our opinion USC is not going to get…

Damn Anything from Riley from here on out so you might as well run his ass now…or run it one year from today!

In his last 14 games at USC Lincoln Riley is…

7 – 7

…and the Trojans could have easily lost to…

Colorado
Arizona
California

…this season and be looking at a Losing Record in Riley’s second year on the job when many had the Trojans going undefeated in Year 2 of the Riley regime!

Everyone with a 2+ IQ knew that after the 2022 season that USC had to fix their Defense and what does Riley do to address that issue?

Not One Damn Thing leaving Alex Grinch in charge who he had to fire during the season to at least show his ass was doing something but this goes much deeper than just the USC Defense being a Total Disaster because the Trojans Football Team…

Did Not Give 1 Damn Rip about playing against UCLA on Saturday

…and for that Riley’s ass should have already been fired and given 30 minutes to get everything cleared-out and off the USC campus!

We wrote and said and Tweeted and told anyone that would listen for years that Clay Helton was a Total Disaster and was going to Destroy USC Football if allowed to hang around coaching the Trojans but after his first full 2 seasons on the job as the Head Coach at USC Helton’s record was..

21 – 6

Lincoln Riley’s record after 2 seasons with a bowl game left…

18 – 8

In Year 3 Clay Helton went 5 – 7 and Clay had a Helluva Lot More coming back to play for the Trojans in Year 3 than what Riley has coming back in 2024 and…wait for it…

USC is headed into the Big Ten Conference!

USC’s 2024 Football Schedule >

LSU – Las Vegas
Utah State
At Michigan
Wisconsin
At Minnesota
Penn State
At Maryland
Rutgers
At Washington
Nebraska
At UCLA
Notre Dame

How many games you think the USC is gonna win next season realizing now that…

The USC Football Team has already Totally Quit on Lincoln Riley in 2023!

Got another 5, 6, or 7 win season?

That is why Lincoln Riley should be fired TODAY before this gets worse….a Helluva Lot Worse!

2.  Tom Allen, Indiana – With Indiana’s loss to Michigan State at home on Saturday that leaves the Hoosiers record in 2023 at…

3 – 8

…and Allen’s Records at IU now at >

Overall:  33 – 48
Big Ten:  18 – 42

Tom took Indiana to 2 seasons of .500+ football and 2 bowl games in 7 years on the job which is….

Below Average

…because we would expect that to be 3 to 4 .500+ seasons at IU in 7 years and really now that’s enough said on this matter and we wish Tom all the luck in the world in the future….at Indiana or elsewhere!

3.  Sam Pittman, Arkansas – It was announced on Sunday that Sam Pittman will be back to coach the Razorbacks in 2024 and Good For Sam who was asked after the Hogs win over FIU about his job status with Sam basically saying…

Talking about me being fired isn’t great for recruiting

…which is of course why Head Football Coaches need to…

Win Some Damn Football Games!

…and then no one will ask your ass about your job status!

In 4 seasons at Arkansas Pittman has posted records of…

Overall:  23 – 24
SEC:  11 – 22

…which we would put in the Average category which ain’t gonna make anyone happy in the State of Arkansas because who in the Hell likes Average As Hell anyway?

No one and on that particular issue we have a good buddy who lives in Texarkana, Arkansas who we been going fishing with when we in that part of the world for 25+ years now and this Ole Boy could buy and sell most folks in Arkansas outside of the Waltons in less than 15 minutes and that Ole Boy had a very astute comment on Sam Pittman after Sam got a new contract from Arkansas >

“Sam has lost a little of his fire since he got that big new contract. Can’t say I blame him, but there’s definitely less want-to with Sam than there has been in the past.”

We would agree with that statement and now given another year on the job it’s up to Sam to get the Hogs back to at least Above Average forgetting about Great or Awesome but the 2024 Arkansas schedule is a bear for sure…with SEC Game dates not set yet >

UAPB
At Oklahoma State
UAB
Texas A&M – Dallas
La. Tech
LSU
Ole Miss
Tennessee
Texas
At Auburn
At Miss State
At Mizzou

9 Wins = Awesome
8 Wins = Great
7 Wins = Good
6 Wins = Average
5 Wins = Disaster

We would imagine Sam’s gonna need 7 Wins Minimum in 2024 to return to coach Arkansas in 2025 with 6 Wins not making anyone happy and 5 Wins…

Turn out the Lights and Sell the Jukebox because this is OVER!

Get Em Sam!

4.  Billy Napier, Florida – It was good to see the Florida Gators with some fight on Saturday night against Missouri, especially compared to USC which didn’t even show-up to play against UCLA at home, but this is FLORIDA we are talking about here and Billy Boy Napier now sitting on records at UF of…

Overall:  11 – 13
SEC:  6 – 10

This is FLORIDA we are talking about here and in his first 2 years on the job Billy Boy has gone…

6 – 7
5 – 6

…and Dan Mullen in his first 2 years at Florida went >

10 – 3
11 – 2

This is FLORIDA we are talking about here so Billy Napier is in a Helluva spot with an undefeated Florida State team coming to town next week, although without their Starting QB, and if Billy Boy loses to the Seminoles to post a losing season in Year 2….

This is FLORIDA we are talking about there….Right?

5.  Dave Aranda, Baylor – After back-to-back losses by the scores of…

59 – 25
42 – 17

….the Baylor football program is in a Total Free-Fall and watching Dave Aranda after the loss to TCU it seems Dave doesn’t have a Damn Clue what is going on with his own football program…

46 Games into his tenure at Baylor!

It’s easy to see football programs where the Players have quit listening to the Coaches like at Baylor but it’s often difficult to know why the Players are no longer listening to the Coaches and really impossible for us at Coaches Hot Seat to know what is going on inside the Baylor Football Program in Waco but there’s something going on that is causing this Rolling Disaster that has caused the Bears to post a record of…

3 – 12

…in their last 15 games!

If Dave Aranda looks closely enough at the Baylor Football Program, things He and his Coaches have or haven’t done, and other issues around the Bears Program and the Baylor campus itself he will more than likely find what is causing this Rolling Disaster and often the very best place to look when a sports team or workplace is in chaos, dysfunction, and is under-achieving is the Leader looking right into the mirror at his or her own actions….or lack of action on 1 or more things!

Baylor now at 3 – 8 on the season has one game left….hosting West Virginia next Saturday and we would recommend that Dave Aranda win this game or at the very least make it a close game because another blowout in this spot and that could be it for the Aranda era at Baylor!

6.  Ken Wilson, Nevada – With the Nevada loss to Colorado State on Saturday that leaves Head Coach Ken Wilson’s records at Nevada…

Overall:  4 – 19
MWC:  2 – 13

That’s plenty said on this situation!

7.  Dana Holgorsen, Houston – We saw that Tillman Fertitta the University of Houston Super-Booster said that…

Dana Holgorsen will be back to Coach Houston in 2024

…and only thing we can say to Tillman besides…

“We need some more rolls and butter out here and Pronto Son!”

…is that Ole Tillman must have some Really Low Expectations for Houston Football if he thinks 4 – 7 is Acceptable Football and the Cougs still have to play a road game at UCF to round out their first season in the Big 12 which could see a…

2 – 7

…record in Big 12 play!

Oh but Tillman says…

“We won a couple of Big 12 games!”

Oh that’s Rich and when the Hell you gonna get those Rolls and Butter out to us Son?

Ole Tillman did say…

“Next year we’ll expect a lot more.”

Fine but we expected those Rolls and Butter out here 15 minutes ago and they ain’t here yet Son!

8.  Mario Cristobal, Miami – Mario Cristobal’s Overall Record at FIU, Oregon, and Miami >

73 – 72

Mario Cristobal’s Overall Record at Miami >

11 – 12

Y’all starting to notice a trend here?

Good then your ass has a 2+ IQ and after the loss to Louisville on Saturday the Canes in Year 2 under Mario are at 6 – 5 with a game left…

At Boston College

…and a BC Head Coach in Jeff Hafley who REALLY needs a win and if Miami loses this game and ends up at…

11 – 13

…in 2 years on the job for Mario then what in Hell is this Boy being paid for because this ain’t it!

Oh….Miami under Mario record in ACC play >

5 – 10

That ain’t good at Duke so it sure the Hell ain’t good at Miami!

9.  Matt Rhule, Nebraska – There’s just no explaining the end of the Nebraska at Wisconsin game when it comes to the Huskers clock management and if Nebraska had found a way to substitute Bozo the Clown for Matt Rhule in 4 th quarter of that game the Huskers more than likely beaten Wisconsin but since the man that played Bozo has been dead for years now that wasn’t possible but Hell you could have dressed up Any Damn Moron in a Bozo outfit and he or she done better than Rhule handling things in yet another loss for Nebraska…the hits just keep coming…and now it’s…

Beat Iowa at home or Losing Season for Year 1 under Matt Rhule at Nebraska!

Hey….maybe put Any Random Guy in the Bozo outfit on the sideline coaching the Huskers against Iowa and give him $25 and a voucher for 50% off at Chuck-E-Cheese and Hell Nebraska will at least have a chance against the Hawkeyes and that’s something for AD Trev Alberts to give a good deal of thought about this week and we know where you can get your hands on a Bozo outfit Trev so give us a ring if you decide to go that route Son!

10.  Danny Gonzales, New Mexico – Somehow the 3 – 7 New Mexico Lobos went to the Central Valley of California on Saturday night and knocked off Fresno State to move to 4 – 7 on the season with game against Utah State at home left to play and Danny Gonzeles’ records at UNM are now…

Overall:  11 – 31
MWC:  5 – 25

That’s ain’t good folks…not good at all!

11.  Jeff Hafley, Boston College – Just when you thought that Jeff Hafley had gotten his ass off the Hot Seat for 2023 by reeling off 5 straight wins his BC Eagles turn around and lose 2 straight games and here comes Miami to Boston to end the season and since Hafley’s records at BC are now…

Overall:  21 – 25
ACC:  12 – 21

…we recommend he beats the Canes in this 2023 season finale because a loss in this spot to Mario and the Sputtering Canes would be nothing short of a Total Disaster!

12.  Brent Pry, Virginia Tech – Brent Pry if anything is Inconsistent as All Get Out and after losing to NC State on Saturday the Hokies now have to win the last game of the season against a surging Virginia team on the road to get to 6 Wins in 2023 and…

We are talking about VIRGINIA TECH here…aren’t we?

Yep we are and in 2 years on the job in Blacksburg Brent Pry is now sitting on records of..

Overall:  8 – 14
ACC:  5 – 9

That’s is nothing short of a Total Disaster when talking about VIRGINIA TECH Football and just by comparison Justin Fuente who was run out of Blacksburg to hire Pry had records in his first 2 seasons at Va. Tech of…

Overall:  19 – 8
ACC:  11 – 5

Don’t lose this game to Virginia Son…just don’t do it!

Let’s Play Football!

Post Week 11 Coaches Hot Seat Rankings – Give These Hot Seat Coaches Hell Johnny! – These Prima Donna Million $$$ Head Coaches Need To Get Off Their Worthless Asses and Show Up and Work!

 

Post Week 11 of the 2023 CFB Season is done and that’s just Not Believable but onto Week 12 we go!

The Coaches Hot Seat Member who normally writes the Coaches Hot Seat Rankings Analysis each week during the season is traveling in Europe on business so wasn’t here last week to do the Post Week 10 write-up and he’s not back yet as he is still working to drum-up more business on the Continent so we have a pinch-hitter at the plate and believe this is usually the spot we bring out the Great Johnny Cash to give these Hot Seat Coaches Hell so come on out Johnny!

Thank You Mr. Cash!

Coaches Hot Seat Rankings

1.  Tom Allen, Indiana – Tom Allen is a Good Man who has done a decent job at Indiana but with 3 Straight Losing Seasons now locked-in we doubt Tom will survive to coach the Hoosiers in 2024 but what in Hell do we know?

With the loss to the Illini on Saturday the Hoosiers are now 3 – 7 with games left against…

Michigan State
At Purdue

Hell…both those games are Winnable so let’s see if you can win the them Tom and Good Luck to You Coach!

2.  Sam Pittman, Arkansas – Sam Pittman also a Good Man who has gotten behind the 8-Ball at Arkansas and we not are not quite sure why the Hogs weren’t ready to play Auburn at home after a Big Win over the Gators on the road but a devastating and disastrous loss to Florida leaves Arkansas at 3 – 7 with games left against…

FIU
Missouri

Hell….Arkansas can win both those games and finish at 5 – 7 and maybe Sam can get this thing straightened-out in the offseason but what in the Hell do we know?

3.  Billy Napier, Florida – It’s hard to know what to make of Billy Napier at Florida who has Severely Underperformed with the Gators compared to recent Florida Head Coaches and here’s how recent UF Coaches done in their first 2 years on the job realizing Billy Boy now sitting on record of…

11 – 12

Gators HCs after 2 seasons >

Dan Mullen:  21 – 5
Jim McElwain:  19 – 8
Will Muschamp:  15 – 11
Urban Meyer:  22 – 4
Ron Zook:  16 – 10
Steve Spurrier:  19 – 4
Galen Hall:  17 – 1 – 1

That’s why Billy has been nothing short of a Total Disaster and we haven’t a clue what we would do if we hired as AD at Florida tomorrow besides sitting down with Napier and finding out…

Just what in the Hell is going on here Son?

Florida is now at 5 – 5 on the season has left in 2023…

At Mizzou
Florida State

That looks like 5 – 7 to us and that would leave Napier’s 2-year record at Florida at…

11 – 14

What in the Hell is going on in Gainesville exactly to cause that and for the life of us and we cannot think of 1 Damn Reason why this could possibly happen but then what in the Hell do we know?

4.  Danny Gonzales, New Mexico – In 4 seasons at New Mexico Danny Gonzales records are >

Overall:   10 – 31
MWC:  4 – 25

Enough said on that.

5.  Dave Aranda, Baylor – In Dave Aranda’s last 14 games his record is…

3 – 11

3 and Freaking 11!

What in the Hell is going on in Waco exactly?

Aranda’s Records at Baylor >

Overall:  23 – 23
Big 12:  15 – 19

That’s just Damn Pitiful and 3 – 7 Bears have left in 2023 >

At TCU
West Virginia

That looks like 3 – 9 to us and that’s just Damn Pitiful and is driven by an Arrogance that Dave Aranda believes he knows more about the Game of Football than anyone else on Earth, in our humble opinion, and not surprisingly the Baylor Bears are getting their asses handed to them which is not surprising to us at all!

6.  Ken Wilson, Nevada – With the loss to Utah State on Saturday Nevada’s record in 2023 dropped to 2 – 8 and Head Coach Ken Wilson’s Records at UNR now stand at >

Overall:   4 – 18
MWC:  2 – 12

Nevada has left this season games against…

At Colorado State
Wyoming

That looks like 2 – 10 to us and enough said on that!

7.  Dana Holgorsen, Houston – Saturday’s home loss to a Hapless Cincinnati team was Holgorsen’s 57 th game as the Head Coach at Houston and if that’s what your ass is going to put on the field in your 57 th game at a job like Houston paying your ass $3M+ a season then your ass should be fired on the field right after the game!

Now at 4 – 6 on the season for Houston with games left against…

Oklahoma State
At UCF

…Holgorsen may very well end up with Another Losing Season at Houston which be…

3 Losing Seasons in 5 Years on the job!

What in the Hell?

Hell, that’s worse than Jimbo Fisher and Fisher’s ass just got run out of College Station even though he had a $77M buyout!

8.  Zach Arnett, Mississippi State – What we don’t get about Zach Arnett’s tenure at Mississippi State is just why in the Hell with a returning QB who is very Damn good QB running The Pirate’s system why change to an offense different from the one that Mike Leach had such great success with in Starkville?

It Just Makes No Damn Sense At All!

With the destruction of the Bulldogs by Texas A&M that leaves Miss State at 4 – 6 on the year with games left against…

Southern Miss
Ole Miss

We would Highly Recommend Zach winning both of these games if he wants to hold onto his job and for Damn sure if we were hiring a Head Coach at Mississippi State we would find a Coach that could run an up-tempo offense that was the same or something similar to what The Pirate ran in Starkville because that’s the…

Only Damn Way at MSU Your Ass Is Winning in the SEC Conference folks!

9.  Lincoln Riley, USC – You have to wonder…

Is Lincoln Riley just a Damn Moron, is he just Very Stubborn, or is the Boy just a Damn Moron because Everyone with a 2+ IQ saw that the Trojans Defense cost USC a shot at a National Title last season but Ole Lincoln Boy comes back with…

Same DC with Same Crapola Defense and has to run that DC in the middle of the season because of that Same Crapola Defense!

What exactly is your ass thinking Riley or does your ass even know 2 + 2 and/or that your ass has to play Some Kind of Damn Defense to Win Something Son?

USC has now lost 4 of their last 5 games and shoulda have lost at Cal and could have easily lost to Arizona and Colorado too because of that…

Same Crapola Defense

…and now the 7 – 4 Trojans who Bozo the Clown could have coached to 10 Wins Minimum have left in 2023…

UCLA

…at the Coliseum and the Bruins are playing Crapola Football too as well so this should be a Humdinger of a Game with the Losing Head Coach having his ass launched onto the…

Face of the Sun Hot Seat!

10.  Mario Cristobal, Miami – In 2 seasons at Miami Mario Cristobal is now sitting on a record of…

11 – 11

…and the 6 – 4 Canes have games left against…

Louisville
At Boston College

…this season and Hell Miami could easily lose both of those games and here are Miami HCs records after 2 seasons on the job >

Manny Diaz:  14 – 10
Mark Richt:  19 – 7
Al Golden:  13 – 11
Randy Shannon:  12 – 13
Larry Coker:  24 – 1
Butch Davis:  17 – 6
Dennis Erickson:  21 – 3
Jimmy Johnson:  18 – 7
Howard Schnellenberger:  14 – 9

Hell….Mario Cristobal could end up with the Worst Damn First 2 Years of a Head Coach in Modern Miami Football History and save us the Horseshit that Mario took over a worse situation than some of the above Coaches!

That’s Absolute Crapola and for Mario to claim that is Total Horseshit and how a Damn Loser talks!

It’s Miami Son! Quit Crying and Coach Your Damn Team and Earn that $10M a season or resign but whichever….Quit Your Damn Crying and Excuse-Making your Prima Donna Piece of Crapola who hasn’t done…

1 Damn Thing In Your Entire Life to have EARNED the Right to Coach Miami and you get the job anyway and cry to anyone and everyone that your ass took over a disaster!

That’s Horseshit!

11.  Butch Jones, Arkansas State – Butch Jones in 3 seasons at Arkansas State >

Overall:  10 – 24
Sun Belt:  5 – 17

Oh the 5 – 5 Red Wolves have left in 2023…

Texas State
At Marshall

We Highly Recommend Butch beat Texas State on Saturday and Marshall on November 25!

12.  Matt Rhule, Nebraska – Tell you what we are Damn Tired Of here at Coaches Hot Seat >

Coaches making $9M+ a year and putting teams on the field that perform like Total Crapola as if…

Their Asses Are Not Even Coached at All

…which is the way that Nebraska played against Maryland at home on Saturday!

Just what in the Hell is your ass doing all week Matt because if you are going to claim that You and the Nebraska Coaches were actually Coaching the Huskers last week in the run-up to the Terps game…

All Your Damn Asses should be fired Right Damn Now!

Memo to Matt Rhule >  Get off Your Lazy Damn Ass and Start Coaching Nebraska and if your ass isn’t interested in Coaching the Huskers then your ass needs to be run out of Lincoln as well and this time the folks at Nebraska can hire…

Bozo the Clown because at least Bozo’s ass would show up and Do His Damn Job which your ass is not doing Son!

$9M+ a year and your ass loses at home to a Pitiful Maryland team….Geez…

Matt Rhule’s ass should be fired tonight and put on Greyhound Bus to Loserville USA where his ass would be right at Damn Home!

The now 5 – 5 Huskers have left this season…

At Wisconsin
Iowa

Got 5 – 7?

You gonna have it Nebraska fans because Matt Rhule’s ass ain’t gonna do Damn anything because if his ass actually showed up and worked the Nebraska team would…wait for it…

Show Up and Play Football!

Matt Rhule = Just Another Overpaid Worthless Excuse for a Head Coach who needs to get his Worthless Ass run and run out of football FOREVER!

Let’s Play Football!